Work Text:
minho
@justacat
people messaging me on depop are always on some shit. like genuinely i think i could care less how my old clothes fit you. the weather is nice outside, why don't you see if someone outside wants a part of your whore convention? i know i don't.
01:58 • 20 June 26 • 9,218 views
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81 retweet 8 quote tweet 587 likes
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See, Minho likes to joke around. Minho likes to say that things happen more often than they actually do. He has quite a few followers on twitter, and he likes to use it to his advantage to post bullshit he thinks of. It's really not that serious, but it does bring him joy.
With this joy, though, sometimes he gets exactly what he was ranting about in his tweets happening to him. One rare event will suddenly start to happen much more after he talks about it and says how much it annoys him.
Hyunjin tells him he should just stop being irritating online and he won't get people being irritating to him. Hyunjin doesn't know bearly as much as he likes to say he does. It is a bit annoying, but whatever. It's Hyunjin. Being annoying is in his blood.
However, this is new. And he can't say he's amused by it.
June 27th 2026
*picture attached*
You should have said that they were an extra large instead of a large. They're quite big.
15:47
Minho... Minho usually does hate it when people send him pictures of how the clothes he sells fit them. They're his old clothes he wore for years, he knows what they look like on a body. He's not stupid.
Usually, he'll leave a snotty reply telling them it's not his fault that they're stupid. It isn't his fault that they're stupid, and he never gets a message back most of the time. Sometimes he does, and he just blocks them so they can't buy from him again.
This time, though...
Those muscles. Mmmm... Minho would like a bite of them. He wants to chew on this guys bicep like it's a piece of chewing gum. Does that make him insane?
Maybe Hyunjin was right when he said Minho needed to be admitted into a psych ward.
Who is he kidding? Hyunjin is literally never right.
June 27th 2026
you have a pretty big bicep there.
4:04 PM
The response is instant.
Thank you? I meant what I said, though.
4:04 PM
you can mean what you said all you want. it's marked as a large because the tag says it's a large.
i do want to take a bite out of you though.
4:05 PM
That's a tad bit weird to say, don't you think?
4:06 PM
quick ask me how much i care.
4:06 PM
Feisty. You're a brat.
4:06 PM
my name is minho :)
do you like the tightness of the shirt?
4:07 PM
Hello, Minho. Did you know you're kind of a pain in the ass?
4:09 PM
so i've been told!
4:10 PM
At least you're self aware, sweetheart.
4:10 PM
did you like how the shirt felt, though?
4:11 PM
A little, yes.
4:13 PM
:)
4:13 PM
I feel like you size your things a size down.
4:14 PM
no! i don't like people who do that. i feel betrayed you would ever think something like that of me.
4:16 PM
You're dramatic, Minho.
4:17 PM
always using my name but won't give me yours. :(
it's like you don't want to be my friend.
4:18 PM
Chris works.
4:20 PM
Minho isn't good at this kind of thing. He loves to flirt with people until he gets what he wants, but in this scenario, he doesn't even know what he could get! He doesn’t know anything other than the fact this shirt doesn’t fit this guy, and that his name is Chris.
But he’s got big biceps and arms, and Minho is so bored of being lonely. All he has is Hyunjin, and Hyunjin is a menace to society. Hyunjin should be dealt with by making him stand in front of a wall without clothes on and getting eggs thrown at him.
Minho would do it if it didn’t mean getting charged for public indecency. Sad times, really.
He goes to Twitter instead though. Everything he needs advice for, he will always rely on Twitter first instead of google. Hyunjin says he shouldn’t let everyone and their mothers know all of his personal business, but Minho doesn’t care.
And Hyunjin is a loser.
minho
@justacat
what do you do when someone hot texts you on depop and by hot i mean he has a lot of muscle and he's flirting with me. i want him.
16:22 • 27 June 26 • 5,613 views
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34 retweet 2 quote tweet 477 likes
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╰┈➤ hyunjinnie
@hyvnjnn
why do you never tell me anythinnnngggg
16:22 • 27 June 26 • 192 views
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0 retweet 0 quote tweet 4 likes
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╰┈➤ minho
@justacat
of course your ass is here. always at the damn scene of the crime.
16:23 • 27 June 26 • 168 views
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0 retweet 0 quote tweet 7 likes
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╰┈➤ hyunjinnie
@hyvnjnn
I FEEL BAD FOR WHOEVER THE UNLUCKY MAN IS.
16:25 • 27 June 26 • 173 views
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╰┈➤ minho
@justacat
you're going to get yourself doxxed again and i'm going to be happy with my muscley man.
16:26 • 27 June 26 • 195 views
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╰┈➤ hyunjinnie
@hyvnjnn
literqlly text me you asshole
16:27 • 27 June 26 • 83 views
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0 retweet 0 quote tweet 1 likes
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Minho will text Hyunjin in a little bit. He has more things that need to be addressed.
June 27th 2026
hello chris.
16:28
Hello, Minho. I still think you size your things down.
16:31
can you not see the tag literally on the back of the shirt? for someone so pretty and muscles you sure are a little stupid.
16:32
Stupid? Hm. And no, it’s faded.
16:32
well that isn’t my fault! i don't eize my things down and i think you are just a hater.
16:33
Okay, sweetheart.
16:33
sweetheart? at least ask me how old i am before you call me cute names!
the audacity of men nowadays....
16:35
Okay, how old are you then? You are right, I should have asked.
16:36
27.
16:36
28. It's perfect.
16:37
oh, i love older men. can i meow at you?
16:38
You can do whatever your little heart desires.
16:38
minho
@justacat
oh how much i love older men.
16:40 • 27 June 26 • 2,448 views
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8 retweet 1 quote tweet 75 likes
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╰┈➤ hyunjinnie
@hyvnjnn
CAN YOU PICK UP THE DAMN PHONE
16:40 • 27 June 26 • 380 views
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June 27th 2026
i'd offer you another shirt but i lost weight and don't need a large anymore.
16:41
that's why i sold them, in fact.
16:41
I'm sure I can make the current shirt work. You seemed to like the muscle, after all.
16:42
do you flirt with every depop seller or am i special?
16:45
You're just special, sweetheart.
16:46
:)
16:46
minho
@justacat
he said i'm special. ❤️❤️
16:47 • 27 June 26 • 1,612 views
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╰┈➤ hyunjinnie
@hyvnjnn
why do YOU FUCKING HATE ME CALL ME I WANNA BE IN THE KNOW
16:47 • 27 June 26 • 73 views
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╰┈➤ minho
@justacat
i'm flirting with someone i sold a shirt to. that's all there is hyunjin.
16:48 • 27 June 26 • 94 views
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╰┈➤ hyunjinnie
@hyvnjnn
☹️☹️
16:49 • 27 June 26 • 29 views
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June 27th 2026
So, Minho.
16:57
yeeees?
16:59
Want to go out for coffee? Since you liked my muscles so much?
17:00
i thought you would never ask. :)
17:02
minho
@justacat
and i scored a date with the man who messaged me complaining on depop. what beautiful things i can do!
15:05 • 27 June 26 • 8,117 views
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33 retweet 4 quote tweet 482 likes
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╰┈➤ hyunjinnie
@hyvnjnn
i am SO SICK OF YOUR ASS OMG
17:08 • 27 June 26 • 217 views
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1 retweet 1 quote tweet 8 likes
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