Work Text:
Name: Seán William McLoughlin
Age: 26
Current Therapist: Dr. William S Jones
Symptoms: Memory loss, Insomnia, Identity Confusion, Blackouts, Depersonalization, Hallucinations, Derealization
Diagnosis: Dissociative Identity Disorder
Frosty air emanated from the small window, filling the square room with a cold chill. Dr. Jones was with his usual patient, he knew he had to be calm and understanding because of what the patient suffered through. From what the file said, Seán was experiencing dissociative identity disorder. The patient in question was sitting upright on his bed. His arms were constrained by the straight jacket he’d been forced into. His blue eyes were staring at his own reflection in the mirror on the opposite wall with an expression that could only be described as giddy. The expression put Dr Jones on edge, Seán rarely showed that kind of emotion when he was in here.
“You have to answer my questions. You’ve been here for three years. Am I speaking with Seán?” Dr. Jones asked, glancing up from his clipboard.
“There is no Seán. There is only Anti.” He said, rocking back and forth slowly, shaking his head a little as he spoke,
“Anti, where is Seán?” Dr. Jones asked, gripping the clipboard tight enough that his knuckles turned white.
“Seán is not real. There is only Anti.” He repeated in a teasing tone, giggling slightly toward the end. His expression suddenly changed and he looked up at the doctor helplessly.
“Where did I go?” Seán asked, the rocking stopped, the giddy look faded into Sean’s usual friendly expression.
“Seán? You’re in your room. You are perfectly safe here.” The doctor said calmly, his grip loosening. He leaned forward eagerly, Seán’s case was by far the most fascinating of all his patient
“W-Was he here?” Sean asked, he looked terrified at the very thought of Anti’s presence.
According to Dr Jones’ file, Anti showed up almost three years ago. At first Seán didn’t think anything of the small lapses in his memory or things seemingly moving themselves around the house until one day he blacked out completely. He has no memory of what he did that whole day and he woke up the next morning on the wrong side of the bed and his phone was unlocked. He picked up the phone and saw it was opened on a video of himself.
He pressed play and the video started off with static, he heard a small manic laugh and then suddenly his face appeared. It was his own face but it didn’t look anything like him, his eyes were pure black, his green hair seemed darker and he had his black gauges in. “I’m here .” The video flashed with static and images of Seán before going black.
From that day on, things were different in his life. He would get random nosebleeds before blacking out and waking up in a completely different location. Things he thought he knew he forgot, it wasn’t until things were getting violent that he sought help. It started small, waking up with dark stains on his shoes or hands that resembled dried blood. Seán assumed it was just because of his nosebleeds at first. Dr Jones remembered the day Seán told him about her and shuddered.
It was a month after the Anti appearances started. Seán had blacked out again and this time woken up in the middle of the night in a dark field. There was a wet knife in his hand and a dead girl at his feet. She must’ve been only sixteen years old. Seán panicked and ran, he went back the next evening to find the body still there. He buried the body deep in the forest and checked himself into the nearest mental facility. Dr Jones wasn’t his first therapist. Anti had scared off four other doctors before Dr Jones was handed the file. That was almost a year ago.
“Yes Seán. Anti was just here.” Dr Jones replied in a soothing tone.
“What did he say?” Seán asked in a small voice. It was obvious he feared Anti but his curiosity overwrote it.
“I don’t think you should know…” The Doctor said, looking down at his watch. He hardly ever told Seán the things Anti said, for fear it would upset the man even more. “Well it seems our time is up, I’ll see you at the same time tomorrow, Seán.”
“But.. you only just got here.” Seán said, more sad than anything, he knew if the doctor left he would be alone.
“We’ve been talking for an hour Seán.” The doctor explained patiently, he knew how confused Seán could get from time to time. Anti was the opposite, it seemed he always knew what Seán had said or done before his appearance. That was what made the case so interesting, Anti was the only recorded split personality with an awareness of what his other half did. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” With a polite nod the doctor left. The door buzzed and clicked when it shut. Seán was locked in the room once again.
“We’re...finally alone…” A voice said. Seán jumped and looked around but the room was still empty. He looked at the mirror and his stomach dropped at what he saw. His eyes were pitch black, his hair was no longer the faded green but a darker, more vibrant color. An unsettling grin was spread across his lips and his head was tilted to the side.
“W-Who are you?” Seán asked, backing into the corner of his bed, his reflection laughed but stayed in the same spot.
“Don’t you recognize me Seán?” Anti asked, the same unsettling grin on his face,
“A-Anti?” Seán asked, he was scared but couldn’t keep his eyes away, the reflection laughed wildly, entire body shaking and the mirror cracked around the edges.
“Hello...old friend….” Anti said softly with a menacing grin. “We’re finally meeting….isn’t that exciting.” He giggled, his hands over his mouth like a child caught doing something he shouldn’t be.
Seán winced and tried to move backwards but there was no more space on the bed.
Anti tilted his head and smiled excitedly. “You know...you can’t leave, why are you trying to run away from what’s in your head?”
“N-No! You’re not real!” Seán yelled, shaking his head frantically.
“If I’m not real…” Anti giggled. “Who killed those people?” Seán’s face paled in shock, no it wasn’t true, it couldn’t be.
“P-People? Y-You killed more than one?!” Seán’s eyes widened as he stared at the monster before him.
Anti laughed again and held up five fingers. He started listing names and pointing at each finger in turn, his smile growing wider with each name. “Millie George, Brandon McGregor, Angela Penfield, Ted Binion and Lucy Thompson, you met that one.”
Seán blinked away the memories of the poor girl’s dead form. “W-When did you kill them?!” He asked, his voice shook with fear.
“Not telling…” Anti teased in a singsongy voice.
“Why did you do it?” Seán asked, voice cracking.
“Because it was fun…” Anti responded with another giggle. “I like the sounds they make when I chase them. I like hunting for the next one…. always looking for the perfect victim.” He trailed off, retreating into his own mind. Seán closed his eyes and sighed, he tried his best to stay calm but something felt different, did he agree with him?
As if he could sense what Seán was thinking Anti suddenly started laughing again. “You feel it too.”
“No, no, no!” Seán said, shaking his head rather violently. “I’m nothing like you!” He yelled, fighting against the straight jacket.
Anti giggled, “You can’t deny it…” He sang. “You know what we are. You know what I’m saying is true. Come on, Seán. Life is more fun this way.” His voice was no longer the lilting tone of a madman, it had taken on a softer, more enticing sound.
Seán stopped resisting and looked back up at the mirror, “S-So what you’re saying is...is that it’s better to give up?”
Anti’s serious expression disappeared as suddenly as it had arrived and he was back to the menacing grin and the excited giggle. He nodded enthusiastically at Seán’s words.
“Yes! This life is better than the one you’ve been living, I can get you out of here.” Anti said, bouncing excitedly in his spot.
“Out of here to kill more people…” Seán murmured as if he wasn’t aware of his own actions.
“Why don’t we start with the people who hurt us...the people who ran away when we needed them the most.” Anti suggested slowly, watching to see what Seán’s reaction would be. Seán frowned and wondered who he meant before the images of his previous therapists flashed before his eyes.
“They were scared of us.” Seán said and Anti shook his head.
“No, they knew we couldn’t be helped…” Anti hissed dangerously. “Now they’re the ones who need help.”
“You’re right….” Seán smiled slowly. Anti grinned and the lights in the room went off, the only light was seeping in through the small window above the bed. When the lights turned back on the reflection in the mirror had changed. Seán knew that it was his own reflection now, Anti was gone...
Dr. Jones entered Seán’s room, expecting a scene similar to what he’d been met with every day for a year. Seán was usually sitting on his bed in the same spot, staring at a specific place on a wall. But today he was different. He was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall and singing quietly.
“Good morning!” He said cheerfully when Dr Jones entered the room.
“Well good morning, Seán, you seem to be feeling better!” Dr. Jones said, barely concealing his shock with a forced smile.
“Oh, I feel much better!” Seán replied, eyes twinkling happily. Dr. Jones sat there for the whole hour and Seán had answered all the questions he had for him, laughing and cracking jokes from time to time.
“Seán I’m very impressed with how well you’re doing today. Anti hasn’t appeared once, I think you’re well on the right track to recovery. I might even be able to get that damn jacket off you soon.”
Seán smiles at Dr Jones and his eyes flick to the mirror. The eyes staring back at him are pure black. “I’d like that doctor…” He said, not taking his eyes away from the mirror, “I’d like that very much.”