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“Nothing,” Colt sighed, pushing the Petrova Scope away from him, glancing as Ryland twirled a pen between his fingers, his free hand balling into a fist. “We’ll find him-”
“We’re running out of time,” he muttered, scratching something off. “His entire ship is xenonite, Colt. He has literally no way of stopping the leak, and the astrophage was probably the only thing protecting him from the radiation sickness that, need I remind you, killed his entire crew-”
“Ryland, he’s smart,” Colt said, floating over to rest his hands on his twin brother’s shoulders. “He’ll be fine. That little rock is a tough guy.”
Ryland made a face, drumming his fingers against the console as Colt looked over his shoulder, wincing as he saw all of the sectors they’d already checked marked with a resounding red x. He sat down in the pilots seat, strapping himself in so he wouldn’t float away. “Which sector next?”
“Here,” he answered, tapping a blank sector. Colt nodded, flicking a few switches as the spin-drives hummed back to life. His hands tightened around the controls, turning towards Ryland as he curled into his own chair. “We’re running out of time.”
“Ryland-”
“His ship isn’t insulated for radiation,” he said. “The only insulation he had was the astrophage and now it’s gone. So if he manages to survive off the limited life support he has, we have no idea how long he has until the radiation sickness hits, and it’s not like he has any way to fight it.” He pressed his head against the headrest. “Colt, if he dies, his entire species goes with him. And we can’t fix it.”
“So we’ll find him.”
“And if we’re too late?”
Colt tensed, feeling Ryland’s glare boring into the back of his head. Ryland tucked his knees against his chest. “We just…what? Go home? Ignore the fact that we met sentient life? Ignore the fact that we’re not alone in the universe? And that because we couldn’t save him, we just…” he threw up his hands with a groan. “He’s the reason we get to go home, Colt. He’s the reason you-”
“You know I don’t want to talk about her right now.”
“I know that you want to go to back to her, Colt. I know you still love her and-”
“And what, it’s been 13 years? So far? It’ll have been 26 before we get back, Ry, so no, I really do not want to talk about it.”
“Blip-A detected.”
“Shut the front door,” Ryland yelped, shooting up as Colt reached up to activate the Petrova scope. His twin practically leaped to it, pressing his face against the eye hole. “Oh my God, we found him.” He pulled back to stare at Colt, tears already springing from his eyes. “We found him!”
Colt reached out towards him, wrapping his arms tightly around his twin as Ryland sobbed into his shoulder. He rubbed circles into his brother’s back, as pressure built behind his eyes. “Well, let’s go get him,” he said as Ryland pulled away, nodding frantically, strapping into his seat.
“We found him,” Ryland whispered, knee bouncing. “We found him. We found him, Colt. He can go home.” He laughed, halfway delirious. “He’s gonna go home, he’s gonna see Adrian again. He’s gonna save his star.”
The twins practically slammed themselves against the xenonite barrier when they saw the Eridian make his way towards them. Their helmets even fogging up from the tears streaming down their faces.
Ryland rushed Rocky back into his xenonite ball, getting him back into the stable enclosure on the Hail Mary while he flushed the taumeoba-contaminated atmosphere from the ship. Colt had exhaustedly flopped onto his cot, falling asleep nearly as soon as his head hit the pillow.
Which left Ryland with time to think.
“I wish I knew how much the radiation impacted you,” he mumbled, leaning against Rocky’s ball as they both watched Colt sleep. “You guys always planned to go home; you have nothing like the beetles as a fail-safe.”
“Yes, yes. Eridians not know about Radiation sickness,” Rocky chirped. “Not know what would happen. Did not plan.”
“I’d almost say that we should go with you.” Ryland tilted his head back, staring blankly up at the ceiling. “Just, in case. Because we have the translator and the beetles so we could explain to the other Eridians what happened and how to save your star-”
“But Grace and Colt go home, statement. Colt needs to see mate.”
“That’s the problem with all of it,” he huffed. “Colt can pretend that he doesn’t wanna talk about her but his last interaction with her, for him, was only a few months ago. I know that he wants to go back to her. Apologize for disappearing again.” He stared at his brother’s sleeping form. “He’s done so much to keep me alive. I can’t take the chance of seeing the love of his life again from him.”
“Grace is good brother.”
He sighed. “I dunno about that. I- God, I want him to be able to go home but I don’t think I’d forgive myself if your people suffered because we turned around.” He smushed his hand into his cheek. “I’ve been trying to do the math. Four years to Erid. And even if we weren’t, ya know, catastrophically malnourished and were able to go straight home, it’s eight years to Earth.”
“Is too long.”
Ryland looked at the Eridian as he trilled mournfully. “Rocky have many more centuries with mate. Eridians live very long. Humans do not. Colt not have much time after going home.”
His chest tightened for a moment. Colt, dejected, staring at the ceiling, nearly catatonic after his memories of her had come back, was burned into Ryland’s memory, opening the valves of guilt and shame pooling in his stomach.
“He needs to go home,” Ryland decided, hands tightening in the fabric of his sweats.
But they promised to save both stars.
“I need to work on something in the lab, can you keep an eye on him until he wakes up?”
“Rocky will watch sleep.”
“Thanks pal.”
“I can reinduce the coma,” he whispered, staring down at the notebook in front of him. “I reinduce the coma, Armando takes care of his nutrition. I go to Erid and make sure that the Eridians can save their star, and Colt goes home.”
He stared at the ceiling. “He’s gonna kill me.”
“Me or Rocky?”
Ryland looked up, heart dropping into his stomach as he saw Colt leaning up against the aluminum wall panels and his arm moved to instinctively cover the notebook. “Uhhh, neither, hopefully.”
“You sounded pretty sure.”
“I always sound sure.”
Colt’s eyes drifted from his brother’s face to the notebook he hastily covered. He could see a bit of Ryland’s scribbled handwriting that was hardly legible. He used to write like that before deadlines a few minutes before class. He’s nervous.
His chest tightened. “Whatcha got there Rylie?”
“Nothing,” Ryland answered, too quickly.
He pushed off the wall, taking a step towards his brother as Ryland shot up, tucking the notebook behind his back. They stared at each other, a standoff–between two halves of one soul, both of them completely unreadable to the other.
“Ryland.”
“Colt.”
Silence.
“What’s in the notebook?”
“Nothing.”
“Liar.”
Ryland froze, hand tightening on the book. “Colt,” he began slowly. “You need to not freak out.”
“Oh, I’m definitely not freaking out about the fact that my brother is very cagey right now,” Colt challenged, taking another step forward as Ryland took a step back. “Not freaking out at all.”
“Colt-”
“What’s in the notebook, Ryland?”
“If I tell you, you-”
“Maybe let me decide that for myself?”
“I know you well enough.”
Silence. Deafening silence.
“You need to go home, Colt,” Ryland insisted, steeling himself as Colt raised an eyebrow. “That’s my number one priority.”
“Yeah, we’re going home together,” Colt said slowly. “We’re going home together, Ryland. We both need to go home.”
He didn’t answer.
“Ryland.”
“You need to go home.”
“We need to go home, Ryland. We are gonna do that together.” Colt took a step forward, voice shaking as he called out. “Ryland.”
He took a sharp inhale, looking down at the notebook before looking back up at his twin. “Armando,” he called, staring at Colt who looked at him suspiciously. “Hold him down.”
Colt’s eyes widened as the robotic arm descended from the ceiling, reaching for the back of his neck. He twisted away, but not before another one caught him, pinning the former stuntman against the lab table. “Ryland!” He yelped. “Ryland, what the hell are you doing?!”
He mumbled something as he walked away from his brother, taking something from another of the robot arms. “Colt, you need to go home. That’s nonnegotiable.”
“Yeah, I’m-” he tried to free himself, only for Armando to slam him back down on the table- “I’m not negotiating, Ry. What- what are you doing?”
“You’re going home, Colt,” he repeated as Colt caught a glimpse of a syringe in his brother’s hand.
“Why aren’t you saying we?”
“Because I need to make sure that we do what we promised. That we save Sol and Eridani.”
“Ryland,” Colt begged, still squirming. “Ryland, Ryland, what the hell do you have? What- what are you doing?”
“I,” he said slowly, “am going to Erid so in case Rocky passes on the journey, there’s still someone who knows what to do.” He rested his hand on the small of Colt’s back, right over his surgery scar. “You are gonna go home, and-”
“Ryland no,” he pleaded, voice nearly ravaged by a sob threatening to escape. “No. No, Ryland, please. Don’t- don’t do this. Don’t- don’t make me go back without you, please. Don’t leave me behind, don’t leave me.”
Ryland frowned, pulling his hand away and moving to steady Colt’s neck as Colt tried to reach back for him. “Colt, you have people waiting for you-”
“No, I don’t, Ryland, please. Please, please, don’t do this.” Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes as he felt the coolness of an alcohol swab on the back of his neck. “Don’t do this, Ryland. You- you can’t do this to me! I’m your brother! We’re supposed to do this together, Ryland, please, please, please.”
“I’m sorry, Colt.”
“No! No, Ryland, you- you can’t please, please, Ryland don’t- don’t-” he felt the pinch of a needle at the base of his neck, the sedative flooding through his veins, softening the noise inside his head, weighing down his arms. “Rylie,” he begged as his eyes grew heavy. “Don’t- don- leave…me…behind.”