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<TheMostMayo> And what’ll happen to you?
<d3rlord3> I don’t know
<TheMostMayo> Don’t lie to me.
There are a million things Derek could say. The branches of the future are endless fraying strings, stretching far and wide into infinity. He can see them all. There are millions of ways he could end this that would be gentler- not kinder, no, because there is really only one way to stop the King and Derek knows what it entails. He could say something about his computer screen and his mind too frayed and broken to survive anyway, give Avery the comfort of knowing that for a brief moment of time they really did play together. That in some distant room Derek was actually typing out these words in real time.
Instead, he tells him the truth.
<d3rlord3> What are you playing on right now?
Avery stares at the screen. God, he hurts all over. Everything aches. His muscles have stayed frozen and locked for far too long, curled up over his shitty desk in his shittier apartment for fifteen hours straight. No, longer than that. His fingers are cramped and trembling. His mouth is dry and his water bottle is empty- but he can’t leave now. Not here, not in this moment. The pinnacle of all he’s fought for, the culmination of this day of terror, he has to see it through to the end.
He blinks and his eyelids drag like sandpaper. He rereads the message, the righteous fury guttering and confused but still flickering as he smashes out a response.
<TheMostMayo> What does that have to do with literally anything
He demands, hoping his tone comes across as scathing and flat as he wants it to.
<d3rlord3> Just answer me
<d3rlord3> please
<d3rlord3> What are you using to play Minecraft?
Hunger pains stab him low in the gut but he ignores it, focused entirely on the world crumbling in front of him. What a stupid question. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is what they’re going to do now- yes, they, because Avery wasn’t fucking leaving, no matter how much Derek tried to convince him to. He was going to save him. He owed him, and not only because Derek did everything he could to protect him in that mine. They both deserved to survive this. They fought so hard. It’s not fair.
But Derek is smart. So much smarter than Avery.
He didn’t ask stupid questions.
<TheMostMayo> A laptop
<TheMostMayo> Happy?
Derek stares at him. His Minecraft avatar idles just like it’s supposed to, but a shiver runs down Avery's spine. It felt like he was… really looking at him. The weight of his eyes reaching through the computer. Not irritated or angry, but… sad. So, so sad. A ravine opens in his belly, a deep well of dread rising like floodwater to choke him. His hands are shaking. Everything hurts.
<d3rlord3> Where did you get the laptop Avery?
The world stalls. Not really- there’s no lag in his game, no skipping frames. This is something else. His world is the thing that stops. His heart fails to beat, his lungs hesitate to fill. His mind refuses to understand the words on the screen. He’s gone blind. He can’t see, can’t comprehend, can’t- can’t- can’t-
No, no, no, it’s not fair. What’s not fair? He doesn’t know. He can’t bring himself to put the pieces together. He should have realized this truth the moment he saw him in the library, how was it possible they were both playing when Avery was playing on Derek’s- but he’s so fucking stupid. Surviving for months off smoothies and cup noodles, yeah right. Staring at a computer screen he can’t look away from or his head will explode.
The same computer screen Avery was- was- he can’t. He can’t come to terms with it. It’s not true. Please, it’s not true.
<d3rlord3> From a storage locker
<d3rlord3> They auction them off right?
<d3rlord3> Mine must have been pretty cheap
<d3rlord3> I imagine it was just the stuff from my dorm room inside
He stares at the words. His eyes burn.
The locker was too big for all the things inside. That was the first thing Avery thought of when he saw it. The turnout for this series of auctions was abysmally small, the little storage center tucked back behind a petsmart and sort of hidden. There were only two units available for sale, this one and a huge beast filled to the brim with random garbage. All of the contents here were piled in random heaps, spread out but still thin and small with large swathes of empty floor. Garbage bags filled with clothes, bed sheets, a tiny desk lamp. So many books, most weathered and worn- well loved. Cherished. A backpack. Boxes filled with notebooks and pens and pencils, layers of college books sandwiched between- He still hadn’t really sorted through it all yet.
He’d bought it for ten bucks.
He’s still not sure why he did. When he goes out for auctions, he usually looks for old furniture- something to flip and resell, hauling dressers or tables out to his parents house so he can work on project pieces in their garage. Anything he’s not sure he can sell he hauls to his own storage unit so he can look through it later.
What would he find if he went through those boxes? Who’s name would be on all those graded papers? And if he dug deeper, would he find pictures? Photo albums? Would he see-
<d3rlord3> That was really all I had
Sometimes, when someone dies and there’s no immediate family to take in their belongings, they all get dropped off at places like those. Shoved haphazard into empty units that mail bills to the last known address, waiting to be paid or picked up. If rent goes delinquent, they’re put up for auction.
The laptop was hidden in the backpack. That was probably the only reason no one else fought him for it.
<TheMostMayo> I don’t understand.
But he does. He does. He’s not so stupid that he can’t connect the dots he just doesn’t want to. He doesn’t want to think anymore.
It’s not fair.
<d3rlord3> It was too much for me Avery
<d3rlord3> It was everything.
That can’t be right. Because- because he’s here, isn’t he? He’s typing to him right now.
<TheMostMayo> Stop it
<TheMostMayo> You’re lying
<TheMostMayo> I’m talking to you right now you can’t be
He sends the message early. He can’t stomach the idea of typing out that final word, as if seeing the definitive nature of it will make it real. Will make it possible. It’s not true because if it was- if it was, that would be such a shit ending. What a cliche, overdone twist. This story was better than that. It had to be.
<d3rlord3> It shattered me
<d3rlord3> Reality warped and failed
<d3rlord3> Your world wasn’t mine anymore
<d3rlord3> I wasn’t lying when I said this place makes the pain bearable
<d3rlord3> But it’s more than that.
His back hurts. It’s such a weird thing to focus on in this moment, but he can’t help but fixate on the twinge in his spine. His head stuck on something so insignificant to avoid the bigger picture. His back hurts.
<TheMostMayo> Wdym
He laughs a little at the unseriousness of his reply. It’s not a happy sound.
<d3rlord3> This is the kings world
<d3rlord3> When I saw him the door opened
<d3rlord3> For me
<d3rlord3> And I went through
<d3rlord3> Not physically. It doesn't work like that
<d3rlord3> But my mind and all that I am is here. Forever.
Oh. Oh, how cruel. How fucking mean and painful and terrible. All this time he was clinging to a hope and a dream that died months ago. He couldn’t save him. He never could.
<d3rlord3> You have to leave Avery
<d3rlord3> Forget about this world
<d3rlord3> It isn’t for you
<TheMostMayo> I cant let you do this
<TheMostMayo> There has to be another way
Even if Derek was gone in his world, he was alive here. Avery can’t let him just… give up.
<d3rlord3> Avery you can’t stay here you have so much life to live
A spike of that anger from before flares and Avery nearly breaks his keyboard when he slaps out a reply.
<TheMostMayo> AND I OWE IT TO YOU
But there’s no quick, snapping response from Derek. There’s just a heavy silence, long enough that his rage fizzles and pops. His strength dwindles and dies. He’s so tired. Everything hurts.
<d3rlord3> I’m dead Avery.
He exhales so hard it’s a wheeze, the words a physical blow that cracks open his ribs. His heart breaks into a million pieces spread out across the cosmos and beyond, the weight of this pain infinite and unrelenting. How had he grown to care for him so much? How did this man, who he didn’t know three months ago, coil himself up in Avery's chest so deeply that his death was ruination?
<d3rlord3> When I look back on my life the thing I’m most proud of is protecting you
<d3rlord3> I know you
<d3rlord3> You deserve to live a long and happy life
His eyes blur with tears.
<TheMostMayo> So do you.
<d3rlord3> Maybe
<d3rlord3> But it’s too late for that now
<d3rlord3> There’s nothing for me in your world anymore
<TheMostMayo> You have me
He tries, but even without infinite knowledge he knows that’s not enough. Avery can’t pull him back from this place. All his love and devotion means nothing against the cruel reality that Derek is simply a ghost in the machine, trapped for infinity.
There’s nothing Avery can do.
<d3rlord3> In another life I would have really liked to meet you
<d3rlord3> Face to face
There’s never been anything more devastating to him than this moment.
<d3rlord3> Let me finish what I started Avery
<d3rlord3> Please
He has to let him go.
<TheMostMayo> I dont want to
<TheMostMayo> I really dont want to
<TheMostMayo> I wanted to save you.
<d3rlord3> I know
<TheMostMayo> One of us should say something cool
<TheMostMayo> As like a badass goodbye
<d3rlord3> I think i’ve got something good
<TheMostMayo> Okay
<TheMostMayo> Goodbye Derek
<TheMostMayo> Thank you.
<d3rlord3> Goodbye Avery
<d3rlord3> And whatever you do at the crossroads
<d3rlord3> Keep moving forward.
<TheMostMayo> Corny
<d3rlord3> Get out of here already.
Avery opens the menu and closes the world for the last time.