Work Text:
It's late. At least one in the morning, when Zanka finally gets back to headquarters.
He doesn't usually mind getting back late depending on the following day's schedule, but today was later than usual. It was a job with Follo, Gris and a few other Supporters, an easy clean-up, not far from headquarters. Gris invited them to eat, they happened to meet up with some Supporters from the South branch that both he and Follo are friends with, and here they are. One in the morning.
They quietly part ways at the back entrance. Follo tells him to take it easy, and there’s a glint of concern in his eyes that Zanka tries to wave off.
Zanka has to be careful to not wake anyone with the sound of his boots echoing as he walks down the halls. He's planning to just head to the laundry area to grab his clean clothes, and then back to his room. Ideally, he'd love to shower, bathe, something. His body hurts, and hot, or even just warm water would really do him some good, but it would make too much noise at this hour. He's already used his warm water tickets for this month anyway, but he's considering asking to buy some off of Riyo or Enjin, at least for tomorrow.
He trudges through the hallway, headed for the laundry room on the basement floor. He thinks he may have pulled something on his side, every step he makes on that side of his body comes with a pulse of pain, but it's entirely possible it's still his leg.
This was Zanka's first job since he was bedridden. Enjin allowed it, because Gris would be there. He refused to admit it to any of them afterward, but his whole body hurts. He doesn't feel well. He thinks he was just stagnant for too long. He thinks Gris could tell by the end of the dinner, because it was just after a moment of brief eye contact with Zanka when he decided to wrap things up. And obviously, Follo had picked up on something too.
Zanka groans to himself. He hates making other people worry about him. That’s been the worst part about the whole ordeal.
He just needs some rest, and he'll be fine in the morning. Maybe he'll see if he has any tea leaves left. That would probably help him feel better.
The lights to the laundry room are on. Not totally uncommon, but not typical, either. Zanka likes using this laundry room because most prefer the convenience of the ones on the dorm floors. There's less wait in the basement floor, even though it's a little creepy down there.
Zanka knocks on the open door as he walks in, to make sure he doesn't scare anyone. No one reacts. No one is standing inside, even in the smaller folding room towards the back. The tiny flickering light from the bulb illuminating the room hurts his eyes, and he decides he need to wrap it up in here before it gives him a headache.
The sink is full of soap and water, though, a sign someone has been here recently. Someone's probably soaking something.
Zanka walks toward the folding room, where he left his clean clothes. He usually leaves his boots and outerwear here so that he doesn't have to take dirty clothes and shoes to his room, but as he's walking, he notices someone's left a pile of clothes on the floor by the wall. Irritating. Why would -
Wait.
“...Rudo?”
It is Rudo, for sure. He's curled up against the wall, oversized t-shirt and baggy sweatpants that really made it look like there wasn't a person inside them, for a second. His face is pressed against the tile floor. He's breathing. Alive. Is he sleeping?
“Hey, what're you…”
Zanka isn't really sure what to do here.
Rudo doesn't react to Zanka's presence at all. His arms are tucked into his chest. He doesn't seem to be asleep, though. It might be that he's injured, but Zanka's pretty sure he had the day off today.
“Hey,” Zanka says, kneeling down in front of Rudo's curled up form. It hurts, puts a little too much strain on his leg, but he tries to ignore it. Rudo still doesn't give him any sign that he's totally there, so Zanka gently lands a hand on his shoulder. He often forgets how small he is. “you hearin’ me?”
Rudo's eyes peer up once he feels Zanka's contact. A tiny, pained whimper. He looks like a wet kitten left out in the rain.
“You hurt or somethin’?” Zanka asks him. He tries to keep his voice low. Rudo just barely shakes his head.
Zanka figures out pretty quickly why he's so meek right now. The pieces are all there. He's not wearing his gloves. He's washing them, that's what was soaking in the sink. He's seen him wash them there before, but he doesn't typically leave them to soak. Something else must be going on.
Rudo hasn't been super up front about it, but Zanka has been able to figure out that taking off those gloves causes him pain. He doesn't know why. He's seen the bandages. He's figured that it was some sort of injury when he first fell from the Sphere - Enjin did say Alice took a look at him before Zanka even met him, but the more he's able to figure out, the more he wonders what on earth his hands are so wrapped up for, why he wears those gloves in the first place.
“What're you doin’ in here?” Zanka asks.
“Floor's cold,” he says bluntly, his voice quiet and pained. Zanka can hardly hear him.
The floor is cold? What does that have to do with his hands?
Zanka changes positions so that he's on his knees instead of in a squat, which doesn’t hurt quite as much, and he reaches forward and lays a hand flush against his forehead for a few seconds. Rudo flinches at the sudden touch, his eyes screwing shut, but he relaxes at the feeling.
Oh, he has a fever. Of course. Now everything really makes sense. He was soaking his gloves to clean them, but Zanka isn't really sure where the fever started playing a role - maybe he already had one, and it made his pain worse, or if his pain got so bad that it caused a fever. He hopes he isn't sick.
“How long've ya’ been out here, Rudo?” Zanka asks, slowly pulling his hand away but Rudo tilts toward him to follow the cool touch, and groans when it's gone. Rudo doesn't answer the question. Zanka can't tell if he's just confused or half asleep. He places a hand underneath the shoulder that’s on the floor to try and urge Rudo into sitting up, and he does so, very reluctantly.
Zanka's chest feels tight. He hates that he was by himself all this time. He doubts anyone happened to come by in the time he was down here, otherwise, they would have at least taken him back to his room.
Well, you're here now, so do something.
“Stay here, yeah? Let me get these dryin’ so you can wear ‘em sooner…” Zanka says, planning on standing and turning toward the sink.
Rudo's hand reaches out, though, and completely stops Zanka in his tracks.
Rudo's eyes well up with tears. Zanka can't tell why, at least not right away. He flinches back, wondering if he's done something wrong, something to scare him, but the look in his eyes says something completely different.
“Hey…hold on, don't…”
He's not good at this. He's never had to take care of someone younger than him. He didn’t have very good role models for it, either.
That doesn't mean he shouldn't try, though.
Zanka reaches forward to hold him.
Rudo cries for a long time. Zanka has a feeling it's not just his hands, but he's sure that fever is playing a hand in heightening his emotions. Zanka's been through similar feelings, only with him, it's a usually a through-the-roof anxiety if his fevers get high enough. He understands, so he doesn’t have any room to judge at all. He just wishes he knew why, or at least knew what to say.
He doesn't let go, as long as Rudo cries. He holds his head underneath his chin, arms secure around him, but not tight enough to hurt him. It doesn’t seem to get worse at any point, but after a few minutes, Zanka wonders if he should start being concerned.
Eventually, though, he doesn’t hear anything anymore.
Zanka loosens his hold on him, and gently leans him against the wall. His eyes are red from crying, but Zanka can’t tell if the blotchy pink is from that or the fever. He still sniffles, his eyes not moving from the floor, not looking anywhere near Zanka. His eyes trail down to his hands, loosely lying in his lap like he’s afraid to move them. The bandages look like they need to be replaced - they’re dirty, and it doesn’t seem like Rudo is in any condition to change them himself.
“Just one second,” Zanka tells him, swiftly standing so that he can make sure to get Rudo’s gloves drying. He rinses the soapy water off of them as the rest drains from the sink, and he’s extremely careful as he wrings the water out of them. It’s not easy, it’s a thick, leather-like material and the metal bits make it difficult to wring them out properly, but he does the best he can. He hopes Rudo is okay with him handling his Vital Instrument like this, but he doesn’t give any objections. If he can really comprehend it, anyway.
There’s bandage materials on a lower shelf, off in the corner hiding beside some detergent. It appeared shortly after Rudo arrived with them, and it makes perfect sense that it’s his, now that he’s stopped to think about it. He takes the bandage roll before he turns back to Rudo.
“Let me change these for you,” Zanka says, kneeling in front of him. He's not sure how Rudo usually likes these covered up, but he figures if he does it wrong, he can just fix it in the morning.
Rudo looks hesitant when Zanka reaches a hand out to take his.
“Tell me if it hurts and I’ll stop,” Zanka says, “‘kay?”
“M’kay,” Rudo mumbles.
He’s careful, as gently as possible as he lifts Rudo’s arm by his elbow. Rudo is very clearly in pain, Zanka’s paying close attention to how he’s holding his breath, but it goes away after a few seconds. It was probably that initial movement that hurt. Zanka’s free hand finds the end of the wrap, and starts to peel it back, slowly.
Zanka's stomach turns when he sees what's underneath these bandages.
He can't even really describe what he's looking at. They're unhealing wounds. He feels like he's looking at a decaying corpse, except Rudo's musculature is all intact, like a live human. Zanka’s never seen anything like it. He tries to keep up with his first aid skills the best he can, and he’s seen burns, chemical injuries, the works - this is totally new to him.
Were his hands always like this?
What on earth happened to him up there?
“Zanka?”
“Yeah?” Zanka replies, his eyes not moving from the wrappings. He’s removed the bandage on this arm completely now, and he starts the new roll at his fingers, careful as he unrolls the bandage.
“How d'you sit like that?” Rudo murmurs.
“Like what?” Zanka looks down. He's sitting how he always does on the floor, on his knees with his shins tucked neatly underneath.
“Hurts when I do it,” Rudo says.
Zanka tries to resist a smile. It’s a little funny to imagine Rudo unsuccessfully copying him. “Y'tried to, huh?”
“Mhm,” Rudo answers.
Zanka had never considered that it might be difficult for other people to do. He’s seen Riyo and Enjin do it before, but Enjin acts like his knees are going to pop out every time he stands from that position. Honestly, it’s not awfully comfortable right now because of that leg injury, but he doesn’t think sitting any other way would be better.
“I was, kinda…trained to sit like this,” Zanka explains as the wrap travels up to Rudo’s wrist, “got used to it. Jus’ feels the most natural.”
“Trained? Why?”
Rudo always has questions that Zanka isn't prepared to answer.
“I dunno, exactly. It's…polite, I guess,” Zanka explains, but he doesn’t know the reason himself. If it was culture, if it was professionalism - another piece of his upbringing that’s so deeply ingrained in him that he can’t separate from his daily life at all, even completely unbeknownst to him.
Zanka manages to get Rudo's hands bandaged. Rudo’s quiet for the rest of it - just chatty for that one moment, but his eyes never really shut like he’s trying to sleep.
Once he finishes, though, and his eyes move up to Rudo’s face because a sniffle caught his attention, and there’s tears in his eyes again. He seems to be trying really hard not to let them fall, even tilting his head back a little but, but he loses that battle pretty quick. Zanka’s shoulders sink.
“Hey…why're you cryin’?” Zanka asks him, although he thinks that even if Rudo were lucid, he wouldn't be able to answer that well. “‘m I hurting you?”
Rudo shakes his head, looking like he thought about bringing up his hands to his eyes to rub away tears, but he decides against it. He’s not quite at that point yet, it seems like.
“We should get you to bed,” Zanka tells him. If he’s liking that cold feeling, maybe he can get some cold wash cloths, or even icepacks for his hands. He wonders if he’s tried that before. “Can ya’ walk?”
He doesn't think he's in a good enough physical condition himself to carry Rudo, but he'll try if he needs to. Rudo looks like he weighs next to nothing, anyway.
Rudo nods, though, getting to his feet way faster than he should have, and nearly toppling over as a result. Zanka manages to catch him just in time, taking his arm by his elbow just above where the bandages stop to steady him. He sees his expression tense up at the touch. He’s noticed that Rudo never seems to be able to stand up quickly without getting a little dizzy, but of course, it’s especially bad right now.
“Easy,” Zanka warns him, keeping him steady. “Let’s walk together.”
It’s not difficult. Rudo actually does fairly well. Zanka wonders if he didn’t have the courage to put pressure on his wounded hands by himself to sit back up and stand, but now with a second person, there’s an adrenaline rush to prove he can do it.
Zanka walks Rudo to his room, just a few doors down from his own. He’s heard that Rudo doesn’t keep his door locked, for some reason, so all he has to do is turn the handle. He walks him over to the bed, where he sits down, and breathes a little heavier than Zanka thinks he should for a few minutes. That doesn’t sound good. He very cautiously lays a hand down against the edge of the bed to keep himself steady, because evidently, he’s still dizzy - but he flinches as soon as his hand touches the bed.
“Lay down,” Zanka says, pressing a hand against his shoulder and another behind his back, to guide him down to the bed without pushing him. Rudo groans, but he obliges, at least, letting out a deep sigh once he’s laid back against his pillow. “I’m gonna get some things for you. Be right back.”
Zanka wanders back into his room. He still has a few pills left from what Eishia got for him. He shakes it, holds it up to the light to double check. Two. It's general, high-strength pain medication and a fever reducer. Zanka isn't allowed to keep medication in his room, but she told him to keep this one aside in case the abdominal pain from his injury and the poison came back - since it usually gets worse at night. Clearly, Rudo needs it more than he does. Besides, he's felt fine the last couple of days. It's just bad today because of the job.
He takes that pill bottle, and then heads down to the common area to grab a water bottle, two ice packs and some wash cloths. That should work for now.
Zanka sits on the floor beside Rudo’s bed, pouring small amounts of water over the washcloths until they’re damp enough to lay over Rudo’s forehead, and then he sets them over on the night stand. There’s still enough water in the bottle for him to take one of the pills with.
He stands, and sort of urges Rudo to sit up. He’s half asleep, at this point. Zanka helps give him some leverage with a hand on his back so that he doesn’t have to use his arms to prop himself up.
“Take this, ‘kay?” Zanka tells him. He hands him one of the pills and the water bottle. “With the water.”
“Wh'is it?” Rudo murmurs, his tired eyes observing the little pill. Zanka thinks he probably would've fallen asleep if he hadn't interrupted his peace.
“Pain medicine,” Zanka says. “Should help.”
“Isn’ this…hard t'get?” Rudo asks.
“Take the damn medicine,” Zanka tells him. It is hard to get, generally. It’s expensive, Zanka had to pay for these. He doesn't need him worrying about any of that. He doesn’t want him to completely suffer while they’re waiting on those gloves to dry.
Rudo whines in response, but extends a shaky hand to take the pill. Zanka realizes that this needs both of his hands, but he thinks it might be a little dehumanizing for him to be fed a pill and water by another person, so he’ll avoid it unless it seems Rudo is really struggling.
He takes the pill into his mouth, and with a shaky hand, takes the water bottle too. He has a harder time holding onto that, and he manages to spill a good pit past his lips when he tries to take a sip too, but he gets enough to swallow the pill. He looks a little distraught for a few seconds that he’s wasted water, but Zanka takes the bottle and assures him it’s fine. It’s just a little bit.
Once he gets Rudo to lie back down, he takes one of the washcloths from the bedside table. He doesn't think Rudo is actually sick, he thinks all of that was coming from that intense pain, but he needs to get his temperature down regardless. It'd probably keep him feel a lot better to have something cool on his skin anyway.
He lays it over his forehead. Rudo makes a noise of discomfort. It’s probably a weird feeling, but he gets used to it quickly enough that his eyes relax again.
He wonders for a while what he should do. He thinks he might just sit with Rudo for a while longer, wait for his gloves to dry, but he realizes that might take ages. Rudo doesn’t seem to be doing too well, either. He’s trying to rest, but the pain in his hands is making it really difficult. He can’t lie still at all. He makes little noises every now and then, almost like an injured puppy.
Zanka’s had to deal with painful recoveries before, but never anything like this. He wonders if this is something Rudo has had for a really long time.
“You feel really hot, huh?” Zanka asks, pushing his bangs out of his face and seeing how much sweat has already collected in his hairline. He doesn't seem to be tolerating it well at all. It’s not really a good temperature in here. Zanka was considering for a while taking his uniform top because he’s sort of hot himself, and he ends up doing that anyway, now just in his undershirt. “I’m gonna go find a hair dryer or somethin’ to get your gloves dry enough to wear. That cool?”
Rudo gives him a tiny nod. Zanka makes sure he’s at least partially covered with his blanket for comfort purposes before he leaves Rudo’s bedroom.
He knows there’s a hair dryer in that laundry room somewhere, he’s used it before, when there aren’t any available in the shower rooms, but of course, it takes him forever to find. Rummaging through drawers, checking shelves, only for it to be in plain sight right over the laundry machines. He realizes he’s sweating after looking for it.
“Come on,” he grumbles. He doesn’t break a sweat after most of his jobs, but it happens after looking for a damn hair dryer. He shouldn’t have taken so much time off recovering. It’s really negatively affected him.
He clips the gloves on a laundry line and puts the dryer on its highest and hottest setting to speed up the process, but making sure it’s not too close. He doesn’t want to damage the material. Zanka is well aware he’s a slightly impatient person and this probably isn’t the job for someone like him, but he wants to make sure Rudo can get these back as soon as possible.
His arms get sore after a while for some reason. He tries to push through it, but he gives up, sitting down on the floor and taking the gloves down to try them there instead.
Damn, he’s exhausted. He feels his vision rock back and forth after he sits down, like his brain was hoping for him to lie down instead.
After what feels like an eternity, he has them dry enough, he thinks. The kind of dry that could probably use ten more minutes in a dryer, but would take forty five with a hair dryer. He’s sure Rudo won’t quite mind that.
He stands up way too fast, and nearly knocks over a shelf when he uses it to catch himself.
He stares at the floor for a few seconds, breathing heavy because that came so out of nowhere that he honestly frightened himself. His eyes are doing the same thing like before, swinging back and forth, colors blurring together. What on earth was that? He’s been beyond tired before, but not to this point. It feels like he almost passed out.
“Everythin’ good in here?”
Semiu comes in with a laundry basket, a brow raised at Zanka, her glasses on top of her head to make room for an under-eye mask she has on.
“Yeah, jus’...dropped this,” Zanka says, conveniently having left the hair dryer on the floor. Semiu doesn’t seem entirely suspicious, and wanders over to the washer to start throwing her clothes inside. Zanka carefully wraps the cord around the hair dryer, and places it back on top of the shelf, this time, moving much slower.
“What are you doing up so late?” Semiu asks him.
“Helpin’ Rudo out. He was washin’ his gloves and I dried ‘em,” Zanka says, carefully taking them. He could ask her the same, but he knows she has to do all sorts of things at crazy hours as the headquarters receptionist, and it seems like now is her time to do some things for herself.
“Make sure you get some sleep. You and Enjin have an eight AM tomorrow,” Semiu reminds him.
Dammit. He does. He knew that, but it slipped his mind in all of the commotion with Rudo. It’s a job with Enjin too. He needs to be in the best shape possible. He’ll bring the gloves back to Rudo, make sure he’s okay for the night, and try his best to get some sleep before he has to head out for the job in the morning. Seems like a good plan.
“Night, Semiu,” Zanka tells her as he walks out of the room.
“How do you say it again?” she asks.
Zanka groans.
“You tell Enjin all the time. I don’t get to know?”
“Oyasumi,” he tells her with a sigh. Her and Enjin always ask him how to say certain words in the Kamuatari language, and recently, Riyo has started joining in too. Semiu, at least, has the best pronunciation.
“Oyasumi,” she says back.
Zanka hears coughing coming from outside of Rudo’s door when he approaches the outside. He wasn’t doing that before, but he realizes a little too late what’s actually happening once he opens the door again.
Zanka curses to himself and rushes over to his side, setting the gloves on the bed and snatching the trash bin on the floor up to underneath Rudo’s chin. He’s already thrown up some on the bed, but it seems like mostly on the blanket, and it shouldn’t be an issue to clean.
Rudo coughs and hacks painfully over the bin, not getting much up aside from spit and bits of stomach acid. Zanka tries not to pay too much attention to it, because he’s sort of nauseous himself for some reason, but he’s honestly more focused on how hard Rudo is breathing. He’s shaking a whole lot, wheezing and near hyperventilating.
Riyo does this when she’s sick. He doesn’t know why or where it comes from, he’s just come to understand that the act of throwing up seems to really freak her out, but she’s not really reactive to seeing another person vomit. This seems a little different, though.
Zanka rubs his back, carefully, but it doesn’t seem to improve. His eyes are totally unfocused. It's really difficult to see him like that. Zanka can’t think of anything to do that he knows will help. He knows most of what Rudo puts up for other people is an act, and he can't really fault him for it. He feels the same way, a lot of the time.
“It's okay,” Zanka tells him quietly, “‘ve got you, yeah?”
Hearing Zanka’s voice seems to pull him out of it some, and Zanka wonders if maybe he had a bad dream. He keeps talking to him for a few minutes, telling him it’s okay, breathe, relax, and eventually his breathing starts to steady a little bit. Zanka realizes that pill is probably long gone by now, and he’s not sure if Rudo could handle taking the other one he has left.
He’s relaxed enough that Zanka decides to put the bin back down on the floor and take the blanket off of the bed, in the corner for now. Rudo is still catching his breath, staring down at the bed, and Zanka realizes he’s using one hand to hold himself, and it’s probably the reason his whole body is shaking.
“Lay back down. I'll keep this here,” Zanka assures him, referring to the bin. He takes the gloves and hands them to Rudo, initially intending to help him put them on, but Rudo's eyes light up at the sight of them, and he's able to put them back on himself without too much of a struggle.
Once Rudo lies back down, he seems like he’s relaxed some now that he has his gloves back, but he’s shaking like he’s cold, despite how much he’s sweating. He’s thrown up, and as much as Zanka wants to believe it was from a nightmare, even if it was, he thinks his initial theory was wrong.
“Think you really are sick,” Zanka says, his hand flush against his forehead. His skin is really hot, now. Everything's pointing toward illness, at this point. The throwing up was just the nail in the coffin.
He takes the second washcloth from the bedside table to wet with the rest of the water bottle and lay over Rudo’s hot forehead, but he feels like the temperature adjusts pretty quickly. He should definitely go find Eishia once it’s an appropriate time to wake somebody up, but hopefully getting some good rest will help Rudo a little now that he’s got his gloves back on.
“Wake me up if y’feel sick again,” Zanka tells him, sitting down on the floor and crossing his arms over the edge of his mattress. Rudo doesn’t give any sign that he’s heard tim.
Finally, his eyes have closed, and his face has relaxed some.
“Rudo?”
Zanka starts, but there's no reply.
“Night, Rudo.”
Fuck. He has to get up in an hour.
“Zanka,” Enjin whispers carefully.
Zanka nearly jumps out of his skin at the sudden voice behind him, and it’s extra-scary realizing that it’s Enjin, of all people. He doesn’t feel like he fell asleep at all, more like he just closed his eyes for a few seconds. He pulls his arms off of the bed and nearly whimpers from how sore his body feels. Awful position to fall asleep in. What was he thinking?
Fuck, honestly, he feels like shit all around. His head is pounding.
“Wh'time'sit?” he manages, his eyes darting around the room. Enjin’s in full uniform, his hand on Umbreaker’s handle, staring down at Zanka.
“Eight,” Enjin tells him, and Zanka’s whole body tenses up painfully as soon as he realizes he’s completely late. He scrambles to stand up, using Rudo’s bed as leverage, but Enjin places a hand on his shoulder, “job's canceled today. Just came to tell you, but I couldn't find you.”
Zanka is honestly completely relieved to hear that, but his head is swimming so bad that he has to sit down on Rudo’s bed, or else he thinks he might pass out. Definitely not good. It feels sort of like the first few days that he was recovering from Jabber’s poison, and he’s worried about why that feeling would be coming back. He feels nauseous thinking about it.
His eyes drift over to Rudo, who looks peacefully asleep, for the most part - but still awfully sick. His skin’s nearly as pale as his hair.
“Y'think Eishia's awake?” Zanka asks. Rudo definitely needs to get looked at.
“I'm sure. I'll go get her,” Enjin says, “go get some sleep. I know you guys got back late yesterday. I'll look after Rudo.”
Zanka’s almost inclined to take the offer right away and hightail it, but something stops him. He doesn't like leaving anything unfinished, even something like this, in these circumstances.
“You okay?” Enjin asks. Zanka isn’t sure why.
“Sore,” Zanka says. He decides he doesn’t want to go into specifics about his theories because it’s already causing all sorts of anxiety. He tries stretching his arms out behind his head, and he’s realizing his neck hurts, too. He’s sore all over. He really overdid it yesterday, and he doesn’t feel like he did at all.
Enjin doesn't look convinced. He slides his hand underneath Zanka’s bangs and lays it against his forehead for a few seconds. Zanka stares blankly back at him.
“Mhm,” Enjin says with a click of his tongue as he takes his hand back.
Zanka’s brow furrows. “What?”
“Fever,” Enjin says.
Zanka groans. That can’t be right. “‘S probably ‘cause I didn't sleep.”
“Or, you're both sick,” Enjin tells him. “Go rest, I've got it.”
Oh.
That makes sense.
And he knows he can’t argue with Enjin.
“You look tired,” Riyo says.
Zanka’s mixing an immune support packet into his water bottle in the common area. Riyo’s not in uniform. She’s waiting on water to heat up so she can use it for coffee, he imagines. He stares down at the orange powder mixing in with his drink. He doesn’t want to believe he’s sick. He can’t decide if that’s better or worse than still recovering from the poison. If he really is sick, it means that stuff totally tanked his immune system.
He’s sure he’s just not feeling his best because of everything that’s been going on, and maybe the immune support will help stave anything off.
“You always say that,” Zanka huffs.
“Well, a little more than usual, then,” she insists. “Get back late?”
“Yeah. After midnight,” Zanka murmurs, staring down at the drink, not sure if he should give any more details. He feels like Riyo will already know everything, anyway.
“Right. And how's Rudo?”
Zanka turns his head and blinks at her. He didn’t think she’d actually know that. “What?”
“Weren't you taking care of him?” Riyo asks, like it’s obvious.
“How do you know that?” Zanka asks.
“My room's right over this. I could hear ya.”
“So you didn't sleep either, then,” Zanka says.
“At least I'm a morning person, so I hide it better,” she teases.
“Could’a used your help,” Zanka grumbles, taking several sips of the drink he’s mixed. The artificial citrus sort of burns, and after a few seconds, he realizes it’s making his stomach hurt. Maybe he should have had tea first. Or actual food. This probably isn’t good first thing in the morning.
“Oh, yeah, my friend Zanka, who always accepts when I offer him help,” Riyo says as sarcastically as humanly possible, and Zanka rolls his eyes. He's not that bad, but maybe she's a little bit right. Just for this situation specifically.
“Zanka.”
Enjin’s voice again. They both turn and see Enjin standing behind them, and he taps the end of Umbreaker against the floor twice.
Zanka blinks in Enjin's direction, but he’s frozen in place otherwise.
“Go to bed.”
“Did someone tell him it's nine in the morning?” Riyo whispers in Zanka’s direction, teasing.
“Feel his forehead,” Enjin says.
“Ohh. You're in trouble,” Riyo says, reaching forward to press her hand up to Zanka's forehead, and succeeding despite Zanka's attempts to lean away from her. She clicks her tongue and ge groans. “So, Rudo got you sick that fast?”
“My guess is he was sore all day yesterday and didn't realize it was a fever,” Enjin says. Zanka huffs. He sees right through him every time. “Go to bed. I’ll send Eishia your way later.”
“Fine,” Zanka mumbles. He really hates being forced to rest when he doesn’t think he’s particularly ill, but the nauseous feeling in the back of his throat is probably a warning that he should listen.
“Thanks for takin’ care of him, Zanka,” Enjin says as Zanka starts to turn away with his water bottle, “y’did a good job.”
He’s glad Enjin thinks so.
That evening, Zanka decides to skip dinner with the crew. He'd been resting most of the day like he was ordered to, and he honestly does feel better. He managed to sleep through that awful nauseous feeling and avoid throwing up, but he’s still a little too nervous about it to eat. The fever is definitely there. The headache is mild, and isn’t turning into a migraine as far as he can tell. He's still crazy tired, but he usually is.
Riyo talked to him through the door for a while, too. She says Enjin is trying to avoid this spreading through the whole building, but Zanka’s already passed it to Semiu and Enjin, probably, and he saw Riyo this morning, too. At least it seems like a quick twenty-four hour thing.
Zanka wanders out of his room to refill his water bottle, and he finds Rudo in the common area, doing the same thing.
He looks a lot better, for sure. The color’s back in his face, but he’s still dead tired too, apparently. Someone’s stuck a cooling patch on his forehead.
“You good?” Zanka asks him.
Rudo looks at him, and then averts his gaze. “Yeah.”
“Okay, good.”
“I'm…sorry,” he murmurs. Zanka hopes that Enjin didn't tell him that they probably have the same thing. He fixes his hair in case he looks disheveled from practically sleeping all day.
“Nothin’ to be sorry for,” Zanka insists, as casually as he can, just in case Rudo would prefer they drop this.
“No, but…I…” Rudo murmurs, clearly wanting to have a conversation about it. Zanka decides he should listen and not shut him down if it means something to him, even if Zanka didn't mind at all.
Zanka sits down on a chair across from the couch, making sure Rudo understands that he's here to listen to him, that he doesn't need to rush to put his jumbled thoughts in order.
It's something he's seen Enjin do, especially when Zanka first joined the Cleaners. His anxiety was completely uncontrolled back then, and he felt as if he had to overcompensate and impress and explain himself for every little thing constantly - and even though he's sure it was beyond annoying, Enjin took the time to sit down and listen to him and let him get his brain straight on.
Sure, he didn’t have any younger siblings, no practice taking care of people younger than him, but Rudo deserves to have someone looking after him. He deserves to have people who will listen to him.
Zanka never really had that.
“My…um, Regto. The guy who -”
“I remember,” Zanka reminds him.
Rudo sits down on the couch across from him, his eyes at the floor, twisting and untwisting the cap of his water bottle while he talks.
“He was the only person who ever took care of me,” Rudo murmurs quietly, and it takes him several seconds to get that sentence out. Zanka can see that he's trying very hard to keep himself together. “So, I…I just kept seeing him, and…”
Zanka sees that he has really good memories attached to this man. He feels guilty. He knows what it’s like to have your surroundings changed suddenly and only be around strangers for a while, but Zanka didn’t have anyone who genuinely took care of him at home. Rudo has people he misses. People he can’t ever get back, even if he got back to the Sphere.
“That's why you were cryin’?” Zanka asks.
Rudo nods.
“Sorry, it’s…embarassing, kinda…”
“Don’t worry about any of that,” Zanka tells him. “Can’t imagine how hard all this is for you.”
Rudo’s eyes shift up to Zanka’s for a few seconds, and he realizes he’s holding back tears before he looks back down. Dammit, maybe he shouldn’t have said that. He’s terrible at this.
Zanka stands up to sit next to him.
The tears fall from his eyes, and Rudo tries to dry them with his gloves. Zanka rubs his shoulder, because even if Rudo still seems to have a mild fever making all of this a little worse, these are his real feelings.
“Thanks, Zanka,” he murmurs after a while. Zanka isn’t sure if it’s just a thanks of that moment, or everything from the previous night.
He’s not sure he deserves the thanks, but he’s glad it meant something to Rudo.
Zanka just nods.