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It was the Batfamily’s monthly D&D session that typically ran for 6 hours straight. Barbra was always the DM as when they began this tradition she knew the most about the game, and let’s be honest she was the best at it. However Barbra decided to make Tim be DM as she wanted to play a character she had made. Tim had excitedly accepted and told them that we would have it ready in a week.
So here they were, at the costume made D&D table Bruce had gotten when they started playing. Tim sat at the head of the table with an evil smirk on his face. To his left sat Barbra, Cass, Jason, and Duke. To his right sat Bruce, Damien, Dick, and Steph. Alfred didn’t play saying he preferred watching them play.
“Alright everyone, go ahead and introduce the character you are playing.” Tim gestured to Bruce. “B, you start.”
“I’m playing a human fighter rogue multiclass.” Bruce said calmly.
“Human ranger.” Damien said shortly.
“Half-elf bard!” Dick said. The rest of the table groaned.
“You always play bard.” Jason grumbled.
“Like you are any better Mr.Barbarian gunslinger.” Dick pointed out.
Jason looked down at his charactersheet. “Firbolg barbarian gunslinger, thank you very much.”
“Well I’m playing an Elf sorcerer.” Steph jumped in.
“Dwarf artificer with a merchant background.” Barbra said, an evil look that matched Tim’s was on her face.
“Changeling cleric, trickery domain.” Cass said.
“You already know mine.” Jason grumbled shooting Dick a pointed look.
“Uh, I’m a blue dragonborn paladin, oath of devotion.” Duke spoke.
Tim clapped his hands together, smirk growing wider. “Well, I’m glad we got all that out of the way! With that let’s begin.” Tim adjusts the DM screen, before speaking. “You find yourself in a large cavern. The cave walls rise high, and the floor drops off into bottomless pits in places. The drip of water running down the stoney walls can be quietly heard.”
“‘Ain’t these supposed to start in a tavern or something like that.” Jason interrupted.
Tim rolls a dice. “Jason take 4 points of damage for interrupting.”
“What! He can’t do that!” Jason turns to Barbra. “Can he do that?”
She nods, which causes Jason to let out a string of curses before marking the damage down on his paper.
“Wait a fucking second.” Steph speaks up before Tim can start again. “Are we in the batcave?!”
“Wait, she’s right!” Dick exclaims.
“I know.” Steph says, puffing out her chest. Damien simply shakes his head but doesn’t say anything.
“Why are we in the batcave?” Duke quietly asks. He’s played D&D many times with his friends but this is his first campaign with his family, and he’s slightly terrified.
“It’s not the batcave.” Tim grumbles.
“I’m pretty sure it’s the batcave.” Jason stage whispers to Cass, who lets out a huff of air.
“Jason Todd-Wayne, I will roll another dice of damage.” Tim shoots Jason a glare.
“Hey! What did I do, she started it!” He points to Steph, who squawks in offense. No one comments on the fact Jason didn’t correct Tim, when he said Wayne.
Tim looks at Jason with the same expression he uses when working on brutal murder cases. “Consider this payback for punching me every session.” Tim says, referring to the fact Jason would roll to punch Tim every session when Babs would DM. The only reason Jason didn’t hurt him more is because Babs had limited Jason to one party-on-party, violent action per session.
The look on Jason’s face is one of betrayal and maybe a little bit of respect under it. He scoffs before looking away.
“Now can I continue?” Tim asks the table.
Everyone nods or gives a word of agreement.
“Good. In the center of the cavern is a chest, it sits on top of a rather tall rock. What do you want to do?” Tim grins.
“I cast detect magic on the chest and surrounding area.” Duke speaks up. Which causes everyone at the table to whip their heads around to look at him. “What?”
“I think that is the first time I have ever seen someone at this table make a smart decision right off the bat, excluding Tim.” Babs explains the shock on everyone’s face.
“How the hell do you guys play this game?!” Duke yelps.
“I was going to suggest we get Todd to pick it up in case it’s cursed and attacks someone.” Damien explains, ignoring Jason’s protests.
“Yes. That is a good idea.” Cass adds.
“Not you too, Cass!” Jason looks at his sister. “You’re supposed to be the nice one!”
Dick laughs at his brother, which causes said brother (Jason) to growl at him.
“Duke.” The table’s attention returns to Tim. “You get a strong feeling of magic coming from the chest on the rock. Do you wish to share this with the party?”
Duke thinks for a moment, then grins. “Nope!” He pops the ‘p’.
Tim grins an equally evil grin back. “Alright, Duke is the only one who knows about the magical energy coming from the chest. Does anyone else want to do anything?”
“I say we send Bruce to do it since Jason seems so against it.” Steph declares. “Can I push Bruce towards the rock?” Tim nods, Steph smiles. “Alright then, I push Bruce towards the rock.”
Tim gestures for Bruce to respond. “Hmm, I guess I’d like to roll for investigation on the chest.” Bruce picks up a D20 rolling it, he then grimaces. “8.”
“8? Don’t you have like a plus 4 on investigation!” Dick looks at his father, who shrugs.
“Well it looks like a pretty normal chest, you have no suspicion of it.” Tim explains.
“Father, I do not believe touching the practically placed chest, that seems like a bad idea.” Damien speaks with a serious look on his face.
“Come on it can’t be that bad, baby bat” Dick grins. “Tim, I push Bruce out of the way and open the chest.”
“No!” “Why would you do that?” “Sigh” Come from the opposite side of the table to Dick.
“Dick you open the chest, it’s a chest filled with gold, and sitting on it is a large red jewel.” Tim seemingly flips a page of his notes, and scribbles something down, but the DM screen blocks it from view.
“See, I told you.” Dick boasts poking Damien’s cheek who promptly tries to bite Dick, of which the older bat dodges.
Duke looks down at his paper for a long moment before turning to Babs. “Hey Babs, do you have pliers on you?”
Babs glances at her sheet to double check. “Yeah, do you want them?” Duke nods. “Alright, I walk over to Duke and hand him my pliers.”
“Can I shoot the chest?” Jason suddenly asks.
“Is it not already open?” Cass asks.
“It is.” Tim answers.
“Then why?” Cass tilts her head to the side, staring at Jason for a few moments before looking down at her sheet. “Tim, I have 60 feet of movement may I use them to get as far away from the chest as possible?”
“Of course. You head about 60 ft away from the chest, it’s a dark cave but you have darkvision so you can still see the party relatively well.” Tim frowns briefly before, scribbling something on his paper. “Okay, um well Jason you can shoot the chest? But I do want you to roll to see if you hit the chest or Dick.”
Dick yells “what”, at the same time that Jason says”bet.” Jason rolls his red D20 because every dice this guy owns is red. “16! Damn, I don’t think I hit dick with that.” “Why do you want to hit me!” Yells Dick.
“You would be correct, it hits the chest, specifically the jewel that sits upon the gold. Everyone roll for initiative.” Tim flips more pages, and then starts rolling what sounds like 8 dice.
“JASON.” The entire table, save Cass, Tim, and Damian yell.
“Oops? Anyway I rolled a 14 for initiative.” Jason shrugs, not caring that he possibly just sent them all to their deaths.
The rest of the table rolls. “Alright the initiative order, for you guys at least, goes as follows; Babs with a 22, Duke 19, Cass 18, Steph 18 but I like Cass more””HEY” yelled Steph, Tim ignored her. “Jason 14, Damian 12, and-.” He paused. “Bruce how the hell did you get a negative 4.”
“I do not know.” Bruce shrugs.
Tim blinks a few times and turns to Babs. “What do I do?”
She shrugs. “It’s up to you. You’re the DM now.”
Tim blinks again before smiling and sitting back, a warm feeling in his chest. “Well anyway, let’s begin this fight.”
4 hours later, a nearly dead Jason (Jason had yelled “Goddamit I already died once in real life don’t kill me in another explosion”), Dick pulling out a guitar from god knows where, and having both Steph and Duke nearly kill each other. Cass had refused to heal anyone, in fact she had sat and watched for the first half of the battle before coming in and kicking ass. But they had finished the session, and everyone but Tim and Babs filed out.
“You know, you’re a really good DM Tim. You have great storytelling, and make the game engaging to everyone’s play styles. There isn’t anyone else who could have done a better job, I’m happy I passed it down to you.” Babs said, with a smile on her face.
Tim stared at her for a moment before hugging her. “Thank you Babs. I couldn’t have had a better mentor. Could we maybe start planning out the next session, I know it would kinda wreck it for you. But I really want your input-”
“I’d love too, Tim,” Babs interrupted his rambling.
Tim stared at her for another moment before his face broke out into a large grin. “Good, because I have the most evil ideas, but I don’t know exactly how to pull them off.”
Outside the game room the rest of the players looked at each other with horror.
“Who let Tim be the DM?” Jason asks. “We have made an evil monster, I don’t think I’m going to come out of the campaign alive.”
“Like your character..?” Duke asked, though he knew he probably already had the answer.
“No,” Jason turns to look at Duke. “I think I might actually die.”
“No one is going to die.” Bruce grumbled.
“Are you sure? Because little wing is right, I think we created a monster.” Dick spoke.
“Tim and Babs are planning.” Cass suddenly announced.
“Shit.” “Fuck.” “Is it too late to quit?” “Why did I join this family?” “Duke?” “You heard nothing.” Voices overlapped coming from the terrified players.
“Tim is my best friend, I know him, and I know he is about to make the most soul-crushing, spirit-striking, emotionally-taxing, campaign ever. So, to restate what Jason said. Who let Tim be the DM?”
“Me.” A voice from behind the group, they turned to see Babs rolling her chair to them. “And I made the best decision, Steph is right, we have created a monster, but I think I like this monster.”
No one else could find it within themselves to argue against Babs. She was right, they had made a monster, making Tim DM, but he was going to have fun. And they knew that Tim needed that fun after the year he spent around the world, nearly dying way too many times. Plus it’s really a batfamily activity if someone doesn’t;
Get shot
Nearly die
Emotionally traumatised for life
All of the above plus a list of like 56 more things.
Plus what’s the worst Tim could truly do? I mean it’s not like he’ll inflict the fear of god into all of them. Make them start to doubt themselves, and each other. And make everyone believe there is a mole in the party, when there isn’t, just for there to actually be one. Right?
Right?