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Wylan was hiding in the bathroom of the mansion, again. Today was the 2nd anniversary of the day his father decided to get rid on him, and he was not coping very well. When Jesper asked him if he was okay in the morning, but he dismissed his worry quickly, saying that he’ll be fine, that it wasn’t a big deal. He kind of regretted it now.
They had properly moved in together in his father’s house after the events of the auction, a little less than one year ago, and Wylan still didn’t like being alone in this place. It reminded him too much of his father, and the way he was treated during all these years. He pressed the heels of his hands on his eyes, trying his best to cry, and not get overwhelmed by the memories but it was pointless.
Eventually, he lost track of time – Inej calls it ‘dissociating’ – and was brought back with the feeling of cold air on his face, and hands wrapped around his wrists, gently applying pressure again and again in the same pattern.
He blinked a few times and opened his eyes, seeing Jesper, who was sat in front of him.
When their eyes met, Wylan saw that some of the worry in Jesper’s eyes disappeared.
“Hi sweetheart, how are you feeling?” Jesper asked.
“Dizzy” answered Wylan with a raspy voice.
Jesper smiled, and tucked a strand of Wylan’s hair away, “That makes sense yeah, did you eat or drink something since I left this morning?”
When Wylan shook his head, Jesper stood up, eager to help.
“Alright, I’m just going to bring you something from the kitchen, and then we can talk, okay?”
“Thank you” nodded Wylan.
Jesper gave him a thumbs up and left, coming back only a few minutes later with a full glass of water and some grapes in a fancy cup.
“Drink up”, he instructed, sitting down and putting the glass in Wylan’s hands.
After Wylan drank half of his glass, and Jesper saw that he seemed to feel a little better, he talked again.
“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have left you alone here.”
“It’s not your fault, Jesper. I told you it would be okay.” reassured Wylan, taking a few grapes and popping them in his mouth.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Wylan pondered the offer for a few seconds, and eventually started talking, his voice less raspy than before, “I guess I never managed to feel safe in this place, even with you there. I feel like living in a haunted house, I see my father everywhere, and every room of the mansion reminds me of him in some way.”
“I see yeah. Why didn’t you tell me? I’m not blaming you, of course. I just want to know.”
Wylan shrugged. “I don’t really know, I guess I thought it would go away at some point. But it didn’t. And I hate it, because I want to feel safe here. I’m allowed to live here with you. My mind just doesn’t seem to agree.”
“Do you want to move out?” asked Jesper.
Wylan shook his head, “no, this place is mine. I don’t want my father to win on that too.”
Jesper smiled. “Well, we could renovate it then. Paint the walls or burn some paintings”
Wylan chuckled, “yeah that sounds nice.”
They knew that the ghost of his father won’t leave Wylan’s mind anytime soon, but making their home really theirs would sure help.