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It’s been three weeks. Three weeks since he had been in a coma only to wake up on the day that the doctors decided to take him off the ventilator after weeks of no apparent recovery. Three weeks since he woke up to the tearful faces of Chloe, Trixie, Amenadiel, and surprisingly Mazikeen and Linda. Three weeks since Chloe brought him to her home.
She had insisted he stay with her but he got the undertone message loud and clear.
“I don’t want you pulling such a stunt like that again.”
Linda had visited him every day, profusely apologizing to him on the day he woke up and later when she first visited him in Chloe’s home.
“I am so sorry, Lucifer. If I hadn’t retracted my offer, if only I hadn’t reacted with shock and fear, perhaps then you would never have attempted to take your own life.” She had cried, which only made him squirm uncomfortably watching the human whom had been first his sex partner, then his psychiatrist, and finally his friend break down.
He had forgiven her, telling her that it wasn’t her fault. Which wasn’t a completely blatant lie. Other factors had played into the role of his decision not just her. Mazikeen, Amenadiel, Chloe, and Trixie had all done the same, apologizing to him for leaving him out all alone, but out of the five, it was Trixie’s apology that only drove a searing knife into his heart.
She had been bawling and sobbing on his lap with her face buried in his chest apologizing repeatedly for kicking him out and telling him that it was all her fault.
A lump formed in his throat as guilt came surging forth once more for no child should ever bear the heavy weight of guilt and the poison of self-blame and he ran a hand down the child’s back comfortingly. “It’s alright, child. It’s alright. I forgive you.” He had told her repeatedly comforting her until she fell asleep out of sheer exhaustion.
Even with his final act, he still managed to hurt people closest to him. That was what he was only good at. Hurting people and leaving them either dead or in tears. The very memory of Uriel brought an old, familiar in his chest and it wasn’t from his weak heart.
That was another thing that he was ridden with. A weak heart. He laughed weakly. How the mighty have indeed fallen. He had become so weak, so fragile just like his cracked soul. The body had finally caught up with the soul.
So far he had done a pretty good job of putting on a show of recovering from his ordeal and from the issues that led him to take the blade upon himself. If only they knew.
He didn’t deserve to feel joy. Didn’t deserve to laugh or smile when his brother’s blood coated his hands. Didn’t deserve to be loved after he had hurt the people closest to him.
Just then, the door to the apartment slammed open and Lucifer jumped a bit. Turning his head over his shoulder, he sees his Mother step inside concern marring her features.
“Lucifer. Oh Lucifer, what happened to you?” She asked.
Lucifer only bowed his head, refusing to meet his Mother’s concerned gaze. “Nothing.”
“Nothing? Lucifer, this is clearly not ‘nothing’!” She takes his face between her palms and lifts his head up to meet her, “I heard from Amenadiel. What could ever possibly possess you to do such a thing? Did you have any idea how worried I had been and all this time I had been with that wretched family not knowing what happened to my dear boy?”
Lucifer kept silent, not knowing what to say or dare to say a word lest it upset Charlotte even more.
“Is it that human and her spawn? Did they make you force your hand upon yourself?” Charlotte said with narrowed eyes. She was going to make those humans pay for hurting her son be it emotionally or physically.
“Leave them alone, Mother.” That only confirmed Charlotte’s suspicions.
“That’s it. I will personally see to it that they will pay for their crimes.”
“YOU WILL DO NO SUCH THING!” Lucifer roared, his dark orbs flashing a fiery red and the whites of his eyes turning into an onyx color within seconds.
“Why not? Lucifer, they hurt you!”
“I DON’T CARE! I WILL NOT LET YOU HURT THEM, MOTHER!” He yelled enraged at Charlotte’s threat. The very thought of Chloe and Trixie either insane or worse dead sent a spike of ice through his heart.
“If I hear so much as a peep that you did something to them be it directly or indirectly, I will not hesitate personally sending you to Hell myself.” Lucifer growled out. He didn’t care if he wounded up in Hell and never be able to return back to Los Angeles what with the loss of his wings. But so long as Chloe and Trixie were safe then he could rest easy.
“I also deserve to be in Hell anyways.” He thought sadly although ending his life by Azrael’s blade was a much better option but that was now out of the question since Amenadiel had taken it and hid it someplace in Los Angeles.
“But-!”
“Do NOT test me, Mother!” He sneered, his face shifting into his other form.
Charlotte was taken aback at her son’s vehement defense and protectiveness of the two humans. This wasn’t good. His time on Earth was changing him and she needed him to return home. He had Amenadiel on her side but she wanted Lucifer too to help her take back their home.
“Lucifer, they hurt you. You wouldn’t have tolerated this before. Your time on Earth is changing you and not for the better. Don’t you want to return home?”
“NO! I have no home, Mother! Never have and never will!”
“But son-!”
“Get out. Just get out.” He growled and turned away, refusing to meet his mother’s face. He didn’t know if he could handle the lid on his temper if he did.
Charlotte stared at his son as if he had grown another head. She wanted to shake some sense into him but with how he was now, it would be best if she left him to cool down first. She would come again and next time, she would get Lucifer to her side.
“Okay son. I’m going now. Goodbye.” She goes to run a hand through his hair just as she used to do when he was much younger only for him to shift away from her. Hurt bubbled up inside Charlotte at his cold dismissal and she nodded, getting off the couch and quietly left the detective’s home.
It was only then did Lucifer let himself cry silent tears.
Meanwhile above in the dark corners of Heaven, an angel with long flowing dark blue hair almost akin to black and pale, ashen skin sat watching her older brother weep with a stone cold expression but deep down she longed to go comfort her brother. She never was good with emotions.
If only her Father hadn’t ordered her to sit back and not collect her blade.
It is all part of the Plan.
Plan or no plan, Lucifer did not deserve to suffer this. Nor did Uriel and Amenadiel. She felt a twinge of sorrow at the thought of her little brother. Now a cold corpse buried in a grave up in the hills of Los Angeles, never to return home.
Uriel you stubborn idiot.