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Lying in a coffin, pretending to be dead, was turning out to be surprisingly difficult. The padding under his body was thick and comfortable, even if the white satin lining wouldn’t have been his first choice. Nate finally had to settle into something resembling a light trance in order to keep from falling asleep for real. Around him swirled the noise and activity of a funeral getting ready to start. He had to maintain character through the initial rush of Father Paul’s prayers and homilies…
…and then the fun would really start.
The others were professionals. He wasn’t questioning that. He would never question that. But they were human, and they were family, and there were times in his history with them when the words “controlling bastard” were the nicest things anyone could say about his behavior. Every face in the room had lit up at the idea of being able to eulogize him, and Sophie – damn her – had pointed out that anything less than all four of them having a proper go at him would look strange.
“We have to make it believable.”
And he couldn’t say a word in his own defense.
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Parker looked out over the assembled crowd, and tried to remember the public speaking techniques Sophie had reviewed with her that morning. “I don’t understand things like most people,” she began slowly, still trying to sort the words out in her head. “I never have.”
She thought about Nate lying a few feet away, and how she would feel if this wasn’t an act, if Nate was really dead. “Nate was the second person I ever met who didn’t think I was stupid. I mean, he might have at first, but he was also super drunk all the time, so I think even he would say that didn’t count.”
Parker squeezed the edges of the podium and tried to ignore the aching, fluttering feeling just below her sternum. “Nate cared what I thought about things. He always listened, and he never looked at me the way other people do sometimes…I mean, did. Do.”
No good – she was starting to lose track of what was real and what was a con. “I always liked watching him do puzzles. He never started with the borders like most people. He told me the challenge was going straight to the heart of the problem and working out from there.”
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“I was a kid when I went to work for Nate.” Hardison looked out over the sea of faces and tried to forget how shaken Parker had been by her speech. “He always knew the right way to keep me focused, and I’ve never known anyone to believe in me the way he always seemed to – not anyone since my Nana.”
Death was something Hardison had never had to grapple with – not really. His particular brand of crime had always been the most sterile of the four of them, rarely requiring him to venture beyond the protection of his computer screens. Until hooking up with the others, he’d also never had anyone beyond Nana that he cared enough to fight for, let alone with.
“Nate showed me that I could do real good in this world,” he went on. “That I could use what I knew to help people, and that there were people worth helping out there.”
They’d talked about trolling Nate – at least a little bit. The opportunity was almost too good to pass up. But now that he was here, in the moment, Hardison couldn’t think past the idea that someday he would have to do this for real.
And he wasn’t sure anymore that he would be able to handle it.
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Dammit, Hardison!
And Parker too, although Eliot was forced to admit, at least to himself, that he hadn’t expected the thief to follow the plan.
Out of all of them, Eliot was pretty sure he was the one least looking forward to examining his feelings about their mastermind. “How do you say that for the first time in decades somebody looked at you and saw a person worth saving?” He sighed. “It sounds ridiculous, but I don’t know any better way to say it.”
“I was lost in some very dark places when Nate Ford came into my life. I would later come to find that even before we became partners, and ultimately – I hope – friends, he was looking after me. Circumstances I never should have survived, I learned later that I did because he intervened, because he saw something in me that was worth saving, worth believing in.”
Dammit, he was starting to ramble too. Clenching his jaw, he managed not to glare at Parker and Hardison, who were huddled together now at the edge of the crowd. “Nate could look at anybody and see the truth of them. It was one of his best…and worst…traits. Knowing that he really saw me, and that whatever he saw brought him closer instead of sending him running for the hills, well…”
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Sophie reached out and trailed her fingers down the curve of Nate’s cheek as she passed the coffin; partly to rattle him, but also to ground herself in the truth of his circumstances. The man who knew her best of anyone in the world, and loved her anyway – he was still alive. This was no different than any other grift.
“Eliot spoke of how profoundly it could affect you when somebody like Nate uncovered the truth of you and saw somebody worth saving.” She paused, favoring the hitter with an understanding smile. “I know that feeling all too well. I think a lot of us do.”
“Nate was a complicated man – always looking for the good in life, no matter how often that same life showed him evil. When he did find evil though, he fought it with every breath he had – believing until the end that good would prevail.”
Sophie smiled, ducking her head. “I think I fell in love with the idea of Nate Ford within the first year we knew each other. He was the ultimate forbidden fruit – handsome, charming, intelligent – and so very hard to resist.” She risked a glance at the casket. “It wasn’t until we stopped running that I learned what it meant to be loved by a man like that. It changed my life.”
She didn’t have to pretend to dash away the tears that were gathering in her eyes. “I will always be grateful to him for that.”
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By the time Sophie finished, Nate was wishing the team had gone with Plan A. Hearing all his faults and foibles laid out for all to hear would have been much easier to take than lying here listening to how much each member of the team thought of him and unable to respond.
I’m not worth it. They talked so much about truth, but that was the one great truth of his life that he was never going to be able to outrun.
Nate’s heart rate jumped as he sensed somebody approaching the casket. A moment later, as he tried his best to remain still, a man’s calloused fingertip traced the line of his cheek – catching a tear he hadn’t even realized he’d wept.
“Imagine that,” Paul said, his voice barely louder than a whisper. “God’s doling out miracles after all.”