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Goro is not panicking or nervous. Goro is perfectly calm, gloved hands steady as they wrote down formulas. Clever mind clear and precise as his brain calculates equations. Dark maroon eyes unwavering as they studied the black-haired boy behind the counter.
It's been approximately five months. The average time span in which a couple would confess their love for each other, correct? The stage where mindless infatuation is dismissed and replaced with heavy devotion.
But. Ren had not said those three words yet. Ren had always been the one to act first. Ren had asked Goro out, initiated the first kiss, invited him into his room, asked him to sleep over—in the same bed, side by side—first. Ren frequently took him to Penguin Sniper and Jazz Jin. Ren had bought him a celebratory gift when he'd received the acceptance letter to his college.
So, in conclusion, by theory, Ren has to be the one to say those three words first.
Goro set his pen down, massaging his sore eyes. The ambiance of Leblanc hadn't changed since he'd first stepped in, but he certainly had. He'd grown an awful lot from when he was the weak, unwanted child he'd been fighting Ren in the engine room. He'd matured a little, learned to trust that Ren wouldn't stab him in his sleep. He hoped.
"Goro? You're looking a bit tired," Ren called from where he was, making coffee. He gave his boyfriend a warm smile, preparing a cup effortlessly. "Want another latte?"
"No, thank you. I was just about to head home for the night," Goro nodded at him, closing his notebook. He swiftly cleared the booth table of his supplies, neatly arranging his laptop, books, and pencil case in his briefcase. He'd kept the old thing, a reminder of what happened when he lost sight of himself.
"Oh, okay," Ren wiped his hands off, walking over. "Have a safe trip."
Goro offered him a small smile, softening the sharp edges on his face. "Right."
"Good night!" Ren chirped, reaching out to squeeze Goro's hand. He planted a chaste kiss on his forehead, affectionate.
Goro liked to believe he'd gotten much better at receiving those gestures, particularly not blushing until his whole face resembled a tomato. He even pulled Ren's chin down to briefly touch his lips against the other's smooth ones. "Sleep well."
Goro pulled back with a slight smirk, a bit pleased at how Ren's ears had turned pale pink. He then turned his heel, waving over his shoulder as he walked towards the entrance.
"U-um! You too!" Ren managed to find his voice, although it was slightly shaky.
Goro gave him one last wave, before opening the door and heading towards the station.
It wasn't until he'd shut the door to his apartment in Kichijōji did he let his shoulders sag and confident expression fall. He set his briefcase down on the couch and went over to the calendar he kept on his refrigerator. He crossed out the 3rd of November.
Maybe tomorrow Ren would say he loved him.
It was the morning of November 10, 2017. Officially five months since Ren had asked him out on the June 10th. He'd wanted to be Goro's boyfriend on the same day they'd met a year ago. Just the kind of sentimental trash Goro would expect from him.
Today should be the day Ren says I...love...you, right?
Goro winced at his thoughts, brushing his teeth with a bit more force than necessary. A few bristles fell out and landed in the back of his throat, making him choke and cough. He rinsed his mouth very calmly.
In the shower, his thoughts strayed back to Ren, which was especially dangerous. He was on the edge of slipping and breaking his skull open, of course. He scrubbed himself with the bath pouf until his skin turned bright pink to distract himself.
Throughout his classes, Ren's face flashed in Goro's mind, rent free. His stomach flipped. He was actually nervous.
It's normal to be nervous, he reminded himself sharply. Ren's...confessing his...his...love.
Goro's head turned heavy and the room spun before him, his professor's English lecture melting into background noise. He took deep breaths as he clutched the backrest of the empty chair in front of him, knuckles white under his gloves.
- 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13 .14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20....
He counted all the way up to three hundred before his vision cleared and he could breathe without an anvil weighing his chest down.
He glared at his laptop, an irritating frustration building up in his heart, snowballing larger and larger. He was exceedingly angry at himself. He should be happy. He should be okay at this point—it was the average time partners confessed their love.
He had known Ren for over a year. He trusted Ren. He should be okay with Ren saying the three words.
Goro nearly jumped when the professor approached him, telling him with a worried expression that class was over.
Goro thanked her hurriedly, packing up his supplies. He chose not to think for the rest of the day.
He went straight back to his apartment after lectures, his face blank the entire trip. Once he entered his home, he peacefully set his briefcase down, took off his blazer, and shoved his head in his hands.
Holy fuck. I'm not ready. Ohhhh shit. I can't. I can't. I can't. No. Fuck. I'm...
Okay, Goro, shut the fuck up.
He needed to get a grip on himself. He took a deep breath, clenching his hands into fists and relaxing them. It was fine. Ren's wonderful and sweet and will hopefully not judge. Hopefully, it will all be fine.
After resisting the urge to tear out his hair, he changed into more comfortable clothes and set off for Leblanc. He took his briefcase, a routine he'd developed. Every day, he would go to classes, come back home to change, and set off to see Ren in Leblanc or somewhere else. Today was no different. He'd just have to maintain his cool. And hopefully not combust when Ren...confessed.
"Oh! Hey, Goro," Ren grinned at him cheerfully when Goro walked in. "You're here early." He dusted his hands off, walking over to him as the sparkle returned to the usually mild boy.
Goro's shoulders relaxed slightly, his grip around the briefcase handle loosening. He was still jittery, ready to turn around and sprint away...but Ren's smile was too inviting, too soft.
"Hey, kid, you're not done yet..." Sakura-san trailed off, sighing when Ren turned around with his puppy eyes.
"But...Sojiro-san, Goro's here," Ren pleaded with a smile that nearly split his face in half. He wrapped his arms around Goro's shoulders, digging his chin in the other's shoulder.
"Stop showing off your height," Goro rolled his eyes, lightly elbowing his boyfriend.
Ren had gotten a growth spurt a few months ago, upgrading him to 181 centimeters. He found every way to annoy Goro with his height, especially since Goro'd been taller than him when they first met. It both infuriated Goro and made him like Ren even more.
"What? I'm not doing anything," Ren insisted innocently, leaning down to plant a swift kiss against Goro's cheek.
"Hey—no kisses, since you were being rude," Goro twisted away from Ren's arms, causing him to whine.
"No! So unfair," Ren complained, reaching out with his stupidly long arms. He locked Goro in a vise-like hug, peppering his cheeks with tiny kisses.
"You—Ren—stop that!" Goro managed to scold, snaking his arm up to pull on his boyfriend's ear. His cheeks were steadily growing hot and bright red, blotchy spots on the pale skin.
Ren yelped and pulled away, but not before pressing one final kiss against his warm cheek. He rubbed his ear, cooing at how adorable the older boy was. Goro glared at him half-heartedly, covering his face with a hand.
"Akechi's right, you know," Sakura-san grumbled. "You two are chasing away my customers with all your ruckus."
"It's not like you had any to begin with," Ren smirked back, earning him a coffee ground bag to the head.
"Clean this place up, will you? I'm heading home," Sakura-san continued as if that never happened.
"Fine..." Ren groaned, rubbing his forehead. He began trudging over to the counter, wiping it down.
Goro observed this all with a small smile on his lips, heart swelling just a bit. Ren was adorable, wasn't he? Wait—he was supposed to be annoyed...
He sighed, shaking his head.
Deciding to settle into a barstool instead of gawking over Ren, he pulled out his laptop to work on some homework. Which so conveniently reminded him of his classes, which reminded him of his English lecture, which reminded him of Ren confessing, which reminded him that, 5 months is the average time when both partners confessed their love.
Which meant that he...Akechi Goro...
Goro pretended to dig through his briefcase for a pen, using it to shield his wild eyes and panicked expression.
Oh, holy fuck, I really am not ready. I can't. I...Uhm....okay. I, Akechi Goro, l...lo...lov...lo—I can't!
"Ugh, my shift at Rafflesia was sooo long," Ren informed as he walked over to the booth tables to clean up. "This customer changed his request like, fifty times."
"Mhm," Goro nodded, desperately trying not to freak out. He nearly snapped his pen in half from how hard he was gripping it. He took a deep breath, his mind a complete wreck. "I suppose some days are rather tiring."
"You can say that again," Ren agreed, balancing a stack of plates that went to his nose. "At least I earned extra. And it's not even Saturday yet!"
Goro gave him a half-smile over the counter, his stomach turning as if he'd eaten something spoiled. He was both terrified and slightly excited. He'd been waiting for this moment for an entire week...yet he couldn't see himself saying those three words. Hell, he couldn't even think them inside his head!
What would Ren feel, if he confessed? And Goro didn't reply back with his own?
Goro wanted to throw up. What was wrong with him?
He could barely focus on breathing normally, let alone his notes. He kept glancing at the black-haired boy, trying to formulate a proper response for when the dreaded and desired moment happened. But he kept getting lost in silver eyes, pure and clear, no longer framed by those damned glasses.
"What're you staring for?" Ren asked playfully, wiping down his hands. He began undoing his apron, eyes locked with Goro's.
"No reason," Goro lied smoothly, returning to his notes. His leg kept bouncing rapidly, his hands trembling.
"You're nervous," Ren noted gently, walking over to place a steady hand on Goro's shoulder. "Anything I can do?" He leaned down to press his lips against Goro's forehead, as if checking for a fever.
"It's nothing," Goro managed to sound somewhat coherent, steadying himself with tremendous effort. He looked up, hands already slamming his laptop closed. "Perhaps I'm merely tired. I should head home."
Ren didn't even blink, nodding sympathetically as he pulled away. "Alright. I'll walk you to the station, if that's okay?"
Goro's heart raced. "I suppose."
Ren waited patiently as he gathered up his belongings, hands in his pockets. He was always good at waiting for Goro.
"It's getting chilly," he noticed casually as they walked, slipping his hand into Goro's. "I mean, it is November."
Goro was never more grateful for his gloves, hiding how sweaty his palms were. He tried not to grip Ren's hand or shy away from it. "I presume you're correct."
He bit his lip until he drew blood, coating his tongue with the metallic taste. What was Ren waiting for?
"Well, I suppose this is good night," he began uncertainly, stopping in front of his gate line. He glanced at Ren, eyes far too wide and anxious.
Ren smiled at him reassuringly, although he seemed slightly confused at what he was reassuring. "I guess so. Don't stay up too late," he advised teasingly, pecking Goro's lips.
Goro nodded dumbly, staring frozen in shock. Wasn't Ren going to...? "Uh..."
"Goro?" Ren waved a hand in front of his face, confusion mixing with worry in his expression.
"What? Oh, right. Apologies. Good night, Ren," he quickly rushed out, grabbing the collar of Ren's jacket. He smashed their lips together with a bit more force than necessary, hoping Ren couldn’t taste the copper in his mouth.
Ren's mouth was wide open and his eyebrows had disappeared in his dark, wavy hair when Goro pulled away.
Goro's cheeks burned, and he nodded at his boyfriend before hurrying away. He didn't even pause when he swiped his card, breezing through the fare gates as though he was the wind.
One month had passed. Nothing had changed too much. Goro still went to his lectures, still stayed by Ren's side during evenings. They would go out to the Jazz club on days when they were both free, and occasionally played darts and billiards. Ren was as affectionate as always, but he hadn't said the phrase yet.
Goro propped his head up with a hand to the forehead, tiredness pricking the edges of his brain. The lecture had been going on for half an hour, and he'd already lost focus. He rubbed his eyes, blowing out a heavy breath.
The constant reminder that he and Ren hadn't said I love you yet loomed over him like a storm cloud, filling his mind with water. He knew it wasn't that big of a deal. Couples moved on their own pace. Six months wasn't that unusual.
But...Ren'd always been so precise with everything he did. And besides, he's so...doting all the time. Wouldn’t he say it first? Is...something wrong?
Goro knew he loved Ren. He must. It didn't matter that he couldn't think it properly without having a heart attack. The mental barriers were nothing. He knew, deep down, he loved Ren.
His stupid mind just wouldn't him let say it. Something was holding him back, most likely the same ugly feeling that prevented him from reaching out to Ren in the engine room.
Goro couldn't believe it was still there, lingering as a small voice in the back of his head. Telling him he'd never love or be loved. Telling him he was worthless. Unlovable. Nothing but a crying, stupid child.
I...come on, Goro! He yelled at himself as he began doodling a certain raven-haired boy in his notebook. Just say it, goddamn! I...I lov...Fuck!
He wanted to scream. Instead, he closed his eyes, shoving the back of his palms against them.
Why can't I just fucking say it? I...Ren's my life. I...I can't imagine living without him. He's the only reason why I came back. The only reason why I wanted to come back. After Maruki's illusion...I wanted to run away, like I always did. I wanted to escape the place that was the root of all my pain.
But...Ren kept me from running. The prospect of being unable to see him every day...it would kill me.
Goro gritted his teeth, shoving his hands deeper into his eyes. Think of something else.
What does Ren make me feel? He's...he's so exceedingly sweet. He's nice, considerate, patient. He endures and tolerates my bullshit. He's my everything while I am nothing. He's the reason why I'm in this shitty classroom, after all. I want to be the best for him. He deserves the best.
Goro sighed, shaking his head. I really do love him, don't I?
Wait. I love Ren! I love him! I love Ren!
Goro shot up in the middle of his professor's speech, slamming his hands down on the pull out desk. "I love Ren," he blurted out, a wide grin on his lips.
He could say it! He could think it, he could say it—now, his mind finally acknowledged what his brain and body knew all along. "I love him so much," he continued without missing a beat, a small hysterical laugh escaping his lips. "Holy shit. He's my everything."
He glanced up with wide eyes, running a hand through his hair feverishly. Then he realized just how many people were ogling at him with opened mouths.
The professor froze, her hand in the middle of writing out a concept. The quiet, broody kid in the back her class had just stood up, declared his love for this 'Ren', and was laughing like he was on drugs. A huge smile broke out on her face, and she set down her whiteboard marker to clap her hands. "Congratulates, Akechi-kun!"
Goro's ears turned bright red, and he slowly sat down in mortification. He crossed his arms tightly in front of him, using his laptop as a shield. He cleared his throat, ignoring the concerned looks directed towards him from classmates around the room. "Right. Thank you, Ryuko-san."
Oh my God.
He was glad he'd found a nice, empty place on campus in the beginning of the year. Stone walls surrounded him like a tiny nook, leaving an opening for entering and leaving. A small bench with a table were the only furniture. He went to his little corner to sit during lunch, pulling out his phone to check for any messages.
"Oh! Akechi-kun!"
Goro turn towards the noise with his usual blank, polite persona. He recognized the voice, a bit unfortunately.
Okumura and Niijima walked to him, hand in hand. "We heard of the news," Niijima explained with a straight face. "I'm glad you have your feelings sorted out."
Okumura had a bit more struggle than her girlfriend, hiding her grin behind her hand. "Yes, I agree. Don't worry, we won't tell Ren."
"Fantastic," Goro ground out through clenched teeth, forcing a smile on his lips. He never felt so strongly the urge to dig a hole in the ground and disappear.
Niijima's face finally broke into a brazen smirk, inclining against her girlfriend. "Exactly." She was probably gloating about the fact that she held something over Goro, but he couldn't really say anything against that. She probably deserved it, after everything he'd put her and her girlfriend through.
"We're actually very happy for you, Akechi-kun," Okumura interjected gently. She took a step forward, pulling Niijima with her. Her smile softened as she locked eyes with Goro. "Really."
Goro's throat tightened, and he glanced at the ground. "Right. Thank you again." He managed to sound somewhat composed, despite wanting to tell both of them to mind their business. He had to remind himself that these were Ren's friends and were his temporary teammates a while ago—he shouldn't snap at them.
"Let's not bother Akechi-kun any longer," Niijima suggested wisely, casting him a small sympathetic look as she hugged her girlfriend around the waist.
"Wonderful! More time to continue our puppy debate, Mako-chan," Okumura exulted cheerfully, wrapping her arms around Niijima's neck.
"We are not getting a puppy," Niijima said calmly, leading her away from Goro's corner. "Like I've said for the past three months."
Okumura groaned, leaning against the taller girl. "Do you not love me anymore, Mako-chan?"
Goro heard Niijima's sigh and reply, but he was more focused on Okumura's previous remark. It reminded him of a significant possibility he hadn't even considered before.
Perhaps Ren's...feelings of infatuation have worn off. Perhaps Ren never liked him in the first place. Maybe he just saw Goro pining and took pity on him. Maybe he's just dealing with Goro's clinginess for the time being.
Goro's heart clenched. Surely that wasn't true.
Are you certain? Ren's too polite to turn you down or break things off. He's more subtle than that. Maybe you've just missed all the clues. How ironic for you, Private Investigator.
Goro told the dark part of his mind to shut up. He took a deep breath, taking out his earbuds. His body needed a nice long dose of brown noise.
Goro was particularly anxious to head over to Leblanc that day. He needed to observe Ren with his newfound information, needed to confirm if his theory was proven correct or rejected.
"Early again? If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're eager to see me," Ren's upbeat voice called from a booth. He was studying today, notebooks and papers spilling haphazardly on the table.
Is he just teasing? Or hinting that I'm too needy? It could be him telling me to back off...
Goro nodded slowly, his arms folded stiffly over his chest. "I...had spare time."
Ren waved him over, standing up from his seat. "Well, I'm glad. It means I can spend more time with you!" He laughed excitedly, walking over and pecking Goro's cheek.
Goro bit his lip, holding his tongue. He so desperately wanted to ask, to beg, to demand if Ren really meant what he said. But he was determined to discover on his own. He shouldn't doubt his boyfriend, but he also didn't want to miss any clues if Ren was really suffering.
"I...I agree," Goro said slowly, cautiously. He walked with Ren over to the booth, briskly taking a seat. "I also have some work to finish. Why don't we study together?"
Ren groaned dramatically, lowering himself down to hug Goro's neck. "But I've been studying for hours," he whined adorably, shaking his boyfriend's shoulders. "And I'm not a nerd like you, so I have to take a break."
Goro snorted, rolling his eyes with a small smile. "What are you, five?" he asked sardonically, blowing away the strands of hair that fell in front of his face from all the movement. He got out his notebooks and laptop, placing them neatly on the table despite almost being thrown out of his seat.
"Out of five," Ren finished smugly, wrapping his arms around Goro's waist. He lifted the other boy up seemingly effortlessly, hitching him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.
"Ren—holy shit—" Goro choked out, stifling a scream. He reached behind him and grabbed a handful of soft, dark hair, yanking firmly. "Down. Now."
"Ow! Stop that." Ren's grin could be heard through his voice. He shifted Goro until they were face to face, his beam lighting up his entire body. "Aww, is my tiny little Goro mad?"
Goro's eye twitched in annoyance, and he pinched Ren's ear with his nails. "Do you have a death wish? I'm going to kill you right now if you don't put me down," he warned venomously
Ren ignored him, kissing Goro's cheek playfully. "Aw, your feet can't even touch the ground! They're like, ten centimeters above it!" He cooed, steadying Goro with arms around his waist. He nuzzled his cheek against the brunet's, laughing under his breath.
"Shut the fuck up," Goro snapped, cheeks burning. He reluctantly patted Ren's head, fingers carding through the messy hair. "I'm too heavy."
"Bullshit," Ren scoffed, tilting his head up to steal a kiss. "Shush, now. Or I'll throw you in the trash can."
Goro bit Ren's bottom lip in punishment, rolling his closed eyes. He broke away with a mock glare. "You wouldn't dare."
Despite acting annoyed, Goro's heart was at maximum capacity, nearly bursting and spilling everywhere, ready to fill the room with molten gold.
Ren had proved him wrong, like always. He seemed happy to see Goro, like always. He was grinning and his eyes were sparkling and his shoulders were relaxed—everything about him screamed happy.
Goro folded without any pressure, sighing as he planted his lips against Ren's head. "What you do to me...is absurd," he whispered faintly, shaking his head at himself.
Ren laughed cheerfully, placing his boyfriend back on solid ground. "You're not the only one being driven insane, Goro," he informed with an unabashed smile. "I think I just about lose my mind when I'm with you."
Goro's brain overheated and subsequently fried all of his nerves and he felt like a dead fish on a bed of perfectly steamed rice. His mouth dropped open and he briefly wondered if Ren had somehow snuck back into the Metaverse, summoned Arsène, and shocked him with Thunder Reign.
"I...hope not," he managed to choke out, covering his face with a hand. "Your exams are creeping up, yes?"
"Ugh, don't remind me," Ren muttered, thankfully distracted from Goro's flustered state. He rubbed his eyes drastically, walking over to the booth he'd studied in. He flopped over on the seat, his head hitting the worn cushion.
"You can't escape forever, you know," Goro reminded him sternly, following the other boy to the seat. He pinched the bridge of his nose, sitting down next to Ren. "Regardless, you'll most likely receive full marks as usual."
Ren glanced up curiously, cocking his head as he sat up. He observed Goro carefully, going oddly quiet. It reminded Goro of the old times, when Ren was still on probation and very reserved.
"Spit it out," Goro ordered, sliding his materials across the table. He opened up the first notebook, logging into his laptop and clicking into the lecture notes. He'd been too occupied celebrating over the fact that he could think I love Ren to actually focus on class.
"Does that bother you?" Ren mumbled indistinctly, fidgeting with his hands. His thumbs were rubbing his shirt sleeve gently, occasionally rotating it.
"What?" Goro paused, glancing up from his laptop. "Excuse me?"
Ren looked away, his twitchy fingers traveling to his hair. He messed with his bangs, taking a piece between his thumb and pointer finger. "Well, I just...it's stupid." he stared at his lap, silver eyes downcast and losing their shine. "I thought you'd be upset, I guess. Since you work so hard, and I'm just...there. And I had a lot of advantages compared to you...I..."
Goro cut him off by pressing his lips against Ren's.
Ren made a muffled sound of surprise, freezing in place. His hands stayed at his side, as if he was afraid of crossing a line he didn't know the whereabouts of.
That was fine. Goro was the one to give out physical affection this time, wrapping his arms around Ren's neck. He pulled away after a few seconds to breathe, heart racing and ears blazing uncomfortably.
"Shit, Ren..." Goro trailed off, blinking rapidly as he hugged Ren tighter. Guilt flooded his body with sour bitterness, plaguing his heart. "I'm...so fucking sorry. I didn't—I didn't mean—when I—"
"Woah, Goro, calm down," Ren nearly pleaded, panic lacing his voice. He enveloped Goro in a warm hug, arms reassuring and soothing around his back. "What are you talking about?"
Goro shook his head, pulling back. Pain reflected off of his blood-red eyes, the anguish a clear wound, cutting deep into his heart. "Don't pretend like you didn't hear the bullshit I spouted off in the engine room," he said quietly. "I know you were thinking about it just now, weren't you?"
Ren hesitated, his hands on Goro's waist. His lips curled up into a faint, sorrowful smile. "I'm sorry."
"I should be the one apologizing," Goro countered vehemently, his voice rough. He cupped Ren's face with a hand, touching their foreheads together. "Please, forget everything I said. I'm not...I'm not jealous of your ability. Please. I...I cherish you far too much."
Ren's breath hitched, his cheek growing warm underneath Goro's palm. His smile turned a bit lighter, his gaze glittering with vitality again. "I'm sorry I brought down the mood." He inclined his head against Goro's, squeezing his hand. "You just make me so happy, Goro. I want you to be happy as well."
"It's not your fault," Goro whispered back, his body physically aching for the boy in front of him. Fuck, he loved Ren too much. "And I am happy."
Ren laughed quietly, tilting his head over and gently nudging the older boy's. "Yay."
Goro nudged him back with his forehead, bumping it against his partner's. "Right."
Ren bopped his nose with a finger, cooing softly. "Cute."
Goro's cheeks turned the same wine color as his eyes, and he swatted the hand away. "Alright, that's enough. Open your books again."
Ren groaned dramatically, but complied with a pout. As the two began studying in a comfortable silence, Goro established something to himself.
So Ren does really like me and care for me. I'm glad. I'm so fucking glad. I never should've doubted him. I need to make it up to him somehow. But. There must be a different reason as to why Ren hasn't confessed yet.
Hm. Perhaps Ren is worried. After all, he'd been the one to make the first move on nearly everything. Saying the phrase "I love you" is a significant step in our relationship, so Ren might be nervous. In that case, it's absolutely okay. I'm willing to give Ren anything.
Goro glanced over at the other boy, who was doodling off to the side of his homework.
Furthermore, it gives me more time to practice actually saying 'I love you' out loud.
After approximately three more months of their relationship, he was able to finally murmur it under his breath. He refined his speech and reactions during lunch, repeating the phrase over and over until his face stopped reaching the same temperature as an inferno.
Ren was the same as usual, latching onto Goro and refusing to let go. He'd been a bit more touchy recently, seizing every chance he had to initiate physical contact such as holding hands or hugging. Goro couldn't exactly say he didn't like it.
Two more months later, in April, Ren enrolled in his college. Both a blessing and a curse, really. Goro had to remind himself every day not to lose control of his cold façade in campus, Ren's presence naturally destroying his barriers. On the other hand Goro loved having Ren, practically joined at the hip with him. They rode the train together, and although they attended different classes, they ate lunch together in Goro's little corner. The only others who ate with them were Okumura and Niijima, who apparently decided that since Ren was allowed, they were automatically permitted to sit with him. They weren't, but Goro held his tongue.
"This reminds me of the old times," Okumura began during one lunch, comfortably seated in her girlfriend's lap.
Niijima smirked slightly, nodding. She shared half of her onigiri with Okumura, a soft smile on her lips. "I agree. The walls are similar to your attic, Ren."
Ren laughed sheepishly, rubbing the nape of his neck. "Yeah...I should really get my own place. But I feel kinda bad about abandoning Sojiro-san and Futaba..."
Goro glanced at him from his left, fingers pausing on his laptop. He raised an eyebrow, pretending to be busy pulling out papers from his folder. "You should get an apartment near the campus or a dorm, if you are to move away."
Ren grinned at him, cocking his head playfully. "Oh, really? Isn't your apartment somewhere near here? In Kichijōji?" he asked innocently.
Okumura and Niijima exchanged knowing looks, holding their breath. Niijima squeezed the other girl's hand, a soothing gesture. Hopefully it would help her from bursting into a fit of giggles.
Goro rolled his eyes, obviously noticing the couple's reactions.
Don't they have a swell relationship. It's clear those two live together and they've stated before that they'll marry after college.
Goro blew out a breath, sparing Ren a glance from the corner of his eye. "Yes, I do. You're welcome to reside there, if you require a place to stay," he said simply. Completely cool on the exterior, he went back to revising his essay,.
Oh shit, holy shit—! Okay, okay, calm down Goro, you did good. Just restrain your face from turning red and take deep breaths. Ohhhh, I hope Ren lives with me, I want to wake up with him, have breakfast with him, study with him—
"Someone sounds eager," Ren teased, wrapping an arm around Goro's waist.
"More like I don't want to spend another night on your shitty mattress," Goro corrected, his heart speeding up slightly from the touch.
Ren moved his head in front of Goro's, forcing the other to meet his gaze. "Is that an offer?" he asked with an excited glint in his irises.
Goro shrugged, staring back flatly. "Yes."
Ren's face split in a huge smile. "Seriously?"
Goro rolled his eyes dramatically, nodding. He grabbed the top of Ren's head and yanked him away from his vision, sighing. "Yes, now get out of my way. I need to finish this."
Niijima smirked from the side, noting how Goro's hand gently ruffled Ren's hair before letting go.
Goro shot her a glare, pinching the bridge of his nose before glancing back at his essay.
Rubbing his head with a pout, Ren bumped Goro's shoulder. "Mean."
Ren moved in the day after.
"Unsurprisingly, you don't have much," Goro commented bluntly as he carried two out of five cardboard boxes. He kicked open his apartment door, striding right in.
Ren grinned sheepishly, piling the remaining three on top of each other. "Yeah. I guess it's the whole 'on probation and living in an attic' thing."
"Really? I wouldn't have guessed." Goro dropped the boxes on top of his small coffee table.
His apartment wasn't very interesting—it had two bedrooms, but one was used as an office. The kitchen and living room was one open space, with a TV on the wall in front of a plain beige couch. The black-and-white kitchen proved to be rather simple, spotless and sink clear of dirty dishes. The bathrooms were stocked with basic necessities, the first-aid kit on the top shelf.
Ren examined the apartment from the entrance, gaze raking over every detail. He slowly walked to the table to set down two of his boxes, drinking everything all in. "I love this place."
Goro cleared his throat, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. "Right. Thanks. The bedroom's this way," he directed, pointing down the hallway. The walls were plain white, no decorations or picture frames. Every inch of the apartment was meticulously clean, tidy, and minimalistic.
"I'm gonna have to spruce some things up," Ren informed as he followed his boyfriend. He caught up with Goro to plant a kiss on top of his head.
Goro blew out a breath, shaking his head as he opened the door. "I'm extremely excited." But a small smile was on his face.
The bedroom proved to be exactly like the rest of the flat. A full bed with white blankets was pushed off to the corner of the room, a nightstand next to it with a lamp, a gray closet, a plain wooden desk with a laptop and notebooks, a bookshelf containing old novels, a plushy beige barrel chair, and a door leading to the bathroom. A notebook was opened up to the 30th page, words arranged neatly in rows and columns, sorting out the facts and formulas. A jacket was draped over the chair, a small potted plant that was a gift from Ren on the windowsill.
The walls were actually decorated this time. A picture of their first official date at the aquarium, a selfie they took at the Tokyo Skytree, and other photos featuring the two of them were hung carefully. Goro had cleaned them so thoroughly they reflected the light off of the ceiling bulbs.
"Goro..." Ren trailed off quietly, gaping at the picture frames.
Goro's ears turned bright red, unbearable under his hair. He snatched a rubber band off of the nightstand, tying his locks up loosely. "What? It's customary to have pictures of your boyfriend, isn't it?" he defended quickly, crossing his arms.
Ren's grin softened, and he set the box down near the bed. Crossing the room in two swift steps, he wrapped his arms tightly around his boyfriend. "Oh, you're so incredibly sweet. My everything," he added in the tiniest whisper, barely more than a breath.
A beaming smile slowly spread across Goro's face, accompanied by his entire body turning to mush. He melted in Ren's embrace, as much as he hated the floaty feeling. "You sentimental sap," he muttered fondly, shaking his head.
Ren laughed, his heart bursting at the seams. He was absolutely elated. Goro'd been slowly warming up to him, trusting him. Ren was more than determined to prove that he was trustworthy, the only rival Goro could ever want.
"You're adorable," he cooed teasingly, pressing a kiss on Goro's cheek.
"I could kill you with two maneuvers," Goro deadpanned, the area where Ren's lips touched him turning hot. He rolled his eyes in an attempt to hide his flustered state, pulling away to walk towards the box. "Now, why don't we start unpacking lest we end up working until the sun sets and rises again?"
Ren grinned as he followed suit, digging his nail in the tape and ripping it in half. "As you wish." He unboxed his belongings, pulling out randomly thrown together clothes and plushies he won from the claw machines.
Goro watched warily as the other boy began piling up stuffed dolls (and a Big Bang Burger-kun?) on his vacant bed, stacking them up in the corners.
Pulling out a few other items such as Featherman Dolls, a ramen bowl, a swan boat, and hero figure, Ren gathered them up in his arms and headed towards the bookshelf. He arranged them in any empty space he could, often unequally spaced and crooked.
Goro winced at the disorganization, sighing deeply. "No—Red Eagle is tilted the wrong way. Black Falcon is far too close to Red Eagle as well." He walked over, adjusting the figurines neatly.
Ren observed him with an amused smile, quirking an eyebrow up. "Aren't you a perfectionist?"
"Shut up," Goro ordered, leaning over a bit to straighten up a Jack Frost Doll. His shoulder brushed Ren's briefly, shooting sparks up his spine.
"I thought all this was my stuff?" Ren smirked mildly as he placed a hand on the small of Goro's back. He peered over the other's shoulder, pointing at the ramen bowl. "Now that's tilted the wrong way."
"Shut up," Goro repeated tartly, although he grabbed the decoration and handed it over to Ren. "You do it. I'll hang your vexatious fairy lights."
Ren's smirk grew wider as he swooped down to kiss his boyfriend's cheek. "If you can even reach that high."
Goro whipped his head to the side, blood-red eyes blazing. "I'm going to kill you."
"I would gladly die in your hands, sweetheart," Ren declared wistfully, collapsing on his knees as he bowed down to Goro.
A tiny laugh escaped the brunet's lips, painting a smile on his face. "Oh, for fuck's sake, get up," he chided in fond exasperation. He tried holding onto the irritation from Ren's previous remark, but it vanished instantly when he saw Ren's full smile.
Goro blew out a breath, his body bright and airy. He took the fairy lights from inside the box, pushing his chair over to the walls. He climbed on and reached on his toes, looping the wires in elegant stars and even a small, indiscernible heart. He hated how the sentimentality from Ren slowly corrupted him as well.
"It's looking great!" Ren called from where he was taking out his rumpled mess of clothes. He shook them aggressively to smooth out the wrinkles, folding them haphazardly.
"Thanks—wait—fold them correctly," Goro pointed out sternly, jumping down from the chair. He took a shirt from the pile, evening it out with his hands. He pressed it flat against the bed, folding the sleeves and midsection over methodically.
Ren dropped his clothes and threw his arms around Goro's shoulders, sighing. "It doesn't have to be perfect, does it?" he asked gently, kissing the back of his boyfriend's neck.
A bolt of harsh electricity shot up and down Goro's spine, the hairs on his neck standing up straight. He had to bite his lip, hard, to conceal any sounds. His ears turned bright red, and he violently slammed the tunic down on the bed. "Fine. It's getting late. We should unpack the rest of your belongings and then get ready for bed."
Ren laughed faintly at the display, smiling against Goro's neck. "Okay. I need to test out your kitchen, anyways. You don't mind a hint of spice in your curry, right?"
Goro pinched the bridge of his nose, whirling around to confront his boyfriend. "You're so amusing, Amamiya," he deadpanned sarcastically, eyes narrowed. He grabbed Ren's collar and pulled him down for a bruising kiss, unrelenting.
When Goro released him, Ren's face was in the most satisfactorily shade of scarlet.
After a rather chaotic dinner, the two lovers finally settled in for some sleep. Ren took the side closest to the door, while Goro's compressed body was an inch away from the wall. He lied flat on his back, head tilted towards Ren. Ren was facing Goro, his hands curled up in front of him.
Okay. Don't panic, Goro. You've slept with Ren more times than you can count.
Goro pulled the blankets up to both of their chins, even though it was already late April. He cupped his hands together, a palm over his icy knuckles.
"Are you cold?" Ren whispered, propping himself up with a hand as he scrutinized the other boy.
Goro glanced over at him, vision slightly obstructed by stray locks of brown hair. "Somewhat," he admitted in a similar tone, shifting his attention up to the fairy lights. They were glowing faintly, fading between the colors of the rainbow.
Ren smiled at him gently, rubbing his eyes. "Can I cuddle?" Every night, he'd asked Goro if he wanted any physical contact. Despite Goro affirming the request, Ren'd continued to ask every day.
Goro's cheeks flushed, and he nodded almost imperceptibly. "Yes." He relaxed his muscles from the rigid soldier position. Then he decided to be either very brave, or very foolish. "I...actually enjoy it. So there is no need to ask next time."
Ren froze, his mouth dropping open and hand nearly jabbing his eye out. He stared at Goro for a painful three seconds before snapping out of it, beaming wider than ever. "Okay. Holy shit. You make me so damn happy, Goro." He reached out to caress Goro's hand, silvery eyes glowing in the darkness.
Oh. Is he going to...?
He scooted over even closer. He wrapped his warm arms around Goro, effortlessly turning the other boy on his side. Ren laced his arms around Goro's back and shoulders, spreading heat through his boyfriend's body. The black-haired boy also tucked Goro's head under his chin, resting his cheek on the silky hair.
A small sigh of content slipped out of Goro's lips, and he closed his now-heavy eyes. The warmth was equivalent to coming home after years away, breathing in the scent of safety, muscles resting after profound strain, the flow of love—
Not today. But.
"Thank you." He kept his hands in front of his chest, the back of his palms touching Ren's midsection.
Ren kissed his head, tightening the embrace. "Always. I'm your rival."
Goro wanted to cry and laugh and scream.
The next day, Goro had had enough. He was going to cease from running away and finally confess to Ren. Honestly confess to him, with every aspect included. Or else Goro would genuinely die.
He knew that he should probably wait for Ren, but the love inside of him felt ready to grow wings and explode from his heart. His throat was sore from choking down the words, and his chest was heavy from the weight.
And maybe...Ren's just nervous, like me. Maybe he wants me to initiate something for once. Additionally, you never know unless you try...I need to stop being such a coward for once.
Goro took a deep breath, nearly choking on his toothpaste. He'd done this act far too many times. He would consider mouthwash if he weren't such a germaphobe. He shook his head, taking off his clothes to shower.
Okay. Focus, Goro. Today, you will tell Ren that you love him. You should probably gift him something as well...maybe those spicy chocolates from the Premium Supermarket Taisho...
"Goro? You up?" Ren knocked on the bathroom door, voice deep from having just woken up.
Goro's stupid heart fluttered from how damn attractive Ren sounded in the morning. Completely unfair, considering he was already captivating enough alone. He considered opening the door just to hear the rich rasp—no, focus.
"Yes. Allow me to take a brisk shower, then the bathroom is yours," Goro called back easily, as if he wasn't just admiring how hot his boyfriend was.
"Sure. Take your time."
Goro nodded to himself, finishing undressing and stepping underneath the cold streams. He flinched from the icy water, but forced himself to grab his bath pouf. He cleaned himself thoroughly and rapidly, before jumping out just as fast as he'd gotten in. After lathering on lotion, dressing himself in his usual collared shirt, tie, and dress slacks, he checked his reflection in the mirror.
His dark red eyes had faint circles underneath them, although they were a huge improvement from before he'd started sleeping with Ren. He didn't even need to use concealer anymore these days. Thankfully, his pale skin was clear and smooth, cheeks tinted a healthy pink. His hair was getting longer, however—strands were reaching his collarbone.
Goro pinched himself to snap out of it, running a hand through the brown locks. He opened the door, glancing around for his boyfriend. "Ren. I'm finished."
Ren was on the bed, cross-legged and on his phone. His hair was adorably rumpled, strands sticking up everyone. His eyes were still heavy with sleep, soft in a way that made Goro's heart clench.
"Okay. Coming." He smiled lethargically, rubbing his eyes with a hand.
Goro approached him, climbing on the edge of the bed to peck Ren's cheek. "Hey. Just so you know, I need to do something in the morning. Are you available tonight for billiards at Penguin Sniper?"
Ren's smile grew at the endearment, tilting his head up expectantly for more. "Mhm."
"Answer me properly when I'm speaking to you," Goro muttered affectionately, despite fulfilling Ren's wishes and kissing his forehead. He peered down at Ren's delicate state, so adorable and innocent. "You little slug."
"'M no slug," Ren protested groggily, yawning with his mouth open. He nudged his cheek against Goro's neck, movements slow and laced with morning tiredness.
Goro's lips twitched into a completely smitten smile. "Don't fall asleep on me," he warned, his voice lacking any severity. "I'm leaving now."
Ren immediately pounced on him, going limp and squeezing him tightly in his arms. "Nooo...don't go," he insisted slowly, burying his face in Goro's chest.
Goro's face burned, his chest constricting like a vise. "Are you mental?" he demanded, his voice an octave higher than usual. He stroked Ren's wild hair, attempting to tame it down against his forehead.
"No. Just want you to stay," Ren answered straightforwardly, grinning smugly against the fabric of Goro's formal shirt, feeling the heat of his body through the thin cloth.
"You're going to wrinkle my clothes," Goro stated flatly, although he didn't sound like he minded. He rubbed his temple with a free hand, torn between needing to buy the gift for his boyfriend or staying with said boyfriend. Both choices would most likely please Ren, which perfectly aligned with Goro's goal.
"Fine," he finally decided. "You have five more minutes."
Ren's smile lit up his entire body.
Goro's cheeks were still on fire when he walked out of his apartment, covering his mouth with a hand. He nearly sprinted to the train station, tilting his head down and allowing his hair to frame his face. He'd stayed for ten more minutes then he'd planned...Ren was far too enticing for his own good.
He switched lines to travel to Shibuya, planning to scout out the Underground Mall for the chocolates. They were one of the best gift ideas, and he had a long list of what to give Ren.
The mall proved to be rather useful even though the supermarket was deep inside. There were a lot more people there than Goro would've liked, with a group of high schoolers advertising their theatre troupe. Another bunch of girls were discussing music in front of the cosmetics store.
He had to shove past a crowd of second-year students who attended Shujin to even step foot inside the store. The tacky, ear-splitting music stabbed at Goro's poor ears as he searched the shelves for the right item. Eventually, he found the sickeningly sugary parcel, red hearts and dancing teddy bears (that reminded him a bit too much of a certain Shadow) painted all over the front. The package itself was shaped in a heart, stripes of pink and magenta weaving throughout the design. It disgusted him.
He bought it anyway, hoping that the five out of five red pepper label on the side next to the bar code was an exaggeration. Then again, Ren handled spice extremely well, and would probably enjoy it like the freak he was.
Goro spent the next few hours rehearsing his speech and plan in his bathroom. He was eternally grateful to whichever god that it was a Saturday, meaning Ren wanted to work at the flower shop for a bonus salary.
He pinched his own arm, staring straight at the mirror image of himself in the glass. "Alright, Goro. Begin."
He forced himself to train his eyes on every one of his movements, practicing keeping his expression calm and body relaxed. "Ren. We've known each other for two years and have been boyfriends for one year now. I cannot express my gratitude to you in a way that will convey all of my feelings. I appreciate every aspect of you there possibly is, and I am forever in your debt." Goro steeled his shoulders, staring right into the reflection of his wine-colored eyes. "I would like to confess an important matter that I believe will change the dynamic between us forever. I, Akechi Goro, love you, Amamiya Ren."
He reached into his pocket, which contained the candy. "Please accept this gift," he continued mechanically, placing the box on the counter. "I understand that you deserve someone much more adequate than myself, but I hope that you'll accept me as well."
Goro stood there for a good few seconds after the speech, staring blankly at his hands. He couldn't, just couldn't fuck this up. He needed to be perfect. Needed to say it in a way that would hopefully not make Ren hate him forever. Because Goro would die if that were to ever happen—and if Ren rejected him today, he would kill himself...but that's fine. Goro is completely confident that things will turn out okay.
"You're improving," Goro commented as he watched the raven-haired successfully execute a trick shot. The cue ball tapped the solid one, pocketing it without sinking in the gap itself. It was the last one Ren needed to sink in order to win.
Ren grinned at him proudly, fidgeting with his bangs. "All thanks to my rival," he clarified with a wink, leaning over slightly to press his lips against Goro's cheek.
Goro rolled his eyes adoringly, nimbly twisting his head to steal a proper kiss before pulling away just as swiftly. Leaving Ren pouting and crossing his arms playfully, Goro bent over the table and lined up his cue stick. He adjusted it to a satisfactory level, holding his breath. He struck the ball gently, allowing it to smoothly glide over and bump the last striped ball into the pocket.
"You're not bad yourself," Ren smirked, crossing over to the opposite side of him. He angled his cue stick towards the ball, still maintaining eye contact.
Goro shrugged slightly, raising an eyebrow back. They'd been playing rounds non-stop for a while now, winners alternating between him and Ren. Ren was ahead by one victory, but Goro was more than determined to turn the tide.
Ren's next shot knocked the cue ball past the eight-ball, driving it to ricochet off the cushion. It landed diagonally from the eight-ball, so close they were practically touching. The two phenolic resin balls aligned almost perfectly, right in front of the pocket in the middle of the table.
"Son of a bitch," Ren cursed cheerfully, lips twitching up into a half-hysterical grin.
Goro smiled at him sweetly, switching to his right hand. He merely tapped the ball with the end of the cue stick, staring into Ren's deep silver eyes as the eight-ball sank into the pocket. "Checkmate."
"Fuck you." Ren crossed his arms childishly, blowing a strand of dark hair away from his face. He leaned against the table, pouting again with his lips pursed tightly.
Goro laughed quietly, striding over. "What? Now we're truly on even ground," he reminded the younger boy. Despite his soothing words, he was secretly, just a little bit, glad that Ren was so openly annoyed. Ren almost always shielded his negative emotions from everyone. Everyone except Goro, the brunet was proud to know.
"Hmph." Ren turned his back towards Goro, slouching over.
Goro's smile widened. He twisted around to meet Ren, cupping the taller's cheeks in his hands. "Oh, shush. You are a baby." He captured the other's lips in a chaste kiss, immediately unwinding from the intensity of the game.
Ren's icy façade melted as he embraced his boyfriend, nuzzling his nose against Goro's cheek. "Your baby."
"For fuck's sake..." Goro trailed off, stroking the hairs that curled up on the nape of Ren's neck. He shook his head, exasperation and love tangled together in a mess of affection.
Would now be the perfect time? Or is it too early?
Ren delicately detached himself from Goro, opting to rest against the side of the pool table. He took Goro's hands, lacing their fingers together. "Want a rematch?"
Goro studied their conjoined hands, slotting together perfectly. Pale, long fingers against slender gloved ones. Nowadays, he only wore gloves outside, never inside his—their—apartment or when he was with Ren. He briefly squeezed Ren's hand before pulling away, taking a deep breath.
Alright. Don't fuck this up, Goro. You can't afford to fuck this up.
"Ren," he began, coercing himself to focus on the other boy and his expression. Ren was glancing at him curiously, head cocked adorably.
Goro continued, subtly wringing his hands. "We've known each other for two years..." Panic filled his nervous system as his mind blanked out.
Shit, shit, fuck—! Speak, you damn fool!
Goro shook his head, laughing a bit hysterically. He smiled bitterly at himself, running a hand through his hair. "Fuck...apologies, Ren. I...You mean the world to me. There is no 'Goro' without 'Ren.' I can't live without you, as pathetic as it is. I would die for you. I would do anything for you. You are the light in my black void, the color in this gray city, the cool rain in a desert of hatred. I wouldn't be here without you. You are everything. My rival. My boyfriend. My life. I...I love you, Ren. I fucking love you so damn much, I—I—" Goro finally tore his gaze away from Ren's shocked, wide eyes to glower at the floor.
He crossed his arms tightly in front of him, fear and apprehension choking him until he couldn't breathe. The heavy silence that draped over them was equally suffocating, filling his veins and cells and—
"Shit—Goro!" An intense impact stunned Goro still, his body rigid and lips parting in surprise. At first he thought Ren slammed him against the pool table, but the other boy was in fact hugging the oxygen out of him.
Goro could barely feel his limbs with how intensely Ren was clutching him, holding on as if it was their last moment on Earth together, their last second standing.
Confusion mixed with pleasant surprise and a lingering speck of uncertainty circulated throughout Goro's mind, although he had nowhere to direct it. Ren had no intention of letting go any time soon, his arms firm and unyielding.
"Wh-what?" Goro managed to rasp, sacrificing precious breaths of air.
Ren seemed to realize he was slowly strangling his boyfriend, and loosened his grip. He beamed at Goro, eyes even more silvery with the glossy sheen over the beautiful orbs. "I love you too, sweetheart. I love you so damn fucking much. You're my everything as well."
Goro grinned back widely, the sight of Ren's tears causing some of his own to form. He pushed them back and blinked them away, ripping off his gloves. He snatched Ren's hands in his own, the warmth of his palms engulfing Goro's entire body.
Goro then paused, doing a double take. He cocked his head at Ren, raising an eyebrow at how casual and unworried his demeanor was. "Wait." His cheeks turned bright red, heat blossoming and spreading everywhere. "Why didn't you say anything?"
Ren smiled at him softly, gripping his hand as if they were going to be pried apart. "I didn't want you to feel pressured. I wanted you to feel comfortable with your feelings and not influenced by me. I was also worried you'd be uncomfortable at the display of affection." He pressed a soothing kiss against Goro's hair, continuing to pepper his forehead and temples with his lips.
Goro's entire body was a volcano.
FUCK! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!
Goro's heart exploded. It was the only explanation he could give. Tears welled up and spilled over his lashes, his shaky body slamming into Ren's as the only thoughts that went through his mind was getting as close to the other boy as possible.
To feel his warmth. To feel the elation in his body, to cry with joy and laugh with bittersweetness, to breathe in Ren's scent of coffee and vanilla, to compress their bodies and souls together in a clashing, complimenting duo. To love and be loved.
"Shh," Ren consoled reassuringly, his arms strong around Goro, anchoring him down to the world, steadying him in the raging sea of uncertainty. "I love you, Akechi Goro. More than anything or anyone."
Goro buried his face in the crook of Ren's neck, jamming his eyes shut in an attempt to block any more salty water to flow from the gates. He clung onto his lover's shoulders tightly, digging his blunt nails into the gray cotton of his hoodie.
Goro didn't trust his voice to work properly, pouring all of his scorching, white-hot affection into the hug. In the way he bit his lip to conceal the quiet hiccups, wiped his eyes by shaking his head on Ren's shoulder, dug his fingers deeper in Ren's body—he loved Ren.
And Ren loved him back. In the way he gripped Goro just as firmly, if not even tighter, the way he pressed them together as if wanting to merge their essences together, the way he hid his face in Goro's silky hair—he loved Goro.
Ren laughed faintly, breath sending shivers down Goro's neck. "You know, Goro," he smiled sweetly. He pulled back just the slightest bit to gaze at him lovingly. "I've loved you, truly loved you, knew I wanted to spend my entire life and the next million ones with you...when you shot me in the head."
Goro's mouth dropped open, and his eyebrows shot up to disappear under his hair. "P-pardon?" he cleared his throat of the voice crack that plagued the majority of the word. He held Ren's jaw in his hands, staring straight into those alluring silver orbs.
"Are you insane?"
Ren kept one arm wrapped around Goro and used the other one to take Goro's hand from his cheek. He kissed the back of his palm, maintaining eye contact. "Yes. Like I said before...you make me lose my damn mind."
BONUS:
"Um, Goro?"
Goro looked up from the bed, slipping a bookmark into the novel he was reading. "Yes?"
Ren walked in the room, holding out his shirt with only one hand. It was covered in tiny brown smudges, smeared around the gray fabric. He raised an eyebrow at Goro, lips twitching in amusement. "Forgot something yesterday?"
Goro blinked, eyes growing wide. He climbed off the bed, stalking over to inspect the cloth. "What the fuck...?"
Ren grinned at him widely, shoulders shaking in a fit of restrained laughter. "That's not all." He took out the hand behind his back, revealing a nearly shredded box. It was barely able to support its own weight in the air, but the exterior was painfully familiar. Bright pink colors, a ripped teddy bear.
It was the box of spicy fucking chocolates. The same box that Goro had apparently forgotten to give to Ren...oh, holy shit.
"The whole load's covered in what I assume is chocolate," Ren informed a stunned Goro. He finally burst out giggling like a madman, gasping for air.
Goro wasn't as amused. Mortification and horror were electric ice down his back, freezing him in place. His mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, throat unable to make any sound. "...Ren....I...."
Ren's hysteric laughing had calmed down slightly, and he bunched up the shirt in one hand while tossing the ruined box in the bin near the door. "Calm down, Goro. Honestly, I think it's so sweet," he assured him, walking over to peck his boyfriend's lips.
Goro flushed darkly, unable to meet Ren's gaze. He couldn't believe he forgot such a crucial part of his plan and left the gift in his pocket to ruin the laundry.
"Seriously," Ren smiled softly, sensing Goro's inner turmoil. "It's okay. And besides, I'm happy. It means I affected you enough to lose your marbles, 'cause Normal Goro wouldn't fumble."
Goro shook his head, sighing in both relief and embarrassment. "I'm still incredibly sorry, Ren. And thank you for...this." He crossed his arms over his chest, feeling as though he was a child again, caught reading at night or spilling the milk accidentally.
Ren gently took him in his arms, careful to keep the messy shirt out of the way. "It's fine, sweetheart. I'm not mad or upset or anything. You heard me laughing, right? I'm amused and happy and there's that nice feeling in my chest," he comforted tenderly as he littered kisses all over Goro's face. He booped his boyfriend on the nose with a finger, smiling playfully. "Love ya."
Goro's shoulders relaxed as he finally allowed a small smile to form on his lips. "I love you too, Ren. So much."
Ren laughed lightly in delight, swooping down again to kiss Goro's lips. "I sure hope so."