Work Text:
“Avery, what on earth are you doing?” Derek asked as he walked into their small bedroom with Popeyes value meals. Derek got a delicious five dollar chicken sandwich and the five dollar two sides deal, and he got Avery the three piece tenders with the two sides deal…with more mash potatoes with gravy since Avery is…quite a nightmare without enough potatoes. Avery was in his room on his monitor.
Two monitors belonged to Avery, one monitor was on a google doc, and the other monitor was on images of missionary pictures, all in the same company friendly art style. Derek didn’t know exactly what to do at that very moment. He closed his yellow eye on instinct, something he usually does to piss on Hastur but he actually didn’t know what to do at that very moment. Avery stared at him horrified as he hovered his hands over the keyboard. Derek looked closer at the monitor and noticed he was writing a short story about a new anime called, “I’m the basic college boy at college with no colored hair and somehow bagged the baddiest Gal ever?!”. It was a corny anime, in fact he and Avery don’t know why they watch it every Sunday when a new episode comes out, but they do. Though instead of the story being about the Gal (Hiyori Kureha) and the basic college boy (Souta Kiyomizu) being the plot line for Avery, it was instead college boy and the gal’s COUSIN??!!! (Daigo Takahashi).
“Are you writing about that anime?!” Derek said and marched over to look closer, that’s when Avery’s senses came back and he immediately tried to cover his screen, but it was too late. Derek saw the page. The whole kinky page where Daigo was the bottom and Souta was learning how to top. It was horribly written on the sex part, mainly because Avery was the biggest virgin around and he was proud of that title. Though if you are a virgin, you are meant to taint your search history with body facts so that way you aren’t posted to Twitter dot com about how bad of anatomy you are. Derek pulled a chair closer and started to read closely.
“Oh my god”
“Derek—“
“You know nothing of anatomy,” he said as he kept scrolling. Avery clutched his pearls when he said that. Derek selected the paragraph and deleted it, making Avery scream.
“MY PARAGRAPH!” He said as he stared, Derek cracked his knuckles and began to type vigorously. Avery watched him go, Derek knew nothing of sex either, but thanks to that infinite knowledge he knew enough to write a story. Avery leaned close to watch him go. Derek opened the other eye so he can actually use his knowledge, which made Hastur come out of his head.
“Yo what the fuck are you writing” he said as he stared at the laptop, but Derek was too much into the zone. Avery leaned closer to Derek’s ear.
“Make Souta kiss his forehead, I want good intimacy points,” he whispered, Derek raised an eyebrow as he glanced over at him.
“What do you know about intimacy?” He asked bluntly, Avery clutched his pearls again.
“I’m out” Hastur said and left, taking a fry with him. Avery watched the fry float away.
“I know that rewriting my smut fanfiction is pretty intimate!” Avery argued.
“That’s my boy” Hastur said and left the room, Derek made a face but continued to write.
“You can’t write sex to save your life,” he said, “it would be more realistic to say you spun around on his penis than what you wrote,” he said, Avery’s jaw dropped. Derek continued to write, the worst part is that he was actually good at writing the smut, he was both realistic about it but kept it still fantasy-like so people on archive our own omega don’t lose their minds about it, because who wants to know about sex facts when reading?
Avery watched him write quietly after that, but then whispered again, “it’s missionary, can you make Daigo hold onto him like a star fish or something?” He asked, Derek had to hold his laugh. He did write that in. “How are you good at writing sex? Was it actually true you did have a pimp-line behind the nightclub?” He asked, the hell did Avery mean by actually?!
“Where did you get that from?!” Derek asked confused and actually baffled.
“The grapevine,” Avery said as he put his legs to his chest.
“You think I have time for my barista job, game activities and…pimping??” He asked, Avery paused for a moment and started to think, you could almost see the smoke coming out of his head.
“Timezones bro,” he answered, there was a light silence between the two for a moment.
“Yo let me be visible for one moment, he might actually need this knowledge,” Hastur said while doing the peace sign, Derek chose to ignore him and close his yellow eye again. Avery reached into the Popeyes bed and began to eat his food. He smiled when he saw the amount of potatoes he had. Then he grabbed Derek’s food and placed it next to him, but Derek’s hands were busy so Avery just chose to feed him. Derek calmly took bites from the sandwich as he kept typing. Avery smiled and ate his tenders calmly.
“These tenders are so tender on the inside, that chef must’ve gotten some good head last night” Avery said as he kept eating, Derek’s face contorted quietly.
“Son </3” Hastur said from behind.
“Just eat, Avery…” Derek said and patted his head slowly. Derek kept writing and listening to Avery requests on the side, soon enough they were full and the fix was finished.
“There, a proper fic,” Derek said as he cracked his knuckles again, Avery blinked and cheered as he looked at his computer the opened up Ao3 happily to post it.
“Thank you, Derek!!” He cheered as he paused at the tags. Derek looked over and sighed.
“Don’t put that damn “I don’t know tags” tag, I’ll help you.” He said and started to type those out to.