Chapter Text
Yuuri was standing in front of the mirror in his room looking disgusted. He could see the fat spilling out of his pyjama pants that was slightly tense around his hips. With his index and thumb, he pinched the fat rolling on his stomach. After giving up skating, he stopped caring about his weight. How much he was regretting it now.
He took a deep breath and climbed on the scale. Right before the small sound, Yuuri closed his eyes refusing to discover the truth. He slowing released his breath and opened an eye.
68,1kg.
He could have sworn that his heart stopped beating. He gained 19kg in six months. He knew that he gained weight easily, but it had never been that bad. How could he tell Victor?
Yuuri was certain that if Viktor knew how much of a fatass he was, the Russian would not stay a second longer in Japan. Perfect Viktor. Yuuri remembered how flawlessly the muscles were defined on his mentor’s body without an ounce of fat.
With his two hands, Yuuri grabs the fat pulling it upward. His hands were full. How repulsive. A disgusting taste climbed into Yuuri’s mouth. He needed to lose weight or it would be the end of his career.
Climbing down from the scale, he dressed up in his usual black training clothes. With revulsion he realized how close-fitted they were. He inhaled trying to tighten his stomach, but even then the sweater was stretched.
Yuuri walked toward his desk and turned on his computer. As soon as the starting noise was done, he clicked on the Safari icon. He searched “How to lose weight as fast as possible”. More than 10 000 results appeared. One by one, he clicked on them reading diagonally and taking mental notes. He, then, searched “how to lose 20kg as fast as possible”.
Suddenly, a voice downstairs yelled “Yuuri come here! Breakfast!” Yuuri jumped, startled. “Coming!” he replied. Quickly, he downloaded an app on his phone to help him calculate the calories he was eating. He was nearly at the door when he suddenly returned to his desk and erased his Internet history. No one, but him, needed to know how fat he was.
Downstairs, Viktor and his mother were happily chatting while she brought the breakfast. When he saw his student, Viktor smiled, his eyes sparkling with happiness.
“Little piglet! Come here. The food is delicious.”
Little piglet. How appropriate. Yuuri’s throat constricted with shame when hearing the nickname. Viktor was right he was a pig. ‘No, I am not a pig. Comparing me to a pig would be insulting to pigs.’ thought Yuuri. Nevertheless, he sat down next to Viktor. His mother was next to him in a second to give him breakfast, a bowl of rice with miso soup and a grilled fish. His stomach growled making Viktor laugh of his marvelous clear and rich laugh. Red-faced and ashamed, Yuuri bowed his head and started eating.
After a silent breakfast, Yuuri excused himself telling Viktor he was getting ready to go the ice rink and went in his bedroom. He took his phone and wrote down what he ate: one cup and a half of rice 363 calories, grilled salmon 180 calories, miso soup 50 calories for a total 593 calories. Looking at the outrageous number, Yuuri dropped his phone and ran to the bathroom. Locking the door, he kneeled beside the toilet and tried to make himself throw up. His face turned red and he was sweating, but nothing came out. “I am not even able to throw up. I am such a waste of space” silently cried Yuuri.
Hearing step in the stairs, Yuuri stood up and turned on the water and splashed some on his face. Viktor knocked on the door. “Ready to leave in five,” asked Viktor. Yuuri opened the door forcing a smile on his face and nodded. “Your face is red,” remarked his silver-haired coach. “I washed my face with water that was way too hot. I forgot the difference between the temperature here and in America,” answered Yuuri. “You’re such an idiot,” said Viktor smiling with amusement.
Seven minutes later, the two men were out of the inn and ready to go. Viktor took the bicycle and Yuuri was running in front of him. Yuuri, wanting to impress his new coach, ran as fast as he could toward to ice rink. It was a short run, but the fast pace was exhausting. At the Ice Castle, Yuuri wanted to collapse, but he did not want to embarrass himself in front of his idol. He tried to control his breath, but his shoulders were moving despite his efforts. With a twinkle in his eyes, Viktor exclaimed “Less in shape than you thought? No problem. We will start by that.” Yuuri released his breath ashamed that Viktor knew how much he let go since the Grand Prix Final.