Work Text:
Just A Corporate Drone @TimWithBits35
Yo! Where my hockey fans at? Dragged to a stuffy lunch by my corporate overlords and halfway through I spot the Shane Hollander sitting down to eat right next to me. Seemed engrossed in convo and didn’t want to bother, but snapped a pic.
[image attached, tap to download]
↳Action Adam @Adwill4568
Epic!
↳Actually a Barbie @BarbJS27
Tim, you have all the luck! He’s on my list!
↳Hockey Hibernation @MetropolitianBoy12
Dude, what is happening here? Is Shane Hollander so above it all that he has someone to cut his food? Lmao
↳Just A Corporate Drone @TimWithBits35
Ha! I think that’s his mom.
↳Hockey Hibernation @MetropolitianBoy12
That’s even funnier
↳Just A Corporate Drone @TimWithBits35
She ordered for him too lol
↳Action Adam @Adwill4568
Hollander’s mom orders for him and cuts his food? Like, what in the actual
↳Montreal Candice @CandyCaneGirl
What is he, 12?
↳↳Lala Rundown @tralalalala
Try 3. My toddler cuts her own food
↳Actually a Barbie @BarbJS27
This is not as sexy as that CK ad he did. Maybe I need to swap him out and put someone else on my list…
↳Khalid MQ @imnoDJbabe
Is this what happens when you get this wealthy? You expect other people to do things like this for you?
↳Miller Buddy @brosb4hosman
You can’t find real men anywhere these days. Women whine about “toxic masculinity” but this is what’s toxic. Toxic femininity. Toxic mothers ruining their sons like this
↳Lala Rundown @tralalalala
This is one of the most controlling helicopter parenting things I’ve ever seen in the wild.
↳Just A Corporate Drone @TimWithBits35
Shit, guys. I just thought it was cool I saw Shane Hollander. I didn’t mean for this to become a thing.
[1.6k responses, tap to view]
Man in the Crease @ManintheCreasePod
Check out our latest. Tampa’s newest rookies, the controversial trade LA already made for defense, and does Shane Hollander really have his mom cut the crusts off his sandwiches?
Right Wing not Politics @alexpg1990
I played with Hollander in juniors when we were both in high school. Ordering his lunch is nowhere close to the weirdest thing I’ve seen his mom do for him.
↳Antoine on Ice @ALTremblay764
Spill! This sounds juicy!
↳↳Right Wing not Politics @alexpg1990
It’s not that juicy. I’m just saying Hollander was always so locked in he’d forget basic stuff. We used to joke that if his mom didn’t pick him up from the gym, he’d just live there and not go to class or eat dinner or anything.
↳Gregor the Magificico @HireGregorsMagicShow
If we’re offering other stories, I once saw Yuna Hollander essentially getting her son dressed before a MLH event.
↳↳Topher @Chrisjb98349
Holy incest, batman.
↳↳Gregor the Magificico @HireGregorsMagicShow
He wasn’t naked. It was in Vegas where I work, just out in the hallway before some event. She was tying his tie and making him change his jacket.
↳↳Unionize Zamboni Drivers @19904evah
Last year, someone was posting that everyone should stop infantilizing Hollander, but it sounds like maybe that was just his mom so she could corner the market on doing it herself.
↳Bastien S @imgonnabounce
I used to work at the Metros stadium in security. Let’s just say Yuna Hollander was well known to us.
↳↳Nightwing Duck @DCjerome55
That needs elaboration.
↳↳Topher @Chrisjb98349
Did she break into the locker rooms? I’m back to incest.
↳↳Bastien S @imgonnabounce
Coaching offices. Especially his rookie season. Managers do sometimes visit administration, especially for PR and stuff. Just weird that it was his mom. There are usually rules for family. They’re VIP’s on site, but only allowed in certain areas.
↳↳Sloth Boy @HNNsushi
I also used to work at the Metros stadium, as an office grunt in HR. I second all of this. Everyone knew who Yuna Hollander was. I don’t think I can name a single other player’s parent.
MHL News Now @MHLNews4U
Metro’s Shane Hollander is Canada’s golden boy, but what role did his mother play in getting him there?
Old School Baller @Wronblatzski12
Managers vs. momagers in pro sports, or what’s maybe up with Shane Hollander’s mom controlling his lunch, a lengthy thread. Buckle in. I’m going to break it down. 1/
↳Followers will know that I’ve worked in sports management for the last 30 years. My specialty is the NBA, but hockey is similar. I was a Big Ten player myself. I know the pro athletic world. 2/
↳When you look at a top talent like Tom Brady, LeBron James, or Shane Hollander, it’s hard not to think that their rise was inevitable because their talent is so great. 3/
↳But that success isn’t inevitable. A million things can interrupt a great player. And conversely, a million things can help a good player become a great one. Parents, especially moms, are often one of the big factors in my experience. 4/
↳Most athletes owe a lot to their parents. Families sacrifice money and time. I don’t know many athletes whose moms didn’t spend countless hours driving, cooking, advocating, and organizing. As a dad, I can say: this goes beyond typical parenting. 5/
↳When athletes get a contract or start getting talked about for a contract, even in the minor leagues, they get an agent. While they can go without one, that’s rare for pros. 6/
↳Agents are lawyers. It’s a highly regulated industry. They take a cut of the contract and help negotiate for the best deal, as well as deal with special clauses and things like trades. 7/
↳Unlike having an agent, not all athletes have a manager. Managers deal with brand deals, endorsements, public relations, financials, and all kinds of logistics. We’re jacks of all trades. 8/
↳An example. Early in my career, I drove three states away to pay the ransom on a championship ring a client lost in a bar bet. Basically, this job is mostly boring money and logistics, but it can get wild. 9/
↳If you’re a second stringer or a fourth liner, you may not need a professional manager. Your options for deals are limited. You don’t need much security and no one beyond hardcore fans are interested in PR for you. 10/
↳So who will handle it? Well, if you’re a teenager or fresh out of NCAA (like most new pros), then chances are it will be a family member and there’s a good shot it will be your mom. This is where we get “momager.” It’s an extension of what she’s been doing all along. 11/
↳However, more known players, especially a top draft pick, will have more complex needs. There are more brand deals, more contracts, and more logistics. This is when managers come into play. 12/
↳Managers are the wild west. Unlike agents, anyone can get into the game. Many were college athletes who studied business, which is the path I took. But others start in entertainment representation or as lawyers or accountants. 13/
↳We also take a cut, but mostly of the brands and endorsements we bring in. We may also charge as we connect clients with services like accountants, security, personal assistants, and more. I started with a big firm but now I work for myself at a boutique firm. 14/
↳Typically, the sort of athletes who are household names have managers early on. There’s a back and forth relationship. Talent and name recognition aren’t always the same thing. Managers can get a less important player into the public eye. A better player with bad management may not be in the public eye as much. 15/
↳Shane Hollander never took on professional management. Rare among athletes who are ranked this highly in their sport. Unheard of for an athlete with multiple international level brand deals in no less than a dozen ad campaigns in the last five years. 16/
↳This is something we’ve been talking about in the industry for years but isn’t well known among fans. Yuna Hollander has cultivated the sort of industry relationships that it usually takes decades to grow. She’s the envy of momagers everywhere. 17/
↳So what makes Yuna Hollander so successful? Hard to say. Her parents were Canadian immigrants from Japan. She attended McGill where she met and later married David Hollander. She majored in communications and entered the banking industry. 18/
↳She has the background to have become a manager herself. She was a sports fan in the com and biz world, married to a college athlete. That’s not necessarily enough, but I’ve known successful managers who got started with less. 19/
↳When Shane Hollander played in the Junior World Cup, she negotiated his first major brand deals, with hockey equipment company CCM and Canadian sporting goods chain Sports Experts. She also got him in Sports Illustrated and on the front page of Yahoo Sports. 20/
↳That’s an unusual level of success. Not hockey success, brand success. At that point, Shane Hollander was still a minor. He signed his first MLH contract before he turned 18 so Yuna Hollander had the ability to decide to keep managing him. 21/
↳Most families would be enticed by the opportunities professional management offers. But Yuna Hollander instead started creating her own network. She left her job and manages her son full time. She’s essentially a manager with one high profile client. 22/
↳Initially, it looks like she didn’t take a salary at all. However, public filings indicate that she filed as a business owner in 2011, during Shane Hollander’s second MLH season. She pays at least two contractors and uses outside PR. 23/
↳The key thing for most families of budding athletes to understand here is not do as Yuna did, but DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME. 24/
↳It’s impossible to stress how unusual this is. Athletes are young and dumb. They are prone to both sweet decisions (every new pro wants to buy his mom a car) and idiotic ones (the off season is ripe for publicists dealing with scandals as these kids deal with new freedom and cash). 25/
↳Inexperience leads to getting taken advantage of in a variety of ways. Managers protect athletes in business deals, but also in relationships and general finances. Without it, most athletes lose money, either literally through poor decisions or figuratively through lost potential deals. 26/
↳What Yuna Hollander has achieved is impressive. Not only does Shane Hollander have great brand deals, he also continues to have a squeaky clean image. His media training is top notch. 27/
↳So what does this say about the relationship so buzzed about in the photo of Shane and Yuna Hollander sharing lunch out in Montreal? 28/
↳You know how they say you never really know what goes on in a marriage? Same is true here. But I can throw out some general information so you can draw your own conclusions. 29/
↳The number one reason for families not to DIY management is inexperience and money. But the number two reason is to protect the relationship. Parents who manage are more likely to blur boundaries. 30/
↳That blurring can be financial. Think about the Hollywood stories you’ve heard about child stars who get their money stolen. The same can happen to young athletes. For example, the MLH’s Jackson Smithfield last year. 31/
↳It can also be emotional. New pro athletes are (usually) adults but they’re very young and need a lot of support off the court (or ice in this case). That support can easily become controlling. 32/
↳Especially when the “manager” is a parent used to having control and especially when the family’s income relies on the athlete or when the parent holds the purse strings for the athlete. 33/
↳Again, I can’t say if any of these pitfalls apply to the Hollanders. But I can say that momagers get a bad rap. And it’s mostly for good reasons. /end thread.
Kaitlyn: Hey, Yuna and Shane. I just wanted to give you a heads up that there’s some chatter on socials about a lunch photo snapped of both of you last week. I wanted to assure you that I’m on top of it. Yuna, we can discuss when we check in on Tuesday.
Shane: What photo?
Yuna: Shane, you don’t need to worry about this. Just focus on the Detroit game.
Yuna: Send me all the links. In the future, do not bother Shane with these. Always run it by me first.
Kaitlyn: I genuinely don’t think any of it is a big deal, but it did hit Man in the Crease, so Shane probably will heard about it anyway.
[link attached, tap to download]
Elliot Roy @MetrosFTW
I can’t stop thinking about the fact that my favorite hockey player is a mama’s boy. Is this why he’s so polite on the ice?
↳Babe Fett @starwarsuniversityfan
Do you think his mom sends him to time out if he starts shit on the ice?
↳Don F. Viscar @DontheEnforcer
I’ve been saying for years that the Metros need to be more aggressive. Hollander lets other teams walk all over us.
↳↳Leo Tweets @LeoLionizeMe
WTF are you talking about. We have two cups because of Hollander?!?
↳↳Sloth Boy @HNNsushi
Borderline insane take here.
The Archer @SamQArchery
Do we know if Yuna Hollander decided to manage her own son because of racial issues with management? Asian pro athletes don’t always get taken seriously.
↳Tammy @TammyNguyen
Asians dominate in a lot of Olympic sports.
↳The Archer @SamQArchery
Okay, sure. And baseball has a growing group of strong Japanese players. And Jeremy Lin at the Knicks now. But there’s still a lot of stereotypes. Remember how people talked about Yao Ming like he was a freak of nature and not a real athlete?
↳Admirals vs Mets @NYCallsportsfan
I assumed this could be part of it. There are top Asian athletes but they still have to fight to be taken seriously beyond just being some sort of exception. And hockey is extra white.
Lisabet Lisabet @grrlinthecitys
As someone with a hyper-controlling toxic narcissist for a mom, I’m finding all this Yuna Hollander stuff really triggering.
↳Celeste Young @cyanotypical
Ikr! I was in the chat at Surviving Narcissism and she came up. It’s like no one is talking about how toxic this is. NPD is not funny!
↳Just Another Andrew @drewwilders3
This is literally what my NPD mom did last time I went to breakfast with her. She ordered my meal before I even got there, then took my bacon because “I wouldn’t want it” and threw a fit when I ordered something else. Unhinged.
↳Go Cyclones! @kissmygrits
People talk nonstop about how “nice” Hollander is, but you can see it’s fear. That’s how I felt before I broke free of my narcissist mom. You’re always scared to even do anything. If you screw up, they lose it.
Kaitlyn: Hi, Yuna. We’re getting some interview requests for you. I’m sending them via email. I’d like to talk strategy.
Kaitlyn: Yuna, I know this blew up a little bit, but I talked to Farah and have some ideas. I don’t think you should do any interviews, but I do think we should have a plan and possibly a very basic statement. If you’ll call me back, we can chat about it.
Kaitlyn: I’m just checking that you’re okay. When a story spirals like this, you know as well as I do that it’s better to do something about it. Farah emailed her thoughts.
Kaitlyn: Hi, Shane. I don’t mean to bother you, but both Farah and I are having trouble reaching your mom.
Kaitlyn: I’m starting to get a little worried.
Shane: I think my dad took away her phone.
Kaitlyn: Do you mind if I ask if she has a plan for all the media attention right now? I assume you’ve seen it?
Shane: Yes.
Kaitlyn: I’m just trying to do my job. I’m PR for you and your brand and that includes your mom right now. If she’s upset, I totally get it! I’m not trying to pile on. I’m trying to make it better.
Kaitlyn: I can also talk to you instead if Yuna’s not available. Maybe before tomorrow’s game?
Shane: I’ll have her call you.
Buzzfeed Sports @BuzzfeedSports
13 Times We Spotted Ultimate Momager Yuna Hollander in the Background Pulling the Strings: A Photo Montage
Walt Wojcik @WWMetros73
This Yuna Hollander “mom manager” stuff is demeaning to the work Shane Hollander puts into the game. Most of the people you see commenting know nothing about hockey as a game or a business.
↳Metroroid @philippepb79
Can people not just let the man play hockey? He’s pretty good at it.
Sharlize May @thatvideoessaygirl
Thinking about doing a Jamie Spears, Joan Crawford, Yuna Hollander video about what happens when toxic parents enter the public eye, especially when money and fame are involved. What do my followers think?
Vincent K Wang @wasiansruletheworld
With all this Yuna Hollander talk, I can’t believe I haven’t seen any racist takes on her mixed race marriage.
↳Beebee @BTSnationarmy
I wish I hadn’t.
[link preview] “...and the genetic mixing of his mom’s intelligence with his dad’s…”
↳Vincent K Wang @wasiansruletheworld
Damnit.
Katie Kat @DisneyMamonExtraordinary
As a “hockey mom” myself, I don’t think people get how much work it takes just to have a kid in AA. My entire life is structured around hockey.
↳The Third Sarah @SaDudley
But who chose that?
↳Katie Kat @DisneyMamonExtraordinary
Of course I chose it. I’m just saying that it’s a lot of work. People are acting like Yuna Hollander is some mad with power b**** and not a mom who’s sacrificing for her kid.
↳Land Lubbers @PhilSLubber12
Her “kid” is like 25.
↳The Third Sarah @SaDudley
So you admit that you chose this, not your son. You’re basically pushing him into this sport. And for your own glory.
↳Katie Kat @DisneyMamonExtraordinary
You’re making a lot of assumptions, about both me and Yuna Hollander. My hockey player happens to be a daughter, for one.
Yahoo! Sports @yahoosports
Shane Hollander’s mom and manager Yuna Hollander spotted at Metros game with husband, refuses to answer questions about her management. Video of Hollander’s two assists included in the story.
Parenting with Love and Kindness @DrJeromeRichardson
As a hockey fan (Go Admirals!), I’ve been following the Yuna Hollander discussion online. Shane Hollander is a phenom on the ice. We don’t know the truth of that relationship, but I want to say a few things about the discussion. 1/
↳Healthy boundaries are important for all relationships, but they are often hardest to discern in parenting. 2/
↳When you hold your newborn, there’s very little boundaries. Babies are utterly dependent on you. You have to bend heaven and earth to give them what they need. 3/
↳But at the same time, you have to take care of yourself. You need food and rest too. Even as the parent of a newborn, you have to put your oxygen mask on first before you care for them or you won’t be able to fulfill those needs. 4/
↳As our children grow, we establish evolving boundaries with their needs and our own. It continues to be the case that we have to don our proverbial oxygen masks first in order to be our best selves as parents. 5/
↳We have to balance our responsibility to ourselves and our responsibility as parents. Both are important to treat seriously. 6/
↳Appropriate boundaries with your elementary schooler are different than with your teen readying to leave for college. 7/
↳Many of the pressure points I address with clients in my practice come as these boundaries evolve. Children naturally look for greater independence and parents rightfully struggle to see when it’s time to stop providing support. 8/
↳A lot is made about helicopter parents and lawnmower parents. In my experience, most parents are just trying to do the best for their kids. 9/
↳But an issue I see again and again are parents who do the work for their kids instead of helping kids do the work for themselves. If you’re a busy parent trying to get your 5 year old out of the house, it’s quicker to tie their shoes than teach them to tie. 10/
↳Obviously, that’s fine for a busy morning before kindergarten. But what about before 3rd grade? What about 10th? If you don’t take the time, eventually it is inappropriate to tie your kid’s shoes. 11/
↳It’s easy to see this looking in from the outside, but a lot harder when you’re in the thick of it as a parent. And most things aren’t as obvious as learning to tie your shoes. They can be especially not obvious with a highly accomplished young adult child. 12/
↳Again, I don’t know what is the reality of the Hollanders’ relationship. But the discussion around parenting it has raised brings these thoughts. 13/
↳Click the link for my upcoming parenting seminars and my video “Parenting in the Balance,” now available to purchase through streaming. end/
Jenny Witz @proudmombloggress
I love a good discourse as much as the next person, but a lot of the “Shane Hollander is too old to cut the crusts off his sandwiches” discussion feels really ableist. My youngest will probably always need that sort of care.
↳
People are so oversensitive. How could we possibly be ableist?!? Shane Hollander is not disabled.
↳Jenny Witz @proudmombloggress
My point is that you don’t know. Disabilities are often invisible. Disabled people can be highly successful in one avenue of life and have challenges in other areas. Hearing people criticize the help they need is harmful.
↳BB Handler @DuncanCrouching
This is why people think the internet is too politically correct. Now we can’t even laugh at a grown man whose mommy cuts up his food? That’s objectively mockable.
↳Jenny Witz @proudmombloggress
But when you mock people who need an accommodation, you’re also mocking my young adult son who hears this sort of thing and is hurt by it.
↳BB Handler @DuncanCrouching
STFU. I’m not making fun of your dumb kid.
↳26.2 in 4 hours @runningjacob
Ngl I always lowkey thought Hollander might be autistic. Have you seen his interviews? Dude is like a hockey robot.
↳↳Jenny Witz @proudmombloggress
You can’t just go around calling people autistic “robots.” That actually is ableist.
↳↳26.2 in 4 hours @runningjacob
People think “special interests” are like Legos and train schedules, but as an autistic person who hyperfixates on marathon running, Hollander has always seemed like a kindred spirit. I’m not “armchair diagnosing” I’m just identifying with him.
ESPN News @ESPN
The Comet’s Jackson Smithfield and the Metros’s Shane Hollander: What protections are in place for MLH stars from their family members. Our panel discuss.
↳Heather in the Heather @PWHLfan4lfe
Wtf. These situations are so different. Hollander’s mom is maybe a little overbearing. Smithfield’s dad borrowed millions against his kid’s stardom and ended up blowing it all.
↳Carl @comets4thecup
Smithfield wishes he had Hollander’s fortune.
↳↳Brando Bee @burneracct12347
Dude is broke. It’s really sad what happened to him.
↳↳Gideon @rockyinwisconson83
And his skills on the ice. Smithfield would be a third stringer if he was on the Metros.
The New York Times @NYTimes
In this Sunday’s style section: The newest generation of Tiger Moms helping their kids pioneer avenues into sports, entertainment, and fashion. Yuna Hollander is among good company.
↳Mai @maiwrites
If I have to see another Asian mom referred to as a “Tiger Mom” I’m going to lose it.
↳Zombie Josh @JoshuaPZhu
I can’t believe how many racist Asian tropes NYT managed to cram into this piece. Unreal.
↳Occasional BTS Army Drone @kikiSeattlegrl
This utterly ignores both the history of exclusion of Asian actors, musicians, and athletes and the forerunners of today’s stars. Shane Hollander is not the first Asian athlete ever, but you’d never know it reading this piece.
↳Devin Plays Hockey @DevininBuffalo
I still can’t believe they worked Yuna Hollander into this. Wtf even is this article. Why am I still paying for the NYT when they have a batshit take like this once a month?
↳Mitch Y @newaccount9876
This bs from NYT illustrates the Catch-22’s that Asian Americans face in public life. It’s impossible to be successful without being told you’re representing all Asians. Never mind that Asians in the Americas are diverse af.
The Sports Mom’s Guide! @Sports4MomsYT
Trying to figure out how to get your teen’s talents recognized? In our latest episode, Shauna and Karen talk about copying the Yuna Hollander model. Follow us for tips!
The Atlantic @TheAtlanticMagazine
Youth sports has become all about money. Where did we go wrong?
↳Get out the Vote @dem2001
Holy shit. Is this yet another Yuna Hollander thinkpiece?
↳Luc BG @Metrosletop
I’m paywalled out. How can this possibly be another Yuna Hollander thing?
↳↳Get out the Vote @dem2001
It’s the lede for the whole piece. You have to have the upper middle class privilege of the Hollanders and spend the kind of time Yuna Hollander spent to get a kid from youth success to pro.
↳↳Luc BG @Metrosletop
Are the Hollanders that wealthy? Sure, now. But I thought I read his parents were government workers in Canada?
↳↳Suburban Dad @nickleclaire
I don’t think they’re super wealthy, but I’ve got a kid in travel ball and the fees and time definitely add up. Every single family on my kid’s team is pretty affluent, even though we’re from a much more socioeconomically mixed area.
↳↳Girl in the Crease @emilynumber34
Dragging Yuna Hollander into yet another one of these things is a lot, but I agree with the article. Youth sports is a grift. A lot of talent is lost because families can’t afford it. It’s worth reading if you can find a link around the paywall.
Daniel Tiger’s Snarky Cousin @rogers09973RB
FFS, people. He probably texted his mom what to order for lunch because he was running late or smthg. And now we’ve all wasted a week on this. The internet is so broken.
Shane had been looking forward to the first Raiders game of the season, but now it’s the night before and his parents are at his condo and he’s feeling pretty overwhelmed.
Yuna comes back from the bedroom where she’s been holed up with her laptop all afternoon.
David leans forward and speaks very carefully. “So, honey. What did Kaitlyn say? Did you talk to Farah too?”
Shane isn’t supposed to be the one who tells his mom what to do about PR. She’s the one who tells him how to behave in front of the cameras or talking to reporters. She’s the one who taught him how to craft a careful social media post that would please everyone.
Yuna glances between the two of them. Shane looks down at the quinoa and sweet potato side he’s been assembling from the pre-packaged foods in his fridge. There’s chicken breast already in the oven.
“Nothing I didn’t already know,” she says briskly. Then she stands there looking as awkward as Shane feels much of the time, only it’s very out of place on his mom, who always knows how to rule a room.
“Is it stuffy in here?” she says. “It’s stuffy to me. I think I sat for too long. I’m just going to…” She waves her hand and heads for the entryway.
The sun is already set, so it’s probably close to freezing outside. Shane glances at what’s supposed to be dinner.
“Just give her a minute,” David says when they hear the door shut. “It’s been a rough few days.”
Shane adds the lemon and chopped spinach to the quinoa. When the timer dings, he turns off the oven. “Should we wait?” he asks his father.
“She’ll be back,” David says.
Shane glances toward the lights of Montreal outside the glass windows of his condo. “I’ll just…” He heads to the entry and grabs his coat.
She’s easy enough to find, standing in the little courtyard next to the circular drive that marks the entrance to the condo building. She leans against the black security fencing, looking above the sidewalk to the adjacent tall buildings. Her hands are in her heavy wool coat and the collar is pulled up.
“Is this enough fresh air or do you need more?”
“You didn’t need to come out. It’s perfectly safe. I’m fine.”
Shane glances at the city street. It’s a quiet block. He hadn’t doubted her safety. But when he looks at her, he realizes she does seem smaller than he thinks of her in his mind.
“Of course you’re fine,” he says. “You know, people who don’t always see themselves in sports, like, as an industry, are paying attention to you right now.”
For a moment, she just stares at him before she sputters something in between laughter and indignation. “Are you telling me to suck it up because you’ve been through worse?”
“No. Not exactly.”
He supposes he could be resentful. Having his photo snapped at a random lunch is nothing. He’s gotten so used to it. There is a certain irony in the fact that she’s the one who spent years preparing him for the possibility that he would need to be ready to be watched in public without ever preparing for it herself.
But that’s not what Shane feels. He’s inoculated against it. But at the same time, it’s horrible. He hates it. He would never wish it on his mother.
Yuna raises her hands to her face and blows warmth onto them.
“It feels like a dose of my own medicine.”
“But why? Do you feel guilty?”
“Mostly I feel like no matter what I do, I can’t win.”
“You know what they’re saying is mostly nonsense. You can’t look at it. That’s why Dad took your phone when you wouldn’t put it down. You’re the one who taught me not to look.”
“Yes, because I was looking for you, making sure you were okay.”
“So let Farah and Kaitlyn do that for you?” Shane shoves his own hands into his pockets. He wonders if they’re going to have to stay outside long. It’s not the biting cold of mid-winter yet, but it is chilly. The weather said they might get an early snow after the game.
“I’m not used to following orders.” Yuna’s features tighten in the security lights from the building. Someone comes out of the big glass doors walking a tiny dog.
“What’s the plan?”
“Kaitlyn wants me to start using my own social media to post some pictures of you and me and your father over time. We’re going to do a ‘Throwback Thursday’ thing for a few weeks. Farah sent a statement for you to work in next time you talk to media. There’s a little more to it than that, but that’s all you need to worry about it.”
“Sounds like not a big deal,” Shane says. He waits for her to agree so they can go inside.
“You… want to do what you’re doing, right?” Yuna asks.
“What?”
“Hockey. Hockey makes you happy, right?”
Shane freezes. He can see his breath mist out from him. It’s such a change of subject that his brain takes a moment to change direction.
“Oh god. Shane, sweetheart. I don’t want to think that you have to do anything you don’t want to do. I know sometimes I may have pushed, but only because you seemed to love it so much and I wanted you to have the best shot at your dreams, not because I wanted you to do it for me. I don’t want to be controlling. You’re an adult and I’ve tried to step back and give you your space. But now… you just don’t seem happy.”
“Mom, that’s not… I do love hockey. You didn’t force me into anything. I wanted this. I am never more alive than when I’m on the ice.”
“But are you happy? Your father and I, we worry. You were so young when you started playing. So young to be in the public eye. It’s so much pressure. Even if you chose it, maybe you didn’t entirely know what you were choosing. I was so focused on getting you there and protecting your interests that I never forced you to pause and understand the life you were planning to lead. I should have helped you understand that…”
“How?” Shane interrupts. “It’s not like you had a crystal ball.” Maybe she is only just now realizing what it’s like, how many people have opinions and think they understand you. Shane has only glanced at the online discussion about his mom ordering his lunch and cutting the skin off his salmon. He never would have eaten it. She loved the crispy skin. He’s mostly learned about the photo through annoying locker room chirps and reporters’ questions that he refused to respond to after the last game.
“Maybe not. I understand why you need to put up walls, Shane. I get it more than ever right now. But it seems like your walls are so high that even your dad and I can’t be let in. I don’t want to meddle. I’ve been trying so hard not to meddle. But now everyone thinks I’m a controlling, meddling, overbearing, tiger mom bitch anyway. I can’t win.”
“No. Of course you can’t.” Shane pauses for effect. “I’m the one who wins. Stanley Cups. Remember?”
Yuna harrumphs and makes a sort of half hearted attempt to hit him playfully, though he can tell she’s still upset.
“Actually, you’re my manager, so I guess that’s your win too.”
Yuna shakes her head. “No, all yours, honey.”
“I really need to go eat those chicken breasts,” Shane points out.
They eat at the counter watching Jeopardy on the big screen TV in the adjacent living area. His parents help use up the feta cheese he’s been mostly avoiding as part of his diet and his dad adds what Shane is sure is too much salt to everything on his plate.
Before he heads to his room for an early bedtime, his mom grabs him and hugs him, something she doesn’t do that often these days.
“Don’t think I didn’t notice that you didn’t answer my question,” she says.
Shane nods. “Thank you for not meddling.”
“Thank you for noticing that I’m not meddling.”
He’s left his phone tucked away, mostly in solidarity with his mom, who he knows is itching to check social media. When he slides in bed, he realizes he missed messages from Rozanov.
Lily: I have something you want tomorrow
Lily: It will be a good consolation prize
Lily: Will my pretty Jane let me in after the game or leave me in the scary murder alley?
Lily: If you do, I give you what you want )))
Jane: You don’t have anything I want.
Rozanov responds almost immediately, which sends fluttering feelings through Shane’s body.
Lily: That is not true
Jane: It is.
Lily: Gasp. Jane is a lying liar. I can’t believe it
Jane: Not a lie. You’re the one who will need a consolation prize tomorrow.
Lily: And will you provide me with one? Maybe your mouth? I’ll be very sad and need lots of consoling
Jane: So you admit it. You’re going to lose
Lily: I admit nothing. Just want to hear what prizes you offer
Jane: You’ll have to find out.
Jane: After you lose.
Lily: Oh! Was that a joke?
Jane: No
Lily: You still haven’t told me if you will open the door or leave me to die in the scary murder alley
Jane: Yeah. Sure. Don’t text me before the game.
Lily: I am not a lying liar, so no promises ;)
Shane can’t stop the smile that breaks over his face as he plugs his phone in, slides the Do Not Disturb on, and clicks to his white noise app since his parents are in the condo.
He’s usually excellent at falling asleep, especially before a game when he can tell his body that he’ll need it. But for several minutes, he finds his mind imagining Rozanov walking past as he talked to his mom in the dark courtyard earlier.
Mom, this is Rozanov. Rozanov, this is my mom, Yuna Hollander. We’re having a private conversation. Go away.
Rozanov, what are you doing here? No, Mom, I don’t hate him.
Oh, Mom. This is Ilya Rozanov. No, I don’t know why he’s here.
Shane isn’t usually prone to imagining scenarios like that. But when it comes to Rozanov, sometimes his brain doesn’t behave like it normally should. Even just thinking about his mom seeing him next to Rozanov makes him feel a little thrill of happiness.
He falls asleep thinking about how he’ll face Rozanov on the ice tomorrow night and his mom will be sitting just a few rows back in her normal seats. And she’ll see them together.
Apparently there’s yet another something about his mom on Twitter or in some article, because the moment he walks into the locker room, Comeau chirps, “There he is! Ooh ooh! Our favorite wittle boy!”
Shane drops his bag on the bench and just stares at Comeau. Seriously?
But Drapeau and Miity both chuckle.
“Mommy pack your bag?” Drapeau asks.
“Shut the fuck up,” Hayden says, shaking his head at Shane.
Suddenly Theriault pokes his head into the room. “Cut it out, chuckleheads,” he says gruffly. “Hollander, pre-game media in 10.”
“Yes, coach,” Shane says, opening his locker and stripping out of his suit quickly so he can put on his underlayers.
“You know they’re just fucking around,” Hayden leans in and says.
“Yeah, Hayden,” Shane rolls his eyes. “I know.”
“Honestly, we’re all jealous. Your mom is better than any of our managers.”
Shane agrees with this, which is why he wouldn’t ever change and why, his second year, he sat his mom down and forced her to take a reasonable salary and cut of his endorsement deals. It’s allowing his dad to retire early and his parents to travel more. When he started, he didn’t know any better, but it quickly became beyond obvious that most of his teammates didn’t get much from their managers and Shane was incredibly lucky. He just hums noncommittally to Hayden.
“Dude, no need to rub it in,” Hayden laughs.
“If you’re unhappy with your management, you know you can change.”
“You mean Shane Hollander hasn’t taken all the advertising deals? You’ve left some for us little people?”
“Shut up.” Shane says, tossing the nearest towel at his face as Hayden laughs.
He’d like to forget about the whole conversation about his mom, but he isn’t allowed to. When he heads over to talk to the reporters before the game, it’s literally the first thing they ask about. At least this time, there’s a plan.
“I guess you guys aren’t letting this go,” Shane says, as if this is an off the cuff comment instead of a carefully planned one. “I haven’t seen the photo that sparked all this talk about my mom, but I think it’s when she wanted to try a bite of my lunch and I let her. Some of my friends told me people had a lot to say about it, which is pretty funny. But maybe it shouldn’t be that surprising. My mom is pretty phenomenal. I guess the internet has realized it.”
“Shane, do you have comments about the unusual role your mother plays as your manager?” another reporter cuts in, clearly thrilled to finally have something real to say about this.
“Not really. I wouldn’t call her unusual. Other than the fact that she’s my mom, she’s just a normal manager. We have time set aside to talk business, but otherwise, she’s just here to root for me like any mom would. I think she’s doing an excellent job. I’m very happy with how many opportunities I’ve had in hockey and out in the world to partner with incredible brands and do some small good sometimes.”
“Shane…” couple of reporters try to interject more questions, but Shane refuses to say more, so they eventually ask about the game and his rivalry with Rozanov and how the new season is shaping up.
Finally, his time is up and he’s able to go back to the locker room and finish all his pre-game rituals and get on the ice.
Boston is an aggressive team. They tend to chirp a lot to try and provoke fights. They’re known for skirting the line and taking penalties themselves as well. Shane always revels in face offs against Rozanov. With other players, he can be all but assured that he’ll win the face off. Most centers are easy enough to read. But with Rozanov, he never really knows for sure. They lock eyes and Rozanov winks at him with his characteristic grin that makes Shane’s stomach flip flop before forcing himself to lock in.
Shane scores the first goal about midway through the period. As he celebrates for the camera, he glides past Rozanov, who makes such an immature, sour face at him that it’s comical. Glancing up, he sees his parents just a couple of rows back from the ice, cheering for him.
Shane waves and for a moment, he’s called back to the odd fantasy of the night before, wishing Rozanov could meet his mom. As he heads back to the bench, he can see both Rozanov and his mom.
“Aw, is mommy proud?” Conners says, pulling him out of his reverie.
Shane doesn’t dignify that with a response, but Rozanov is there and obviously hears the chirp as well, which brings even more dissonance between all the pieces of his life – the nonsense internet controversy about his mom, the impossible fantasy of introducing Rozanov to his mom, his plans with Rozanov later that night, and the game they’re actually playing right now. It all feels like it belongs to different Shane Hollanders.
The continued little digs from Raiders players about his mom keep colliding everything in his head as the game progresses, especially as Rozanov skates past him.
When the two of them meet at center ice to face off at the start of the final period, Shane braces himself for whatever Rozanov is going to say to add to the pile of comments about his mom. Mama’s boy. Spineless. Baby. Hiding behind her skirts, her apron strings.
Shane’s spine might actually be steel he feels so rigid.
Rozanov grins, the asshole. He wins the face off.
In the end, they eke out a victory, though Shane doesn’t score again and Rozanov doesn’t score at all, only assists Marleau in the one goal Boston gets.
His parents stick around to say goodbye before they drive back to Ottawa. He emerges freshly showered into the family area.
“Great job on the statement, sweetheart. Let’s hope it shuts them up,” his mom says. His dad catches his eyes with a nod. Yes, they all hope this is the beginning of the end of it for the sake of his mom’s obsessive tendencies. “We love you. Great goal at the start of the game.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
“Even if Rozanov was an asshole. That check to Hayden in the second period…”
“We won though.”
“Of course. And you looked very happy.”
This is where they’re comfortable, Shane knows. She’s purposefully giving them a reset.
So he takes it, accepting the resumption of normalcy between them, even though it feels a little more dishonest than usual.
“I was,” he assures her.
At the half empty apartment above the kitchen supply store, Shane turns on the fire and turns down the bed, but things feel more off than they usually do. This is usually the point where he’s filled with comfortable anticipation for Rozanov to arrive. He’s in the safest place he could possibly be. There’s no one else in the building, which he knows because he owns the building. The alley is secluded, so no one will see when Rozanov arrives. He won the game so he knows Rozanov will tease, but will also reward him. The sex will be not just good but amazing. It always is.
Shane reminds himself again that everything is fine.
Rozanov’s eyes narrow on Shane with bright intensity when he makes his way up the back stairs to the half furnished apartment. He immediately backs Shane up against the counter. Shane knocks against the empty cabinets as Rozanov kisses him.
“I knew you’d need a consolation prize,” Shane says, letting himself sink into it.
“Oh? What prize do you have?” Rozanov mouths against his neck, giving him the sensation of his teeth there. Shane wishes he could bite, but knows he can’t leave a mark. Maybe he could go a little harder.
“I think you know.”
“You make me do all the work? Find my own prize? Hollander, not fair.” Rozanov’s hands grip his hips tightly, digging into the lingering bruise he got from the Detroit game earlier in the week. The pain is thrilling.
“Maybe.”
“Maybe I just take whatever I want, huh?”
Shane doesn’t respond to that. He wants to tell Rozanov obviously, but then he knows that would just show how pathetic he can be. He’s nothing but a foolish, wanton slut around Rozanov. A part of Shane hates it.
But another part revels in the power he feels as Rozanov growls at him, lifting him onto the counter and stripping his thin sweater off him to mouth at his chest. Shane isn’t the only one who feels undone by this. Rozanov is also desperate and Shane made him that way. He makes Rozanov lose control like this.
Fuck, what would his mother think to see the two of them like this.
He’s not sure why the thought catches him. There has been too much mixing between his worlds. His parents at his house the night before a game instead of driving down. His teammates chirping about his mom. His parents standing there as Connors insulted him about his mom and Rozanov skated past.
“What’s wrong?” Rozanov asks. Apparently Shane did something to change the tenor of Rozanov gripping his hip and sucking on his nipple.
“Nothing.”
Shane slides off the counter and pulls Rozanov toward the bedroom, kissing him and then turning so they can make it to the bedroom.
“You are distracted tonight,” Rozanov says. He walks Shane up to the edge of the bed with a grin. “I will have to fix that.”
Rozanov’s strips his own shirt off, tossing it aside and grips Shane’s chin, pushing a thumb into his mouth as he mouths Shane’s neck and up to his ear.
And clearly Shane is distracted, because his phone, which he left on the side table lights up with a call, buzzing so hard it practically knocks against the lamp. His mother’s picture flashes on the screen and stays there.
Shane looks down then back to Rozanov. He tries to back up, but the bed is right there and he practically stumbles back against it, half falling onto the mattress before he can grab the phone and slide the side button to silent, something he should have done earlier but forgot.
He’s missed the call, but a text from his dad pops up almost immediately. They made it home safe and were just letting him know.
Rozanov has taken a step back, giving him space, but it’s obvious he can see the phone that Shane forgot to silence and stash away. Shane suddenly feels the weight of the long day of dealing with everything about his mom crash over him.
Rozanov stands there, chest out, waiting for him. Shane feels vulnerable in nothing but his loose sweatpants. He sets the phone face down on the side table.
“Aren’t you going to say something about my mom?”
Rozanov looks surprised. “Say something, like what?”
“Like making fun.”
“Why would I make fun of you for your mother?”
“I don’t know. Everyone else did.” He has brushed it off all week, genuinely feeling like none of it mattered. He meant it when he told his mom just not to look or think about it. But he’s apparently been braced for Rozanov to say something all night. He didn’t do it on the ice like he was supposed to. Like everyone else did. Now he needs it resolved.
“Who is everyone else? I am not everyone else? I heard Conners, but he is very dumb. Was dumb chirp, Hollander.”
“Not just him.”
“Yes, others say something, but they are dumb too. What is there to chirp? Oh no, Hollander’s mom gets him millions for photoshoots so he is in every magazine in Canada? Weird insult.”
Shane feels his face tighten in concentration. “You don’t understand.”
“What don’t I understand? That you have mom that loves you?” Rozanov stepped back from him. “Now who has mean chirps?”
“What does that mean?”
Rozanov rolls his eyes so hard that his head follows it, tilting away. “Okay, whatever.”
“No,” Shane says, feeling wrong footed in every way. “What does that mean?”
“Not everyone has nice, loving mama to make fun of.”
“Your mom is… not nice?” Shane can see immediately from Rozanov’s body language that he has it wrong. “She’s dead?” Shane saw Rozanov’s father accompany him to the draft. And he knows that he has family. He sees them every summer. He never even questioned that his mother was there. “How was I supposed to know that?” He hates the defensiveness as soon as it comes out, but it’s too late. He’s said it.
“I don’t know, Hollander,” Rozanov says, back turning fully from him now. “You never read my Wikipedia page?”
“No,” Shane says. “What, have you read mine?”
Rozanov spins. “Of course I have read your boring Wikipedia page!” he roars.
Shane flinches back, not sure how this whole night went so wrong.
Rozanov seems to realize that he was yelling about Wikipedia and turns back away, whipping his head toward the windows. He reaches down in a fluid gesture to pluck his discarded shirt from the floor, the definition in his muscles flexing as he bends.
“Maybe I go,” he says.
“No,” Shane says, not liking how his voice sounds so he says it again, urgently plastering himself behind Rozanov and gripping his chest. “No.”
“Hollander,” he says.
“No,” Shane says again. “Please don’t.” He suddenly feels like this whole thing with Rozanov is going to be over if he walks out and he desperately doesn’t want that. Why has he never looked at Rozanov’s Wikipedia page? What else does he not know about his life? Is this why he’s so cagey about his family, about Russia, about everything except hockey?
Why has Shane only thought about himself? It has always seemed like nothing he did mattered to Rozanov, like everyone was paying attention to him. But has he missed something?
Shane presses himself fully against Rozanov’s back. He snakes a hand up to his face and holds him in place so he can turn him and press them front to front.
“Please,” he says, practically breathing the word directly into Rozanov’s mouth.
Rozanov becomes almost pliant in Shane’s hands as he pushes him to the bed, their mouths connecting.
It’s not gentle. Nothing with Rozanov ever is, which is part of what Shane likes about it. The texts and chirps and the endless social media discussion about his mom is set aside as Rozanov gets him on his hands and knees and lets them both stop thinking about anything but the pleasures of their bodies for a little while.
They finish in a heap with Rozanov half draped over him, their limbs tangled in a very absurd way. They’re both a mess, barely wiped down with the towel he managed to drape over the sheets tossed to the floor. Yet Shane wishes this moment could go on forever.
He’s not sure if Rozanov lingers longer. It feels that way, but eventually he says, “I shower,” and disentangles himself.
When Rozanov emerges from the shower later, he stands in the doorway, the towel half covering him. The look on his face is one of confusion and Shane isn’t sure what he’s confused about, but he also feels a little confused, like something new happened that intruded into the condo, which has always felt like it was a pocket outside normal time and space to Shane.
“I’ll get dressed and walk you out,” Shane says.
“Okay.”
In the stairwell, Shane says, “I’m sorry about your mom. I didn’t know.”
“It was a long time ago, Hollander.”
“I’m still sorry. I didn’t mean to be defensive about my mom. I know she’s… I mean, I know she’s great.”
“Yes, Hollander. We all know you are perfect with perfect mama.”
Somehow it’s easier to be soft in the stairwell, like yet another extension of the weird, outside time space of the condo.
Shane tugs Rozanov’s jacket and pushes him slowly against the cold cinderblock wall at the base of the steps so he can kiss him one last time with a slow, lazy kiss.
“You deserve that too,” Shane says, not totally sure where the words come from. “A mom who’s like that. I’m sorry you don’t have that because… because you deserve it.”
Rozanov’s eyes go briefly wide and then he ducks his head, turning away from Shane.
“Hollander,” he says, his voice thick. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Okay,” Shane says. He kisses him one more time.
For a moment, it seems like something else is going to happen, but then Rozanov huffs out a little sound that sounds like capitulation to some thought he’s having.
“Good night, Hollander.”
He pushes the heavy security door open and doesn’t look back.