Chapter Text
A week after the reunion Seungcheol was in his clinic, the last appointment of the day finally over.
He was ready to close up and maybe grab that coffee he’d been craving since lunch.
His nurse poked her head in “Doctor, I know you’re done for the day but there’s a new patient.”
“That’s okay” Seungcheol nodded. “Send them in.”
She nodded and disappeared.
Seungcheol rubbed both hands over his face before settling back into his chair. His eyes burned.
He was actually thinking about coffee so intensely that the door opening barely registered.
“Dr. Cheollie.”
No way.
Seungcheol looked up. His brain immediately forgot what coffee was.
Jeonghan stood in the doorway wearing an apologetic smile.
“uh…” he said awkwardly. “Um... it's Yoon Jeonghan. From the reunion.”
As if he needed the reminder.
As if Seungcheol had somehow forgotten the man who'd accidentally proposed to him with someone else's ring seven days ago.
“Yeah I know.” he smiled. “What are you doing here?”
Jeonghan glanced down.
“You...” Seungcheol pointed toward the little girl hiding behind his leg. “...have a daughter?”
“No!”
Seungcheol tilted his head toward the child.
“I'm legally obligated to ask...did you steal her?”
The little girl raised her hand. “Yes.”
Jeonghan gasped “Oh my God ! No! You little brat! I didn't steal you ! Your mother left you to me!
The girl coughed a couple of times, looking small and tired
Seungcheol noticed. “How about you both come have a seat first?”
Jeonghan nodded “Right. Sorry.”
Jeonghan walked over with her, carefully helping the little girl onto the small chair beside Seungcheol’s desk.
He sat down in the other chair.
“This is my 6 year old niece” he explained, voice a little rushed. “Her parents are on a business trip for a week. She was fine yesterday, but this morning she started feeling a little sick. I panicked because I don't know the first thing about taking care of a child. I made her warm porridge, called my sister about seventeen times until she finally answered, gave her the medicine she told me to, kept checking her temperature every 5 minutes—”
“Every 5 minutes?”
“I may have overdone it.”
“A little.”
“But then this evening she started coughing more and...” He scratched his cheek, suddenly looking embarrassed. “I thought of you.… so um… here we are”
“You did the right thing.”
“Really?”
“Mhm.”
“Okay.”
He looked so relieved that Seungcheol almost reached over to reassure him before remembering he was technically supposed to examine the patient first.
He turned toward the little girl.
“Hi there, kid” he said softly. “What’s your name?”
The girl sniffled but smiled shyly. “Nabi”
“Hi, Nabi” He smiled. “I'm Doctor Seungcheol.”
“I know.”
“You do?”
“Uncle hannie talked about you.”
Seungcheol slowly looked at Jeonghan.
Jeonghan's soul left his body.
“What exactly,” Seungcheol asked very calmly, “did Uncle hannie say about me?”
“He said we’re gonna meet a handsome doctor called Dr. Seungcheol who likes to be called Dr.Cheollie”
Jeonghan laughed. “Haha! Kids, right? They just... make things up.”
Nabi frowned. “You also said—”
“Nope!” He covered her mouth. “We're done talking.”
“Mmph!”
Seungcheol bit the inside of his cheek.
This man.
“I see” he said.
Jeonghan refused to make eye contact. “You don't see anything.”
“Oh, I think I do.”
“You don't.”
“I've learned quite a lot, actually.”
Jeonghan looked so red. It was dangerously cute.
Seungcheol picked up his stethoscope before his smile became impossible to hide.
“Alright, Miss Nabi.” He leaned forward. “Can I borrow you for a minute?”
“Will it hurt?”
“Not at all.”
“You promise?”
“I pinky promise” Seungcheol smiled and hooked his finger around hers.
She grinned. “Okay.”
He listened carefully to her breathing, moving the stethoscope from her chest to her back.
“Big deep breath for me.”
She inhaled dramatically.
“Another one.”
An even bigger inhale.
“So good.”
She grinned.
“Can you open your mouth?”
“Aaaaah.”
“Very impressive.”
“She practices” Jeonghan muttered.
“I do not!”
“You've been yelling at cartoons all morning.”
“I was helping.”
“With what?”
“The princess.”
Seungcheol laughed quietly before checking her throat. “Does it hurt when you swallow?”
“A tiny bit.”
“Okay. Any tummy ache?”
“No.”
“Headache?”
“A little.”
“Hmm.”
He slipped the thermometer beneath her tongue. “Keep this there.”
She obediently sat perfectly still.
Jeonghan, meanwhile, looked anything but still.
His legs were bouncing, he crossed his arms, then uncrossed them, then leaned closer, then stepped back.
He looked like an anxious golden retriever forced to watch someone else hold the leash.
Seungcheol sighed. “You can breathe Jeonghan”
“I am breathing.”
“Barely.”
“I don't know how parents survive.”
“You're not the parent.”
“I know.”
“You're more nervous than most parents.”
“I also know.”
The thermometer beeped.
Seungcheol checked it. “Low fever.”
Jeonghan immediately straightened. “Is that bad?”
“No.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“Really sure?”
“Yes.”
“Like actually—”
“Jeonghan.”
“…Yes?”
“She's okay.”
The words landed like a switch being flipped. All the tension drained from Jeonghan's shoulders.
“Oh.”
Seungcheol smiled reassuringly and wrote the prescription
“It looks like a mild viral infection and I don't see anything worrying. Plenty of water, rest, keep giving the fever medicine as directed if the fever goes up, and she'll probably be back to terrorizing you in a day or two.”
He gave Jeonghan the prescription.
Nabi's eyes followed the colorful sheet of stickers sitting on Seungcheol's desk.
He noticed.
“You know” he said, pretending to think very hard, “I think you've been a brave patient.”
Nabi sat up a little straighter. “I have?”
“Mhm. You listened really well, you took big deep breaths, and you didn't complain even once.”
“I don't like complaining.”
“I can tell.”
He peeled a shiny butterfly sticker from the sheet and held it between two fingers.
“Which means you've earned one.”
Nabi's entire face lit up. “The butterfly?”
“The butterfly.”
“For me?”
“I wasn't planning on keeping it for myself.”
She giggled.
He leaned over and carefully stuck it onto the back of her palm.
“There.”
Nabi looked down at it like she'd just been handed treasure. “So pretty...”
“It matches your sweater.”
She gently patted it. “I'm gonna show Mommy.”
“I think she'll be very impressed.”
“And Daddy.”
“He'll probably be impressed too.”
“And Grandma.”
“Definitely Grandma.”
Jeonghan watched the two of them with a smile. “You know she didn’t even do anything extraordinary to earn a sticker. I mean I had to do a lot of cheerleading to get a number.”
“A number you never used.” Seungcheol pointed out.
Jeonghan looked away.
Seungcheol cleared his throat. “Besides, I think she deserves the sticker cause some kids cry before I even touch the stethoscope.”
“I would've cried too.”
“You?”
“When I was six? Absolutely.”
“I don't know...” Seungcheol smiled. “I feel like you would've tried negotiating.”
“I was a very good child.”
“Mommy said you’re not” Nabi said.
“Your mommy doesn’t know what she’s talking about”
“You also don't eat vegetables.”
“I eat vegetables.”
“You picked all the carrots out yesterday.”
Jeonghan groaned and covered his face with both hands. This is my life now. Getting exposed by a 6 year old in front of the guy I almost kissed last week. Perfect. Amazing. I want to melt into the floor.
Seungcheol laughed quietly “She’s got you there”
Jeonghan peeked through his fingers. “You’re both mean to me.”
Nabi giggled again and leaned against Seungcheol’s arm like they were best friends now.
“Doctor Cheollie is nice. You’re just silly, Uncle Hannie.”
She already likes him. Of course she does. Everyone likes him. I like him too much. This is dangerous.
Nabi looked at her sticker and back at Seungcheol. “Can I keep it forever?”
Seungcheol smiled at her. “It'll probably come off when you have a bath tonight.”
Her little face fell. “Oh.”
“But that's okay.”
“Why?”
“Because next time you're brave, you'll get another one.”
She grinned. “A different one?”
“Mhm.”
“With a bunny?”
“If we have one.”
“What about a dinosaur?”
“I think we have dinosaurs.”
“And a rainbow?”
“We might.”
Nabi nodded to herself, apparently reassured by the clinic's sticker inventory.
There wasn't a trace of impatience in Seungcheol. Not the fake, customer-service patience people put on because they had to. He spoke to Nabi as though every question deserved an answer, no matter how small.
Jeonghan hadn't realized he'd been watching until Seungcheol glanced up.
Their eyes met for barely a second.
Caught.
No, not caught.
Why would you be caught?
People are allowed to look at other people.
Except he'd probably been staring.
Definitely staring.
Wonderful.
He looked away first, pretending to examine the prescription in his hands with intense concentration. It was upside down.
He discreetly turned it around.
“You'll give her the medicine after dinner,” Seungcheol said, as though he hadn't noticed any of that. Maybe he hadn't. Hopefully he hadn't. “And keep encouraging her to drink water, even if it's just a few sips at a time.”
Jeonghan nodded “Right.”
“If her fever goes up or if she seems much sleepier than usual, give me a call…you already have my professional as well as personal number.”
Jeonghan thought about the business card.
The one currently living inside his wallet because throwing it into a drawer had somehow felt... disrespectful? No. That wasn't the word. Suspicious? Weirdly sentimental? He hadn't examined the reasoning too closely because then he'd have to admit he'd looked at the stupid bunny doodle more times than any sane adult should.
“I...” He cleared his throat. “Yeah.”
“Alright,” Seungcheol said. “That's everything. The nurse outside will help you with the bill, and you can collect the medicines from the pharmacy downstairs.”
Jeonghan nodded. “Okay.”
He took Nabi’s hand. “Ready?”
“Ready.”
Jeonghan looked back at Seungcheol, giving him an awkward little wave that somehow matched the rest of him.
“Okayyy... bye.”
Seungcheol smiled. “Bye.”
Nabi immediately copied the wave. “Bye, Dr. Cheollie!”
He laughed. “Bye, little butterfly.”
She giggled and then they walked out together.
Seungcheol stayed seated for a while after they left, just staring at the door. For the past week he had checked his phone a thousand times, hoping for even one message from Jeonghan. He had told Seokmin he would be fine if nothing came. That he would just be grateful for that one night at the reunion.
He'd gotten an evening he never thought he'd have, a chance to know the person behind ten years of memories, and maybe that was enough.
Apparently, his heart hadn't attended that conversation.
His heart had spent the week checking his phone like an idiot.
Eventually he stood up, closed up the clinic, said goodbye to the nurse, and stepped outside.
The coffee shop right next to the building was calling his name. He needed caffeine badly after a long day.
He walked in and froze mid-step.
Jeonghan and Nabi were sitting at a corner table.
Nabi looked up first. “Hiiii Dr. Cheollieee!”
Jeonghan’s head snapped up, eyes wide with shock. “Cheolli—I mean, Seungcheol ! Hey!”
Seungcheol pointed at Nabi’s drink. “That better not be cold.”
“It’s hot choco milk” she said proudly.
Seungcheol smiled. “Okay.”
He nodded at Jeonghan, then went to the counter to order his usual coffee to go. He paid and waited, trying to act normal even though his pulse was doing something ridiculous.
Suddenly Jeonghan appeared beside him.
“h-hey” Jeonghan said.
“Hey” Seungcheol replied, keeping his voice steady.
“I… uh… were you expecting me to contact you after the reunion?” Jeonghan asked, shifting from foot to foot.
Seungcheol shrugged. “You said you wanted my number to contact me and then you never did.”
Jeonghan’s ears turned pink. “I wanted to text you but then I couldn’t think of a topic to talk about. Fortunately Nabi got sick and I had your card—”
Seungcheol raised an eyebrow. “Fortunately?”
“UNfortunately!” Jeonghan corrected quickly, waving his hands. “Yeah. Sad. Really sad she got sick.”
Seungcheol chuckled. “You didn’t get her sick on purpose or anything, right?”
“NO !” Jeonghan said, looking horrified.
Seungcheol smiled. “Good.”
The barista handed him his coffee. He thanked her, then turned back to Jeonghan.
“I’m gonna go now. Take care.”
Jeonghan hesitated, biting his lip. “If… um… if you have a few minutes to spare, you can join our table. We can have coffee together.”
Seungcheol looked at him for a second, heart doing a flip.
“Okay”
Jeonghan blinked. It was almost as if he'd been bracing himself for a polite excuse. He looked genuinely relieved when none came.
“Really?”
“Mhm.”
“I mean... you're not tired? You just finished work.”
“I did.” Seungcheol lifted his coffee with a small smile. “But I was going to sit down somewhere with this anyway.”
“Oh.”
Jeonghan nodded once, then immediately looked like he regretted making him explain himself.
“I didn't mean like... I wasn't trying to guilt you into staying. You can absolutely say no. I just thought...” He rubbed the back of his neck, searching for words. “Well, Nabi wanted hot chocolate, and I figured we'd sit here for a few minutes before heading home. Then you walked in and... I don't know. I thought maybe it'd be nice.”
It was such an ordinary invitation.
No grand confession or elaborate excuse. Just I thought maybe it'd be nice.
Somehow that made it much harder for Seungcheol to look away.
“I think it'd be nice too,” he admitted.
“Okay. Good.” Jeonghan smiled shyly.
They walked back to the table together, Jeonghan a step ahead, pushing the chair out with his foot before realizing what he was doing and awkwardly pretending he'd only been moving it out of the way. Seungcheol noticed. He also noticed the way Jeonghan seemed to notice that he'd noticed.
He's overthinking again.
It was almost fascinating how quickly Jeonghan could embarrass himself over absolutely nothing.
Nabi looked up the moment they reached the table.
“Doctor! You're staying!”
“For a little while.”
She smiled proudly and lifted her mug with both hands. “I have marshmallows in my drink.”
“I can see that,” Seungcheol said, smiling back as he sat down. “They look so pretty and yummy”
“There were lots.” She leaned closer and lowered her voice. “Uncle Hannie stole few”
“I took one.” Jeonghan sat in his seat.
“Two” Nabi corrected, looking at Seungcheol again with big innocent eyes. “He always steals my snacks, Doctor. Can you scold him?”
Seungcheol folded his hands on the table and looked at Jeonghan. “Mr. Yoon. As her doctor, I have to advise against stealing snacks from 6 year olds. It’s a serious crime”
Jeonghan pouted and looked away. “It was a big pink one? What am I supposed to do? Not steal it?”
There it was again.
That stupid, completely unintentional thing Jeonghan did.
He'd spent the entire appointment fussing over Nabi like a worried parent, apologizing every other sentence because he thought he was bothering everyone around him. Then, the second the panic disappeared, he somehow became... this. Sulking because he'd been accused of marshmallow theft by a child.
It shouldn't have been this endearing.
It really shouldn't.
Seungcheol had seen Jeonghan embarrass himself in about fifteen different ways over the course of two meetings now, and somehow every single one made him seem more approachable than the impossibly popular boy Seungcheol remembered from high school.
Back then, Jeonghan had always seemed slightly out of reach. Bright, loud, surrounded by people. Someone you admired from the other side of the room because walking over felt impossible.
Now Jeonghan was sitting across from him, pouting over a marshmallow.
How had ten years turned that into this?
Seungcheol pressed his lips together, pretending to take a sip of coffee because there was a very real urge to laugh. No, not laugh…Something stranger. The irrational urge to reach across the table and poke his cheek.
Where on earth had that come from?
He was not going to poke a grown man's face because he looked cute while losing an argument to a child.
Nabi, completely unaware of the crisis unfolding across the table, nodded firmly. “You're not s'posed to steal.”
Jeonghan finally looked back at her. “I know. I’m sorry.”
Nabi grinned and gave him a thumbs up.
“Good,” Seungcheol chuckled. “Conflict resolved. I don't think we'll need to involve the police after all.”
Jeonghan let out the most dramatic sigh Seungcheol had ever heard. “Thank you. I really didn't want my criminal record to begin with marshmallow theft.”
Nabi became deeply invested in fishing marshmallows out of her mug one by one, humming quietly to herself as though the adults had temporarily become background noise.
“So...” Jeonghan glanced up. “How's work?”
“Busy,” Seungcheol admitted. “The clinic's been full every day this week. Lots of kids with the same viral infection Nabi has. Parents panic a little, I reassure them, children usually recover quickly, everyone goes home happier than they came in.”
“You don't get tired of reassuring people?”
“I do get tired.”
“I mean emotionally.”
Seungcheol considered that. “Not really. I think people deserve reassurance when they're scared.”
Jeonghan smiled into his coffee.
“What?” Seungcheol asked.
“Nothing.”
“You smiled.”
“I smiled because...” He shrugged. “You keep saying things that sound really simple, and then I realize halfway through that they're actually kind of wonderful.”
Oh.
“You're making me sound wiser than I am.”
Jeonghan grinned. “You’re very wise Dr. Cheollie”
Seungcheol shook his head with a smile. “So what have you two been up to this past week? Besides snack theft and emergency doctor visits.”
“Not much. Work has been busy with a new exhibition coming up. Lots of emails. Lots of pretending I know what I’m doing. Nabi’s been keeping me on my toes though. We built a fort in the living room yesterday. It collapsed twice.”
“It was fun” Nabi added. “Uncle Hannie was the dragon.”
Seungcheol smiled, imagining Jeonghan dramatically roaring in a blanket fort.
I would pay money to see that. I’d pay a lot of money.
“Sounds way more exciting than my week,” he said.
Nabi nodded enthusiastically. “I drew a cat…and a princess…and Uncle Hannie as a dragon again.”
Jeonghan groaned but he was smiling. “She’s very creative. I now have seventeen dragon drawings on my fridge. I’m running out of space.”
Seungcheol chuckled. “I’d like to see those sometime.”
The words came out so casually that Seungcheol didn't think twice about them.
Jeonghan, unfortunately, thought about them enough for both of them.
“Oh yeah come over. I mean... you could. Not like... you don't have to…I wasn't... actually... I mean...” Jeonghan scratched the back of his neck and gave an awkward little laugh. “I wasn't inviting you over just to stare at my refrigerator like some kind of... fridge museum. Although that sounded exactly like an invitation, didn't it? God.”
Seungcheol stayed quiet.
Experience had taught him something over the past two meetings. If he let Jeonghan keep talking, Jeonghan would almost always make things worse for himself.
“I just meant...” Jeonghan continued, already committed to the downward spiral. “Like... if you're ever nearby. Not that people are just... nearby my apartment. That sounded like I'm waiting by the window hoping you'll accidentally walk past. I'm not. That would be insane.
Please don't picture me standing behind my curtains like some neighborhood creep. I just mean... if, by complete coincidence, you happened to be in the area. Which you probably never would be, because why would a pediatrician randomly wander into my neighborhood? Unless you had a patient there. But then you'd be working, so inviting you upstairs would be wildly inappropriate. I'd basically be kidnapping a doctor during office hours. Don't do that. I mean, don't come. I mean... you can come…just... not professionally. God, what does that even mean? Maybe if there was a group of people there? Like Joshua or my sister or... actually no, then it sounds like I'm organizing an event just to trick you into seeing my refrigerator. I'm not hosting a social gathering around children's dragon drawings. That's not... that's not a thing people do. Is it?”
Nabi gave him a judgemental look even though she didn't understand half of it.
“You speak so fast, Uncle Hannie.” She shook her head slowly. “You keep talking... and talking... and talking.” She made a little circular motion with her finger. “It just keeps going.”
Seungcheol nodded. “Yeah it was very fast.”
“You didn’t understand what I was saying?” Jeonghan asked.
“I think I understood a little.”
“You did? …Which part?”
“The part where you were trying to invite me over to see the dragon drawings.”
Jeonghan sighed. “I mean... no one's inviting you. I mean—not that you're not invited. You're just... not obligated to come. Which sounds rude. I'm not trying to uninvite you. I'm trying to remove the social pressure from the invitation while keeping the invitation itself intact. I just don't want you thinking I'm expecting you to come because then you'll feel guilty if you don't want to come, and then if you do come I'll wonder if you're only there because you felt guilty, which completely defeats the purpose because I'd rather you came because you actually wanted to, not because I accidentally manipulated you with refrigerator art—”
“Jeonghan” Seungcheol touched his hand.
Jeonghan looked down at his hand.
Why is his hand on my hand? Ahhhhhhhhh I'm so tingly ! tingly? The fuck?
Why am I looking at the hand?
Look at his face.
No, that's worse.
Seungcheol was smiling at him.
“I understood what you meant,” he said softly. “You don't have to keep explaining.”
“Okay…”
Seungcheol shrugged. “If inviting me over is causing this much psychological damage, we can skip it. You can just send me pictures of the dragon drawings instead.”
Seungcheol was proud of himself.
Good job. Really smooth, Choi Seungcheol. You somehow turned, ‘You don't have to invite me over’ into, ‘Please message me later.’
That had not been intentional. Well...maybe a little.
“Oh my god yes !” Jeonghan grinned. “That's so much easier. I've literally been trying to think of an excuse to text you all week, and now I have one.”
Seungcheol chuckled. “You never need an excuse to text me. You can do it whenever you want.”
“Oh”
Seungcheol’s phone rang. He glanced at the screen.
“Ah.”
He reluctantly let his hand slip away from Jeonghan's and answered the call.
“Hi, Mom... Yeah, I'm just leaving now... No, I haven't forgotten... I'm literally walking out... Okay. I'll be home soon.”
He ended the call.
“My mom's staying with me for a couple of days,” he explained as he stood, picking up his coffee. “I'd better head home before she decides I've abandoned her. She gets bored very easily.”
“Right...” Jeonghan nodded. “I mean... if she's bored while you're at work, she could totally hang out with me. Not because I specifically want to meet your mom! That came out weird. I just meant... people get lonely when they're in house all day. Not that your mom gets lonely. I don't know your mom. She could have, like, seventeen hobbies. Maybe she's perfectly happy knitting or gardening or... I don't know what your mom does. Why am I assigning hobbies to a woman I've never met? Forget the hobbies. My point is, if she ever wanted company, I'd happily keep her company. Not because I'm trying to impress your mother! That sounds like I'm already campaigning for Best Future Son-in-Law, which is... absolutely not what this is. I haven't even successfully texted you yet. It'd be insane to skip straight to befriending your mother. I just... if she ever got bored, I'd make coffee, we'd talk, maybe I'd show her Nabi's dragon drawings. Actually that makes me sound like I lure strangers into my apartment with children's artwork. Please don't tell your mom any of this. Anywayyyy what i’m trying to say is—”
Nabi covered his mouth with one small hand.
“Mmph?”
“You're doing it again” she informed him.
Seungcheol laughed. “I think she's becoming very good at recognizing the symptoms.”
Nabi nodded proudly. “I know Uncle Hannie disease.”
Jeonghan pulled away Nabi's hand. “Oh, this is humiliating”
“A little,” Seungcheol said, still smiling. “But for what it's worth... I don't think my mom would mind meeting you.”
And somehow... that seemed to embarrass Jeonghan even more. His ears turned pink almost instantly, and for the first time in the entire conversation, he had absolutely nothing to say.
It lasted all of three seconds.
“…I think that's somehow worse.” Jeonghan muttered. “Not that it’s worse that your mom would not mind—you know what, I’ll just shut up.”
Seungcheol chuckled and looked at Nabi. “get well soon little butterfly !”
“I will !”
Seungcheol smiled softly at Jeonghan. “And you…take care of my brave patient.”
“I will”
“And,” Seungcheol added as he took a step backward toward the door, “I expect photographic evidence of those dragon drawings as soon as you get home.”
Jeonghan smiled so brightly “Yes, Doctor.”
“No excuses.”
“No excuses.” Jeonghan nodded.
Seungcheol smiled and walked out.
Jeonghan dropped his head on the table. “I’m so stupid.”
Nabi patted his back.
★
Few hours later~
Jeonghan: Hi Dr. Cheollie! This is Yoon Jeonghan. (◕◡◕✿)
Jeonghan: …From the reunion.
Jeonghan: …Also from your clinic.
Jeonghan: You definitely know who I am.
Seungcheol : I definitely know who you are Yoon Jeonghan.
Jeonghan: I spent like 8 mins trying to write a normal first text.
Jeonghan: Apparently I can't do normal.
Seungcheol: Weren't you supposed to send me dragon drawings?
Jeonghan: RIGHT.
Almost immediately his phone was flooded.
Image.
A refrigerator almost entirely covered with children's drawings.
Another image.
A dragon with enormous wings breathing rainbow-colored fire.
Another.
A princess holding a sword almost twice her height.
Another.
A stick figure labeled UNCLE HANNIE with tiny horns, giant wings and what looked like six tails.
Jeonghan: That's me apparently.
Jeonghan: According to Nabi I don't breathe fire correctly.
Jeonghan: She's a harsh art director.
Seungcheol zoomed into the last drawing.
There was another stick figure beside Dragon Hannie.
Holding what looked suspiciously like...a stethoscope.
Seungcheol: Who's the doctor?
Jeonghan: …
Jeonghan: She drew that after we came home.
Jeonghan: She said Dragon Hannie needed a doctor friend.
Seungcheol: I think she did a good job.
Jeonghan: You do?
Seungcheol: Mhm.
Jeonghan: Good. (◕◡◕✿)
Seungcheol: I like this. (◕◡◕✿) it’s cute.
Jeonghan: REALLYYYY ???
Seungcheol: How many of those do you know?
Jeonghan: Hundreds ! Different situations require different tiny faces !
Jeonghan: This is an art.
Seungcheol: Teach me.
Jeonghan: Lesson one.
Jeonghan: Happy = (◕‿◕)
Jeonghan: Excited = (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
Jeonghan: Embarrassed = (/ω＼)
Jeonghan: Very embarrassed = (///￣ ￣///)
Jeonghan: Emotionally collapsing = (╥﹏╥)
Seungcheol found himself smiling wider with every message.
Seungcheol: Which one are you right now?
Jeonghan: (///￣ ￣///)
Jeonghan: Because you said my emoticons were cute.
Jeonghan: Which, by extension, means you called me cute.
Jeonghan: Unless I've misunderstood basic grammar.
Seungcheol: You understood correctly.
Nothing.
No typing.
20 seconds passed.
30 seconds passed.
A full minute.
Had he broken him?
Seungcheol: hello?
Jeonghan: I DROPPED MY PHONE.
Seungcheol laughed.
Jeonghan: I read your message. I made this face (⊙＿⊙) Then my hands forgot how to exist.
Jeonghan: Phone gone. Gravity won.
Jeonghan: Then I dropped it again trying to pick it up.
Seungcheol laughed again.
Seungcheol: Twice?
Jeonghan: Don't judge me.
Seungcheol : Nothing to judge. I think you're functioning exactly the way you normally do.
Jeonghan: …wow I can't even argue with that. (◞‸◟)
Seungcheol: I meant it as a compliment.
Jeonghan: Then I'll accept it (◕◡◕✿)
There was something absurdly endearing about the way Jeonghan existed.
Jeonghan: Okayyyy, I gotta go! I'm probably gonna text you... often now.
Jeonghan: Just warning you in advance. In case you decide muting me is the healthiest option.
Seungcheol: I won't mute you.
Jeonghan: Are you sure?
Jeonghan: Because Joshua muted me once.
Jeonghan: To be fair...I sent him 23 cat videos in one afternoon.
Jeonghan: But they were all DIFFERENT cats !
Seungcheol: I believe you.
Jeonghan: THANK YOU
Jeonghan: Nobody else appreciates the artistic range of cats.
Seungcheol: Text me whenever you want, Jeonghan.
Jeonghan: I really like hearing that. (◕‿◕)
Seungcheol: goodnight Jeonghan.
Jeonghan: Goodnight, Cheollie. (◕◡◕✿)
Seungcheol stared at the message. His brain was short-circuiting.
Not Doctor Cheollie.
Just...Cheollie.
Jeonghan : DOCTOR CHEOLLIE ! GOODNIGHT !
Jeonghan: I'm putting my phone down now before I accidentally call you “my beloved”
Seungcheol: goodnight. No more overthinking and panicking for you. (◕‿◕)
Jeonghan: you followed my lesson ! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
Seungcheol chuckled and put the phone down.
~
Over the next few days, texting Jeonghan quietly became part of Seungcheol's routine.
He'd finish seeing a patient, wash his hands, glance at his phone.
There'd be three unread messages.
Sometimes five.
Once there were twelve. Not because anything had happened, just because Jeonghan had thoughts.
Jeonghan: Good morning Dr. Cheollie! (◕‿◕)
Jeonghan: I just walked into a glass door.
Jeonghan: It was clean.
Jeonghan: I'd like everyone involved in its manufacturing to apologize.
Half an hour later, during a break between appointments, Seungcheol responded.
Seungcheol: Did anyone see?
Jeonghan: Joshua.
Jeonghan: He laughed.
Jeonghan: Didn't even ask if I was okay.
Jeonghan: I deserve kinder friends.
Seungcheol: Were you okay?
Jeonghan: You asked. (╥﹏╥)
Jeonghan: Yeah I'm okay.
~
The following afternoon~
Jeonghan: Important question.
Seungcheol: Go ahead.
Jeonghan: If someone accidentally burns toast...and then accidentally burns the 2nd toast...is attempting a 3rd toast considered bravery or stupidity?
Seungcheol: How hungry are you?
Jeonghan: Very.
Seungcheol: Bravery.
Jeonghan: THANK YOU (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
Jeonghan: Joshua said stupidity
30 minutes later~
Jeonghan: Update.
Jeonghan: Fourth toast succeeded.
Jeonghan: Third toast died a hero.
~
Another day~
A picture arrived.
A fluffy orange cat sitting outside an art gallery.
Jeonghan: Look. Employee of the month.
Seungcheol: Does he work there?
Jeonghan: Emotionally.
A little while later, another picture.
The same cat…sleeping.
Jeonghan: He got tired from supervising.
Seungcheol: cute.
Another evening~
Jeonghan: Nabi’s fever is gone completely yay ! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
Jeonghan: she has a question though.
Seungcheol: what is it?
Jeonghan: She wants to know if dinosaurs got stickers after being brave.
Seungcheol laughed.
Seungcheol: Absolutely !
A voice message appeared.
He pressed play.
Tiny kid’s excitement immediately filled his home.
“YAYYYY! I TOLD UNCLE HANNIE!”
A muffled voice in the background.
“Nabi, don't yell into the—”
Kid’s tiny voice again.
“YOU WERE WRONG!”
Then Jeonghan, much farther away.
“...I wasn't wrong! I said maybe dinosaurs didn't have pediatricians!”
The recording ended with both of them laughing.
Seungcheol listened to it twice.
Then, for absolutely no reason whatsoever...a 3rd time.
Seungcheol: Tell Nabi I stand by my professional opinion.
Seungcheol: Every brave dinosaur deserved a sticker.
Jeonghan: She says thank you. (◕‿◕)
Jeonghan: She's completely obsessed with dinosaurs. We have watched every dinosaur movie ever made.
Jeonghan: What kind of movies do you like?
Jeonghan: Let me guess...
Jeonghan: Documentaries?
Jeonghan: Something incredibly nerdy?
Seungcheol smiled.
Seungcheol: I like murder mysteries and romcoms.
Jeonghan: REALLYYYYYY????? (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
Jeonghan: I LOVE THOSE TOOOOOO!!!!
Jeonghan: WE HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON !!! SOULMATES !!!!
Seungcheol laughed.
Seungcheol: That escalated quickly.
Jeonghan: Sorry.
Jeonghan: Potential soulmates?
Seungcheol: you’re so weird (compliment)
Jeonghan: I love you (platonic)
Seungcheol: Thank you for the clarification.
Jeonghan: You're welcome. I believe in clear communication.
Seungcheol: Clearly.
Jeonghan: Exactly. Just so we're on the same page. If I ever say “I hate you.” It'll also be platonic.
Seungcheol: Good to know.
Jeonghan: Unless you eat my fries. Then it's personal.
Seungcheol: Noted.
Jeonghan: (◕‿◕)
★
2 days later~
Nabi went back to her own house.
Which meant Jeonghan needed his bestie.
He was sprawled across Joshua's sofa while Joshua occupied the opposite end with a glass of red wine in one hand and Jeonghan's phone in the other.
The apartment had been quiet for almost five full minutes.
Joshua hadn't laughed, he hadn't sighed, he hadn't made one sarcastic comment, he was simply... reading silently…judgmentally.
Jeonghan couldn't take it anymore.
“Saaay something” he groaned, sitting up. “You're making me so nervous I feel like I have to use the bathroom.”
Joshua didn't even look up. “Please don't ever say that to Seungcheol.”
“I'll try.”
“You should do better than trying”
Another page of messages scrolled past. Joshua took another sip of wine.
Still nothing.
“Oh my god.” Jeonghan grabbed a cushion and hugged it to his chest. “Is it bad? Is it so bad you've gone into shock?”
Joshua finally lowered the phone. “These texts are absolutely flirty.”
“...They are?”
“...Jeonghan.”
“No, seriously.”
“You called yourselves potential soulmates.”
“That was a joke.”
“You told him you loved him.”
“I literally wrote 'platonic' in brackets.”
Joshua sighed. “He also responds well.”
“...He does?”
Joshua nodded and smiled. “Now it's time.”
Jeonghan didn't like that smile. “...Time for what?”
“The next stage.”
“...Which is?”
Joshua looked him dead in the eye. “Ask him out.”
“NOOOOOOOOOOO.”
“Jeonghan.”
“I CAN'T.”
“Why?”
“Because...” He pointed at himself. “Have you met me?”
“Yes.”
“I'd combust!”
“You won't.”
“I'll text him 'Would you like to—' and then I'll somehow accidentally invite his entire extended family to a bowling alley and apologize 14 times before deleting my own message.”
Joshua nodded thoughtfully. “That is a realistic possibility.”
“THANK YOU.”
“But you'll survive.”
“I'll die.”
“You'll blush.”
“I'll blush myself to death.”
Joshua opened Jeonghan’s phone again and texted.
Choi Seungcheol, I am letting you know that there is a new murder mystery movie in theatres. I am formally inviting you, in a totally platonic way, to come watch that movie with me.
He showed it to Jeonghan. “All you have to do is click send. It’s that easy. Look, I even typed it weirdly like you, even added the word platonic”
“What if he says no?”
“Then you'll survive.”
“What if he says yes?”
Joshua blinked. “…Isn't that the outcome we're aiming for?”
“Yes, but then it's a date.”
“You're the one who wants him.”
“I know! I didn't think this far ahead !”
Joshua sighed “Jeonghan.”
“…Yeah?”
“Press.”
“…”
“Send.”
Jeonghan whined so dramatically he nearly folded in half.
Then after a few more minutes of whining he sat up straight.
“…Can I add one thing?”
Joshua gave him the phone.
Jeonghan quickly typed. (◕◡◕✿)
“There. It softens the emotional damage.”
“…Sure.”
Jeonghan closed his eyes. “3…2…1…”
He jabbed the send button.
“Oh my GOD ! No reply !”
“…It's been 2 seconds.”
“He blocked me.”
“He didn't.”
“He absolutely blocked me.”
“He absolutely didn't.”
“He's probably calling the police.”
“For inviting him to a movie?”
“I don't know!”
“Give it a few minutes.”
“I don't have a few minutes.”
“You literally do.”
“My heartbeat disagrees.”
For the next five minutes, Joshua watched Jeonghan become the most exhausting human being alive.
He checked the chat, locked the phone, unlocked it again, walked into the kitchen, came back, drank half a glass of water, checked the chat, stared at the ceiling.
“Still nothing.”
“It's been only a few minutes.”
“It has been an eternity.”
“At this rate you're going to develop wrinkles before he replies.”
“I already have wrinkles.”
“You absolutely don't.”
Another minute passed.
Jeonghan sighed dramatically and collapsed face-first onto the sofa.
“I should've stayed mysterious.”
“You've never been mysterious.”
“I could've started today.”
His phone buzzed.
Jeonghan saw it lightly in the notification and caught the words ‘sorry I…’
“Oh no”
He tossed the phone away.
“He’s saying sorry I can't !” Jeonghan teared up.
Joshua picked up the phone, opened the text and sighed. “You idiot”
He turned it around.
Seungcheol: Sorry. I was with a patient.
Seungcheol: I'd like that.
Seungcheol: I have a day off two days from now. Would you like to go then? (◕‿◕)
“He used my emoticon.” Jeonghan smiled.
Joshua snorted. “That's the part you're focusing on?”
“He used my emoticon.”
Joshua handed the phone back. “I think that's a yes.”
Jeonghan hugged the phone “YES !”
★
Two days later, Jeonghan arrived at the movie theater almost 20 minutes early.
It wasn't because he was excited.
It was because arriving exactly on time felt dangerous.
If he got there early, he could calmly wait, mentally prepare himself, rehearse normal greetings, remember how adults behaved on completely platonic movie outings that definitely weren't dates even though Joshua had spent the last 48 hours calling it a date every chance he got.
He stood near the entrance pretending to read the posters while actually checking his reflection in the glass every thirty seconds.
Seungcheol showed up right on time, hands in his jacket pockets, looking unfairly calm and handsome.
“Hey” Jeonghan said, voice cracking like he was thirteen again.
“Hey” Seungcheol smiled.
They stood there awkwardly for a few seconds.
“Traffic was crazy, huh?” Jeonghan blurted.
“Yeah. Took longer than I thought.”
“Perfect sunny weather though. At least it’s not raining.”
“True.”
Kill me. This is the worst small talk in history.
Seungcheol cleared his throat. “How’s Nabi?”
Jeonghan shrugged, grateful for the topic change. “She’s back with her parents. Already demanding more hot chocolate and complaining about me.”
Seungcheol chuckled softly. “Sounds about right.”
There was another pause.
“Are we waiting for more people or can we head inside?” Seungcheol asked.
“Let’s go inside. I already got the tickets.”
“I’ll pay you.”
“No, it’s fine,” Jeonghan said quickly. “You can pay the next time we go to a movie.”
Oh my god I just said next time. I casually implied there will be a next time. He’s going to run. He’s going to block me. He—
Seungcheol nodded “Okay.”
He said okay. He wants to go to more movies with me. Okay cool. I’m not freaking out. I’m completely normal.
They went inside the theater, found their seats, and sat down just as the lights started to dim. The movie was about to start.
Jeonghan shifted in his seat, hyper-aware of how close their arms were. “I hope the movie is good. I like when they make you guess the whole time.”
“Me too,” Seungcheol said, settling back. “Especially when the twist is actually good and not ridiculous.”
“Yeah. Nothing worse than a bad twist or when the main character does something stupid and you’re yelling at the screen.”
Seungcheol smiled. “Do you yell at the screen?”
“Only internally. Mostly.”
The lights went fully dark and the movie started.
Jeonghan tried to focus on the opening scene, but all he could think about was how good Seungcheol smelled. That clean, attractive cologne was doing unfair things to him.
How the fuck is cologne turning me on right now?
I want to hug him and breathe him in.
God.
Why does that sound so creepy inside my own head?
You're acting like a complete pervert.
Baby steps, Jeonghan. Shoulder brushing. That’s safe. Totally normal. Friends do that.
He very subtly leaned a little closer and their shoulders brushed.
Seungcheol didn’t move away.
WOOOOOO!
MISSION SUCCESSFUL!
HE DIDN'T MOVE! HE ACCEPTED THE SHOULDER CONTACT!
I’M WINNING AT LIFE !!
Twenty minutes later, the theater’s AC kicked in hard and Jeonghan started shivering. He tried to play it cool, crossing his arms tighter, but it was no use.
Why are theaters always trying to recreate Antarctica?
He tried ignoring it.
A few minutes later another shiver escaped before he could stop it.
Beside him, Seungcheol quietly turned his head and without a word, he shrugged off his jacket and draped it over Jeonghan’s chest like a blanket.
“You’re shivering,” Seungcheol whispered. “Better not catch a cold.”
Jeonghan pulled the jacket higher, breathing in the scent of Seungcheol’s cologne. His brain went fuzzy.
“Thanks.”
He couldn’t focus on anything except Seungcheol, Seungcheol’s scent, Seungcheol’s shoulder…just Seungcheol.
The movie kept playing.
Around 45 minutes in, just as the detective was about to reveal some dramatic piece of evidence…a loud sound exploded through the theater.
BEEEEEEEEEP
The movie stopped.
The fire alarm sprinklers went off, spraying water everywhere.
“There isn't even a fire!”
Jeonghan gasped as icy water drenched his hair, his shirt, Seungcheol's jacket.
“Oh, come on!”
He couldn't even hear himself over the alarm anymore.
People scrambled toward the exits, clutching bags, popcorn buckets, phones, and completely ruined dignity as water continued pouring from above.
The detective never got to reveal the killer.
Jeonghan groaned. “THIS IS THE WORST DATE EVER !”
“Date?” Seungcheol turned to him. Water dripped from his hair onto his forehead. “You didn't tell me this was a d—”
“NO!” Jeonghan squeaked. “Not us! I mean... not our... I mean... the couple in front of us! Imagine how terrible this must be for them. That's what I meant. Very tragic for them. Extremely unfortunate for... those strangers.”
Despite the water dripping from his hair into his eyes, Seungcheol laughed.
“Come on,” he said, standing first. He held out his hand. “Let's get out before we actually drown.”
Jeonghan looked at the offered hand.
His brain, despite the alarm screaming above them and water pouring from the ceiling, chose that exact moment to stop functioning.
He's holding out his hand.
Take the hand, idiot.
He reached out.
The moment their fingers met, Seungcheol closed his hand around his and pulled him gently to his feet.
Jeonghan stumbled forward just enough that he ended up much closer than either of them probably expected.
The alarm blurred into distant noise.
Water continued cascading around them, dripping from Seungcheol's dark hair onto his forehead, sliding down the side of his face. His shirt was soaked through now, clinging to his shoulders
Jeonghan realized he was still holding his hand…or maybe Seungcheol was still holding his.
He wasn't entirely sure anymore.
Why does Seungcheol look at me like that?
He looked at someone like there wasn't anywhere else he'd rather be for those few seconds.
It was a dangerous way to look at another human being.
Jeonghan could actually hear his own heartbeat…or maybe that was just the alarm.
Hopefully the alarm.
Seungcheol's thumb shifted ever so slightly against the back of his hand. It wasn't even a caress. It was probably just his grip adjusting.
Still...every coherent thought quietly packed its bags and left.
Around them, people splashed toward the exits in a panic.
A theater employee kept shouting, “Please proceed calmly!”
Nobody was proceeding calmly.
someone hurried past and bumped into Jeonghan's shoulder.
The spell broke.
Jeonghan blinked “oh”
Seungcheol glanced down at their hands, seeming to realize that they were still standing in the middle of the aisle holding hands while the ceiling actively rained on them.
He let go.
“Now we should actually leave.”
“Yes.” Jeonghan nodded far too many times. “Yes. Leaving. That's... generally what people do during building-wide emergencies.”
They hurried toward the exit with the crowd, shoulders brushing every few steps as people squeezed through the narrow aisles. Outside the theater doors, employees were already handing out tissues and apologizing to everyone passing by.
“False alarm!” one of them called. “We're so sorry ! A sprinkler system malfunction!”
“Ugh” Jeonghan started wringing Seungcheol’s jacket.
“I've committed crimes against this jacket,” he sighed. “Five minutes ago it was warm and heroic. Now it feels like I just rescued it from the bottom of the ocean.”
Seungcheol chuckled. “It's not your fault. You didn't set off the sprinklers.”
“You don't know that.”
“…Did you set it off?”
“No.”
“I was hoping for a more dramatic confession.”
Jeonghan laughed and held the jacket up with both hands. “I still feel bad.”
Seungcheol reached over and took it from his hands
“It would've ended up like this even if I'd still been wearing it” he said.
“I feel like I should pay for it.”
Seungcheol laughed. “You absolutely will not !”
“You sure?” Jeonghan looked at him with big boba ball eyes.
Seungcheol looked away. “y-yeah.”
“Kay” Jeonghan rubbed his stomach. “...I'm starving.”
Seungcheol looked at him.
“You know,” Jeonghan continued, “I think getting unexpectedly rained on burns calories. It has to. There's probably science behind it.”
“Scientifically wrong.” Seungcheol smiled. “ But there's a convenience store across the street.”
Jeonghan followed his gaze. Through the glass windows he could already see shelves of instant noodles stacked in colorful rows.
He grinned. “Ramen?”
“Yes” Seungcheol nodded. “That sounds... weirdly perfect right now.”
“It does.”
Ten minutes later, they carried their steaming cups outside and settled into the faded white plastic chairs in front of the convenience store. The afternoon sun had come back out in full force, warm enough that their soaked clothes were already beginning to dry in uneven patches.
Seungcheol took his first bite and smiled. “I haven't had convenience store ramen in years. I used to live off this stuff during university.”
“You did?”
“Mhm. Usually after late-night study sessions. It was cheap, quick, and the store downstairs was open 24 hours.”
Jeonghan looked over. “Of course you did.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means you're exactly the type of person who'd responsibly eat instant ramen while studying.”
“And what type are you?”
“I'd eat instant ramen because my friends convinced me midnight was a perfectly reasonable time to watch ghost videos.”
“That also sounds accurate.”
“It is.”
They laughed at the same time.
For a while the conversation drifted effortlessly from one thing to another. Favorite convenience store snacks. The strange satisfaction of buying food that cost less than a coffee. Whether cup noodles somehow tasted better outside than they ever did at home.
It was... nice.
Seungcheol looked down at his ramen for a moment.
Two weeks ago he'd imagined every possible version of seeing Jeonghan again. Maybe they'd run into each other at another reunion event. Maybe Jeonghan would finally text him. Maybe they would have dinner somewhere nice if things went well.
None of those imaginary versions had included sitting outside a convenience store in half-dry clothes after being soaked by a broken sprinkler system.
Yet somehow this felt more honest than any restaurant could have.
There wasn't anything impressive about it. No carefully chosen reservation. It was just warm ramen, cheap plastic chairs, sunlight drying the sleeves of his jacket, and Jeonghan sitting across from him looking absurdly happy over instant noodles.
He couldn't stop watching him.
Jeonghan ate with his whole face. Every time he took a bite, his eyes softened a little, like food was something to be appreciated properly. He kept making tiny noises of approval under his breath without realizing it, occasionally blowing dramatically on noodles that definitely weren't hot enough to require that much effort.
At one point he looked up and caught Seungcheol watching.
“…What?”
“You seem to really like ramen.”
“I love ramen.”
“I can tell.”
“It deserves enthusiasm.”
“I've never seen anyone look that happy over instant noodles.”
Jeonghan looked down at his cup. “…Do I?”
“Yup”
“You're judging me.”
“Not at all.”
“You're absolutely judging me.”
“I think it's cute.”
Jeonghan's chopsticks stopped halfway to his mouth.
“…Oh.” He quietly finished the bite. “…Well.” He took another bite. “…Good.”
The tips of his ears had turned pink again.
Seungcheol smiled into his own cup.
By the time they finished eating, the cups were empty, their clothes were mostly dry, and the afternoon had started melting into early evening.
They threw away the containers and walked together toward the intersection where they'd have to head in different directions.
For a second neither of them said anything.
Seungcheol slipped his hands into his pockets.
“We should do this again.”
Jeonghan smiled. “Yeah?”
“There’s a Japanese ramen place I like. It's much better than convenience store ramen. Since you love ramen, maybe you’ll love that restaurant too”
Jeonghan's face lit up. “Yes! Yes! I’d love that !”
Seungcheol smiled. “I’ll text you when I’m free.”
“Yes!” Jeonghan said again. “I'm available all the time. No, that's a lie. I do work. I work most days. But my evenings are very, very free. Not because nobody likes me! I just... schedule things well. That's what I meant.”
“I'll keep that in mind.” Seungcheol chuckled.
“Great. Cool. Awesome. Then... I'll wait for your text.”
“okay”
There was a small pause after that, the kind that usually meant people hugged, shook hands, or left.
Neither of them seemed entirely sure which category they belonged in.
“So...” Jeonghan rubbed the back of his neck. “I guess this is where we go our separate ways.”
“I guess it is.”
“Thanks for today.”
“You're thanking me?” Seungcheol smiled. “I'm pretty sure you bought the movie tickets.”
“The movie tried to drown us.”
“It did.”
“And then we had convenience store ramen.”
“We did.”
Jeonghan laughed quietly. “Honestly... I think the ramen was my favorite part.”
Seungcheol looked at him for a second before nodding. “Mine too.”
That smile again.
God.
How did someone smile like they were handing you something fragile?
“Well...” Jeonghan took a few careful steps backward. “Bye, Dr. Cheollie.”
“Bye, Jeonghan.”
He watched Jeonghan turn and start walking down the sidewalk, hands tucked into his pockets, damp hair still refusing to behave despite drying under the afternoon sun.
Seungcheol waited another second before turning in the opposite direction.
He walked a few steps.
I wonder if he's looking back.
Behind him, Jeonghan was thinking exactly the same thing.
Is he looking? Wait should I look? Jeonghan thought and turned back.
Seungcheol was still walking forward without looking back once.
Jeonghan pouted and turned forward and kept walking.
At almost that exact moment, Seungcheol slowed and turned around.
Jeonghan was facing forward, completely oblivious, still walking away with his hands in his pockets.
Seungcheol smiled to himself before quietly turning back around.
Another few seconds passed and Jeonghan turned around. Seungcheol was facing forward.
Jeonghan groaned and turned forward again. Fine, be mysterious. See if I care. (I care.)
Seungcheol turned back and Jeonghan was still walking away.
He turned forward.
Neither of them noticed that they'd looked back almost at the exact same moments.
They simply continued in opposite directions.
Two dates.
Well... one reunion, one movie that never finished, one convenience store ramen, one almost-kiss, and approximately two hundred moments where Yoon Jeonghan had said something so painfully awkward it should have ended the conversation instead of somehow making Seungcheol want to hear the next sentence even more.
Jeonghan was probably replaying every embarrassing thing he'd said.
Seungcheol was replaying every one of them too.
The difference was that Jeonghan was almost certainly cringing.
Seungcheol was smiling.
And somehow, that felt like a very good place for whatever this was to begin.
★
Next Thursday evening, Seungcheol stood outside the little Japanese restaurant with his hands tucked into the pockets of his jacket.
His phone vibrated.
Jeonghan: I'm gonna be 2 mins late I'm sorry 😭
Seungcheol: Are you texting while driving?
Jeonghan: NO !!!
Jeonghan: my car wouldn't start 😭 I had to abandon it and get a cab
Jeonghan: I'm on my wayyyyy pleaseeee don't leaveee
Seungcheol: I'm not leaving.
Jeonghan: (◕‿◕)
Seungcheol slipped his phone back into his pocket, still smiling.
Two minutes, apparently, was plenty of time for Yoon Jeonghan to turn being late into something strangely endearing.
Three minutes later, a yellow taxi pulled up in front of him.
Seungcheol looked up just as the back door flew open.
Jeonghan was already halfway out, still leaning back into the car instead of paying attention to where his own feet were.
“Thank you so much! Seriously, I'm so sorry you had to listen to me complain about my car the whole ride. I hope you have a really good evening! Also, please tell your car I admire its work ethic because mine clearly has none.”
The driver laughed. “You too, sir.”
“Drive safe!”
“I will.”
Jeonghan smiled, took one confident step backward without looking...and immediately caught the edge of the curb.
His balance disappeared so fast and before he could properly fall, a hand caught him by the waist.
Jeonghan froze. He looked down at the hand around his waist. Then up at Seungcheol.
His cheeks immediately turned pink and his voice turned squeaky “HI !”
Seungcheol smiled, gently steadying him until he was standing properly again before letting go. “Hi.”
The taxi was still waiting.
“Oh.”
Jeonghan spun around so quickly he nearly lost his balance a second time.
“Sorry! Sorry, you can go now! Thank you!”
He shut the door.
The driver waved through the window before pulling away.
Jeonghan rubbed the back of his neck, avoiding Seungcheol's eyes. “I swear I'm usually capable of exiting a vehicle.”
“I believe you.”
“You shouldn't.”
“I do.”
“...Okay.”
That seemed to satisfy him.
He smiled to himself, then looked at Seungcheol properly. “How long have you been waiting?”
“About ten minutes.”
Jeonghan winced. “I really did mean what I texted. My car just... refused. I stood there trying to start it for like five minutes thinking maybe if I believed in it enough it'd work.”
“And?”
“It didn't respond to positive reinforcement.”
“That's unfortunate.”
“I even patted the steering wheel.”
Seungcheol laughed. “I don't think cars work that way.”
“I know that now.”
There was a small pause between them. Not awkward exactly. They were still figuring out how to start conversations in person without a phone screen in between.
Jeonghan glanced toward the restaurant. “This is the place?”
“Yeah”
“So... should we go in before I say anything else embarrassing?”
“I think that's a good idea.”
The hostess led them to a booth near the window.
They sat opposite each other.
Jeonghan picked up the menu almost immediately. Not because he was reading it but because it gave his hands something to do.
“I've already decided,” Seungcheol said.
Jeonghan looked over the top of the menu. “You didn't even pretend to think.”
“I come here a lot.”
“So you're loyal.”
Seungcheol smiled. “Yeah... I guess that's one way to put it. I just know what I like, and once I do, I tend to stick with it. I'm... pretty stubborn like that.”
“With ramen?”
“With most things.”
Jeonghan smiled. “That’s nice.”
“Is it?”
“Mhm.” He shrugged. “People spend so much time chasing the next better thing. Better restaurant, better job, better phone, better... everything. It's nice knowing someone who finds something they love and just... stays.”
Seungcheol looked down at the menu for a moment with a small smile. “I don't know if it's nice. It's just how I've always been. Once I love something, it's actually pretty hard for me to stop.”
Jeonghan's fingers tightened ever so slightly around the menu.
He doesn't even realize the things he says…or maybe he does. No... he definitely doesn't. Because if he did, he wouldn't be sitting there looking so calm.
Jeonghan cleared his throat and looked down before Seungcheol could notice he'd been staring.
“...Well,” he mumbled, pretending to study the menu he'd already decided not to read, “I guess I'll have whatever the stubborn guy's having.”
Seungcheol smiled and called over the waiter and ordered their food.
Once she walked away, Seungcheol turned to Jeonghan. “I hope I don't disappoint you. I hope you like what I ordered.”
“You haven't disappointed me yet.” Jeonghan smiled. “I trust you”
“Good.” Seungcheol whispered.
He lowered his eyes to the table almost immediately, pretending to straighten the chopsticks. Hearing “I trust you” from Jeonghan had done something deeply inconvenient to his heartbeat.
He wasn't a teenager anymore and yet one impossibly expressive man trusted his ramen recommendation and suddenly he had to remember how breathing worked.
He cleared his throat. “how was work?”
That was all the invitation Jeonghan needed.
For the next five minutes he talked without stopping, bouncing from one story to another with absolutely no regard for transitions. An artist had submitted a sculpture two days before the deadline and then immediately changed their mind about everything. One of the gallery interns had accidentally emailed a draft to the press instead of the final version. Someone had somehow managed to misplace three expensive paintings that, thankfully, had never actually been missing because they'd been hanging in the wrong room the entire morning.
Every story branched into three smaller stories before somehow circling back to the original point, and halfway through Jeonghan completely forgot what he'd originally been trying to explain.
“I had a reason for telling you all this,” he admitted, frowning thoughtfully. “Wait... no, it'll come back.”
“It probably will.”
Seungcheol rested his chin on his hand and simply listened.
He barely said anything.
He didn't need to.
Watching Jeonghan talk was strangely addictive. His hands never stopped moving, his eyebrows reacted before his mouth did, and every emotion crossed his face without permission. Excitement, embarrassment, frustration, amusement. Nothing stayed hidden for long.
It made him think about high school.
Back then, Jeonghan had looked almost unreal. Too bright, too beautiful, too surrounded by people.
Seungcheol used to catch glimpses of him between classes, laughing so hard he'd bend over, surrounded by friends, waving his arms dramatically as he told another story. Everyone else saw the popular kid. The beautiful kid. The loud kid everyone wanted to know.
Seungcheol had always found himself wondering about the quieter moments instead.
Who was Jeonghan when nobody was watching?
Who made him laugh like that?
Did he ever get tired of being everyone's favorite person?
It felt embarrassingly cliché to admit, even to himself, that he'd spent three years in love with someone he'd never spoken to. People would probably call it a crush. Infatuation. Obsession, if they were feeling dramatic.
Maybe they wouldn't be entirely wrong.
But it had never felt demanding. He'd never sat there wishing Jeonghan would love him back. He'd simply... loved him quietly…from a distance that felt respectful, from a distance that felt safe.
And somehow that had been enough.
Until now.
Now Jeonghan sat in front of him, laughing at his own story before he'd even reached the punchline.
Now Seungcheol knew that Jeonghan panicked over text messages, adored ramen, worried himself sick over 6 year olds with mild fevers, stole marshmallows from children, invited people over to admire dragon drawings on his refrigerator, and used tiny smiling emoticons like they were punctuation.
Adult Jeonghan wasn't less wonderful than the boy he'd loved.
He was infinitely more.
Because he was real.
Because he wasn't standing on the other side of a crowded hallway anymore.
Because Seungcheol was allowed to sit here and listen to him lose the plot halfway through another story.
He didn't want to love Jeonghan from across a room anymore.
He wanted this.
Movie dates that turned into convenience store ramen.
Texts that made him smile during lunch breaks.
Listening to long rambles that somehow answered a question he'd asked with three words.
He wanted to wake up next to this man someday and spend the rest of his life asking, “How was your day?” just so he could hear the answer.
I want to marry him.
It was an absurd thought.
“Seungcheol?”
“Hm?”
“I asked if you were listening.”
“I was.”
Jeonghan narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “Then what was the point of my story?”
“You're trying to convince your boss that printing brochures where the art is upside down was an artistic choice.”
Jeonghan chuckled. “Damn you really were listening”
Their food arrived then. The bowls were set down in front of them.
Jeonghan leaned in with a smile. “Oh, that smells incredible.”
“I told you.”
“You did.” He picked up his chopsticks, separated them carefully, then looked across the table. “Okay. If this is life-changing, I'm blaming you.”
“I'll take that risk.”
Jeonghan smiled. He looked down at his ramen, lifted his chopsticks, caught a bundle of noodles and gently blew on them.
Across from him, Seungcheol did the same.
Neither of them managed to take a bite. Someone yelled “EVERYBODY, PLEASE STOP EATING!”
The entire restaurant went still.
A member of staff hurried into the dining room, looking pale.
“We're so sorry, everyone! There's been a gas leak! Please exit the restaurant immediately!”
Jeonghan stared at the untouched bowl in front of him. He looked at Seungcheol. Then back at the ramen.
“...No.”
The staff member spoke again, louder this time. “Please leave everything behind and head outside immediately!”
Jeonghan slowly put his chopsticks back on the bowl.
He sighed “I'm starting to think the universe just doesn't want us to hang out together.”
Seungcheol looked at the untouched ramen. Then at the employees rushing everyone toward the exit.
“…Yeah,” he admitted. “It’s starting to build a pattern.”
People were already filing out around them, chairs scraping against the floor, conversations dissolving into confused complaints. Seungcheol pushed his own chair back and stood, then looked at Jeonghan, who was still staring at the bowl with the expression of someone being forced to abandon true love.
He couldn't help smiling.
He held out his hand.
“Come on. Let’s go before we die.”
Jeonghan looked up at him, looked at the offered hand, then sighed dramatically as he slipped his own into it.
“Fine.”
Seungcheol closed his fingers around his hand and gently pulled him to his feet.
They followed the crowd outside.
Restaurant staff were apologizing over and over, asking everyone to wait while emergency services checked the building.
Jeonghan stopped on the sidewalk and threw both hands into the air. “This is so stupid !”
Several people glanced over, he didn't care.
“Why can't we have one normal hangout?” He looked up at the sky as though personally addressing whatever cosmic force had declared war on their social lives. “First the movie floods. Now the ramen restaurant is trying to gas us. What next? We go bowling and the ceiling falls on us? We go to a park and get chased by geese? This is so damn stupid.”
He punctuated the last sentence by stomping one foot against the pavement like an offended toddler.
Seungcheol laughed.
Jeonghan turned to him “You're laughing at my suffering.”
“A little.”
Jeonghan groaned.
Seungcheol was still smiling when he reached over and gave Jeonghan's hand a small tug.
“Come on.”
Jeonghan frowned. “Where?”
“Somewhere else.”
“No ! I'm pretty sure another disaster is waiting for us. We'll go to a café and lightning will hit the espresso machine. We'll go to a bakery and they'll announce there's a flour shortage. We'll probably walk into a bookstore and every single shelf will collapse. I'm going home.”
He was so busy arguing with the universe that he didn't even register the fact that Seungcheol was holding his hand.
Seungcheol squeezed his hand. “You're still hungry, aren't you?”
“…Maybe.”
“So am I.”
Jeonghan sighed. “See? We can't even have our dramatic walk-away moment because we're both hungry.”
“We could make it dramatic.”
“How?”
“I dramatically faint from starvation.”
Jeonghan snorted despite himself.
“Convenience store ramen?” Seungcheol asked.
Jeonghan looked at him. Then his shoulders dropped in immediate surrender “…Actually? Yeah.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Seungcheol laughed. “That was a very quick change of heart.”
“I've learned my lesson.”
“Which is?”
“The universe clearly doesn't trust us with proper restaurants.” Jeonghan pointed toward the street like he'd solved a complicated scientific equation. “Convenience stores are humble. They don't get gas leaks. They're emotionally stable.”
“You've assigned personalities to buildings.”
“I cope creatively.”
“I can see that.”
“Besides,” Jeonghan added, finally smiling again, “our convenience store track record is 100% successful.”
“It is.”
“So why mess with perfection?”
Seungcheol couldn't argue with that.
“Alright,” he said, giving Jeonghan's hand one absent-minded tug toward the parking lot. “Convenience store it is.”
“Good.”
They started walking together, still talking about whether convenience stores deserved Michelin stars for emotional support, neither of them noticing until they reached Seungcheol's car that they'd spent the entire walk hand in hand.
By the time they finally let go, it no longer felt accidental. It just felt... surprisingly natural.
★
One week later~
They decided to keep it simple.
No movies.
No restaurants.
Just coffee.
Surely nothing could happen at a coffee shop.
Seungcheol looked around the quiet café “This place seems calm.”
“I've done my research.” Jeonghan smiled. “I specifically chose this café because nothing exciting has ever happened here. It's got 3 stars online. People mostly complain that the muffins are dry. That's exactly the kind of boring establishment we need.”
“You researched disaster-free cafés?”
“I refuse to lose again.”
They ordered their drinks and found two seats by the window while the barista called out names behind the counter.
Seungcheol rested his elbows on the table. “So... how was your day?”
Jeonghan smiled. “Honestly? Pretty good. I think we're finally breaking the curse. Work wasn't chaotic, nobody accidentally emailed confidential documents to the entire mailing list, I got here on time, and we're literally just waiting for coffee. This is the most normal thing we've ever—”
The lights went out.
The café disappeared into darkness.
The espresso machines died with a sad little whine.
“There's a neighborhood-wide power outage” the barista announced after checking her phone.
Jeonghan slowly turned his head toward Seungcheol. “My day's horrible.”
~
The next week, they decided to just avoid buildings.
“Outside,” Jeonghan declared confidently. “Nature has electricity from the sun. Nothing can short-circuit.”
“So we're trusting nature now?”
“Yes.”
“I feel like that's a bigger gamble.”
They bought sandwiches and juice from a convenience store before settling beneath a tree in the park.
For once...nothing happened.
People walked their dogs, kids chased bubbles, a couple flew a kite. It was almost suspiciously peaceful.
Jeonghan unwrapped his sandwich “See? I told you.”
“You did.”
“We've beaten it.”
“You're very confident.”
“We're literally sitting on grass eating sandwiches. Nothing can possibly—”
A blur of golden fur shot across the lawn.
It was an enthusiastic golden retriever whose owner was yelling, “Mochi ! Come back!”
Mochi did not come back.
Mochi came directly toward Jeonghan.
“Oh.”
“Jeonghan.”
“Oh no.”
The dog lovingly stole half his sandwich and ran away.
Jeonghan watched it disappear across the grass. “...You know what?”
“What?”
“I respect the confidence.”
~
Next week Seungcheol suggested something foolproof.
“There’s this scenic path near the river,” he said over text. “I’ve walked it a dozen times. It’s always peaceful. Trees, flowers, quiet water. Nothing ever happens there.”
Jeonghan replied with seventeen different happy emoticons and showed up early
The path was everything Seungcheol promised. Soft light filtering through the trees, wildflowers lining both sides, the river sparkling just beyond the railing. Jeonghan kept stopping every few steps to point at something.
“Look at that purple one. No, that yellow one ! wait look at the way the water’s reflecting. This is unfairly pretty. Why didn’t you bring me here sooner?”
Seungcheol just smiled and walked a little slower so Jeonghan could keep taking pictures of flowers like a tourist.
For twenty whole minutes it was perfect.
Jeonghan walked ahead backwards, arms spread wide. “You know what? I actually think we've done it.”
“Hm?”
“I think we finally found somewhere the universe forgot about.”
Seungcheol laughed. “You're saying that a little too confidently.”
“No, seriously.” Jeonghan spun in a slow circle. “Look around. Birds, flowers, nice weather, no suspicious noises. Nobody's evacuating anything.”
A soft breeze drifted through the trees.
Jeonghan smiled. “This is perfect.”
Almost immediately…the breeze became wind and it pushed Jeonghan's hair directly into his face.
He stopped walking. “…Rude.”
Seungcheol chuckled. “Let me help”
He stepped closer and reached up to brush the loose strands away from Jeonghan's eyes.
Before his fingers even left his face...WHOOSH.
The wind doubled and Jeonghan's hair immediately exploded in every direction.
“Oh my god” Jeonghan muttered. “What’s wrong with the wind?”
Leaves spun around them in tiny tornadoes. Sand from the path flew straight into their eyes.
Jeonghan’s hair was now doing things hair was never meant to do—sticking straight up, whipping across his face, somehow wrapping itself around his own ear.
“I can’t see!” Jeonghan yelled, flailing. “Seungcheol—my hair is attacking me!”
Seungcheol despite being attacked by sand and leaves, laughed at how cute Jeonghan was.
Before either of them could recover, another gust sent a miniature tornado of dry leaves spinning straight toward them.
Both immediately threw their arms over their faces.
“Oh come on!”
“I can't see!”
“Neither can I !”
“I've got dirt in my eye !”
“So do I !”
For a few ridiculous seconds they just stood there, half-blind, hair flying everywhere, being aggressively bullied by the weather.
Then Seungcheol grabbed Jeonghan's wrist. “Run.”
“I was literally about to suggest that !”
They took off down the trail together, laughing as the wind chased them the entire way back. Leaves crunched under their shoes, sand kept getting into their eyes, and Jeonghan had to stop twice because he couldn't breathe from laughing and complaining at the same time.
By the time they reached the car, both of them looked ridiculous.
Jeonghan leaned against the passenger door, trying to flatten his hair with both hands.
He failed spectacularly. Leaves still clung to the strands, and every attempt only made it worse.
Seungcheol watched him for a second, then quietly reached over. “Hold still.”
Jeonghan froze.
Seungcheol’s fingers brushed through his hair carefully, gently pulling free the remaining leaves and smoothing the mess as best he could.
His touch was careful, like he was afraid of breaking something.
Jeonghan’s breath caught. He could feel the warmth of Seungcheol’s hand, the soft drag of fingertips against his scalp, the concentration on the other man’s face.
Neither of them said anything.
Jeonghan’s heart was beating so loud. He kept his eyes on Seungcheol’s face.
Seungcheol’s fingers slowed. He smoothed one last strand behind Jeonghan’s ear, then let his hand rest there for a second longer than necessary.
Their eyes met.
Jeonghan’s throat went dry. He didn’t pull away. He didn’t make a joke. He just looked back at Seungcheol, trying not to blush hard.
Seungcheol’s thumb brushed absently, against the side of his neck.
Then he seemed to remember himself and slowly withdrew his hand. “there…Better.”
“Yeah” Jeonghan whispered. “Better.”
Neither of them looked away.
Then Jeonghan got extremely shy under the eye contact and he had to look away before he became a tomato.
The wind wasn’t strong anymore. It was peaceful.
“I don't think we're cursed anymore.”
“No?” Seungcheol asked.
“I think the universe is just... following us around because it's entertained.”
Seungcheol chuckled. “That sounds surprisingly believable.”
“And next week?”
Seungcheol glanced over. “We'll try again.”
Jeonghan smiled. “Yeah.”
Neither of them questioned it anymore. Every plan had a decent chance of falling apart.
They were going to show up anyway.
~
By the end of the month…
They had been interrupted by a city marathon that blocked every road to the restaurant they'd booked.
A museum had unexpectedly closed because a film crew had rented the entire building without updating the website.
None of the disasters were serious.
None of them actually ruined the day.
Because somewhere along the way, they'd quietly stopped caring about the original plan.
Every failed date, no wait not date, hangout simply turned into another walk.
Another convenience store.
Another hour sitting in Seungcheol's car talking until one of them noticed it was almost midnight.
The funny part wasn't that things kept going wrong anymore. The funny part was that neither of them ever suggested cancelling.
Whatever happened, they'd just look at each other for a second, sigh in perfect synchronization, and one of them would inevitably ask,
“So... convenience store?”
And somehow, every single time, that ended up being the best part of the day.
★
A week later, Seungcheol had texted him that morning.
Can you meet me at the clinic after work? We can leave from here.
Jeonghan had replied almost immediately.
Okay! (◕‿◕)
So after finishing work that evening, he drove straight to Seungcheol's clinic. It was already past closing time.
The nurse looked up when he walked in and smiled “You're here for Dr. Choi?”
Jeonghan smiled back. “Yeah.”
“He's still in his office. Go on in.”
“Thanks.”
He reached the office door, knocked twice, then leaned his head in.
“Seungcheol?”
“Yeah, come in.”
Jeonghan pushed the door open.
Seungcheol had his back to him, standing beside his desk. His white coat was already halfway off.
“Hi!” Jeonghan said as he walked in. “You know, I almost came ten minutes early because I forgot how bad traffic gets around here, but then my GPS randomly decided I should make a right turn into what was very obviously a river. I don't know who programmed that thing but I think they secretly hate me. Then I spent five whole minutes trying to find parking because apparently everyone in this neighborhood collectively decided to drive today. Also, your nurse definitely likes me now. She smiled at me before I even said anything. I think I've officially become a regular at your workplace, which feels a little concerning considering I don't actually want to keep visiting a clinic.”
Seungcheol hummed softly while folding his white coat
“So,” Jeonghan continued, wandering lazily around the office, “where are we eating today? Please tell me it's somewhere disaster-proof. I actually looked up the weather before leaving the house. No rain, no storms, no earthquake warnings. I think we're finally getting a normal hangout.”
He laughed at himself.
Seungcheol didn't.
Weird.
Normally by now Seungcheol would've smiled or teased him.
Instead he was just... packing.
Jeonghan crossed the room and stopped beside him. “...Hey.”
Seungcheol looked up.
Only then did Jeonghan really see his face.
God. He looked exhausted.
Jeonghan reached out before he could overthink it and rested a hand lightly against his shoulder.
“Hey... you okay?”
Seungcheol held his gaze for a second before giving the smallest shake of his head.
“Bad day.” He forced a faint smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. “But it's fine. I don't want to ruin our da—hangout.”
He zipped his bag closed. “Let's just go.”
“No” Jeonghan said quietly. “We have time…If you want to talk...I'll listen. If you don't, that's okay too. I'm not going to force you. We can leave right now if that's what you'd rather do.”
Seungcheol rubbed a hand across the back of his neck.
“It's fine.” He picked up his bag. “Let's go.”
Jeonghan nodded “Okay.”
He didn't argue. If Seungcheol wanted to leave, then they'd leave.
Seungcheol slipped his phone into his pocket and walked to the office door.
He opened it.
The nurse looked up from the reception desk.
He took one step into the hallway…then stopped.
Jeonghan waited behind him.
Seungcheol stood there for a long moment, staring somewhere ahead without really seeing anything.
Finally he looked toward the nurse.
“You can head home. I'll lock up.”
She smiled. “Alright. Goodnight, Doctor.”
“Goodnight.”
She gathered her things and waved at Jeonghan before disappearing down the hallway.
Seungcheol slowly stepped back into his room and closed the door again.
He turned back and his eyes found Jeonghan “I...I'd like to talk.”
Jeonghan smiled. “And I'd like to listen.”
Seungcheol nodded toward the little couch tucked into the corner of the office. It was brightly colored with tiny cartoon animals stitched into the cushions so nervous children would feel less intimidated during appointments.
They sat down and for once...Jeonghan didn't fill the silence. Every instinct in him wanted to. He wanted to tell a stupid story, make a joke, say something ridiculous until Seungcheol smiled again.
Instead...he folded his hands together and waited.
Two minutes passed, Seungcheol didn’t say anything and Jeonghan didn’t rush him.
Finally Seungcheol sighed and rubbed his face. “I have this patient.”
Jeonghan looked up.
“She isn't new. She's six.” A faint, tired smile crossed his face. “She's been coming here for about a year now. Nothing serious. Small infections, fevers, a stomach bug every few months…just... normal kid things.”
He looked down at his own hands.
“A few days ago her mom brought her in and said she'd been tired all the time. She wasn't eating much anymore. Her mom just knew something was off…I remember thinking... it's probably nothing. Kids get tired. Kids refuse to eat…maybe they just need vitamins”
His fingers tightened together. “I ordered blood work and when the results came back...there were cancerous cells.”
Jeonghan's face fell. “Oh... no.”
Seungcheol nodded. “I referred them to a pediatric oncologist I trust. I called him myself. Asked him to see her as quickly as he could….they got the full results today.”
“And?”
“…It's worse than I hoped.”
Jeonghan’s heart sank.
“I kept thinking maybe I'd overreacted.” Seungcheol stared at a spot on the floor. “Maybe it wouldn't be as serious as the blood work made it look. Maybe we'd caught something early….Doctors aren't supposed to wish the tests are wrong... but sometimes you do.”
He looked extremely affected by it.
Jeonghan didn't rush to answer, didn't search for something optimistic, didn't say everything will be okay.
Because sometimes...It wasn't.
Instead he asked quietly, “How did her parents take it?”
Seungcheol leaned back against the couch and stared at the ceiling for a moment.
“Her dad didn't say anything….he just... picked her up because she wanted a hug…and her mom kept asking questions….and the whole time, their daughter was sitting there showing me the drawing she'd made while the adults were talking…She was excited because she'd drawn a unicorn.”
Jeonghan smiled sadly. “She probably had no idea what everyone else in the room was feeling.”
Seungcheol nodded. “I've always known this job would come with days like today…they taught us about it in medical school. Senior doctors warned us. My professors warned us. Everyone says the same thing. Don't take it home.”
His voice cracked. “I don't know how. I've been trying to stop thinking about her all day. I finished every appointment. I smiled. I joked with the kids. I gave out stickers.” He looked over at Jeonghan. “One little boy spent five minutes explaining dinosaurs to me like I'd never heard of them before…and I listened. I genuinely learned something.”
“I know you genuinely did.” Jeonghan smiled.
Seungcheol smiled at that.
It disappeared almost as quickly.
“But every time there was a gap between patients...” Seungcheol admitted, “my mind went straight back to her.”
Jeonghan sat quietly for a moment before asking, “Do you... blame yourself?”
“A little.”
Jeonghan frowned.
“I know it's irrational.” Seungcheol said. “I know I caught it when I was supposed to…I know referring her immediately was the right thing to do.”
“You still wish you'd found it sooner.”
“…Yeah. I keep wondering if there was something I missed six months ago or three months ago. Some tiny clue I could've picked up earlier.”
Jeonghan reached over slowly.
He rested his hand over Seungcheol's hand.
“I don't know enough about medicine to tell you whether that's true,” he said quietly. “But I do know something.”
Seungcheol looked at him.
“I've watched you with Nabi. You notice everything.” Jeonghan’s thumb brushed lightly across the back of his hand. “You noticed she wanted the butterfly sticker before she even asked. You noticed I was panicking before I said a word. You're probably the most observant person I've ever met.”
He squeezed Seungcheol's hand gently. “So... I don't think this happened because you weren't paying enough attention.”
Seungcheol nodded.
Jeonghan kept holding his hand for Seungcheol to know he wasn't sitting through this alone.
“You know Seungcheol...” he said after a while. “I don't think doctors are supposed to stop feeling bad when something like this happens.”
Seungcheol looked at him.
Jeonghan squeezed his hand. “I know everyone says doctors need to separate themselves from patients, and I'm sure they do, because otherwise you'd carry every single family home with you. But if one day you heard news like this and just... shrugged and moved on because you didn't care...I don't think I'd like that version of you.”
Seungcheol nodded.
Jeonghan continued, taking his time this time, not rushing to fill the silence.
“You're going to have days like this for the rest of your career, aren't you? Days where you have to tell people things nobody ever wants to hear. Days where you go home wondering if you could've done something differently, even when you couldn't.” He shrugged. “That sounds... really heavy. So I think it's okay to sit with it for a while. It's okay if you need an hour where you're just sad before you go back to being Dr. Cheollie who smiles at kids and gives out stickers…You don't have to be strong every single minute just because you're the doctor.”
His eyes dropped to their joined hands.
“I don't know what's going to happen to that little girl. I wish I did. I wish I could tell you she's going to be completely okay because that would make both of us feel better.” He smiled sadly. “But I do know something else.”
Seungcheol waited.
“I know that she and her parents have a doctor who actually cares about them.”
He spoke so simply that it almost caught Seungcheol off guard.
“No parent walks into a hospital hoping their doctor has all the answers. They walk in hoping the person sitting across from them won't give up on their kid. They'll remember them. They'll fight for them. They'll tell them the truth even when it's hard. You already do all of that.”
Seungcheol's heart squeezed painfully.
“She trusts you enough to show you her unicorn drawing while her whole world is changing,” Jeonghan said softly. “Her parents keep coming back to you. That doesn't happen because you're lucky. It happens because you're the kind of doctor people feel safe with…I hope... when everything gets difficult for them….they remember that there was one doctor who cared enough to have a bad day because of them.”
Seungcheol looked down at their hands for a few minutes, just absorbing those words.
Jeonghan didn’t say anything else.
Seungcheol smiled softly. “You know what's funny?”
“What?”
“I've spent the last month watching you panic because you accidentally invited me to your apartment. I've watched you apologize to automatic doors because you thought you walked through them too slowly. I've watched you lose arguments to your niece, declare yourself soulmates with me over murder mysteries, and somehow turn every normal conversation into a tiny personal crisis.”
Jeonghan groaned. “Oh no.”
“So, statistically speaking…about 90% of the time you're socially awkward.”
“90 ?” Jeonghan frowned. “That's generous.”
“You're chaotic.”
“I am.”
“You joke when you're nervous.”
“All the time.”
“You overthink absolutely everything.”
“I know.”
“You rarely know what to say.”
“I really don't.”
Seungcheol smiled. “But somehow... whenever it actually matters…you always know exactly what to say.”
Jeonghan went completely still.
“You don't try to fix things that can't be fixed,” Seungcheol continued. “You don't throw empty optimism at people just to make the silence disappear. You just... stay. You listen. You make room for whatever the other person is feeling…I don't think you even realize you're doing it.”
Jeonghan stared at him for a long moment before ducking his head with a shy little smile. “I'd like to be that person…for... the people I care about.”
Seungcheol’s heart beat a little fast.
There wasn't anything dramatic about the moment, no music, no sudden realization…just two people sitting on a tiny couch after closing hours, their hands still intertwined between them.
Seungcheol realized his bad day hadn't disappeared. That little girl was still sick, tomorrow would still be difficult, none of that had changed. But somehow it didn't feel quite as lonely anymore.
His thumb brushed lightly across the back of Jeonghan's hand. “Thank you”
Jeonghan smiled, small and almost embarrassed. “You don't have to thank me…friends are supposed to do this.”
“Friends” Seungcheol repeated.
Jeonghan nodded, blissfully unaware of the way that single word made Seungcheol's heart ache just a little.
“Yeah.”
Maybe for now... that was enough.
They stayed on the little couch for another few minutes without saying much.
Outside the office, the clinic had gone completely still. The nurses had all left. The lights in the hallway had switched to their evening setting, leaving everything just a little dimmer than before.
Jeonghan didn't mind the silence.
Normally he'd be filling it with absolutely anything that came into his head. Some pointless story, a dumb question, an observation about the clinic's suspiciously cheerful wall colors. But this silence didn't feel awkward.
It felt... nice.
Eventually Seungcheol let out a long breath and stood, stretching his back until they cracked.
“I think” he said, picking up his bag, “I've been sitting here feeling sad for long enough. I have to reset my brain so i’m focused enough to help more people tomorrow”
Jeonghan looked up.
Seungcheol held a hand out toward him. “Come on.”
Jeonghan took it without thinking, and Seungcheol pulled him to his feet.
“Let’s go eat” Seungcheol said.
Jeonghan searched his face for a second. “You sure?”
“Mhm.”
“I mean... we don't have to. You can cancel.”
“I know.”
“You can go home.”
“I know.”
“You don't have to pretend you're feeling better just because I came.”
“I'm not pretending.” Seungcheol smiled. “I still had a bad day....but I also still want to spend time with you.”
The words came out so naturally that Seungcheol didn't even seem to notice what he'd admitted.
Jeonghan definitely noticed.
“Oh.” His ears were pink already. “...Okay.”
Seungcheol cleared his throat. “Let’s go?”
“Well...” Jeonghan glanced around the deserted clinic. “We could also just stay here.”
Seungcheol looked at him for a second before asking, “Would you rather sit with me in an empty building where there's no one around?”
Jeonghan answered so quickly. “Yes.”
Seungcheol raised an eyebrow. “You trust me that much?”
“I think the better question is...” Jeonghan tilted his head with a smile. “Do you trust me enough to be alone with you in an empty building where no one's around to save you?”
Seungcheol laughed. “What exactly are you planning to do to me that requires saving?”
Jeonghan opened his mouth and nothing came out. His own question seemed to hit him all at once.
...Oh no.
Why did that sound so…
“I don't know why I phrased it like that.” he mumbled.
“I was wondering.”
“I meant...” Jeonghan was already spiraling. “Like... statistically speaking, people should probably be cautious around other people in empty buildings. That's just good safety advice. I wasn't specifically threatening you. I don't have... threatening plans.”
“You don't?”
“No!”
“So there are no evil schemes?”
“I don't even return library books late because I feel guilty.”
“That is a convincing defense.”
“It should be!”
“So if I stayed here with you... I'd survive?”
“I think so.”
“You think so?”
“98 % chance.”
“What happens during the other 2%?”
Jeonghan sighed “I accidentally talk for 6 straight hours and you die of exhaustion.”
That made Seungcheol laugh properly. “There he is.”
“Who?”
“The Jeonghan I know.”
“The one who threatens people with excessive conversation?”
“The one who makes me laugh without meaning to.”
“Well...” Jeonghan mumbled, failing spectacularly to hide his smile. “I guess that's... less illegal than whatever you thought I meant.”
“It definitely is.”
For a moment they simply looked at each other.
Then Seungcheol gave his hand another gentle tug toward the door.
“As fascinating as the possibility of being talked to death is…I'd still rather feed you first.”
Jeonghan followed without resisting this time. “Good choice…because I become significantly more dangerous when I'm hungry.”
“I believe that.”
“You shouldn't.”
“I've seen you argue with a child over marshmallows.”
Jeonghan groaned. “You're never letting that go, are you?”
“Probably not.”
“I knew I should've chosen a different pediatrician.”
“You're welcome to.”
Jeonghan looked at him, smiled so easily it almost caught Seungcheol off guard, and shook his head.
“Nah I already know what I love. I'm pretty stubborn too.”
For just a second, Seungcheol forgot how to answer.
Then he quietly opened the door for him. “After you.”
~
By the time they stepped outside, the sky had turned that deep blue.
Jeonghan stood patiently on the sidewalk while Seungcheol locked the clinic door, checked it twice out of habit, slipped the keys into his pocket, and turned back to him.
“I actually asked you to meet me here for a reason,” Seungcheol said as they started walking. “There's a taco place a few minutes away. You told me once that tacos are one of your favorite foods, and it's close enough that we don't have to drive. I thought... we could just walk.”
Jeonghan looked genuinely delighted. “You remembered that?”
“Mhm.”
“You remember random things I say?”
“Yes of course I remember everything.”
Jeonghan stared at him for a second before smiling so brightly that Seungcheol had to look away for a moment.
“Okay,” Jeonghan said. “Lead the way.”
The walk wasn't long, but neither of them seemed to mind stretching it out.
They talked. Jeonghan spent a good five minutes complaining that he had recently bought an expensive houseplant because the internet claimed it was impossible to kill, only for it to start dying within 48 hours.
“I genuinely think it saw me and gave up,” Jeonghan said with complete sincerity. “The leaves started drooping like they were disappointed in me as a person. I even apologized to it.”
“You apologized?”
“I thought maybe it appreciated accountability.”
“Did it?”
“It died.”
Seungcheol laughed. “I don't think the apology worked.”
“No, but I felt better.”
“You're unbelievable.”
“I've heard that before.”
“And yet you're still buying plants?”
“I refuse to let nature win.”
By the time they reached the little taco shop, Seungcheol realized something unexpected.
His heart didn't feel quite as heavy anymore.
The day hadn't magically become better. That little girl was still sick. Tomorrow would still bring phone calls and charts and difficult conversations.
But somehow...the weight wasn't sitting on him alone anymore.
Inside, they found a booth near the window and ordered. The food came quickly, and the moment Jeonghan took his first bite, his entire face lit up.
His eyes widened. “This is incredible !”
“I told you.”
“No, you undersold it.” Jeonghan immediately took another bite before he'd even finished the sentence. “How have you been keeping this place a secret?”
“I wasn't.”
“You absolutely were ! You neglected to mention life-changing tacos.”
Seungcheol smiled and picked up his own food.
“I'll remember that next time.”
“There better be a next time.”
“There probably will be.”
Jeonghan hummed happily as he continued eating, completely focused on the food now. Every few bites he'd pause just long enough to announce another dramatic review.
“The salsa deserves an award.”
“Mhm.”
“I'd trust these people with my life.”
“I think that's a little excessive.”
“I don't.”
Seungcheol barely noticed his own dinner.
He kept finding himself looking up.
Watching Jeonghan.
Watching the way he smiled so openly over something as simple as a good meal.
Watching him close his eyes for a few seconds after a particularly good bite.
Watching him become completely, unapologetically excited over tacos.
Some people looked their happiest during huge milestones. Jeonghan looked happiest over tacos.
For some reason, that made Seungcheol's heart ache in the nicest possible way.
It had been one of the worst days he'd had in months. Yet here he was, smiling because the man across from him had just declared salsa to be life-changing.
Maybe...joy really was contagious.
Maybe this was why he'd wanted to leave the clinic instead of sitting alone with his thoughts.
After they finished eating, the waiter returned with a smile. “Can I tempt you with dessert?”
Before Seungcheol had a chance to answer, Jeonghan lit up again. “Yes! Do you still have the warm brownie with vanilla ice cream?”
“We do.”
“I've been thinking about it since I read the menu.”
The waiter laughed. “One brownie coming right up.”
The moment he walked away, Jeonghan leaned both elbows onto the table.
“You know what makes brownies so good? They're perfect even when they're imperfect. Like if the edges are crispy, amazing. If the middle's all soft and gooey, also amazing. If the ice cream starts melting into it...” He placed a hand dramatically over his heart. “That's art. Whoever first put warm brownies and cold ice cream together deserves international recognition.”
“You've thought about this a lot.”
“I have strong dessert opinions.”
“I can tell.”
“I'd genuinely choose a brownie over cake.”
“Really?”
“Every single time.”
“Even on your birthday?”
“Especially on my birthday.”
Seungcheol smiled. “You're surprisingly passionate about this.”
“I believe in standing up for what's right.”
A few minutes later, the waiter returned. Only...he wasn't carrying dessert.
He stopped beside their table looking apologetic. “I'm so sorry. We literally just sold our last brownie to another table.”
“oh...Okay.”
“You're welcome to choose something else.”
Jeonghan looked back down at the dessert menu for exactly two seconds before pushing it away.
“No... that's okay. Can we get the bill please?”
The waiter nodded and left.
Seungcheol looked at Jeonghan. “Just order something else.”
Jeonghan sighed. “There isn't something else.”
“There are at least six desserts on the menu.”
“They're not brownies.”
Seungcheol laughed quietly. “I don't think I've ever seen someone mourn a dessert before it even reached the table.”
“I had already started emotionally preparing to eat it.”
“I can tell.”
“It was going to be a wonderful brownie.”
“I'm sure it would've been.”
Jeonghan nodded with a pout. “It would've changed my life.”
The waiter walked over with the bill and Seungcheol reached for it.
Unfortunately, Jeonghan was faster.
His card was already in the machine before Seungcheol had even picked up his wallet.
“Jeonghan.”
“What?”
“I was paying today.”
“I know.”
“You came all the way here.”
“I also ate approximately twice as much food as you did.” Jeonghan handed the card machine back with a satisfied smile. “Besides, you had a rough day. The least I can do is buy you tacos.”
“You really didn't have to.”
“I wanted to.”
There wasn't much Seungcheol could say to that. So he smiled. “...Thank you.”
“Anytime.”
They stepped back outside and they started walking back to the clinic.
Every few steps their hands brushed and neither of them moved farther away. Neither of them mentioned it.
It kept happening over and over again.
Seungcheol noticed every single one.
Judging by the way Jeonghan suddenly became fascinated by the pavement after each accidental touch, he noticed too.
The silence between them felt... comfortable.
By the time they reached the clinic again, Jeonghan stopped beside his car and unlocked it.
Then he looked around.
“Wait. Where's your car?”
“I didn't bring one.”
“You walked to work?”
“I took a cab.”
“Cabs are expensive this time of night.” Jeonghan frowned. “I'll drive you.”
“It really isn't far. I don't mind taking a cab.”
“I mind you taking a cab.”
Seungcheol smiled. “It's okay, I—”
Before he could finish, Jeonghan stepped closer and grabbed his shoulder with both hands.
“Please let me do one nice thing for you without arguing with me.”
Seungcheol looked at him for a second.
Then he laughed softly. “...Okay.”
“Great !”
A few minutes later they were sitting in Jeonghan's car.
Jeonghan started the car. “So…where am I kidnapping you to?”
Seungcheol gave him his address.
Jeonghan typed it into the navigation, glanced over with a small smile, and pulled out onto the road.
Neither of them realized they were already wondering what excuse they'd use to see each other next week.
~
Fifteen minutes later, Jeonghan pulled into the driveway in front of Seungcheol's house
Seungcheol unbuckled his seatbelt, but his hand stayed resting on it for another second.
This is it. Say goodbye and get out.
Then what?
Text him tomorrow? Too ordinary. Ask him out again? Too soon? No, not too soon. They've been seeing each other every week anyway. Still... if he leaves now, the night is over. He wasn't ready for it to be over.
He turned toward Jeonghan before he could overthink himself out of it.
“Come in.”
“Uh...” Jeonghan rubbed the back of his neck. “You don't have to invite me just to be polite. I know people do that sometimes and then secretly hope the other person says no, so I can absolutely say no if that's easier and we can pretend this conversation never happened.”
Seungcheol laughed. “It's not that.”
“No?”
“No.” He shook his head. “I actually want you to come inside.”
Jeonghan stared at him.
“I just...” Seungcheol said, suddenly feeling oddly self-conscious. “I'd like to hang out a little longer, if you're okay with that.”
Jeonghan bit his lip. “...Is someone else home?”
“No.”
“Just you?”
“Mmm.”
A tiny crease appeared between Jeonghan's eyebrows. “...Is that going to be weird?”
“For who?”
“I don't know.”
“It won't be weird for me.”
Jeonghan looked down at his hands for a second before quietly asking, “...Do you really want me to come inside?”
“Yeah.”
“...Okay…just for a little while.”
The words shouldn't have made Seungcheol as happy as they did.
They climbed out of the car together.
Seungcheol slung his work bag over one shoulder, waited while Jeonghan locked the car, then walked up to the front gate.
He pushed it open and held it there until Jeonghan stepped through. “Welcome.”
Jeonghan ducked his head with an almost shy smile as he walked past.
Cute.
God, everything this man did had started becoming cute.
That seemed medically concerning.
Seungcheol typed in the security code of the front door, unlocked it, and pushed the door open.
“Come in.”
Jeonghan stepped inside carefully, slipping off his shoes by the entrance while Seungcheol did the same.
“Make yourself comfortable,” Seungcheol said. “It's only me here. You don't have to suddenly become extra polite.”
Jeonghan slowly looked around.
The house was pretty. There were framed family photos along one wall, bookshelves in the living room, wooden floors.
“...Wow.”
“What?”
“You live here?”
“I do.”
“...alone?”
“I used to live here with my parents.” Seungcheol nodded toward the family photos. “They moved to Daegu a couple of years ago so they could be closer to my grandparents.”
Jeonghan kept looking around. “This place is huge.”
“It's bigger than I need.”
“You should get a roommate.”
Seungcheol answered before thinking. “Wanna move in?”
Jeonghan froze. His head turned so slowly it was almost painful to watch.
“...What?”
Seungcheol smiled. “I said, wanna move in?”
Jeonghan blushed. “um…depends on how much you're charging for rent.”
“Maybe I'll make it free.”
Jeonghan gasped. “Oh my God ! that's an incredible deal ! That would genuinely solve so many of my financial problems.”
Seungcheol laughed.
“I don't even need my own room,” Jeonghan continued with complete sincerity. “You can just point at a corner and be like, ‘That's your corner now,’ and I'll happily sleep there. I'll curl up. I don't take up much space.”
“I'd give you a room.”
“How generous.”
“But...you'd have to ask my parents first. Technically it's still their house.”
“That seems fair.”
“They're pretty traditional.”
“Oh…they wouldn't want you living with a guy?”
“No. They wouldn't care whether it was a man or a woman. They'd just rather I didn't live with someone before marrying them.”
Jeonghan looked around the house one more time.
“So...” he said thoughtfully. “If I'm understanding this correctly... all I have to do to live in this really nice house rent-free... is marry a cute guy?”
Seungcheol looked at him.
Jeonghan looked back.
...
...
...
“Oh God !” His own sentence finally caught up with him. He laughed awkwardly. “I sound like such a gold digger.”
Without waiting for an answer, he turned toward the front door. “You know what? I should probably head home. Thank you for inviting me over. Sleep well, Doc.”
He reached for the handle and opened it and Seungcheol reached from behind and rested one hand against the door, gently pushing it shut.
Jeonghan froze.
Seungcheol could see the back of his neck turning pink.
“Stay.” he said. “Don't run.”
Jeonghan didn't turn around. “...You know, that sounded a little like something a serial killer would say.”
Seungcheol laughed and walked away. “I think you've watched too many murder mysteries. I'm not a serial killer.”
Jeonghan finally followed, pointing accusingly at his back. “Again. That's exactly what a serial killer would say. They never go, ‘Yeah, actually, that's me.’ They always deny it first.”
“So what's my motive?”
“I don't know. Maybe you're collecting socially awkward men.”
“I only know one.”
“Well congratulations. You've completed the collection.”
Seungcheol smiled as he rolled up the sleeves. “Tell me this then. Would a serial killer offer to make you brownies?”
“Absolutely. That's how they give you drugs…in brownies, tea, even water and then suddenly...” He stopped mid-sentence. “Wait ! You're offering to make me brownies?”
“Yup.”
“Like... actual brownies?”
“With vanilla ice cream.”
Jeonghan stared at him. “Oh no, no, no. That's way too much work. You don't have to do that.”
“Jeonghan, you came all the way to my clinic after work. You sat with me when I wasn't having a great day. You listened. Then you paid for dinner even though I was supposed to. After that you drove me home, and because the universe apparently has a personal vendetta against us, you never got the brownie you wanted. I already have brownie mix in the pantry, an oven that works most of the time, and vanilla ice cream in the freezer. It'll take half an hour. We can even watch one of those murder mysteries while they bake.”
Jeonghan sighed. “You're making this incredibly difficult to refuse.”
“That's the plan.”
“And it's also making me realize I'd be a terrible victim.”
“How?”
“You're basically luring me into your kitchen with desserts.”
Seungcheol laughed. “I promise there are no drugs involved.”
“You'd say that.”
“You're welcome to supervise the entire baking process.”
“...Okay.”
“Okay.”
They walked into the kitchen together, washed their hands at the sink, and Seungcheol started pulling out all the stuff he needed.
Jeonghan leaned against the counter, watching him line up the brownie mix, eggs, butter and a mixing bowl.
“You like to bake?” he asked.
“Yeah”
“Why is that attractive?”
Seungcheol looked at him.
Jeonghan looked at the ceiling. “I didn't say that out loud.”
“You did.”
“Oh.”
Wonderful.
Seungcheol smiled and cracked the first egg into the bowl.
Jeonghan watched him stir everything together for another minute before his attention drifted to the glossy chocolate batter.
“Question.”
“Mhm?”
“If I stuck one finger in there...” He pointed innocently at the bowl. “Would you yell at me?”
“I wouldn't yell.”
“Oh?”
“I'd strongly advise against it.”
Jeonghan grinned. “Better than my mom.”
“What would she do?”
“She wouldn't say anything.” Jeonghan folded his arms. “She'd just appear behind me out of nowhere, smack my hand with a wooden spoon, and ask me whether I planned on spending the night in the emergency room because I couldn't wait thirty minutes for dessert.”
Seungcheol laughed. “Did that actually happen?”
“The spoon part? Many times. The emergency room part? Never.”
“So the spoon worked.”
“It absolutely worked. To this day, if I hear a wooden spoon hit a countertop, I instinctively apologize for things I haven't even done yet.”
Seungcheol poured the batter into the baking pan before looking over. “I guess I'll have to hide my wooden spoons whenever you come over.”
Whenever you come over.
Whenever? As in... more than once? As in there will be future visits?
Seungcheol slid the pan into the oven, shut the door, and set the timer.
The timer beeped once to confirm it had started counting down.
Neither of them moved.
Jeonghan was still leaning against the kitchen island, watching Seungcheol with a fond look.
Seungcheol busied himself wiping a small streak of batter from the counter with a cloth, mostly because suddenly having something to do with his hands felt necessary.
He hadn't meant anything by it.
Whenever you come over.
It had just... come out.
Because somewhere along the way, without him noticing exactly when, the idea of Jeonghan being here again had stopped feeling hypothetical. It felt obvious and…comfortable like of course there would be a next time.
He looked up and Jeonghan was still looking at him.
Their eyes met.
Jeonghan smiled first. It was not his usual loud, panicked smile that arrived with a dozen unnecessary words. It was just a small sweet one.
“So...” Jeonghan stepped closer. “You've already imagined me coming over again?”
“I guess I have.” Seungcheol smiled. “You’re my friend and I like spending time with you”
“I like spending time with you too” Jeonghan blushed a little.
God what an expressive face. Seungcheol loved it so damn much.
Jeonghan looked away like he couldn’t hold eye contact.
His fingers drummed absentmindedly. His eyes wandered to the fridge, the fruit bowl, the little herb pots by the window. He seemed genuinely curious about everything.
Seungcheol smiled. “You're looking around like you're inspecting the place.”
Jeonghan immediately looked guilty. “I wasn't judging your kitchen!”
“I didn't say you were.”
“I was just... looking.”
“I know.”
“I like seeing where people live.”
Seungcheol smiled. “What does my kitchen say about me?”
Jeonghan actually thought about it.
“It says...” He glanced around once more, taking his time. “...you put everything back where it belongs.”
“I do.”
“You probably refill things before they run out.”
“I try.”
“You definitely have a drawer full of instruction manuals.”
Seungcheol laughed. “I do.”
“I knew it.”
“And?”
“And...” Jeonghan looked at the little magnets on the refrigerator door. Most were places Seungcheol had visited with his family years ago. One was shaped like a tiny penguin.
“You also don't throw things away very easily.”
“What makes you say that?”
Jeonghan pointed at the penguin magnet. “It looks old.”
“It is. My dad bought it for me when I was twelve.”
“Woah.” Jeonghan smiled as he walked closer to the fridge, his fingertip hovering near the tiny penguin without actually touching it. “And you still have it?”
Seungcheol nodded. “I never really saw a reason to replace it.”
“It doesn't even match the rest.”
“I know.”
“And it's chipped.”
“Mhm.”
Jeonghan looked over his shoulder with a smile. “You're kind of sentimental.”
Seungcheol laughed quietly. “Is that a bad thing?”
“No.” Jeonghan shook his head. “Actually... I think it's nice.”
He looked back at the refrigerator again, studying the little penguin like it had suddenly become very interesting.
“My apartment's the complete opposite. Every few months I decide I'm going to become a minimalist.” He counted on his fingers. “I throw out old clothes, donate books, reorganize everything, convince myself I've become a brand new person...and then two weeks later I've somehow accumulated seventeen new useless things.”
Seungcheol smiled. “So you're saying you're bad at letting clutter in.”
“Exactly.”
“I'm bad at letting things go.”
Jeonghan glanced back at him. “What kind of things?”
Seungcheol thought for a second before answering.
“Anything, really. Gifts, notes, old photos, tickets from places I liked. If something reminds me of a person or a good day...it usually stays.”
“You really keep everything?”
“Almost everything.”
Jeonghan smiled “I think that's sweet.”
“Most people call it hoarding.”
“No. Hoarding is keeping junk because you can't throw it away. This...” Jeonghan’s eyes drifted back to the penguin. “...this feels different.”
“How?”
“You don't keep things because they're useful.” He smiled. “You keep them because they meant something.”
Seungcheol wasn't sure why those words settled somewhere so deep inside him. Maybe because they were true. Maybe because Jeonghan had understood him so effortlessly.
Seungcheol looked at the old magnet. “There are people who say you should constantly move on…that holding onto old things keeps you stuck.”
“And what do you think?”
“I think if something still makes me smile years later....why would I throw it away?”
Jeonghan sighed. “I hope that nobody ever takes advantage of that.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean...people like you…the ones who stay attached to people and memories. You're... kind of trusting.” He laughed softly. “I don't know. It just feels like if someone mattered to you once... they'd probably matter to you for a really long time.”
Seungcheol held his gaze.
You have no idea.
Ten years.
Ten years, and he could still remember exactly where Jeonghan used to sit in class. Exactly what his laugh sounded like echoing down the hallway. Exactly how many times he'd almost walked over to say hello before convincing himself not to.
Jeonghan had no idea he was standing in the house of someone who had once spent years quietly loving him from the safest distance possible.
“You're probably right,” Seungcheol said. “Once someone becomes important to me..I don't think I'm very good at forgetting them.”
Jeonghan smiled, completely unaware of what those words actually meant.
“I think that's a really nice way to be.”
Seungcheol almost laughed.
You definitely wouldn't think that if you knew who I spent ten years not forgetting.
Seungcheol held his gaze for another second before forcing himself to look away.
If he stayed there any longer, standing 2 feet away in a quiet kitchen while Jeonghan smiled at him like that, he was going to make a spectacularly bad decision.
Something impulsive.
Something like closing the distance between them, kissing him, and discovering firsthand whether Jeonghan really did taste as sweet as he looked.
He shook his head as though physically dislodging the thought, and escaped into the living room before his self-control embarrassed them both.
“Let's watch a movie while we wait.”
“Okayy.”
Jeonghan followed after him without questioning the sudden change of subject.
Thank God.
Jeonghan looked around the living room. It was cozy in the lived-in way the rest of the house was.
There were two blankets folded over the arm of the couch, and a stack of medical journals, pens and colorful post-it notes sat neatly on the coffee table.
They sat down on the couch.
Seungcheol picked up the remote, turned the TV on, then handed it to Jeonghan.
“You choose.”
“Anything? You trust my taste?”
“I do.”
“That feels like a lot of responsibility.”
“I'll survive.”
Jeonghan accepted the remote with exaggerated seriousness, holding it in both hands like he'd just been appointed captain of a spaceship.
“Okay... no pressure.”
He opened netflix and immediately frowned.
“There are way too many movies. How do people pick?”
“I usually spend longer choosing than watching.”
“That makes me feel better.”
He kept scrolling, mumbling quietly to himself as titles flew past.
“No... watched that one... that one's sad... absolutely not, I cried for two days... why are there four sequels to this?... who keeps funding these?...”
Seungcheol rested his elbow on the armrest, his chin settling into his hand.
He didn't offer suggestions, he didn’t rush him either. Watching Jeonghan try to make a decision was unexpectedly entertaining all by itself.
Jeonghan would stop on one movie, stare at it with complete confidence for three seconds, then shake his head and continue scrolling because he'd suddenly remembered a review he'd read six months ago or because the poster looked “a little suspicious.”
“How long does this process usually take?” Seungcheol asked.
“I don't know.”
Another minute passed before Jeonghan suddenly gasped.
“Oh!”
“You found one?”
“I think so.”
“You don't sound convinced.”
“I'm about...83% convinced.”
“I'll take those odds.”
Jeonghan read the synopsis under his breath, nodded to himself twice like he was approving a legal contract, then finally pressed play.
“There.”
“Good choice?”
“Who knows” Jeonghan shrugged. “If it's terrible…we suffer together.”
Seungcheol smiled “okay”
The movie turned out to be surprisingly good.
Every time they thought they'd figured out who the murderer was, the story threw another suspect onto the screen.
Jeonghan had already changed his mind four times.
“No, no, it's definitely the neighbor,” he whispered with absolute confidence.
Ten minutes later the neighbor was murdered.
“Oh…well…wait ! It's the detective.”
The detective turned out to be innocent.
Jeonghan sighed. “I would've been terrible at solving crimes.”
“You're doing your best.”
“My best has arrested three innocent people.”
Seungcheol laughed.
Then...Beep. Beep. Beep.
The oven timer.
“Oh.” Seungcheol stood. “Brownies.”
Jeonghan paused the movie, and got to his feet too. “I'll help.”
Before he'd even taken a full step, Seungcheol rested a hand on his shoulder and gently pushed him back down on the couch.
“You stay.”
“But...”
“Shh.”
Then Seungcheol disappeared toward the kitchen.
Jeonghan stared after him.
Did I just get shh'd?
Why was that...attractive?
What is wrong with me?
He grabbed his phone.
JEONGHAN : JOSHUA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JOSHUA : Why are you yelling?
JEONGHAN : I'M IN HIS HOUSE !!!!! (╥﹏╥)
JOSHUA : Who?
JEONGHAN : SEUNGCHEOL'S !!!!!!!! (ﾉ◕‿◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
JEONGHAN: HE INVITED ME INSIDE !!!
JEONGHAN : WE'RE WATCHING A MOVIE ! HE'S MAKING ME BROWNIES!!!!!!!!!! (ಥ﹏ಥ)
JOSHUA : You're crying over brownies?
JEONGHAN : IT'S NOT ABOUT THE BROWNIES !!!!
JEONGHAN : IT'S ABOUT THE DOMESTIC VIBES !!
JOSHUA : You need to calm down.
JEONGHAN : I CAN'T !!!!!!
JEONGHAN : HE TOLD ME TO STAY ON THE COUCH ! AND THEN HE WENT TO GET THE BROWNIES !!!! LIKE I'M SOME PRINCESS WHO ISN'T ALLOWED TO TOUCH HOT TRAYS!!!!!!!!!! (╥ᆺ╥)
JOSHUA : I hate to break it to you…that's called being a nice host.
JEONGHAN : NO !!!!!
JEONGHAN : LET ME BE DELUSIONAL FOR FIVE MINUTES !!!
JOSHUA: did he kiss you?
JEONGHAN : NO !
JOSHUA : did you kiss him?
JEONGHAN: NO !
JOSHUA: do you want to?
JEONGHAN: ...maybe a tiny little microscopic amount. (◕‿◕✿)
JOSHUA: DO IT !
JEONGHAN: OH NO HE'S HERE !!!!! BYEEEEEEEEE
Seungcheol walked over holding a tray with a water bottle and 2 bowls of warm brownies and melting vanilla ice cream.
He set it down on the coffee table, picked up the larger bowl first and placed it carefully into Jeonghan's hands. Only then did he take the smaller one and sat beside him.
Jeonghan looked from his own bowl to Seungcheol's, then back again. “Wait... why's yours so tiny? Did you run out of batter?”
“No.” Seungcheol picked up his spoon. “I just wasn't really in the mood for dessert.”
Jeonghan stared at him. “...Then why did you bake brownies?”
Seungcheol looked up as though the answer was obvious. “For you obviously.”
Jeonghan looked down at his bowl and pouted at it, as if the brownie itself had somehow done something wrong by existing.
The sight of that ridiculous little expression made Seungcheol’s heart beat so fast.
“You’re my friend. You’re my guest. Of course I’d do anything for you. So can you eat it and let me know how it tastes?”
Jeonghan finally lifted the spoon and took a big bite. Then his whole face melted. The first sound he made was small and helpless, almost a whimper of pure satisfaction, and the words started tumbling out without any brakes at all.
“Oh my god ! Oh my god, Seungcheol, this is—this is criminal. How is this even legal? It’s still warm in the middle and the edges are a little chewy and the ice cream is melting into it just enough and I can taste the chocolate but it’s not too bitter and there’s something else, is that espresso? Did you put espresso in these? Because I think I’m in love with whoever invented espresso and also with you a little bit for putting it in brownies, wait no, not in love, I mean—anyway this is the best thing I’ve put in my mouth all year, maybe ever, and I’m not even exaggerating, I would fight someone for another one of these, I would—”
“It came from a brownie mix,” Seungcheol reminded him. “You watched me make it. I didn't exactly perform magic.”
“if I admit this came from a brownie mix...then I have to accept that I've been buying the wrong brownie mix my entire life.”
“You probably have.”
“This changes everything.”
“It really doesn't.”
“It changes my everything.”
He took another bite before Seungcheol could answer, and whatever thought had been forming immediately disappeared because Jeonghan made this tiny, completely unconscious hum.
One foot bounced against the floor, then both knees gave this little excited wiggle like his body simply couldn't keep still whenever he ate something he loved.
God.
He actually did that.
It wasn't for anyone's benefit either. Jeonghan clearly had no idea he was doing it. He wasn't performing. He wasn't trying to be funny or cute or charming. He was just... happy.
And somehow that made it infinitely worse.
Seungcheol had spent ten years convincing himself that distance was enough.
Back then, loving Jeonghan had been easy because it never demanded anything from him. He'd admired him laughing with friends, watched him cheer at school events, watched him become the kind of person everyone naturally gravitated toward. He'd built an entire first love out of stolen glances and almost-conversations. It had hurt sometimes, sure, but it had also been strangely peaceful. He'd never expected Jeonghan to know. Never expected anything back. It had simply been enough to exist in the same world.
Somewhere along the way…that had stopped being enough.
Now Jeonghan was sitting on his couch.
“This is actually unfair,” Jeonghan was mumbling to the dessert now. “You have no right to taste this good.”
He pointed his spoon accusingly at the bowl before taking another bite. “I don't even think I'm chewing anymore.”
Seungcheol smiled and ate too.
The brownie wasn’t as appetizing as Jeonghan.
God he wanted to kiss him.
The thought arrived so suddenly that Seungcheol actually looked away. It was not because he was embarrassed by it but because if he kept looking, he was afraid it would stop being just a thought.
Jeonghan had bent his head again, completely focused on digging out another spoonful, and his hair had fallen loose across his forehead, hiding one eye.
Without thinking, Seungcheol reached over. His fingers brushed against impossibly soft strands before gently tucking them behind Jeonghan's ear and gently stroked his cheek.
It took exactly one second for both of them to realize what he'd done.
Jeonghan froze exactly where he was, spoon halfway to his mouth.
His eyes lifted and met Seungcheol's….and then, right in front of him, color climbed up his neck, across his cheeks, all the way to the tips of his ears.
Completely, hopelessly red.
He looked like someone had unplugged every functioning thought inside his head.
Seungcheol's own hand slowly retreated.
What did I just do?
Jeonghan finally remembered he still had brownie in his mouth. Unfortunately, he remembered by inhaling at exactly the wrong moment.
He started coughing immediately.
Seungcheol grabbed the bottle of water off the table, twisted the cap open and held it out.
“Here.”
Jeonghan took it with both hands, still coughing, drinking too quickly before stopping to catch his breath.
For one awful second Seungcheol wondered if he'd actually killed him.
“Sorry” he said quietly.
Jeonghan looked up over the bottle.
“For... what?”
“For...” Seungcheol’s voice shook, suddenly feeling far less composed than he usually managed to be. “Your hair kept falling into your face.”
Jeonghan looked away so fast. His ears were still bright red.
“Uh... um...thanks. Yeah…hair... hair in your face is dangerous. It can... you know...” He made a vague gesture toward his eye. “Poke your eye or... distract you while you're eating. That's... that's a genuine hazard.”
Seungcheol bit the inside of his cheek.
Jeonghan kept going.
“So...” Jeonghan chuckled, still refusing to look directly at him. “I guess you were just... doing your job. Preventing a medical emergency before it happened. Very responsible of you.”
“It was a close call.”
“It really was.”
Seungcheol cleared his throat. “We should probably finish the movie”
Jeonghan nodded a little too quickly. “Right.”
Seungcheol picked up the remote and unpaused the movie.
Jeonghan had absolutely no idea what was happening anymore.
Well.
He knew what was happening on the television. There was a detective standing in someone's kitchen explaining blood spatter while three suspicious family members looked increasingly guilty.
He had no idea what was happening inside his own head.
This was.. weird.
Jeonghan glanced sideways.
Seungcheol was watching the movie, one arm resting lazily along the back of the couch, completely focused on the screen.
How does he always look this comfortable?
He stabbed another tiny piece of brownie with his spoon.
Don't look at him.
Three seconds later he looked again.
This is becoming a problem.
Twenty minutes later the detective on screen was mid-confrontation when Jeonghan felt the weight of Seungcheol’s head falling on his shoulder.
He froze so completely that even his breathing stopped for a second.
For a few stunned heartbeats he sat perfectly still, eyes locked on the television without seeing a single frame, every nerve ending suddenly loud and useless.
Then Seungcheol’s breathing evened out and Jeonghan realized with a jolt that he had actually fallen asleep.
No, no, no.
Do I move?
Don't move. Definitely don't move.
But what if his neck starts hurting?
What if my shoulder starts shaking because I'm panicking?
What if he can hear my heartbeat?
Can people hear heartbeats through shoulders?
Jeonghan stared at him for another few seconds, waiting for some sign that this was a joke.
Nothing.
The movie continued playing.
Seungcheol slept on. Today had started with him carrying the weight of terrible news for one of his patients. Then he'd stayed late at the clinic, walked to dinner, tried to cheer himself up for Jeonghan's sake, and somehow still found the energy to bake brownies.
No wonder he'd fallen asleep.
Jeonghan looked back at the TV, but the words had dissolved into meaningless noise.
He didn't dare move an inch.
If this was the price of having Seungcheol asleep against his shoulder...he decided he could happily sit there forever.
~
Next morning~
Seungcheol opened his eyes and noticed the blanket.
He frowned.
He definitely hadn't gone to sleep with a blanket.
For a few seconds he just lay there, blinking slowly at the ceiling while his brain struggled to catch up.
He rubbed a hand over his face and reached for his phone.
6:30 a.m.
“...What?”
He pushed himself upright. His neck should've hurt after sleeping on the couch, but strangely... it didn't. He actually felt rested.
Then another thought hit him.
“Jeonghan?” he called.
There was no response.
“When did he leave….?”
Something bright yellow caught his eye.
A tiny Post-it note was stuck to the coffee table.
Seungcheol leaned forward, peeled it off carefully
A ridiculous amount of tiny hearts and smiling emoticons surrounded the edges.
He smiled before he'd even started reading.
Good morning, Dr. Cheollie (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ
You fell asleep around 10:30...
I thought, “Awww he's tired. I'll wait until he wakes up.”
So I waited..and waited...and waited some more...it is now almost midnight.
I covered you with a blanket because you looked cold.
I also washed the bowls!! Please don't yell at me!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ
The leftover brownie is in your fridge because wasting brownie is illegal. (◕︵◕)
I would've stayed longer honestly, but I have to be at work at 7 and this week is going to be super busy.
Thank you for inviting me over. I had a really really nice time !! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ
- Jeonghannie (◕‿◕✿)
Seungcheol stared at the note for a long moment before letting it fall into his lap.
Then he slowly covered his face with one hand.
“...Why the fuck did I fall asleep?”
Out of every possible outcome, out of every scenario he'd imagined after finally inviting Jeonghan inside his house. He had...fallen asleep.
He groaned quietly and leaned back against the couch.
Then, as his embarrassment slowly settled, another memory floated back with startling clarity.
His brain replayed it in painful detail. He remembered feeling impossibly tired, remembered the movie blurring, remembered something warm supporting him without moving away. Then... nothing.
Fuck did I fall asleep on him !?
He looked down at the note and somehow his embarrassment turned into a smile.
He folded the note as carefully as if it might tear from one wrong movement, slipped it into his wallet behind the business cards.
Maybe he really did have a problem.
Once he loved something, it was very hard to let it go.
~
Jeonghan had been at work for less than two hours, and he was already negotiating with the universe.
“No, listen to me,” he said, one hand pressed dramatically against his forehead while the other pointed at the framed painting leaning against the wall. “I'm not saying your artist is wrong. I'm saying somebody gave me the wrong measurements. There is a difference.”
The man across from him frowned. “It's only five centimeters.”
Jeonghan laughed because he was one inconvenience away from lying down on the gallery floor.
“Only?” He looked around the room as if searching for a witness. “Did everyone hear that? He said ‘only five centimeters.’ Buddy, my boss is the kind of person who can spot a crooked frame from twenty meters away. Five centimeters isn't a difference. Five centimeters is my resignation letter.”
The man opened his mouth again.
Jeonghan held up both hands.
“No, no. Don't explain it to me. Explain it to my boss. Better yet, call your artist. Have your artist explain it to my boss. They can all get into one big group chat together because I am removing myself from this narrative.”
“Can’t you make it fit?”
Jeonghan groaned. “How could I possibly make it fit ! am I a magician !?”
“Yoon” he heard his coworker’s voice behind him. “Someone’s here to see you.”
Jeonghan rubbed the ache in his shoulder without looking up. “Please tell me that's my coffee. If that's my coffee, I'll forgive everyone in this building.”
He turned and then completely forgot what he'd been annoyed about.
Standing near the entrance, was Seungcheol. He was holding a small paper bag in one hand, looking just a little uncertain about whether he should've come inside.
“Oh my god.” The squeak left Jeonghan's mouth before he could stop it.
He immediately turned back to his coworker.
“Can you please handle this? Please explain to this man why five centimeters is enough to destroy my career.”
She laughed.
“I've got it.” Then her eyes flicked toward Seungcheol. “You go talk to your cute boyfriend.”
“Shh! Not boyfriend!”
She winked. “Not yet?”
He made a strangled noise and ran across the gallery floor, stopping just short of crashing into Seungcheol.
“Hiiii.” The greeting came out much brighter than he'd intended. “What are you doing here?”
Instead of answering, Seungcheol tilted his head. “Does nobody ever visit you at work?”
Jeonghan blinked.
“She just now assumed I was your boyfriend.” Seungcheol said
Oh no.
“You heard that?”
Seungcheol nodded. “Yep. It echoed.”
Jeonghan slowly covered his face with one hand. “I've had enough embarrassment for one lifetime.”
“I also heard you arguing.”
Jeonghan sighed. “And?”
“To be honest...” Seungcheol's smile appeared slowly. “I'm on your side.”
Jeonghan lowered his hand. “You are?”
“Mhm.”
“Really?”
“Five centimeters is a huge difference !”
Jeonghan pointed at him “THANK YOU !”
Across the room, his coworker caught his eye and gave him the most unbearably smug look imaginable.
Jeonghan immediately looked away.
Nope. Not dealing with that.
He caught Seungcheol's hand by the wrist, and started leading him away from the receiving area before remembering halfway there that he was, in fact, holding Seungcheol.
Too late now. Pretend this is normal.
He stopped in the quieter reception area near the windows before finally letting go.
“Sooo...” he asked, rocking back on his heels. “What brings you here?”
Seungcheol didn't answer. Instead, his eyes dropped toward Jeonghan's shoulder.
“I saw you rubbing it. Does it hurt?”
Jeonghan instinctively touched it again. “no”
Seungcheol looked guilty.
“I'm really sorry about last night. I didn't even realize I'd fallen asleep until this morning. I promise I have better manners than that. I was just exhausted, and you...” He stopped, looking almost frustrated with himself. “I should've stayed awake.”
Jeonghan smiled “No, Seungcheol. You had a rough day. You trusted me enough to fall asleep. I actually... I had a really nice time.”
“Oh…okay…” Then he remembered the paper bag and held it out. “This was actually why I came.”
Jeonghan accepted it curiously. “What is it?”
He looked inside.
Seungcheol awkwardly rubbed his neck. “It’s the leftover brownie….and I bought a new brownie mix because you liked it…yesterday you said you'd been buying the wrong brownie mix your whole life, so... now you know which one to get.”
For a second Jeonghan just stared at him. His brain understood the words but his heart was having a much harder time.
It wasn't an expensive gift, it wasn't grand or romantic or dramatic….it was a box of brownie mix. Anyone else looking at it would probably think it was nothing.
But someone had listened, someone had remembered one throwaway sentence he'd said the night before, someone had taken time out of their morning, come all the way to his workplace before starting work themselves, just to hand him a brownie mix because he'd liked it.
He looked back into the bag, then at Seungcheol again, blinking several times because his vision had gone annoyingly blurry.
“Oh my god…Seungcheol...this is genuinely one of the nicest things anyone's ever done for me.”
Seungcheol looked panicked. “Are you crying?”
Jeonghan shook his head too fast, still blinking. “No?”
Seungcheol felt his own tears rise up just by looking at jeonghan’s tears and took a step back like distance might keep it from spilling over. “So… um… yeah. I should get to work. Bye. Have a nice day.”
Jeonghan stepped forward before either of them could invent another excuse and wrapped his arms around him.
Seungcheol froze completely. His hands stayed useless at his sides.
Jeonghan didn’t move away. He just held on, face pressed lightly against Seungcheol’s shoulder.
A few seconds passed….then a few more. When Jeonghan finally pulled back his eyes were glassy and a soft sniffle escaped before he could stop it.
“Thank you, Seungcheol. I appreciate you so much.”
Seungcheol stayed locked in place, heart beating so loud he was sure the whole gallery could hear it.
He nodded stiffly. “I appreciate you too…” He patted Jeonghan’s shoulder awkwardly. “Bye.”
He turned and walked away faster than necessary, every step screaming at him.
Fuck. Why didn’t I hug back? What was that stupid shoulder pat? Idiot. He almost cried over a brownie mix, he hugged you like it meant something, and you stood there like a statue and patted his shoulder. Pathetic !
Jeonghan watched him go, still clutching the bag to his chest
The second Seungcheol disappeared through the glass doors he pulled out his phone with slightly shaky fingers.
JEONGHAN: JOSHUA !!!!!!!
JEONGHAN: HE CAME TO MY WORK JUST TO GIVE ME THE LEFTOVER BROWNIE AND HE BOUGHT ME THE SAME BROWNIE MIX BECAUSE I SAID I LIKED IT !!! (◕‿◕✿)
JEONGHAN: I think I accidentally scared him by hugging him. 😭
JOSHUA: I'll pick you up at lunch. We're going ring shopping. Then we'll book your wedding venue.
JOSHUA: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
JEONGHAN: You're actually insane. (◕_◕)
JOSHUA: what do you mean you scared him by hugging him?
JEONGHAN: I don’t know ! it was weird ! He just... stood there…like this 🧍
JOSHUA : damn that’s bad
JEONGHAN: I KNOWWWWWWW (◕︵◕✿)
JOSHUA: So….wedding shopping today?
JEONGHAN: Let's goooooo!!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
JOSHUA: YAYY !! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
★
Few days later~
JEONGHAN: Dr. Cheollie, medical question (◕︿◕✿)
SEUNGCHEOL: That sounds serious.
JEONGHAN: My shoulder hurts.
SEUNGCHEOL: How badly?
JEONGHAN: Not badly badly. It just hurts when I move it. I iced it but it still hurts.
A second later, another message came through.
Image.
Seungcheol got a cropped picture of Jeonghan’s bare shoulder, the skin slightly red from whatever he had done to it. Seungcheol could also see the sharp collarbone.
Seungcheol stared at it for a second longer than he should have.
He was a doctor. He knew exactly what he was supposed to be looking at.
Redness, swelling, any obvious injury. But unfortunately, his brain had apparently decided to notice everything else first.
He shook his head and texted.
SEUNGCHEOL: How did you hurt it?
JEONGHAN: ...
JEONGHAN: I may have done something stupid.
SEUNGCHEOL: What did you do?
JEONGHAN: I had to open my bedroom door. It wouldn't open so I had to use my shoulder.
SEUNGCHEOL: How many times?
JEONGHAN: this feels like a medical interrogation
SEUNGCHEOL: How many times?
JEONGHAN: enough that the door opened
SEUNGCHEOL: That’s not a number.
JEONGHAN: 12
Seungcheol put his phone down for a second and rubbed his face.
SEUNGCHEOL: You hurt your shoulder because you repeatedly rammed it into a door.
JEONGHAN: when you say it like that it sounds bad
SEUNGCHEOL: How else should I say it?
JEONGHAN: “Jeonghan bravely overcame an obstacle using his physical strength”
SEUNGCHEOL: I don’t think that’s medically accurate.
JEONGHAN: you're supposed to support your patients
SEUNGCHEOL: You’re not my patient.
JEONGHAN: emotionally I am
SEUNGCHEOL: What happened to the door?
JEONGHAN: that's the WORST PART
JEONGHAN: Joshua came over and said he could fix it
SEUNGCHEOL: That sounds promising.
JEONGHAN: no it doesn't
SEUNGCHEOL: Why?
JEONGHAN: because now it doesn't close at all !! before, it was just stuck ! now it's basically a wall with hinges
SEUNGCHEOL: oh no…
JEONGHAN: And do you know what makes this worse?
SEUNGCHEOL: What?
JEONGHAN: I bought a really expensive toolbox for this ! It has everything ! Every screwdriver, every little wrench…things I don't even know the names of.
JEONGHAN: I saw it and thought, “I'm an adult now. I can fix things.” (◕◡◕✿)
JEONGHAN: And now it sits under my sink while my bedroom door is trying to kill me.
SEUNGCHEOL: Maybe the toolbox isn't the problem.
JEONGHAN: Don't defend the toolbox.
SEUNGCHEOL: I'm not.
JEONGHAN: It betrayed me.
SEUNGCHEOL: I'll stay out of it.
JEONGHAN: Thank you.
JEONGHAN: I just needed someone to hear about my suffering.
SEUNGCHEOL: I'm glad you told me.
Jeonghan stared at his phone with a smile. There was something about Seungcheol's way of talking to him that had changed lately, or maybe Jeonghan was only beginning to notice it. He never made him feel silly for talking too much. He never rushed him. Even when Jeonghan was complaining about something as stupid as a broken bedroom door, Seungcheol listened as though there was nowhere else he'd rather be.
JEONGHAN: Are you doing anything Saturday eve?
SEUNGCHEOL: Nope !
JEONGHAN: I was thinking we could go out.
SEUNGCHEOL : Let’s go. I’ll pick you up.
JEONGHAN: okay (◕‿◕✿)
SEUNGCHEOL: Ice your shoulder again for about 15 minutes. Wrap the ice pack in a towel so it isn’t directly against your skin, and give your shoulder some rest tonight. Try not to lift anything heavy or make any movements that make the pain worse. If it gets more painful, starts swelling, or you have trouble moving your arm normally, let me know or go to a hospital.
JEONGHAN: Yes, doctor. (◕◡◕✿)
SEUNGCHEOL: Be responsible.
JEONGHAN: No promises. (◕︿◕✿)
SEUNGCHEOL: Jeonghan.
JEONGHAN: I’m kiddingggg.
JEONGHAN: I’ll listen. Promise. (◕‿◕)
JEONGHAN: Goodnight !!!
SEUNGCHEOL: Goodnight, Jeonghan. Take care of that shoulder.
JEONGHAN: yes doctor (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
★
Saturday~
Seungcheol rang the doorbell while feeling nervous.
He had been looking forward to tonight all week, which was embarrassing enough on its own, but he had also spent an unreasonable amount of time thinking about what they might do, what they might talk about, whether Jeonghan would be tired after work, whether the restaurant would be good.
He was a grown man going to dinner with someone he liked. There was no reason to feel like a teenager again.
The door opened.
Seungcheol forgot whatever thought had been halfway through his head.
Jeonghan stood there trying to put an earring into one ear, his hair slightly messy from getting ready, dressed in white pants and a loose baby-blue shirt that somehow made him look even softer than usual.
There was something about the whole picture that caught Seungcheol completely off guard. He just stood there, staring.
“a-are we going somewhere fancy?”
“I don’t know if it’s fancy” Jeonghan said as he finally put on the earring. “It’s a really good Italian restaurant. My friend works there, so she was able to get me a reservation. Cool, right?”
Seungcheol nodded, although he was still looking at him.
God.
How was he supposed to act normal when Jeonghan looked like this?
There was nothing complicated about what he was feeling. It wasn’t even particularly new. That was probably the problem.
He had spent years knowing that Jeonghan was beautiful, years quietly carrying that fact around without ever expecting anything from it. Back then, it had been easy to admire him from a distance because Jeonghan had belonged to a world Seungcheol had never thought he could enter. He had watched him laugh with friends, watched him move through crowded hallways like he belonged everywhere, watched people gather around him without ever wondering whether Jeonghan might one day look back.
Now he was standing three feet away, in Seungcheol’s life, smiling at him so…beautifully.
Seungcheol still didn’t quite know what to do with that.
Jeonghan had always been beautiful, but adulthood had changed something about him.
There was a softness now that Seungcheol noticed more than anything else. Maybe it was the way Jeonghan smiled when he was genuinely happy, or the way his face gave away every thought before he had time to hide it. Maybe it was simply that Seungcheol finally knew the person behind the face he had spent so many years admiring.
“You look...” Seungcheol swallowed, suddenly aware that he had been silent for too long. “You look really good.”
Jeonghan’s cheeks turned pink. “Thank you ! So do you !”
Seungcheol glanced down at himself, suddenly wishing he had put more thought into what he was wearing.
“Oh, please I look nothing compared to you. I mean, I look fine, but you look... I don’t know. I wish I’d dressed better.”
“No, no.” Jeonghan shook his head quickly. “You look so good. Seriously. Like, extremely good.”
Seungcheol laughed. “Thanks.”
Jeonghan stepped aside and waved him in. “Welcome to my apartment.”
Seungcheol stepped inside and took off his shoes by the door. The apartment was small, but comfortable, with little things scattered around that made it unmistakably Jeonghan’s.
“It looks pretty cozy.”
Jeonghan gave him a look. “That’s what people say when they see a tiny place.”
“No, really. It’s cute.” Seungcheol glanced toward the kitchen “And I’m still dying to see those drawings on your fridge. The ones Nabi made.”
“You still remember those?”
“Of course I remember. I saw it in the photos you sent me but I I wanna see it in person”
Jeonghan smiled, closing the door behind him. “Come on. Lower your expectations.”
They walked into the kitchen, and there they were.
The drawings covered a good part of the refrigerator, held up by pretty magnets.
Seungcheol smiled. “It looks really pretty up close.”
“I told you she was talented,” Jeonghan said, standing beside him.
“She definitely has a very specific style.”
“She drew horns for me because I’m naughty.” Jeonghan mumbled. “I’m not even naughty”
Seungcheol chuckled and turned to look at Jeonghan who was struggling to put on a necklace.
He looked really beautiful even then.
Seungcheol turned back to the drawings.
It was probably better to let him figure it out himself.
But the struggle kept happening in the corner of his vision—the little frustrated tug, the way Jeonghan’s shoulders shifted, the soft sound of metal against metal that never quite caught.
After a while it became impossible to ignore.
“Do you… want help?”
Jeonghan turned his head slightly. “Yeah…please”
He turned around.
Seungcheol stepped closer and carefully brushed the hair at the nape of Jeonghan’s neck aside.
The strands were soft and stubborn, they curled right back into place the second his fingers left them. He tried again and got the same result.
“Your hair doesn’t want to cooperate.”
“It never does.”
Jeonghan gathered it up himself and held it in one hand, passing the chain back to Seungcheol. “Here.”
Seungcheol took it carefully, trying not to think about how close he was.
His fingers felt steadier than the rest of him. He put the clasp slowly, hyper-aware of every millimeter of skin just beneath his hands.
He could see the tips of Jeonghan’s ears.
They were bright red.
Seungcheol had to look away for a second.
God, he really was expressive. Everything showed. Embarrassment, excitement, nervousness, happiness. Jeonghan could probably walk into a room and tell Seungcheol exactly how he was feeling without saying a word.
Seungcheol stepped back.
Jeonghan immediately let his hair fall and turned around, but he didn’t look directly at him. “Thanks !”
Then, before Seungcheol could say anything, Jeonghan grabbed his phone and headed toward the door. “Let’s goooo!”
Seungcheol followed. “How’s your shoulder?”
Jeonghan turned around. “It’s fine.”
“Lift your arm above your head.”
Jeonghan obeyed. The movement was almost smooth until the last few inches. He winced a little.
“See? Fine!”
Seungcheol gave him a look that made it very clear he was not buying it. “Can I touch your shoulder?”
That should have been a completely normal question. It was a medical question. Seungcheol was a doctor. Jeonghan knew this. There was absolutely no reason for his brain to suddenly go completely blank.
He bit his lips and nodded. “Yeah.”
Seungcheol stepped closer.
Oh…okay.
That was closer than Jeonghan had expected.
Seungcheol placed one hand gently against his shoulder, his expression changing almost immediately into a calm, focused look. There was nothing strange about it from his side.
He was completely professional, asking where it hurt, whether the pain was worse when Jeonghan lifted his arm, whether it hurt when he moved it forward or backward.
Jeonghan, meanwhile, was having a private crisis.
It had been a long time since an attractive man had touched him like this. An embarrassingly long time, actually. Joshua didn’t count because Joshua was Joshua, and after years of friendship there was no mystery left there.
But this was Seungcheol.
Seungcheol, who was standing close enough that Jeonghan could smell his cologne, with one hand resting carefully against his shoulder while his thumb moved slightly as he checked the area.
Please behave.
It was just a shoulder examination.
A completely normal shoulder examination.
He was not going to make some pathetic little noise because a handsome doctor touched him. He had dignity. He was an adult. He could answer a few simple questions without sounding like his brain had been replaced with warm soup.
“Does it hurt here?”
“A little.”
“Here?”
“Yeah. More there.”
“What about when I press here?”
Jeonghan inhaled slowly through his nose. “That’s... fine.”
Seungcheol moved his hand slightly, checking another spot. “And here?”
Jeonghan stared very hard at the wall behind Seungcheol’s head. “That hurts.”
“How much?”
“4/10”
Seungcheol nodded, still completely composed. “Okay.”
Jeonghan was beginning to resent how calm he was.
How could one person look that professional while Jeonghan was standing there trying not to turn bright red over a hand on his shoulder? It wasn’t fair.
He wanted to ask if Seungcheol could maybe stop looking so serious because it was making everything worse, but that would require admitting there was a problem, and the problem was absolutely not his shoulder.
Seungcheol finally stepped back, and Jeonghan immediately missed the warmth of his hand, which was a thought he firmly decided he would never acknowledge again.
“We’re going to the hospital,” Seungcheol said.
Jeonghan stared at him. “What?”
“You need to see an orthopedic doctor. Come on.”
“Nooooo Cheollie, please. The dinner. I wanna gooo.”
Seungcheol opened his mouth, probably ready to argue, but then stopped.
Jeonghan noticed the tiny change in his expression.
But there was something about the way he was looking at him now that made Jeonghan suddenly self-conscious. Then it clicked.
He had said Cheollie.
Not Doctor Cheollie…just Cheollie.
Oh…that was probably why.
Seungcheol looked away for a second, trying to get himself back under control. He had heard Jeonghan say that name countless times in texts, always followed by some ridiculous little complaint or question, but hearing it like that had caught him off guard. It was softer without the title.
He looked back at Jeonghan, who was standing there with his lips pushed into a small pout, clearly trying to negotiate his way out of a hospital visit.
Seungcheol had this sudden, almost ridiculous urge to pull a blanket around him, sit him down somewhere comfortable, and make sure nothing in the world could bother him for the rest of the night.
It was becoming a problem, how badly he wanted to take care of him.
“Tomorrow,” Jeonghan said, tugging lightly at Seungcheol’s sleeve. “I promise. I’ll go tomorrow. I just really want to have dinner with you tonight. We planned this.”
Seungcheol looked down at his hand on his sleeve, then back at his face.
He knew he should insist. He knew he probably should take him to a hospital tonight, just to be safe.
But Jeonghan was looking at him like the dinner mattered.
And, selfishly, it mattered to Seungcheol too.
He sighed. “Fine let’s go to dinner”
Jeonghan’s whole face brightened. “Really?”
Seungcheol nodded. “But tomorrow you’re going to see an orthopedic doctor.”
“I will.”
“And today if you have weakness, numbness, significant swelling, or the pain suddenly gets much worse, we’re not waiting until tomorrow.”
Jeonghan nodded obediently. “Okay.”
Seungcheol narrowed his eyes. “You’re actually listening?”
“Yes, doctor.”
“Good.”
Jeonghan smiled. “Can we go eat now?”
Seungcheol shook his head, but he was smiling too. “Yes. Let’s go.”
They put their shoes on and stepped outside together, and Jeonghan was still thinking about the way Seungcheol had touched his shoulder, still painfully aware of how warm his hand had felt, and he had a terrible suspicion that he was going to spend the entire dinner pretending he wasn’t thinking about it.
~
The restaurant was much more romantic than either of them had expected.
Seungcheol knew that the moment they were shown to their table. The place was warm and dim, with small candles between the tables and soft lights hanging above them. There were flowers in little glass vases, quiet music playing somewhere in the background, and the whole place had that atmosphere of somewhere people went when they wanted dinner to mean something.
Oh, no.
Seungcheol sat down across from Jeonghan and immediately wished he could disappear for five minutes.
Because Jeonghan looked beautiful in normal lighting. Seungcheol already had enough trouble with that. But here, with the candlelight catching against his face and making his eyes look softer, with his pale blue shirt and the little necklace sitting against his collarbone, he looked almost unfair.
Seungcheol stared for half a second too long before forcing himself to look down at the menu.
This was bad.
This was very, very bad.
He could already feel warmth creeping up his neck. His palms were suddenly too warm. His heart was beating harder than it had any reason to, and he had absolutely no idea what to do with himself.
He shifted in his chair, adjusted his sleeve, picked up the menu, put it down again.
Then Jeonghan started apologizing.
“I’m really sorry,” he said, looking around the restaurant. “I swear I didn’t know it was going to be like this. I just looked at the reviews and the food looked really good, and my friend said the place was nice, but I thought she meant nice like the food is nice. I didn’t realize there were candles and flowers and all this. I promise I didn’t pick it because it looked romantic or anything. I would never deliberately bring you somewhere like this without telling you. I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable.”
Seungcheol looked up at him.
He wanted to tell him that he was uncomfortable, but not because of the restaurant. Not even remotely.
He was uncomfortable because Jeonghan was sitting across from him looking like that, and Seungcheol was suddenly having a very hard time remembering how to behave like a normal adult.
“I’m fine,” he said, hoping his voice sounded steady. “This isn’t bad. Let’s just eat some good food, okay? Don’t worry about it.”
Jeonghan hesitated before nodding.
Seungcheol smiled at him, but the moment Jeonghan looked back down at the menu, Seungcheol had to exhale slowly through his nose.
Jeonghan stared at the menu without actually reading a single word.
He could feel it.
Something was wrong.
Seungcheol kept looking away, shifting in his seat, touching his water glass more often than necessary. He was being perfectly kind, perfectly normal, but Jeonghan knew him well enough now to notice the little things.
And maybe this was it…maybe he had finally pushed too far.
He had been doing it ever since they met, hadn't he? Making comments about how handsome Seungcheol was. Calling him cute. Flirting and then pretending he wasn't flirting. Sending him ridiculous messages. Saying things like “potential soulmates” and “I love you, platonic” because apparently his mouth had never once learned self-preservation.
Maybe Seungcheol had been humoring him because he was nice.
Maybe all those little moments Jeonghan had taken as signs had only been Seungcheol being patient with a socially disastrous friend.
And now he had brought him to a candlelit restaurant.
Of course Seungcheol was uncomfortable.
He hadn't meant to trap him into anything. He really hadn't. He just wanted to spend time with him. Somehow, somewhere along the way, he had started wanting that a little too much.
Jeonghan swallowed and lowered his menu a little. “Maybe we should've gone somewhere more casual”
Seungcheol looked up.
Jeonghan forced a small smile and looked back at the menu. “I really didn't mean for this to look like... you know.”
Seungcheol reached across the table before he could think too much about it. His fingers settled gently over Jeonghan’s hand.
“Jeonghan, stop overthinking.”
Jeonghan’s fingers went still and he was still looking down. “Sorry”
“No. Stop apologizing, please. There’s nothing to apologize for. I’m happy you were excited about this place and that you actually looked up reviews and got a reservation. This place is fine. I’ve been craving Italian food anyway, so let’s just try it here, okay? Let’s have a good night.”
“Kay.”
Seungcheol gave his hand a small squeeze. “Say it with a smile.”
Jeonghan finally looked up. The smile he gave him was a little shy, but it was real. “Kay.”
It felt like an arrow through Seungcheol’s heart.
He smiled back before slowly letting go, though he had to make himself do it.
After that, they ordered food and gradually stopped thinking about the restaurant at all.
Once they had something to talk about besides the fact that they were sitting beneath candlelight in what was very obviously a romantic little corner of the city, everything felt familiar again.
Jeonghan told him about work, about a ridiculous problem with a shipment that had apparently become everyone’s problem except the person who had actually caused it, and
Seungcheol asked questions at the right places, and Jeonghan kept going, his hands moving as he talked, his expression changing with every part of the story.
Every now and then, Seungcheol would look at him for a second too long.
Then he would realize he had stopped listening.
It was becoming embarrassing.
Jeonghan was having the exact same problem.
He would be talking, completely absorbed in whatever story he was telling, and then Seungcheol would smile at something he said. Jeonghan would catch his expression, and suddenly forget the rest of his sentence.
His eyes would stay on Seungcheol for a few seconds before he remembered himself and hurriedly continued, usually with a slightly different topic because he had forgotten where he was going with the first one.
The food was genuinely good, which felt like a small victory considering their track record.
There was something strangely intimate about the way they had started talking to each other.
Their voices naturally softened whenever they leaned closer across the table. They listened instead of waiting for their turn to speak.
They reached for the same dish at one point and both stopped, laughed quietly, and let the other take it first.
They shared dessert afterward, mostly because Jeonghan wanted to try it and Seungcheol had said he would have some if Jeonghan did. Their spoons kept ending up in the same place, and once their fingers brushed when they both reached for the plate. Neither pulled away immediately.
It lasted maybe a second, but Jeonghan's eyes lifted to his and Seungcheol's breath caught before they both looked down again.
It was ridiculous.
They could call it dinner. They could have called it an evening out. They could have come up with a dozen other words for it if they wanted to.
But somewhere underneath all of those excuses, they both knew what this felt like.
It felt like a date.
This was different from every other time they had hung out.
Even their soft eye contact lasted longer which was crazy because Jeonghan would usually panic and look away but tonight, he kept looking into Seungcheol’s eyes with those soft round eyes.
This hangout felt more intimate and it had nothing to do with the candles and everything to do with the simple, terrifying fact that being here with each other felt more like a real date than any actual date either of them had ever been on.
When the bill came Jeonghan reached for it immediately, but Seungcheol was faster. He paid without letting Jeonghan argue too hard.
They finally stepped out of the restaurant.
Seungcheol glanced at Jeonghan and…Jeonghan was already looking at him. Neither said anything. They just smiled and started walking together.
~
By the time Seungcheol pulled up outside Jeonghan’s apartment building, neither of them seemed particularly interested in ending the night.
They had already said goodbye once in the car, then somehow kept talking for another ten minutes, and eventually Jeonghan had gotten out.
He stood beside the open car door for a moment, then leaned down again. “Do you want to come upstairs for a bit? I feel kind of bad because when you came to pick me up I basically rushed us out…So, you know, come up properly this time. I have water…and fruit…let me be a good host this time.”
“Okay.” Seungcheol smiled.
He got out of the car and walked into the building with Jeonghan.
They took the elevator upstairs together, standing side by side in the small space.
It should have been completely ordinary. They had ridden elevators together before. They had walked beside each other for weeks. Seungcheol had touched his shoulder, held his hand, fixed his necklace, fallen asleep against him. None of those things should have made standing this close feel different.
But it did.
Jeonghan became suddenly aware of everything. The faint scent of Seungcheol’s cologne, the warmth coming from his arm whenever they moved slightly with the elevator. He kept his eyes on the numbers above the door because looking anywhere else felt dangerous.
Then he caught Seungcheol’s reflection looking at him. Their eyes met in the mirror and either of them looked away immediately.
Nothing happened though.
Seungcheol simply looked at him quietly and Jeonghan felt a little flutter in his stomach. His gaze dropped to Seungcheol’s mouth for a second before he caught himself and looked back at the elevator doors.
Okay that was new…very new.
He pretended to fix the sleeve of his shirt.
Beside him, Seungcheol said nothing. But his eyes stayed on Jeonghan for another moment before he finally looked forward too.
When the elevator doors opened, they stepped out and walked down the short hallway. Jeonghan unlocked the door and pushed it open.
The second they were inside Jeonghan headed straight for the kitchen.
“What kind of fruit do you like? I have grapes and oranges and I think there might be strawberries somewhere, although they might be dead by now. Actually, don’t eat those if they look suspicious. I can wash the grapes or cut an orange and—”
“Just water is fine.”
Jeonghan came back with a glass.
Seungcheol took it. “Thanks.”
He drank slowly.
Jeonghan didn't know why he was watching him drink water. It was water. People drank water every day. There was absolutely nothing interesting about watching a grown man drink water.
Except Seungcheol kept looking at him while he did it.
Jeonghan’s face started getting warm.
He looked away first.
When Seungcheol finished, he lowered the glass and held it out. Jeonghan took it, their fingers brushed briefly.
“I was actually hoping you’d invite me in.” Seungcheol said, rolling up his sleeves.
Jeonghan looked at his forearm veins. “You hoped?”
Seungcheol looked at his bedroom “We can... you know...”
Jeonghan’s voice came out higher than usual. “HuH?”
“We can fix that door…or well, I’ll fix it. You just bring me the toolbox and stay at a safe distance so you don’t hurt something else.”
Jeonghan stared at him for a couple of long seconds while his brain caught up.
Ohhhh that was what he meant.
Of course that was what he meant ! What else would he have meant?
Why had Jeonghan’s brain immediately gone somewhere else? Why had he stood there staring at Seungcheol like he had just proposed something completely different? He needed to get himself together.
“Oh… um… you wanna fix my door?”
“I promise I’ll do it better than Joshua. Actually, I promise I won’t mess it up more than he did.”
Jeonghan whined. “Heyyyy, he tried his best.”
“I’ll try my best too.”
Jeonghan hesitated. “I don’t know… you already picked me up, paid for food, dropped me off. I can’t make you fix my door too.”
Seungcheol shook his head. “I want to do it. So can I please?”
Jeonghan looked at him for a long moment. The quiet sincerity in Seungcheol’s face made it hard to keep saying no. Finally he nodded.
“Okay… you can try. But if it’s too much work, you can just give up. I don’t want you to hurt yourself or something.”
Seungcheol smiled. “Okay.”
Five minutes later Jeonghan was leaning against the wall just outside the bedroom doorway, arms crossed, watching Seungcheol work.
Seungcheol had already taken the door off its hinges and was kneeling on the floor with the toolbox open beside him.
There was something painfully attractive about watching someone do something with complete confidence, especially when that someone was Seungcheol.
Jeonghan’s brain was not being normal about this.
Oh god. This was a manly man.
No offense to Joshua, who had tried his absolute best and only made the door worse, but this… this was different.
Seungcheol didn't complain about the stupid door or sigh dramatically at the toolbox. He just looked at the problem, figured out what needed to be done, and quietly got on with it.
Jeonghan had never realized how attractive competence could be until now, which was unfortunate information to discover while standing in his own bedroom doorway staring at a man he already had a ridiculous crush on.
“You're staring.”
Jeonghan straightened slightly. “I’m supervising.”
“Uh-huh” Seungcheol smirked while looking at the door. “How am I doing?”
“s-still deciding”
Seungcheol smiled and kept working.
Jeonghan's eyes wandered back to Seungcheol's hands.
He really needed to stop doing that.
Except then Seungcheol shifted closer to the door, one knee brushing the edge of Jeonghan's shoe as he reached for something in the toolbox. It was barely anything, just a brief touch, but neither of them moved immediately.
Jeonghan looked down at where they had touched, then back at Seungcheol.
“Sorry,” Seungcheol murmured, moving his knee away.
“It’s fine.”
Seungcheol looked up at him and their eyes met in a soft yet intense way.
Jeonghan suddenly became very aware that they were alone in his apartment, that it was late, that Seungcheol was so close enough that he could reach out and touch him without even taking a step.
Neither of them did.
Seungcheol eventually looked away and returned to the hinge.
Jeonghan bit his lips. This is getting dangerous.
“You know,” he said after a moment, mostly because silence was making him too aware of himself, “you don't have to make it perfect.”
“I know.”
“I mean it. If it opens and closes without me having to throw my shoulder into it, that's already an improvement.”
Seungcheol laughed softly. “I'll keep the standard reasonable.”
“Thank you.”
A few minutes later, Seungcheol attached the door properly and tightened a few more screws.
Jeonghan had no idea what he had actually done. There had been screws, a screwdriver, a few quiet muttered words from Seungcheol when something didn’t line up properly, and several minutes of him leaning close to the door while Jeonghan stood there pretending he understood any of it.
He had mostly been watching Seungcheol’s hands…and his arms…and the way his hair fell forward whenever he looked down. This was becoming embarrassing.
Seungcheol finally tested the door carefully. He opened it, closed it, then opened it again. It moved smoothly this time.
Jeonghan pushed himself away from the wall. “Wait. That's it?”
“Looks like it.”
He stepped closer to inspect it, and Seungcheol moved aside to let him through. Their shoulders brushed as Jeonghan passed. Neither mentioned it.
Jeonghan opened and closed the door once himself, then looked back at him with genuine surprise.
“Oh. It works !”
“You sound surprised.”
“I am surprised. I genuinely thought you were going to make it worse.”
“That’s a lot of faith you have in me.”
“I had faith. It was just... cautious faith.”
Seungcheol chuckled and Jeonghan turned toward him properly, and suddenly they were standing almost face to face in the doorway.
It was close enough that Jeonghan could see the tiny crease near Seungcheol’s eyes when he smiled, close enough that he could smell his cologne again.
Their eyes met, and for a few seconds, neither seemed particularly interested in looking away. Jeonghan’s heart started beating harder.
“Thank you” he said softly.
Seungcheol smiled wider. “You’re welcome.”
Jeonghan looked down, suddenly shy, and stepped back just enough to breathe normally again.
Seungcheol glanced away too, running a hand through his hair as though he needed the movement to break whatever those last few seconds were.
“You know…” Jeonghan mumbled. “Um…in the reunion…uh…when I came to speak to you…you looked at me very flatly and then looked back at your phone. I remember thinking, wow, okay, he really doesn’t want me here. You looked so serious that I thought I’d somehow already ruined your night.”
Seungcheol felt the memory come back so clearly/
He had been terrified.
That was the embarrassing truth of it.
He had seen Jeonghan across the room that night and spent far too long pretending he hadn’t noticed him.
Then Jeonghan had actually walked over, and suddenly Seungcheol had forgotten every normal human sentence he knew.
He had been texting Minghao because he had needed someone to tell him what to do, and by the time Jeonghan reached him, he had been staring at his phone while internally panicking about the fact that the person he had spent years quietly loving was standing right in front of him.
So yes, he had looked cold.
“Jeonghan I was not—”
Jeonghan shook his head quickly, smiling before Seungcheol could explain.
“You don’t have to say something nice about it. It’s okay. Honestly, I think you were actually pretty polite. I was basically a stranger who came over and interrupted you, and you still asked if you could help me instead of telling me to go away. So I guess it worked out pretty well.” He laughed quietly, rubbing his face as he looked down. “It’s just funny when I think about it now. Back then I was standing there thinking, ‘Wow, this guy definitely does not want me here,’ and now you’re in my apartment actually helping me by fixing my bedroom door.”
Jeonghan looked at him with a really fond look.
“What I’m trying to say is…I’m really glad I didn’t walk away that night. I almost did. I thought I was embarrassing myself, and honestly, I really was, but I’m glad I still tried to talk to you. I’m glad I kept trying to get to know you instead of deciding you hated me and giving up. Because now…I know you. At least a little…and I really like that….I don’t know if you’re having as good a time as I am….but I’ve had a really good time with you, Seungcheol. Like, genuinely. Even when everything goes wrong. Maybe especially then. I like spending time with you. I like talking to you.”
Seungcheol smiled. “I like talking to you too, Jeonghan. I’ve been having a great time ever since we started hanging out….you’re a really great friend”
Jeonghan gently nudged him. “Well, if you had ignored me at the reunion, you wouldn’t have gotten this amazing friend.”
Seungcheol laughed, shaking his head.
Then he hesitated but asked. “What would you have done if you’d tried to talk to me and I’d just smiled and walked away?”
Because that was what Jeonghan had done to him.
Graduation day.
Seungcheol had spent the entire day looking for a chance to speak to him. He had rehearsed what he might say, imagined walking over after the ceremony, imagined finally introducing himself properly after years of knowing Jeonghan from a distance.
He managed to say congratulations but Jeonghan had just smiled and walked away…the worst part is that Jeonghan didn’t even remember any of that now.
Seungcheol had been that irrelevant to Jeonghan.
Seungcheol had told himself it didn’t matter.
He was a teenager. What did he know about anything?
Still, he had wondered about it for years.
“I probably would’ve assumed you didn’t want to talk to me,” Jeonghan said eventually. “I would’ve gone home and replayed it in my head for ages, though. I’d probably convince myself I’d said something weird or looked weird or maybe you just thought I was annoying. Then I’d eventually pretend I didn’t care.”
Seungcheol smiled faintly. “If I’d ignored you that night at the reunion, do you think you would’ve tried again? Maybe if we ran into each other at another reunion a few years later. Would you have come up to me and said, ‘You know, I tried talking to you last time and you just walked away’? Or would you have pretended it never happened and tried talking to me again anyway?”
Jeonghan blinked at him, clearly caught off guard by the question. His expression became thoughtful in that way Seungcheol had started noticing whenever Jeonghan was trying to give a real answer instead of immediately making a joke.
“I think I’d pretend it never happened….or I don’t know…maybe I’d tell the truth at the very beginning and just clear the air. That’s better. I think I’d risk being embarrassed again.”
Seungcheol nodded and looked away.
“What would you have done?” Jeonghan asked. “Oh shit wait ! is this your way of saying you knew me before the reunion !? tried to talk to me !?”
Seungcheol’s eyes snapped to him fast.
He opened his mouth and for one stupid second, he had actually been ready to say it.
Yes, I knew you. Yes, I tried to talk to you. Yes, I remembered you long before you remembered me.
He could have said it so easily, and maybe Jeonghan would have laughed, maybe he would have been surprised, maybe he would have asked why Seungcheol had never said anything before.
Instead, fear had gotten there first.
“I think you’re reading too much into it. I was just curious what you would’ve done.” Seungchel said.
Jeonghan kept staring at him.
Seungcheol stared back for a moment before looking away, suddenly finding the toolbox on the floor.
“Okay” Jeonghan said slowly. “I believe you.”
Seungcheol glanced at him.
Jeonghan was smiling. It wasn’t the suspicious smile from a moment ago. It was smaller than that, softer, like he really believed Seungcheol.
That made Seungcheol feel even guiltier.
He looked away before the guilt could show too clearly on his face and shifted his attention back to the door, pointing out the hinges and telling Jeonghan that he should keep an eye on it for the next few days just to make sure it stayed aligned.
It was easier to talk about screws and hinges than whatever had just been sitting between them.
Seungcheol reminded him about his shoulder…to get it checked the next day if it was still hurting.
Jeonghan listened this time without arguing too much, although he still made a face when Seungcheol told him not to keep pretending that being able to move his arm meant everything was fine.
The conversation eventually drifted somewhere safer. Work, the restaurant, Jeonghan’s fancy toolbox.
Seungcheol kept thinking about the question he had almost answered.
How was he ever supposed to explain it?
How was he supposed to tell Jeonghan that the truth wasn’t as simple as, I knew you in high school, or, I tried to talk to you once and you walked away? Those things were technically true, but they were barely the beginning
They didn’t explain the years in between. They didn’t explain how Seungcheol had quietly fallen for someone he barely knew, how he had watched Jeonghan from a distance and slowly convinced himself that wanting anything more was pointless.
It didn’t explain how he had loved him without expecting anything back, without even allowing himself to imagine that one day Jeonghan might sit beside him on his couch, eat brownies he had made, laugh at his stupid stories, or look at him like he actually wanted him there.
And then Seungcheol thought he had moved on but Jeonghan had walked into his life again, and Seungcheol had lost every bit of control he thought he had.
He had spent years making peace with loving Jeonghan from far away.
Now he wanted the opposite.
He wanted to know him properly. He wanted more evenings like this, more ordinary conversations, more reasons to see him, more chances to make him smile. Somewhere along the way, the distance he had once been so comfortable with had become unbearable.
The problem was that Jeonghan didn’t know any of it.
And Seungcheol knew that the longer he kept the truth from him, the harder it was going to be to explain without making it sound like something it wasn’t.
Because how did you tell someone, I loved you for years when you didn’t even know my name mattered to you?
How did you tell them, I gave up on ever having you loving me back, and then you came back into my life and suddenly I wanted everything I had spent years convincing myself I didn’t need?
Seungcheol looked at Jeonghan as he laughed about something completely unrelated, completely unaware of the mess sitting quietly inside Seungcheol.
Maybe one day Seungcheol would finally tell him everything, stop holding it back and let every ugly, complicated piece of it spill out.
Maybe Jeonghan would understand. Maybe he would laugh softly, take his hand, and stay.
But there was another possibility Seungcheol couldn’t ignore, that Jeonghan would look at him differently after hearing how long he had been loved from afar, wonder if it had all just been another version of the obsession everyone had with him in high school, and suddenly see everything between them as something strange.
He was terrified that the truth could stain every good thing they had built and make Jeonghan walk away.
Seungcheol couldn’t risk that.
Not when he had finally found Jeonghan again.
Not when losing him now would hurt so much more than losing him had ever hurt before.