Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Hero had never wanted to be treated differently.

As a young boy, he knew his parents saw more promise in him than his younger brother, and even when he was still a child, it never sat right with him. He didn’t like the way that they ignored Kel’s achievements to favor his own, and he didn’t like the way they sometimes pretended Kel wasn’t even there - they would constantly talk up their eldest son to their friends, and when asked about the youngest, they would brush him off almost entirely. Hero had always wanted to speak up about it, but he had been a pushover since day one, and stuck to silently worrying to himself about Kel’s well being like he did with so many other things.

When they were just kids, Kel was very vocal about how little it bothered him. He had sports, and comics, and his very best friends to keep him company. In his own words, he didn’t need his parents' approval to be the coolest kid there was. Back then, Hero had taken his word for it.

But as they grew up, things became different.

Mari passed away in the first week of his sophomore year of high school. Hero was absolutely devastated - he couldn’t bring himself to get out of bed, let alone take care of his own basic needs, like eating, drinking or even showering. He was just so heartbroken. Heartbroken to the point that he had exploded on Kel, tearing him a new one as he screamed about how Kel didn’t care, and how he was useless and a liar when he said he missed Mari. Each word that fell from his mouth got more and more aggressive, until Hero was spouting things that he never once in his life would ever mean. By the time he was done, Kel was a sobbing mess on the floor. Hero was no better.

Almost as soon as the yelling had stopped, the brothers parents barged in and took in the scene before them. Instead of doing their best to comfort both boys, they immediately made a beeline for their golden child, leading him out of the room, arms wrapped comfortingly around his shoulders. Hero’s mother soothed him with soft touches and gentle words, calming him back down as they sat on the couch in the living room together. His father draped a blanket over him before ducking into the kitchen to make everyone some tea. It was only when the mug was in his hands that Hero really realized the gravity of the things he’d said to Kel, and immediately shook off his parents to make sure that he was alright. When he arrived, it was plain and clear that Kel was not okay. Hero did his very best to console him, but it was for naught. Kel wouldn’t even look him in the eyes.

It was at that moment that Hero decided he wasn’t going to wallow in his sorrows anymore. Kel needed him, and he needed Kel. He couldn’t be consumed by grief - that was no way to live.

Weeks after the argument, when both boys were in a seemingly better place, Hero decided to ask Kel if he really was okay, and reiterated how awful he felt about the nasty things he’d said. Kel shrugged it off. He said he forgave him, and that it was just water under the bridge. They were moving on.

As Kel spoke, Hero looked him in the eyes, and felt a pit in his stomach. He didn’t know why, but he felt like Kel was lying. But he didn’t push it. After all, he didn’t want to stir the pot anymore than he already had.

_______

Four years went by before Hero could seem to take notice. Each and every season that passed felt like one in the same, and as summer once again graced Faraway Town, Hero returned from his first year at medical school. It had been incredibly gruelling and stressful at times, but Hero was thankful to get some time away. As much as he loved his family, they could all be a bit much at times. Especially Kel. He loved that kid, but his energy was boundless, and most of the time, Hero couldn’t seem to keep up with him.

However, his first day back was nothing like he had expected it would be. Instead of being greeted at the door by a bear hug from Kel, or being bombarded by questions from both of his parents, he was met with silence. Not even his baby sister, Sally, could be heard sleeping soundly upstairs. It appeared that no one was home. That was all well and good, although as he dragged his bags upstairs and settled back into he and Kel’s shared space, he couldn’t help but feel as if something was off. There was no note from his parents, nor prior indication that he would return to an empty house. Just what was going on?

A quiet ping from Hero’s phone quickly answered that question.

As he scanned the message, Hero felt his heart rate pick up speed.

From: Kelsey

hey bro i dunno if youre home yet or anything but if u are plsplspls hurry 2 faraway park its an emergency. aubrey is here and shes going nutso

Hero shot back a quick confirmation that he was on his way, and once again felt his phone buzz as he sprinted down the stairs and out the front door. Glancing down out of the corner of his eye, Hero read the message. His pace only increased.

From: Kelsey

oh thank god pls come quick

From: Kelsey

holyshit aubrey pushed basil into the lake hurry

By the time he had read the contents of the third message, Hero was tearing through the bushes that concealed their old hideout, tossing his phone on the ground and taking a nose dive off the dock and into the murky waters below. He hadn’t even bothered to so much as look at Kel or Aubrey. There was no time to waste. Basil was in danger.

Cold water swamped Hero’s entire body as he swam downwards, looking desperately with blurry vision for the sinking boy. A familiar shock of blonde hair caught his eye almost instantly, and he yanked Basil into his grasp, preparing himself to kick upwards. It was only then that he noticed Basil wasn’t alone down there. A pale and familiar hand grasped weakly at Hero’s ankles and he looked down in shock, eyes meeting with those of a boy he was sure he was never going to see again.

Sunny was down there. Sunny, who may as well have died right along with Mari, as no one saw him again after her funeral. Sunny, who was terrified of life itself without his sister.

Sunny, who had never learned how to swim.

Hero was running out of breath as he shifted Basil over his shoulder and yanked Sunny upwards with as much force as he could, pulling the boy under his free arm before kicking violently. The surface of the water was just barely within reach. Light swirled above Hero’s head as he gave one final, powerful kick upwards, breaching the surface and letting out a loud gasp. Kel quickly cut off his argument with Aubrey, running to meet Hero at the shore and pull Basil out while he got to his feet and dragged Sunny to freedom, veins still pumping with adrenaline.

Hero had been home for all of thirty minutes and already knew that he was going to get much more than he bargained for this summer.

This fact was only reinforced as the day came to a close, and morning once again returned. Inside Sunny’s house (and to no one’s surprise), Hero was the first to awaken. In order to distract himself from the confusion of the prior evening, he decided to do Sunny’s incomplete chores for him, as well as make breakfast for everyone. He couldn’t help but feel bad for the poor boy as he organized all of Sunny’s old belongings - he was only twelve years old when his childhood was violently ripped away from him. Hero had been lucky to be old enough to really be able to understand what had happened. Sunny hadn’t been awarded that luxury.

About an hour into his cleaning excursion, Hero was met with the familiar and sleepy face of his younger brother, who had clearly just dragged himself out of the pillow fort they’d built. Hero’s stomach felt funny. Obviously Kel had just awoken, so he was bound to look tired, but something just felt off about his expression. His eyes looked bleaker than normal, and he carried the aura of someone who hadn’t gotten a good night’s sleep in a long, long time. Nonetheless, Hero cracked a smile at Kel, who returned it wearily. He was probably just overthinking everything; it had been a long day yesterday, and the day ahead was bound to be even longer.

There was a lot of cleaning up (both literally and figuratively) to be done.

_______

There Mari sat, jet black hair flowing in the wind, a white satin dress on her body. She was shoeless, and sitting in an endless field of white orchids. In her hands was a flower crown. Hero watched from a distance as she turned around and waved, beckoning him to join her. He smiled back, taking one step forward-

-Before being forcefully jolted from his heavenly dream by a loud, blood curdling scream. Hero sat bolt upright on the floor, followed by Kel and Aubrey, who quickly scrambled from their positions at the commotion. Someone had screamed from inside Basil’s room.

The group of three were quick to make it to the back of the house, Hero motioning for the younger two kids to stand behind him. Whatever was going on inside couldn’t be pretty, and he wanted to make sure that he was the first to see it. If the scene was as horrifying as the scream released from inside, he didn’t know if he wanted either of them to ever see what the problem was.

Fate had other plans.

Writhing on the floor in what Hero could only assume was absolute agony was Sunny, clutching his right eye as it bled profusely all over the floor. He was choking out anguished and pain ridden sobs as Basil pinned him down, blue eyes full of manic terror and shaking hands squeezing a pair of bloodied garden shears. Hero thought he was going to be sick, but swallowed down the bile that rose to his throat in order to take action, much akin to the way he had during the lake incident. Without a second thought, he lunged for Basil, tackling him off Sunny and pinning him to the ground as Aubrey and Kel dashed in behind him.

”Holy shit-”

“Hero, what- what the fuck-”

Hero looked up at the mention of his name, still pinning Basil to the ground. Kel had dropped to his knees next to Sunny, and Aubrey was still in the doorway, terror filling her artificially turquoise eyes.

“Aubrey, go!” Hero hollered, feeling as Basil stopped struggling underneath him. “Call 911!”

She swallowed hard and nodded, sprinting out of the room, only to be instead replaced by a petrified looking Polly. She watched as Hero released Basil from his hold, too fear stricken to even move. That was fine. Hero couldn’t begin to understand how she had to be feeling right then. Polly had explained to him earlier in the night how she was barely older than himself; she was just a college student trying to figure out how to help Basil best. Now this was what she had to deal with. It was rather heartbreaking.

“The ambulance is on its way!”

Hearing Aubrey’s voice call out from the other room startled Hero from his daze, and he quickly scrambled from his kneeling position to help stop Sunny’s wound from bleeding. By now, Basil had lost consciousness, and Kel had pulled Sunny into his lap, eyes wide with fear and cheeks stained with fresh tears. He was mumbling something under his breath, but Hero couldn’t really understand it. Instead, he turned to Polly, a desperate expression on his face.

“Polly, can you get me a towel, or a sheet, or just- something to stop the bleeding. Please.”

“O-oh, of course, yes! J-just- just a moment.” She breathed, voice shaking.

It was only then that Hero really took a good look at Kel again, and realized how thoroughly disturbed his brother looked. He didn’t think he’d ever seen him look so horror-stricken and helpless before.

“H-hey, Kel?” Hero stammered out. Kel looked at him, but something swirling behind his eyes made it clear that he wasn’t really all there in that moment.

“Everything is gonna be okay… I think.”

Hero forced a small reassuring smile, although he was sure it was more akin to a grimace. Kel didn’t return it. He couldn’t blame him for that.

Another five or so minutes passed of agonizing panic. Sunny was still in Kel’s arms, crying and choking and wailing in agony. Hero had obtained a towel from Polly and was using it to apply pressure to the wound, and as much as it did help, it also made Sunny’s sounds of pain and anguish grow tenfold. Aubrey couldn’t handle seeing or hearing any of it, and had gone outside to flag down the ambulance. Kel hadn’t spoken a word since he entered the room.

Paramedics quickly swarmed into the house, whisking Sunny and Basil away before disappearing as quickly as they came. The group had made their way outside and were left to file a police report, as well as explain the full situation to those on the medical team who hadn’t left yet, but they were all too delirious to really be able to describe the full situation. Kel especially - when it came time for him to give his two cents, he barely said a word before sneaking off to sit on the front step and bury his head in his arms. He was still covered in Sunny’s blood. Hero shuddered at the sight, but went to sit next to him as soon as he got the chance.

“Hey, bud. You doing okay…? I know that was crazy intense.”

Kel looked at the ground. His face looked blank, and in the dim glow from the porch light, he seemed as if he was contemplating saying something. It took him a moment, but he seemed to find the words he was looking for.

“I’m okay, bro. J-just in shock.”

Hero wasn’t sure how much of that he wanted to believe, especially considering the gravity of the situation they had just endured, but he didn’t push it. After all, Kel had never lied to him in the past about his feelings, so why would he now? Right?

“...If you say so. If you need anything, I’ll be talking with Polly. We’ll go home soon.”

“Kay.”

That was the end of that. Hero stood, dusting off his slightly blood stained jeans as he tried to ignore the dread that consumed him. There was definitely a reason for this incident, but Hero had no idea what the cause might be. He could only hope all would come to fruition as he approached Polly, casting his gaze at the dewy grass of the lawn below his feet. However, mere seconds later, the air was pierced by the sound of someone vomiting. Hero looked over his shoulder, and was unsurprised, yet still upset to see Kel with his arm around his stomach, leaning over the bushes as he puked.

Part of him wished he had never decided to come home for the summer.

_______

The rest of the month blew by in an instant.

Sunny’s confession at the hospital shattered Hero, even if he did want to work to forgive him someday. All the while, Kel seemed to be growing more and more distant. He wanted to think the only reason was because of everything that had come to light that fateful day, but part of Hero’s mind was fixed on the idea that there was something more going on. Something that had been for years, but he ignored it because he was scared. Scared of what it might really be, and scared that there was nothing he could do to help.

Summer quickly faded into the chilly air of autumn, and Hero had to leave for school again. Something inside his head was screaming at him to stay. He knew that he couldn’t, but ever since that crucial day at the hospital, fear had gnawed away at the back of his mind. Kel had been acting differently since the confession. Even if he said he was fine, and continued to be as cheerful and upbeat as he could, he had become more reserved. His normally bright and upbeat attitude was more diluted, and Hero couldn’t help but notice the way he never made eye contact anymore. He was worried for him.

Alas, Hero had no choice. After bidding farewell to Kel and the rest of his friends, Hero returned to medical school, trying to ignore the way his subconscious was crying out to go home. To check up on his brother. To just be there for him.

He was probably worried about nothing, overthinking like he always did. Kel was a strong, happy kid. He would be okay. Everything was going to be okay.

_______

March twenty third. Five a.m. The day after Hero had come home for spring break that year.

The sound of something shattering against hardwood jolted him from his restless sleep, and he sat bolt upright in bed, heart thundering in his chest from surprise. Had one of his trophies fallen? Was there something going on? Questions flooded Hero’s tired mind as he glanced around the room, trying to figure out the source of the crash. Nothing seemed out of place, except…

Kel was upright in bed, and he looked completely disconsolate. Hero’s heartstrings tugged as he took in the sight before him, watching as the foreboding red glow of his brother's alarm clock seemed to highlight him in an ominous way. Kel was hunched over, head bent so his hair was concealing his face and arms crossed over his chest like he was hugging himself. The more Hero waited, the more he could be sure that Kel was crying.

Something was definitely wrong.

“Hey, bro?” Hero questioned, punctuating his remark with a yawn. “What’s going on…?”

Kel didn’t respond. Instead, he sniffed loudly, then let out a small distressed cry, already shaking body beginning to tremble even harder. Hero’s chest panged. Without bothering to give it a second thought, he peeled off his comforter before standing and stretching his arms in a wide arc. Then, Hero made his way across the room to where Kel sat, positioning himself on the end of the bed cross legged. Kel’s barely audible cries morphed into soft, hiccuping sobs as he placed a gentle hand on his back and rubbed it in comforting circles. This simple act of kindness seemed to throw Kel into emotional overdrive, and his sobs continued to grow louder until he was almost unable to breathe from how hard he was crying. Hero wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Kel cry this hard before - not even when Mari passed away had he bawled so violently.

Hero didn’t question it when Kel eventually collapsed against him. If anything, he was just glad he could be there for his brother.

A few more minutes passed in a similar fashion, until Kel ran out of tears to cry. He pulled away from Hero with a sniffle, wiping the tear streaks that shone in the moonlight from his face. He hadn’t quite noticed before, but Kel looked utterly destroyed. His chest panged once more.

“What happened, Kel?” Hero inquired softly. Kel audibly gulped, folding his arms to his chest again.

“Wh… why does nothing ever go right for me, Henry?”

It was needless to say that Hero was taken aback by the question. For starters, Kel always seemed to take every punch life had thrown at him in stride. Never once had he shown any signs of struggling with the obstacles thrown his way. Or maybe he had, and Hero had just been too blind to notice. Secondly, Kel rarely used his real name, if ever. That was how he knew whatever was going on had to be serious. An all too familiar chill ran down Hero’s spine.

“What do you mean?”

Kel sniffled again, wiping his eyes with his palms once more as well. “Aubrey just… j-just… sh-sh-she told me she ran away. She’s gone now. And Sunny… he lives too far away to v-visit us a lot. You’re always gone too now, c-c-cause of school and whatever. I’m just… I’m so lonely. I’m so sick of being so lonely, Henry!”

Hero didn’t know it was possible for his heart to shatter any more than it already had, but he was quickly disproven. How long had Kel been feeling like this? How long had he been oblivious to his suffering? Why couldn’t he seem to catch on when the people he loved were in pain? Kel was obviously in a lot of emotional turmoil, and he had done nothing for him even when he noticed things were strange all those months ago. Guilt bubbled up inside Hero’s chest as he felt a hand grab his wrist tightly. It didn’t matter that he was squeezing hard enough to leave imprints. Hero needed to hear everything else that Kel had to say.

“I’m so tired all the time. M-m-m-mom and dad don’t give a damn about me, and everyone else but Basil is just… gone. I c-c-could talk to him, but he already struggles enough as is. He d-d-doesn’t need me being a burden to him like I always am. I’ve always been nothing but a n-nuisance.”

Kel’s voice shook and wavered with every word. Hero felt his veins coursing with concern for his brother.

“Don’t say that about yourself, Kelsey. Mom and dad love you, even if they show it differently. And you’ve never been a burden. Not to me or anyone else.”

“It-it’s… it’s t-true, though. You’ve said it yourself, haven’t you?”

Hero wanted to throw up. Remembering everything he’d said to Kel in their argument all those years ago made him feel such deep regret that it was nauseating.

“You know I didn’t mean a word that I said back then… right?”

“W-w-what’s the difference? Even if you didn’t, it’s still true. I’m annoying, and lazy, and g-good for nothing! I have no purpose if I’m n-n-not cheering someone else up. I’m not p-perfect like you are, and I never will be. I’m worthless.”

“Who ever said I’m perfect?”

“Nobody has to say it. W-we all know. Just look at all your trophies. I don’t have anything to show for myself b-but a participation award.”

As Kel spoke through his tears, Hero looked around their shared bedroom. Medals, trophies, certificates and awards of all kinds decorated his half, whilst Kel’s was full of posters, dirty clothes and unfinished homework scattered on the floor. Sure, there was a stark difference between the two, but what did it matter? In Hero’s eyes, awards never measured one’s worth.

“Come on, Kelsey… we may be pretty different, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re still perfectly worthy of love.”

Kel didn’t respond. Hero’s gaze drifted back to him, stomach tying itself into knots. He seemed firm in his belief that his value as a person was less than nothing, and Hero wasn’t sure if there was anything he could do to help him realize that wasn’t the case. He felt helpless. Though, at that moment, he was sure Kel was feeling even more helpless than himself.

After a short bout of silence, Kel finally began to speak once more. His words felt sharper than before.

“No. Y-you don’t get it, Henry. I’m just. I’m just not. I don’t deserve love. I deserve pain. I deserve to hurt this badly. If… if I was worth anything, I wouldn’t hurt so fucking much!” He cried out, curling in on himself and throwing his hands over his eyes. Hero looked at him with a wide eyed expression.

Kel sat there and cried into his hands for what felt like ages. As he did, Hero watched him silently, unsure of what to do other than keep listening and keep comforting him. Eyes drifting up and down as he tried to figure out what he could even say that might help, he took in the sight of his brother in his distraught state. By complete accident, he managed to accidentally catch a brief glimpse of Kel’s arms, and when he did, his stomach dropped completely and a sense of unadulterated dread filled him from head to toe. He sat in silent shock as he took in the scars and scabs covering Kel, some wounds looking rather fresh. They decorated his wrists and forearms like a morbid reminder of everything Kel felt about himself. Hero wanted to beat himself over the head for being such a blind idiot.

Before he got the chance to keep feeling bad, however, Kel finally stopped crying and looked up. When he saw the expression Hero was wearing, he flinched, casting his eyes away as his face twisted. Hero did his best to calm himself down from the shock as the pair both fell quiet.

A few more moments of silence passed before the younger of the pair finally spoke up again, voice still audibly watery and raw from crying.

“Henry?”

“Yeah?”

“D’you think anyone would miss me if I was gone too?”

Hero was shocked at the question, and his eyes went wide. “Of course! I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t here. I don’t think anyone would know. Why? You’re not thinking of running away too, are you…?”

Apprehensive, Kel shook his head no. Hero was puzzled. If he wasn’t planning on running away, nor was he going to be leaving Faraway Town for good any time soon, then what else could he mean? He thought about it for a brief moment, looking at Kel with intense confusion as his mind tried to put together the puzzle pieces.

When the realization came of what he meant, Hero swore some invisible force had punched him square in the gut.

“You… you don’t mean… you’re feeling suicidal?”

Kel bit his lower lip and looked away. Hero felt his carefully mended heart break all over again. Instantly, he removed Kel’s grip from his wrist to yank him back into a hug, clutching him tightly. He held him like he was going to disappear at any moment. Tears soaked into the shoulder of his nightshirt. Hero gently stroked Kel’s hair as he began to cry once more.

“Kelsey, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I never knew. I just- I don’t… I don’t know what I can do to help you. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. I’m your big brother, I should… I should be watching out for you. Even if I’m not around as much anymore. Just… please, Kel. I can’t lose you too.”

“...M’sorry.”

“Kel, don’t-”

“M’sorry… hic! M’ so sorry, Henry.”

“Shh. Stop apologizing, okay? We’re gonna make sure you get better. I promise you.”

His brother was silent as Hero continued to hold on to him like his life depended on it. There were a lot of things he would have to tell their parents the next day. For now, all he could focus on was making sure Kel felt cared about, safe, and loved. He could only hope it was working.

_______

When Hero awoke the next morning, Kel was still asleep on his side of the room, wrapped in enough blankets that the only indication he was there was the soft rising and falling of his chest. It reminded Hero about how he himself had been for the first year after Mari’s passing. Ice ran through his veins, but nonetheless, he got out of bed and made up the covers. There was a lot of explaining to be done, and he wasn’t going to put Kel through any more by making him be the one to do the talking.

However, before he traversed downstairs, a thought occurred to Hero. One that he really, really wished wasn’t something he would have to consider.

Would they even listen? Would they even believe him? Would they even care?

A constant of the universe had always been that Hero came first, and with that also came the knowledge that his parents were outwardly distasteful towards their second son. It was a thought that made Hero’s blood boil at the mere concept, but there was little that could be done on his end. After all, every time he had tried to stand up for Kel in the past, he was met with a stern reprimanding that “he didn’t know what he was talking about” and that “they were only doing what they thought was best for Kel.” But Hero knew better. It was never about Kel, and always about upholding their family's image. He hated it.

However, maybe if they knew the severity of the situation, they would handle it differently. If they knew Kel was actively harming himself, and thinking about committing an unspeakable act, one that their family had (at least presumably at the time) suffered through the wake of before, they would take action and get him help. It would be better to tell them than leave it all a secret. Hero would rather Kel get the help he so desperately needed than risk it all over his parents' frankly immature and favoritism based behavior.

Hero swallowed his pride as he descended the stairs.

When he arrived, his father was at the kitchen table reading a newspaper, and his mother was preparing food for his two year old sister Sally. As always, she sat in her high chair babbling about nonsense.

As he looked at her, he couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of dread. When she grew up, would she struggle too? Would he fail to be there for her when she needed him? He was going to be well into adulthood by the time she was even in middle school, but that didn’t change the fact that he still felt a sense of guilt for something that hadn’t even happened yet. Hero shook his head as he went towards the cereal cabinet. He was going to need some brain food for this.

When his mother finished feeding Sally, she went up to Hero to give him a morning hug. He forced a smile, but even yet, the anxiety swirling behind his eyes was obvious.

“Hero, mijo, good morning! Did you sleep well? I thought I heard noise coming from your room last night, but I couldn’t be sure…”

“Morning, mom. I slept fine, but… there’s something I should talk to you guys about.”

The words felt heavy on his tongue as Hero watched his parents share a worried glance.

“What happened?” His father questioned, raising an eyebrow as he folded up his newspaper and sat it down in front of him. “Are you okay, champ?”

Hero felt his shoulders tense. Why was it always about him? They didn’t even bother to ask if the problem could be related to Kel. They never bothered to check on him. It made his blood boil, but now wasn’t the time to freak out on them. He had to make sure that they knew what was going on, and he had to be calm about it.

“Oh, I’m okay. It’s actually about Kel…”

At the mention of his brother, both of his parents immediately seemed to become more skeptical. They listened as Hero explained everything that had gone down the previous night, but the whole time, their faces wore looks of doubt. The only time they really seemed to care was when Hero told them that Kel had been hurting himself, and that he had said he was feeling suicidal. Even then, though, they didn’t care in ways that actually mattered. His mother narrowed her eyes and squeezed her hands together.

”Ese niño bueno para nada- Thank you for telling us, Hero… now would you be a dear and fetch your brother for us? I’d like to have a chat with him. And do not come back downstairs.”

Hero grit his teeth, but took a deep breath before speaking again.

“Are you gonna yell at him? Eso no ayudará-”

“Henry. No vuelvas a bajar aquí, lo digo en serio.”

He bit his tongue. Maybe telling them was a mistake.

“Si, mamá

Begrudgingly, Hero slid out from where he had sat at the kitchen table and returned upstairs to rouse Kel from his sleep. Hopefully, for once in their lives, his parents would take Kel’s well being seriously. As much as Hero wanted to help, it wasn’t like he was Kel’s legal guardian. He couldn’t get him the help he needed no matter how badly he wanted to.

Sometimes, he wished that he really was his guardian.

When the yelling started, Hero threw himself into his spring break reading. He didn’t want to hear any of the awful things that their parents had to say to Kel. His heart couldn’t handle any more damage. All he could do was hope that Kel would take it alright, and be there to comfort him when all was said and done.

_______

After the reprimanding from their parents was finished, Kel returned to their shared room and immediately buried himself in his comforter, refusing to so much as acknowledge the presence of his brother. Concerned, Hero stood from his desk and sat himself on the edge of Kel’s bed again. This elicited no response from the younger of the two. Anxiety gnawed away at him.

“I’m so sorry. They didn’t mean any of that, I’m sure of it.”

No response. Hero locked his hands together.

“You shouldn’t be in trouble for any of this. I shouldn’t have told them anything. I thought maybe they would listen if it came from me, but...”

Kel shifted in his spot, but didn’t say anything.

“I can buy you a new phone if you want.”

“S’fine.” Kel finally said, his quiet voice trembling. “I don’t need one.”

Silence grew between the two brothers once again, and Hero chewed on his lower lip as he glanced at his clock. He had to leave for work in a few hours, but he didn’t want to. He wanted to be there to make sure Kel was okay. He wanted to see if there was anything he could do to make any of this right. He wanted to make up for all those awful things he had said in the past. Maybe he could call in sick? Who knew. But he would try his best to be there for Kel. He wasn’t sure he could take another tragedy.

_______

Even if he knew there would be consequences, Hero would forever be thankful for his decision to skip work.

After the confrontation with his parents, and Kel’s immediate decision to bury himself in his blankets and completely shut the world out, Hero was torn in two. On one hand, he knew that his brother was suffering more than he ever had before in his life, and desperately needed support. Who would he be to deny Kel what he needed? Hero had already failed him once as a brother in his year spent as a recluse, and after all was said and done, he’d promised himself it would never happen again.

Yet, on the other hand, he knew how sorely disappointed his parents would be in him if he chose to stay home. If he were being honest with himself, it was mostly his mother who put so much stress upon his shoulders, but it wasn’t like his father was really of much help. He was always complacent to her rampant distaste towards Kel, as well as the way she put Hero on a pedestal. If he were to skip out on work for any reason, there was no telling how she might react.

…

Hero was an adult. It wasn’t like he lived at home full time anymore, either. His mother didn’t really hold that kind of power over him anymore, and even if she did, he wasn’t scared of her. If anything, he was more scared of what could happen to Kel if he left him completely alone. He was actively harming himself for christ's sake. Even if he didn’t outright say it, Hero saw the thin, uniform lines decorating his wrists and forearms. He may have been blind towards Kel’s feelings, but he wasn’t stupid.

After some brief inner contemplation, Hero was resolute. He wasn’t going to let his parents' past control over his life get in the way of protecting his little brother. Without another thought, Hero swiftly pulled his phone out of his pocket, dialed the number for Fix-It, and cancelled his evening shift.

To his surprise, the manager was more than willing to let it slide without need for an explanation. Faraway was a rather small town in which everybody knew everybody, and his boss had said that Hero had been so helpful when he volunteered as a teen, that he’d be more than willing to fill his shift in order to give him the chance to take care of his brother. Hero felt a wave of relief wash over him as he hung up the phone, then put it back in its place.

Now that he had the day off, Hero’s first order of business was to check up on Kel again and inform him of the situation. Even if he was glad that he wasn’t going to have to leave Kel alone, it didn’t completely get rid of the anxiety that gnawed away at his heart. Hopefully he’d be given the chance to sit down with his parents again and really get them to listen. He’d force them to understand if he had to, even though he wasn’t quite sure how he’d do that.

Running a hand through his messy hair, Hero walked over to Kel’s bed, sitting down on the edge like he had so many times before and lightly shaking Kel’s shoulders. He made a low noise of annoyance, but that was the only sort of acknowledgement he gave his brother. It was good enough for Hero, though. Anything to make sure that the carefree young boy he’d grown up with wasn’t gone for good.

“Hey, Kel! I decided to call off of work today, so you don’t have to be alone.” Hero said, withdrawing his hand. Kel remained silent, but rolled over on to his back all the same. Hero hadn’t been able to fully see Kel’s face in the dim lighting the night prior, nor earlier in the day due to the blankets obscuring him, but now that he could, he felt something within his chest break into a million pieces.

Kel looked so… tired. The bags under his eyes had never looked so prominent before, and his normally bright and cheery eyes lacked any light whatsoever. He looked almost like a walking corpse, as morbid as it sounded. He looked like… like Sunny.

How had he not noticed before?

Hero swallowed down the thick lump of anxiety that had formed within his throat as he continued to speak.

“Mom and dad just left, so it’s only us now. You hungry at all? I can make us some dinner and we can watch a movie, or something.” He offered. Kel glanced away. Hero felt his heart squeeze.

“I won’t make you talk to me any more if you don’t want to, but you really should get out of bed. Come on. If you want, I can order Gino’s instead.”

Even if he had visibly become almost a shell of his former self, Kel visibly perked up at the prospect of Gino’s, sitting up on his elbows and looking at Hero with an air of contemplation about him. After a few beats of silence, he nodded his head, sitting up fully and throwing the blankets off of his legs. Hero forced himself not to grimace as visible lines of scars on Kel’s legs matching those that he’d seen on his arms came into view.

“...M’kay, Gino’s sounds good.” Kel eventually remarked, slowly standing up out of bed and grabbing his orange hoodie off of the floor. Hero felt a secondary wave of relief wash over his body. This was good. Maybe he was making real progress.

As Kel pulled his hoodie on, Hero got up as well, traversing the length of the bedroom to his desk in order to grab his phone and order the pizza. The whole time he was talking to the Gino’s employee, however, he could see Kel in his peripheral vision, and found himself subconsciously observing Kel’s mannerisms. The way he picked at his sleeves, how he pulled his hood up to hide himself more. Even the way he kept his gaze locked on the floor and never seemed to stop looking zoned out. Those were all behavioral changes Hero had noticed ages ago, and yet he hadn’t said anything.

Something unpleasant rooted itself in Hero’s mind as he finished ordering the pizza. He tried to ignore it. This was supposed to be Kel’s time - he couldn’t go and throw himself a pity party for being a bad brother when there were much more pressing matters to attend to.

“So! Pizza should be delivered soon! Or, we could cancel the delivery go pick it up, and go to the plaza or something while we wait. Maybe go to Hobbeez. Whatever you want to do.” Hero offered, smiling at Kel. Kel shrugged wordlessly and pulled at a loose string protruding from his sweatshirt.

“Ehh, I don’t really feel like going anywhere.”

Hero couldn’t say he didn’t expect that. Even from the way Kel had been behaving before his breakdown, Hero could tell that he was pretty low energy. If it meant that maybe Kel would cheer up, even just a little bit, Hero was more than willing to forgo other activities in favor of something more relaxing. With a shrug, he made his way towards the door, opening it and heading towards the stairs. Kel followed suit with his hands in the pocket of his pullover.

“Want to find something to watch while we wait for the food?” Hero asked, trying to be as chill as possible. It wasn’t very easy - for some reason, he felt as if Kel were a ticking time bomb, just seconds away from going off. Even if things were going smoothly, knowing that Kel was in such a fragile state put Hero on edge. He felt like if he made one wrong move, everything would suddenly take a dive in the deep end. But, like before, Hero tried his best not to think about it. It would be selfish of him to do so.

“Yeah, sure. Heard there’s a new Captain Spaceboy movie out. Maybe it’s streaming on Webflix or something.” Kel offered as the brothers entered the living room, seating himself on the couch and pulling his knees to his chest.

“Captain Spaceboy, eh? I didn’t know they were still milking that series.”

“Yeah. It got kinda bad after the second one because they stopped following the plot of the comics, but I still like it.” Kel remarked. Hero let out a small chuckle.

“Bad movies are the best kind of movies.” He said, smiling at Kel as he joined him on the couch. When Kel grinned back at Hero, he felt his anxieties lessen. Maybe he was just overthinking how badly Kel was fairing. Sure, he may have had some bad thoughts and depression weighing him down, and sure, his smile lacked any of the light that it usually had, but lots of people struggled with stuff like that! Hell, even Hero himself had, ages ago. It was nothing to get himself so worked up about. Right?

After assuring himself that yes, he was indeed just overthinking, Hero turned his attention to the television. Kel had already pulled up the movie and started it, so he was able to quickly divert his train of thought. Even though the Captain Spaceboy series was a kids franchise, Hero was unashamed to say that the old comics and movies were still damn good. They often tackled real world issues in a fantastical manner in order to keep kids engaged, which in Hero’s opinion, was incredibly smart. He even found himself learning some things from it sometimes. Though he totally agreed with Kel - the series really had gone downhill over time.

It wasn’t to say Hero wasn’t enjoying himself, but the premise of the movie was entirely overdone. Captain Spaceboy had somehow gotten himself transported back in time, and in meddling with the events of the past, completely ruined his timeline. Now, he was on a quest to set things straight, lest he run out of time and lose the life he knew forever. Hero could name about a million cartoons, sci-fi shows, and book series that had already dealt with that exact same storyline in the exact same way. It was so predictable.

Obviously, Kel felt the same way, as he was rather vocal about his distaste with the movie.

“Ugh, we get it! Oh nooo, Spaceboy messed up the timeline! Whatever will he do now? Boo, conseguir una historia mejor! This blows.” Kel exclaimed loudly, sticking his tongue out at the television. Hero laughed at his outburst, and felt a simultaneous glimmer of hope sparkle within his heart. Kel was actually acting pretty lively. Hero really had gotten himself all worked up over nothing. A fleeting, soft smile crossed his face as Kel continued to prattle on about the terrible movie. Things were going much better than he had expected them to.

Thirty minutes later, and about three quarters of the way through the movie, there was a knock on the door that startled both of the brothers out of their focus on the television. Hastily, Hero hopped off the couch and disappeared into the kitchen to grab his wallet before opening the door for the pizza man. The interaction went quickly, and once the meal was paid for, and the door was shut and locked, he entered the living room again, pizza in hand and a grin on his face.

That grin faltered quickly.

“Hey, Kel, the pizza is here- hey, little man, you okay?”

Kel was staring blankly forward at the paused movie, a sour look of what appeared to be major contemplation on his face. He was mindlessly playing with the strings of his hoodie as his intense gaze burned holes in the television, deep in thought. It was a little bit concerning, but would have been more so if he hadn’t snapped out of it when he heard of food and immediately perked up.

“What? Oh, I’m fine. Just thinking bout’... stuff. And I’m taller than you, you can’t call me little man anymore!”

“Are you sure? You looked kind of-”

“Seriously, dude, I’m fine!”

Hero fell silent. Kel hadn’t snapped at him like that in a long time. A grimace threatened to make its way across Hero’s face as he sat back down, putting the pizza on the coffee table before him. Kel was still going through a lot, so he needed to give him a little breathing room. He had a reason to be irritable. No need to read into it.

“Alright. Like I said before, if you wanna talk, you can, but I won’t make you. Until then, let's dig into this pizza!”

Kel didn’t say anything as he unpaused the movie and reached for a slice, immediately chowing down. Hero went to work on the food as well. If he let Kel get at it any more, there would be no pizza left for him.

All of the pizza but one lone slice was finished off by the time the movie ended. The final slice was unmarked territory, and both brothers were keenly aware that there would be a bloodbath if one of them tried to take it now. It was best left alone for one of them to steal later, or for their father to eat without asking.

After that, they both remained in mostly comfortable silence, Hero allowing Kel to pick out the next movie. About fifteen minutes in, Kel ended up resting his head upon Hero’s shoulder. That was something he hadn’t done since both the boys were still rather young, so it caught him off guard a little bit. Hero didn’t object, of course. Whatever Kel needed to feel less alone, he was more than willing to do for him.

One more movie and a few episodes of a Webflix original sci-fi show later, Kel let out a loud yawn and sat up, stretching his arms high above his head. Hero raised an eyebrow.

“Tired?”

“Yeah, I’m beat. What time is it, anyways?”

Hero glanced down at his watch.

“It’s only eight thirty. Mom has to pick up Sally from the babysitter, and dad probably won’t be home for another hour, at least. Why?”

Something dark flashed behind Kel’s eyes so fast that Hero was sure he had just been seeing things. “...No reason. I think I’m gonna head up for tonight.”

“Alrighty. I’ll be down here if you need anything.” Hero said, picking up the remote with a smile before turning the t.v. back on. Part of him felt he should have been more worried about Kel, but he seemed like he was doing okay for the moment being. Maybe, just for now, all he needed was some brotherly bonding time. Hero definitely wanted to make sure that Kel was able to get the professional help he needed, but he didn’t want to think about it right then. That was a duty for tomorrow Hero to focus on.

“Okay. G’night, bro.”

“Goodnight!”

As Kel made his way towards the doorway, Hero began to aimlessly scroll through webflix, trying to decide what he wanted to watch. He was about to settle on some stupid, most likely medically inacurate hospital drama, before Kel pausing in the doorframe caught his attention. He leaned over the side of the couch, eyebrow raised.

“Hey, Hero?” Kel said, not turning around.

“What’s up?”

“...I love you.”

Oh! Hero felt the tension he hadn’t even noticed building within him instantly release.

“Love you too, little man. Now go get some rest.”

“I’m still taller than you.”

Hero smirked and exhaled out of his nose in an exclamation of amusement. “In your dreams.”

With that, Kel departed the room, and Hero continued to scroll through his options, feeling content. Everything was going to be okay. He was sure of it.

...Or so he thought.

Less than twenty minutes after Kel had supposedly returned to their shared room, a loud thud resounded throughout the house, followed by deafening silence. Hero’s once calm heart rate immediately spiked in his chest, and he jumped in surprise, nearly dropping the pizza box he’d shifted into his lap on the floor. That couldn’t have meant anything good.

Already feeling overwhelming anxiety flood through his veins, Hero set his pizza in the box (he’d taken the last slice) and the box itself down on the coffee table, then stood from his seat on the couch, approaching the base of the staircase with some apprehension. His mind was doing somersaults as he called up the stairs for his brother.

“Kel? Is everything okay up there?”

No response. Hero’s heart was thrumming in his ears like a steady drum beat.

“Kel? Are you alright? What was that noise?”

Still, there was no response. The silence that filled the house was foreboding and ominous as Hero swallowed his pride, taking a step forward and ascending the wooden staircase hastily. Each step creaked underfoot as he approached the second floor terrace with a looming sense of fear and dread hanging over him like a heavy cloud.

Upon arrival, Hero immediately noticed that the lights to the bathroom were on, yet every other upstairs light had been turned off, including those that usually illuminated he and Kel’s shared bedroom. Kel had said he was feeling tired, so maybe he had just laid down and gone to bed, or taken a nap? He had been doing that more often in recent months. At the time, Hero had assumed it was due to overworking himself at basketball practice, but now… well. He didn’t want to dwell on that. Better to check the bedroom first, just in case Kel had somehow done something to hurt himself (accidentally, of course. Hero didn’t want to think that it may have been on purpose). Slowly, the bedroom door creaked open, and Hero surveyed the dark room before him.

...There was no sign of Kel inside.

Hero’s side of the room remained untouched and tidy as ever, whilst Kel’s was pretty much the same as it had been when they’d gone downstairs to watch the movie - clothing still covered the floor, wrappers and pages of unfinished homework were strewn about, and posters hung from their tape on the walls, unchanged as ever. Kel was nowhere to be found, and in his place, a strange sheet of folded up notebook paper sat waiting atop his pillow.

Wait.

Hero felt a torrential downpour of nauseating terror grab hold of him as he walked hastily into the bedroom, grabbing the sheet with trembling hands to survey its contents. That… couldn’t be what he thought it was, right? He was just scaring himself because he was worried about Kel. There was nothing more to it. Everything was fine. Kel was just using the bathroom and probably knocked something over. The paper had to be unrelated. It had to. Hero repeated that to himself internally like a morbid sort of mantra as he quickly unfolded the note to read it’s contents.

What Hero saw gave him a feeling to rival that of how he felt when Mari passed away.

Hi, Hero.

First of all, I just wanted to thank you. I was planning to do this when you went to work, but then you skipped to spend time with me. At first, I was kind of annoyed. But then you ordered pizza, and watched a movie with me, and let me rest my head on you like I did when we were kids. You could have been doing literally anything else, yet you still chose to spend time with me. So, thanks. You’ve always been the best bro ever. Even after Mari died, you still came back around again. You tried to help me as much as you could, even now. But this time around, there was no helping me. I don’t think I was meant to exist. Mom and dad have always been right about me being a mistake. I know that I’m good for nothing, and I know that things would be better for you all if I was dead. So I’m taking myself out of the picture, for the sake of everyone else. Even with me gone, though, try not to hate mom and dad too much? Even if they don’t love me, they love you, and they’ll need you around to pick up what I leave behind. Stay strong. And take good care of Hector! For me?

Love, your little brother Kelsey.

As he finished reading the note, Hero’s entire world suddenly went into slow motion. The paper fluttered to the floor as he dropped it, turning on his heel and dashing out of the bedroom towards the bathroom door. When he arrived, he tried for the handle, heart hammering against his ribs so hard that it hurt. The lock jiggled, and the door didn’t budge. Of course it was locked. Hero used all the strength he had to not burst into tears as he reared back and kicked the door so hard that it flew open, breaking the lock instantly and knocking it off of one of its hinges.

”Kel!? Oh my god,Kel!”

Hero choked on his words as he took in the sight before him. Kel was on the floor next to the sink, lying on his back, completely unconscious. His eyes were shut fast, his tan skin gone pale and contrasted by the blue tinge of his lips and fingers. There was vomit on the toilet, the floor, Kel’s hoodie, and around his mouth, sickening the air around him even though it was starting to dry already. On the floor near the bathtub sat an orange pill bottle, tipped on its side with a few small, white and round tablets around it. Kel must’ve gone upstairs and immediately taken whatever the hell was in that bottle. Probably leftover pain meds from something long in the past. Damn their parents for never throwing away any medication, even stuff that should’ve been gone for ages.

“Kel, please, no, god, no, no, this can’t be happening, I can’t do this again-” Hero sobbed, immediately dropping to his knees and turning Kel onto his side so he wouldn’t choke if he threw up again. He could barely catch his breath as he cursed himself for not having naloxone or anything of the sort on him. He was a fucking medical student, at the very least that should be something he carried. Not like he knew he’d ever need it at home, though.

Trying not to get caught up on that, Hero yanked his cell phone out of his pocket to call emergency services. Hot, salty tears spilled down his face, ragged breathing and broken sobs filling the air all the while. Hero could barely form proper sentences as he explained the situation to the operator and dropped his phone to the floor.

Now that paramedics were on their way, Hero tried to steady his haggard breathing, using the techniques Mari had taught to him in their youth to clear his head before he let his med student side take the wheel. As hastily as he could, Hero checked for a pulse, and to see if Kel was breathing. Luckily, though he was passed out, Kel’s pulse was still just barely present, slow as a snail. However, the time between each beat of his heart was beginning to grow. And unfortunately… he wasn’t breathing.

Hero tried to keep himself from screaming again as he mentally slapped himself across the face and recounted how to perform CPR. He could do this. Even though it was his own little brother dying right there in front of him on the floor after attempting to kill himself, he could do this. He had to do this. If he somehow failed Kel again, especially in such a crucial moment, Hero wasn’t entirely sure what he’d do with himself.

1, 2, 3, 4…

A drop of sweat rolled down Hero’s face.

16, 17, 18, 19…

Tears flowed down his cheeks in torrents, dripping down and landing on Kel’s unconscious body.

27, 28, 29.... 30.

Hero wiped at his eyes and swallowed thickly, continuing to the second half of the CPR procedure in a desperate attempt to resuscitate Kel and get him breathing again. Sirens wailing in the distance grew closer. Kel still wasn’t faring any better, but a minor twitching of his hand indicated to Hero that he was still alive. That he was still hanging on. That Hero hadn’t quite lost another one of the most important people in his life yet.

Pinch his nose shut, breathe out once, then twice. Make sure it’s working. Do it all over again.

The CPR seemed to be working, Kel’s chest rising and falling with each of Hero’s breaths outward, but blue and red lights flashing through the downstairs window stole his attention away before he could give it a second thought. As reluctant as Hero was to leave Kel’s side, he shook it off and rushed down the steps as quickly as he could, throwing open the front door and pointing the paramedics in the right direction with a trembling hand.

Hero cried as quietly as he could when Kel was taken from the house on a stretcher.

He wailed softly into his arm as he boarded the back of the ambulance, sitting and gripping Kel’s unconscious hand so tightly that his knuckles went white.

He sobbed into his hands as he was ushered into the waiting room of the ER, left to drown in a sea of uncertainty.

All Hero could do was hope that he hadn’t failed Kel. If he lost him too, Hero wouldn’t know what to do with himself. Only time could tell.

…

Yet, as he sat silently in the waiting room, leg bouncing restlessly, Hero couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, unlike with Mari, this time it really was his fault. Maybe he hadn’t taken the situation seriously enough. Maybe he had been more ignorant than he’d thought. Maybe… maybe he was just like his mother.

A shudder ran down Hero’s spine. That was the last thing he wanted.

_______

A few hours after the incident, Hero received word that Kel had barely survived his attempt and had been transferred from the emergency room to the ICU. His condition was stable, luckily, but unfortunately…

He was still unconscious, and they weren’t sure when he was going to wake up again. According to the doctors, he was lucky to still be alive. If it hadn’t been for Hero’s quick thinking, diligence, and medical knowledge, Kel likely would have died before he ever made it to the hospital.

As relieving as it was to know that his little brother was still alive, Hero was absolutely crushed. The guilt that weighed upon his shoulders was ten times worse than that of how he felt after Mari’s demise - even when he was still under the impression that she had hung herself, the emotional storm inside him had never grown to such catastrophic levels. Mari was his girlfriend, but Kel was his family. It wasn’t to say that he loved more than the other, as romantic and familial love aren’t very comparable, but something about this particular instance was even more devastating.

There were visible signs this time, but he hadn’t done anything. He’d left Kel to his own devices, suffering in silence for months, leading him to the worst possible decision without even realizing it. And now, Hero had to pay the price for his negligence.

Ages passed as Hero waited in the ICU floor lobby to be given the green light to see Kel. At first, he sat in silence, staring out into nothing as he waited aimlessly to be ushered into his brother's hospital room. His hands were locked together in his lap, teeth clenched and jaw wound tight as anxiety and guilt ate away at him. A few times, Hero found himself having to go back downstairs to step outside the building and cry. Not only did he not want the general public to see how much of a mess he was, but he also didn’t want to be disrespectful to anyone else in the halls.

Eventually, though, it all became too much. After his fourth time going outside to let everything out, Hero came to the consensus that he needed a distraction. Kel was going to need him when he eventually woke up, and Hero wasn’t about to let his emotions get the better of him. He’d already done that once before, and after his meltdown, he vowed he’d never do it again. That vow meant even more to him now than it ever had before.

After internally weighing his options in silence, Hero decided that his first course of action would be calling Aubrey. At first he’d thought maybe he should’ve called his parents, but then he remembered that the hospital had already contacted them, and they were likely already on their way (at least they should have been. It had been so long… where were they? Hero tried not to think about it.) So, the second most logical option would be contacting her instead. After all, now that she had run away, there was no way she could have found out what happened to Kel. If for some reason she came back, and he was still comatose…

Hero swallowed back the familiar flood of tears that swelled behind his puffy, reddened eyes as he punched in her number. His chest was aching, but he did his best to push it to the side temporarily. He wasn’t going to bottle it up, but he needed to be strong. He knew breaking the news wouldn’t be easy, but he could sob to his heart’s content later.

Ring… ring… ring…

You’ve reached the mailbox of Aubrey Su-Parker. Leave a message, or don’t. I don’t care.

Beep!

Hero let out a watery sigh and stared down at his phone, thumb hovering over the bright red end call button. Of course she didn’t pick up. Why would she? She probably thought he was upset at her for running away. Sure, he was incredibly worried about her, but Hero couldn’t find it in his heart to be angry. After all, he could understand why she did it. Her mother wasn’t exactly the greatest caretaker.

Nonetheless, Hero swallowed back more tears, as well as his pride, and dialed again. If she didn’t answer this time, he would leave a message. Even if he couldn’t tell her personally, relaying the news via voicemail was better than nothing. A text was the worst possible way he could imagine finding out someone he loved had attempted suicide, so he had ruled that out as a viable option almost immediately.

Ring… ring… ring…

You’ve reached the mailbox of Aubrey Su-Parker. Leave a message, or don’t. I don’t care.

Beep!

Expected, but unfortunate. This time, when the tone rang out, Hero did his best to steady his voice and relay the message as calmly as he could. He wasn’t doing a great job, but it didn’t matter. Hero had to tell Aubrey, one way or another.

“Hi, Aubrey. It’s Hero. Obviously. You knew that already… uhm. Yeah. Sorry. I’m a bit of a mess right now. Uh, I know you probably don’t want to hear from me, which is okay. I’m not calling to nag you, I promise. I just wanted to ask if- well. You probably don’t want to come back to faraway, actually, which is also okay- no. No, it’s not. Fuck, I mean- I respect that you needed to leave, but you should come back. Uh. Yeah. Because, um. S-something really bad happened.”

Hero gulped. His voice was wavering. This was going about as well as he had expected it to.

“Kel, he, uh… he’s- he tried to-“

Hero forced down the small wail that begged to break free from his throat.

“...He’s in the hospital. He- he’ll be okay, I think! Yeah. He’s okay. He’ll wake up, I’m sure of it! He can’t stay like that forever. Uh. Sorry, Aubrey. I’m rambling. You don’t have to come back, but. I think he’d want to see you. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Call me back if you want. I hope you’re safe and well.”

Hero pinched the bridge of his nose in distress as he hung up the phone, sliding it back into his pocket before slapping both of his hands over his eyes and dragging them down his face. After a miniscule moment of silence, a small hiccup broke past his lips. Then, another few hiccups. After that, a full blown sob, which quickly devolved into ground shaking cries of anguish. Hero felt like the scum of the earth.

How could he have allowed such a thing to happen? Wasn’t his job as an older brother to watch out for his siblings? What kind of person did it make him, letting Kel do that to himself?

An onslaught of absolute dread and self deprecating thoughts began to worm its way into Hero’s head as he slid down the concrete outer wall of the hospital, trying to pull himself together. He wanted Kel to be okay. All he wanted was for Kel to be okay. Hero would do anything to go back and make sure Kel was never driven to his breaking point. Yet, it was too late for such things. What’s done is done. There was no way to stop him, since he’d already long since been pushed past his limits.

Hero wanted to scream. In fact, he probably would have if it hadn’t been for a familiar sensation emanating from his pocket.

Bzz. Bzz. Bzz.

His phone was ringing. Hero wiped his eyes and pulled the device free, looking down at the screen with tired eyes.

Incoming Call: Aubrey

Steeling himself with a sharp breath inwards, Hero answered the phone.

“...Hello?”