Archive of Our Own

Eddie woke up already annoyed.

It didn’t happen often. Not since he and Buck had made things official. More often than not, Eddie woke with Buck’s arms wrapped around him, warm and cozy and safe. Buck would always, always, press a soft kiss to the back of Eddie’s neck. He’s not one hundred percent sure, but he’s pretty certain that sweet little neck kiss is what sets his day on the right track.

Anyway, Eddie went to bed annoyed last night. His mother had called him as he and Buck were getting ready to go to bed and it was basically just her chewing him out for not visiting. Like he didn’t have a full time job and a kid and entire life in Los Angeles. Like his parents weren’t retired and could travel to LA to see him and Chris whenever they wanted.

Whatever.

So Eddie had gone to bed annoyed and then he woke up annoyed because the bed was empty.

Buck was gone. No arms around him. No neck kiss.

Just cold sheets and an irritation growing in his chest.

Sighing, Eddie sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He swung his feet off of the mattress and stood, slipping one of Buck’s hoodies over his head.

He walked out of their bedroom and down the hall, rounding the corner into the kitchen. Buck stood in front of the coffee maker, scooping coffee grounds into the filter.

“I woke up to a cold bed,” Eddie said, standing behind Buck with his arms crossed. “You know I don’t like waking up to a cold bed.”

Buck glanced over his shoulder at him. A soft smile crossed his face. “Sorry, baby. I couldn’t sleep. Got up, like, two hours ago.”

A little bit of the irritation in Eddie’s chest melted away. He wrapped his arms around Buck’s waist and hooked his chin over his shoulder. “I forgive you. But only this time. Don’t do it again.”

Letting out a breath through his nose, Buck nodded. “Sir, yes sir. Won’t happen again, sergeant.”

Eddie pressed his lips to the side of Buck’s neck. “I didn’t get my kiss.”

“God, you’ve such a diva,” Buck laughed. He poured the water into the coffee maker and switched it on before turning in Eddie’s arms. Buck looked down at him with a gentle expression, bright eyes, a smile tugging at his lips. “Good morning, baby.”

Buck leaned in and kissed Eddie’s mouth, slow and syrupy sweet, before pulling back, only leaving an inch between them.

“Better now?” he whispered.

Eddie hummed. “Better.”

“I was thinking I’d make pancakes.”

“With blueberries?”

“They’re your favorite. Of course I’d make them with blueberries. I was also thinking–”

The coffee pot started gurgling behind them. Something sounded…wrong.

“...Buck?” Eddie asked, cutting him off and looking up at him.

“Yes?”

“Did you put the pot back under the coffee maker after you poured the water?”

“Um.” Buck turned his head, looking behind him. “No. It appears I did not.”

Eddie leaned around him. Coffee was pouring straight into the space where the glass pot should have been, right onto the warming plate, over the edge of the counter, and onto the floor.

“Shit,” Eddie hissed, lunging around Buck and flipping the maker off. The flow of coffee slowly petered out, but the mess was already made.

“I am so sorry,” Buck murmured, grabbing the washcloth from the sink. He started wiping the counter. “Guess I’m a little scatter brained this morning.”

Eddie grabbed the roll of paper towel and ripped a few squares off. “It’s okay,” he reassured, “it happens. I’ll clean this up if you want to start making the pancakes.”

“You sure? I mean, it’s my fault. My mess.”

“This is our house, honey. Your mess is my mess.”

Buck chuckled. “That is…oddly romantic.” He tossed the washcloth back into the sink and started gathering ingredients for the pancakes. “Did you sleep okay?”

Eddie knelt down on the floor, wiping the puddle of coffee with a paper towel. “Mostly. Had some weird dreams.”

“Yeah?” Buck crossed the kitchen to the fridge. He took the blueberries out. “Like what?”

“Like Bobby and Athena asking me if they could adopt me and Christopher so they could claim us as dependents on their taxes.”

Buck laughed, making his way back towards the island. “What the hell do you think that means?”

Eddie shrugged, ripping off another piece of paper towel. “I couldn’t even begin to imagine. Not sure I really want to know.”

“You know, a few years ago, I went on this deep dive about the meaning of dreams and why we have them, so that probably means–oh shit!”

The package of blueberries slid out of Buck’s hands, landing in the puddle of coffee Eddie was still trying to mop up. Droplets of coffee splattered across Eddie’s clothes. Blueberries rolled across the floor like little marbles.

Eddie stilled. His eyes slipped shut.

For a moment, the kitchen was deathly silent.

Then, Buck said, “whoops.”

Opening his eyes, Eddie looked up at Buck from where he was still kneeling on the floor.

“Breakfast, two. Buck, zero,” he teased.

“I’m sorry,” Buck murmured, bending at the waist to start picking up the scattered blueberries. “Not sure what my deal is this morning.”

“Maybe the fact that you’ve been awake since 4:30?” Eddie muttered, feeling the irritation grow in his chest. He wasn’t irritated with Buck, necessarily, just irritated overall.

Buck let out a sheepish chuckle. “Yeah, maybe. I probably should’ve tried to sleep a little bit longer.” He dropped a handful of blueberries back into the little plastic container. “I guess I can’t make blueberry pancakes for you anymore. Chocolate chip okay?”

“It’s fine.” Eddie finished wiping up the coffee and started picking at the berries. “Chris likes chocolate chip pancakes better anyway.”

“Right. Okay. Chocolate chip it is.”

Once the mess of coffee and berries was all cleaned up, Eddie measured out fresh grounds to brew a new pot of coffee. He slid the carafe into its spot before flipping the switch on the maker.

He spun around, leaning back against the counter with his arms crossed. Buck stood at the island with his back to Eddie, mixing the dry ingredients together.

“Baby, can you get out the flour?” he asked. “I forgot.”

Eddie did, grabbing it out of the cupboard and setting it on the countertop next to him.

“Thank you,” Buck murmured, shooting a soft smile at Eddie. “You’re the best sous chef in all of Los Angeles.”

Snorting, Eddie leaned into him, resting his head on Buck’s shoulder. Some of the irritation in his chest melted away. “Don’t tell Chris you said that, he’ll never forgive you.”

“Okay, you’re the second best sous chef in all of LA,” Buck corrected with a grin. He scooped flour into a measuring cup. “Which, speaking of chefs – makes me think of Bobby – I was thinking we should have a cookout soon. Like, it’s been so long since we’ve seen everyone. Well, not everyone, we work with Hen and Chim and Ravi every day, but like, Karen and Athena and – well, you get the idea. But a cookout in the backyard–” he swept his hand out wide in the direction of the backyard.

The hand holding the measuring cup full of flour.

Eddie was in the direct path of assault from Buck’s wild gesticulating hands.

A white plume exploded between them.

“Oh, fuck,” Buck whispered.

Eddie could hear the horror in his voice, but underneath the horror, the faintest sound of amusement.

He stood there, eyes squeezed shut, barely breathing so he wouldn’t inhale the flour. The irritation that had slowly been melting away came back tenfold, tightening his chest even further.

“Baby, I’m so sorry,” Buck said. “I don’t – I’m sorry, let me–”

Eddie flinched at the feeling of Buck’s thumbs on his face. He swiped his thumbs across Eddie’s closed eyelids.

“Buck, stop,” Eddie muttered, annoyed.

“No, I – let me wipe the flour off of your face,” Buck insisted, continuing to swipe his thumbs down Eddie’s cheeks. “It’s the least I can do. God, I don’t know what–”

“Stop touching me,” Eddie hissed.

Buck’s hand immediately dropped.

Eddie opened his eyes, blinking through flour coated eyelashes.

Buck stood in front of him, the now empty measuring cup still in his hand. His lips were pressed into a thin line. Eddie could tell he was trying not to laugh, but apparently the look on Eddie’s face was enough to hold it in.

“I’m going to take a shower,” Eddie snapped.

“Okay. Okay, I’m sorry, baby,” Buck said. “I love you. Breakfast will be ready when you’re done showering, promise. Feel free to brush the flour onto the floor, I’ll clean it up. My fault, my mess. Again.”

Ignoring him, Eddie said, “I love you too,” before retreating to the bathroom. He carefully pulled his shirt over his head, trying to contain the flour so it didn’t end up all over the bathroom floor.

Irritation sat heavy in Eddie’s chest.

A quick shower later, Eddie redressed and went back into the kitchen. By now, Chris was awake and already eating a stack of pancakes.

“Morning, Dad,” Chris called through a mouthful of pancakes.

“Good morning, Christopher,” Eddie answered.

“I made you a plate,” Buck said, pointing to the table. “Coffee and all.”

Still feeling irritated and a little overstimulated, Eddie softened at the sheepish look on Buck’s face. “Thank you, honey. I appreciate you.” He slid into a chair and smiled at him.

“Even when I spill the coffee and blueberries and throw flour all over you?”

“Even then,” Eddie confirmed.

Buck’s expression brightened. He grabbed a plate for himself and joined them at the table.

As they ate, discussing their upcoming days, Eddie settled a little more.

It was a bad morning. That’s all.

The rest of the day would be great. They’d drop Chris off at school, he’d hold Buck’s hand while Buck drove them to the station, and they’d work a twenty-four before having forty-eight off.

Eddie was going to have a great day.

*

Eddie was having a really shitty day.

The morning hadn’t really improved after breakfast. They’d left the house late because Chris had gotten distracted by his phone when he was supposed to be getting dressed and ready for school.

Which led to them getting stuck in rush hour traffic that they usually avoided.

Which then meant that Buck and Chris had nearly forty-five minutes to discuss whatever rabbit hole they’d fallen into that week.

Usually, Eddie loved listening to them. The way they’d banter back and forth, interrupt each other with another fact about the subject at hand, and take turns answering any questions Eddie had.

Usually.

But today, they’d spent nearly ten minutes without moving even an inch on the freeway. Buck kept looking in the rearview mirror at Chris in the backseat while he discussed the history behind rubbernecking – of all things – and seemed to forget they were sitting in traffic. Every time traffic did move forward, Eddie had to reach over and tap Buck’s shoulder.

“Sorry,” Buck would say, looking back to the road. And then Chris would ask another question or spew another fact, making Buck take his eyes off the road and look in the rearview mirror again.

Eventually, they made it to Chris’s school and dropped him off.

Only to get rerouted around a collision on their way to the station. The usual ten minute drive from Chris’s school to the station turned into twenty-one.

They’d arrived six minutes late for work.

Eddie hated being late.

It always made anxiety course through his veins. It didn’t matter if it was work or a doctor's appointment or a parent-teacher conference, Eddie hated it altogether. It always made him feel incompetent or lazy, maybe.

And it really grated on him when Buck acted like it was no big deal.

He waltzed into the locker room with that stupid bright grin that Eddie loved all the time, but kind of hated right now because they were late for work and everyone just had to say something about it and Eddie just–

The irritation that had started as a marble last night had steadily grown in size all morning. It felt like a fucking watermelon was pushing up underneath his ribs.

He wanted everyone to stop talking for five minutes.

Just five.

Just long enough for him to keep some peace and quiet. To recenter himself, try to push the irritation down before he snapped at someone that didn’t deserve it.

Especially because that someone was probably going to be Buck.

But, of course, that didn’t happen because some higher power had decided to make Eddie the entertainment for the day.

The tones dropped the second Eddie was done lacing up his boots.

No time to even get a cup of coffee before the chaos ensued.

From that point on, it was nonstop.

A pileup on the 405.

A house fire in the hills where the owner kept trying to run back inside to save her Louboutin’s. Somehow, Eddie had been delegated to holding back the botox-filled, platinum blonde woman who seemed to have the upper body strength of a gorilla.

After that, a man stuck in a tree after climbing it to save a cat. The cat ended up climbing down the tree before they got there. The man did not.

A med call at a skate park where two skateboarders had collided midair.

Another car wreck in downtown LA.

And now, they were leaving their sixth call, a four alarm warehouse fire. No casualties, luckily, but it’d taken three hours to get under control.

It was 7:15 p.m. They’d just passed the halfway mark of their twenty-four hours on.

Eddie was hungry (hangry). He was tired. The watermelon sized irritation had grown to the size of a boulder and sat heavy in the bottom of his stomach.

It didn’t help that it was approximately one million degrees outside. Listen, Eddie knew it was always hot in LA. Even in the winter months, it never really dropped below sixty degrees in the daytime.

But now, after fighting a four alarm in full turnouts under the California sun, Eddie was on a hair trigger. Sweat dripped down his face. His turnouts clung to him like a second skin. His body felt heavy, like someone had tied cement blocks to his limbs when he wasn’t looking.

And Buck was enthusiastically recounting the entire call in the back of the engine like they hadn’t all just come from the same fire.

Eddie was trying to tune him out. But every other sentence, he was getting an elbow to the ribs or a smack to the shoulder because Buck was a hand talker.

A bead of sweat started rolling down the back of his neck.

Usually, Eddie found it endearing. Honestly, it was one of his favorite things about Buck. The enthusiasm and excitement his boyfriend always had when he was talking about literally anything. Like, there was a reason everyone called him a golden retriever.

Now, though, the fuse was shortening every time Buck threw his hands wide and smacked Eddie across the chest.

The bead of sweat dripped under the collar of his shirt, tracing a slow path down his shoulder blades.

Any second now.

He could feel it.

Like an angry, buzzing swarm of wasps under his skin trying to sting their way out of his skin.

He was going to snap.

And Buck was going to catch the brunt of it. His irritation, the overstimulation, Buck was going to be the prime target because he would always, always forgive Eddie.

It wasn’t right. Eddie knew it wasn’t right. Buck hadn’t even really done anything that, on a normal day when Eddie wasn’t being a crabby jackass, would’ve pissed him off.

But.

Five minutes.

He just wanted five minutes of quiet, he wanted a granola bar, and Buck was still recounting the fire they’d just left.

If Eddie could just give Buck something to think about instead of snapping. If he could give Buck something to think about so his mind became occupied with something else, something that would stop him from talking for just five minutes…

“And did you see that firefighter from the 136?” Buck exclaimed. “She was such a badass when she–”

The bead of sweat trailed down his spine.

“Buck?” Eddie interrupted his so far uninterrupted tangent.

Buck turned to him with a grin. “Yeah, baby?”

“I can’t wait to see what you have planned for our special day tomorrow.” Eddie winked at him.

Buck froze. His hands stopped moving, suspended mid-air. The color drained from his face.

“...tomorrow?” Buck asked.

Over the headset, Eddie heard Hen snicker.

“Yeah, tomorrow. It’s our special day. You didn't forget, did you?”

Buck blinked, then forced a grin. “Forget? No, h-how could I forget about our special day?” He huffed a breathless laugh. “It’s – yeah. It’s a surprise, so don’t try and weasel any information out of me.”

Eddie smirked. He reached over and set his hand on Buck’s knee. “I won’t. Just excited to see what you have planned for us.”

Buck nodded, a little faster than he normally would. And then his jaw snapped shut. He dropped his chin to his chest, staring down at his hands that had finally stopped moving and now laid frozen on his lap.

Eddie felt a little guilty.

But, for the first time since leaving the four alarm, it was silent in the engine.

He tipped his head back against the headrest, closed his eyes, and exhaled a deep breath.

Next problem: shower as soon as they get back to the station and wash the damn sweat off of his skin.

____________________

Buck was panicking.

Not, like, legit panicking, but his mind was moving at a million miles a second. Which, sure, his mind always moved fast, but this was different. This was…

What the hell was tomorrow?

He’d been thinking about it for the last fifteen minutes, ever since Eddie told him he couldn’t wait to see what he had planned for them. For their special day.

Buck didn’t have anything planned for tomorrow!

They had the day off tomorrow. On for twenty-four, then off for forty-eight. It was a Tuesday, which meant Chris would be in school, which meant they could have loud sex like they always did on their weekday days off before crashing for a nap until they had to go pick Chris up from school, but—

What the hell was tomorrow?

It wasn’t Eddie’s birthday. Buck knew that for sure because Eddie’s birthday was the day before his and it wasn’t until the end of June and it wasn’t June. It wasn’t even May yet, it was the end of April.

It also wasn’t Chris’s birthday because his birthday was in September and came after Eddie’s and after Buck’s and if they hadn’t celebrated their birthdays yet, then Chris’s was still a few months away.

And it wasn’t Valentine’s day because, again, Buck already established that it was April.

Was it their anniversary? They were coming up on a year together. Buck knew that. Had the date snuck up on him before he realized?

No.

No, Buck knew the date of their anniversary.

Right?

Yes. Yes. It was one of the best days of Buck’s life when Eddie finally kissed him in his kitchen. He wouldn’t just forget the date that it happened.

So what in the ever living fuck was tomorrow?

“Buck.”

Buck flinched at the voice that came through his headset. He blinked.

The engine was no longer moving. At some point, they’d backed into the bay. The rest of the team had already climbed out.

Except Bobby, who was still in the captain's seat wearing his headset. He looked at Buck expectantly.

“Y-yeah, Cap?” he stuttered.

“You alright? You look a little pale.” Bobby slid his headset off, hanging it up.

Buck cleared his throat, copying Bobby and taking his headset off. “What’s tomorrow?”

“Tuesday.”

“No, I mean – Eddie said it’s our special day. What’s tomorrow?”

Bobby raised his eyebrows. “You don’t know?”

Buck shook his head.

“Eddie said it’s your special day,” Bobby reminded him. “And you have something planned.”

“I don’t have anything planned. Nothing besides the usual for a day off, which is se–”

“Okay,” Bobby cut him off. “Why don’t you go get something to eat? It’s been a long day. Get some food in you and maybe it’ll jog your memory.” Before Buck could say anything else, Bobby climbed out of the engine.

Buck sighed, dragging a hand down his face. He crawled out of the engine, pulling off his turnouts and hanging them in his cubby before making his way to the loft. He needed a shower, but Bobby was right. He hadn’t eaten anything since the rushed lunch Bobby threw together between calls earlier.

Chimney and Ravi were parked on the couch when Buck walked into the loft, sharing a box of Cheez-Its between them. Bobby sat at the table with his laptop and reading glasses, filling out incident reports. Hen was in the kitchen, making a snack plate.

Eddie was nowhere to be seen.

Buck raced over to Hen. Older, wiser Hen who had an answer for every question ever.

“Hen,” he hissed, standing across the island from her. He gripped the edge of the counter, his knuckles turning white. “Where’s Eddie?”

Hen looked up at him, a handful of green grapes in her palm. “It wasn’t my turn to babysit.”

“Is he up here somewhere?” Because no, Buck hadn’t seen him, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t up here. Eddie could’ve been hiding from him, like, in the fridge or something.

“Do you see him up here?” Hen deadpanned. She put the grapes on her snack plate and went over to the fridge to put the bag away. Buck craned his head a little bit to look inside while she had the door open.

Nope, okay. Eddie wasn’t hiding in the fridge.

“What’s tomorrow?” he asked when Hen crossed back over the island.

“How should I know?” Hen popped a cracker into her mouth. “It’s your special day, not mine.”

“Because you know everything, Hen!” he whined. “You’re, like, Gandhi or – or Dr. Strange!”

Hen stared at him for a long moment, slowly chewing her cracker. “I’m not like either of those people. And this is between you and your man. Do not involve me.”

Buck clasped his hands together in front of him. “You gotta help me figure this out, Hen, please. I–”

“Figure what out?” Chim slid into the seat beside Buck. He set the mostly empty Cheez-It box in front of Buck.

“Figure out what's so special about tomorrow,” Buck muttered, dropping into one of the chairs.

“Birthday?” Chim asked.

Buck shook his head. “Our birthdays are in June and Chris’s is in September.”

“Anniversary?” Ravi called out, making his way over to the island.

“I…don’t think so?” Buck cringed as he said it.

“You don’t know your anniversary?” Hen asked, raising an eyebrow. “You, Mr. Romantic, Mr. ‘Eddie kissed me for the first time at 9:27. p.m. in his kitchen while I was wearing my favorite crew neck sweatshirt and the moon was full’?”

“Of course I know our anniversary, Henrietta,” Buck snapped.

“Don’t you Henrietta me in your time of need,” Hen snapped back.

“So, do you or don’t you know your anniversary date?” Chim asked.

“Well, I’m second guessing myself now!” Buck exclaimed. “But I’m ninety-nine point nine percent sure our anniversary isn’t until May 17th and that is still weeks away.”

“Well, what else could be so special about tomorrow, then? If it’s not a birthday or an anniversary,” Ravi said, standing at the end of the island, rocking on the balls of his feet.

Buck shot him a look. “Do you think I’d be freaking out if I knew the answer to that question, Ravi Panikkar?”

Ravi held his hands up. “Oh, full governmental name. This is serious.”

“Why don’t you just ask Eddie?” Bobby suggested from his spot at the table.

Buck spun around in his seat. “And tell him that I forgot something important about our relationship?! Are you crazy?”

Bobby tilted his head, raising an eyebrow.

“Sorry,” Buck mumbled.

Chim grabbed the box of Cheez-Its and handed it to Buck. Buck took it, grabbed a handful, and shoved them into his mouth, chewing miserably.

“Okay, maybe Eddie is talking about a totally random thing,” Hen suggested. “Maybe he thinks tomorrow is going to be special because you have the day off and he wants to do something. Go out for breakfast, go to the farmers market, grab one of those sugary lattes he likes.”

Buck shook his head, spinning back around until he was looking at Hen again. “No. We don’t do anything except have sex and sleep on the first day of our forty-eight off. We save chores and grocery shopping and dates for the second day.”

Chim slapped his hands over his ears. “La la la! Not thinking about my wife's brother having sex with his boyfriend! Thinking happy thoughts! Pure thoughts!”

Buck rolled his eyes. “Grow up, Chim. You literally have two whole kids. We all know how babies are made.”

Ravi grimaced. “You guys are so open to sharing…everything. I don’t understand. Privacy is not frowned upon, you know.”

“Okaaay,” Hen interrupted, popping a grape into her mouth. “Let’s get back on track here.” She looked at Buck. “Maybe it’s not the anniversary of your relationship, but something else?”

“Like?” Buck prompted, unsure where she was going.

“Like, maybe the anniversary of when Eddie got hired at the 118?”

Buck paused, thinking for a moment. “No, he was hired in August of 2018.”

“You remember that, but you’re second guessing your anniversary with the guy?” Ravi asked, scrunching his nose.

“Of course Buck remembers that day,” Chimney started, a smirk on his face, “he was trying to assert his dominance over Eddie all day long. It was the first time since he’d started working at the station that he wasn’t the youngest, hottest firefighter around.”

“Oh, so you do think my boyfriend is hot?” Buck snarked, looking at Chim. “What would your wife, my sister by the way, think of that?”

“Please, Maddie would not be offended. She knows she’s the hottest, sexiest, most amazing person in the world and that I am completely wrapped around her finger, okay, she would not care that I called Eddie hot.”

“Stop hitting on my boyfriend!” Buck exclaimed. “And don't call my sister sexy is front of me!”

“Boys, boys!” Hen waved her hands in the air. “Put the claws away. Jesus. Acting like a bunch of wild, territorial animals here.”

“I’m quite enjoying the show,” Ravi cut in. “Please, keep going.”

“Shut up, probie,” Buck and Chim said in unison.

Ravi held a finger up. “Not a probie anymore. Haven’t been for years actually.”

“What about the first time you both said ‘I love you’?” Hen asked. “Is Eddie sentimental like that?”

“We said I love you after we kissed for the first time,” Buck mumbled through another mouthful of Cheez-Its. “So, no. Well, yes, he is sentimental, but it’s not the anniversary of the first time we said it.”

“You guys said you love each other on the same day your relationship turned romantic?” Hen asked with wide eyes.

“Well, yeah,” Buck stated, like it was obvious. “You didn’t?”

“No! Karen and I didn’t say I love you until we were, like, three months in.”

“Maddie and I were almost at a year before we said it for the first time,” Chimney added.

“You and Eddie are not normal,” Ravi said. “You guys spent almost ten years pretending you didn’t have feelings for each other.”

“And that’s none of your business, Ravi.” Buck glared at him. “Why don’t you get back with me when you and May are official, how about that?”

“Whoa, hey, no need to get so defensive,” Ravi shot back. “And we are official, thank you very much. But guess what? I didn’t tell her I loved her on the first date because we are normal. We have a normal relationship, unlike you and your man.”

“You know what, Ravi, I don’t–”

“Gentlemen,” Bobby snapped, looking over the edge of his glasses, his eyes flicking between Buck and Ravi. “That’s enough. Buck, just talk to Eddie. And Ravi, you better keep that relationship with May normal, got it? I would hate to have to fire you for being not normal with my stepdaughter.”

Ravi blanched. “Y-yes, sir, Captain Nash. All normal. Totally normal relationship with your stepdaughter.”

“Not gonna talk to Eddie about it, Bobby, thanks though.” Buck shoved another handful of Cheez-Its in his mouth, chewing slowly. “What do I do? I don’t know what is so special about tomorrow, I don’t know–”

“What is this, a meeting of the minds?” Eddie called from the top of the stairs, making his way across the loft. His hair was still damp from his shower, one stubborn strand laying across his forehead. He looked refreshed, more relaxed than Buck had seen him all day.

Buck cut everyone with a look, one that said ‘don’t say a word’ before spinning around and shooting Eddie a big smile.

“Just telling them all about what I have planned for tomorrow!” Buck exclaimed, probably a little louder than necessary. “And don’t ask me anything else about it because I know you’ll weaponize those pretty brown eyes and turn them all soft and I’ll spill everything because I’m weak when pretty men like you smile at me.”

Behind him, Hen, Ravi, and Chim all groaned in unison. Buck flicked his eyes to Bobby, who gave him a thumbs up.

Eddie stood in front of Buck with a strange look on his face. Buck couldn’t interpret it.

“Okay, weirdo,” Eddie started. He leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to Buck’s forehead. “I’m just grabbing a quick snack and then I’m going to hit the bunks.”

“Y-yeah, okay,” Buck stuttered, mind still reeling. “Sweet dreams.”

Eddie walked over to the cupboard and grabbed a granola bar, then a water bottle from the fridge. He gave everyone a salute before descending down the stairs again.

“Smooth, Buckley,” Ravi taunted.

Buck spun around in his chair and pointed a finger at him. “I will end you.”

“Is that before or after you remember why tomorrow is special?”

“Okay, Panikkar, I’ve had just about enough of–”

“Buck.” Bobby’s tone was gentle, but commanding. “Leave Ravi alone.”

Like a scolded child sent to his room, Buck stood from his seat, crossed the loft to the couch, and threw himself facedown in the cushions. Everyone else followed him, sinking down into the oversized arm chairs.

“It’s over,” he mumbled into the cushions.

“Buck, you’re being dramatic,” Hen said.

“I’m not dramatic. I’m being realistic.” He turned his head, laying his cheek on the couch cushions. “My relationship is done for. Over. Ended before it even really began.”

Chim rolled his eyes, tipping his head back as he groaned. “I feel like I’m on the set of a midday soap opera.” He threw a hand over his heart. “I’m sorry I forgot our special day!” He gasped, raising the back of his other hand to his forehead. “Please, forgive me for forgetting the anniversary of the first time we farted in front of each other!”

Ravi cackled. “That’s an award winning performance, Chim.”

Chim bowed. “I’d like thank my wife, my children, and the academy–”

“You guys don’t even care!” Buck cried out. “You guys don’t even care that Eddie is going to break up with me and I’ll never see him or Chris again!

“Okay, Buck,” Hen started, “you need to actually be realistic here.”

“I am being realistic!”

“If you were being realistic, you’d know that you would see Eddie again,” Ravi cut in. “You work together, whether you’re exes or not.”

“Oh god,” Buck moaned. “I have to transfer. I can’t work with Eddie after he breaks my heart. It’ll be too painful. Every time I look at him, I’ll just be thinking about what could have been.”

“You’re not being realistic, Buck,” Hen stated, her tone leaving no room for arguing. “Eddie is not going to break up with you. He’s too far gone for that. Like–”

“Like, he literally walks around with heart shaped eyes because he’s so disgustingly in love with you,” Chim cut her off. “Seriously, it’s…well, it’s actually kind of sweet, but–”

“But,” Hen interrupted him. “Eddie will forgive you, okay? He’s got a big heart with you taking up at least half of it.”

“Only half?” Buck whined.

“Well, Chris probably has the other half,” Ravi supplied.

“And Chris!” Buck shoved his face back into the cushions. “I’m going to miss him so bad! He’s like the kid I’ve always wanted!”

“I think Eddie would probably split custody with you,” Ravi said. “Or at least give you visitation rights.”

Buck made a noise of distress.

“If it came to that!” Chimney shouted, slapping Ravi’s arm. “Which it won’t because Eddie loves you and is obsessed with you and probably wants to marry you and grow old with you!”

“Yeah, until he finds out that there’s nothing special planned for tomorrow and dumps me,” Buck moaned. “My heart is beating so fast. Is this what a heart attack feels like? Am I having a heart attack? Oh my god, wait, this is broken heart syndrome. I have broken heart syndrome. This just keeps getting worse!”

“Can you wait to have broken heart syndrome until after our shift is over?” Ravi asked casually.

“Buck, you don’t have broken heart syndrome,” Hen murmured, sending a glare in Ravi’s direction. “And you never will because Eddie is not breaking up with you. He loves you too much for that.”

“No, Hen, it’s over,” Buck insisted. He ran his fingers through his curls, tugging on them. “My life is over. Eddie is going to find another man, one that won’t forget their special days and will buy Eddie flowers and will probably be hotter than me. I’m going to die a lonely, pathetic old man who probably goes bald and spends the rest of his life pining after the one who got away because–”

“—Buck.”

“–I’ll never love again. Eddie is the love of my life,” Buck said miserably. “He’s my soulmate, but I’m not his because I forgot a relationship milestone. I bet Stephen will never forget their relationship milestones.”

“Who the hell is Stephen?” Ravi interrupted Buck’s spiel.

“Eddie’s new boyfriend,” Buck whined.

Chim snorted, then immediately covered it with a cough.

Ravi did not. Ravi doubled over, wheezing.

“It’s not funny!” Buck cried. “Stephen is very competent! He’s handsome! He doesn’t forget important dates! He’s probably great with Christopher!”

“Buck,” Hen deadpanned, exhausted. “You just made that man up. Stephen is not real.”

“You don’t know that, Hen. Stephen could be very real.”

“What does Stephen do for work?” Ravi asked.

“Probably something really smart and cool, like chemical engineering or neurosurgery,” Buck muttered, getting a little too worked up over a fictional man. 

“He probably has some cool hobbies too, like mountain climbing and golf,” Ravi added. “Maybe he's a marathon runner. What're your hobbies, Buck?” 

“Nothing cool like that! I – I bake! Sometimes I run, but not marathons!” Buck exclaimed, distressed. “Oh god, should I take up golf? Would that make Eddie stay?”

“Okay, this has gone too far,” Bobby sighed, pushing up from the table and making his way over to the couch. “Buck, sit up.”

“No,” he muttered. “Let me wallow.”

“You’ve wallowed long enough. Sit up.”

Buck huffed, pushing himself upright and making room for Bobby to sit. He crossed his arms over his chest.

“Buck,” Bobby started, resting his elbows on his knees, “I’ve known you for a long time. I know how you operate, how that mind of yours works.”

“It’s not a fun place to be sometimes, Bobby,” Buck muttered. “Sometimes my mind is a wasteland of negativity and bad self-esteem.”

“Like right now. You’re letting your mind run away on you,” Bobby answered. He leaned in a little closer to Buck. “Listen, you don’t just forget things, Buck. Not when it’s something or someone important to you. Remember when I had that follow-up appointment with my cardiologist?”

Buck nodded.

“You remembered, even though it had nothing to do with you,” Bobby said.

“It had everything to do with me, Bobby, because you’re important to me,” Buck stated. “Of course I remembered it.”

“I know. And that just proves my point. You remembered something that wasn’t your responsibility to remember.” A corner of Bobby’s mouth turned up into a half-smile. “Because you don’t forget important things about the important people in your life.”

“You remembered Mara’s favorite cake flavor when it was her birthday,” Hen added.

“Yeah, and we never have to remind you when we need you to pick Jee and Nash up from daycare. You just always remember the day and time,” Chim tacked on. “Because you’re reliable.”

“And you have a big heart,” Hen cut in. “You make space for the people and the things that mean the most to you. Especially Eddie.”

“This is really nice, guys, but that doesn’t mean I just magically remember what tomorrow is,” Buck mumbled.

“Maybe Eddie’s version of special is different from yours. Maybe Eddie’s just excited to spend the day with you and that’s why it’s special,” Bobby murmured.

Chim faked a cough. “Like we’ve been trying to tell you.”

“Not me,” Ravi interjected. “I’ve been feeding the delusion. It’s my civil duty as Buck’s biggest opp.”

“Not helpful, Ravi,” Bobby said.

“My apologies, father-in-law.” Ravi sat back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest.

Bobby raised his eyebrows. “Do not call me that.”

“Right, sorry. Captain Nash. S-sir,” Ravi stuttered, dropping his arms and sitting up a little straighter.

Buck snorted. “Suck it, Panikkar.”

Bobby blew out a breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Buck. Not appropriate.” He turned back to face Buck. “Be honest with Eddie. Tell him the truth before this gets even further out of hand.”

“Maybe buy him a dozen donuts or something on your way home tomorrow morning,” Chimney suggested. “Sweet treats always help when your sister is mad at me.”

“Karen prefers a bottle of wine, a book, and twenty minutes of silence when she’s upset with me,” Hen added.

“Athena usually prefers honesty from me,” Bobby tacked on. “Talking about something before it escalates to a breaking point.” He raised an eyebrow pointedly at Buck.

Buck sighed. “Okay. Thanks. I’ll heed your suggestions, think about what to tell Eddie, and probably spiral a little bit longer.”

“Par for the course,” Ravi mumbled.

“Maybe tell him sooner rather than later?” Bobby suggested. “Don’t wait until tomorrow when he’s already expecting something special.”

“Yeah, I’ll head down to the bunkroom and talk to him. If I don’t come out of there within twenty minutes, just know that Eddie dumped me, I threw myself off the roof, and Stephen is already planning their wedding. It was nice knowing you all.”

Ravi groaned. “Again with the theatrics.”

Buck, like the mature adult he was, stuck his tongue out at him before pushing himself up from his seat. He crossed the room to the stairs, descending them quickly, trying to figure out what he was going to tell Eddie.

Halfway to the bunk room, the tones dropped.

Buck froze, jaw dropping open. “Really?” he muttered up at the ceiling, throwing his arms wide. “You couldn’t have waited another fifteen minutes to have an emergency?” He wasn’t quite sure who he was talking to. The tones, the citizens of LA, maybe God himself.

“Hey, honey,” Eddie was suddenly standing in front of him, sleep rumpled from his power nap in the bunkroom.

Buck flinched. “O-oh, hey, hi, hello Ed-Eddie. Baby.”

Eddie furrowed his brows, a confused smile on his face. “You good?” He reached for Buck’s hand, grabbing it and pulling him towards the engine. “You look like you saw a ghost.”

He forced a chuckle, trying to relax. “You don’t believe in ghosts.”

“Doesn’t make you look any less haunted,” Eddie quipped.

“Nope! That’s, uh, that’s just my face. No ghosts here, don’t you worry,” Buck stammered. “Nooo reason to worry at all.”

Eddie nodded slowly, like Buck was being weird.

Which.

Fair.

He was being weird. But that was kind of his default and Eddie knew that when they first started dating, so it shouldn’t really be that surprising to him.

“Okay,” Eddie finally conceded, tugging his turnouts on. “If you’re sure.”

From that point on, the calls were endless again. Every time Buck thought he’d have a moment to pull Eddie aside and talk to him, the tones dropped.

Somehow, this was all Stephen’s fault. Stephen was conspiring against Buck. Stephen was causing chaos around Los Angeles and keeping Buck from talking with Eddie. Stephen was actively trying to ruin Buck’s life.

Buck was going to kick Stephen’s ass if he ever saw him.

____________________

Buck was being weird.

Buck was always weird, but like, in an endearing way.

This was different. This was not endearing.

This was…Buck was being quiet.

Not just quiet, he was downright silent. And that set off every single alarm bell in Eddie’s head.

The rest of their shift had been busy. From nine p.m. until they handed the reins over to B-shift thirty minutes ago, it hadn’t really slowed down at all.

But that hadn’t bothered Eddie. After a chance to shower, eat something, and rest for a little while in the silence of the bunkroom, he felt like a new person. The irritation that had been buzzing under his skin since that phone call with his mother the night prior had finally gone quiet.

Anyway, Buck was being weird.

Every few seconds, Buck turned to look at Eddie. When Eddie tried to catch his gaze, Buck turned his head and stared straight out the windshield.

Buck didn’t change the radio station when Eddie turned it to country. Buck always changed the station when Eddie turned it to country.

He didn’t even hardly react when Eddie suggested they have sex on the couch instead of their bed because Chris was at school and they had the option to.

Buck eased the truck into the driveway and put it in park, but he didn’t kill the engine. He sat back in his seat, hands wrapped around the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles turned white.

“Are you okay?” Eddie blurted.

Buck nodded. “Yeah. Totally okay. Better than okay.”

“Then why is the truck still running?”

“I have to – Maddie. She asked me if I could stop over really quickly, so I have to run over to her place,” Buck rushed out. “I’ll only be like an hour or so.”

Eddie scrunched his brows. “So, we’re not having sex, then?”

Buck huffed a laugh. “I mean, we can when I get back! Of course, obviously. I – yes. I want to have sex with you, but I need to go to Maddie's first.”

“Why does Maddie need you to stop over?”

“Oh, uh, she – she needs my help with something. Something very important that can’t wait until later,” Buck stuttered. “It’s an emergency.”

“An emergency?”

Buck coughed. “Correct. Yes. An emergency.”

Eddie raised an eyebrow. “What kind of emergency?”

“It’s, uh, it’s a…fruit…emergency.” Buck winced, like even he knew how ridiculous that sounded.

“A fruit emergency?” Eddie echoed. “Your sister is having a fruit emergency?”

“A fruit emergency.”

“Okay,” Eddie nodded, clasping his hands together in his lap. “What is the state of this fruit emergency?”

“Um – apples! S-she needs my help with – with apples.”

“Apples,” Eddie deadpanned.

“Mhm. Apples,” Buck confirmed, nodding his head like he had to convince himself.

It was quiet for a moment.

Then, “What exactly does that mean, Buck?”

“It means…well,” Buck cleared his throat. “So, Maddie wants to make apple turnovers, right? And she’s never made apple turnovers, so she wants me to come over and – and taste test apples with her to see which apple would taste the best in her turnovers.” He paused. “Because I’m a baker. I bake things. I have a very respected opinion about apples.”

“Taste test apples?” Eddie said.

“That is what I said, yes.”

“Why didn’t we just stop at her house when we left the station?” Eddie questioned. “Wouldn’t that have made a lot more sense?”

For a second, Buck froze. He opened his mouth. Closed it. Opened it again.

“Well, that’s because – that’s because she didn’t text me until we were almost here,” Buck said, not convincingly. “Like, literally as we pulled into the driveway.”

Eddie sighed, suddenly feeling very tired and not in the mood to argue with his boyfriend. “Okay. Sure. Whatever you say.” He unclicked his seatbelt and opened the door, sliding out of the truck. “Go taste test apples with your sister. Drive safe.”

“You too. Uh, I mean,” Buck stammered, clearing his throat. “I will. Love you.”

“Love you too.” Eddie slammed the door shut and trudged up the sidewalk to the front door, listening to the truck back out of the driveway. He looked over his shoulder, watching as Buck drove back down the street.

For a moment, he just stood there. Buck had clearly just lied to him.

And Eddie just let him.

But why was he lying? What was he lying about? Buck was a terrible liar, which is why he never did.

Something heavy settled in the pit of his stomach.

After Buck disappeared from sight, Eddie made his way inside. He went to the kitchen. Poured some cereal in a bowl. Made a cup of coffee. He ate slowly, deliberately taking his time, so he wouldn’t accidentally fall asleep before Buck made it back.

Once he was done eating, he went down to the bathroom and started the shower, stepping under the stream once the water was hot. He washed his hair twice, scrubbed his body until he was nearly raw, and even used some of Buck’s hair mask that he swore he’d never use.

By the time he was dressed and lounging on the couch, Buck still wasn’t home.

Eddie picked up his phone. He had one new text notification, but not from Buck. It was from Maddie.

Maddie: Would you please tell my brother to answer his phone?

Eddie stared at the message for a long minute, reading it over and over.

He didn’t bother responding to it, instead dialing her number and holding the phone up to his ear.

“Buck told me he was coming over to your place,” Eddie blurted automatically when the call connected.

“Good morning to you too, Eddie. I’m great, thanks for asking. How are you?” Maddie responded, mildly amused.

Eddie’s cheeks went hot. “Sorry.”

“No worries. He's not here. When did Buck tell you he was coming over to my house?”

“Like forty-five minutes ago,” Eddie answered. “He said you had a fruit emergency.”

“What the hell is a fruit emergency?” Maddie asked. Eddie could almost picture the look on her face.

“Taste testing apples, apparently. According to Buck, you’re going to bake apple turnovers and wanted his highly respected opinion on which apple tastes the best in a turnover.”

Maddie snorted. “That is absolutely not true. I do not bake. Could not care less about it. I buy them in bulk from Costco.”

“He lied to me, Maddie,” Eddie said simply, though nothing was really simple about it. “Why did he lie to me?”

“I don’t know and I really don't appreciate him using me to lie to you,” Maddie cut in. “He lied to you and he’s ignoring me. What’s his deal?”

Eddie shrugged, like Maddie could see him. “Not a single clue. He’s been acting strange all morning.”

“Like typical Buck weirdness or the deluxe version?”

“The deluxe, extended version.” Eddie dragged a hand down his face, sighing. “He let me listen to country music on our way home, Maddie.”

“Oh god,” Maddie muttered. “That’s a bad sign. He hates country music.”

“I know!” Eddie exclaimed. “I was hoping maybe you’d know what was going on with him.”

Maddie hummed. “I don’t, but let me know when you figure it out. And when you see him, tell him to text me back.”

They said their goodbyes. Eddie ended the call. For a moment, he debated calling Buck, just to check in.

But then, the front door opened and Buck stepped through.

Eddie’s mouth dropped open at the sight of him. Immediately, any lingering upset about Buck lying to him melted away and was replaced with confusion.

It looked like a Hallmark gift shop threw up on his boyfriend.

In one hand, Buck held a pastry box with two iced coffees balanced precariously on top. A canvas tote bag hung from the crook of his elbow. In the other hand was a bouquet of flowers, three balloons, and…

“Is that a teddy bear?” Eddie asked, squinting in Buck’s direction.

And this…well, what happened next was Eddie’s fault.

Buck was so focused on getting in the house without dropping everything that he hadn’t noticed Eddie on the couch yet. He flinched at the sound of Eddie's voice, both of the coffees jolting on top of the pastry box.

Almost in slow motion, one of the coffees tipped, falling off of the box and crashing to the floor. The lid popped off. Coffee spilled everywhere.

For a long moment, the room was devastatingly silent. Buck stared at the latte puddle spreading around his feet.

Eddie pushed up from the couch and crossed over to Buck, grabbing the second coffee and taking the box from his hand. He set both items on the nearest end table before turning back to Buck, who was still staring at the coffee on the floor.

“Coffee is slowly becoming your biggest enemy,” Eddie teased. “Two mornings in a row now. It’s fighting back.”

Buck finally looked up at Eddie with red-rimmed, teary eyes. His lower lip wobbled.

“Whoa, hey,” Eddie said, instantly switching to caretaker mode. “What’s the matter, honey?”

“I dropped your coffee,” Buck whispered, his voice shaking.

“It’s okay, honey,” Eddie insisted. He cupped Buck’s elbow with his hand, squeezing gently. “It’s just coffee. We can clean it up.”

Buck shook his head. “But it’s – it’s not just coffee, it’s apology coffee because I forgot what day it is and you said it was special and I was supposed to have something planned because it’s our special day and I didn’t remember and I–”

“—Buck.”

“–forgot because I just thought it was a normal day, it’s just a Tuesday, what’s so special about a Tuesday? And I know it’s not your birthday or Chris’s birthday and I know that it’s not our anniversary, that’s not until May – but then you said you couldn’t wait for our special day and I don’t remember what’s so special about it and I’m sorry–”

“—Buck.”

“And Chim told me I should get donuts and Hen told me I should give you a bottle of wine and twenty minutes of silence and Ravi was being a total dick about everything and Bobby said I should just be honest, but then the tones went off and they went off again and again and again because Stephen kept causing emergencies and I never got to tell you that I don’t know–”

“Evan!” Eddie exclaimed.

Buck’s jaw snapped shut. He looked down at the floor.

“What on earth are you apologizing for? And who is Stephen?” Eddie asked, dipping his head to catch Buck’s gaze.

“Our special day, Eddie,” Buck mumbled, ignoring the question about Stephen. A single tear slid down his cheek. “I forgot about our special day.”

“I – honey, I still don’t know what you’re talking about,” Eddie said softly. “What’s supposed to be so special about today?”

“I don’t know, Eddie! That’s the problem. I still don’t know what today is. And you told me yesterday that you couldn’t wait to see what I had planned for us, but I didn’t plan anything. I didn’t know there was anything to plan. I just…I’m so sorry, Eddie.”

“I said today was special?” Eddie asked, genuinely confused. “When did I say that?”

Buck frowned, blinking at him. “In the engine, after that warehouse fire.”

Oh.

Oh.

Eddie fucked up. He fucked up so bad.

He’d been so overstimulated when he’d said that. Desperate for a shower, a snack, and some rest. For five minutes of silence.

He’d said that to avoid snapping at Buck. He’d thought giving him something to think about instead of yelling at Buck for doing nothing wrong was better.

He could see now that this was so much worse.

“I know you were looking forward to something special, baby,” Buck continued. Another tear slid down his cheek. “But I don’t – there’s nothing planned. I’m going to plan something nice for tomorrow, like dinner reservations or–”

Eddie shook his head. Guilt washed over him like a tidal wave.

“I made that up, Buck,” he admitted, ripping the bandaid off before Buck spiraled any further. 

Buck brows furrowed. He tilted his head, narrowed his eyes. “You what?”

“I – god, I made that up,” Eddie repeated. “There’s nothing special about today. It’s – it’s just Tuesday.”

For a long minute, Buck was silent, just blinking at Eddie.

Then, “it’s just Tuesday?” Buck echoed.

“I’m so sorry, Buck. I woke up irritated because of that phone call with my mom, and then breakfast when you threw flour all over me, and then traffic, and then the endless calls at work – it was like one thing after another yesterday. I was so overwhelmed and tired and I just wanted five minutes of quiet, but I didn’t want to yell at you, so I made that up instead,” Eddie rushed out, horrified. “I didn’t – I didn’t even think twice about it after we got back to the station.”

“You made it up,” Buck muttered, disbelieving. The flowers hung limply at his side, the balloons floating behind his head.

“I made it up,” Eddie admitted again. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t – shit, I am so sorry.”

“Jesus, Eddie!” Buck finally exclaimed. “I’ve spent the last twelve hours thinking I’d forgotten something important about our relationship! I had convinced myself that you were going to break up with me!”

Eddie winced, exhaling a sharp breath. The guilt steadily growing bigger in his chest started gnawing on his heart.

“And then I spent the last hour driving all over LA to get your favorite donuts from that bakery all the way across town, your favorite latte – which I’m currently standing in – a top shelf bottle of wine, expensive chocolates, flowers, balloons, and a stupid goddamn teddy bear–” Buck continued, shaking the teddy bear in his hand as if Eddie hadn’t seen it, “–to apologize to you and now you’re telling me there’s nothing special about today? It’s just a regular old Tuesday?”

“I am so sorry, Buck. I am–” Eddie raised a hand to his forehead, shaking his head, mortified with himself. “I am so sorry. Once we got back to the station and I had a chance to regulate myself, I completely forgot I even said that. I knew you were acting weird, but I didn’t even – fuck, I am so sorry. I am so, so sorry.”

Buck let out a breathless chuckle, a relieved smile pulling at his lips. “Well, of course I was acting weird. I was trying to pretend like I hadn’t forgotten about our special day. You owe me so big, Eddie.”

“Yes,” Eddie automatically agreed. He reached forward and grabbed Buck’s waist, pulling him in. “I do. I’ll make it up to you. Whatever you want. Everything you want. Name it, it’s yours.”

“You owe everyone else at the station an apology,” Buck quipped. “They listened to me mourn our relationship last night. They talked me off the ledge. They listened to me go on and on about Stephen for a really long time.”

“Who is Stephen?” Eddie asked. “That’s the second time you’ve mentioned him.”

Buck’s cheeks turned bright red. “Stephen is…he’s the man I…made up. In my head. He’s not – he’s not real.”

Eddie blinked. And blinked again. “Stephen isn’t a real person.”

“Um. Correct,” Buck mumbled. “But he was very committed to ruining my life.”

“Okay, we’re going to circle back to that later.” He squeezed his hands on Buck’s waist. “You really thought I would break up with you over forgetting something about our relationship?” Eddie asked. The guilt sank its teeth into Eddie’s heart.

“I don’t know. I…may have been a little dramatic,” Buck admitted, looking sheepish.

“No. You? Dramatic?” Eddie teased.

Buck pouted. “Hey, be nice to me. I thought I was losing custody of Christopher last night.”

And that…Jesus. That felt like a gut punch.

Eddie grabbed the flowers, tote bag, and balloons from Buck’s hand, setting them beside the pastry box. He grabbed both of Buck’s hands with his, threading their fingers.

“Evan, you have to know that this,” he gestured between them, “is it for me. No matter what, this is it. I don’t want anyone else. You are the person I want to spend my life with. And that means Christopher too. He’s your kid, regardless. He always has been.”

Buck inhaled shakily, fresh tears springing in his eyes. “Yeah?”

Eddie nodded. “Yes. And something as silly as forgetting a special milestone would never make me break up with you. Would I be a little upset? Sure, maybe. But not enough to end what we have. You’re my best friend, honey, the love of my life. I’m not just going to let you go because you forgot something. You mean so much more to me than that.”

“You’re my best friend too,” Buck whispered. “I love you so much.”

Eddie lifted a hand to Buck’s cheek. “I love you. I’m sorry for making you panic. That was not my intention when I said that.”

Buck leaned into the palm on his cheek, smiling softly at Eddie. “I forgive you. Of course I forgive you.” He closed his eyes for a moment. “Can I just make one request?”

“Anything,” Eddie agreed.

“Just yell at me next time. Next time you’re overstimulated and I’m talking too much, just yell at me,” Buck said. “I can handle that a lot better than whatever the hell that was yesterday.”

Eddie shook his head. “I’m not going to yell at you, but I will be better about communicating when I’m overwhelmed and just need a break.”

“Okay. That’s all I ask.” Buck lifted his hand, covering the one on his cheek. “Now, you can make it up to me by giving me a kiss.”

Smiling, Eddie leaned in and pressed his lips to Buck. He kissed him slow and sweet, letting his hand drift to the back of Buck’s neck. He ran his thumb over the short hairs on his nape, the way he knew Buck liked.

“I would love to keep this up,” Buck whispered, breaking away from Eddie, leaving just enough room to breathe, “but the coffee soaked socks on my feet are starting to overstimulate me.”

Eddie snorted. “Go change. I’ll clean this up.”

Buck stepped back, bending down and peeling his socks off. “Oh, by the way.” He dropped his socks on the floor and reached over to grab the flowers, balloons, and teddy bear. “These are for you. At first, they were going to be an apology, but now they’re just because I love you.”

Eddie softened. “You’re too good to me, Buck. Thank you.” He leaned in and caught Buck’s mouth with his again. “I love you too. And I’m still really fucking sorry.”

“I know,” Buck murmured. “I named the teddy bear for you.”

“Oh?” Eddie looked down at the little stuffed bear in his hands. “What’d you name it?”

“Eddie Junior. Because he doesn’t know how to use his words either,” Buck deadpanned before a laugh slipped out of his mouth.

Eddie’s jaw dropped. “I – you know what? Yeah, I deserve that one.” He started laughing with Buck. “Go change, then we can split the box of donuts and watch the new episode of that cooking show you like.”

Buck smirked, that familiar half-smile that made Eddie weak at the knees. “And maybe have some couch sex? I didn’t forget that offer from earlier.”

“Well, I did say anything you wanted, right?” Eddie confirmed.

Buck started backing away from Eddie, heading towards the bedroom. “And tomorrow, you can take me out to a nice dinner to make up for the psychological torture you put me through. Somewhere with candles and fancy forks and…baked Alaska for dessert.”

“Absolutely,” Eddie insisted. “Pick a spot and I’ll make reservations. Literally anything you want.”

“How about an expensive piece of jewelry?” Buck teased. He lifted his left hand and pointed to his ring finger, winking at Eddie. “Just kidding. I’m going to shower real quick. Try not to miss me.”

“I always miss you!” Eddie called after him.

And as he sat on the couch waiting for Buck to get out of the shower, gazing at the flowers and chocolate and donuts Buck had gotten, Eddie’s mind drifted.

Drifted to Buck pointing to his ring finger.

To engagement rings. Proposals. Weddings.

Buck had said he was kidding.

Eddie wasn’t.

For a few weeks now, he’d been thinking about getting a ring for Buck.

Well. Time to start shopping.

____________________

At the start of their next shift, Chimney walked into the locker room with a shit-eating grin.

“Hey, Buckley!” he called across the room. “Maddie has a question. What is your highly respected opinion on Honeycrisp apples?”

For a moment, Buck looked confused. Then, recognition crossed his face. He snapped his head towards Eddie.

“I may or may not have called Maddie and asked her about the fruit emergency the other day,” Eddie admitted, wincing. He held his hands up. “My boyfriend had just lied to me about where he was and disappeared for an hour. I was worried. Sue me!”

Buck stared at Eddie. “Hey, Chim. Remember the other day when Eddie said he couldn’t wait for our special day and I made you all listen to me panic about our relationship?”

“Oh, I remember,” Chim confirmed. “I remember it very well.”

With a smirk, still staring at Eddie, Buck said, “He made it up.”

“He what?!”

“Made the entire thing up. There was nothing special about that day. Nothing at all.”

Hen walked in at that moment. She zeroed in on Eddie. “Oh, Eddie Diaz. I’m gonna kill you.”

The smirk on Buck’s face only grew bigger.

Okay. Buck could have this one.

At least they were even now.