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Ash wouldn't say he was a bad kid. He was a good kid, always following the rules. He dared not step out of line in fear of something terrible happening to him, like the other kids. He didn't want that to happen to him at all. It looked like it hurt. He hated pain, pain was bad. Sometimes. Cucurucho said that the pain she puts Ash through was good. He highly doubted that though. Cucurucho loved to say a bunch of stuff. Ash didn't know what was a lie anymore.
Sometimes, during curfew, Ash found himself mindlessly staring at the blank walls, visualising a more colourful wall. However, he always had to rush to his room so as not to be discovered. Bad things would happen if he was discovered, there was only so much Ash can hide from them.
But, in times like these, as Ash clutched tightly onto the white teddy as he sat on the floor, his eyes never leaving the brightly coloured crayons. He stared at the plain white quartz walls. They always made Ash feel so weird. Perhaps it was how plain it was. The walls in the experiment rooms always had splatters of crimson, they were the only ones permitted to be messy. Only those rooms. Anywhere else was forbidden else there would be consequences, bedrooms included. Cucurucho told him that decorations would be distracting. He wondered if white rooms were truly any better for experiments. They always got so messy.
The wall in front of him felt like it was taunting him. It was past curfew, and here he was. He should really leave... but, one drawing wouldn’t hurt right? He placed the teddy on the floor, muttering out an apology, before shakily wrapping his hands around a lavender crayon. Reluctantly, he sketched out a flower with heart shaped petals. His didi loved them especially, always braiding some into his hair. Few things felt right to Ash, but that seemed like it was okay to do. He gently traced his finger on the petals, ignoring how crimson slowly inked the walls, focusing on how it felt. He didn't know why he was expecting it to feel like a regular petal. Of course it wouldn't, but maybe deep down he thought it'd be similar. Oh well. He shrugged before picking up his teddy again, already mentally preparing other kids to blame.
Until his head bumped into something, hard, almost metal like. He rubbed his head before his eyes widened. Oh. He immediately clutched onto the teddy harder as Cucurucho stared down at the boy, her eyes practically burning him. He felt himself shaking as he looked up to the polar bear, a whimper involuntary leaving his mouth.
"A." He felt his back straighten involuntarily. "It's past curfew." The boy muttered an apology, bringing the teddy closer to his chest, as if it'd protect him. Cucurucho noticed the wall, before putting a claw on A's shoulder, gently digging. It felt weird. He was supposed to be used to this. Used to everything. This was a rightful punishment.
"If you're going to stay up past curfew.." Ash shut his eyes. He felt blood trickle down his shoulder staining his gown, trying so hard not to show any emotion. The glitches however, violently distorted around the wound. Cucurucho seemed to not care. She wrapped a claw around his wrist and dragged him along. No way in hell Ash wanted to try to fight back. He felt his legs practically go numb.
He didn't know how long it took to reach the room. All he knew was he was sat in a bright white chair, teddy tossed aside and his arm rested on a... table? Cucurucho held a needle in her hand, sitting down next to Ash. Purple liquid sloshed around, and he already felt his body tensing up. Why did he stay up?! He was dumb. Why did he do this to himself, this was so avo-
"This might hurt." The needle slowly inserted itself into his shoulder, and he let out a whimper.
At first, it felt like minuscule fiery ants running around inside his arm. In less than a few seconds he dug his hand into the chair, wailing. "P-please..!! It hurts, it hurts.." he bit his lip and ignored how the bear tightened the restraints on his legs. He swore he heard his own blood bubble. Glitches rapidly distorted around the wound, his bones sizzling. It hurt. But any further reactions would lead to worse. Cucurucho seemed to be satisfied, and undid his restraints. She shoved his teddy into his arms.
"Done, A. Go to your room." Ignoring how limp his arm was, he clutched onto the teddy bear and ran straight to his room, almost tripping from how weak he felt. He stumbled into the white room collapsing against the bed, finally feeling the tears roll down. In the corner of the room lays his favourite diamond toy, and he crawled to it, shakily wrapping his hands around the handle.
He wasn't confident with his left hand, but screw it. He grabbed some bandages, before slicing an 'X' in his affected shoulder, praying it'd provide some relief. Until he got carried away, cutting away blindly at his shoulder. Trying anything to decrease the pain, trying to overpower the burning with a different type of sting. It helped,weirdly. He took in a deep breath before wrapping the silky bandages around it, using his teeth to cut it. Blood immediately soaked it. He returned the diamond toy to its rightful place, before jumping up on the bed. Thankfully, the pain wasn't as bad now. But the cuts stung. He placed the teddy next to him, before laying down, staring up at the ceiling.
He was stupid. A dumb kid. He turnt over. If only he followed instructions, he wouldn't have to deal with the pain. It was stupid. Everything was stupid. He slowly traced the tag on his ears, hating how it felt. He couldn't rip it out. If he ripped it out, his ear would be sliced apart. Tears filled his eyes as he tried to close his eyes, head racing with thoughts he dared not want to ponder on.
In the morning, as he walked past the white room again, the blood on the walls dried, and the flower was erased. He sniffled, holding onto his teddy tighter before going to breakfast. He didn't want to be last. Punishment would happen once again.
Cucurucho wouldn't be nice this time.