Chapter Text
I can feel it coming back again
Like a rolling thunder chasing the wind
Forces pulling from the center of the Earth again
I can feel it
“Hey.”
“Hey.”
He stood perpendicular to the door, as if he was already turning to leave when she answered his knock. The thought tightened the knot of guilt in her gut.
“Come in,” she motioned, playing it cool even as she heard him exhale sharply upon entry.
“How you doing?”
She hoped it came off curious, not judgmental, but as Ava loved to remind her social interactions with other humans wasn’t her specialty. That she felt so unsure of her footing with the man before her now, after everything they’d been through, hurt almost as much as the memory of their fight.
“Well, the unis are taking Lucia to the precinct now.”
“Oh God, I’m sorry–”
She hoped to segue into all the other the things she felt sorry about, but her partner cut in.
“You don’t have anything to be sorry for. I’m sorry. You warned me. I should have listened. She’ll be charged with accessory after the fact.”
“Karadec…”
The way he was trying to keep it professional, to pack it all away like it was just another case, like he hadn’t just arrested his once fiancée and current girlfriend. All those plans, all that happiness and hope and then poof! Gone. She knew the feeling too well, felt it tighten its grip on her throat as she watched her partner spiral.
“Though with the other…cons that her and Charles were involved in, the charges will increase.”
She, not Lucia. Distancing language, because if he retreated far and fast enough, maybe he could outrun the hurt, the heartbreak.
“Adam…”
She tried again, stepped closer, took his hand, anything to keep him with her, in that moment. She already saw his walls creep back up, cold and strong, like ice… Conceal, don’t feel. Elliot’d gone through a mega Frozen phase once upon a time, thankfully the library had had a hard copy of the movie. After hundreds of rewatches, however, that line had always stuck with her. The idea that this woman with great power could be accepted fully by those she loved was definitely a Disney dream she could get behind too. Hopefully, she could get through to Karadec without ice piercing her heart though…
She watched, waited, and finally he sighed heavily, and his face dropped with his shoulders, as if he acknowledged the weight of recent events pulling him down.
The helpless shrug he gave did little to dislodge that heaviness of it either as he said, “I can’t believe this is happening.”
She nodded, but stayed quiet, hoping she looked some mix of encouraging/understanding which seemed to do the trick as he kept talking.
“Just cannot believe it. I feel so stupid.”
Oh, oh no, that wouldn’t cut it.
“No, don’t,” she shook her head, “Please don’t do that. You did it right.”
His look told her he wasn’t buying it, so she dared to push a little harder, praying he wouldn’t push her away in kind.
“You did. You opened your heart, you let her in. That’s always gonna be the right move.”
“I believed her. I believed she wanted a life with me. Now, I don’t even know who this person is–”
That feeling still gripped her throat, and it tightened, but she ignored it, forced her voice through it.
“Yes, you do,” she whispered, pulling him in for a hug, the ever running rapids of her mind amazed that he hugged her back as her arms wrapped around him.
“Yes, you do,” she continued, “You do, it’s the same person. You just…You just loved her too much to see the things you didn’t wanna see. It’s okay.”
He nudged his head deeper into the crook of her neck, and for once that feeling’s grip loosened on her throat. She wasn’t sure if her next words were for him or her, maybe both.
“It’s gonna be okay.”
She’s not sure how long they stood there, hugging in the middle of her messy living room, but she finally forced herself to pull away. There was another feeling now, an ache, a longing she’d long ignored rattling her rib cage like jail bars, but she wasn’t about to spring it loose after this tentative peace they’d reached, so instead…
“I get to go see Ava’s art show. You wanna come with me?”
“I would love to, but I have some things that I really need to take care of, you know.”
“Okay. But I’m here if you need me.”
The small sting of rejection she felt at his refusal was quickly replaced by that too familiar ache again as his hand lifted to brush away one of the tears that’d escaped her eyes.
“I know,” he acknowledged, his face pensive but open, still so wonderfully open.
“See ya,” he dismissed himself, giving her hand one last squeeze before she rested that hand on his back as they walked to her door.
She expected a quiet farewell, they’d certainly said plenty already, but Karadec surprised her as he exited but turned back on her porch.
“Show me pictures later? I know it’ll be amazing.”
She smirked, “Of course it will be, Ava’s a Gillory after all.”
“That she is,” he smirked back, “And, maybe text me when you get back home? With the Roman case getting so hot, I just–”
Normally, she’d let him keep digging, forever trying to find that balance between keeping her safe and honoring her independence. But after today…
“Okay, Dad, I’ll text you. But you gotta text me back when you get home, deal?”
He made a face she couldn’t identify, but nodded.
“Deal, so long as you never call me Dad again.”
She laughed, waving him off, “Stop wearing all those button-up shirts made for middle-aged men to hide their beer guts, and I’ll consider it. G’night, Karadec.”
“Night, Morgan.”