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Buck opened the front door, when he left for the grocery store, alone, he thought maybe at least when he got back there would be some kind of greeting at the door. There wasn’t though, just like how when he left Theo was attached to Eddie’s hip.
They were doing a puzzle together, Theo had picked one out at the toy store a couple days ago that he and Eddie took him too. Which was too distracting for him to come to the grocery store with him. When he asked, Theo’s response was “I want to stay with Eddie!”
Buck’s feelings were hurt, he wished they weren’t, he wished that he wasn’t affected by a 4 year old not wanting to go to the store with him. But he was. Since he got Theo, he’s been trying his hardest to make sure Theo felt safe and appreciated. For some reason, Theo latched onto Eddie, quickly too.
It was always “Eddie does the voices better,” “Can Eddie tuck me in?” “Can we go play with Eddie?” and it was driving Buck crazy. He couldn’t figure out how to get Theo to want to spend time with him and maybe not just Eddie. And he didn’t know how to communicate that with Eddie.
Until it blew up.
Theo was in the living room with Christopher, they had headphones on, they were playing the new VR game Christopher had. Theo loved spending time with Christopher too, which Buck couldn’t even be mad at. Christopher was the best kid ever.
“You alright?” Eddie asked Buck, who was now aggressively putting the groceries away, slamming the cabinets shut. Sure, it was Eddie’s house, and Buck didn’t even need to get groceries for them. They just spent so much time here, Buck wanted to replace the food they ate at Eddie's. Eddie would do the same, and has done the same.
“I’m fine,” Buck snapped, rather quickly.
“You don’t seem alright, you’re slamming my cabinets,” Eddie chuckled. It was a joke, Buck knew it was a joke, but he was already on his last straw. Something just snapped inside of him.
“I don’t need to tell you everything!” Buck almost yelled, trying to keep his voice low enough so the boys didn’t hear.
“Woah. I didn’t say you had too. Sorry man, I was just joking,” Eddie lifted his hands in defense. “The boys are right in the living room, maybe keep your voice down so they don’t hear whatever this is,”
“Theo isn’t your boy,” Buck said without even thinking, and it was already out there, he didn’t have enough time to take it back.
“What?” Eddie asked, his face automatically dropping. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Of course you didn’t, you never do!” Buck snapped.
“Where is this coming from Buck?” Eddie asked, voice soft.
“You act like your Theo’s dad! You act like we need you constantly, we don’t!” Buck yelled.
“You don’t mean that,” Eddie scoffed.
“I do,” Buck responded.
“Get out then,” Eddie said calmly, walking away from the kitchen.
“What?” Buck questioned. He was not expecting that, he was expecting Eddie to fight back, or something. Not simply just telling him to leave.
“You don’t need me, Theo doesn’t need me. Get out then. Go home. Go to your own house,” Eddie simply responded, motioning towards the front door.
Buck fucked up, he knew he did. The second Eddie told him to leave, Buck knew he fucked up. Eddie had never asked him to leave before, he just didn’t know how to come back from this, or fix it.
Buck went to grab Theo, he said goodbye to Christopher, and hugged him extra tight, which got him a weird look from Christopher. He knew in his head it might be some time till he saw Christopher again.
He did what he only knew at the moment, he drove to Maddie’s. When Theo questioned why they were leaving, Buck told him they had plans with Maddie and she would be sad if they canceled. It was a good enough excuse for now.
When Maddie opened the door and saw his face, he knew she could tell something was wrong instantly. She set Theo up with Chimney and Jee in the play room, meeting Buck back in the dining room.
“What happened?” Maddie questioned, her eyes sad.
“I just don’t understand!” Buck sighed, his voice slightly raised. He was frustrated, angry even. Theo latched onto Eddie, more than he’s even latched onto Buck. He’s tried everything, he tried to do things the same exact way Eddie did and still nothing.
Theo would constantly just ask for Eddie, no matter what Buck did. Eddie did it better. Buck was losing his mind. He blew up on Eddie, like it was his fault. Even though deep down he knew it wasn’t.
“Are you done?” Maddie asked, tapping her fingers on the glass table.
“Am I done?” Buck asked, confused on what she meant.
“Done spiraling so I can tell you how I feel,” Maddie chuckled.
“Okay Maddie, how do you feel,” Buck gave her the floor.
“Well first you need to apologize to Eddie,” Maddie responded,
“I was—”
“I’m not done,” Maddie shushed him. “It’s not his fault that Theo attached himself to Eddie. He’s a kid who lost both of his parents, things aren’t going to be linear, you need to give them both a break. And besides that, loving Eddie Diaz is a Buckley gene,”
What?
A Buckley gene? What did Maddie mean by that?
“What? Um— What do you mean by that?” Buck stumbled over his words.
“You’re not shy from loving Eddie Diaz, of course your kid— your genes— would love him just the same as you do. Regardless if it’s romantic or platonic,” Maddie laughed.
Buck loved Eddie.
Buck loved Eddie.
Oh god.
Buck loves Eddie so much, definitely not in a platonic way and Theo— Theo was just seeing the way Buck loves him and following his lead. Theo is just loving Eddie the way Buck loves him.
He needed to call Eddie now.
No.
Calling wasn’t enough, he needed to drive there and apologize to him. He needed to apologize for loving him so much; for making Theo love him so much. For screaming at Eddie that he’s not Theo’s dad and Buck doesn’t need his constant help. For being so stupid for not seeing that Theo was just following after what he was seeing at home.
“I have to go— I— Maddie, I’m sorry. I need to go right now,” Buck was scrambling to his feet, grabbing his car keys from the table. “Can you watch him, please?”
“Go,” Maddie said without hesitation, “Go get your boy,”
So Buck drove. He didn’t stop until he was parked outside of Eddie’s house, where hours prior he said words he should’ve never said.
Using his key didn’t seem right for this, that was reserved for people who didn’t say things he was afraid they couldn’t come back from. So he knocked, only once, and stood there waiting. Scared out of his mind, not knowing if Eddie would ever want to talk to him again.
“Buck?” Eddie asked, opening the door. “What? You came back to give me your key or something? That’s why you knocked. Real nice,” Eddie scoffed, shaking his head, about to slam the door right on Buck’s face.
“I love you,” Buck blurted out, the words flying out of his mouth before realizing what he said.
“What?” Eddie paused, holding the door in the place it was.
“I love you— I have loved you. Everything we do comes out of love. Theo— Theo is just copying me, he sees how much I love you. He loves you the way I love you. That’s why— that’s why Theo is the way he is with you. And— I didn’t— I swear I didn’t realize. I didn’t know. I mean, I think I knew I loved you forever, but I forced myself to ignore it. And I’m sorry— Eddie— I’m so—”
Eddie cut him off, “Buck take a breath,” He took a step forward, crowding into Buck’s space. “Can we go back to the beginning? Please?”
“The beginning?” Buck asked.
“Yes, Buck. The beginning,”
“Right. Um. I love you?” Buck refused to make eye contact with Eddie, his eyes stared at the floor. Eddie had nice floors, has Eddie always had nice floors?
“Can you look at me?” Eddie tried again.
And what else could Buck do but comply? He looked up, his eyes meeting Eddie’s soft brown ones. He didn’t look disgusted, that was a good start to this.
“The beginning?” Eddie asked, a small smirk on his lips.
“I love you,” Buck said, watching Eddie intensely, waiting to see if the look on his face changed.
“And?”
Jesus Christ. Was Eddie going to make him recite everything he said?
“That Theo was just following my lead, that’s why he latched onto you, because I love you. He was just copying me,” Buck said, with a shaky voice.
Eddie just stood there staring at him, he didn’t say anything, he just shook his head and smiled. One of the brightest smiles Buck had ever seen, Eddie’s canine teeth peaking out. Buck couldn’t help thinking that he wanted Eddie to bite him. But that was not the point right now, Eddie was laughing, he was standing in front of Buck after he confessed his love, and he was laughing.
“I’m— I’m sorry. I— Uh. I should go, probably. Yeah— I’m. I’m gonna go,” Buck could feel his cheeks getting red, and wet. When did he start crying? He backed away from Eddie, his eyes falling right back to the floor.
“Hey— Buck. Wait,” Eddie called out, grabbing his wrist.
It felt electric, more than any other time they touched. Was it because he knew now? That he loved Eddie? Was his body responding in a certain way now that he knew?
“Evan,”
Buck was immediately locked back onto Eddie, that name wasn’t used lightly. Eddie had only used it one other time, when Buck was finding out he was put in his will for Christopher. They didn’t use that, he didn’t call Buck that.
“Will you let me say anything before your mind starts going a million different places?” Eddie asked, his eyes softening.
“Okay,” Buck responded, in a hushed tone.
“I love you. I’ve been trying to learn to accept it— accept that I’m gay. I think that’s why I got so upset earlier, I thought we were on the same page. I thought that’s what this was, I didn’t know it was different for you,” Eddie admitted.
“It’s the same Eddie. God. Of course it’s the same. It’s always been the same, I was just so afraid; afraid that I was falling into the stereotype of bisexual man falling in love with his straight best friend,” Buck laughed.
“Definitely not straight,” Eddie pointed out.
“Yeah,” Buck breathed, “I can definitely see that now,”
“So you love me?” Eddie asked again, a new found confidence radiating through him.
“I do. So much,”
“Good, because it makes loving you less weird now,” Eddie giggled, his hand on Buck’s wrist, moving to his waist. He didn’t hesitate in pulling Buck closer this time.
“I’m gonna kiss you,” Eddie announced.
“Kiss me,” Buck pleaded, maybe too desperately.
Eddie didn’t wait, he pulled Buck in, connecting their lips together. The electricity Buck felt when Eddie’s hand connected to his wrist earlier was still there, but stronger. He could feel it all throughout his body, every single ounce of him felt electric. The kiss was soft, nothing like how their love confession was. It was careful, and sweet, their bodies tangled together in the warmth of Los Angeles around them.
“We gave our neighbors quite a show, didn’t we?” Eddie chuckled, barely pulling away from Buck’s lips.
“We really did this right in the front yard, they’re gonna think we’re crazy,” Buck groaned.
“Baby, I think they already knew that. I think they’re just going to know we’re in love now,” Eddie pressed another kiss to his lips.
“Baby?” Buck smiled, probably way too hard.
“If that’s okay?” Eddie asked.
“It’s more than okay,” Buck smiled, even harder, "Actually, please always just say that,”
“Buck no more, only baby for now on,” Eddie smirked.
“Mm, yup! Exactly,” Buck kissed Eddie this time.
“Where is Theo though, actually?” Eddie questioned, realizing now Buck came alone.
“He’s still with Maddie. Oh she’s going to love hearing this,” Buck laughed, “Especially once I tell her that hearing that loving Eddie Diaz is a Buckley gene made me realize how much I loved you,”
“A Buckley gene? Now is it?” Eddie raised his eyebrow.
“Shut up,” Buck groaned, kissing Eddie again.