Chapter Text
Walter skedaddled through the long ahh hallway sonic the hedgehog style. The cops had uncovered his secret laboratory for the 7th time this week (it was Monday) and he needed to find somewhere to hide so he'd be able to plan another relocation operation instead of going to jail for all eternity.
He stumbled upon a random closet that was just sitting there chilling in the hallway. This is it. His chance to hide! Surely the cops would never think to open the closet door!
So he went for it. He epically pushed the closet door open and walked inside.
He was supposed to close the door behind him so the cops wouldn't see him inside. But alas, he could not, for he was now falling in pitch black darkness, the door becoming further and further away from him.
Well crap. Now an open door is practically an invitation to investigate the room behind!
Walter rotated rapidly while screeching as he continued to descend into the darkness.
Eventually he hit the ground face first, the impact making the metal pipe falling sound. Now he was on solid rock. Why was all this inside a closet, exactly?
He got up and looked around. Everything looked so strange, like it was another world. And it was also dark. Almost like some sort of....... dark world.
In the distance he saw a comically large pillar of darkness flowing endlessly into the sky, as well as what looked like a town. So he began journeying there.
Meanwhile, back in the light world...
"..no sign of anyone here." One of the cops said after having poked their head into the closet. None of them bothered to investigate further and just continued searching through the hallways.
Huh. Guess he really won't be getting caught this time after all.
Later, Walter reached the town. It seemed rather lively for it's size, filled with tons of odd creatures he didn't recognize.
One creature in particular, a fluffy little goat dude, smiled and waved when he saw Walter.
"Hello there! Are you a newcomer?" He asked.
"Yes I am, what the sigma is this place" Walter replied.
"This is Castle Town! Welcome to our lovely home! My name is Ralsei! I can give you a tour if you want!" Ralsei said.
"Ok sure" Walter said, still not sure what was going on.
Ralsei then led Walter around castle town and showed him stuff.
"This is the stage! It started out as a place for the heroes to perform, but now there's other singers who do concerts here too!"
"This is the party dojo! It's where people beat each other up for funsies!"
"This is the restaurant! It's, uhh... well, surely you know what a restaurant is, right?"
...and so on. The author never really looked that closely at castle town in game before and therefore does not know what all of the local tourist attractions are like.
"Okay ralsei how have you gone this ENTIRE tour without addressing the elephant in the room" Walter asked
"Huh? What elephant?" Ralsei titled his head. "Oh, the big castle? That's actually our last stop!"
"No, no! Not the castle! That big ominous pillar of darkness fountaining out of the floor!"
"OH, the grand fountain!! That's the thing that gives this world form!"
"...what"
"Sorry! You're probably not familiar with the concept of dark worlds yet! Let me explain!"
And so ralsei gave Walter a 30 minute long explanation about dark worlds, dark fountains, and darkners.
"Ok cool. But can I eat the fountain"
"Uhhhh??" Ralsei was now even more confused. "I don't think anyone's tried eating a dark fountain before.. I don't know what would happen. Also please don't do anything to the grand fountain it's kind of the only thing keeping this town in existence"
Before Walter had the chance to get mad at ralsei for not telling him he could eat the grand fountain, Kris and Susie appeared.
"Yo who dis" Susie said
"I am Walter white. I am from Albuquerque new Mexico"
"hi" Kris said
"Who are these people bro" Walter asked
"These are two of the three heroes I've been telling you about! The third one may or may not be me- anyways let's go to the castle
After some boring introduction stuff Walter was brought to the castle. It sure was one of the castles of all time, but with being able to see the grand fountain up close, it was all he could think about.
There was something special in that, there just had to be! He could tell just by looking at it! But ralsei kept stopping him from getting closer.
So he went along with the rest of the tour, pretending to pay attention, and waited till everyone was asleep. Then, he approached the fountain, with a test tube in his hand.
He collected some of the fountain and quickly closed the test tube, then ran for the hills back to the outskirts of Castle town.
When he found a secluded area of the grey boring rock place he set up camp. He has some of his old lab equipment in his back pocket (don't ask how) in case something like this ever happened. Most of his stuff was stuck in the light world getting confiscated by the police but luckily he had suitable equipment to analyze the fountain sample with.
After a few hours of what was basically just that one meme template of Walter, he made a scientific breakthrough.
According to his calculations, the fountain contained a very small amount of a chemical compound that could induce hallucinations and relaxation. Normally it's too small of an amount to actually cause an effect, but if he could find a way to get large amounts of fountain and concentrate it, he could invent a brand new drug.
He grabbed a couple of buckets and immediately ran back to the fountain to get some more samples.
It was hard to do it without waking anyone up, but he managed to get back to his camp with the goods.
He cooked the fountain in a large industrial cooking pot (with the lid on so the still-fountaining fountain wouldn't fountain out of the pot and into the sky) and waited until it was mostly all evaporated and nothing remained in the pot except for a dark blue syrup.
He analyzed the substance again and sure enough, it consisted almost entirely of the compound he had discovered.
Now all he needed was an efficient way to mass produce the stuff.
And also some customers.