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She wakes to her dads frustrated shout. A hand striking against the hood of the car after closing it.
“Mom, what's wrong?" Her mom turns back to look at her
“Oh Trin, your hair is a mess,” Trinity ran her fingers through her messy baby hairs.
“Something’s wrong with the car, ur dads getting himself riled up” trinity glances at her dad. His hands were ripping at his hair, face frustrated. Great, he was in one of his moods. Her brother woke up in his car seat next to her.
“I’m hungry” he whined, Trinity handed him crackers.
The only thing around them was a farmhouse across a long field. A red barn nearby. A long circled fence held in animals.
“Mom there’s cows!” Trinity pointed fruitlessly out the window.
Her mom didn’t notice, or if she did she didn’t care. She was trying to talk to her dad through her rolled down window.
“We are gonna get heatstroke out here Kate!”
“Can’t we just call somebody?”
“I already tried the tow truck place is hours away, said they cant help us today”
“You guys stuck?”
Trinity jumps when she finds a boy at her window. He had a red wheelbarrow with soil in it. He looked sun tanned, sweating through his clothes she noticed with disgust. His eyes were bright blue, she could tell even while he was squinting from the sun. She couldn’t tell how old he was, definitely older than her though.
“Something's wrong with our car, you don’t happen to know a towing company nearby do you?” The boy placed the wheelbarrow down completely, swiping his brow.
“No sir,” she was watching him so intently that he must have felt her gaze.
As soon as his eyes bore down into hers she ducked away from the window.
“How long have you guys been on the road”
“A few hours” her mom comments.
“My family’s got an extra room if you need it” Trinity's mom got out of the car.
“Oh my goodness that would be amazing”
“That’s a big offer, are you sure your parents are gonna be okay with that?” Her dad questioned, Trinity trolled her eyes. The boy shrugged before he picked up his stuff again. Making his way toward the house. “Come on Cameron!” Her dad said, hauling him out of his car seat.
Trinity ran out of the car when her parents started to follow him. Suddenly feeling left behind. The walk to the main building was long and hot. The dress her mother made her wear rubbed uncomfortably.
Outside the front porch there was a wide range of trees. Just before the tree line there was a group of boys all seemingly different ages.
There was a smaller one on the ground, clothing dusted in grime. She stood there as her parents walked into the house.
The boy tried to get up, only getting shoved back before his brothers ran off laughing. He stood up once they were gone, wiping his scratched hands against his shirt.
That’s when his eyes met hers.
He turned away in embarrassment after noticing her presence. When she entered the house her dad was fighting with Cameron. Making impact noises you’d hear in cartoons as he playfully fought him. He seemed to be in an okay mood now, at least there was that.
Her lips pursed. Eyes instinctively looking for her mother. She found her chatting with a couple. The man was tall, he had light brown hair, some grey hairs showing. His eyes were serious. She moved on quickly. The woman looked slightly younger, her eyes blue and lively. Her hair light blond. She had deep smile lines as she chatted with her mother.
She sneaked next to her moms legs, leaning her weight onto her. Her mother just continued to animatedly talk with the couple. It wasn't until Trinity called her name that she noticed her.
“Oh honey where have you been?” She spoke bringing Trinity out from behind her legs and in front of the adults like she was in a showcase. She felt fingers run through her messy hair as she spoke,
“This is my daughter Trinity" She looks down to her
“The Whitakers are letting us stay the night so we can wait for the tow truck.”
Trinity didn’t know what to say to that. She would be stuck in a house full of boys. She heard her father and brother come up from behind her still acting foolish. That’s when her mother placed her hands on her shoulders and asked.
“What do you say Trinity?"
She was surprised by this, she shot her brother a look now noticing that they were all quiet and watching her. She felt the pressure of the two new adults glaring into her.
“Thanks” She flushed looking at the floorboards. Her fingers scrunched the skirt of her dress.
She knew Cameron didn’t have to say thanks, how humiliating.
“Oh you're just adorable aren’t you?” The blond haired woman chuckled. She bent down to her level face suddenly close.
“How about I introduce you to my boys, it's been a while since they had any friends around here.” The woman stood and tried lending a hand. Trinity pretended not to notice.
“Cameron, go on,” her mother said. Her brother took clumsy steps after her, grimy hands quickly reaching to hold onto her hand.
The adults chattered away behind her as the woman opened one of the back doors of the house. The sun shone heavily on them as soon as they left the room. It was much greener out here, a fact Trinity couldn’t help but notice. The clouds were gigantic, she felt like she was in a video game.
“Boys get over here!”
The first one that had listened could’ve been around the same age as Trinity. It was the boy who she had seen being pushed to the ground earlier. He was only slightly taller than her though.
“Denny, where's your brothers?” The boy shrugged, not even attempting to search for them. Just beyond the fence there was laughter. A boy was seen playing with sticks, hitting them against a large willow tree. Cameron hung onto her hand and swayed back and forth.
“Charlie, Dean get over here!” The woman screamed.
“This is Denny, Dean and Charlie. I believe you're the same age as Denny darling” The woman spoke to Trinity.
“Boys, this is Trinity and Cameron, they are going to stay with us.”
“For how long?” Charlie asked.
“Their car has to get towed” apparently that was enough since the boys understood immediately.
“Oh and the Oliver is the one that invited you in earlier but he’s busy”
“Well go on and play” the woman went back inside. Trinity gave the boys an uncomfortable look.
Making eye contact with Denny. She noticed the same exact eye color that his mother had. She wondered why he was the only one that got that trait.
“You wanna go look at a mud pit?” Dean asked.
He was taller than both the other boys there but there was something that told her he was younger than Charlie. She agreed, the three boys led them to an area closer to the trees.
When they got there all Trinity would notice was that the “Mud Pit” looked to be more like a pond full of algae. It was so shallow all there was was just sludge and mud. Before she could question them Charlie had already stepped closer. He was poking his stick into the water. Like he was digging for something.
“Oh shit I got one!” Before anyone else could react, Dean had already gotten there. Shoving his brother face first into the mud, his hands reaching for the frog eggs.
The boy fell with a slap into the mud. He jumped up fast, scrubbing the gunk away from his eyes and mouth so he could breathe.
Cameron let out a giggle beside her, hand still clutching hers.
“You dick! Finders keepers” he launched a thick mud ball at Dean.
The mud was sticky, clinging to his shirt.
Trinity tried to step back with Cameron, avoiding the sudden mud fight. She bumped into the youngest boy. There was mud everywhere. One throw of an arm was all it took for her and Denny to get covered.
Trinity’s mouth dropped, eyes squeezed shut. She scrubbed the mud away frustrated. Anger boiling in her gut.
Denny wiped his face with his shirt, disgusted but obviously more used to this behavior. The next thing she heard made her stomach drop.
Cameron started to wail. His hand had left hers already. Fruitlessly wiping at the mud that had completely landed on his face.
She leant down to look using her skirt to rub away the gunk to see. There was a redness in his face from the force of the throw.
Her eyes wandered back to the two boys, still completely oblivious to what they had done. Without a second moment she moved Cameron away from the pit.
She leant down, scooping up mud with both hands. She got closer to the culprit.
“Hey!” She spoke loudly. She got the boy's attention quickly.
Both turned to look at her with happy clueless smiles. That’s when she struck.
She jumped at Dean. Full body weight pushing over him. Her hands swiftly covered over his face. He squirmed on the way down. As they went into the pond she held her hands there. It wasn't until she realized that he couldn’t breathe that she stopped.
He was crying but she didn’t find it in her to care. She stood up. The dress was completely ruined.
Charlie was wide eyed, staring at her with a fear that she knew would stick. As she made her way back to her brother she found that he wasn’t crying anymore. His eyes were watery, still unhappy but when she got close he fell in line with her.
Footsteps followed after them causing her anger to flare up again. She turned around fully expecting to have to fight another one. She found Denny standing there, blue eyes wide, something else glowing in his expression that she couldn’t make sense of.
“You didn't have to hit him so hard"
She scoffs, ”He hit my brother”
“Well, yeah, but that’s normal”
She gives him a look “For you maybe”
“What?”
Trinity sighs, “Nothing”
“it was just a mud ball”
“He’s five!”
“They didn’t mean to”
Her pace gets faster, keeping Cameron close.
“Just because you deal with their shit doesn’t mean we have to.”
Denny goes silent for a minute, his eyes faced down.
“My moms gonna be mad when she hears”
She glares at the stains in her dress
“…mine too”
They took off their shoes before entering the house, deciding that it wouldn’t make their situation any better. The look in her mothers eyes when she saw Cameron doesn't even compare to when she sees her dress.
“What did you do to your dress?!” She whispers harshly to her, seemingly not wanting the adults to hear. Trinity doesn’t say anything.
Cameron lets go of her hand and runs to their mom.
“You were supposed to watch him!”
“I was-“
“Clearly you weren’t. Look at this mess”
Trinity can’t help but think about how much time she had spent being reprimanded by her parents about something that wasn't in her control. As her mom took Cameron to the other side of the room to clean off his face Trinity stayed by the doorway, feeling dirty and ashamed.
Her father stood near the fridge. His arms crossed and gave her a look that could be understood as scolding. Trinity’s body stiffened. She turned away so she was facing her mom. She waited till she was done.
Her mom pulled out a spare dress. Blue this time. Edges trimmed in lace. Her mother apologized for her behavior to Mary’s husband.
She seemed so embarrassed at the idea of her kids making a mess. She didn’t even make a comment about the redness in Cameron’s face. There was no sign of her even noticing it. Trinity went to Cameron in the meantime. He was sitting on a stool looking dejected. She spoke in a quiet voice.
“Ayos lang ba 'yang mukha mo?”
She asked “Is your face okay?”
His face lit up a bit at the Tagalog, Trinity knew it would cheer him up.
Before he could respond her mom was already taking her down the hall.
She was fuming when the bathroom door closed. Shaking her head, brows furrowed.
”You're an athlete Trinity you can't present yourself like this”
Trinity had to hold herself back from rolling her eyes. Everything always tied back to her gymnastics.
When her mother tugs her dress up over her head mud clung to her. She stepped in the shower and quickly rinsed off. Her uncomfortably long hair getting in the way. Her muddied dress had disappeared when she got out.
She slipped on her new dress, almost identical to the last.
She let out a groan feeling the constriction come back. She stayed in the bathroom for a moment trying to stretch out the seams of the dress before giving up. Her steps were uneasy as she made her way back to the main room. The kitchen had sandwiches on the counter.
All four boys sat at the table. Squeaky clean. She wondered how, since she hadn’t seen another bathroom in the house.
She was expecting her mother to jump out at her for attacking that boy. Surprisingly there wasn't anything. She didn't find her father in the room but her mother was feeding Cameron some of her sandwich.
She eyed Dean. He avoided her gaze, eyes still brimmed red. She took a seat.
The sandwich was strange, a type of ham with crumbles of corn and mayonnaise. She started to force it down, deciding that she couldn’t possibly survive another round of her mothers wrath.
Denny was sitting next to her, his legs swinging back and forth below the table. Silent and absolutely gorging down his sandwich. As soon as he finished he started to stand.
She nudged his leg before he could, passing on her half eaten sandwich. His eyes dart up to hers
“you don’t—“ she efficiently kicks his leg under the table.
“Ow!”
Mary appears out of nowhere
“Dean! Stop kicking your brother!” Dean’s eyes widened.
“I wasn’t!”
She looked back at Denny with wide eyes. Be quiet. Denny gave her a hesitant look before accepting the sandwich. The table was being cleaned off when Trinity made her escape. Denny caught up with her.
“Why’d you do that?”
“Do what?”
“You kicked me”
“I didn’t want my mom to know”
“Why?”
“Just didn’t”
Trinity had nothing to do.
“Wanna watch tv?”
“My mom doesn't let us.”
Trinity let out a groan.
“We can listen to the radio though”
As soon as the radio hummed to life, Trinity knew it would be a bore.
“Your new dress is nice,” he said, interrupting the chatter.
“I hate it”
“Why?”
“My mom makes me wear them. She says I have to be more girly.”
“You don’t wanna be girly?"
All she did was give him a look that said “Are you serious?”
They were quiet for a moment, the hum of the radio washing over them.
“You want some of my clothes?”
“What?”
He didn't repeat himself, just stared.
She searched his face for any sign he was joking but she found nothing.
She hesitantly nodded.
He led her to a room that seemed far too messy to sleep in. Two beds, clothes piled everywhere. One bed didn't even seem to have sheets on it. There were toys everywhere.
She almost slipped on a toy truck. She couldn’t imagine coming to this room after a long day. She imagined Denny trying to escape everyone and not being able to.
“You sleep here?”
“Yeah”
His tone was more shut down, Trinity moved on.
She just stood patiently in the mess as he rummaged through a drawer.
“Are these good?” He held out some shorts to her. She took them.
“These yours?”
Denny hums.
“Maybe”
He continues to search for a shirt. Trinity inspected the navy shorts, bringing them to her waist to measure.
“Oh this one's good, from the apple orchard last year.” He handed her the shirt. The front of it has a design of a tree. A large apple being the main focus. The name of the orchard in large blocky yellow letters. She honestly didn't care anymore, as long as it didn't have frills or bows on it.
“Thanks”
“You can change in here” He didn't make any moves to leave the room. She gave him a look. He leaned on the floor by the bed, the one with dirty socks on it looking like he was going to look for something under it.
“You gonna watch?”
“Huh?” He questioned, now looking under the bed. She gave him this long look when he came up. The realization seemed to hit him the moment his eyes fell onto her dress again.
His face seemed to slowly glow red. His limbs were stiff. Letting out a brief apology on his way out.
She slipped on the shirt first, it seemed to be a bit big, but she didn't care. As long as it was loose. Unlike her dress she could actually breathe with it on. The shorts were a little different. Elastic stretched out too much. She did a small jump for a test. Thankful no one was in the room when they fell down her legs completely. She exited the room with her hands holding up her shorts.
Embarrassed about having to go to Denny like that. He was leant against the wall, arms behind his back. She could tell he quickly spotted the problem.
“Ohh let me a get a shoelace”
”What?” She watched him crazily zoom past her back into his room. Rummaging yet again under a bed. He came back with a discolored lace. She backed away from him when he stepped closer.
“That won't work”
“Yea it will, like a belt”
She absently moved her shirt out of the way as he looped the string around her hips.
She had never heard of anyone using a shoelace for anything other than shoes. Surprisingly it worked well. The shorts didn’t slip and the knot in the front wasn't too tight.
She went to look in a mirror, Denny following after her. The oversized clothing stood out a bit. The apple orchard logo was bright. She looked like she was playing dress up. For some reason she enjoyed this look more than any dress or competition uniform she'd ever worn.
“I look like Huckleberry,”
He didn't reply to her comment just said,
“You look better like this,” Trinity nodded in agreement. Her dress was rumpled in her hands. She let out a breath.
“Can we do something else?”
“Outside?”
“And do what?
Denny gives her a shrug.
“Anything”
They ended up outside in the blazing heat. He motioned her to follow him around one of their barns. When she got to the door she found cows in the grass. Several, eating or sleeping. She had never been so close to one before.
“Do you wanna help me feed them?”
“Sure” He came back with the kind of bottle they give to babies.
“Here” he handed it over.
“Just sit down here and I'll get her.” Nerves prickled at her mind. She had never done this before. She wouldn’t know what to do. She watched him as he found his target, gently picking up the animal.
There was no unease in his movements. He was used to handling them.
He plopped the baby into her lap. Its long limbs were knobby, its fur soft. Its eyes were wide, ears floppy. She awed at the creature, never having one so close before. “Her name's Ruby, Oliver named her.”
“You feed her every day?”
“Well yeah” He takes a hold of the bottle but it doesn’t leave her grip.
“Here you place it gently near her mouth until she grabs on.” She placed the top of the bottle into the calf’s mouth. It took a moment for the calf to catch up, almost like it knew it wasn’t Denny feeding her.
“It’s kind of the worse chore to be put on, I don’t mind though”
“Why can’t she just feed from her mom?”
“She came out too early. Not strong enough yet” Trinity nodded, her eyes not leaving Ruby. After the bottle was empty they sat in the hay a bit longer. Ruby lifted from her lap clumsily. Denny then said that it was time for the adults. They both carried one bag each, pouring the grain into the feeding trough outside of the barn.
She watches as the cows came from the field. Quickly falling into their routine. It was so peaceful Trinity couldn’t help but wonder how long it had been since she had felt that way.
They went for a brief walk after, looking for something to do.
“Jeez what else do you even do around here?” She could hear the chatter of her parents on the porch. She looked over her shoulder accidentally making eye contact with her dad. His gaze curious, she turns away quickly.
“We could race?”
“To where?”
“That tree over there” he points to a tree in the distance.
They started a countdown, she made sure her shorts were tightened with her shoelace. Readying herself. She was not going to lose to a boy especially while her parents were watching. It was over in a flash. Trinity had won but that was to be expected.
“How are you so fast?”
“I do gymnastics”
“Does that mean you can do flips?”
“Yeah”
“Can you teach me how to do one?”
His incessant questions were a lot. She still agreed. She modeled a front handspring, thankful for the shorts.
She spotted him at the beginning, holding up his abdomen because he was nervous. He landed on his knees, Trinity winced at the noise. It wasn't until he tripped and almost face planted that they decided to give up.
“It’s amazing, you can just do that whenever”
Trinity didn't look at him when he said this, only humming in response.
“Trinity!” She heard a voice scream. She internally coiled. Her mom was calling her. No dress was in sight. She gave Denny a look. They approached the house cautiously, Denny following her for unknown reasons.
When her mom caught her form from far away all Trinity could do was stare at the ground. She knew what she would say. Would her mom embarrass her while Denny was here? When the two kids were only a few feet away from her the first words caught.
“Trinity Santos. What are you wearing?” It was spoken with a deeper tone of voice, strained and angry.
“Denny let me borrow them”
“You don't even look like my child anymore.” Her mom scrubbed her face.
“Go get your dress now—“
Trinity’s eyes filled with tears. Denny was silent beside her, she could tell that he didn’t know what to do.
“Dinners ready guys” Mary came from nowhere, her mother froze.
“Denny, come wash up” he nodded, giving Trinity one last look. Trinity slipped past her mom quickly going to the dining room to sit down.
Her mom couldn’t scream at her in front of everyone. That would be too humiliating. Almost everyone was seated, it was different from lunch. She wasn't sitting next to Denny tonight.
She didn’t know why the thought disappointed her. One side of the table sat Cameron and her dad. Before she could take a seat she noticed Dean out of the her corner of her eye. He was scooping mashed potatoes onto his plate but his eyes were on her.
“Are those my shorts?” His brows furrowed.
“No,” she said. Slipping into a seat next to Cameron to get her legs out of view.
How embarrassing. Her mother served Cameron while the Whitaker parents told a story that she wasn't focused on. She focused on her food. Taking a big bite when her mother pushes her chest back.
“Sit up,” Trinity follows the orders. The woman looked towards her lap.
“What have I told you?” Trinity avoids her gaze. Grabbing her napkin and placing it in her lap. Denny swings his legs, the table moving. Charlie pinches his arm to stop. Denny slaps him away and rubs the spot.
The chatter overlaps in her head. Stories of their runs into town. A cow had escaped through the fence. Denny interrupted to add a part that they had forgotten. She pretended not to notice how no one corrected his behavior.
Dean was still sulking in his embarrassment. Just pushing food around, avoiding her gaze while chewing noisily.
Trinity noticed her mothers nose crinkle at the action. Her fathers voice cuts through.
“The tow truck should be here tomorrow afternoon.” Trinity froze. Other conversations continue. Someone replies, a laugh. The bite full of food on her fork slid off.
They were leaving tomorrow? That was so soon.
Her mouth opens to reply. To say anything. She gave up. Her eyes darted to Denny who was already looking at her. An expression in his face that she quickly looked away from.
******
That night Trinity heard a movement from her door. She turned onto her other side. Spotting a figure looking in through the crack in the door. Her heart dropped.
“Trinity” the voice hushedly whispered. She sits up, her brother rolling into her from his side of the bed.
“Denny what the heck are you doing?” He scared the hell out of her.
“Let’s see the fireflies.” She gave a look to where her parents were sleeping. Cameron shuffled in his sleep but no one was awake. She slid on her shoes, following him out of her room. Carefully shutting the door behind her.
“Are you crazy? I was sleeping”
“You gotta see this” when they made it to the stairs he whispered
“You have to follow where my feet go. One creak will wake up my parents.” She nodded, a bit lost on how he could manage without noise. His steps down were uneven and twisted.
A first step on the far left, the next fully skipping a step. She followed him clumsily.
It wasn't until her heel dug a little too deep into one side of the plank that there was noise.
They froze. Heartbeats in their throats. Denny placed his ear to the wall. Listening for something.
Their breaths and the crickets were the only noise around them. They continued. When they finally made it outside Trinity only saw a few fireflies.
She only noticed then that there was a jar in Denny's hands, holes poked through the top. The grass left itchy cuts on her legs as they trumped through the field. She was cranky from being woken up. The chill of the night didn't help her. It wasn’t until they approached the barn that she hesitated. It was a much deeper color in the dark.
Barn doors slightly agar. If she stared at it long enough she could see a figure standing inside.
She stopped. He placed his hand on her arm, willing her forward. She shrugged him off but followed. To her surprise they went where a ladder stood. He tucked the jar into his pocket.
“Be careful with splinters” is all he says when he starts to climb. When they are at the top all she can focus on is the smell of hay.
“What are we doing up—“ he interrupts her with a point towards a large open window. She placed her hands on the edge as she leaned out.
A large tree sat far away, taller than all the others. And in the leaves there was twinkles of lights. Light green and so bright. It flickered back and forth in the moonlight.
“Why are they staying in the tree?” Denny shrugged. They leaned on the opening, shoulder to shoulder. They let the silence surround them.
“Do you wanna catch some?” Trinity asked, her head turning towards him. He agreed, both speedily climbing down the ladder. They rammed into the barn doors. Running far as giggles caught them. Dew catching onto their shoes.
He suddenly slowed, breath heaving.
She looked back towards him before grasping onto his arm. Bringing him forward with her to where the tall tree stood.
Denny opened the jar, in preparation. The lights flew around them, buzzing with life. Trinity cupped one in her hand watching as it glowed over her palms. She shook it into the jar.
She watched Denny jump towards one, missing completely.
He turned back around, a glow on his face. She laughed at him, hands covering mouth. He caught it and added it to their jar. By the time they were done their jar glowed like a dim lamp. Bright considering the dark. They let them loose before turning back for bed. Limbs staggering and uneven while climbing back upstairs. When Trinity drifted off, scratchy from grass and hot from the running, she could only think of the green lights.
******
Trinity woke with something pushing against her face. She pulls it away to find Cameron's foot. She groans, shoving it away from her. He had completely turned around in the night. Her parents were already out of bed, nowhere to be found.
The smell of breakfast seeped through the house. She nudged Cameron up. They both got up sluggish from the air mattress. She got ready for the day before going downstairs. Deciding that she would wear a dress for a peaceful morning. The dads are in the living room when they arrive.
“Morning, leftovers on the table.” Her dad spoke. She was surprised that she had slept in so long. Considering the late night firefly catching, she guessed it wasn’t that surprising.
She took some pancakes in hand without syrup and went outside. Her mom was on the porch with a glass of lemonade. Looking much more tired than before.
She was still chattering with Mary, loud and preformative. She found Denny digging a stick into the dirt, making squiggles.
“Looking for gold?”
he turned to her voice. Pursing his lips, eyes narrowed at her words. She found herself forgetting that her mother could be watching.
“Should we look for frog eggs?”
“Nah can’t get mud on my dress again. Wanna press flowers?” He looked a little confused by her words.
“You know when you smush flower petals and keep them?”
“Ohh, okay” they went all around the field looking for different kinds. Only stopping when there was a bunch in one area.
“Why does your mom do that?”
“Do what?”
“I don’t know, she just— treats you differently I guess.”
“Yeah, why do you think I'm wearing a dress again today?”
“you have to?”
“I guess I wore boy's clothes when I was younger, she didn’t like that.”
“If you want you can take some clothes with you”
“Really?”
“Yeah”
”I’ll make sure they aren’t Deans”
She shoves his shoulder.
”You knew!?”
”No, he just mentioned it." He was smiling down at the flowers.
They went into the house to find heavy books. They found an old biology book on a shelf, heavy and old.
They placed the different flowers in, placing the stems strategically. It wasn't until they put the book back on the shelf that Denny realized something.
“But you won't be here to see them finished.”
Trinity didn't say anything.
The afternoon was as boring as listening to the radio.
More sandwiches were passed to them for lunch. Trinity was grateful it seemed to have different ingredients.
There was a table set up outside. The parents sat on the porch, the kids sat ostracized from them.
Dean sat across from her much to her dismay. Denny next to her and Charlie on her other side. Oliver was missing. Denny and Trinity spoke between them, almost ignoring the other two's presence.
A buzzing flies through the air. Swiftly the carpenter bee lands on the sandwich in Charlie’s hands.
His eyes widened, mouth full of food opening. He doesn’t scream but he jumps up.
Throwing his sandwich onto the grass.
Trinity pauses, eyes darting to Denny. A look passed between them but nothing was said. When Charlie comes back with another sandwich he pretends nothing happened. Dean surprisingly didn’t mention it.
Trinity started lightly at first.
“Bzzzz” so softly it was barely even heard. Then from next to her she hears just a little louder,
“Bzzz” Denny is biting back a smile as his brother's eyes flew up. They stop. Wait a moment, then continue.
“Cut it out!” Charlie snapped.
It wasn't until Dean shouted in dramatics “Look out!” Pointing next to his brother. Charlie jumps out of the chair. Face reddened as realization hits and he let out a loud groan, leaving the table to go back inside.
The puttering of laughter escaped Denny and Trinity simultaneously, first chokingly and then breaking fully as they watch Charlie go back inside.
Trinity slides down into her chair feeling her head lighten. The laughter quiets. Voice breaking through,
She had fallen into their chaotic routine so easily it shocked her. The dread of the day doesn't seem to fully hit until her dad calls for her,
“Tow trucks here, go pack up” Trinity felt nausea form in her. She went to her guest room. As she rearranged her things back into her bag the door opened.
Denny was in the doorway, already making his way closer.
In his arms were clothing. All unfolded and some almost fell out of his grasp.
Her eyes darted to him. He didn't return her gaze. Eyes pointed downward.
If she had looked a little longer maybe she would have seen the glossiness in them. He dropped the pile to her air mattress.
Standing back up straight his hands picked at each other. Trinity just watched. He was trying to say something.
“These will last you a while. hope your mom doesn't get too mad”
Denny always seemed to be worrying about others. Even now when he could get in trouble for giving away clothes he only thought about how her mom would react.
“Thanks” then she says,
“Dont let them push you around”
He bit his cheek.
She hesitates then grabs the book next to the bed. She scribbles something on the back cover. Swiftly tearing out an uneven corner.
“This is where I live” Denny took the paper absentmindedly.
It hurt Trinity knowing that he would probably never visit.
There was a knock on the door.
”Ready to go?” Her mom asks, going towards the rest of her family’s already packed bags. Trinity nodded, stuffing everything chaotically into her bag before her mom could get a good look.
She carried her and Cameron’s bags downstairs. Silently taking in the house that she would never walk into again. She thinks about what their hotel would look like. She knows she will be bored in comparison.
Cameron runs to her legs when she gets down, taking his bag and dragging it on the ground. Everyone was on the porch. They insisted on walking them out, some of the boys groaning when their mother made them.
Trinity's steps got faster and faster the more she took in the space around her. Like she couldn’t bear to look at the farm any longer. The tow truck is there, a man talking with her father. Dennys dad had agreed to give them a ride to auto shop.
It was time to say their goodbyes.
Denny's mom comes to her first. She places her hand on top of her head, ruffling her hair.
“Thanks for staying with us” Trinity feels emotions bubble in her throat. She nuzzles into the hand subconsciously.
Mary tells the boys to come over. Oliver comes over first. Saying goodbye briskly to everyone before making his escape. The other three stand in front of her. Dean and Charlie don’t attempt to say anything.
Their mothers hug behind them. Mary says goodbye to Cameron. The fathers chattering away in the background. Standing uncomfortably, she wants this moment to be over. Dean gives Denny a curious look.
“Aren’t you gonna say goodbye to your girlfriend?” Denny flushes completely. Giving Dean an incredulous look. It isn’t until Dean made kissy noises that Denny kicks him. Dean shouts, a full fight about to start when Denny's dad stops them.
There was a painful ache in her throat.
She brushed off the sudden sting in her eyes.
Trinity stumbled with her bag, escaping the view of the family. She flung her bag in the unfamiliar car over Cameron’s car seat. He was there asking to be picked up. She placed him in as she refrained from looking back.
It was only a day. There was no need to overthink it. Everything would go back to normal like it always should have. The idea of forgetting hurt far worse than leaving. They all get into the car, ready to leave. Trinity couldn’t help herself when she looked out the window one last time. A red barn sits in the distance, cows around the fence. The farm house sat in the green grass. The large tree with no firefly’s. The mud pit where everything had begun.
Denny's figure standing as his family waved. His usual curious look now gone, replaced with disappointment.
Her hands crumpled her dress.
This would be the last time. She had to accept that this was it.
Her head started craning to keep her eyes on them.
When her mother scolds her for bad posture she sits back into her spot. Her eyes look out the window, nothing to see but nature. Later, as she drifts to sleep listening to her brother babble nonsense, she dreams of a farm with a family that seemed a little too different from her own.
Pittsburgh, 2025
Trinity was ready to be done with her internship yet it hadn’t even truly begun. She watched the new med students fumble, and honestly got on her nerves.
She had to drain a med student's fingernail later after he crushed it while moving a patient. They spoke briefly, she assured him that she would “stop before I hit the nail bed, I hope.” He made a specific face at this, something very similar to what Denny would do. She took that thought right out of her mind before it could really form. The man—Dennis—was looking at which patient to take next.
“You’re supposed to take them in the order they arrive” She said, eyes still focused on her work.
“Yeah I know how it works”
After some conversation he insists he doesn't need an easy patient.
Her words leave her a little too naturally
”Suit yourself, Huckleberry”
He pauses at her words for minute,
Something clicks.
She isn’t fully sure until their eyes connect again.
She opens her mouth like she was going to say something before leaving him there.
Later after inviting Dennis to live with her. They awkwardly drove to her apartment. She told him where his room was, too tired to give a tour.
They heated up a frozen pizza and they ate with a random movie playing, too exhausted from the day to talk. They were going to their own rooms for bed when she said goodnight. She mumbled out a soft,
“Night Denny” voice already out of it.
She went into her room, shutting the door. He froze at her words before stumbling to bed.