Chapter Text
From the outside, Jeon Jungkook had done remarkably well for himself.
That was what people always seemed to think, anyway, on the rare occasions someone learned enough about his life to form an opinion about it. At twenty-three, he owned a small apartment in a reasonably good neighborhood, had no debts beyond the ordinary monthly bills, attended university three days a week, and had a quiet job in the archives of one of the city’s larger libraries. His apartment was clean. His clothes were clean. His refrigerator was never completely empty. He remembered to pay the electricity bill before the final reminder arrived, knew how to cook enough meals that he did not have to survive on instant noodles, and had even managed to keep three houseplants alive for almost two years.
There was nothing obviously wrong with his life.
His parents had died several years ago, but even that tragedy had been painfully ordinary. No attack, no supernatural feud, no vampire losing control or werewolf pack dispute like the dramatic stories people sometimes whispered about. They had been human, both of them, and they had died from natural causes within two years of each other. They had loved their only son deeply and planned carefully enough that Jungkook had been able to finish secondary school without worrying about money. Their inheritance had paid for his apartment and the first years of his education. Most of it was gone now, but that had always been the intention. It had given him a safe beginning to adulthood rather than making him wealthy.
He lived in a country where humans, vampires, and werewolves had shared cities for generations. There were laws protecting all three species, universities accepted all of them, and most workplaces barely cared what species was written on someone’s identification documents. Vampires had regulated blood sources, werewolves had medical leave protections surrounding difficult heats and ruts, and humans no longer had to worry about becoming second-class citizens simply because the people living next door could smell better or live several centuries longer than they could.
There were problems, certainly. There were always problems when people lived together. But there was peace. There was prosperity. There was safety. Jungkook knew exactly how fortunate he was. That knowledge occasionally made the loneliness worse.
He sat among thirty-seven students during his literature lectures and could go an entire day without having a real conversation with any of them. He was the only man in his year, something that had initially seemed mildly amusing and had quickly become another invisible wall between himself and everyone else. The women in his classes were not cruel. Quite the opposite. They smiled at him, borrowed his notes, asked whether he understood an assignment and occasionally included him in group chats about exams. Two of them had his number. They simply had their own lives. Their own friendships. Their own apartments full of people.
Jungkook had once overheard three classmates discussing a movie night while they packed their bags after a lecture. One had complained that seven people were already coming and her living room was too small. Jungkook had smiled faintly while placing his notebook into his backpack, pretending not to hear them. Seven people in one living room had sounded impossibly crowded. It had also sounded wonderful.
His job suited him almost too well. The library archive was cool, quiet and smelled pleasantly of old paper, dust, leather, and the faint metallic scent of the climate-control system. Jungkook loved books enough that spending hours cataloguing old collections rarely felt tedious. He loved discovering handwritten notes in margins. He loved opening boxes that had not been touched in twenty years. He loved repairing labels and carefully entering information into the archive database.
He did not love that he could sometimes work an entire six-hour shift without anyone entering the archive except his supervisor.
His phone reflected his life with almost insulting accuracy. His boss. Two classmates. The dentist. Several automated service numbers. His parents’ old contacts, which he had never managed to delete. That was essentially it.
Saturday nights were the worst. During the week, Jungkook could convince himself that he was busy. There were lectures, assignments, grocery shopping, laundry, work and reading. He could come home tired, make dinner, shower and fall asleep before the silence had time to become oppressive.
Saturday had too many hours. He could have changed things. That was what made the problem so frustrating. Nobody was keeping him inside. There were clubs for young werewolves all over the city. There were university societies. There were sports teams, book clubs, gaming groups, volunteer organizations and community centers. Jungkook could have found another job where he worked beside people instead of beside boxes. He could have downloaded one of the dozen friendship apps his classmates talked about.
He knew all of that. But Jungkook liked being alone. That was the contradiction he could never explain properly, even to himself. He liked choosing when to speak. He liked reading for five uninterrupted hours. He liked coming home and knowing nobody had moved his belongings. He liked eating dinner with a book propped against the salt shaker. He did not crave parties or crowded restaurants or conversations with strangers.
He just did not want to be untouched. That was different. At least it felt different to him. Jungkook was an omega, adopted. It did not determine his personality, his career, his intelligence or any of the other things old-fashioned people had once tried to attach to secondary gender, but biology remained biology. Touch mattered to most werewolves, and omegas could be particularly sensitive to prolonged social isolation. Packs naturally exchanged scent and physical affection. Parents held their pups. Siblings piled together on couches. Friends leaned against one another without thinking about it.
Jungkook had nobody. Sometimes he would wake in the middle of the night with his arms wrapped tightly around his pillow and a physical ache beneath his ribs that had nothing to do with illness. He wanted someone to put a hand on his hair. He wanted to rest his head against someone’s shoulder. He wanted to be hugged for longer than the polite three seconds exchanged between acquaintances. He wanted someone to call him something affectionate and mean it, even just a little.
And eventually, after one particularly miserable Saturday night spent scrolling through his phone until nearly three in the morning, Jungkook had searched for solutions. The internet had provided one. Registered blood-source work. At first he had dismissed it. Then he had read more.
Blood sourcing had changed enormously over the previous decades. Professional programs matched registered vampires with healthy adult donors under strict medical supervision. Blood sources were paid well for relatively short appointments, underwent routine screenings, and could specify everything from the age range of the vampire to the preferred feeding location. Vampires were screened even more thoroughly.
The physical effects fascinated Jungkook. A vampire’s bite temporarily paralyzed a blood source. It was an evolutionary mechanism, though in modern regulated feeding it mostly served to make the process surprisingly calm. Depending on the vampire and donor, the paralysis could last anywhere from several minutes to considerably longer after feeding ended. The donor remained conscious and could feel touch but could not voluntarily move until the venom had been metabolized.
The official websites treated that as a side effect. Anonymous forums told a different story. Some donors loved it. Not sexually, necessarily. Jungkook had been embarrassed by how relieved he felt when he discovered that distinction. Some described feeding as intensely peaceful. They wrote about being held while the vampire drank, about warmth and gentle hands, about being looked after afterward until they could move again.
One omega had written that she booked the same vampire twice a month because the hour after feeding was the only time she allowed herself to be completely cared for. Jungkook had stared at that sentence for a very long time. Then he had registered.
Two weeks later, he was standing in the lobby of a discreet hotel with his heart trying to escape through his throat. His paperwork had been approved. His bloodwork was perfect. His physical examination had found no problems.
He had eaten exactly what the information packet recommended. He had drunk enough water. He had avoided alcohol, strenuous exercise and the supplements listed in bold letters on the instruction sheet.
He knew the procedure. Check in. Confirm identity. Receive the room number. Introduce himself to the vampire. Discuss medical information and boundaries. Remove clothing around the feeding site as needed. Allow the vampire to position him. Remain calm during the bite. Wait for the paralysis to disappear. Eat and drink afterward. Report any unusual symptoms. It was straightforward. Jungkook was terrified.
The woman behind the reception desk studied her computer while Jungkook tried not to wring his fingers together. Then she smiled. “You’ve been matched with Seokjin today. He’s one of our most experienced vampires. Room sixteen.”
Jungkook managed to thank her. Experienced. The word followed him toward the elevator. Experienced probably meant old. Vampires aged strangely. They matured physically at approximately the same rate as humans and werewolves before aging slowed dramatically in adulthood. An experienced vampire could therefore be forty. Or four hundred.
Jungkook stared at the glowing elevator numbers and imagined knocking on the door to find someone’s grandfather waiting for him. He had secretly hoped for someone young. Not because it should matter. This was work. He was being ridiculous. Still, his stomach twisted as he stepped from the elevator and followed the signs down the corridor.
Room sixteen appeared far too quickly. Jungkook stopped outside it. He could leave. Technically, he could leave at any point before feeding began. The contract made that extremely clear. He would not be punished. He simply would not be paid.
His apartment would still be empty when he got home. Jungkook swallowed. He raised his hand. Knocked. For several horrible seconds, nothing happened.
Then the door opened. Jungkook forgot every carefully rehearsed introduction. Seokjin was not a grandfather. He did not even look particularly old. He appeared perhaps a handful of years older than Jungkook, although appearances meant very little with vampires. He was tall and broad-shouldered, dressed simply in dark trousers and a loose shirt. His face was striking enough that Jungkook’s already frantic thoughts simply stopped for a moment.
But it was not his appearance that caught Jungkook most strongly. It was his expression. Warm and calm. Almost immediately amused by something. “Come inside, little one.”
Jungkook’s heart stumbled. Little one. Two words. Two completely ordinary words from a stranger. His omega practically melted. He bowed much too deeply before stepping inside.
The room looked nothing like the frightening clinical space Jungkook had somehow imagined despite knowing they were meeting in a hotel. There was a large bed, two comfortable chairs, a small table stocked with bottled water and packaged snacks, and soft lighting. The curtains were partly closed.
Seokjin shut the door but did not lock it. Jungkook noticed. He appreciated that. “I am Jungkook, and I have come to feed you today,” he recited.
His voice trembled so badly that he wanted to disappear. Seokjin’s mouth softened. “Welcome, Kookie. I’m Jin-hyung. Are you nervous?”
Kookie. Hyung. Jungkook blinked. He had expected formal language. Mr. Kim, perhaps. Sir, if the vampire was particularly traditional. Certainly not a nickname within thirty seconds of meeting and absolutely not an invitation to call him hyung. Something warm spread painfully through Jungkook’s chest. He nodded. There was no point pretending.
Jin did not laugh. “That’s okay. First time?”
Another nod. “We’ll go slowly, then.”
Jungkook remembered the procedure. Clothing. Right. Before he could lose his nerve, he caught the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head.
Jin stared at him. Not at his body. At his face. Then he looked at the shirt Jungkook was clutching. “Do you have somewhere important to be, Kookie?”
Jungkook froze. “No?”
The answer came out embarrassingly small. Jin held out a hand for the shirt. Jungkook gave it to him. Instead of tossing it aside, Jin folded it once and placed it neatly over the back of a chair. “We’re not racing anyone.”
“Oh.” Jungkook suddenly felt extremely naked. He crossed his arms instinctively before remembering that he was supposed to provide access to his neck.
Jin apparently noticed his discomfort because he made no move toward him. “Since you’re a new blood source for me, hyung needs to ask you a few things first.” Hyung. Again.
Jungkook nodded quickly. “Any medication that isn’t listed on your medical form?”
“No.” Jungkook told him.
“Any pain today?” Hyung asked.
“No.” Jungkook only felt nervous.
“Dizziness?” Hyung looked him up and down.
“No.” Jungkook shook his head.
“Did you eat?” The vampire continued.
“Yes.” Jungkook said.
“Good boy.” Jungkook’s brain stopped. Jin continued as though nothing extraordinary had happened. “How long do you usually stay paralyzed?”
“I don’t know. This is my first feeding.” Jungkook told him.
“Right. Of course. Your screening bite only used a tiny amount of venom.” Jin considered him. “Do you know whether you’re sensitive to paralytic venom?”
Jungkook did know something. His screening technician had mentioned that his recovery had been slower than average. He had deliberately not been concerned. “Probably,” he admitted.
“How long did your screening take?” Hyung asked.
“Twenty-three minutes.” Jin’s eyebrows rose. For one terrible second Jungkook worried he would be rejected.
Instead Jin merely nodded. “Then we’ll plan for a long recovery. Nothing wrong with that.”
Relief made Jungkook’s shoulders drop. “Sorry.”
Jin frowned. “For what?”
“If it takes long.” He explained.
“Kookie, I’m being given lunch and paid for your time. You’re the one giving blood. You don’t apologize to me because your body needs extra recovery afterward.”
Jungkook looked at the carpet. Nobody had spoken unkindly to him. That made his throat ache more. “Okay.”
“Afterward, would you rather feed yourself when your hands start working, or do you want hyung to help you eat and drink?” Was that even an option?
Jungkook answered too quickly. “Help.” Silence. Heat flooded his face. He stared harder at the carpet again. That had sounded desperate. Because it was desperate. This entire thing was desperate.
He had registered as a blood source because strangers on the internet had said vampires held them afterward. He had taken his clothes off in front of a man he had known for three minutes because he wanted to be cuddled. He was planning to let someone sink fangs into his neck because the venom would give him an excuse not to move away from another person’s body. Pathetic.
He waited for Jin to understand. Instead the vampire simply said, “Of course.” Jungkook cautiously looked up. Jin was studying him with an expression Jungkook could not quite interpret. Then his gaze shifted slightly. “I can smell that you’re an omega.”
Jungkook stiffened. “I’ll stay well away from your scent gland,” Jin continued calmly. “But there are two things I want you to know beforehand so they don’t frighten you. Some omegas become instinctive during the afterflow. You might try to scent me without meaning to. That’s normal. I won’t scent you back, and I’ll move you away from my neck if necessary.”
Jungkook nodded. That made sense. “And because paralysis affects muscle control and your omega physiology doesn’t completely shut down with it, your body may react in ways you can’t control. Increased slick production can happen. That’s also normal and nothing to be embarrassed about.”
Jungkook wanted the carpet to swallow him. People did not say things like that. Not casually. Not while looking directly at him. Jungkook barely acknowledged slick existed. He bought suppressants from a pharmacy two neighborhoods away despite there being a perfectly good pharmacy across the street from his apartment because he once saw one of his classmates working there. Jin was discussing it as calmly as he might discuss the weather. Jungkook nodded without looking up. “All right?”
“Yes, hyung.” The word escaped before he could think about it.
Jin smiled. Something about that smile made Jungkook feel as though he had done something right. “Good. Now, Kookie, I’m going to sit on the bed. Take off your shoes. Your trousers can stay on or come off, whichever is more comfortable, and then come sit with me.”
Jin removed his own shirt before sitting against the headboard. Jungkook’s nerves returned immediately. Jin’s chest was warm-toned rather than unnaturally pale, destroying another ridiculous assumption Jungkook had apparently carried about vampires. His body looked strong but soft enough to rest against.
Jungkook wanted to do exactly that. He removed his shoes. His fingers went to the button of his trousers. He hesitated. The information packet had said less restrictive clothing could make longer paralysis more comfortable. That was the practical reason. Nothing else.
Jungkook pushed his trousers down and stepped out of them, leaving himself in his boxers. He could feel Jin watching him, but the gaze never became invasive. Jungkook approached the bed. “Come here.”
He climbed onto the mattress and awkwardly tried to work out how exactly he was supposed to sit. Jin solved the problem for him. Large hands settled around Jungkook’s waist. For the first time in longer than Jungkook could remember, another person lifted him. It was effortless. Jungkook gave a tiny startled sound as Jin repositioned him until he was sitting astride the vampire’s lap, chest against chest, his head naturally settling near Jin’s shoulder. Jin was warm. Jungkook had expected cool skin. Instead the vampire’s bare chest was wonderfully warm against his own. His omega went quiet. Completely quiet.
The constant restless ache Jungkook had grown so accustomed to that he barely noticed it anymore simply disappeared. Jin touched the side of his neck carefully. Professional fingers traced the safe feeding area, avoiding his gland. “Kookie?”
“Yes?” He answered.
“Ready?” Jungkook closed his eyes. He nodded. Jin’s arm tightened securely around his waist. Then came the bite. There was pressure. A brief sting. And then nothing hurt at all. Warmth rushed through Jungkook’s body so rapidly that he nearly gasped. His muscles released. Every single one. His hands fell uselessly where they had been resting. His legs became heavy. His head tipped naturally against Jin because his neck could no longer support it properly.
He could not move. He could not lift a finger. He could not turn his head. He should have panicked. Instead Jungkook felt safe. Jin held him. That was all. Hyung held him. One arm remained firm around his waist, supporting his entire body, while the other hand slowly moved along his arm. Up. Down. Up. Down.
Jungkook felt everything. The warmth of Jin’s chest. The subtle movement of breathing. The pressure of fingers stroking his skin. The mattress beneath his knees. The strange pulling sensation at his neck. His own heartbeat gradually slowing. He could not perform. Could not wonder where to put his hands. Could not worry whether he had been hugging for too long. Could not pull away too quickly because he feared the other person wanted him gone.
For these minutes, he was allowed to simply exist in someone’s arms. His eyes burned. He hoped Jin would not notice. The vampire’s hand moved from Jungkook’s arm to his back. Slow circles. Jungkook wanted to cry. He had not realized how badly he needed this.
He had imagined the paralysis would feel restrictive. Instead it felt like permission. Permission to stop being responsible for himself. Permission to lean. Permission to be held. Jin drank slowly. Jungkook had no idea how long it lasted. Probably only minutes. It felt simultaneously endless and heartbreakingly brief.
Eventually the pressure at his neck changed. The fangs withdrew. Jungkook felt Jin’s tongue briefly pass over the bite to seal it before the vampire settled back. “Done, little one.” No. The thought was immediate and childish. No, not yet.
Jungkook could not speak properly while the venom held him, and for once he was grateful. “It’s going to take a while before you can move. Hyung isn’t going anywhere.”
Jungkook’s eyes slipped closed. Thank you. He could not say it. Jin’s palm rested over his stomach now, rubbing gently through slow, absent movements while the other arm supported him. “You did so well.” Jungkook’s throat tightened. “Such a good little blood source.”
His eyes burned again. “Kookie was very brave.” Stop. Please never stop. Jungkook did not know what to do with the ache opening inside him. His parents had called him their baby long after he had grown tall enough to complain about it. His mother had rubbed his back when he was sick. His father had pulled him into crushing hugs whenever Jungkook returned home after even a single night away.
He had forgotten. Or perhaps he had forced himself to forget because remembering was unbearable. Being somebody’s little one. He had missed it so much. Jin continued stroking him.
Minutes passed. Jungkook drifted somewhere between sleep and wakefulness. At some point sensation changed in his feet. Pins and needles. Then his toes twitched. Jungkook ignored them. He could move soon. He did not want to. The tiny movement apparently had not escaped vampire senses.
Jin said nothing at first. His hand continued moving. Jungkook’s fingers began responding next. He kept them deliberately still. More minutes passed. “Kookie.”
Jungkook pretended not to hear. Jin’s chest moved beneath him with what might have been a silent laugh. “Your toes have been moving for a while.” Jungkook made a small, unhappy sound before he could stop himself.
Silence. Then Jin’s arm tightened around him. “Shh. It’s okay.” Jungkook wanted to bury his face against Jin’s neck. His muscles still felt heavy enough that he could not quite manage it.
Something touched his lips. Sweet. “Kookie, open.” Jungkook obeyed. A small glucose candy slipped onto his tongue. “Good boy.” He sucked on it slowly.
Another followed once Jin was satisfied he could swallow normally. Jungkook did not open his eyes. He could move his hands now. He still did not. He waited for Jin to tell him the appointment was finished. Instead a straw touched his lower lip. “Drink for hyung.”
Jungkook opened his mouth. Cool water filled it. He swallowed. Jin waited. Another sip. Then another. Jungkook drank until the bottle was empty. “Very good.” Nobody should be allowed to say those words so gently. Jungkook’s entire body felt warm.
He was becoming more aware with every passing minute, and awareness brought embarrassment with it. He was sitting nearly naked in a stranger’s lap. He had apparently decided to pretend he was still paralyzed because he did not want to stop being cuddled. He had made a miserable sound when Jin pointed out that he could move. What was wrong with him? Jin must think he was crazy. Perhaps the vampire had dealt with clingy blood sources before. Perhaps that was why he was being patient. Jungkook finally forced his eyes open.
Jin was looking down at him. There was no disgust in his expression. Only softness. “You back with me?”
Jungkook nodded. “Words?”
Jungkook shook his head.
“Okay just nods and shakes then Any dizziness?” Hyung said. Little nob
“Headache?” Shake
“Nausea?” Shake
“Good.” Jungkook waited. Jin gently moved him from his lap and placed him in the center of the bed. Cold air immediately replaced the warmth. Jungkook hated it. His omega whined somewhere inside him. Done. It was done. He had known it would end. Of course it would end. This was an appointment, not affection. Jin stood. Jungkook stared down at his hands.
His fingers worked perfectly now. He should dress himself. Jin walked toward the chair. Jungkook expected him to hand over the clothes. Instead the vampire picked up his shirt and returned. “Arms up for hyung.”
Jungkook looked at him. Surely he had misheard. Jin waited. Slowly, Jungkook raised both arms. The shirt came down over his hands, then his head. Jin carefully tugged it into place.
Jungkook’s heart began beating faster. “There.”
Jin picked up his trousers. Jungkook stared. Jin crouched and guided Jungkook’s feet through the trouser legs one at a time. Then he pulled the fabric up to Jungkook’s knees.
“Can you stand for me?” Jungkook nodded. He tried. His knees immediately weakened. Jin caught him before he could fall. “Nope. Not yet.”
Jungkook’s face burned. “Kookie, What did I say about apologizing because your body needs recovery? It takes time” Jungkook swallowed. Jin placed an arm around his waist, lifted him slightly as though Jungkook weighed nothing, and pulled the trousers over his hips.
Jungkook could barely think. His shoes came next. Jin put them on him. Actually put them on him. One foot and then the other, tightening the laces while Jungkook sat silently on the edge of the bed. Every small act of care hurt in the best possible way. He wanted to keep it. He wanted to take this feeling home and hide it somewhere safe. “All done.”
Jungkook looked down at himself. Fully dressed. He should leave. He tried standing again. His legs were steadier but not perfect. Jin watched him take two steps. Then apparently made a decision. “All right little one.”
Jungkook barely had time to wonder what that meant before Jin lifted him again. One arm beneath his thighs. Jungkook instinctively wrapped his arms around Jin’s shoulders. Jungkook stared at him.
Jin looked entirely unconcerned. Jungkook should be embarrassed. Instead he allowed Jin to carry him.
At the elevator, Jin shifted him easily onto one hip. Jungkook’s arms tightened around his shoulders. People might see. The thought should have bothered him more. It did not. His cheek rested against Jin’s shoulder. He could smell the vampire now beneath the neutral hotel soap, something warm and faintly sweet that Jungkook’s omega immediately wanted to memorize.
The elevator arrived. Jin carried him inside. Jungkook remained silent. He felt small. Not physically. Jungkook was hardly a small man. But protected. Looked after. For the first time in years, somebody else was deciding where he needed to go and making sure he got there safely.
The elevator doors opened into the lobby. Jungkook finally became self-conscious when the receptionist looked up. She did not seem surprised. Perhaps vampires carried recovering blood sources through the lobby every day.
Jin carried him straight outside to the taxi stand. Only then did he lower Jungkook onto his feet, keeping a hand around his arm until he was certain Jungkook was stable.
A taxi pulled forward. Jin opened the back door. “Where do you live, baby?” Baby. Jungkook told him. He stumbled over the street name once. Jin repeated the address to the driver, spoke briefly with him and handed over payment before Jungkook could protest.
Then he guided Jungkook into the back seat. Jungkook looked at him helplessly. Jin reached into his pocket and took out a small card. His personal contact information was printed on it. He placed it in Jungkook’s hand. “Send hyung a message when you’re safely inside your apartment.” Jungkook curled his fingers around the card. Jungkook nodded. “Promise?” He nodded again. “Good boy.”
Jin leaned inside and pulled the seat belt across Jungkook’s body. Click. The gesture was absurdly simple. Jungkook nearly cried. “Rest tonight. Eat something salty when you get home. More water. No hot shower for a few hours because your blood pressure might drop.”
Jungkook nodded. “And if you feel sick? Call the medical number. Or me.”
Jungkook looked up. Jin smiled. “Or you,” he whispered.
“Exactly.” Jin closed the door. The taxi moved. Jungkook watched through the window until the hotel disappeared behind another building.
For several minutes, he sat completely still. Then awareness returned properly. Not physical awareness. Mental awareness. Jungkook covered his face with both hands. What had he done? What had that been? He had behaved like…Like… He did not even know. He had climbed into a stranger’s lap in his underwear. That part was technically normal. He had allowed the stranger to drink his blood. Also normal, given the circumstances. But then he had practically melted into Jin. He had pretended not to be able to move. He had made that awful disappointed noise. He had let Jin feed him candy. He had drunk from a straw like a child. He had lifted his arms when told. He had let Jin dress him. He had let Jin put on his shoes. He had allowed himself to be carried through an entire hotel. Baby. Little one. Good boy. Jungkook pressed his palms harder over his burning face. Jin must think he was insane.
An experienced vampire had probably fed from hundreds of blood sources. Did they all act like that? Of course not. Please let them all act like that. Jungkook tried to remember the official aftercare information. Emotional vulnerability was normal after feeding. Instinctive behavior was normal. Omega responses were normal. But surely there were limits to normal.
He lowered his hands and looked at the little card. Kim Seokjin. There was a number beneath the name. Jungkook’s stomach twisted. Maybe Jin had given him the card because regulations required it. No. The facility already had Jin’s information. Maybe every blood source got one. Probably. He should stop inventing meaning where there was none.
That was dangerous. This was exactly what Jungkook had wanted. Paid affection. Temporary care. Safe physical contact with clearly defined boundaries. It was perfect because it was not real. He could not get hurt by something that was explicitly an arrangement. So why did his chest ache when he remembered Jin saying hyung wasn’t going anywhere?
The taxi stopped outside his apartment building. Jungkook reached for the door. The driver immediately turned around. “Wait.”
Jungkook froze. The man got out, walked around the car and opened Jungkook’s door. “You don’t have to…”
“Already paid for.” Apparently everyone had decided Jungkook was incapable of doing anything for himself today. Strangely, he did not hate it. The driver walked beside him into the building and waited until Jungkook had successfully opened his apartment door. “Inside?”
Jungkook nodded. “Thank you.”
“No problem.” The door closed.
Silence. Jungkook leaned against it. His apartment looked exactly the same as it had that morning. The contrast was immediate. Twenty minutes ago there had been an arm around his waist. Now the refrigerator hummed in the kitchen. That was all. Jungkook slowly removed his shoes. For a moment he imagined Jin crouching to do it for him again. He shut his eyes. This had been a mistake. Not because he disliked it.
Because he had liked it far too much. Jungkook walked to the couch and collapsed onto it. His phone was in his pocket. The card remained clutched in his hand. He should message. He had promised. Nothing more. Jungkook added the number. The contact-name field appeared. He typed Seokjin. Deleted it. Jin. Deleted that too. His thumb hovered over the keyboard. Jin-hyung. He stared at it. Then saved the contact. His phone now contained one more real person than it had that morning. Jungkook opened a new message. He wrote too much. Deleted it. Wrote another version. Deleted that too. Finally he forced himself to keep it simple.
Safely home. Thank you.
Send.
Jungkook threw the phone onto the couch as though it had burned him. His heart hammered. Ridiculous. He stood and went to the kitchen. Salt. They had told him to eat something salty. He opened a cupboard. Crackers. Perfect.
His phone buzzed. Jungkook nearly dropped the packet. He hurried back to the couch, then deliberately slowed himself because hurrying looked desperate even though nobody was there to witness it.
One new message. He opened it.
Glad to hear it. Hyung hopes to see you again soon, baby. Eat something and get some sleep.
Jungkook read it. Then again. Again. Hyung hopes to see you again soon. His omega practically purred. Jungkook sank onto the couch. It meant nothing. Jin was being professional. He probably knew nervous blood sources needed reassurance after their first appointment. Baby probably meant nothing either. Little one probably meant nothing. Kookie definitely meant nothing. Jungkook understood all of that. He understood it perfectly.