Today, 4:43 PM
- silly string
- gang i cannot keep swinging past msg
- i don't even know how it's possible but they keep thinking i'm not the real dude
- i have ice-cream on my suit again it’s so sticky guys
- need leds
- DID THEY THROW ICECREAM AT YOU
- LMFAOOOOOOOO
- silly string
- i just don't understand. how would i be a fake
- i am literally IN THE AIR
- em jay🖤
- average new yorker versus common sense
- need leds
- If only they could see your glorious muscles from the ground
- Then there would be no doubt
- silly string
- i'm so tired 😭
- em jay🖤
- are you coming to class tmrw peter
- silly string
- yes! why
- em jay🖤
- think about it???
- silly string
- thinking
- yes im coming to decathlon
- em jay🖤
- Ned.
- need leds
- He ASKED
- em jay🖤
- i'm putting you both next to flash
- table for people with no backbone
- silly string
- ☹️
- need leds
- Flash is gonna make me answer his quiz questions if you sit me next to him
- em jay🖤
- what's the quiz on
- need leds
- History
- silly string
- he's asking you for history???
- em jay🖤
- damn
- he doesn't value his grades ig
- need leds
- em jay🖤
- lol
- silly string
- ohs hit got to go i hear distress
- need leds
- "I hear distress" bro thinks he's an avenger 😂😂😂😂😂💀💀💀💀💀
- em jay🖤
- honorary avenger
- need leds
- Dont get shot again tho pete thanks for keeping our city safe n all that 🫡
- em jay🖤
- “again” 😔
- need leds
- HES JUST
- I THOUGHT HE COULD DUCK BULLETS AND STUFF
- THE LITERAL BLOOD STAINS ON MY CARPET SAYS OTHERWISE
- em jay🖤
- skill issue just clean blood better
- need leds
- you say that like you just KNOW how to clean blood. like that's a normal thing
- em jay🖤
- think about it
- need leds
- Thinking
- Shit nvm I cant even ask Peter for backup bc he's on patrol
- I'm just gonna go with the cool mysterious idea that you're up to some shady business and I'm not going to ask questions about it
- em jay🖤
- uterus
- need leds
- OHHHH
- The monthly witch's sacrament
- em jay🖤
- everyday i ask god why i'm friends with you two and everyday she refuses to answer me
- silly string
- i was gone for five seconds hwhat
- em jay🖤
- welcome back, public enemy no1. what was the distress
- silly string
- ok i'm gomna choose to ignore the blatant name calling
- gotdog guy arguing w the slushy guy again
- need leds
- AINT NO WAY
- em jay🖤
- ??????
- need leds
- MJ DO YOU NOTCKNOW ABOUT THE SLUSHY HOTDOG FEUD
- em jay🖤
- wtf are you talking about
- wait is this what you meant when you told me the other day to not buy hotdogs off 3rd ave
- silly string
- no that's different
- need leds
- Wait What's wrong w the hotdog stand on 3rd
- silly string
- i've had to talk to him like three times on patrol to stop creeping on girls that r walking by
- em jay🖤
- gross. what's his ip
- ned
- need leds
- Are you trying to get me to use my powers for evil
- em jay🖤
- does this look like evil-doing to you
- need leds
- ...
- need leds
- Give me one second
- silly string
- no need
- Mr stark is taking care of it
- if he randomly goes missing don't question it too much
- em jay🖤
- won't need to question it at all if i get to him first
- silly string
- terrifying! 🥰
- need leds
- I'm just glad that it's not directed at us anymore though
- em jay🖤
- we’re getting off topic, what the hell is the slushy hotdog feud
- silly string
- oh yeah so basically on 71st st there's this slushy guy that keeps coming up with the most disgusting flavors i've ever imagined in my life
- last time i swung by this guy was doing pickle slushies or something like i can't make this stuff up
- need leds
- Didnt you say one time he had like a toothpaste slushy or something rank like that
- silly string
- yes. weirdly i dont think it was that bad. like the worst part was my mint gum
- em jay🖤
- 🤨
- silly string
- so slushy guy is infamous in that part of the neighborhood basically
- but then there's HOTDOG GUY
- need leds
- Hotdog guy the goat actually
- Glizzy goat
- em jay🖤
- 👎
- silly string
- he's new i think?? but he strolled up and he's like, he's the most serious hot dog guy
- like ever, probably
- em jay🖤
- can one be serious about hot dogs?
- silly string
- this guy can. this guy can
- apparently he's from chicago so he's like, he makes chicago hot dogs (?) and he hates slushy guy. he literally. he hates slushy guy so much
- and slushy guy is so funny abt it bc he keeps setting up right next to him and asking him about whether he thinks mustard or ketchup slushies would be a hit and rhat they could be business partners
- i have had to break up a fight like every two weeks it's insane
- need leds
- Dope
- em jay🖤
- enemies to lovers slow burn 500k word
- need leds
- Hashtag whaf dat mean
- silly string
- lol
Today, 9:31 PM
- silly string
- MJ
- MJ
- MJ
- mj
- what
- are you ok
- are you dying
- silly string
- no
- mj
- no you're not ok or no you're not dying
- silly string
- no i'm fine!! promise
- can you help me i'm doing lit homework:(
- mj
- sorry i cant read
- silly string
- PLEASE ☹️
- Is this bc i accidentally ripped your sweater :( i stitched it back for you :(
- mj
- lol🖤
- silly string
- what are you doing rn
- mj
- rereading pride and prejudice :]
-
silly string
-
thafs not the book we're doing the report on??
-
wait shit is it
-
do i have the wrong book
-
mj
-
no of course not, you're not that stupid
-
... what book do you have though.
-
silly string
-
photo of dorian grey
-
mj
-
picture of dorian grey
-
mj
-
regardless. i must break the news to you
-
mj
-
you have the wrong book
-
that's the one she assigned to the honors class
-
silly string
-
aurghrhhh
-
do you know which one do i need
-
mj
-
your period was assigned wuthering heights
-
do you have a copy?
-
silly string
-
i'll look around, may might
-
mj
-
do you have patrol tonight?
-
silly string
-
mmm nope i finished earlier why
-
mj
-
come on over, ill lend you my copy
-
mj
-
yeah
-
get here in fifteen minutes and you won't miss mr darcy proposing
-
silly string
-
ok, ill see u soon ily
-
mj
-
lyt. bring your homework with you
-
nerd
Yesterday, 7:29 PM
- flash
- PETER
Yesterday, 9:42 PM
- silly string
- oh my god what
- why are you yelling
- flash
- Caps lock
- Didn’t mean to
- silly string
- what is it
- flash
- Were presenting our phys thing tomorrow
- silly string
- yeah i know???
- flash
- Dont skip
Today, 1:42 AM
- silly string
- was not planning to
Today, 7:43 AM
- tony
- Get out of school free card.
- Trouble downtown, would be a good opportunity for some onsite training. What say you?
- tony
- Offer’s going fast.
- silly string
- hes
- jges
- fhes
- yes
- tony
- Don’t hurt yourself.
- silly string
- yes
- silly string
- gotta be back in school for fourth period tho
- tony
- Sure.
- silly string
- ok so do you want me to swing over there or do you have other plans
- tony
- I’m outside.
- silly string
- oh!! ok
- do i wear my suit outside??
- tony
- Not unless you want Martha down the hall knowing that you're Spider-Man.
- silly string
- i don’t live next to a martha??
- oh that was a joke
- tony
- Get outside, kid.
- silly string
- brt
Today, 10:01 AM
- flash
- Peter
- flash
- Where the hell are you
- Peter we present third in the class
- flash
- YOU SAID YOU WERENT SKIPPING YOU ASSHOLE
- flash
- Second presenters are up Peter I swear to god
- WHERE ARE YOU!!!!
- PETER!!!!
- 😡😡😡😡😡😡
- silly string
- SrIRY IA AM RRNTING TO CLASF RIGHT NIW
- flash
- You are the WORST
Today, 11:24 AM
- em jay🖤
- public service announcement
- silly string
- please.
- em jay🖤
- we as a collective need to make sure peter doesn't walk through the school doors without being thoroughly checked for evidence
- need leds
- Ayo??
- silly string
- i dont wanna talk about it
- need leds
- 🍅🍅🍅
- em jay🖤
- too bad! guess what i just watched this loser do
- need leds
- What did he do..
- em jay🖤
- bro gave an entire presentation with flash and the whole time is mask is STICKING OUT OF HIS BACK POCKET
- need leds
- PETER 💀💀💀
- em jay🖤
- from me trying to let him know that his mask is VISIBLE
- to flash who keeps trying to see what tf is sticking out of his pocket
- to peter. who won't shut up about magnetism.
- what a class. holy shit
- need leds
- I wish I had physics with you guys my class was boring as hell
- Wait so did flash see the mask or what
- em jay🖤
- i mean
- he got close enough to grab the mask but then peter must have bugged out or something bc he went completely frozen and grabbed flash's arm
- silly string
- senses :(
- em jay🖤
- so the mask was just. sitting there. and of course both of them are now looking like fish out of water. so i said a joke and had to deflect for them
- need leds
- Michelle jones mvp where would we be without you
- em jay🖤
- i dread to imagine it
- silly string
- i have had a very long and hard day.
- need leds
- It's fine dude!! now you can just solo as our school's infamous spider-man cosplayer
- em jay🖤
- gonna have to battle flash for the spidey no1 fan title
- silly string
- just say you hate me
Today, 2:21 AM
- silly string
- you
- literally you
- tony
- Why, pray tell, are you awake right now?
- silly string
- lol
- i'm at ned's
- tony
- Are you two doing drugs? It's 2:30 in the morning, go to sleep
- silly string
- it’s a three day weekend, we're watching minecraft args
- why are YOU awake mr stark
- tony
- Because I am a legal adult with a fully developed brain, and I can do what I want.
- tony
- Did you watch a movie called The Rizzle on my account?
- silly string
- the what💀💀💀💀💀💀
- tony
- The Rizzle. It's on my continue watching
- Figured it was you, because it's next to all your cartoons and your documentaries
- silly string
- lol uhhh. no i don't believe so
- prob auto play or something
- tony
- You do realize you have your own account.
- You can put all of this junk on there.
- silly string
- where's the fun in that 😕
- tony
- You give me agita
- silly string
- don't pretend you weren't watching one piece with me
- tony
- Go to sleep.
- silly string
- lol gn
Today, 6:04 PM
- silly string
- for totally no particular reason, did a new shipment of meds get dropped off by the tower yet
- the big t stark
- Hm.
- silly string
- pain meds
- specifically
- the big t stark
- Is this a 911 question or a "refilling my first aid kit" question?
- silly string
- secret third thing, actually
- may💛
- 🤨
- silly string
- not an emergency but i *may* have collided with a building
- vertical road rash but not a road
- building rash
- may💛
- ... 🤦♀️ What am I gonna do with you?
- silly string
- keep me hopefully idk
- may💛
- Well, DUH. That's out of the question by now, baby
- Are you okay? Make sure you disinfect that before you wrap it.
- silly string
- it's already wrapped it just like. stings really bad
- the big t stark
- I'm sure that didn't tickle, but those pain meds are pretty hefty stuff. Not sure if you should take it for some scrapes.
- silly string
- huh? i'm not
- i broke my arm
- may💛
- 🤬!!
- the big t stark
- Right.
- May, dearie, you want to take this one?
- may💛
- I'll allow you the honors😡.
- the big t stark
- What's your 20, Pete.
- silly string
- why do i hear boss music.
- 😞 see u at the tower mr stark
- may💛
- For the record— I keep a spare bottle of your crazy pain meds in the white cabinet of the bathroom. But NEVER do this again!
- silly string
- thank you may you're my favorite drug dealer
- may💛
- Ooohhh this kid! 🤦♀️
Yesterday, 1:29 PM
- flash
- are you showing up to the thing?
- silly string
- what
- flash
- the fundraiser event thing, are you going or not
- silly string
- ???
- flash
- parker are you for real right now
- did you listen at all during todays meeting
- silly string
- that's a great question
- when is the event
- flash
- the tenth. its the tenth. after school. at 6pm. we were all told to go. to help raise money.
- silly string
- yes the event at school at 6pm to raise money of course yeah i remember that one
- flash
- your such a bad fucking liar
- once again im asking ARE YOU GOING OR NOT
- silly string
- uhhh i don't know
- flash
- you dont know.
- silly string
- i don't know
- flash
- do you have gang activities that day, parker? you expecting some orders from the mafia or something?
- silly string
- so close! still not in a gang
- flash
- are you planning on bleeding out that day for other reasons then
- silly string
- you will never let that go huh
- flash
- it happened three times, asshat
- which is three times more than it should
- I think im allowed to harp on you about it
- silly string
- disregarding that
- uhh i will see if i can make it idk i'm not feeling good rn
- flash
- fuck ok
- silly string
- i'm not bleeding out in a bathroom put your hand down
- flash
- .... I wasn't raising my hand
- silly string
- sure
- flash
- shut up
- idiot
- what's wrong then
- silly string
- flash
- how are you not dead at any given moment
- silly string
- i like to think it's because im smart
- flash
- good thing stark doesn't pay you for thinking
- silly string
- i mean
- he kinda does
- silly string
- you can't just leave me on read because you know i'm right
- flash
- 🖕
Today, 3:47 PM
- silly string
- please convince me to go to the fundraising thing
- mj
- ? what’s up
- silly string
- my nervous system is shot
- mj
- oh :[
- sleep thing? or did you get hurt last night
- silly string
- whywould that matter
- mj
- you said once that injuries mess with your sensitivity?
- silly string
- Oh
- yeah
- i did say that
- mj
- so did you??
- get hurt?
- silly string
- just a little scratch its healing fairly well
- its sweet that u worry about me though
- :)
- mj
- well you just give me so many reasons 😒
- you don’t have to go to the fundraiser. i’m not going either. none of the money goes to teachers or staff, it’s all bullshit
- silly string
- ughhh mj you’re supposed to tell me to suck it up bc school events are important and everyone is expecting me to be there
- mj
- school events are important if they’re community driven! like decathlon! and art shows! and plays! and even the sports events! but no, this one isn’t important
- and why would i gaf about other people’s expectations of you
- go take a nap
- silly string
- can i come over and sleep next to you while you read
- mj
- sure. :]
- my dad is at work late, so i’m probably going to order dinner
- silly string
- you put in the order and i’ll pick it up on the way?
- mj
- alright. i’m going to order palestinian food from the place on 9th ave, do you want your usual?
- silly string
- yes please :) thank you em
- mj
- 🖤
Today, 3:03 AM
- silly string
- ok kindly ignore how late it is
- google says my stab wound got infected this is objectively bad right
- wow hi everybody i just watched everyone go online so fast!!
- em jay🖤
- Peter.
- need leds
- You better give the best man speech at my wedding ur literally the reason I'm in a deeply committed relationship with webmd
- silly string
- it's ok guys i was joking
- em jay🖤
- you when you lie
- “it’s just a scratch!” you pmo
- need leds
- 🤯
- silly string
- i was joking in the way that i already took meds and im healing already but it does hurt
- is it possible to die of sepsis from infected stab wound
- sepsis still exists right
- em jay🖤
- you're so stupid. how are you so stupid. peter. i'm begging you.
- need leds
- Google confirms sepsis still exists
- Do you hav e blisters around the . cant believe I'm about to say this. Stab wound
- silly string
- no sir
- need leds
- Do you have a fever
- silly string
- no sir
- need leds
- Confusion or delirium
- silly string
- no more than usual
- em jay🖤
- shit he's septic isn't he. oh well
- need leds
- 😢
- em jay🖤
- it was nice knowing you peter
- silly string
- you're laughing. there is OOZE coming out of a hole in my leg that is going to kill me and you're laughing.
- em jay🖤
- yes. haha
- need leds
- Gross
- TMI 😕
- silly string
- sorry ned.
- need leds
- silly string
- lmao. i'll keep the pictures to mr stark then
- need leds
- Are you going to school tomorrow
- silly string
- should be!
- em jay🖤
- if you come to school tomorrow i'm going to kick your ass so hard you wish you died of sepsis
- silly string
- need leds
- I'll get your notes for you lol
- Is that the guy from the video in history
- em jay🖤
- there was a lesson that had colonel rhodes mentioned in it last week, yes
- absolutely shocking that you remember
- silly string
- dude 😭😭 that’s mr stark's best friend bro, that’s iron patriot
- need leds
- Oh
- My b💀 forgot
- silly string
- please don't be offended by this but you don't need to take my history notes. please don't take my history notes
- need leds
- All I do for you ....
- em jay🖤
- i'll get them, peter
- silly string
- ty:)
- need leds
- Have you met him
- silly string
- who
- need leds
- The guy. War machine. the guy
- silly string
- unfortunately
- i don't think he likes me
- need leds
- BOO 👎
- em jay🖤
- somehow i doubt that
- whags your proof
- *what's
- need leds
- whags
- silly string
- whags
- em jay🖤
- 😐
- silly string
- he lowk threatened to spray me with raid
- need leds
- LMFAOOOO WHAT
- silly string
- yeah when we first met and tony explained the whole. you know
- em jay🖤
- ohhh my god
- silly string
- idk maybe he doesn't like spiders or something
- need leds
- Oh btw dude I killed a spider yesterday 🙁it scared me and I slapped it
- silly string
- bro...
- need leds
- Had to wash the guts from my hand away down the drain 🙁
- silly string
- that's disgusting
- need leds
- Oh so you can share your messed up leg but I can't share my spider homicide
- silly string
- that's different
- you just confessed to murdering my brethren
- need leds
- Being so so real I kept waiting for like ten minutes after if you were going to text me
- silly string
- ??
- need leds
- Idk maybe you felt it or something
- silly string
- THE SPIDER?
- need leds
- Yeah like
- Yeah
- silly string
- LMAOOO?
- need leds
- I think we've exhausted Mj
- She's given up
- em jay🖤
- yeah frankly i've seen enough
- silly string
- em jay🖤
- me fr.
- it's almost 4am, if peter isn't dying again then i'm going back to sleep
- silly string
- man :(
- you all make it seem like i'm so terrible at my job
- need leds
- Bro thinks he's getting paid
- Peter no offense but you literally have. A stab wound right now
- I feel like you're supposed to dodge those or something
- silly string
- it's not as easy as it is in mortal kombat ok sometimes its hard
- em jay🖤
- "it's not as easy as it is in mortal kombat ok sometimes its hard" - thee biblical spider-man
- silly string
- ok just say u hate me
- em jay🖤
- go to sleep so your STAB WOUND can heal you idiot
- need leds
- Seconded
- Please get better before decathlon I don't want to be partnered with Betty again
- silly string
- ?? what's wrong with betty
- need leds
- She smells like roses and everytime I sit next to her I forget the answers to the questions
- silly string
- oh 💀
- em jay🖤
- you're kidding.
- need leds
- If you want you can find out yourself on Tuesday
- em jay🖤
- unfortunately i believe you
- alright then. guess that's something i'll need to add to the official seating chart
- now go to sleep. all of you.
- silly string
- yes my liege 🫡
- need leds
- 🫡
