Work Text:
WAGS
Lily
ok guys today is day
i am meeting the Pikes
Jackie
Excited to meet u!
Lily
i have even convinced Shane to take break from bird food diet
Jackie
Praise the lord!
Lily
praise me, not god. I made this happen. I am very persuasive
ok Jackie leave us now i need to speak to the girls
Jackie
Im literally in this chat
Lily
i cannot remove you from chat but how can I send girls the updates if you are also reading them
mute the chat
you can read it after
Jackie
FINE
Lily
jackie
JACKIE
...
ok I think she is gone
help us, me and Shane are trying to cook recipe for everyone but it is not going well
Sarah
Maybe I can help! I'm a dietician
What's the issue
Lily
i think we are both a bit used to only cooking for ourselves
4 adults and 4 little Pikes is different
Sarah
Well for starters
Amber is like 1 month old. So she probably won't be needed anything
Lily
good point
i did not think of this
…
ok Shane had figured this out himself. Smart boy
Precious
Wow
Lily
problem we are having is we could not find exact ingredients in shop
shane has made this before for his parents but he had all the ingredients then so I think he is stuck
i think we can improvise and it will be OK but I dont know much about Japanese food
Sarah
Okay
Yeah, Shane is a stickler for recipes. I've watched him measure out his protein powder with a scale before
Lily
yes
he is making cute little frown
Sarah
What ingredients are you missing
Lily
oyster sauce and rice wine vinegar
Sarah
Okay, so basically something sweet and amazing, and some acid. Easy!
Lily
what is umami
nevermind I google
Sarah
Instead of oyster sauce try soy sauce and sugar, or something else like hoisin sauce
And instead of the vinegar, you can use lime juice
Lily
ok
i tell him Sarah gives advice so he cannot argue with dietician
he accepts this
we are back in business
Sarah
Glad I could help
Lily
thank you
next problem
guys what do i even talk about with Hayden
only thing I know about him is hockey player and many children
Precious
Well thats a good place to start no?
Do you know much about hockey?
Lily
i know everything about hockey
more than Hayden does
Precious
Ok so you talk about hockey, easy
And Hayds loves talking about his kids, just ask him anything about them and he'll go on a giant monologue
Lily
they are bringing the children, maybe I will just talk to them
Precious
You like kids?
Lily
yes I love them, much less boring than adults
i have niece back home who i love very much
but I cannot see her anymore
Precious
Oh, why not?
Lily
family is hard, my brother is not big fan of me
Precious
I’m sorry that must be very hard
Lily
Yes
does Hayden also like to talk about Shane
this is other thing we have in common
we are both Shane experts
Precious
YES
Haydens lowkey obsessed with shane
fave bromance
____
Lily
SOS
what to do when it turns out boyfriend is very good with children
i am too young to be teen mom
jackie your children are very cute. are you sure they are Hayden’s
Precious
GIRL
I feel you
You have to stay strong, this is how i ended up 6 months pregnant at my own wedding
Tell me you’re on contraception
Lily
i will not get pregnant i promise
oh god
he is reading bedtime story
he is doing all the little voices for the different characters
i did not know he could do this
maybe i will get pregnant after all
Jackie
LILY
Don’t think i won’t send this to shane
Lily
jackie! you weren’t supposed to be reading the chat yet!
___
Lily
Hayden and Shane have gone outside to talk while I clear up dinner
Precious
A tragedy for feminism
Lily
what? no
shane is very respectful of women
and he will make great housewife one day
i do not mind clearing up
Precious
Did you win Hayden over then?
Lily
is still work in progress I think
but we only argued a few times and mostly about hockey
Hayden
Shane
Thanks for coming and being nice…ish
Hayden
That was truly the most surreal evening I've ever had
Shane
Youre telling me
…did you like him?
Hayden
Im not ready to answer that question yet lol
I will say i’ve never seen you like that
You were positively giddy
Shane
Yeah, i kind of feel like that all the time now
Hayden
The only time I’ve seen you look giddy before was when you were texting Lily
And well, guess it makes sense that now you’re properly together that’s dialled up to 100
Look, its bonkers. But i’m really happy for you
Shane
Thank you
You’re not mad?
Hayden
Oh I’m livid actually
Jackie knew and I didn’t???
Shane
She didn’t know on purpose!
I got overexcited and accidentally told her Lily was a man
And she’s a very smart lady so it didn’t take her that long to figure it out
In her words “theres only one man in Boston who could handle you, and that’s Ilya Rosanov”
Hayden
I hate that it’s true
As if you could date any one but the one guy who has been your equal for your whole career
It would just be embarrassing to date a man who was worse at hockey than you
Shane
What the hell hahaha
It’s true though… there’s never really been anyone else who could compare
Hayden
And to think you always rolled your eyes every time I told you you’d find the one! I love being right
Shane
The one?
Hayden
Sorry is that too intense
Shane
Yes? It’s kind of a big claim
But also no? Because he’s the only person I’ve ever even slightly felt this way about. So who else could it be
Hayden
Damn I might have to start liking him if he’s turning into a romantic
Shane
I can’t believe he has to go :((((
It’s not fair
Hayden
Jackie and i will give you all our best long distance tips
WAGS
Lily
SOS
how to do long distance without going crazy please
Sarah
I thought you guys were always long distance
Lily
yes but before i did not know i could really have him
and now i have him but i dont really have him because I’m leaving today and he is going to be in stupid canada and i am not
Sarah
Oh babe :(