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Tango felt like screaming.
He was trying to make a bracelet for Jimmy.
Something shiny and pretty.
Something just for him.
But it wasn’t right.
It wasn’t right.
Tango slammed his hands down on the counter, heat rising to his hair and to his face.
He just-
God, he just wanted to do something right.
There was a knock on the door, and he screeched, shoving everything back into his box.
Jimmy laughed softly, opening the door and peeking in.
“Hi love.”
Tango wished he wasn’t flaming right now.
He wished he could share in whatever joy Jimmy was feeling right now, since, for once, his soulbound seemed calm.
Not skittish, nothing weighting his mind.
But Tango’s stupid inadequacy.
Always inadequate.
Never right.
Jimmy frowned suddenly, walking over to where Tango was.
“Hon, you’re flaring. What’s wrong?”
Tango’s face flushed, though not from his rising temperature.
Why did Jimmy have to be so nice?
“It’s nothing.”
Jimmy hummed, unconvinced, but his attention span got the best of him.
“Oh, what’re you working on?”
Tango flinched backwards, stepping in front of Jimmy.
Fuck.
Nononono.
It wasn’t finished.
He couldn’t-
He couldn’t see it yet.
It needed to be perfect.
Or else it wasn’t worth anything.
“No- it’s not… done yet.”
“Oh. Well, okay.”
Jimmy looked confused now, and Tango tried to explain.
“It’s not… right. It needs to be perfect.”
To match you.
“Oh. Well, that’s fine. I don’t mind if it’s unfinished though.”
Tango’s tail whipped around behind him.
No, he really didn’t.
Tango shook his head.
“Okay.”
Jimmy smiled a little confusedly, then perked up.
“Oh! I made food!”
Food sounded nice.
: : :
Later that night, Tango lay with Jimmy in the bed.
Jimmy was half asleep under him, wings spread open on the bed.
Tango gently stroked the feathers he could reach, feeling the sensation ripple across his back.
Jimmy cooed happily under him.
Tango propped his chin up on Jimmy's chest, staring at his soulbound.
At least he was good at this.
His chest felt all nice and warm again, and he knew he was keeping Jimmy warm too.
He could do that right.
Nothing else.
God.
Keeping Jimmy happy was a good thing to be good at though.
Tango’s flames died a little despite himself.
Why was he such a failure?
Jimmy opened his eyes, confusion obvious in his eyes.
“Love, as much as I want to give you space, you’ve been off all day, and now you’re dimming. Please, tell me what’s wrong?”
Tango didn’t want to tell him.
Talking about it made it worse.
But… Jimmy was looking at him with those big eyes.
And he couldn’t say no to him.
“I… just wanted to make it right.”
Jimmy slowly sat up, cupping tango’s face in both his hands.
“Love, is this still about your project?”
Kind of.
So much more.
“A little…”
“What do you mean, a little?”
Such a hard question.
“...um… it’s…”
Tango trailed off.
Fuck.
How do you put this into words?
How do you tell the most amazing, beautiful person in the world that you can’t do anything right, that you never have been able to, and that you try so, so hard, but it doesn’t work, and you just keep failing?
Because that’s what he was.
A failure.
Maybe he’d figured out how to help Jimmy, and god he loved him, but he knew he’d mess it up.
Jimmy had his curse, and Tango would happily bear it if it meant getting to spend his time with him, all his time, but this was the curse that Tango couldn’t live with.
He wanted to do something right.
Please.
“I can’t do anything right.”
Oh.
That wasn’t as hard as Tango thought it would be.
But now…
Now Jimmy’s face fell, and Tango waited for… something.
Yelling?
That didn’t seem right.
No, Jimmy wouldn’t yell.
But now he knew.
God.
He would think about it, and he would know.
He would realize.
All the times that Tango’s failed him.
But Jimmy gently brushed a finger over Tango’s cheekbone.
That… wasn’t…
What that fuck was happening?
“Please tell me that’s not how you feel?”
Tango frowned.
But it was true.
“Oh, Tango…”
Jimmy gently pressed their foreheads together.
“Why would you ever think that?”
Tango shrugged in confusion.
“Because it’s true?”
“No.”
No?
God, Jimmy could be so stubborn.
“Jimmy.”
Jimmy raised his eyebrows in question.
“I don’t… need you to sugarcoat it. I know.”
“I’m not.”
Shrunk back, and Jimmy chirped in surprise.
“No, come back, I’m not done.”
Tango froze, and Jimmy gently pulled him close again.
“I don’t know what you see, and God knows I never will, but I just want you to remember that you’re doing alright. And that sounds cringe, and you can laugh at me if you want, but you look like you need to hear it.”
Hm.
That made everything swim.
“Damn you-”
Jimmy laughed softly, just a touch sadly, pulling Tango to his chest.
“Why are you so nice to me when I keep messing up?”
“You haven’t messed anything up.”
“Fuck- you don’t know that.”
“Yes, I do.”
“But- you’re so goddamn perfect, and I just… I can't do a single thing right.”
“I feel like this isn’t just about the project.”
Tango laughed sharply.
“No, but it’s a good example. It shouldn’t be this hard for me to make, but I just can’t make it right, and it’s just…”
He didn’t know.
“I don’t know.”
Jimmy sighed softly, moving a hand to stroke Tango’s spine.
“I don’t think you mess everything up. Sometimes I don’t even understand what you’re talking about, it’s that complicated.”
“Yeah, but that’s different.”
“How so?”
“That stuff is easy, it doesn’t… impact people. I can’t do people things right.”
“I think you do pretty well.”
“That’s because you’re a fucking optimist.”
Jimmy just sighed.
“I’m sorry.”
“No, love, please don’t apologize.”
Tango closed his mouth.
“It’s okay to not do things perfectly.”
“But… you’re so perfect.”
Jimmy laughed.
“Tango, honey, I am not perfect.”
“I think you are.”
Tango could feel Jimmy's blush.
“Hm. Well, that wasn’t really what I meant. I mean you don’t need to do everything perfectly.”
That didn’t make a lot of sense.
But he supposed…
Maybe Jimmy was right?
Maybe?
He could try, at least.
But…
“I don’t know how to do that.”
“Well… if you think something is good, not perfect, but you like it, then that can be good. And… if you’re people-ing weird, then ask? I’m sure you stress about stuff more than you need to.”
“Okay.”
He could try.
Jimmy nodded, then flopped over.
Tango shrieked, finding himself piled under Jimmy’s wings and arms.
Jimmy giggled, feathers fluffing up.
“You-”
Jimmy chirped in response, and Tango sighed in defeat.
“Okay.”
Tango warmed his hands before hugging Jimmy.
He could use a hug right now anyways.
Jimmy warbled sleepily, and Tango realized just how late it had gotten.
“Yeah, let’s go to sleep.”
: : :
Jimmy was singing to himself in the kitchen.
Tango had laughed at him as he'd left to work in the workshop, but now he was finished.
It wasn’t…
No.
Jimmy said it just needs to be good.
Before he could sike himself out, he walked back into the kitchen, poking Jimmy’s side.
“I have something for you.”
Jimmy squawked in surprise, then smiled happily.
“Aww, for me?”
Tango handed him the box, nodding, and Jimmy’s feathers ruffled up happily as he unwrapped it.
Tango laughed.
“Wow, I can’t tell you’re excited at all.”
“Well, it’s not everyday you give me presents!”
Jimmy took out the bracelet, and his eyes went wide.
“YOU MADE THIS?”
Tango nodded, blushing.
He liked it?
He liked it.
Jimmy frantically clipped the clasp on, holding it up to the light.
“Tango, it’s beautiful!”
Tango blushed even redder, ducking his head.
Suddenly, Jimmy kissed him.
“Oh-”
Jimmy whispered against his lips.
“I’m proud of you.”
Hm.
He wasn’t perfect.
And that was okay.
Yes.
That was okay.