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“What?”
The word came from Wenlang and Gao Tu simultaneously, both staring at the doctor with wide eyes. The doctor, a gentle old man, looked at them and blinked, as if confused by their confusion. “Twins”, he repeated, “I said congratulations, you’re pregnant with twins.”
The pair looked at each other, Wenlang offering a sheepish smile and Gao Tu pressing his face into his hands. “We have to start using protection”, he mumbled, and the alpha couldn’t help but flush the tiniest bit as he glanced at the doctor.
“Well, regarding that… I have some unfortunate news as well”, their doctor said delicately, the omega instantly snapping his eyes back to him. It was their first trimester ultra sound, after Gao Tu had produced one more clearly positive pregnancy test. They had, once again, discussed it privately, both of them agreeing that one more child would be okay. After that they would need to pay closer attention to protection, but even if that failed it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Twins, however…
“Due to your previous conditions, I take it you knew your ability to conceive wasn’t guaranteed?”
“Yes”, Gao Tu breathed, body full of nervous energy Wenlang tried to dissipate as much as he could, grabbing his hand and stroking the back of it gently. “Due to your high compatibility and the alpha pheromones your previous pregnancy miraculously manifested even with all the damage to your system”, the man spoke gently, “but it seems that your body is meeting its limit. Even more so with a twin pregnancy.”
“What does that mean for him?” Wenlang inquired full of worry, head trying to fill with terrible images of his mate not surviving labour and so forth.
“Well… It’s not an immediate cause of worry for you, but it does cause some extra measures. If you decide to carry this pregnancy to term, the amount of rest and care must be higher. There might be a need for you to stay in the hospital the closer you get to the due date, and in this case we strongly suggest a c-section.”
It was a lot of information to retain at once, but Wenlang was nothing if not a competent man, able to press the important details into his mind.
“In addition… After this pregnancy, your uterus will most likely not be able to sustain another pregnancy without causing severe risks to you”, the doctor then added, making both of them freeze. “This would have to be your final pregnancy, Mr. Gao.”
They hadn’t even noticed they’d held their breath, until they breathed deeply out in tandem, hand in hand, scents mingling together in an effort to soothe each other. “So what you’re saying is, that if I were to get pregnant again after this one, I would die?” his mate confirmed, voice exasperated and almost offended. The old man nodded solemnly, tilting his head. “The risk of that would be high, but not one hundred percent. High enough that we would recommend performing a hysterectomy during the operation.”
An exasperated and dry chuckle left Gao Tu’s mouth, and Wenlang could feel the anxiety and irritation rising inside him. “Thank you, doctor”, he said, allowing his mate to just stew in his feelings as they stood up. “We will think about our options, and schedule another appointment when we know how we will proceed.”
The doctor nodded, offering a sympathetic smile. “I will say that the probability of this pregnancy going well is high, so you don’t need to worry about it that much”, he said, “just weigh the facts and realities of it.”
Wenlang nodded for the both of them, grabbing both of their coats and following his mate out of the room. They didn’t exchange any words in the hallways of the hospital, but after they sat in his car Gao Tu breathed a heavy breath. ”Remind me to kill you later”, he muttered, eyes turned out the window, form curled into himself. It was clear there was something that was bothering him, and who would be surprised by that? He was basically given an ultimatum, and Wenlang knew his mate didn’t like that. Not to mention the fact that they had been quite frankly told that there couldn’t be any more babies, and if he was honest, he was sad about that too. Even if he didn’t want to subject his omega to any extra pain or heartbreak, he still dreamed of having baby after baby with him. It was mostly the alpha instincts talking, but he also genuinely loved having a family with Gao Tu. He loved having children with their features, learning to know their quirks and own little characteristics, just being a father.
”I will”, he just mused, driving them back home without forcing the omega to hold his hand in the car.
It was quiet in the car, Gao Tu just chewing his lip in silence and staring out the window, walking like a zombie when they got out of the car. Wenlang worried, but still he did not pry - not yet.
He only watched as his mate walked straight to their bedroom and closed the door behind him, and he couldn’t help but sigh. ”Daddy”, his firstborn called out, padding into the entry way with his notepad in his arms. ”Where’s baba?”
”Baba’s taking a little rest”, he assured, giving Lele a smile. ”Don’t worry.”
Lele was almost nine, such a big boy already, face filled with adultlike worry and apprehension. ”Come here”, Wenlang asked, opening his arms to his son, welcoming him to his embrace when Lele nearly ran at him. ”Did you and Tian Xi have fun with uncle Yong?”
”Yes, we drew a lot”, Lele said with a smile, just as Hua Yong walked from the living room with a wriggling Tian Xi in his arms. It was an unusual sight, Hua Yong being the less affectionate one towards other kids, but not an unwelcome sight. ”Your daughter is quite skilled in speech”, the enigma hummed, ”and Lele has certainly gotten very good at drawing.”
”They are my kids, after all.”
”Don’t flatter yourself, Wenlang”, Hua Yong chuckled, putting his daughter down and watching as she ran to him as well. The alpha easily lifted his daughter up as well, holding both on his arms with ease.
”Well? Any news?” His eccentric friend asked after a while, leaning on the foyer wall with a raised eyebrow. Wenlang hesitated, turning towards his kids. ”Kids, how about you go pick a book for us to read later, while I chat with uncle Yong?”
Luckily his kids were happy to oblige, although he suspected that Lele was starting to be old enough to understand the nuances of adult conversations. ”That bad, huh”, Hua Yong hummed after the kids had left. ”Well… It’s not very good, at least”, he said, rubbing his neck in hesitation. ”First of all it’s twins”, the alpha decided to start, glaring a little at the amusement on his friend’s face. ”What a dog you are”, Hua Yong laughed, ”one would think you would’ve learned.”
”Yeah, yeah, speak for yourself, you lunatic”, Wenlang mumbled, shoving his hands into his pockets. ”… If Gao Tu carries the twins to term, it’s going to have to be the last time”, he said quietly, ”there’s… Damage. Risks after that.”
For once the enigma didn’t joke, only looked at him solemnly and understandingly. ”I take it he isn’t fond of not being able to decide for himself”, he pondered, Wenlang only nodding as a reply. He was saddened as well, but the true grief was Gao Tu’s. He could only try to help carry it. ”He might want to talk with my Mr. Sheng”, his friend then said, ”the situation is different, but he knows the pain of not being able to choose for himself.”
Wenlang remembered the scare the other couple had during their pregnancy, the way Hua Yong had asked for him to take care of little Peanut if Sheng Shaoyou didn’t make it - for if he died, Hua Yong would die as well. Back then it hadn’t made sense, but the more he loved Gao Tu, the more he understood not being able to live without him. Luckily the other couple had not been put into that situation, but having other children was out of the question for them.
”Maybe”, he hummed, ”I’ll ask when the time is right.”
His friend didn’t really offer any words or actions of reassurance, but somehow his calm demeanor and the knowledge of something similar happening to them did make the alpha feel at least a little better.
”Well, the kids were well behaved”, the enigma then stated, putting on his shoes and preparing to leave. ”I suspect your daughter will be an alpha when she grows up.”
”How so?”
”Just call it intuition. She’s stubborn like you, very strong for her age.”
Wenlang managed a light chuckle, thanking the other man for his services and watching him leave. He had been apprehensive of having just Hua Yong babysit without his alpha, but in the end it had been for nothing. After all, the enigma was a father like him, and their strange friendship had blossomed slowly to something akin to companionship.
He let his mate have his privacy for a while, feeding and entertaining the kids until Lele was content drawing by himself and Tian Xi was due for a nap in her nursery. This time she went down easy, letting him slip out of the room and to their quiet, dark bedroom. His eyes immediately found his mate’s form on the bed, lying on his side and staring at the wall in front of him. Gently he walked to the bed, sat next to his mate and laid his hand softly on his back. ”Baobei”, he whispered, not receiving an answer. ”Do you want to talk about it?” He tried again, keeping his voice soft and quietly letting out some of his calming iris.
”I don’t know what there is to talk about”, Gao Tu mumbled, voice tight and upset. ”We’re going to have twins, I’m going to get even bigger, and after that we can no longer have kids. How wonderful.”
”My love”, Wenlang cooed, settling on his side next to his mate, chest pressed against his back. ”We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. You have all the right to not want to carry them.”
”I don’t want to get rid of them”, the omega grieved, ”they’re yours, I want them, but…”
The alpha waited patiently, just stroking his mate’s arm gently.
”… It’s taking me longer and longer to find myself again after being pregnant”, Gao Tu mumbled, ”my body doesn’t feel like my own, and I just feel… I don’t know, like I’m not me.”
Wenlang felt his heart constrict out of sympathy. He had never heard his mate talk about these kinds of thoughts, and instinctively he hugged him a bit tighter. ”What do you mean?” He asked with a soft, comforting voice, trying his best to soothe and protect.
”… For my whole life I’ve been told that good omegas make a lot of babies and are happy about it”, his mate mumbled. ”I wasn’t an omega for the most part of my life, and… I probably would’ve stayed a beta, if I hadn’t gotten pregnant. I probably would’ve continued suppressing, until…”
The omega didn’t finish that thought, but Wenlang knew where it went, and he didn’t like it.
”But after Lele I liked being an omega, at least a little”, he admitted, ”and after you, I… Was proud of it. Of being your omega, of making you babies that looked like you.”
If the time would’ve been different, the alpha would have preened at that. He wanted to kiss and hug, to smooth over every crease on Gao Tu’s brow, to make him smile again. But he needed to be patient.
”And now they’re telling me that after this one I can’t do it anymore”, Gao Tu choked a sob. ”It makes me feel… It makes me feel like I’m not good enough. Like I’m… Broken.”
”My love”, Wenlang whispered, turning his mate around in his arms and embracing him tighter, warm tears dropping quietly on his chest. ”Being an omega is not all you are, please tell me you know that”, he assured, stroking Gao Tu’s back soothingly. ”You are an omega, yes, but you’re also a father, a loyal and loving mate, a capable secretary… And so much more. You’re a brother, a friend, an all in all good person - so much more than just an omega able to give birth.”
He heard his omega sniffle quietly. ”My love, I would never see you as just an incubator”, he murmured, kissing the top of his mate’s head. ”And I wouldn’t expect you to have a pregnancy that made you feel like you lost yourself. You don’t have to keep them, I wouldn’t mind.”
There was a part of him that whined at the thought of terminating the pregnancy, but that part he quietened quickly. They weren’t even babies yet, and there wasn’t anything to lose yet. He knew that, and he would always choose Gao Tu first.
The omega wiped his wet eyes, looking up at him with those sad, soft pools of liquid brown. ”I mean it when I say I don’t want to get rid of them”, he murmured, voice still thick from tears. ”I just… I don’t know how we’ll make it with two babies, a toddler and a son who will probably start showing signs of puberty soon.”
”Maybe this time you’ll let me hire a nanny service”, Wenlang suggested, ”and let me stay with you more often. It’s not a burden, it won’t do any harm, it’s what I want to do. Okay?”
His mate looked hesitant, biting his lip and pondering every word. ”… I’ll think about it”, he eventually agreed, ever the independent and capable omega he was. ”But… We’re keeping the twins. Even if I’m going to be so huge and unsexy with two kids in my stomach…”
”Nonsense”, Wenlang cooed, nuzzling his neck and scenting him. ”You’ll always be sexy to me. I will never stop wanting you.”
”You wanting me is the reason we are in this mess.”
”Actually, if I recall correctly, it was you who wanted me to pound you into the mattress.”
”And you didn’t resist. Your fault, and I’ll beat you for it later.”
Wenlang laughed a hearty, unrestrained laugh.