Archive of Our Own

The cell isn't terrible as far as cells go. She has it to herself at least, unlike most of the others in this place. While she might not have been deemed dangerous enough for complete solitary, they can't risk her spending hours unsupervised with another inmate. She doesn't have the power she once held but she still has some influence.

"Stratt."

Eva sits on the thin mattress, blanket wrapped around her shoulders, and book held perfectly in one hand. She glances up through the bars at the officer on the other side. He holds two paper cups in his hands and the air is cool enough that the steam is visible drifting up out of the small holes in the lid. "Afternoon, Lange."

Lange glances up and down the hall then lifts the cups a bit. "I have brought your request."

She smiles and stands, ensuring the blanket stays around her. "Thank you. How is your family?"

"They are well," he softly responds as he passes the drinks through the bars. "Peter has raised his grades. We're very proud of him."

"I'm glad to hear it." Eva sets one cup down on the small desk and wraps both hands around the second, grateful for the warmth.

Lange crosses his arms. He watches as she takes a slow sip of coffee then clears his throat. "Do you know what day it is?"

She hums. "Yes, I'm quite aware. It is November 7, 2045. It has been twelve years since I was tried and sentenced, to the day. I don't lose track easily."

"I think what you did was necessary."

Eva sighs. "Of course it was. And I know you do. You told me this when we first met. Doesn't change anything."

He gives a minute shake of his head. "I know. Enjoy." He bobs his head toward the cups then walks away.

She returns to her place back on her bed, picking up her book once again. But she finds she can't focus. After several minutes of re-reading the same sentence she finally puts it down. She stares at herself in the mirror on the wall across from her. An older woman stares back. She has spent all these years watching herself age: the slow spread of wrinkles lining her face and the grey hairs highlighting the blonde strands. Stress had meant it all appeared much sooner than it should have but what else could one expect from leading the project to save the world? Assuming everything has gone well with the Hail Mary. She's pragmatic. She knows there was plenty that could have gone wrong and plenty that could have gone right. The ship is humanity's saving grace—

"Is it true that you sent Dr. Ryland Grace on the Hail Mary mission without his consent?"

Behind the stand, Eva's legs tensed. But she'd had years of practice carefully schooling her face into the perfect mask. She stared at the prosecutor standing smugly in front of her. Behind him, her own lawyer (more a formality than anything) gave her a look that said he had no idea how that information had found itself in her attacker's hands. Inside her still closed mouth she pressed the tip of tongue against her canine — hard. After a few seconds she leaned forward and stated clearly into the mic: "Yes, I did."

Off to her left, she could see a few of the jurors shift in their seats. She ignored them.

The prosecutor nodded. "And, considering that it is a one way trip, one could view this as you murdering Dr. Grace."

Eva clenched her fist in her lap. Her voice was even as she responded, "If you stretch the definition of murder it could be construed that way."

"Did you or did you not send Dr. Grace to his death, which he did not volunteer for?"

"I did."

"Are you above such laws to force an unwilling person to die?"

"I was at the time."

He rapped the wood in front of her with his knuckles as he turned to face the rest of the room. He opened his mouth to speak but Eva continued.

"A reminder that I was elected to lead the efforts against Astrophage, to save humanity. Dr. Grace's presence was required for project Hail Mary to succeed. He was the most qualified as he had the most experience with Astrophage and the project overall. That paired with his having the coma-resistance gene meant he was our best option."

There were some low murmurs from the audience. The prosecutor watched her with steely eyes. "How do you not know that he hasn't sabotaged the mission? A man angry at being forced to die might do drastic things."

From the look on his face, Eva could tell that he already knew the answer to this. No point in hiding. "Amnesia. We gave Dr. Grace drugs after he'd been placed into the coma that would ensure he would not remember the events leading up to how he got on the ship. It meant that he would not sabotage the mission. He would work diligently. And by the time he did remember the truth, he would already be too deep into the work to want to do anything to hinder it. Dr. Grace was a good man." The last sentence was a surprise even to herself.

"There you have it," he turned in a slow circle as the courtroom all but exploded into a commotion at the admittance, "another sin for Eva Stratt on an already long list. An innocent man, a good man, sent to die against his will and purposely forced to forget his lack of consent."

Eva stared down at her hands as the bang of the judge's gavel echoed throughout the room.

It's getting colder. But that's to be expected. It's November in the Netherlands. And it has been almost twenty-six years since the Hail Mary launched. They'd only set the nukes off once more in Antarctica shortly before her trial; they decided after that they would not do so again. There was so much being thrown out of balance they didn't want to add any additional risk. It was why she'd been in charge in the first place: all risks were easily accepted and easily tallied against her.

Eva pulls the layers of blankets closer around her shoulders, having added two more. The prison's heating system does its best but even it struggles to keep up with the unnatural freeze that perpetually wraps around every building now. Through her window, wisps of sunlight fight their way into the room. A shudder rolls through her limbs and her muscles ache. Perhaps she is coming down with something.

"Stratt," Lange is back by her cell. "You have a visitor."

She sighs. "Someone I actually would like to see?" There's been plenty throughout the years that have come wanting to write what they call her side of the story. She's turned every one of them away.

Lange gives a small nod. "I wouldn't retrieve you if I thought otherwise. Come."

He unlocks her door and steps aside. She drops two of the blankets but keeps the third and steps out. Lange doesn't reprimand her. He only falls into step next to her as they make their way down the hall.

"Who is it?" Eva ventures to ask.

Lange says nothing and she frowns slightly. Whoever it is must have asked that their identity not be revealed. And yet it is someone he feels that she would like to see. She clutches the edges of the blanket tight in her fist as her mind unwillingly recalls the last time she'd had a visitor.

The room is bare save for the table and chair in the middle of it. As she was guided toward it, Eva caught sight through the window of an unfamiliar woman sitting there. When the door opened, the woman stood and stared at Eva as though she couldn't believe her eyes. Eva almost turned to the guard to tell them to take her back to her cell — the last thing she wanted to deal with was someone who worshiped the ground she walked on — when the stranger cleared her throat and asked in a small voice, "Miss Stratt?"

Her accent was clearly American. Eva gave a small bow of her head. "I'm sorry. I don't do interviews or talk about the project or anything like that."

The woman quickly shook her head. "N-No. I'm not here for that. I'm Theresa Maguire. I…I was one of Mr. Grace's students all those years ago."

Eva had almost felt her heart still in her chest. Slowly she took the seat opposite of Theresa, folding her hands on top of the table. "I see…Why are you here?"

Theresa retook her seat, brushing dark curls out of her face. "You know…I'm not entirely sure. It's been what? Nineteen years since I had him? But it's not every day that your teacher leaves in the middle of the school year to go save the world. Not that that's how I remember him! Mr. Grace was genuinely one of the greatest teachers I ever had. He helped me love science. He's part of the reason I decided to go into biology, actually."

"Is that so?" Every word drilled deep into Eva like a barb.

"It is. And I guess technically I should I have introduced myself as Dr. Theresa Maguire but I'm still not used to that."

"You're here for some reason, doctor. I'd still like to know why."

She sighed and began to twist a ring on her finger. "I wanted to meet you face to face. I remember seeing you in the halls back then. You'd looked so intimidating. I just wanted to…I don't know." She met Eva's gaze. "Was he happy working on your project?"

There it is, Eva thought. She closed her eyes for a few seconds. When she opened them again, she sighed. "He was. I feel like I can say that. He was our primary scientist on Astrophage. He loved studying it, explaining it, helping to develop the means to get the Hail Mary to Tau Ceti. He was an academic to his core."

Theresa's voice softened as she asked, "And what about when it came to joining the mission? I know it came out that you…forced him to be on the ship but…how true is that?"

"Every word of it is true. He didn't want to go and I needed him to." Eva pressed her palms against the table and pushed her chair back, rising to her feet. "Thank you for coming, but I regret that I must ask you to go now."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. You must have grown close with him in your time together."

"Have a good rest of your day, Dr. Maguire." She took the few steps to the door and the guard fell in beside her as they left the room.

The door opens and Eva's eyebrows shoot up at the sight of the man sitting at the table. He is much older than when she saw him last, but he is still recognizable. The barest hint of a smile lifts her lips as she takes her seat. "Dimitri Komorov. It is a surprise to see you." She habitually uses Russian and she glances toward Lange in the corner before continuing in English. "Though…I can't say that I am disappointed."

Dimitri's grin has not changed, she sees, as it lights up his face. "Eva Stratt! It is good to see you too! How is prison life treating you?"

"I can't complain. Though it has gotten a bit cold." She momentarily holds the blanket out before wrapping it back around herself.

It takes a few seconds for him to burst into uproarious laughter. He waggles a finger at her. "You make joke. I did not know you could do that."

A small smile tightens her lips. "Wasn't much time for jokes while running the taskforce."

"Yes..yes, I suppose so."

"Speaking of…" Eva leans forward, careful to barricade her arms from the cool table with the blanket, "why are you here? We all parted ways years ago. Everyone involved has wiped their hands clear of me, certainly."

"Not everyone. I have always liked you, Stratt. Unfortunately necessary you take brunt of blame." Dimitri mirrors her position and there is a spark in his eye. "How long has been since Hail Mary launch?"

"Twenty-six years," she says without missing a beat.

He slaps the table with his hand and his grin is back. "Exactly. Twenty-six years. And what does that mean?"

"It was the expected time frame for the mission." The realization dawns on her immediately and it feels as though her breath is knocked out of her lungs. She near-silently breathes out: "The beetles?"

Dimitri nods. "The beetles."

"Where are they? Have they already returned? Were all four intact? What's on them?" The questions flow out of her before she can stop them.

He chuckles and leans back in his seat. "Slow, Stratt. No, they have not made it back yet. Not completely. Currently between Jupiter and Saturn orbit paths. We only just picked up their signal yesterday. Looks as though two have made way home."

"But is the data…"

"Data is good. Grace did good. He found solution."

Eva's heart skips a beat. It hadn't been for nothing. She did not send him to a pointless death. She's still breathless as she asks, "What did he find?"

For the first time, Dimitri avoids looking her in the eye. He rubs the back of his neck. "I am…not supposed to say. Still early in looking through data. But…we need the beetles back. That I can say."

She also leans back in her chair, pulling the blanket tight around her. Her mind reels. What had Grace found? (He did it.) Why is it necessary to have the beetles back on Earth if all the information is transmitted? (Grace did it.) How will they even retrieve the small crafts as they were never meant for reentry? (He'd saved Earth.) She shakes her head. "Dimitri…I need to know."

He gives her a sympathetic look. "I know, Stratt. But I do not have power to tell you. I barely could come and tell you this before public reveal. Wish it could be different."

She gives a small nod of her head. "I understand, as much as I hate it. I appreciate you thinking of me despite everything that has happened."

"Of course. You reason we got here in first place." Dimitri stands. She does the same. He holds out a hand and she takes it. "You ever get out of here, I buy you drink, yeah?"

"I'll hold you to it. Thank you, again."

He nods and Eva watches as he exits through the other door. She stares at it for a long time, clutching the blanket close. Finally, Lange give her a gentle nudge and she moves to return to her cell.

She stood outside and stared at the stretch of ocean surrounding them. A habit she had formed to help when her mind was overwhelmed. Ironically, it served as a grounding method. Everyone had learned to leave her alone when she did. Everyone except him.

"What's got your mind spinning now?" Grace asked as he took up his place standing beside her.

What doesn't? Eva folded her arms, eyes never leaving the waves. "The Sahara."

Grace hissed through his teeth which he did every time one of the ethical dilemmas got brought up. She'd bet that he wasn't even aware that he did it. "How's that going?"

"As well as you might expect with the bureaucracy and using my position to make sure it gets done."

"You really love to throw your weight around."

She didn't respond and he continued. "Still crazy to me that this is the length we have to go to just to save our sorry butts. I wonder if it could be dismantled after the sun is saved. You know…try and bring the ecosystem back to normal."

"You really think they'll be so willing to give up such a power source?" She shook her head. "We'd be extremely lucky if anything went back to normal after all this is over."

"Think we'll keep in touch?"

The question startled her and she turned to look at him. He was staring out at the water, hands tucked into his pockets, that now-familiar cardigan of his flapping in the wind. "What makes you ask that?"

He shrugged. "Well, if we go back to normal after, and at the very least the little things will, then that means I'll go back to teaching. Would someone like you want anything to do with an eighth grade science teacher?" He turned to look at her, grin on his face. His glasses hung stupidly off his ear and under his chin.

Eva turned her attention back to the ocean. "There's not much point thinking about that right now. Our focus needs to be on getting the Hail Mary ready."

"Right." There almost seemed to be a note of disappointment in his voice but then it disappeared. "I'll get back to my little farm then and you get back to yelling and keeping everything on track."

"I don't yell."

"And you still get results. I'm sure there's plenty who could learn from you."

"Shut up, Grace."

Eva paces the length of the cell, chewing on her lip. She thought she'd broken the habit years ago, but in this moment it returns as her mind churns. She has to get out of here. She has to see what is on the beetles. The science and math relating to the project had never been her forte, but she picked up just enough during it to know that the small crafts might take anywhere from a few hours to a few days to reach Earth. It would probably take a while longer to retrieve them. They hadn’t planned for that. But that's less of her concern; the information stored on the beetles is already being transmitted. The crew's notes, data, logs. That's what she is interested in seeing now.

Not long into her continued pacing, Lange returns yet again, this time with a tray of food. He sets it on the flat plane of metal that serves as the exchange spot so she can easily grab it. Instead she steps up by the bars and grabs them tight. In a low voice she states, "Lange I have to get out of here."

He frowns. "You know that is not happening. They want to keep you in here long as they can."

"An appeal of good behavior, best behavior. I've been the best prisoner you've seen in years. It's not a lie. We both know it. I need to see what they sent back. I need to see this end. Please." She has always hated begging.

Lange closes his eyes with a sigh and when he opens them again, his gaze is soft. "…I will see what I can do."

Eva sighs and presses her forehead against the bars, metal and cold both biting into her flesh. It's not much, but it's something. She hears Lange's sigh then his soft voice —"Eat. It will do you no good to starve yourself."—then his footsteps as he walks away. It takes her several long seconds before she straightens and grabs the tray. She carries it to her desk where she unceremoniously drops it. A bit of coffee splashes out of the cup. She glares at it before sighing and running her fingers through her hair. There has to be something else she can do. Perhaps reach out to some of the others that had been on the project, convince them to make appeals. Dimitri likely would. She knows a few others that would do the same. They'd been beside her throughout it all; it was not their fault that she had been the one to burden the legal repercussions after. It would take a few phone calls and would likely require her to pull a few strings to have more than one call a day, but she could do it. It's simply a matter of making a list.

She pulls out a notebook and pencil and sits at her desk. As she filters her memory for names, writing them down, she takes slow bites of her meal. It's bland, as is most food nowadays, but she's used to it. Point is it goes down like anything else and gives her energy. That's all she needs. When she finishes she stares down at the two pages of names. It's nearly illegible—she hadn't trained herself to be neat with her left hand, only to write—but as she is the only one to be reading it it's fine. She leans back in her chair. The cup of coffee shakes slightly in her hand as she brings it to her lips. Cold bitter caffeine hits her tongue. It's a welcome taste.

She prays to no one and everyone that this works.

Eva sat at her desk, papers littering its surface, tablet and computer both filled with more of the digital same. It was never ending. Her eyes darted across the screen in front of her and she could feel the strain behind them; she'd been at this for several hours. With a heaved sigh, she turned the tablet off and rubbed her eyebrows, careful not to rub her actual eyes. When she pulled them away her gaze found Grace sitting across from her, where he had been since about an hour ago. He sat crosslegged in the chair as it spun around, dutifully studying the laptop he precariously had balanced on his lap. Watching him worsened her headache.

Grace's chair slowly came to a stop and he straightened it to face her. He pulled his glasses of his face, occasionally glancing at her, before darting away again as he used his shirt to clean the lenses.

Eva sighed. "Spit it out, Grace, whatever it is."

He looked surprised. "Who says I have something to say?"

She leveled him with a look. "Because you clearly do. Now, what is it?"

Grace slid his glasses back onto his face then closed his laptop. "Do you believe in God?"

"Excuse me?"

"I know, I know, weird question. Steve Hatch asked me it when he came to get some Astrophage for the beetles." He drummed his fingers on the computer case. "I haven't been able to stop thinking about it."

"How come?" She asked. It was easier to focus on that than how hard her head was beginning to pound.

"I'm not entirely sure. I'm a man of science, Stratt, I haven't given much thought to God. At least not beyond a 'thank God' here and there and I'm not sure if that's considered a thought. Anyways, Hatch said he thought Astrophage was God giving us a gift. I told him it was God giving us an apocalypse. Guess that's why it won't leave my head. Figured I'd ask what you thought."

Eva hummed. "I'll believe in whatever I need to in order for this project to work."

Grace snorted. "Pretty sure that's how you get smited. Smote? Smit."

"As long as they can wait until after this is over and we're launched, then whatever powers be can smite me. Stick to science, Grace. It's better for you." She turned her tablet back on. "I have a headache."

"I'll get you some ibuprofen," Grace stated as he stood. He paused then leaned over and tapped on her screen a few times. It's hue shifted and he flashed his crooked smile. "Blue light filter. Should help a little bit." Then he turned and left.

"You understand?"

Eva looks up at Lange sitting across from her and nods. They'd been over the rules several times now. Lange seems more anxious about it than her. She returns her gaze out the window to the clouds streaming past the outside of the jet. The cuffs around her wrists are cold and impractical, she feels. Where could she run thousands of meters in the air? But it was one of the rules; she is to remained cuffed at all times.

It had taken a month for it to be decided that she could be allowed to see the end of the project. With their stipulations of course. She was to be guarded at all times. Under no circumstances could she be left alone. She's not to try and take charge of anything, only to observe. They tried to make it quite clear that all her power is gone. None of it matters. All she cares for is that she will get to see what was sent back. She'll get to see the solution.

It is a several hour flight to wherever they are going—she had not been told which irks her to some degree—and she watches as Lange and her other guard, Mulder, take turns having short quick naps. At some point, she leans her own head back and closes her eyes. She doesn't realize that she'd fallen asleep until she wakes to Lange gently shaking her shoulder and saying her name.

"We're here," he states and takes a small step away to give her room to stand.

Eva stands, rolling her neck and shoulders as she does. She glances out the window to try and glean some information about where they might be but all she sees is snow. She sighs through her nose. They leave the jet and immediately climb into a van. The windows are tinted so dark she can't even see out. It sends her back in time to similar vehicles and procedures. Her heart skips a beat as she begins to have a feeling about where they are.

It is another several hours of driving. No one talks, which Eva is thankful for. She stares at her reflection in the window for the entire way. When they finally arrive and the back door is opened, she steps out into the snow and lets out a silent sigh as the familiar sight of the launch facility of Baikonur, Kazakhstan. Her heart pounds in her chest. She hasn't been back here since the Hail Mary launched. There is a sudden need to wipe her hands on her pants. She ignores it.

They make their way into one of the buildings and everything comes rushing back to her. She has to keep herself from taking off, stalking through the halls as she once had, a woman on a mission. She fights the muscle memory and stays between Lange and Mulder. It doesn't take long to reach their destination, a room she's intimately familiar with. She'd used it to host meetings after all. Within, she finds it changed, full of computers and tables almost too many. One could barely maneuver themself through. But one body is and Eva smiles slightly at the sight of Dimitri.

He stops in front of them and puts his hands on his hips, grin ever-present on his face. "Stratt! I am glad to see that all that talk worked. You deserve to be here. Now I believe I promise you drink if you ever got out of that prison."

Mulder clears his throat. "She isn't supposed to—"

"Ah, what happen here stay here, no?" Dimitri raises an eyebrow. "No need to tell anyone 'bout one small drink."

Eva shakes her head. "Perhaps later, Dimitri. Right now could you just fill me in?"

He nods and a serious air comes over him. "Of course. Here, as you can see, we have computers for us to review data. Multiple of us can work simultaneously. Is good setup. We set up few lab in other rooms for the specimens sent back."

"Specimens?"

"I told you Grace found solution. Come, I take you to lab and we explain more there."

Dimitri leads them down the hall again and into another room full of equipment. There are a few others in here who glance up as they enter but quickly return to their work. Dimitri scans the room then waves as he spots who he was looking for. The woman walks over, hands tucked into the pockets of her lab coat. She smiles as she stops in front of them and goes, "Hi, I'm—"

"Dr. Theresa Maguire," Eva interrupts.

Maguire's eyebrows shoot up but then she chuckles. "I'm surprised you remember me, Miss Stratt."

"Of course. I didn't get many visitors." She doesn't mention the fact that she'd been shaken by one of Grace's students seeking her out. "How did you get here?"

"I volunteered." She shrugs. "The moment that I found out that the beetles had the solution on board and they were going to need help, I reached out. After all, I'm doing the same work Dr. Grace did and I like to think I do it pretty well." She glances over her shoulder at the lab with a sad smile. "He did an amazing job. He really did most of the work for us."

Eva skims the room before focusing back on her. "What exactly did he do?"

Now Maguire gets excited. "Taumoeba."

"What's that?"

"It's what he found. It is Astrophage's only known predator. It's how we save our sun." She guides them further into the room to a container housing another smaller container. "This was retrieved from Ringo. It's Dr. Grace's farm for breeding the Taumoeba, for getting them here. One of them anyway. Another group of scientists has the farm from Paul. It's in our best interest to breed as many as we can before sending them off to Venus where they will then help control the Astrophage population. With enough time, our sun will return back to normal."

Eva stares at the container. It seems so small to house the solution. She starts to bite her lip but quickly stops herself. Her attention turns back to Dimitri and Maguire. "You keep only using 'him'. It's always 'him', just Grace. You never use 'they'. They're a crew—Yáo, Ilyukhina, Grace. Why is it only 'him'?"

Dimitri and Maguire share a look and then he clears his throat. "We let you continue, Dr. Maguire. Stratt, come with me. There is…more to explain."

Once again they find themselves out in the hall and he guides them to yet another door and stops. Dimitri rubs his hand over his mouth and avoids looking at Stratt. Eva's beginning to grow impatient when he finally speaks and his voice is the lowest and heaviest she has ever heard it. There's a slight waver as he tells her, "Grace was…only one to come out of coma. Yáo and Ilyukhina were dead when he woke up. He was alone."

It feels as though the air has been sucked out of her lungs. That possibility had been known but hadn't been considered high. The coma gene was to allow them to wake up with limited to no negative side effects. The armature was programmed to take care of them while they were in the comas. Something had to have gone seriously wrong with Yáo and Ilyukhina that it could not have helped them. Her knees feel weak and it takes all her willpower not to collapse. She pulls in a deep breath. "He did all of this alone?"

Here Dimitri lets out a small huff of air that almost could be a laugh. "No. That is where it gets complicated. It would be best if you watched his logs. Hard to explain by my self." He gestures at the door. "There is computer in there with data. No one else will bother you. Take all time you need."

He starts to step away then pauses and lightly places one hand on her shoulder before walking off. Eva focuses on her breathing. Once that is fully back under her control, she looks at Lange. "Can I be alone for this?"

Mulder opens his mouth but Lange interrupts, "You know you're not supposed to be out of our sight."

"Lange…please?"

He sighs and looks at Mulder. "We'll check for any other exits. Long as that's clear, I believe it's perfectly reasonable she have this, don't you agree, Lee?"

Mulder looks away and nods. The three of them enter the room and Eva stands by the door as the two of them search. There's no other door and the only windows are too thin for her to slip out of. Satisfied, Mulder steps out and stands next to the door. Lange stops in front of her and she raises an eyebrow. He whispers, "I imagine you'd rather your hands be free for this too, right?"

She swallows then nods. He unlocks the cuffs and hooks them to his belt. He licks his lips and states, "I'm trusting you here, Stratt."

"I know…" Eva watches as he walks out and closes the door behind him. She closes her eyes and sucks in a deep breath before sitting down in the chair in front of the computer. Her fingers hover over the keys and she stares, marveling at how they shake. Has she ever shook like this before? She sets them down to still them. And yet she doesn't wake the screen up. Something holds her back. A few keystrokes are all that separate her from some of his last words. His last messages to Earth. Her heart pounds in her chest. She squeezes her eyes shut again. Her muscle memory takes over; her fingers fly over the keys. The computer chimes and she blinks in surprise. That had been her credentials during the project. They shouldn't have worked. And yet.

It's easy to find the recordings. Everything is neatly organized. A part of her is tempted to look at everything else first, but she knows it's just avoidance. One hard swallow. She clicks.

"So the video logs will help keep you sane, in a way, as well as giving us insight into everything you do. You're encouraged to record anything you think might be pertinent or even just what might be on your mind. Again, they're supposed to help keep you from going crazy." Grace sat with Yáo, Ilyukhina, and Dubois in the break room of the People's Liberation Army Navy Gansu. She knew that no one except the Chinese military and herself still called it that. Everyone else loved to call it "Stratt's Vat". She didn't acknowledge when they did.

Eva sat in the corner of the room, away from the others, watching as Grace talked with the crew. She had plenty of other work to do. The launch drew closer every day. They'd be leaving the ship soon to begin the end stretch of preparations. There was no real reason for her to be here and yet she remained. She always enjoyed watching Grace interact with the crew. They relaxed around him in a way they never did when she was around.

"Is it meant to help with any inter-crew issues as well?" Dubois asked.

"Well..uh…well, yes. It can. I mean…" Grace rubbed the back of his neck. "I imagine it would do well to talk to a camera about frustrations that might come up rather than fighting, but that's not really my…area….."

Ilyukhina snorted and lightly hit Dubois' shoulder. "We will have no issues. We have bonded well. We will not fight."

"We have no guarantee of that," Yáo chimed in, "as we will have many years with no one besides one another. I am sure we will have our disagreements. The logs will serve us well."

"Right! Like I said, that's kinda their whole point. They'll be quite easy to use…very similar to filming a home video. Er…I guess more accurately a..vlog. Or maybe like a conference call on a computer…."

As Grace stumbled over his examples, Eva continued to watch. He interacted with the crew so easily despite his occasional awkwardness. He was practically a member himself by now. A crewmate in every way except literal. A frown pulled at her lips but she quickly stopped it. Worse case scenarios would do her no good to dwell on. Contingency plans were best left to 'just in case'. She sucked in a deep breath.

"Who all will have access to these logs?" Dubois asked. "I imagine anyone on the project?"

"I…" Grace blinked then glanced at Eva. "I don't actually know."

The astronauts followed his gaze and she suddenly had four pairs of eyes staring at her expectantly. She sighed. "Those retrieving the data from the beetles will see them as will your home agencies. I am sure that CNSA, ROSCOSMOS, and NASA will all be quite eager to see how you all fare. There is a naming procedure embedded into the system so should you want to record anything for anyone specific, you could indicate it and your request will most likely be followed with minimal outside viewing. Confidentiality, you understand. Even light years away, you'll have to abide by such stipulations so it might be best to keep that in mind when recording."

A tense silence filled the room as the crew of the Hail Mary continued to stare at her. She stared right back. They seemed like they were waiting for more. The silence was finally broken by Grace clapping his hands together and exclaiming, "Right! Well that answers that question." He went on to keep talking but by that point, Eva had stood up and left the room.

It takes several hours for Eva to watch all the logs. It doesn't help that in the beginning she repeatedly pauses them and simply stares at the image of Grace on the screen. He looks so sad and confused; the drugs had done their job. Grace doesn't hesitate with the logs once he discovers he can make them. He documents his every thought. It's as though he'd rather talk out loud to the camera than to be alone in silence. She can't imagine what it was like. At least in her prison isolation she still had the guards.

And then there was Rocky. Grace's logs become shorter at this point, but more numerous as he first begins interacting with the alien. They grow longer again once Rocky has taken up his place on the ship. Eva almost can't believe that it is Grace of all people who would be the first to meet another sentient species and yet she finds she's not surprised in the slightest. And once Rocky is there she can see the change in Grace. He smiles and laughs and excitedly rambles about science. It's the man she knew again. She's shocked to find tears tracing down her cheeks. She doesn't wipe them away.

"I can’t do both. I can go home or I can save Rocky. I’ve sent you detailed logs of all of our findings. And enough Taumoeba for you to start your very own Taumoeba farm. At least I never have to hear you say, 'I told you so.' Even though you were right." The Grace in the video shakes his head, tears in his eyes, and then the screen returns to the list of logs.

Eva is about to turn the computer off when she notices one last entry. She swallows hard. It's labeled: "For Eva Stratt". She bites her lip and selects it.

Grace once again appears on the screen but he's refusing to look at the camera. His head bobs and he presses his lips together hard enough to turn them white. He rubs his hand over his mouth then heaves out a sigh. It takes her too long to recognize that he is angry. Finally he looks directly into the camera and begins to talk.

"I..know there are going to be other people watching this beside you, but I don't care. Every word here is for you. I..do not…forgive you, Stratt. I can't. I have tried. Repeatedly. But I just..can't do it. I understand why you did what you did. I do. But it doesn't erase my anger. You sent me on a suicide mission. You manipulated my memory so I wouldn't even know that you had done that until I was too invested!! And the worst part is….I hate how right you were. Cause you were right to send me.

"As horrible and awful as it has been…I've been having possibly the best few months of my life working on this, weird as that sounds, knowing that what I'm doing will help you all back home. I always believed in the Hail Mary. I just never thought that I would be one of the three who..." He trailed off, and Eva couldn't help but think of Yáo and Ilyukhina, already dead and decomposing when Grace awakened. "You made the decision for me. I don't forgive you. But I do thank you.

"You told me that part of why I was so perfect for this was because I had nobody. That I didn't even have a dog. You were right. I left no one behind. There was no one to miss me. And yet in this small point in the universe I have found my best friend. And I'm going to go save him. I was going to tell you all of this in person once I got back to Earth. I had this whole speech planned out when I saw you again. Scream and yell in your face so you'd know just how mad I was. But that's not going to happen anymore. You all will get the beetles back. Rocky and Erid won't make it unless I help.

"You saw something in me, Stratt, that I didn't see in myself back then. I see it now. I hope you live your life well. However that may be. Goodbye, Eva."

Eva buries her face in her hands as a singular sob breaks out from her throat despite her attempts to bite it back. It takes her too long to regain control of her breathing. Even then before she knows it and can stop it, more sobs are racking her body. She can't even remember the last time she cried, let alone this hard. There is every possibility that Lange and Mulder can hear her from outside but she can't make it stop. She hugs her arms tight around herself as she sucks in deep breaths. In a brief break she stutters out on a whisper, "I'm…I'm sorry..Ryland…."

After far too long, she regains control. She starts the log again and pauses it, staring at Grace on the screen through tears still lingering in her eyes. She gnaws on her lip. "You were wrong, Grace. You did leave people behind. There are people that miss you. Your students that you claimed were your reason for staying. They worked together to build a monument to you on campus. Several were inspired to go into science. Theresa Maguire is here now and working on the Taumoeba, helping to finish what you started. The crew…the staff….Dimitri..Carl….they miss you. You were popular without even realizing it. Just by being yourself…And me. I didn't realize it, fully, until just now, but I miss you. And I'm sorry for what I did but I had humanity to think of. I had to save everyone. I had to save them and it meant I couldn't save you too. I don't deserve your forgiveness. But I wish you could know just how loved you are."

It takes her another ten minutes to compose herself. All evidence is cleared from her face. She stands and stares down at the image of Grace for a few seconds longer before turning the computer off. One deep breath and then she steps to the door and opens it. "I'm finished…," she murmurs.

Mulder avoids looking at her. Lange nods and pulls the cuffs from his belt. Eva holds her wrists out and he slowly puts them back on. In a low whisper barely loud enough for her to hear he asks, "Are you okay?"

She nods mutely. Lange studies her for a few seconds more before giving a short nod. "Dimitri came to ask that we join him for food once you were finished. If you are feeling up to it."

Eva nods again. "I am. Food will help I'm sure."

Lange hums and they begin to walk down the hall. They have to go to a different building for the mess hall. The cold air is welcome on her face and she momentarily closes her eyes. Then they're back in the warmth of indoor heating. When they enter the room Dimitri is already there with a half-eaten plate in front of him. Another plate has been filled and sits across from him. He waves them over then gestures at the food. "For you, Stratt. Apologies to your guards but I was not sure what they would like."

She slowly sits down. "Thank you, Dimitri."

Lange looks at Mulder. "Go get yourself something to eat. We'll be fine."

Mulder nods and walks off. Lange remains standing behind her. Dimitri watches her for a few seconds before stating, "You saw his message for you."

"I did," she swallows.

He hums and closes his eyes. Then he forces himself to sound jovial. "What about that Rocky, hm? Amazing that Grace found."

"They found each other." She lifts her fork and pushes a few peas around on her plate. Out of the corner of her eye she watches Lange then she turns her attention back to Dimitri. She switches to Russian. "I have to get away."

Dimitri raises an eyebrow and responds in kind. "Away from here?"

"Yes." She glances at Lange again, who has kindly avoided his gaze. "I can't go back to the prison. We have a chance to live again. My life is in front of me. I would like to experience it."

He leans back in his chair, grin slowly stretching across his face. "I am sure we can come up with a plan. Though I'm sure you're already beginning to think one up, knowing you."

Lange lets out a short cough. Eva looks up to find Mulder almost back. She gives a small nod to Dimitri right as her other guard reaches the table. Dimitri laughs and lifts a bottle of vodka from the chair beside him. "I believe I owe you drink, Stratt. No time like now."

Eva smiles as he begins to pour. Mulder says nothing.

The sun burns brightly, nearly overbearing, and yet she cannot find it in herself to hate it. The summer day is beautiful and she watches as butterflies dance around the flowers along the stone wall surrounding the property. Vaughn really enjoys her gardening and landscaping. She'd never imagined herself living a cottage lifestyle and yet here she is.

"Eva," a low voice growls in her ear as arms wrap around her waist. "What are you doing out here?"

She leans back against her wife's chest with a hum. "Basking in the sunlight, Vaughn, you know that."

"Of course, how could I forget. You and your sunlight." Vaughn kisses her temple and laughs against her skin as she goes, "It's not going anywhere."

Eva turns and levels a look at her. "That is not funny."

"It's a little funny, meine Liebe. Come now…it's been nearly ten years since your scientists fixed the sun. And nothing else has happened. We're okay."

"First off, they were not my scientists. Not at that point." She sighs and takes a few steps away to the wall. She presses her hand against the top stone, relishing the heat that seeps from it into her skin. "And…I know. It just feels..wrong not to appreciate it every second I can."

Vaughn follows after her. She leans back against the wall, pulling grey hair out of her face and into a ponytail. She has a smirk on her face as she goes, "You won't be saying that once we're in the peak of summer and you're begging me to fan you, to open all the windows, to figure some way to keep you cool."

"You're impossible."

"I am. And you love me. Now, want to join me going into town? You can keep basking in the sun there, I promise. Market should be set up today."

Eva looks around again, marveling at how bright everything is, before turning her face up into the rays. Silently, she sends a 'thank you' out, just as she does nearly every day now. She waits a few seconds then looks at Vaughn with a small smile. "Let's go."