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‘Let me see him.’
Rouge stood outside the doors of GUN’s biomedical department, and her wings were trembling. The entire headquarters building was in chaos. GUN agents rushed to and fro, and Abraham Tower stood in front of her. In another timeline, they might not even be here – her, the commander, or her fellow operatives. The United Federation might have been reduced to a smoking crater, along with dozens of other countries. The few who survived may have faced a nuclear winter. But more than 50 years ago, their world had been given a reluctant saviour… and that person was somewhere behind these double doors.
‘I can’t, Rouge.’ Abraham gave her a weary look. ‘Please, listen—’
‘No!’ She attempted to shove past him, but he grabbed her by the shoulders. She twisted and writhed, and nearly hit him in the face with her wings. ‘He saved us. He saved all of us! The least I can do is be by his side—’
‘Rouge!’ Abraham snapped. His hands tightened on her shoulders like steel traps. He was getting older, and the lines in his face were getting deeper, but he still had the same wiry strength she had come to know over the years. ‘He asked us to put him back together before we let you in, damn it!’
Rouge’s hands fell to her sides, and her ears went completely flat.
She knew that he had been injured. How could he not have been? He’d seen that no one, not even her or Omega, could have navigated the war zone ahead of them and survived. No one, that is, except for him. So he’d crossed the endless expanse in the blink of an eye, thrown himself down into the missile silos, and blown them up before their payloads could launch. He’d been at the heart of the blast radius.
He’d won the war before anyone else could even begin fighting the first battle.
The door behind Abraham swung open, and a medical technician leaned through the gap. ‘Commander? His vitals are improving, but—’
Rouge twisted out of Abraham’s grip and slammed one foot into his shin, incapacitating him long enough to shove the technician out of the way and dive through the gap, flying as fast as her wings could carry her. Doctors and nurses scrambled to take cover, and each frantic sweep of her wings scattered papers in her wake. Where was he? Where—
She caught a glimpse of red and gold in the ICU ward, and she dropped to the ground, sprinting down the hall. He was in a secure room, but it didn’t matter. She dashed into the darkened adjoining observation room, snatched a keycard from a staff member, and shouldered the connecting door open before the armed guards on either side could stop her.
The metal door hit the wall with a loud crack, followed by an eerie silence. The scent of antiseptic wafted around her. Almost every square foot of floor space was occupied by medical equipment, leaving only a narrow circuit to walk between the bed, the door, and certain machines. She padded over to the bed, stumbling in the near darkness. Glowing monitor screens and dancing waveforms illuminated her path. Her heart was pounding.
The hospital bed was at the heart of the room. Countless IV lines and wires trailed from it, like veins and arteries trailing from a beating heart. Rouge crept over and rested her hands on the railing, staring at the bed’s occupant.
It wasn’t fair. How could he sleep so peacefully while she was worried out of her mind?
She reached out, cradling Shadow’s face with one hand. He was lying on his side, oblivious to her touch and the faint beeping of the monitors. As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she felt a lump rise in her throat. His body was covered in bandages, so much so that she could barely see his fur. His face was scratched. Gauze patches were taped to his ears. He had IV lines embedded in his arms, and an oxygen mask was fitted to his face.
Maybe it was the large hospital bed, or maybe it was the way she was looking down at him, but he seemed smaller. It wasn’t as though he had a large frame by any means, but his shoulders looked even slimmer than she remembered. He looked… vulnerable.
His ear twitched, and his brow furrowed. Rouge froze, holding her breath. His ruby eyes flickered, drooping as he struggled to keep them open. His face was half buried in his pillow. He could only see a sliver of the room. But he could see enough. He could see the medical devices and the GUN logos plastered on them.
Shadow couldn’t even sit upright, but he braced his hand against the mattress in a futile attempt to right himself. His plastic oxygen mask clouded as he struggled to draw breath. His voice came out as a faint whisper. ‘…I-Is Rouge all right?’
Her hand twitched, and he looked up. The moment he saw her face, his eyes softened, and his hand relaxed.
‘Yeah,’ Rouge said, trying to steady her voice. ‘She is.’
He gazed at her for a moment longer, as though to convince himself that he wasn’t imagining her. Then he let his eyes close again. A weak smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.
‘H-Hey.’ She pressed her fingertips against his temple. ‘Stay with me, all right?’
‘I’m fine, Rouge.’ His voice was heavy and slurred, and he moved his head slightly, resting it against her hand. His chest rose and fell as though each breath was an effort. ‘But I’d hoped to have a little more time to recover before you saw me.’
She pressed her lips together in a thin, angry line. ’Did you honestly think that GUN could stop me from reaching you?’
‘Not really. But I know you hate seeing me in this type of state.’
‘I hate when you do things like this.’ Rouge lowered the safety rail on the bed and carefully sat beside him, taking care not to bump his bandaged arms. He shifted slightly, and she felt his waist press against her hip. She took a shaky breath, willing herself not to cry. ‘I hate it when you put yourself in harm’s way just so other people don’t have to get hurt.’
‘It’s my choice.’ There were long pauses between each sentence, as though he had to gather his strength each time he wanted to speak. ‘I know that I can survive anything, but I can’t say the same thing about anyone else.’
Rouge clenched her fists, digging her knuckles into her thighs. He’d been created to be a cure – to undergo countless tests and endure numerous illnesses. He’d been created to be a weapon and to put his body on the line for the sake of the world. One way or another, it felt like he’d been created to lie in a hospital bed – to suffer – and she hated that fact with every fibre of her being.
‘It’s not fair.’ She pressed the back of one hand against her eyes, took a deep breath, and exhaled.
His finger brushed hers, and she looked down to see that he was trying to take her hand, albeit unsuccessfully. ‘I know. But it’s my choice. I’ll always choose to keep you safe.’
‘Do you think that’s supposed to comfort me?’
Shadow slipped his hand beneath hers and held it clumsily. ‘It should.’ He closed his eyes again, and Rouge felt a twinge of guilt for arguing with him. He was clearly exhausted. ‘I protect the world because I feel like I should, not because I want to. I’d rather protect you… or at the very least, the world that you live in.’
‘I don’t need your protection,’ Rouge whispered. ‘You don’t need to do this to yourself.’
‘But I want to.’ He gazed at his hands. They lay limp, but they were normally filled with a strength that she couldn’t begin to fathom. ‘It makes it… easier.’
‘Really? This is easier? This?’
‘It’s easier than merely protecting a world that I have no love for.’ Shadow faltered, affording her a rare glimpse of hesitation. ‘But I know this path is harder… for you.’
Rouge wanted to agree. She wanted to beg him not to take these risks. She wanted to insist that he be more careful for her sake. But his life was already hard enough, and she knew that full well. If having someone to fight for made his existence more bearable, then she would have to learn to bear the weight of his love for her.
Rouge pressed a kiss to his brow and said, ‘Oh, sweetheart. Is there anywhere that you aren’t hurt?’
Shadow closed his eyes again, and she could see the tension gripping his body begin to dissipate. He lifted one finger, pointing towards his side. ‘… Most of my ribs on this side are unbroken. I can’t say the same for the other side.’
She leaned down and rested one hand on his side, kissing his bandaged torso. He made a soft noise, and she kissed him again, moving her hand slightly to keep her balance. But the moment her hand grazed his hip, he winced and took a deep breath.
Rouge yanked her hand away as though she’d been burned. ‘I-I’m sorry. I…’
‘It’s fine.’ He glanced down at his legs and grimaced. ‘I broke my hip in half a dozen places.’
‘D-Did they give you a hip replacement?’
‘No.’ He laughed weakly and said, ‘They wanted to. They said it would help with my mobility. But my bones regenerate, so it wouldn’t work. They just put everything back together with metal plates and screws. They’ll take them out eventually.’
Rouge’s wings drooped, and she lifted the bedclothes slightly, revealing a swathe of bandages. ‘A-Are they giving you enough medication?’
‘More than enough. My system can’t even process it quickly enough.’ His fingers twitched as he clumsily gestured towards himself. ‘Which is why I’m like… this.’
She didn’t need to ask what he meant by this. His slurred speech and semi-consciousness were more than enough evidence that he was heavily drugged. ‘At least you’re not in too much pain.’ She fidgeted with the seam of one of her gloves. ‘Right?’
‘Right,’ Shadow said, and his voice was gentle. ‘I’ll heal eventually.’
Something about her tone of voice struck her as odd, and she turned to face him more fully. ‘Eventually? I thought your healing factor would be working overtime by now.’
Shadow grimaced. ‘I abused my powers too much. Using Chaos Control to cross that warzone, destroying the missile silos, and withstanding the explosion… It all took a lot out of me.’ His lashes drooped, and he yawned.
‘Can’t you be more careful?’
‘If you recall, we were on the brink of nuclear war. Time was of the essence.’
‘Hmph.’
‘“Hmph”?’ He cracked a tired smile. ‘Are you taking a leaf out of my book?’
‘I don’t want to argue with you. You need to rest.’
He watched her for a moment, wondering if she would cave in and start bickering with him anyway. But when she didn’t speak, his gaze softened. ‘Thank you.’
‘Mm.’
Shadow lifted his hand, placing it on hers. He stroked the back of her hand with her thumb. ‘You know, there’s another reason why I asked them to make you wait. I had to go through nuclear decontamination.’
Rouge felt something twist in her chest. The idea of there being an overlap where he was gravely injured but unable to be treated by GUN’s medical officers was more cruel than words could express. But that didn’t seem to be what he was focusing on. A faint hint of colour lit his cheeks. ‘I thought it would be nicer like this.’
Rouge felt a faint smile tug at her lips. She turned and gently rested her hand on his chest, using as light a touch as possible. ‘Like this?’
A familiar warmth lit his eyes. ‘Reuniting in the same room, rather than on opposite sides of a glass wall.’
She tilted her head and asked, ‘Is there anywhere else that you aren’t hurt, handsome?’
He lifted one hand, pointing towards his face. Then his hand fell back to his pillow. ‘Somehow, I managed not to sustain any major head injuries.’
‘Isn’t that convenient?’
‘I thought so.’ His eyes twinkled in a rare display of humour. ‘I also thought I might get a reward for my efforts.’
Rouge bit back a smile and said, ‘Did you now?’ She carefully leaned forward and braced her forearms on the bed, on either side of him. Her chest brushed against his shoulder, and he nestled into her, resting his hand on her forearm.
She pressed a long, soft kiss to his cheek, and she felt the faint texture of fresh scratches against her lips. He made a quiet noise at the back of his throat, and she kissed him again. His eyes were closed, but he was very much awake. She could feel the gentle pressure of his claws as he weakly kneaded her forearm, like a cat that was enjoying being petted.
‘You like that?’
‘Mm.’
She kissed the edge of his jaw, and he turned his head toward her, revealing the crook of his neck. She buried her face in the hollow, cradling his shoulders with one arm. He made a soft noise and lifted one arm, letting it rest around her neck. He couldn’t support the weight of his own limbs, and the result was a warm, heavy embrace.
She kissed his neck, softly at first. But then he made a faint keening noise, squeezing her forearm. She half-smiled and obliged, kissing him so deeply that the beeping of his heart rate monitor spiked. A faint purr rumbled in his throat, and she felt the pressure of his arm on her back, coaxing her to lie with him.
‘I still don’t know the extent of your injuries,’ Rouge said, placing her hand on his side, where he had told her that his ribs were unbroken. ‘Are you sure that this is a good idea?’
‘I’ll be fine. Besides. If something hurts, you can always kiss it better.’
Rouge raised her eyebrows. ‘Are you feeling all right?’
‘I’m fine. Just sky-high on meds.’ He gave her an exhausted smile and said, ‘I don’t even know if I’ll remember this later. ‘
‘Trust me, darling, I think you’ll find this quite hard to forget.’
Rouge placed a hand on his oxygen mask and gave him a questioning look. When he nodded, she lowered it and kissed him on the lips. He tasted bitter. Like antiseptics, blood, and chemicals. But she didn’t pull away, and she didn’t break the kiss. She kept coming back for more. She teased his lips with her fangs until he whimpered with pleasure, but that merely allowed her to kiss him more deeply. She could taste medicine on his tongue, and he lifted his hand from her shoulders to her head, knotting his fingers into her curls.
‘Easy,’ Rouge murmured. ‘You’ll rip your stitches.’
He grunted with frustration, and she fought the urge to tease him. Maybe it was unfair to whet his appetite like this when he couldn’t even lift his head to kiss her. She could tell that he wanted more than what his body would permit him to indulge in. His hand was heavy on her back, and she could imagine that it must feel nicer to hold a body rather than a hard-edged weapon.
‘Easy, love. I’ll still be here once your hip heals.’
‘I don’t want to wait that long,’ Shadow muttered, but there was a warmth to his voice. It was almost strange seeing him like this. Uninhibited, relaxed, and willing to demonstrate his affections. Maybe his brush with death had loosened his self-control, or maybe his faculties had just been affected by the drugs coursing through his system.
He took her in his arms, and she rested one arm on his waist, slipping the other beneath his head, holding him close. His purr faded, and he slumped into her arms. His breathing sounded laboured. When she clasped her hands behind his back, she could feel sweat trickling down it.
‘Are you all right?’ Rouge asked.
‘I’m fine,’ Shadow said, but when she looked at his face, she saw that he had taken on a sickly pallor.
‘Are you sure about that?’
He muttered something under his breath, then he said, ‘… Can you pass me those?’
She turned and saw a container of pills sitting on a small tray table attached to the bed. As soon as she’d helped him take them and wash them down with water, he sank back into her arms. He seemed feverish. ‘Sweetheart?’ Her ears flattened, and she turned, staring at the glass window of the observation room. She caught a brief glimpse of Abraham standing on the other side, and she swiftly turned away.
‘It’s just a reaction to the anaesthetic.’ Shadow lifted one hand, weakly pushing at the bedcovers, and she hurriedly pulled them all the way back. His legs were covered in bandages.
When she turned back to him, she noticed that his gaze was fixed on the window of the observation room. His eyes flickered, and one of his ears twitched. He looked uncomfortable.
‘Shadow?’ She leaned forward, resting a hand on his side.
‘It’s nothing.’
‘No, it’s not.’
He lay in silence for a moment. ‘... It’s just awkward whenever this happens.’ She caught a glimpse of silhouettes moving on the other side of the glass, and he said. ‘I don’t think anyone at GUN likes being reminded of the fact that I can get injured.’
‘Well, that’s too bad. They can learn to be empathetic.’
‘That’s not it. They’re not worried about me. They’re worried about the fact that their strongest weapon is still capable of taking damage.’ He clenched his fist, digging his claws into his palm. ‘It’s not like I failed. I took a calculated risk. I knew this would be the outcome… but they can’t help but see it as a failure.’ Pain flashed across his face. ‘But I didn’t fail. I didn’t.’
Rouge glanced over her shoulder, shooting a sharp glare at the people behind the glass. Then she lay down beside him again, propped up on one elbow. Her wings curved around him, sheltering him from prying eyes and security cameras. ‘Of course not, love. You saved the world. That’s more important than GUN’s peace of mind. You don’t owe them that.’ She cupped his face in her hand and asked, ‘What have they been saying?’
‘Nothing. They don’t dare to say anything. But they look at me, and…’ Shadow lowered his gaze.
‘Then don’t give them the luxury of looking away. Make them look. Make them uncomfortable. Make them learn to live with it.’
‘…Hmph.’
She settled in with him, lowering her wings slightly, affording them privacy while not hiding the extent of his injuries from view. He placed his arm on her waist and rested his head against her shoulder. His eyes flickered closed again, and she rested her hand on his head, massaging the base of his ear, between the patches of gauze. ‘Just rest, sweetheart. You must be exhausted.’
He nodded, and his ear brushed against her chest. The edge of it was torn, and it felt like velvet on her skin. ‘Now… Where were we?’ His crimson eyes glowed in the near darkness, ringed with cyan from the medical monitors.
Rouge could feel the corners of her eyes crease in a smile. ‘I don’t quite remember…’
Shadow rolled his eyes, grabbed her by the waist with one hand, and kissed her, holding her close. ‘There. We were right there.’
‘Just lie still,’ Rouge murmured, cotton bandages and fur beneath her lips. ‘Let me do the work.’
His tail twitched beneath the sheets, and he began to purr faintly once more. ‘What else is new—’
‘Agent Rouge?’ a female voice asked flatly. Rouge sighed and looked over her shoulder. One of GUN’s biotechnicians handed her a brochure. ‘Apparently, I have to give this to the two of you?’
‘In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve got better things to be doing than reading,’ Rouge said dryly. But when the woman didn’t move, Rouge took the brochure, and the woman left the room as quickly as possible. ’What’s her problem?’ She looked down and scoffed.
‘What is it?’
‘“Safe sex positions for after hip surgery”—’
Shadow choked, then clutched his ribs and swore. She thought she also heard a faint laugh, but she might have been mistaken.
Rouge waved the brochure in the air, towards the window. ‘Don’t give us ideas! You might want to turn the cameras off—‘
She heard a sharp, hacking cough – one she recognised as Abe’s after catching him off guard too many times – and he promptly left the observation room, with the attending biomedical officers racing after him. A metal shutter promptly slammed down over the window, and the security cameras’ lights switched off.
Rouge cackled and looked back down at Shadow. To her surprise, he was looking up at her with a grin on his face. A weak chuckle left his lips. ‘They really thought you were serious.’
‘And you didn’t?’
Shadow shrugged one shoulder. Then his expression softened. His hand lay palm up on the bed, and he looked at her in a way that made her mind go blank. ‘Come here,’ he murmured.
They were already close, lying side by side, but it occurred to Rouge that they could be so much closer. She dropped the brochure and embraced him, hugging his uninjured parts as delicately as if she were picking a lock. He melted into her kisses, and his fingers wrapped around the roots of her wings.
‘I’ll be more careful next time,’ he whispered. ‘…I don’t like having to hold back when I’m with you.’
He tasted sweeter this time. Less bloody. Fewer chemicals. His pulse quickened, blood rushing through his veins as his body tried to heal itself. He felt so warm. Part of her thought it was regrettable that his body always erased the evidence of what he had endured, but another part of her was grateful that he didn’t have to bear the physical scars of his efforts.
‘You never like holding back,’ she whispered into his neck. ‘On the battlefield or in bed.’
‘You make me lose my self-control. You get under my skin. You’re so…’
He didn’t have to say it. She knew. She was warmth and softness and white fur and golden skin and cherry lip balm, and he always came undone in her arms. He always recovered faster when she stayed by his side. He always waited as long as possible to tell her that he had fully recovered, because he liked receiving extra affection and care, even though his pride wouldn’t let him admit it.
‘Get well soon, sweetheart. I love you.’
Shadow nestled into her. His kisses were becoming drowsy, and his grip loosened, but he still clung to her. He nodded, and his lashes brushed her collarbone. ‘…I love you too.’
The End
