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Both Chris' school and Theo's daycare were holding bake sales for- well, whatever bake sales were for. Eddie wasn't listening to that part.
However, Eddie was thrilled because it meant Buck would be baking and he would get all of the items deemed as "failures."
"Mix." Buck demanded, thrusting a bowl of egg yolks into Eddie's formerly unoccupied hands.
Eddie watched as his husband turned back to the cupcake frosting, whisking it with unnecessary force, Buck's eyebrows pinched tightly together and his jaw set firmly in determination.
They were no stranger to bake sales, in fact Eddie would claim that they were quite familiar with them.
Buck had a running grudge against the PTA moms at Chris' school ever since finding out they've been selling store-bought goods at the annual bake sales. And, from the moment onward, Buck had what he called a "friendly competition" with them to see who could sell more.
Unsurprisingly, Buck always sold more.
This year was a struggle though, they had two bake sales to go to and Buck refused to make the same treat twice.
On top of that, Theo's daycare had a theme.
"What kind of bake sale has a theme?" Buck scoffed, punching in the numbers to preheat the oven. "And I doubt half of these kids have even watched Sesame Street! I mean, c'mon, does Chris even know what it is?"
Eddie shook his head. "It drove Shannon crazy, so she made me promise to never play it in the house."
"Exactly!" Buck exclaimed, motioning toward Eddie as he spoke. "This is stupid."
Despite claiming it was stupid, Buck had spent the last half hour painstakingly making mini chocolate chip cookies for the Cookie Monster cupcakes.
Buck took the bowl of now mixed eggs from Eddie, pouring them in with the rest of the ingredients for the cupcakes.
"Denny watched Sesame Street all the time when he was little." Hen commented, grabbing a cookie from the counter and popping it into her mouth.
Eddie swore he saw Buck's blood pressure rise. "You put that back." He chided through tightly gritted teeth.
Hen scoffed. "Yeah, I'm sure the daycare wants a half eaten cookie, Buckaroo."
Eddie pointed toward the pile of cookies that had been exiled from the rest of the goods, "That's up for grabs." He explained, snagging a cookie that didn't earn him a death glare from Buck.
"Oh, so you're profiling cookies? That's not very inclusive of you, Buckley." Chim snorted.
"Buckley-Diaz, Han." Buck corrected, loosening his white-knuckle grip of the mixing bowl.
"Oh right, my mistake."
"Y'know it's not a competition, right?" Hen asked. "You can't win a bake sale."
Eddie nearly choked on his coffee, "I wouldn't say that if I were you."
"They use store-bought baked goods and-..." The blonde cut himself off, turning away from the crew as the oven timer beeped, signalling it was done pre-heating.
"And what?" Eddie asked, handing Buck the pan of coffee cake (for Chris' bake sale) to put in with the cupcakes.
Buck bit his bottom lip, worrying the flesh between his teeth as he put the cupcake tin and the cake pan into the oven. "It's nothing."
"Clearly it's not nothing if you're acting like you're going to war." Hen observed.
Eddie watched as his husband shrugged, starting to clean up the kitchen as a way to avoid answering.
He frowned, joining Buck by the sink to help dry the dishes. "What did they say?"
"They said if Theo had a motherly presence in his life then he wouldn't act so... Wild." Buck mumbled.
"But he did have a mom, up until a few months ago at least. Don't they know that?"
"They think he's gotten worse." Buck admitted, tears welling in his eyes. "Am I doing a bad job at parenting him?" He asked, turning to look at Eddie with the saddest blue eyes known to man.
"Hey, no." Eddie assured him, putting his hand on Buck's shoulder and giving it a gentle squeeze. "We're a team, yeah? So, if one of us is doing a bad job, then both of us are."
"You're a great parent, just look at Chris."
"I had help."
"I just-" Buck sighed, resting his head on top of Eddie's as they stood side by side. "I can't help but wonder what Conner and Kameron would think."
"There's no way to know, but we're doing our best."
And that's how Eddie officially got on board with "Plan Destroy PTA."
There was a similar plan a few years back when Chris had just started high school, Buck- the very nosy PTA parent- overheard some ableist comments and proceeded to make a fool of those parents in every fundraiser event the school offered.
Kim and Martha are no longer a part of the PTA.
Eddie helped set up the table at the bake sale and this time he didn't sneak any of the food off of the table before the event started.
Although he really would've loved to have just one cupcake.
Instead, he went around telling everyone about the amazing cupcakes at table B7 before he left to help out at Chris' school.
"You really didn't have to do that." Buck pouted, looking at Eddie through his lashes as he walked over to say his goodbye.
"And let my husband's hard work go unnoticed? I think not." Eddie said, pressing a kiss to Buck's birthmark. "Now, kick their asses."
Buck pulled him into a quick kiss, "Good luck at Chris' bake sale, the moms there are vicious."
"I think I can handle myself, but thanks."
Famous last words...
The moms passed by Eddie, looking down on him despite him being taller.
They could sense weakness.
Eddie wasn't worried about Buck's coffee cake not selling, but he was worried about the looks he was getting.
It was like these women were prepared to fight to the death for customers.
One mom- Eddie once thought her name was Carrie, but wasn't sure- stopped in front of his booth.
"You're alone." She noticed the lack of the six foot two himbo almost immediately. "Shame."
"What's that supposed to mean?" He snapped, glaring at her.
"Nothing." She answered, pretentiously. "Just remember to smile."
Buck usually did the socializing at these events, so Eddie never had to worry before.
Everyone gravitated toward Buck, he was a magnetic ball of sunshine.
Eddie just hoped all of the comments- mainly from Buck- about him having a pretty face would save him from his terrible social skills.
"I'll try." He said, forcing a snide smile.
He kept that smile for the entire event, making little bits of small talk whenever someone would ask about the cake.
"Oh, coffee cake? How'd you come up with that idea?" Was the most asked question.
His smile would become more genuine at that, he got to talk about Buck. "Actually, it was my husband's. He made the cake."
Some people, typically people who knew Eddie and knew he could barely cook and absolutely couldn't bake, let out a sigh of relief when he said that.
Despite his social awkwardness, Eddie managed to sell most of the cake and earn a fair bit of money for the high school's fundraiser.
Anything that didn't sell was just another thing he got to eat when it was over.
Well, he and Chris and Theo got to eat.
But either way, sold or not, was a win.
Just as the event was wrapping up, Eddie's phone buzzed.
It was a text from Buck.
Buck: won the bake sale
Eddie laughed and rolled his eyes fondly.
He had no doubt that Buck would sell the most, considering he was all charming and a master baker.
Eddie: I knew you could do it.