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Gideon was thinking about mating.
It was hard not to when Camilla and Palamedes kept coming to see her smelling so strongly of each other, and of their other mate Dulcie. She had started noticing the small humans that came to see her show. She wanted to take care of a small angry penguin with her beloved, Harrowhark. But no matter how many times she tried to communicate this to Camilla and Palamedes by barking at them, they did not understand.
Perhaps it was because no matter how much Camilla and Palamedes seemed to mate with each other, they had never produced offspring. Gideon didn’t mind, because having a small human to take care of would probably mean she wouldn’t see them as often, and they were her best friends.
Gideon was impatient, because today was a day she got to see Harrowhark. Dulcie was coming with them so they were waiting for her. Gideon understood the desire to have one’s true love with you, but it was still hard to wait. When Dulcie arrived, Gideon realized she had brought a friend, and that Dulcie’s friend was carrying a baby human!
Gideon barked excitedly at her new friend and her baby human. She clapped her flippers together and the baby human laughed. Gideon was so delighted she spun in a circle.
“Gideon, this is Comma and baby Apostrophe,” Palamedes said. Gideon thought those were strange names for humans, but it didn’t matter. Comma and Apostrophe were coming with them to see her beloved! Maybe she could show everyone what a great provider she would be for a baby penguin.
Gideon tried to walk extra fast on the way to Harrow's enclosure, but Camilla kept her from running too far off with a steady supply of fish. Camilla was the best.
When Gideon saw her beloved, not even fish could keep her in check. She bounded across the room and nuzzled her nose into Harrow's feathers, enthusiastically enough that Harrow squawked at her. But Harrow didn't back away. She ruffled her feathers in mock indignation, but wiggled herself down comfortably against Gideon's flank.
“Oh, they really are friends!” Comma said.
“Oh no,” Dulcie said. “They are in love.”
Gideon barked happily and nuzzled Harrow's head again with her nose, right between her angry eyebrows. Comma laughed. “You know what, you're absolutely right.” Baby Apostrophe laughed.
That reminded Gideon that she wanted to show Harrow what a good job she would do caring for a baby penguin. She scooted away to the center of the room and lifted a flipper to wave at Apostrophe, turning her head back over her shoulder to make sure Harrow was watching.
“Can you wave at Gideon?” Comma asked. Apostrophe put her little baby hand out and waved. Gideon clapped. Apostrophe clapped back.
“Aw, Gideon is putting on a private show just for you,” Palamedes said.
“I think she's putting on a show for Harrow too,” Camilla said.
Camilla got out a ball and tossed it to Gideon to balance on her nose because she was a total bro. She even rewarded her with a fish. Gideon loved getting rewarded for something she wanted to do anyway.
Harrow began to inch forward slowly, interested in Gideon's obvious interest in the baby human. Gideon was very excited. Her beloved would be confident in her ability to delight babies.
Gideon waddled up and sat down right in front of her new baby friend. She covered her eyes with her flippers for a second, then opened them up again.
“Peek-ooh!” Apostrophe squealed with delight.
Harrow had hopped closer to see what was going on. The humans were talking amongst themselves, but Gideon ignored them. She barked happily at Harrow several times, her voice echoing in the room.
Then something terrible happened. The baby human began to cry. Harrow flinched and hopped back. Gideon barked a few more times and spun in a circle. Maybe she hadn't been loud enough. Apostrophe only cried harder. Gideon didn't understand. She was still just as charming and hilarious as she had been ten minutes ago! What happened?
“I think she's over stimulated,” Comma said, “and she's not a fan of having to hold still.”
“Aw, unfortunately it's not a good idea to crawl on the floor in here,” Dulcie said seriously to Apostrophe.
Comma stood up and shushed Apostrophe, but she would not be sated. Harrow squawked in dismay and hopped into the corner, fluffing up her feathers and trying to pull her head down into her shoulders.
Gideon agreed that Apostrophe was being disappointingly loud. She wasn't sure what she'd done wrong. Baby humans could be very unpredictable. She stopped trying to fix the humans and went to her beloved’s rescue, wrapping a flipper around her so she could muffle the sounds of the baby's cries.
Dulcie and Comma said goodbye and headed out the door. Suddenly, it was quiet. Gideon felt Harrow relax all at once under her flipper.
“Sorry Harrow,” Camilla said, pulling out a small fish for the penguin. “I guess Gideon got a little overexcited.”
Harrow fluffed up her feathers and squawked, taking the fish from Camilla.
Gideon wondered if baby penguins were quieter than baby humans. She was glad she'd had a chance to show off her parenting skills for Harrow, but maybe they weren't quite ready to be parents. But that was okay. They had time. Gideon and Harrow were going to be in love forever.