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After Amphoreus, Sunday had expected his partners to change. After all, one didn't simply spend what felt like hundreds of years inside a planet, a memory, or whatever Amphoreus actually was without coming back different. Which he had no idea what Amphoreus actually was. Apparently neither Welt nor Himeko knew how to explain what Amphoreus was and Madam Herta refused to explain, as usual.
One thing Caelus had enthusiastically told him about was their new powers. Specifically about Mem and Evernight. Sunday would admit, Mem was admittedly adorable. Evernight was…interesting. Sunday would rather die than admit to anyone outside of their relationship that Evernight was extremely hot.
That was something he would continue to bury deep inside of him with shame.
However, one thing Sunday hadn’t expected was for Dan Heng to somehow become taller and get horns and a tail.
Taller.
That was the main thing Sunday was stuck on. However, he felt right in his stubbornness because one does not simply get a massive growth spurt out of nowhere. Sunday—just like the rest of his partners—now had to go on his tiptoes to even kiss Dan Heng properly when the man was in his new form.
Embarrassing.
But even he could admit that he loved the new form as much as his partners did. Although they all loved it for varying reasons. Caelus enjoyed being able to be dominated even further like the absolute bottom he was. March loved the horns. And well…Sunday himself enjoyed the tail a little more than he should.
Maybe it was because he understood having sensitive little extensions of one's body. His wings that his partners had remained absolutely infatuated with even as time passed by. Especially his small back wings, even if they were mostly unusable and he more often than not hid them under his clothing because they were small, weak things that had never been much use.
He would ignore the voice of protest in the back of his mind that sounded strangely like Caelus and March.
But after Amphoreus, suddenly—if temporarily—Sunday became the most mentally stable person out of the four of them. Which was honestly a terrible thing. Although it did feel nice being able to help his partners in ways they’d helped him since he joined the Express.
He just didn’t enjoy the reason behind it. Knowing all his partners had suffered for what felt like centuries to them when in reality mere days had passed.
So, helping them adjust back to normalcy was paramount.
Problem was, Sunday didn’t know how. He knew what to do logically, but that was with…normal people. Or Penaconians. And Penaconians were not your average person either. So he was somewhat at a loss as to how to help.
Not for Sunday’s lack of trying, though.
He helped March separate herself from Evernight when the lines blurred in those quiet moments when she was left alone with her thoughts.
He helped Caelus deal with how much he missed the Chrysos Heirs and let the other man prattle on and on about them for as long as he wanted.
He even helped Dan Heng alter some of his clothing to fit the tail. Which he would admit, was one of the easier things he did to help one of them adjust.
Yet, something in Sunday whispered that it wasn’t enough.
Which was very quickly counteracted by Welt and Himeko reassuring him that he was doing just fine, that he was possibly doing even better than them at getting the trio to adjust again.
Honestly felt like the biggest lie he’d ever been told. But he understood what they meant. He’d been doing everything he could to make them feel at home once again.
Even when it hurt inside when Caelus admitted that sometimes Amphoreus felt more like home than the Express.
But Sunday kept quiet. This wasn’t about him. It was about his partners and them regaining their footing in what felt like a new world. It reminded him of being the Bronze Melodia before becoming head of the Family. Guiding people once more. Putting others before himself. It felt good in that disgusting way. But he refused to stop. Not when people needed him. Not when his people needed him.
But sometimes, finding out what to do was the hardest part, especially when it came to one specific person in their little polycule.
Dan Heng.
Of course, Sunday loved Dan Heng with all his heart. They were in the same polycule after all. Just…both of them very often struggled with showing affection to each other. Which was probably compounded by the fact that both of them were very similar in being quiet and seemingly unaffectionate.
But of course, Sunday had noticed that today, Dan Heng had barely left the archives all day. Which, by his own standards—his very hypocritical ones—meant he had been in there for far too long staring at screens. Plus, he secretly wanted to hang out but didn’t know how.
Getting him to look away from the archives if only briefly would accomplish his goal.
So when Sunday knocked on the door, he was expecting some pushback as usual when he knocked. “Dan Heng?” He called, voice just loud enough to carry through the door. “May I come in?”
From behind the door came what sounded like things being knocked over and quiet curses coming from Dan Heng. A few seconds later Sunday heard a quiet, “come in.”
Sunday didn’t know what he expected upon opening the door, but it wasn’t this.
Dan Heng, face clearly red, in his Permansor form with his tail wrapped around his leg. Not to mention the odd clear layer over it. And maybe Sunday’s confusion was clear on his face, because Dan Heng promptly let out a seemingly embarrassed noise and covered his face with his hands.
“...Are you alright?” Sunday instinctively asked, taking a step forward.
However, the action clearly startled Dan Heng as he took a step back, pressing himself against the Archives’ equipment as his hand moved to cover his mouth at the same time. “Yes. Yes I am.” The words left his lips far too quickly for Sunday’s taste. Mostly because he’d seen that tone in himself over and over when he’d first joined the Express.
Sunday sighed, closing the door and fully stepping into the room. “You seem to be lying to me. Although I cannot tell if it is over pride or over embarrassment.” Sunday said, attempting to look Dan Heng in the eyes, although that failed as the other man’s eyes remained entirely focused on the ground.
Dan Heng’s eyes refused to leave the floor, and he didn’t say anything in response, his hand unmoving from covering his mouth.
“Dan Heng, darling, I cannot help if you don’t tell me what is going on.” The words slipped out of Sunday’s mouth before he could stop them. His own forwardness startled him, but he kept the quiet surprise to himself. Maybe Caelus and March were rubbing off on him. Although he wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad thing…maybe both, he supposed.
All it earned was a quiet, muffled, and frankly unintelligible response from Dan Heng. And after responding with that muffle, somehow, his face became a little redder. But the response only frustrated Sunday further.
“Could you repeat what you said?” Sunday asked, getting a little closer, which only made Dan Heng press himself against the equipment further.
“...I’m shedding…” Dan Heng finally managed to get out, voice nothing if not embarrassed and shaky.
Oh.
“...That is it?”
Dan Heng’s gaze shot up upon hearing the relief in his voice. Sunday was now sporting a small smile. Partly because he found Dan Heng incredibly cute when flustered, and partly because it was a relief that shedding was all that Dan Heng was worried about.
“...What do you mean ‘that’s it?’ Yes, that is it!” Dan Heng hissed, tail moving to wrap around his leg. “It’s embarrassing…” He mumbled after, as if an afterthought.
Sunday couldn’t help but laugh. “Dan Heng. You are talking with the person who has two pairs of wings. You’ve seen Caelus and March preen my back wings multiple times. Why is my feathers molting any different than your tail shedding?”
“It’s different.”
“How?”
…
“It feels different.”
“Now that is more accurate. Darling, please let me help you. I cannot imagine it being comfortable or easy doing it on your own.” Sunday shrugged, moving to sit down on the cot that was Dan Heng’s bed. “If it will make it easier for you, you can preen my feathers after if you would like.”
The offer made Dan Heng visibly pause. Sunday could hardly blame him, he never asked people to preen his feathers. The only reason Sunday had let Caelus and March help with his feathers was because they had begged him for days on end before Sunday finally relented. But Sunday just wanted to help his boyfriend, if laying himself bare as well would help with that, then of course he would.
“...You sure it’s okay?” Dan Heng asked, hand finally dropping from his face, his tail loosened around his leg, betraying his relief. The sight made Sunday’s smile slightly wider. Helping his partners always made him feel warm inside. Although whether it was because of his past savior complex or because of his need to help others for redemption or aeons knows what else, it didn’t matter to him. As long as his partners smiled, even if it meant he had to sacrifice too.
“Yes it is okay, you have seen March and Cae help me, no? You are my boyfriend too, you know.” Sunday said, motioning for Dan Heng to join him on the cot. And of course, Dan Heng obliged, if clearly still slightly apprehensive of it.
What did catch Sunday off guard was when Dan Heng’s tail did in fact land on his lap. Whether by Dan Heng’s choice or by instinct was debatable, because when Sunday glanced at Dan Heng with an eyebrow raised, Dan Heng blushed but made no move to move his tail. Which Sunday decided to take as permission to start helping, which he did by gently peeling off the already loose skin from the tail.
Silence settled between them, the comfortable kind that reminded Sunday of simpler times. The kind that settled in his chest with warmth instead of the weight of rocks like silence in Penacony often did. Although Sunday didn’t want the silence to last too long.
“Was getting used to a tail hard? I remember in Penacony you didn’t have one.” Sunday asked, hands and eyes focused on the tail in front of him. In part because he had to admit some of the skin was stubborn, and partly because he wanted Dan Heng to feel more comfortable.
“Yes, the weight was unfamiliar and at first my balance was a little messed up for a while. And the tail kept knocking things over because I would forget I had a tail, then turn around and something would fall off a table and break or get knocked over.” Dan Heng recounted, a smile on his face.
From there the conversation floated from topic to topic. About Dan Heng’s experience learning how moving with a tail worked, about the animals in Amphoreus, and many other seemingly trivial things. But Dan Heng was talking, and quite a bit, and that was all that mattered to Sunday. He had to admit, he liked hearing Dan Heng’s voice. Although maybe it was the man’s quiet presence too, a little point of calm between the chaos that was March and Caelus.
By the time Sunday had finished, Dan Heng had migrated to leaning against him. Which Sunday decided was a quiet victory as Dan Heng wasn’t much of a talker. At least unless someone was helping him with something, apparently.
Maybe Sunday should go and ask Caelus and March about it once he and Dan Heng parted ways.
“All finished. And might I admit your tail stayed surprisingly still.” Sunday said, a small laugh leaving his lips.
“Shush.” Dan Heng grumbled, tail moving to wrap around himself once again. Which Sunday found adorable. How much he wished Dan Heng would be in his Permansor Terrae form outside of battle. But Sunday would respect his lover’s wishes.
Dan Heng continued, “but uh, you said I could preen your back feathers, right? I wanna do something for you too. As like…a thank you.” As he said it, Sunday could see the blush crawling up his boyfriend’s face.
Now Sunday understood why Caelus always used those cheesy pickup lines, because in the dim light of the Archives in his Permansor form Dan Heng just looked divine. Suddenly Sunday half regretted attempting to ascend to aeonhood, if he did he wouldn’t have ever seen this beautiful face. But then again…that failure was the reason he was here with the rest of his partners. Good and bad thing, he supposed.
“Yes, I did say that.” Sunday smiled, moving to take off his coat to reveal his wings. He usually covered them up with his coat, but his shirt always had holes to accommodate said wings. Considering they were usually folded up over his abdomen.
Sunday then moved to lay down on the cot, wings spreading open. They were black, small, and useful for little other than decoration. Plus they required maintenance every so often due to how much Sunday hid them under clothing.
To Sunday’s confusion, there was silence. When he pushed himself up to figure out why, well it was because Dan Heng was staring at the small wings. And maybe it was karma for him laughing at Dan Heng’s blush because apparently it was Sunday’s turn to.
“They are small and useless, but still need general maintenance.” Sunday mumbled, face red as he moved to lay back down, unable to look Dan Heng in the eyes.
Dan Heng sighed, a small smile on his face as he started combing through the feathers. And as soon as Dan Heng got into a quiet rhythm, Sunday positively melted. He would never admit it, but Sunday’s Halovian instincts also included some subtle bird instincts.
And the sight clearly made Dan Heng smile, judging by the quiet snort that left his lips. Which only made Sunday bury his face in the blanket and mumble a quiet, “shush,” from the blanket.
What made it infinitely worse in the best way possible was when Sunday let out a quiet trill. A bird trill. In front of his own boyfriend when not in the bedroom. Aeons. Sunday was going to die here. While being preened by his boyfriend. Aeons help him.
“Don’t start.” Sunday grumbled, but the grumpy effect was dulled by how visibly relaxed Sunday was. And the phrase only made Dan Heng chuckle.
“I wasn’t saying anything.”
“Mhm.”
Silence settled again, only punctuated by the soft trills of comfort that left Sunday’s lips every not again. At least until a question left Dan Heng’s lips.
“Why are your wings so small?”
Sunday subtly tensed, but forced himself to relax once more. Aeons, it happened when he was a young child, why did it still bother him?
“...My gran–” Sunday quickly corrected the mistake. “Gopher Wood had decided that because the wings were unable to give me stable flight because they were so low on my back and the fact they were black made them useless and…in need of fixing. So they clipped the main feathers for flight when I was young and removed a significant section of them.” He described, as if describing the weather instead of something horrifying.
Sunday didn’t move to look at Dan Heng. Half because he didn’t want to see the pity that would clearly be there, and half because he was sure if he did and saw the same care Dan Heng always had in that idiotic gaze of his then Sunday would surely cry. And this was supposed to be about taking care of Dan Heng, not getting Dan Heng to comfort him.
Instead, what Sunday heard was a quiet, “oh, sunshine,” leaving Dan Heng’s lips. But it wasn’t that pitying kind, no, it was the soft kind. The kind that didn’t disgustingly burn a hole in Sunday’s chest that quietly whispered maybe you were never born to fly. It was the kind that made Sunday feel heard in a way that made warmth spread through him.
“It is nothing.” Sunday mumbled, although the way that Sunday didn’t relax nearly as much as before the topic was brought up really told the truth.
“...I think your wings are beautiful.” The words left Dan Heng’s lips unbidden, hands temporarily pausing in their preening.
And Sunday couldn’t help but softly smile. Maybe his partners really were making him soft. Maybe it was for the better if he could be this loved without strings attached to him ever again. Maybe it would be enough to silence the stupid little voice in his head that always sounded like his grandfather.
“Thanks.” Sunday hummed, not knowing what else to say. He still very often was unsure how to take love freely as much as he gave it so freely. Maybe he needed to give less and take more. Maybe, maybe, maybe–
“No, listen,” Dan Heng interrupted his stream of thought. “They are beautiful. Even if they can’t fly anymore, they’re still a part of you, right? And every part of you is beautiful. Even if you can be a little bit of a smart-ass sometimes, you’re a very pretty smart-ass.” Dan Heng rambled, a smile on his face, if one tinged with sadness.
Sunday didn’t know how to respond to that. Not when he had just laid himself bare and instead of being dismissed he had been held gently. He was surely going to throw up. There were simply too many feelings lodged in his chest.
“Thank you, darling,” was all Sunday could get out through his shaky voice. Maybe this was actual love. Not the harsh, strict, conditional love of his grandfather but the kind, gentle, soft love from his partners. Maybe he had been imbibing the wrong love since the beginning. Maybe he had more to fix about himself than he thought.
For now he didn’t need to think about that, did he? Here with his lover he didn’t need to worry. At least not when Dan Heng’s hands resumed preening and Sunday relaxed once more. Silence comfortably wrapping around them until quiet trills started leaving Sunday’s lips once more.
And time passed just like that.
By the time Dan Heng had finished, Sunday had started dozing off. And instead of waking him, he covered him with a blanket. However, instead of going back to his usual Data Bank sorting, he decided to write in his personal journal:
Show Sunday’s wings more love. Ask March and Caelus for assistance.
Before ultimately laying down on the cot and curling up against Sunday and letting his own eyes close. Maybe both of them were bad at showing affection. Maybe both of them were stumbling through it. But at least for tonight both of them were happy.
At least for tonight, Sunday once again fell asleep wrapped in warmth and without a disgusting feeling in his stomach, something that would more than likely keep occurring.