Chapter Text
Victoria's not sure how she's keeping her eyes open. She's running on fumes, barely able to think straight, and all she wants to do is fall down face first into her comfy mattress, eyes closed, and sleep for a thousand years. Or at least until her next shift.
It's honestly….it's nice. It's nice to not think. To not be stressed.
She's stressed all the time.
Right now though, leaning against McKay's side, head on her shoulder…she doesn't feel stressed. There's no thoughts - about work, about her plans following this rotation, about her mother - besides how firm Cassie feels against her side and how good her arm looks in this tank top.
There's no thoughts. Just that weird fuzzy feeling that she can't quite place.
She's felt it before but she's never really had time to interrogate it. It's hard to, when those thoughts are jostling for space in her mind with…..everything else.
There's movement nearby, but Victoria can't tell what it is. She hears muttered, thinly veiled anger from her left about Whitaker having departed already - Santos probably - and something about karaoke. Something Victoria's never done before but…right now, she imagines would be kinda nice. If she didn't think she'd face plant the second she got up there.
"You gonna crash, Crash?"
Ugh.
Victoria doesn't have the energy to come up with a retort. Even if the bubbling anger that comes from Santos' every action does scare her a little, Victoria can't help but like their banter, at least a little. It's fun. Right now though, her brain feels too muddled to even think of what to say.
She can feel McKay's head move though, just a little, and judging by the way that Santos doesn't have a follow up, she imagines that she's been effectively shut up.
"You awake?" Cassie mutters, Victoria feeling the words rather than hearing them. They're nice. Calming. The way that you should speak to someone you supposedly 'care' about. Victoria finds that she likes that.
"Barely," She mutters, and McKay just hums again, a hand coming up to lightly rub at Victoria's back. It's really really nice. "I could totally fall asleep right here. Forever."
McKay huffs out a laugh. "I don't think that would be as comfortable as it looks," she says. "Did you bring a car today? No offense, but you don't look like you're in any shape to drive."
"I um…." Victoria stammers, not even really sure who drove her, or if she drove, or how she even got here. It's all a blur, and any thought she tries to put together is hammered out of her brain by a combination of fireworks and the firm comforting press of McKay against her side. "My parents..…they drove me. I think. I'm pretty sure."
Oh god Victoria doesn't think she can survive the car ride home.
She can already picture it. Questions about Mrs. Burns and the sigmoid volvulus. Thinly veiled remarks about how her mother heard about Victoria's helping with Mr. Diaz and how neurosurgery is a 'respectable' option that requires a lot of hard work and how Victoria should start studying for a rotation there immediately, and….and everything else. She can already picture the quizzing that's going to happen because of it. Questions she's not going to be able to answer because she's so tired and she can barely think, which means her mom is going to quiz her even more and design 'lesson plans' for her and her dad is going to try to be comforting but he'll have that look of disappointment and Victoria won't be able to go to sleep because if she wants that look gone, she really does need to study and….oh god oh god oh god
"Hey….Vic. You okay, kiddo?"
Victoria can't quite place why hearing that word from McKay - directed at her - makes her stomach turn. Why it just feels wrong.
"Um…yeah," she stammers out, doing her best to wrangle her phone from her pocket. "I should probably text my mom to see if she's…."
"I can give you a ride," Cassie offers, and Victoria feels her world stop on its axis. "Tell me if I'm overstepping, but I heard about your mom's….teaching moment earlier. If you want a quieter ride home, I'd love to give you that. Even if you only want to sleep for a little bit."
It's so nice. Cassie's so nice. She's how someone should act with someone they…someone they care for.
"I…that would be awesome. Perfect. Thank you."
"Anytime," McKay smiles. "I'm ready to go whenever you are, so just…say the word."
Victoria sighs as she leans further into Cassie's side. "I could pass out right now." It gets a small laugh, and she feels that dopamine rush all over again. "I'll just text my mom, and then we can go?"
"Take as long as you need."
Victoria can't help the smile on her face as she removes herself from McKay's side, muttering a quick 'be right back' before she steps away, phone in hand. She needs to take a breath before she starts typing out her response.
July 4th 2026: 9:10 PM
Dr. Eileen Shamsi (Mom)
Your father and I are going home soon.
I trust you're not behind on your charting?
July 4th 2026: 9:30 PM
Dr. Eileen Shamsi (Mom)
I expect a response when I text you, Victoria.
Your father and I are trying to make our plans for tonight .
July 4th 2026: 9:45 PM
Dr. Eileen Shamsi (Mom)
If you want us to take you seriously, ignoring me will not help with that.
July 4th 2026: 9:54PM
Victoria Javadi
Hi Mom
I have a ride home. You and dad can leave whenever
If you haven't left already
Have fun! You don't need to wait up for me
Dr. Eileen Shamsi (Mom)
Dr. Eileen Shamsi (Mom) is typing…..
Victoria quickly puts her phone on do not disturb and stuffs it in her pocket. She just….she can't. She just can't.
She's already dreading their next conversation and….and she doesn't think that should be the relationship daughters have with their mothers. Or with anyone they love. They shouldn't be scared to talk to them or see them, or to question if just saying 'I love you' will be reciprocated.
She doesn't even know how she's going to bring up emergency psychiatry. It might be the only thing her mom would respect less than emergency medicine.
She's so fucked. Victoria's so unbelievably fucked.
"Having a crisis there, Crash?"
Victoria's pulled out of her thoughts by…literally the only person who calls her that, Santos taking one last swig of her beer as she sways over.
"I'm too tired for this," Victoria mutters as she pinches the bridge of her nose, thankful once again for how drained she is because she doesn't think it's possible for a stress headache when you have this little brain function. "What do you want, Santos?"
"Woah," Santos raises an eyebrow. "Was just being friendly."
"You know, I really doubt that."
Victoria can see Santos' gaze narrow, just a little. She doesn't know her that well - if she's being honest, she likes Whitaker more - but it's not that hard to see when something gets to Santos more than she wants to let on. "Whatever," Trinity groans. "Mel and I are gonna head out. Hit the bar, do some scream therapy. You wanna come?"
Oh. Now Victoria kinda feels bad.
"I…I don't have a fake ID," Victoria uses as her excuse. It's true - she drinks, but she doesn't really go to bars or clubs yet - and she hopes Santos will buy it.
But….of course she doesn't. Because she never makes things easy. "You're hot, and you're twenty-one in like, what…three days? Bouncers aren't paid enough to deal with that shit."
"You think I'm hot?"
"You coming or not, Crash?" Santos rolls her eyes. There's a light tinge to her cheeks though, and Victoria isn't sure if it's a blush or the alcohol.
"Um….I'll pass. Thanks though. I think I'll literally black out if I even try to sing. I'm just gonna go home and sleep until my next shift."
"Thems the breaks," Trinity mutters, hands stuffed into her pockets. "Kinda wanna see what your karaoke song is. You're a Swiftie, aren't you? You definitely are," She questions, and…Victoria's not going to give herself away that easy, so she keeps her mouth shut. "Whatever. Have a fun drive home with mommy dearest."
"Oh um….McKay's driving me."
Victoria immediately realizes that was a mistake. Santos perks up - more than she has in hours - and the grin on her face is absolutely feral. "Same difference. Just a different type of Mommy Dearest. Come to Mommy, right? Or cum for Mommy, maybe? Whatever. I'm workshopping it."
Victoria swears she feel her cheeks heating up.
"We're absolutely not doing this right now. Have fun at karaoke," she mutters, hands firmly in her pockets as she tries to step around Trinity and make her way back to McKay.
"Can't really blame you," Trinity continues, leaning in with her voice low as she keeps pace. "She's really got the guns out right now, huh? And you've got your…whole thing, so being into a MILF makes sense. Honestly, …"
"Where's Garcia?"
"I…what?"
Victoria knows it's mean. She knows it's mean but she needs Trinity to stop. She needs her to stop vocalizing this thing, unknowingly putting words to the feelings that Victoria knows are roiling around in her stomach every time she's near McKay. She needs her to stop and it's mean - it's so mean - but it's the easiest way she can think of to get Santos to leave.
"It's July Fourth, right? It's probably nothing, but I'm just surprised your girlfriend isn't…"
"She's not my…" Santos groans, and Victoria can practically see the frustration roiling through her shoulders. "Fine. Whatever. Fuck you too. I'll see you next shift, Crash."
She watches Santos stomp back over to Mel, not even looking back as they quickly pack their things up, say goodbye to everyone - only Mel says goodbye to Victoria - and then head out. The whole time, Victoria…she feels bad, in a way.
She's not even sure if she should. Santos gives her so so much shit, and was saying fake, untrue things about McKay, and…what else was Victoria supposed to do? It's the easiest way to deal with Santos. Make her have to admit to feeling something real.
Still…she feels bad. Whitaker says there's more to Trinity than meets the eye, and in moments like this, Victoria thinks he might be right. That she's not just bluster and thinly veiled barbs and cruelty. That there's a reason for it that Victoria doesn't know about because…frankly, because they're not that close. She only knows Trinity's name because Dennis mentioned it one time.
"Hey," McKay cuts through those thoughts as she comes over, a soft smile on her face. The way she rests a hand on Victoria's shoulder has her practically melting. "You okay? That looked heated."
"I'm fine," Victoria sighs, unable to stop the way she leans into McKay's touch, just a little. It's automatic. "Santos is just….Santos."
McKay chuckles softly. "No arguments there," she sighs. "Ready to head out?"
Victoria just looks up, smiles, nods, and tries to ignore the way her heart is beating just a little bit faster.
Victoria takes a breath as she slides into the passenger side of McKay's nice little sedan, bags tossed into the back seat. It's…the car is exactly how she'd imagine it, honestly. Not that she has but…if she had. In the past. Late at night.
It just feels…cozy. Lived in. It's clean and well taken care of, but there's still books in the back seat, a duffle bag that could be either McKay's or Harrison's, loose change in the cupholder….all kinds of stuff. No dirt or trash, just…lived in.
Victoria's not used to this. Her mother's car - and her father's - are spic and span. Cleaned every weekend by someone they pay to do it, with not a thing out of place. In case they ever have to pick someone up, or go to an event, it's…they're perfect.
God, even their cars have to be fucking perfect.
"Alright," Cassie claps her hands together as she slides into her seat and buckles up. She takes a breath as she leans back, and it's almost impossible for Victoria to stop her eyes from flitting to her arms in that tanktop. Just observing. Obviously. "Where do you live? For the GPS."
She passes her phone over to Victoria, who's doing her best to fight a growing blush as she taps in the address. She knows…she knows the looks that she gets whenever people learn where she lives. Like Garcia said. Nepo baby.
"Fox Chapel?" McKay questions as Victoria hands back the phone, and she just hums. "Nice spot."
"It's my parents," Victoria stammers out. It's…it's important to her that McKay doesn't think of her as some rich nepo kid who's just here because…it's important to her. "I still live with my parents," she explains. "I'm gonna start looking for an apartment soon. After my rotation is done and I have more time, I'm going to start looking for my own place. Not in Fox Chapel. Closer to here."
McKay doesn't say anything, not right away. She's just watching, a look on her face that Victoria can't quite place. It's just….it feels fond. It's nice.
"I wasn't criticizing you," McKay offers. "I don't really get to Fox Chapel a lot. Means I get to check out how the other half lives," she smirks, coupled with the sound of the engine turning to life. "Where are you thinking of moving to? What borough?"
"I haven't…I'm still thinking about it. I just know that I want to move out. Honestly, I probably should have already," Victoria mutters.
"I can't imagine living with and working in the same place as my parents. No matter how much we love them, a little space isn't a bad thing. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?"
Victoria sighs. "Right."
She hopes that's true. That the little bit of space will help repair their relationship. That it'll make her mother like her again. But there's a bigger part of her that worries that it'll mean Shamsi will just check in on her more and more and more when she isn't right down the hall. When she can't be on top of literally every part of Victoria's life.
"What else is on your mind?"
"Uh…hm?"
"You're thinking really hard," Cassie smiles as she rests her arm on the back of Victoria's seat, looking over her shoulder as she backs out of her parking spot. It's…her arm is literally right there, and Victoria really has to get this feeling in her gut under control. "You don't have to share, but I've been told I'm a good listener."
"You are," Victoria mutters under her breath. It's meant for just herself, but she thinks Cassie heard it, the way a smile comes to her lips. "I was talking with Whitaker about…what's next. After this."
It's an easy pivot to make. She thinks Cassie could provide some insight here, and…well, talking to McKay about her mom makes her feel weird. She's not sure why, but it makes her feel off, sometimes. She doesn't like to compare the two of them in her head.
"He's doing rural medicine, right?"
"Assuming it's still an option for him. After the White House is done….fucking gutting it."
"Yeah," Cassie sighs. "If it's still an option. He'd be good at it though."
"He would. He will," Victoria smiles softly, because it's true. He'll be really fucking good at it. "But we were talking about what we were going to do and….I don't know, he was talking about mental health and how important it is and he helped me realize that maybe I want to do emergency psychiatry. I only just thought about it so I still need to do a ton more research but I think it might be…what I want to do. Next."
Cassie doesn't say anything, not right away. She's still making her way out of the parking garage, but she's got that look on her face like she's clearly mulling it over.
"That doesn't surprise me," McKay starts. "I've seen your Tiktoks. You like to give advice. And you understand why it's important to take care of yourself. God knows not everyone in the ED does."
Oh god oh god oh god oh god
"You've seen my Tiktok?!?!?!?"
Victoria wants to curl up and die. She likes making her videos and sharing her experiences and advice, but between Ogilvie and Langdon and Joy and Robby….she kind of wants to curl up and die whenever someone from work mentions them. They always talk about it like it's….like she's a kid making little home movies. But that's not what it is. That's not what she's doing. She's trying to help.
"Joy was talking about them and I was nearby," McKay offers. "I didn't tell you I knew because I assumed you didn't share it for a reason. I'm sorry for hiding that. For what it's worth, I think they're really cool ."
Victoria can't deny the absolute rush she gets when she hears McKay say that. That McKay things that she's doing something cool. Something good. That McKay's impressed.
"I don't know much about Tiktok, so I don't know what's usually on there, but your videos are really great. You give good advice. About how to deal with coworkers, stressors at work…..my point is, Victoria, is that I think you'll be great at it. I think you'll be great at whatever you do, but you have a knack for this. And, I'll admit, if it means we'll still get to see you around the ED, I'm happy for us."
Victoria's mind is still stuck on the fact that McKay thinks that she's good at this. That she's really good at this. It hits that little note that makes her heart beat faster, her stomach muscles tighten, and her lips moisten. She's not sure what it is. She's not sure she's ever felt it before. Not with….not with anyone. Certainly not because of another woman.
"I don't even know if my parents would let me ," Victoria mutters under her breath. She knows she's trying to talk herself out of it. "It might be the one thing they respect less than the ED, but Robby said he thinks I could do it and that might literally be the only nice thing I've heard him say today, so I….I dunno. It might not even be some….."
"Is it something you want?"
"I…what?"
"With all due respect to your mom, Victoria, it doesn't fucking matter what she thinks," McKay cuts in, and….McKay rarely swears. It kind of stops Victoria in her tracks, to hear Cassie talking that fiercely about her. "And if you ever need someone to talk to her, I'd be happy to. But it's really something you want to do…you should do it. If Robby's right about one thing, he's right about this."
"And if you need a letter of recommendation, I know plenty of people who would love to write you one. Present company included," McKay smiles softly, hand patting Victoria's shoulder as the other rests on the wheel, driving them smoothly down the road.
It's a lot.
If there's one thing that Victoria Javadi knows about Cassie McKay is that she cares and being hit with the full force of it is always a little overwhelming. Especially when….okay, Victoria wouldn't say that she's needy for praise, but she can see her own flaws. She understands that Santos isn't completely wrong when she says 'praise kink'.
Whatever. Santos says a lot of things.
"Thanks," Victoria smiles instead, fingers twiddling in her lap. "I'll probably do some more research before I bring it up, but…thank you."
"Anytime, kiddo."
Again, Victoria feels her stomach drop out, just a little, when Cassie calls her kiddo. She just doesn't know how to bring it up that she doesn't like being called that without sounding like a creep.
So instead, she pivots.
"Do you um…do you have any plans? For the rest of the night?"
McKay laughs, but why, Victoria can't quite tell. "No…no I don't think so," she sighs. "I was going to meet up with this guy later but I think that ship's sailed."
Oh
Victoria doesn't like the feeling that roils around in her gut when she hears that. She hates even more that way that she can't help but pry. "Where were you going?"
"There's this showing at an art gallery on 40th and Butler that we made plans for. We were going to meet….probably an hour ago . Then get drinks, back to one of our places, and….what?" McKay asks. Victoria's not sure what stopped it, but she's never been good at hiding her emotions. "Harrison's with Chad, and I'm not that old. I can still have a hookup."
"Yep," Victoria chirps . She hates how high pitched and fucking child-like it sounds. "You definitely can. That's no…that's not ….I wasn't trying to imply anything, at all, I just…"
"It's okay, Vic," McKay thankfully saves Victoria from combusting. "We don't usually talk about that kinda stuff. I get it. Like if Robby started talking about his sex life."
"Ugh…yeah, I don't need to think about that…ever. Ever."
"You and me both," Cassie chuckles. "I think I probably missed my shot though, so it's a book, bath and bed for me."
"That sounds nice," Victoria sighs, leaning back just a little bit and closing her eyes again. "I'll probably just end up doomscrolling on Tiktok until I fall asleep."
"That sounds….fun?"
"It beats questions about what I could have done better to help Mrs. Burns," Victoria grumbles, picking at her nails again. Or she does, until McKay's hand is in her lap and lightly prying her fingers apart.
"That sounds tough," McKay sighs. "There's always a good time to think about how we could do better, but I don't know if it's right after a long shift." Victoria finds herself agreeing with that, but she can't voice it because she feels like her fingertips are vibrating. "Victoria….listen. If you need a quiet night, I have a free couch. I can't promise it's as nice as your bed but…that's not really the point."
Victoria's not sure she's strong enough to have this conversation. She's still not sure why it feels like her heart is going to implode whenever McKay is just so nice and when she sees Victoria. It's so confusing that she just wants to…she can't talk to her mom about it, but she…
Not for the first time, Victoria wishes she had someone to talk to outside of McKay, because she's obviously not an option. And now that she knows that McKay watches her TikTok, she will not be asking for help on there either. Maybe she needs an anonymous Reddit account or something, because…because she needs to talk to someone.
"That's um…that's really nice of you. But I…I should probably get home. My mom will um…I should probably go home."
Cassie doesn't say anything, not right away. A quick look over makes it clear that she's thinking about something, the way her jaw is clenched and her fingers are drumming lightly against the wheel. "Okay. But it's a standing offer, yeah? You deserve to have a safe space, if you don't always have that at home. So just…if you ever need it, okay?"
Victoria's not really sure what to do. She's so tired, and Cassie's being so nice and she's so confused by the feelings roiling around in her that she can't really do anything but nod her head and mutter a quiet "thank you".
Cassie smiles in return, clearly sensing the conversation is over. So instead she just nods and gives Victoria a light pat on the knee. "You'll figure it out, Victoria. You're incredible, I don't think people tell you that enough."
Victoria's so fucked
It's about ten minutes later that they pull up outside of Victoria's parents house, and she blushes a little at the way that Cassie whistles. "Jesus," she mutters, and Victoria wants to die inside.
It's a nice house. She knows that. It's nice even for Fox Chapel, and there's a reason that Cassie's the first and only person in the ED who's seen it. It makes Victoria feel silly, because she's only twenty years old and it's not her place, and it'll never be her place, but it makes her feel like even more of an extension of her parents. Another indicator that she doesn't deserve what she's got. Like Garcia said. Nepo Baby.
"Thank you for driving me," she offers as she reaches into the backseat to grab her bag. "And thank you for the um…thanks for listening."
"Anytime Victoria," Cassie smiles as she sits back in her seat. Victoria brushes against her arm as she's grabbing her stuff, and she can't help the way her stomach clenches again. "I'll see you our next shared shift?"
"Yep!" Victoria chirps before she's quickly out the door and waving goodbye. It's coupled with a deep breath as she looks up at her parent's house with the backdrop of McKay's sedan driving away. The house is….it's what you'd expect if you heard what her parent's jobs were, Victoria guesses.
Big four bedroom house - for whenever there's guests - five bathrooms, a study, gates all the way around and a code to get in. Victoria suddenly feels incredibly silly bringing McKay here. She can't wait to get her own apartment. Something that's hers, and that she's worked for. Somewhere she can bring friends (if she had any).
She quickly inputs her code to unlock the gate, and on the way takes a quick look in the garage. Her mom's car is in there - the one they drove into work today, against Victoria's better judgment - so they're both home. Which is…Victoria was hoping she'd be able to make it to her room and pass out without a long conversation about her many failings.
It's one of the reasons she usually takes the bus into work. Today though….She caved, because Pittsburgh's public transit was having lot of trouble with the increased traffic on July Fourth. She should have just dealt with it.
Victoria's as quiet as possible as she enters. She does her best to not make peep as she unlocks the front entrance and quietly shuts it. She toes her shoes off at the door, putting them in the shoe rack, and tiptoes her way past the living room and to the stairs and tries to make her way up to her bedroom before….
"Victoria."
Of course.
A quick look into the living room lets Victoria know her mom's there, but her dad's nowhere to be seen. She's just sitting on the couch, a medical book in her lap, dressed up just enough that Victoria figures they must have gone out somewhere when they left the hospital. "You haven't been answering my texts."
"Sorry," Victoria cringes. "I haven't been checking my phone. I was…."
"It was on do not disturb," Eileen Shamsi cuts in, and Victoria just cringes all over again. She should have known that her mother would have noticed. She notices everything that Victoria does wrong. "If you expect us to trust you, that involves being able to handle difficult conversations. Not hiding from them."
"Right. Sorry. I was just…"
"I talked to Garcia about your case. I'd like to discuss it with you and what you did wrong."
No no no no no no
"Can we do that tomorrow, Mom? Please," Victoria pleads. "I'm really tired and I just want to go to bed. We can talk about Mrs. Burns and all of the many things I did wrong tomorrow."
Her mom doesn't say anything, not right away. She just stares, and Victoria feels inadequate all over again. "I suppose," Dr. Shamsi eventually relents, eyes flitting back to her book. Victoria takes that to mean that the conversation is over, turning to take her leave. "How did you get home? Public transit isn't safe at this time of night, especially on July Fourth."
"Doctor McKay drove me."
"Oh. You two seem very…close."
Okay, what is that supposed to mean?
"Goodnight, mom."
She doesn't even bother to say 'I love you'. She knows what response she'll get.
Nothing.
Victoria decides to take McKay's advice. She doesn't have a book, but she draws herself a bath, grabs her Sonos, puts on some Olivia Rodrigo and sinks into the nice warm soothing water. It's comforting, so so comforting and not for the first time Victoria's thankful for McKay's advice.
Her heart does that pitter patter again.
She really doesn't know what that means, but Victoria knows that she has to deal with it. She doesn't….she thought she was straight. Not because of any particular reason, but just because…she figured everyone thinks they're straight until they find out they aren't. She liked Mateo - she still likes him but she doesn't like him - and she's thought guys were hot, but she's never really had the chance to think too much on it because, obviously, no one in her med school classes was interested in even talking to her.
So she just…she figures that must be what this is. Why her heart does that pitter patter whenever McKay….god, that's so fucked up. McKay's being nice to her and kind to her and teaching her and Victoria's being a fucking perv thinking about her arms and how pretty she is and now nice and sweet she is and that's how you should treat someone you care about and…
She's not an idiot. She knows that McKay gives her praise and positive reinforcement in the way that she's always wished someone had. She knows that's true. But she also knows that she thinks McKay is pretty and how good she looked tonight and…its's so fucked up.
Victoria has to deal with it. She has to learn how to function and not be weird.
She needs to talk to someone about it.
About…all of it.
She hates that there's literally only one person who comes to mind.
July 4th 2026 11:40 PM
Victoria Javadi
Heyyyy Dennis
Dennis Whitaker (Work)
….
Hey Victoria
Everything okay?
Victoria Javadi
Yep! Everything's perfect!
I was just wondering if maybe u have Santos' number?
And if u could share it?
Dennis Whitaker (Work)
Yeah, I have it. We do live together. Kinda weird if I didn't
Dennis Whitaker (Work) Shared a Contact - Trinity Santos
Do I wanna know why you need it?
Victoria Javadi
Probably not! Thanks!
How's the farm? And Amy?
Any 'farm benefits'?
I didn't know u were such a messy bitch
Dennis Whitaker (Work)
They're good. Theo's in bed so we're just watching her neighbour's fireworks
We got back late so I'm saving chores for the morning
NO FARM BENEFITS
AND I'M NOT
Victoria Javadi
That sounds really nice
Not the chores part (ugh) or the mess (fun!). The fireworks
Can I ask u a question?
And please please please keep it between us?
Dennis Whitaker (Work)
Of course
As long as it's not anything bad? Like you didn't commit a crime or anything
Victoria Javadi
Now I know what u really think of me
But no! Definitely not that!
It's not about work either
I was just wondering how you deal with people talking about u and Amy?
Like does it bother u?
And I'm not judging! I know ur a good guy. Just curious
Dennis Whitaker (Work)
Oh okay. That's not what I expected
I dunno, really
It can be a little annoying, but in the end, it doesn't really matter
If I'm happy and Amy's happy, then that's what's important
Not that Amy and I are together! I'm just helping her!
Victoria Javadi
I believe u Dennis
(kinda)
Thank you though. That helps
A lot
Dennis Whitaker (Work)
Anytime
Kinda cryptic, but anytime
If you don't wanna share what it's about, that's cool though!
We can always chat if you wanna next time we have a shift together?
Victoria Javadi
Maybe, yeah
I gotta go, but thanks for Santos' number! And the advice
Have a good night!!!!
Victoria takes a breath as she leans back, phone in hand. She doesn't know if she'll take Dennis up on it but…he's helpful. He's really easy to talk to and he gives good advice.
Unfortunately, she can't talk to him about this. He means well, and he probably would help, but he'd be a bit…weird about it, she thinks. She'd rather talk to someone who might have first hand experience about potentially liking women and figuring out that you like women. Someone who might even have experience in a relationship with an older woman.
God, Victoria feels so silly. She just worked a fifteen hour shift in an Emergency Department and now here she is worrying about which coworker to text about how to know if you have a potentially inappropriate homosexual crush.
Still, she has to go through with this now.
She steels herself, and types out a message to her new contact.
July 5th 2026 12:15 AM
Victoria Javadi
Hi Santos!
It's Victoria
Javadi
From work
Santos (Work)
Oh hey Crash
Did Hucklefuck give u my number?
Victoria Javadi
Maybe. Maybe not
I was just wondering if u were around sometime soon?
There's something I wanna talk about
Santos (Work)
…..
The fuck is this
Since when do we talk
Is this code for u trying to get laid?
Because ur not really my type
Victoria Javadi
Ugh gross
I would never
Ur way too toxic
It's a personal thing. I don't wanna talk about it over text
Santos (Work)
Uh okay. Cryptic much
It's not weird shit is it?
Cause u child proteges r probably freaks
All repressed n shit
Victoria Javadi
U think about me that much?
It's not weird. I just….want to talk to someone and ur literally the only girl my age that I know
No offense to Samira but I think u have more life experience
Santos (Work)
True
Love Mohan but girl has to live a little
Okay Crash, colour me intrigued
I have plans tomorrow but I have a shift Monday
Wanna meet up after?
Victoria Javadi
That works! I'll hangout in the park and u can text me when ur done
Thanks Santos
Santos (Work)
No prob. Just girls supporting girls
FYI I'm saving uas Crash in my contacts
For ur pic, I'm thinking I'll take a screenshot of one of urTiktoks
U look cute in some of them
Who's this problematic coworker you keep posting about?
Victoria Javadi
:)
See you Monday!
Victoria quickly sets her phone down and settles back into the warm water
On one hand, Trinity Santos drives her up the wall. She's mean, she's abrasive, she's so angry all the time, and sometimes she's just cruel to be cruel. But….even Victoria can see that there is a part of her, buried under all that that would want to help, just a little bit.
Victoria doesn't think she'd be the type to judge. She's going to have to deal with teasing and a little bit of meanness, sure, but she knows that Trinity won't question Victoria's potential sexuality or….things like that. She might not be a girl's girl but she's not a homophobe. Which, given Victoria's small circle, is good enough. It's the best she's got.
She can't stay in the path much longer, getting prunier by the second. That, and she won't be able to avoid her mother's quizzing forever and she should probably get some sleep so she's not half asleep when she gets hit with questions in the morning.
So with that, Victoria steps out of her bath, towels off and drains out the water. As soon as she's out, she can feel the desire to just crash (ugh) wash over her, and her eyes are trying their best to flutter shut and stay that way.
She should…as she gets into her pajamas and dries her hair off, she feels herself drawn back to her phone. She should send one more text before she goes to bed. Would like her thoughts before she falls asleep to be of one person in particular.
So she does just that.
July 5th 2026 12:50 AM
Victoria Javadi
Thanks for taking driving me home tonight
*last night
It meant a lot
July 5th 2026 7:10 AM
Cassie McKay
Anytime Vic
My offer still stands. If you ever you need a space to think, let me know
The following morning, when she sees the texts, Victoria can't help the wide smile that comes to her face.