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It's the night before the final trial. They've made it this far, completed six out of the seven trials necessary to find the Eternal Library, and they're in Corona and they're so close to the finish line, and they've almost made it.
Almost.
Victory is tantalizingly close. So much so that they can taste it. So much so that there's a kind of anticipation within the group, the kind that can almost be felt like a physical thing. Everyone is some sort of mix of anticipation and nervousness.
Everyone except for Hugo, that is.
Hugo hasn't said a word to anybody since they left Ingvarr, and Varian can't for the life of him figure out why. He wants to blame it on the fact that they had just left the very kingdom Hugo despised his entire life, that maybe he needs time to get over whatever feelings that evoked, but he can't help but feel like that's not quite it. There's more, something else that he can't figure out.
Whatever it is, Hugo seems insistent on keeping it to himself. He shuts everyone out when they try to breach the topic to him— even Varian, which hurts more than he'd like to admit, because he thought they were closer than that. He thought—
Well, it doesn't matter what he thought. What he hoped. Whatever he thought their relationship could've been morphing into is clearly not what they really are, and he'd been delusional to hope for anything more. Hugo has made it clear that he doesn't want to talk to anyone, and that includes Varian. He isn't special. He doesn't know why he ever thought his silly infatuation could possibly be requited.
Anyway.
Rapunzel had insisted on a small celebration in honor of Varian's return home, so the entire day had been spent traipsing around Corona like tourists (well, his friends are technically considered tourists) and having fun. Pretending to have fun, in Hugo's case.
And Varian tried, okay? He tried to talk to Hugo every time they got a moment alone, but the moment he tried to have a real conversation, the blond just brushed him off and changed the subject. It's ridiculous, and it's infuriating. By the end of the day, Varian decided he was sick of it.
Which is why he's here in the throne room, pretending to enjoy a chat with Eugene about meeting Adira and Hector, when in reality, all he wants to do is find Hugo. He doesn't really have a plan for after that, hasn't decided whether he wants to punch or kiss the thief, but he'll figure that out later. Probably.
Eugene asks a question about his father and Nuru eagerly jumps in. Yong is preoccupied with Lance and the girls, and Hugo…
Hugo is nowhere to be found.
Varian gnaws on the inside of his cheek, hating how concerned he is over not being able to find someone who clearly doesn't want to be found. Everything in him itches to leave, to sprint through those doors and tear Corona apart until he finds Hugo.
"Var?"
Varian blinks and turns to find Rapunzel looking at him expectantly.
"Sorry, what?" He glances towards the doors again. Maybe he can just slip out real quick, pretend he needs the bathroom…
Rapunzel follows his gaze. "Is everything alright? You've been acting weird all night."
"Weird? I am not acting weird, I don't know what you—" a knowing look has him shutting up and groaning. "Yeah, okay. I've been acting weird."
She looks at the doors again. "Is this about your friend? Hugo?"
Blood rushes to Varian's cheeks. He thinks fleetingly about lying to her, but she'd know. It isn't worth the trouble. "I— yeah. Yeah, it is." He rubs the back of his neck. "I'm just worried about him, is all."
"He seems very aloof," she says with a nod. "Is he usually like that, or is something going on?"
Varian shrugs. "It's hard to tell with him. He's been like this for weeks. Ever since we left Ingvarr, he's been so much more distant than usual, and I— I don't know. I don't know how to fix it."
"Have you tried talking to him?" She asks gently.
Varian laughs, but there's no humor behind it. "Of course I have. Countless times. I've tried giving him space, and that hasn't worked either. Something must've happened, I just don't know what, and I want to fix it because I hate seeing him like this but I don't know how to fix it because he's being stupid and stubborn and so Hugo and—"
A gentle hand on his shoulder interrupts his thoughts. "I understand. I know how frustrating it can be, trying to get someone to open up who's insistent on shutting everybody else out."
Varian sighs, leaning forward to rest his head on her shoulder. "I don't know what to do. It really, really bothers me that he won't talk to me about what's going on."
"Does he usually?"
He nods. "He didn't used to, but… he's changed. A lot. He used to tell me things that he wouldn't tell anyone else, and it made me feel like— well, it made me think—" another sigh. "I don't know."
There's a small pause from Rapunzel. Then, "you care about him."
Not a question. A statement.
You care about him.
Varian sucks in a breath. "Yeah. I kinda— I really do. I really care about him."
And it's terrifying, of course, because he's never felt this strongly about anyone before. He's had crushes and gotten obsessed with fictional characters, sure. But this, this feeling like Varian's body is on fire whenever Hugo so much as looks at him? That's new. It's new, and it's so, so intense, and it's strange, but it isn't bad. It's the kind of feeling that makes him understand that look in Eugene's eyes whenever he gets Rapunzel to smile. The kind of feeling that makes him believe that even though he isn't a poet, he could write sonnets that would put the most eloquent of writers to shame.
He knows what this feeling is. He knows he's in love with Hugo, and that he has been for longer than he'd care to admit. He's hopelessly head over heels for him, has fallen for him in a way that somehow simultaneously feels like he's tripped over his own feet and violently smacked his nose on the pavement and like he could fly forever and never have his feet touch the ground.
He's in love with Hugo, and he can't even get the blond to have a real conversation with him.
Life is cruel to him, specifically.
Rapunzel gently pushes him back so she can look him in the eyes. "Tell him that."
"What?!" Is she crazy?
"Tell him you care for him. Maybe it'll change things."
It will change things, and not in the way that Rapunzel is hoping. "I can't just— I can't just tell him."
She shrugs. "Why not?"
"Because— because—" Varian scrambles for a reason, any reason, to justify his cowardice. "Because what am I supposed to say?! 'Hi, Hugo! I know you've been acting like you don't want anything to do with me lately but I just wanted you to know that I'm madly in love with you, and I think I have been for a long time. I know you don't love me back and will probably never want to speak to me again, but that's fine! See you in the morning for the last trial!'"
Rapunzel rolls her eyes. "Have you stopped for a moment to consider that maybe Hugo is acting like this because your feelings are, in fact, requited?"
He crosses his arms. "I'm sorry, what?"
"I don't know much about Hugo, so I could be wrong."
"You probably are."
"Am I, though? Varian, maybe the reason he's shutting everybody out is because your journey is coming to an end. Maybe he's afraid of what that means next. Maybe he's afraid of loving you because he doesn't know you love him too, and so he's closing off his heart before it has the chance to get broken."
Varian pauses. He…
Well, okay. He hadn't thought of that.
"You really think Hugo— you think I have a chance?" He asks, voice small.
Rapunzel offers a gentle smile. "I think that if you want him to be vulnerable with you, you might have to take the first step and be vulnerable first."
On paper, it seems like a horrendous idea. There's so much that could go wrong with this, so much about their relationship that could change for the worse. It's a huge risk, one that he's not sure he should even take.
But Rapunzel makes it seem like maybe it's a risk worth taking. That the unthinkable could happen, that Hugo could love him back.
The idea of it thrills him. Could it be true? Does Hugo feel that same fire in his body, that same pressing need to be around him every moment of the day? Does Hugo imagine a future with him the way Varian does? A future here, in Corona— or wherever Hugo wants to go— together?
Maybe… maybe Rapunzel is right. Maybe Hugo is scared. Maybe Varian just has to step up and be the bold one for once.
He swallows past the fear and nods to himself.
Okay.
Okay.
He's going to go find Hugo.
He pulls Rapunzel in for a quick hug, murmuring thank you. She squeezes just a little tighter.
"Go chase your dream," she whispers.
And he does.
He slips out of the throne room as silently as possible, praying his absence goes unnoticed by his friends. Rapunzel will surely be able to cover for him.
Alright, he thinks. Hugo. Focus on Hugo.
It's not difficult to find him once Varian actually starts to search. He looks in a couple of broom closets, in the library, in the hidden hallways typically meant for servants, and it isn't until he passes a large window overlooking the courtyard that he catches a glimpse of familiar blond hair.
He looks closer, face practically smashed against the glass, and—
Yes! Standing at the top of the palace steps, leaning over a banister, is Hugo.
Varian has never run through the palace faster in his life.
He arrives at the doors that lead outside, breathless and flushed from sprinting, but he does his best to breathe and tidy himself up before gently pushing the doors open and stepping outside.
The cool night air greets him immediately, a light breeze brushing tendrils of raven hair against his cheeks. It's a beautiful night— the moon is bright, the summer insects are singing, and the hedge maze not too far away emits a faint scent of wildflowers carried forth by the breeze— but Varian couldn't care less. His attention is stuck on Hugo, who still hasn't seemed to realize that Varian is outside.
He watches the blond sigh. Watches him drum his fingers along the banister. Watches him tighten his ponytail. These are all things that, over the course of the past two years, Varian has come to recognize as Hugo's nervous ticks.
Varian's got a few of those, himself. He tugs at his gloves, adjusts the goggles on his head, then clears his throat as softly as possible with the hope of not startling Hugo. "Hugh?"
Hugo's head whips around so fast, Varian swears he hears something crack. "What are you doing out here? I thought you were catching up with your friends."
"I— I was," Varian responds. "Am. I am. You're my friend, too. I noticed you left, I just… didn't want you to be alone."
Hugo closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. "Thanks, but your company isn't exactly necessary. I'm just fine out here."
Varian frowns at the coldness. "Okay…" he says slowly. He dares to take a step forward, halting when he notices how Hugo tenses. "I just— you've been acting off lately, and I—"
"How many times are you going to bring this up, Goggles?" Hugo pinches the bridge of his nose. "I'm fine, okay? I don't need your pity."
"I'm not pitying you—"
"You are," Hugo snaps. "And I don't need it. So why don't you just go back inside, and leave me alone?"
There's a sharp pang of… something in Varian's chest. "Did I do something? Is that why you've been so moody since Ingvarr?"
"Not everything is about you," Hugo mutters.
"Okay, then tell me what this is about!" Varian throws his hands up, exasperated. "I can't help if I don't know what's going on!"
"I never asked you to help me!"
"Hate to break it to you, but that's what friends do, Hugo! When someone isn't happy—"
"I'm perfectly content!"
Varian scoffs. What a laughable lie. "Oh, really?"
"Really," Hugo hisses. "What isn't there to be happy about? We're out of Ingvarr. We're almost done with this quest. Tomorrow, we'll be at the last trial, and— and—"
"And what?" Varian prompts when Hugo fails.
"And this will finally be over." He runs his hand through his hair, slumping against the banister like he's been defeated. "And I will be— I will be perfectly happy."
But Hugo's tone doesn't match his words, and so Varian can't help but think back on his conversation with Rapunzel and wonder.
"Will you be?" He whispers. "Happy?"
Hugo's gaze doesn't waver. He looks afraid. "Why wouldn't I be? Tomorrow will be the end of everything. Yong won't be a joke to his family anymore. Nuru will be able to save her kingdom. You'll have finished your mother's journey, and I—" he draws a shaky breath. "I'll finally be free."
"Free of what?"
Hugo squeezes his eyes shut again, like the question physically hurt him. "Just— nothing. Nothing."
Varian frowns. "It doesn't sound like nothing—"
"Well it is," Hugo snaps. When he opens his eyes again, they shine with something Varian can't name, something on the tip of his tongue that he can't quite recall. "Go inside, Varian."
Is— is he serious right now?
"No," he says defiantly.
Hugo scowls. "I want to be alone."
"No," Varian repeats, firmer this time. "I'm not just going to leave you out here so you can be all… mopey."
"I'm not being mopey!"
"You are!"
"Fine, then!" Hugo pushes off the banister, hurrying towards the stairs. "Then I'm not staying."
"Wha— Hugo!" No response. "Hugo!"
There's no way the thief doesn't hear him, but that doesn't stop him from dashing down the stairs and towards the hedge maze.
Varian groans, and after a small moment of deliberation, he follows suit.
It isn't difficult for him to catch up once he's actually inside the maze. Hugo must've started walking the moment he entered, because he's far, but within an easily reachable distance.
"Hugo!" He pleads. "Come back inside, stop— stop walking away from me!"
"Stop following me!" Hugo calls over his shoulder, not pausing his angry speed-walking.
"Hugo, I just—" Hugo makes a turn and Varian follows and then his hand is shooting out to wrap around Hugo's wrist. "Hugo!"
Finally, Hugo spins to face him, and then they're standing close, so close that they're nearly nose to nose.
Hugo's eyes narrow, his breathing heavy. "Leave me alone."
"I already told you, that's not going to work. Not with me."
Hugo tears his wrist from Varian's grip, backing a few steps away. "Why can't you just leave me be?! Why can't you just— just mind your own business and go back inside and enjoy a celebratory night with your friends—"
"This is what you call a celebratory night?!" Varian exclaims. "You avoiding me? Me having to track you down just to get you to talk to me, the two of us arguing?"
"That's not what I—"
"I don't care about the celebration, Hugo!" Varian grips his hair tightly, feeling as if he's going insane. "Maker, I have spent the past few weeks wanting to be alone with you, wanting to talk to you, wanting to know—" he cuts himself off. "I understand that you don't want to talk to me, that you would prefer to stay out here, alone and not say a word to me or the rest of the team—"
"I'm not—"
"But I'm not someone who's just going to let that happen," Varian finishes. "I'm not someone who's can just—"
"That's not what I want."
Varian pauses. "What?"
"That's—" Hugo's mouth opens and closes a few times. "That's not what I'd prefer at all."
Varian frowns, puzzled. His hands lower from his hair. "You've been avoiding me since Ingvarr."
Hugo flinches, a minute thing, but one that Varian is able to pick up on nevertheless. "Yes."
"We've hardly had a real conversation."
Hugo reaches out like he wants to grab Varian's hand, but he lowers it just as quickly. "In order to keep myself from saying the wrong things."
"You—" Varian swallows. "You've barely been able to look me in the eye."
Hugo glances at the ground guiltily. "I know." Varian watches him pick at a loose thread in his shirt, watches him tighten his ponytail. "I've spent these past weeks in agony. Wanting to be alone with you. Wanting to talk to you, but not being able to, because…" he trails off.
"Because of what?" Varian prompts.
Hugo firmly shakes his head. "I'm sorry."
He's sorry. How nice of him.
Bitterness creeps into Varian's head. It was a mistake to come out here.
"Fine, then." His words make Hugo look up at him. "I'll leave you alone."
He turns, and he hasn't even had the opportunity to take a step before Hugo is speaking.
"Varian."
Maker, he'll never get over the way Hugo says his name. He turns slowly, and cautious blue eyes meet terrified green.
"I haven't been able to stop thinking of you," he continues, fists clenching and unclenching. "From the mornings you ease, to the evenings you quiet, to the— the dreams you inhabit, my thoughts of you never end. I—" his voice trembles. "It's terrifying, but it's true. I'm yours, Varian. I've always been yours."
What.
What is he even saying right now? There's no possible way Hugo could mean what Varian hopes he does.
Right?
"What are you saying?" His tongue feels heavy in his mouth, which feels much too dry for comfort.
Hugo's expression turns quickly from one of trepidation to one of frustration. "Maker— I don't know how to be any clearer! You want honesty, so I give you honesty, and you don't even—"
Varian huffs. "Well, don't get angry with me!"
"I'm not angry!" Hugo says in a voice that definitely sounds angry. The pale skin beneath his freckles has become a ruddy red, and it would be a funny sight if they weren't currently in the middle of an argument.
"Right, you're oh so calm right now," Varian snaps. "You look angry, and bothered. Look at you, you're downright flushed!"
"Yeah, well, that's what happens when—"
"When one is angry!"
"When one burns for someone who doesn't feel the same way!"
Varian freezes. Hugo's confession hangs in the air between them, enveloping them in a silence only broken by Hugo's ragged breaths.
Oh, he thinks. Oh, Rapunzel was right.
"You—" it takes a moment for him to find his voice. "You… burn for me."
Not a question, not a search for confirmation from Hugo. Something else, confirmation to himself maybe, that he heard Hugo correctly. That this isn't some sort of dream.
"Why do you think I came in here?" Hugo whispers.
Varian could laugh. "Why do you think I followed you in here?"
That grabs Hugo's attention, making him go still.
Varian presses on. "If you would have only looked at me these past few weeks for longer than two seconds, you would've seen. It is you, Hugo, who I cannot sacrifice, I— I burn for—"
You, he means to say, but he's cut off by Hugo— or more accurately his lips, pressing firmly against Varian's own.
The kiss sets off sparks in Varian's stomach. Hugo's lips are warm and oh so soft and he just wants to press in, take more—
And then Hugo is pulling back, and looking at him with those big, stupid green eyes, and Varian is cupping his neck and yanking him back down into another, more searing kiss.
Those sparks in Varian's stomach quickly become a greedy flame whose oxygen is the way Hugo's fingers twist in Varian's hair and the warmth of his body pressed up against Varian's and the delicious noise he makes when Varian is brave enough to introduce a bit of tongue.
Kissing Hugo is… there's no comparison. No way to describe the heavenly way their bodies slot together, the sinful way Varian moans his name when they break apart and Hugo starts trailing kisses down his neck. One of Varian's hands snakes around Hugo's waist, creeping under his shirt, and he delights in the other boy's shiver when gloved fingers make contact with the smooth skin.
His entire body is on fire right now, and it's all Hugo's fault because somehow some way, he'd somehow fallen for the cocky thief he used to swear he hated, and now that he knows how it feels to be like this with him, Varian doesn't ever want to stop. If he could freeze time in this moment, he would, just so he would never have to stop kissing Hugo.
He knows they'll have to go back inside at some point, because people are bound to notice their absence and Rapunzel can only cover for so long. And if anyone came looking and found the two of them like this, Varian would probably be mortified.
Plus, they have a lot of talking to do. Like, a lot.
But there's always tomorrow, and after they've successfully found the library, they can talk— really talk— about the two of them, and maybe, just maybe, Hugo will decide to stay with him.
For now though, he's more than content to allow Hugo to press him against one of the hedges and kiss him with enough heat to melt his brain into a puddle. He's waited so long for something like this, and he isn't about to throw it away.
Tomorrow, he decides as Hugo whispers his name in a way that sends shivers down Varian's spine. After the trial, after we find the last totem and the library, we'll figure things out.
Yeah. That sounds like a solid plan.