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Halt O'Carrick liked mornings. Not mornings in itself, but the calmness that came with it, before the world started to wake up around him. He liked the feeling of being able to just lie in his bed as the sun rose and turned the world from night to day. It was at this time of day that he felt like he could let everything go. He could let his walls fall and allow himself to really think about everything and anything.
This morning he had memories on his mind. Memories of his family, his friends and how he met the man that was sleepning soundly beside him.
Halt looked at Crowley's peaceful face for a moment before his gaze fell on his right index finger and the tiny scar that could be seen on the fingertip. A scar that he had gotten as a promise ten years ago.
~~~~
(14 years old)
"Won't it hurt?" asked Ferris, a watchful eye on the knife, the piece of paper and the cloth that was lying on the table between them.
"Ofcourse it will hurt!" sighed Halt as he picked up the knife. "But remember thatit was you who wanted us to do this!"
"I know, but that was before I remembered that I'm afraid of blood!" Ferris responded, sounding almost desperate. Halt put the knife back on the table and took his twins hands in his, looking Ferris straight in the eyes.
"Ferris, we will just make a super tiny cut on the tip of our right index finger, drop three drops of blood on the paper, swear the oath and then we will be done and put a paiste* on it." Halt said, doing his best to calm the younger twin.
"Daidi* will be mad when he sees it!" mumbled Ferris quietly, the fear in his coffee brown eyes slowly fading at Halt's reasuring words.
"Don't worry, I'll take the blame. He won't belive us anyway if we say it was your idea and he's probably already looking for a reason to yell at me again." sighed Halt as he gave his brother's hands a gentle squeeze, before letting go of the left hand and reach for the knife again. He looked Ferris in the eye, silently asking if was ready and when his brother nodded, he carefully placed the knife to Ferris's skin and made a tiny cut. Blood broke through and they let three drops land on the paper before Halt picked up the cloth, ripped it in two, wrapped Ferris's finger with one of them and cleaned the knife before repeating the process on himself. He then picked up the paper with the blood on in his left hand, grabbed his twin's left hand and started their oath.
"I got your back. You got mine..."
"I'll help you out. Anytime..."
"To see you hurt, to see you cry..."
"Makes me weep, and wanna die..."
"And if we agree to never figth..."
"It wouldn't matter, who is wrong or right..."
"If a broken heart, needs a mend..."
"I'll be right there, till the end..."
"If your cheeks are wet, from drops of tears..."
"Don't worry, let go of your fears..."
"Hand in hand, love is sent..."
"We'll be brothers...Till the end!"
~~~~
Halt smiled at the memory, a smile that turned sad when he remembered how their father had reacted and how little he had seen of Ferris these past years since he moved from Ireland to UK. And Caitlyn, his sweet, charming and incredibly sly little sister.
~~~~
(15 years old)
Halt was just walking around at home, listening to instrumental music in his headphones, when he saw Caitlyn peek around a corner.
"What are you up to this time?" he asked, unconsciously using his "Big Brother Voice" as Cait and Ferris called it, and Caitlyn immediately spun around and gave him her most innocent smile.
"Nothing!" she responded, just a little bit too fast. Halt simply raised an eyebrow and looked at her. She could fool most people with her sweet and innocent looking smile and eyes but not Halt. She had tried many times and failed all of them. It almost made him belive that she was making mischief just to see if she could hide it from him.
"Why do I get the feeling tha..." before he could finish what he was saying, there was a surprised yelp from around the corner and Caitlyn started to giggle. She stoped immediately when their father came around said corner, angry eyes falling on his eldest and youngest children, locking on Halt.
"HALT O'CARRICK, CÉARD SA DIABHAL A CHEAPANN TÚ TÚ AG DÉANAMH?" he screamed and Halt felt his blood run cold.
"Ach athair..." Caitlyn tried to tell him that Halt hadn't done anything but he wouldn't listen and just told her to be quiet and go to her room.
As Halt saw her walk away he braced himself and could only hope that his father would keep it verbal this time. But it seemed like that wasn't his father's plan as he raised his hand. Halt didn't move, knowing that it would only make it worse, but he didn't react in anyother way either as the open hand struck him like it had done so many times before.
`As long as he stays away from them, I will take every stike he deals´
That evening, Halt spent almost two hours telling Caitlyn that it was fine, that it didnt really hurt, that it wasn't her fault while she was crying hysterically in his arms, apologizing for what their father had done to him because of what SHE had done. She may be a sly prankster but she never wanted anyone else to get the blame for her pranks. Especially not Halt, who already got yelled at almost everyday.
~~~~
His hand had gone to his cheek when he remembered how his father treated him. But it was okay. By taking the blame, he could make sure that Ferris and Caitlyn didnt have to go through the same thing. They where often mad at him for doing it but he didn't care. Their parents had always thought that it was Halt anyway and the abuse hadn't scared him or broken him down. It rather seemed like it had made him stronger and it ahd made him sure of one thing. He would do everything in his power to not become like his parents. It was after all they who made Halt decide to move to another country, one of the best decisions he have ever made.
He was 18 when he moved into his new apartment, not far from school. It was a very popular area for students to live in, due to the close distanse to the school and the cheap prices.
Halt had moved in a week after summer break started, meaning that most of the apartments stod empty as those who lived in them had left for the summer. That had given Halt the time to get used to his new surroundings and get to know some of the students that had stayed over the summer. He still felt amazed at how fast he had become friends with Berrigan, Rodney, Pauline and the other students in his apartment building. He had gotten to know them during the first week in his new home and as the summer had gone by, more and more of the students had returned and Halt had somehow just fit into that groupe of friends, like the last piece of a puzzle, and it had felt natural for all of them from the beginning.
But his most presious memory from that summer was when he met Crowley.
~~~~
(18 years old)
Music flowed through the air and all around Halt's apartment as he was making dinner to himself. It was a slow and calm tune, probably an instrumental version of some love song. Halt preferred to listen to instrumental songs, because the music wasn't being ruined by singing in them, and as he sat down to eat, a familar tune started. Before he knew it, he was singing the lyrics and letting his own, soft voice drift out through his open window.
"Tale as old as time
True as it can be
Barely even friends
Then somebody bends
Unexpectedly"
Just as he was about to sing the next part, a slightly deeper voice started to sing outside of his window. He rose up from the table to see who it was.
"Just a little change
Small to say the least"
Sandy red hair, hazel eyes and a happy smile met Halt's gaze as he looked out the window and the stranger continued.
"Both a little scared
Neither one prepared
Beauty and the beast"
~~~~
By that time, Halt already knew that he was attracted to both men and women. He wasn't bi or gay, he just didn't think that gender made any differens if the feelings were true.
Now, six years after their first meeting, five years after their first date and two years after moving in together, Halt just laid in their shared bed, remembering the past, as his, yes his, Crowley slowly woke up.
"Good morning my Clover." yawned Crowley and Halt rolled his eyes at the nickname, to pleased about life at the moment to complain.
"Mil maidin mhaith." Halt responded as Crowley's hand traced the hickeys that he had placed on Halt's throat the night before.
"I really have to learn more irish!" Crowley said quietly.
"To me, it's enough with `Is breá liom tú´ and `Is féidir liom´." Halt mumbled, making Crowley sincker as he placed a soft kiss on the golden ring he had given Halt the night before. The ring on the left ring finger.