Chapter Text
My day started off as normal. Bad things always happened when things were normal, I've noticed. Like the universe likes to catch you off guard. My parents died on a semi-normal day. Only special thing about it was Darry's birthday. Dally and Johnny died on a normal day— Well, as normal as a day can be when you're locked up in a church hiding from a murder charge. Today seemed like it was a normal day. And I had high hopes it would be a good one. I woke up to the smell of pancakes (or waffles, they smelled the same) cooking in the kitchen. Soda wasn't next to me which made me a little uneasy. Not because I needed him next to me, but because I had a feeling that Darry wasn't the one in the kitchen.
As much as I played up the hatred for Soda's cooking, I didn't mind it. I found it endearing. He might be terrible at it and take any opportunity to make anything he's cooking look like the textbook definition of unappitizing—but he's trying. Sometimes can't tell if he's doing it to get a kick out of us, or if he wants to make it easier on Darry. I'm pretty sure that's what he wants, though.
I open the door and head into the kitchen where my worst fears are realized. I see Soda at the oven slaving over some weird blue concoction in a pan.
"What are those even supposed to be?" I grumble, my voice was still groggy from sleep.
"What, you can't tell?" He smiled at me. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes fondly. I stayed for a minute, silently admiring how someone could mess up something as simple as eggs, before realizing I was a human person who needed to speak.
"No. I can't." I humored him. I could tell a punchline was coming.
"They're a special kind of egg—made from a blue chicken. Me and Steve went duck huntin' last week and found a few."
"With what gun? Dad's?" I scoff, and saw him crack a smile. Nobody dared to touch that gun unless absolutely necessary. It was too early in the morning to get into much deeper than that one off sentence so I changed the topic."Darry at work?" I knew the answer already, I don't know why I asked.
"Yeah. Tryin' to pick up a few more hours."
"Why?" I sigh. "He works hard enough."
"Said somethin' about unexpected expenses." He trailed off.
I scoffed, leaning against the fridge to continue the conversation. "You don't actually believe that, do you Soda?"
"Nah, not really. But I'll humor him. As long as he's takin' care of himself..." There was something that he wasn't telling me, but I let it go for now.
I hummed to myself, reaching for a smoke. Darry told me to cut back, especially since everything that went down in Windrexville but I can't help it. If anything even thinking about that week made me want to smoke more.
I didn't even do it to look tuff anymore. It was a nasty habit, but something I couldn't knock.
I needed something to do with my Saturday. I finished the book I was reading and until the next paycheck I couldn't get a new one, and God help me if I ever catch myself in a Soc library. They may have cut back on the jumping, but they ain't kind.
"Ya think Two'll buy me a book if I ask nicely?" I say, half as a joke. I couldn't believe myself. Most greasers were begging for more combs, a switchblade, Hell, half the time a decent meal— Here I was begging for a new book.
"Maybe." Soda shrugged, genuinly believing it. Two-bit had become softer these days. After the dust had settled a little, he kept bringing us food. Said his mom insisted.
I don't know how much I believe that, but Darry never complained.
We saved a lot on groceries the first month.
Soda plated the eggs and I politely declined. Throughout the months I'd significantly cut back on eating. I used to eat like a horse but I just wasn't hungry. When it first happened, I told Darry the truth, that I just wasn't hungry. When Soda asked, I told him that I was worried about the costs with everything else going on.
Neither of those were lies, but they weren't full truths either. Because the truth was I don't know why I quit eating. I just… did. I took smaller portions, sometimes skipped full meals. It became a nasty habit— like smoking.
After that, I ate so little that I'm pretty sure my body just got used to it. I had little appetite anymore.
Soda shot me a concerned look. I brushed it off. "I'll eat later."
"Okay, but you better make good on that, Savvy?"
"Yeah, yeah." I mumbled. I probably would have something later, but it would be more lunch than breakfast. "I'm gonna head to the lot, see if I can't track down Two-bit."
"Be careful." Soda said, though he had a grin on his face like he always did. I don't know how he did it. How he stayed so… optimistic even at the dullest of moments. I mean— I guess I did too sometimes but Soda was constant.
I wondered if Darry ever did, but kept it to himself. He wasn't big on feelings.
I wandered out of the house, a cancer stick still hanging from my mouth and walked my way down to the lot. It was weird… being here in the morning and not seeing Johnny passed out somewhere. It's been months, I knew not to expect it but it still felt wrong.
I was told that feeling would go away with time— I dunno by who—maybe myself with all the daydreaming I do, but the feeling lingered. It honestly only got worse as everyday I believed more and more in my gut that he wasn't gonna be there. Yet everyday I found myself checking.
"PONY!" I heard a cackle as I jumped out of my skin. "Holy shit man, you're jumpy as hell today." Two-bit patted my shoulder as he continued to cackle. "God, I don't even have to try."
"Yeah, yeah." I grumble, a little embarressed on how jumpy I'd been since everything. Glory, now I understood how Johnny felt.
Two-bit must have seen this, and lightened up a little. "C'mon, I'm only teasing."
"I know." I sigh, but I can't crack a smile. "Say, you wouldn't mind taking me to the bookstore? I finished mine and I'd be damned to hell if I step foot in a soc building."
"Ah, come on they don't bite." Two grinned gigantically, "Only bark when adults are around." He snickered.
"Still ain't goin'."
Two thought for a little bit before sighing. "Yeah, alright let's get you your nerd books, nerd."
I wasn't sure if Two-bit would have done this for me months prior. Truth be told, after everything me and him sorta grew closer. Him, Steve, and my brothers were all I had now. And If I'm being honest, I never cared for Steve that much. He was nice enough and way closer with Soda than he'd ever be with me. But he was still part of the gang.
"What do you even read, anyway?" Two-bit asked as they walked. He could have driven our truck but we liked walking just fine. Like I said, weather was nice that day. Normal day.
"I dunno, anything. I like deep stuff, I guess. Poems…" I trailed off, half expecting him to double over in laughter but to my surprise he didn't.
"Never really gave a shit about that stuff." Two-bit said. "I think seein' it is much more fun than readin' it. Plus it takes so damn long."
I snort. "Maybe you should spend less time eating chocolate cake five inches from the screen, then."
"Can't see good then." Two-bits grin returned. "Makes ya feel like you're really in it, y'know."
"Books do it better." I shrug. "I guess it's sorta an escape."
Two sucks in a breath. "Lord knows we all need an escape after everything."
I didn't need to be booksmart to know what he was reffering to.
Two-bit spoiled me, and I didn't know why. I hadn't done anything to deserve it. It wasn't my birthday, I didn't get any achievements at school, and track was nothing special. We just walked in and told me to go nuts. I still only got a few books but I could tell he was prepared for me to pick out way more.
"I was thinkin' of heading to the drive-in tonight. New space movie supposed to be real good. You wanna tag along?"
"Which drive-in?" I asked, already knowing the answer. He wanted to go to Nightly Double.
I loved movies, but ever since everything happened I couldn't bring myself to go to that drive-in yet, if ever again. Any other movie house or drive was completely fine. But even the thought of stepping foot in the place that might have started all of this was slightly nauseating.
"Nightly." Two-bit said without a second thought. I sucked in a breath and tried to think of what to say to him. Preferably something that would lead to little to no questioning.
"I'm good tonight, Two. I think I might stay in and read the books. Thanks again, by the way."
Two-bit looked at me in befuzzlement. "Fuck you mean you don't want to go to the movies?"
"I just… I'm tired is all." I shrug it off.
He seemed disappointed but nodded. We walked in silence for a minute or two before Two-bit piped up again.
"So which theater you been going to instead?" He asked innocently.
"What?"
"Since you've been avoiding that one like the plague, which one you been sneakin' into instead?"
Two-bit didn't accuse like I thought he would. Instead he was genuinely curious.
"Pinecrest the- The one a bit farther." I admit quietly. I don't know why I stammered. I never really admitted to anyone that I'd been going to a different theater. I guess I was afraid it made me look less tuff. To be scared of a drive in. Scared wasn't the right word, but it got the point across.
Two-Bit hummed. "Never been."
"It's nice. Lotta Soc girls. I don't think they know they're Soc girls either. Just regular old people."
"They pretty?"
I nod, mostly to get Two-Bit to shut up. In all honestly I didn't pay that much attention to the girls at Pinecrest. Well other than there were girls at Pinecrest, and they dressed like Socs. I was there for the movies, not the 'broads' as Dally would call them.
Two-Bit took me home and I read for a bit, then picked me up again to take me to Pinecrest. Darry still wasn't home so Two just told Soda to relay the message. We got to the Moviehouse and I realized what Two-Bit was trying to get me to see, and it kinda felt like a slap in the face.
2001 A Space Oddesy. I'd heard all about it. Darry gave me the movie section when he was done reading about football in the paper and the movie got raving reviews.
"I knew this was playing, you could have just said the name-"
"I wasn't remembering that shit." Two-Bit laughed as we made our way to our seats. To be fair, I should have just assumed from 'space movie'—especially coming from Two-Bit.
And the movie— Glory, it was something. I hadn't seen a movie that good without Newman in it since… I wasn't sure. I'm not sure Two-Bit got it though.
"So the ship turned evil?" He asked as we walked in the darkness.
"Kind of. The code malfunctioned." I explained it in simpler terms and he seemed to understand a bit better. I knew Two-Bit didn't dig movies like I did, so I wasn't really sure why he wanted to take me out like this. The books, the movies…
"What's this about, anyway?" I ask him.
"What's what about?"
I gesture to the bag i'm still hauling around with books. "The spree you took me on today?"
"Oh." Two-Bit shrugs. "You seemed a bit down, figured I'd treat ya some. Plus, I owe it to you and your brothers seeing how much I hang around your house."
"You don't owe us anything, Two-Bit."
Staying was enough. Staying after everything.
"Think I owe ya about twenty dollars worth of cake ingredients, actually." He joked, jumping me out of my soon to spiral daydreaming.
"Talk that over with Darry."
"He won't listen either, and I'm pretty sure if I put the money in the hands of Sodapop he'd buy a year supply of food coloring" He shrugged. "Now quiet gettin' sappy."
I looked up at the stars and ignored his request. "We missed the sunset." I muttered absentmindedly. The nice thing about the old drive in was that you could go before dark, sit on the roof of your car and watch as the sun slowly descended into the sky, painting it golds, purples, and oranges. With Pinecrest it was indoors, so when you get there as it's going down, by the time you get out it's fully black.
"Well, I heard there's one scheduled for the morning." Two-Bit smirked and I couldn't help but crack a small grin as well. "Tomorrow night, too." He added on.
"Wonder if they'll continue the next morning."
"Guess we'll have to wait and see, kid."
We talked most of the walk home with thankfully no Socs in sight. Must have better things to do than mess with a bunch of greasers. I still never felt safe walking on the streets alone anymore, even with my switchblade. But Two-Bit was bigger than me, and I was sure if any Socs rolled up on us he'd kick their ass. I'd seen him in rumbles. Better yet, I saw him when they jumped me coming out of the movie house.
Glory, I don't think I'd ever seen him that mad. That and when Johnny was jumped.
When we came up on the lot I knew we were almost home, and I thanked the powers that be. I was tired. I don't know what it was, usually I was fine at this hour but right now all I wanted was to crash into my bed. Maybe it was because I barely ate all day. I was pretty sure I only had lunch, now that I thought about it. Two-Bit was going on about some cartoon but I only half listened. As if it was instinct I glared into the lot and looked at the place he always curled up. My blood went cold as I froze on the pavement, staring at a familiar silhouette laying in the exact spot. The same position I found him in time and time again back when everything was normal.
Back when everything was fine.
"And he-" Two-Bit stopped mid sentence. "Kid?"
I didn't grant him a reply. I stared for another few seconds as if trying to confirm what I was seeing was true. I couldn't stand it anymore and bolted into the lot. I got close enough to tell that was his Jean jacket. That was his hair. That was his switchblade in his pocket. That was-
As soon as I came to a halt, I blinked and he was gone. I stared at the ground for a few seconds which felt like hours.
"Johnny?" I whispered, my voice coming out squeaky and broken. I didn't care. It wasn't like anybody could hear me… I knew that now.
"Pony, what the hell?!" Two-Bit asked through the fence. I didn't know how to reply to him. He was just-
He was just there. I saw him.
I heard Two-bit walking up towards me. This time I didn't jump when I felt his hand on my shoulder.
"The hell is wrong?" He asked, gentler. It must have looked like I'd seen a ghost.
I wasn't sure if I actually did or not, but it sure felt like it.
"I thought-" My eyes darted back to the area Johnny was laying, where just a second ago I could have sworn…
"Pony, It's late and I already know I'm gonna get an earful from Superman when we get back to your place. Let's get going before it turns into a full on lecture." He flashed me one of his signature smiles but it didn't do me any reassurance.
"Yeah, Alright." I mumble, staring back at the spot one last time as if it's gonna will Johnny back into existence.
I staggered backwards before turning around and following Two-Bit. We didn't say a word the rest of the way home.
"You say you were takin' him to the movies, not a four hour long date!" Darry scolded, but it was at Two-Bit instead of me. He'd stopped doing it as often. He still did it—glory he did, but it surely wasn't like before.
Not to the extent that made me believe he hated me.
"Relax, we got a little sidetracked." Two-Bit grinned. Darry was not amused.
"Did he eat?"
Two blinked at him. "I bought him books."
"For fucks sake, Keith." He muttered under his breath.
This concerned me for a plethora of reasons.
A. I rarely if ever heard Darry swear, esspecially in front of me, and
B. I rarely ever heard ANYONE say Two-Bits real name.
It seemed to even catch him a bit off guard.
"Dar, you alright?" Soda asked from the couch.
"Oh, just great Soda. Two-Bit brings Pony home way later than he said he would and didn't even feed him."
I wanted to sink into the couch cushions. Was this how Soda felt? Glory— He had some apologies to make.
"I can make him some food, Darry. It ain't no big deal." Soda said, putting his hands up.
"That ain't the point, Soda."
Two-Bit looks torn between making another joke and booking it out of there.
"Then what is? He bought Pony books and took him to a movie. He had a good day, lay off."
"It's late." Darry growled.
"It's barely 10."
"Which means he missed dinner and-"
"Two-Bit, I think you should go." Soda sighed, cutting Darry off.
"No- No he can stay." Darry said. "And explain what exactly he was doin' with Pony that late and not even thinkin' to feedin' him."
"No, I think you need to explain the way you're actin' tonight." Soda confronts. It isn't scary or mean, just stern.
"Cya Pony, Cya Soda." Two-Bit mumbles a goodbye to Darry as well but it's unheard to the two of my brothers as he books it off the porch. Darry slams the door and I take the opportunity to hide in my room.
Something ain't right with Darry.
And I ain't so sure everything's right with me.