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Robert was known for his big gestures and even bigger words. He loved giving gifts and uttering sweet love confessions, since it were the things that made his husband very happy.
It didn't even need to be a birthday or an anniversary, Robert sometimes came home with a new shirt for Aaron or a decorative plant for their new, not so new anymore, home.
Robert also had his way with words, having been a salesman for years, he knew how to be persuasive. But more that the seductive words to get Aaron in bed, Aaron loved his words of comfort and devotion when life got a bit rough on him.
Robert wasn't the only one who could give comfort, Aaron could too. He found out his talents one night when Robert had come back from a three-day business trip, complaining about the god-awful quality of the bed. His neck had been jammed and every time he had tried to move it, it had hurt.
Aaron had dragged him up the stairs and used his hands to work out the strained muscles in his back. By the end of it, Robert had been like putty in his hands, pliant and satisfied.
Robert had tried to return the favour, but somehow he always pushed too hard or too soft or not in the right spot. He just didn't have massaging skills, but he knew how to destress Aaron in multiple other, effective ways.
Unfortunately over the course of the past weeks, Robert had done nothing other than stressing him out. The faucet in the kitchen was leaking and making a mess out of their kitchen floor. Robert said he was going to call a plumber to fix it, but then when Aaron – growing impatient – asked him three days later, he had forgotten to call.
Aaron had tried to keep calm, he really did. But he just couldn't understand how you could forget, when you wake up every morning with your kitchen floor as one big puddle. Robert had partially defused his anger by actually calling the plumbing agency, but fuelled Aaron's anger again by informing him the plumber couldn't come until next week.
Liv had also been acting up in school, her grades were terrible and there was a parent-teacher counselling. Aaron was already upset Robert couldn't come with him to give moral support, since he had a meeting, but he felt absolutely terrible when Liv's homeroom teacher gave him a stern lecture that he wasn’t raising Liv properly.
She had no right, and Robert even less when he started arguing with him that Liv’s teacher may have been a little bit right.
The last drop that made the cup overflow was his sudden workload pile-up. Robert was only suggesting he could do some hours at the scrapyard, but Aaron interpreted it differently. “You’re saying I’m terrible at my job as well as raising Liv?”
Robert did a double take and shook his head, “Where did this come from? Aaron…” He reached out for his husband, but the brunette shoved him away.
“Don’t ‘Aaron’ me, with that look in your eyes.” Aaron spoke annoyed, walking upstairs, Robert not far behind.
Aaron grabbed a bag out of one of the cabinets of the wardrobe and started loading some clothes in there.
“What are you doing!” Robert shouted and gripped his arms to stop Aaron from running away.
With a sigh Aaron explained, “Rob, I can’t be here. I’m stressed out and to be honest, right now I’m tired of seeing your face 24/7.” He tried to ignore Robert’s dejected look, but he couldn’t stop feeling bad after he said it. He pulled out of his grasp and caressed Robert’s cheek. “I’m sorry, I just… I don’t know.” He was still too irritated to begin to fully apologize.
He just needed to get a few days off, something he hadn’t been able to do for months. Ever since their honeymoon they’d been working nonstop and Aaron desperately needed a break.
“Where are you going then?” Robert asked after he realized he wouldn’t be able to convince Aaron to stay.
The brunette shrugged while replying, “The pub. It’s only for a few days. I’ll be back before you know it.” Normally when Aaron would be leaving for a while, he’d stand on his tippy toes to peck Robert’s cheek or mouth. Robert had been waiting for it, but Aaron left without kissing him.
Aaron hadn’t expected to get a call or text from Robert the first or second night, but it had been five days. The least Robert could’ve done was pop round the pub. It wasn’t like he was the number one enemy in the village, now that Aaron had temporarily moved back in the pub.
Chas had been worried when he had showed up, bag in his hand and a terrible frown on his face. Aaron hadn’t wanted to talk to anyone, but he had known crazy rumours would’ve started to spread around if he hadn’t told her something.
“We’re not fighting. I just needed some time to unwind.” Aaron had confessed, not expecting his mum to laugh as much as she did.
“I was wondering when it would end.” Her eyes had twinkled in amusement, agitating Aaron endlessly.
He had replied defensively, “What do you mean?” He had just told her they hadn’t broken up.
“That honeymoon period you were in. You’ve finally taken those rose-coloured glasses off.” Chas had told him.
“But I really do love him.” Aaron had muttered to himself, forgetting his mum was even in the room. There had been nothing else to do except going upstairs and trying to shut the rest of the world out.
Whatever Aaron had expected to achieve with his days of solitude, it wasn’t working. He felt even more tired and stressed on his own. Without Robert he couldn’t sleep at night.
He came back from the scrapyard and ordered a pint from his mum. He slumped down and checked his phone even though he wouldn’t have any messages.
“Any word from Robert?” Chas asked, hiding a knowing smile behind her hand.
Aaron exhaled deeply and pocketed his phone again, “No, I think he might be cross with me.” He twiddled with his fingers and took a gulp from his pint.
“You needed time. He can’t be angry with you because of that.” Chas insisted.
Aaron’s teeth sunk into his lower lip and he sighed, “I know I’ve said I needed time on my own, but I feel worse without him.” He lowered his gaze, “I really miss him.”
Tracy walked up to the bar, asking for a refill, diverting Chas’ attention, but before she tended to the blonde woman, she called out to Aaron, “By the way, Robert’s been up your room earlier and left something there for you.”
Aaron didn’t know whether he should thank her or be annoyed with her for not telling him the second he walked in. It had probably been her plan from the start to get him talking about his feelings.
Aaron downed the last of his pint and went upstairs, two steps at a time. He opened his bedroom door and his heart nearly melted. On the middle of his bed lay his scrapbook. Robert had pinned a note to the front.
‘Don’t worry I haven’t read it. Robert xx’ Aaron felt his heart swell at the cute note. He was however going to kill Robert if he lied to him and really did read it.
He plopped down on the bed and lay comfortably against the pillows. He opened the first page, ‘Aaron’s Scrapbook’ written in big bold letters above a picture of them at their wedding.
It was the one Victoria had taken of them. They were both smiling widely, since they had annoyed her by obviously forcing their smiles on the pictures before that. When she had taken this picture, they had both been on the edge of hysterics due to Vic’s angry pout and her stomping on the floor with her heels.
Aaron gently stroked his index finger over Robert’s figure in the picture. He had looked better than he ever had, but it was especially the smile he hadn’t been able to fight off the entire day that had made him so irresistible.
He flipped to the next page and rolled his eyes with a grin. Back when he first received the gift, he and Robert had agreed that it was Aaron’s gift, so Robert would never write or read in it. They’d even made up some ridiculous rules, that were extensively written out.
‘Robert Jacob Sugden, husband of Aaron Dingle, is under no circumstances allowed to write, read or even open this scrapbook. (Even if he’s really tempted and no one’s home.) If he doesn’t manage to keep his hands off and his curiosity under control, Aaron Dingle, husband of Robert J. Sugden, is allowed to punish him as he wishes. (No sexy punishments, that’s cheating.) The aforementioned Mr. Dingle will promise to only write the truth and nothing but the truth. (even if that means writing complaints about Robert J. Sugden.)
Under it were both of their signatures. Robert’s was signed with his typical flourish, Aaron’s was kept simple. It was the only page Robert had been allowed to read and write on. After that Aaron had kept Robert a safe distance away from his scrapbook.
While Aaron had been writing in it late at night, during which Robert had been reading a book in bed, he’d sometimes seen Robert peeping over the top of his book and Aaron always had to press his book to his chest in order for Robert to get the message. It was private.
The next page was one that had Aaron cringing at himself.
‘Two weeks after the wedding. It still feels very new and yet… also like we’ve been doing this for ages. It’s just so natural, but I guess that’s normal when you marry your soulmate. I can still barely believe Rob called me his soulmate in his vows. What had he been thinking? Though Liv had mentioned she had helped Rob create his vows. I need to check what she meant by saying that.’
A bit below his text Aaron had written a short PS: ‘Well, at least Liv received good grades on that assignment.’
He read all the little texts he had written about Robert; when Robert had forgotten Chas’ birthday and was freaking out because of it or when he had cooked supper for them and Liv, but he had prepared way too much and they turned it into a big Dingle-Sugden dinner.
And then there were also parts like this: ‘Fuck, I’m still damn sore. We shouldn’t have had sex last night. I knew Rob was tired, but still he managed to convince me, like usual. Damn, how the hell did he fall asleep inside and on top of me though?’
Aaron grabbed a pillow and covered his face with it. He even bit in the fabric to hold in the shriek at the next part, where he had explicitly written what he was going to do to Robert their next time. “Christ.” He groaned and his eyes widened at how inventive and creative he’d been.
The worst part of it all was that he didn’t even remember when he had written it. There were sometimes pages filled with endless love confessions simply because Aaron had access to his scrapbook even while drunk.
‘… make him scream until he’s heard all over Yorkshire.’
Aaron let out a strangled cry as he pressed his face in the pillows, beyond embarrassed.
His scrapbook wasn’t nearly completely written in, but Aaron spent a few hours reading in it, laughing at some parts, feeling foolish and childish at others and eventually he was there: at an empty page.
He didn’t have inspiration to write now, and just drew a doodles on the page. Robert would be scolding him for wasting papers, but it was his scrapbook and he could do with it whatever he wanted.
Soon his entire page was filled with lines and stripes and dots and Aaron turned the page only to find it already written on. No, it wasn’t exactly written on, it had a paper glued to it.
‘My dear Aaron,
As you know by now, sometimes I lie. According to our rules on page one of this book, I’m not allowed to write in your scrapbook, so that’s why I glued this paper in. Also, I didn’t read your stuff, I just needed to find a blank page, so I just skimmed through.
You know how I am, I always manage to sneak my way in. You may have to punish me for opening your book, but I’m sure you’ll think of a way ;)
Can you blame me for being curious? I’m pretty sure, if you’d give me a scrapbook and I’d be constantly writing in it about you, you’d be damn curious too. But that’s not the point…
The point is… I really, really miss you and this was the only real thing I had of you. So I could hear your thoughts, imagine your voice when you say those things and trust me… you’re as infatuated with me as I am with you.
The plumber came, that’s one problem solved and Liv’s sorted, kind of, she threw her schoolbooks at me when I tried to talk to her, but we’re fine now. We sat down like adults and didn’t shout at each other (much).
So… what I’m trying to put across to you, which is quite difficult without actually being able to gauge your reaction, is that I want you to come home. Desperately. I may seem like I have everything under control but I’m a mess without you and I need you.’
Aaron stormed down the stairs with his scrapbook in his hands, not even packing his bag again as he took off to their home. He constantly had the same things on his mind. Firstly, he now knew this had been exactly what he needed to hear. Secondly, he could barely believe Robert had the gift of transforming the smallest gestures into big love declarations. He just didn’t know how his husband managed to do it. Was it something he did deliberately or did it flow naturally?
And lastly, he was going to strangle Robert for reading his scrapbook.
‘… you’re as infatuated with me as I am with you.’ Aaron had recognized the reference to one of his texts immediately. Sometimes Aaron’s insecurities got the better of him and now, instead of doing some stupid things like getting jealous and breaking in, he now wrote it all in his book, knowing that he could get rid of those nasty feelings by writing them down.
‘I feel so utterly and stupidly in love with him, like I’m ten feet high. He makes me float and sometimes I just can’t help but wonder, does he feel the same? Is he as infatuated with me as I am with him?’
Had Robert really expected to get away with the excuse he “just skimmed through”? He obviously read the entire thing.