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Pidge was anxious. Every day she would wake up (if she had even slept) and wonder where her family was. Every time she'd go over all the information she had seared into her brain on the Galra and where they kept their prisoners. Every moment she’d feel just a little less hope.
Pidge got out of bed and padded down towards her “workshop” in the castle, laptop tucked under her arm. She’d been awake for about an hour, trying to convince herself that she needed sleep, that she wouldn’t get any new information about the Galra now she couldn’t get later. There never was new information anyway. But she couldn’t just lay in bed anymore, so up she got.
On a whim, though, she decided to try and see if she could get to the workshop a different way. When Sendak had taken control of the castle and she’d had to avoid getting caught, Pide had found that sometimes you could get to the same place many various ways. It was like taking a back road versus driving on the highway: it might take you longer to reach your destination, but it was a lot more peaceful and less trafficked. The passageways really helped when she wanted to avoid all the other people on the ship.
As she walked, Pidge slowly realized that she was getting close to where they had kept Sendak on ice before Shiro had forcibly ejected him into space. It wasn’t a particularly bad place, but it always made her skin crawl with the memory of the still Galra soldier who nearly got her killed.
Deciding it was too early to deal with all of that, Pidge was about to turn and take her usual route when she heard a noise from that room. She wasn’t sure what it was, and thought it possibly one of the castle systems. She took a peek in and stopped right in her tracks. Shiro stood by an empty tube, and he didn’t look good at all. His hands were clamped over his ears, and his eyes were shut tight, as if trying to keep out unwelcome sights and sounds, and his breathing came in erratic bursts. Pidge knew immediately what was happening and knew he needed to be brought back.
“Shiro?” she called, stepping into the room, “Hey, Shiro?”
The black paladin wasn’t responding.
Pidge took a deep breath and moved closer to him, taking care to stay out of range of his metal arm, “Shiro?”
Something about her tone must’ve startled him, because Shiro whirled around to face her, his eyes wild.
“Oh, Pidge,” Shiro sighed as he registered it was a friend and no foe standing before him, “It’s just you. What’re you doing up so early?”
‘I could ask you the same,’ Pidge thought, looking over the ragged-looking man, but she just shrugged, “I don’t sleep much.”
Shiro turned slightly away, “That sounds nice,” he muttered almost wistfully.
Pidge adjusted her glasses, trying to decide whether or not to ask her next question, “Are you okay?”
He took a deep breath, and Pidge realized how dumb a question that was. No , Shiro was not okay .
“Are you having the nightmares again?”
He looked surprised, “How—”
“Please,” she scoffed, “There are only 7 of us on this entire ship, Shiro. No secrets can be kept for long.” Pidge didn’t add that she had been having her fair amount of restless nights as well, “Want to talk about it?”
The black paladin shook his head, but they both knew she was right, so he told her. As he explained, Pidge saw how much almost losing Allura wounded Shiro, and how desperate he was to keep her safe. He started to get agitated.
“Shiro, you can’t keep beating yourself up for her getting taken; we got her back, didn’t we?” Pidge tried to calm him down.
But Shiro only became more agitated, and as he kept talking she could tell this was only making matters worse.
“Shiro, stop!” she reached out and grabbed his left hand, squeezing it to bring him back to reality. She hated this; seeing Shiro so damaged. She’d always thought of him as her strong, compassionate leader, and it threw her out of sorts to see him so fragile. “It’s okay, we’re safe. Allura’s safe and asleep here in the castle. Everything’s okay.”
Shiro took deep breaths, and slowly his eyes focused back into the comforting and resilient man she knew.
“Thanks, Pidge.”
The green paladin grinned and released his hand with a final squeeze. She felt her stomach growl almost as loud as Hunk’s, and it looked like Shiro could use a pick-me-up as well. “I’m going to go get some goo for breakfast; you’re welcome to join if you’d like.”
Pidge spun on her heel and left the room, knowing he’d follow her eventually.
***
After her breakfast of space goo and some of the Altean “Nectar”, Pidge went down to her workshop and began running diagnostics on a few new programs she was developing.
Within the hour Hunk came lumbering in to do his usual maintenance on Yellow and to check on all the other Lions. It always kinda creeped Pidge out how much the Lions responded to Hunk’s babbling as he tinkered with them, but she never said anything because every time he did they were able to form Voltron more easily than before. Plus, she felt a little guilty for not putting as much time into her Lion as the others did, so any attention Green got helped.
Surprisingly, though, Hunk simply greeted the Lions and then turned to Pidge, peering over her shoulder at her screen.
“Hunk, if you touch my stuff I will not hesitate to taze you.” Even though she couldn’t see him, she could sense Hunk’s fingers creeping towards her new gear.
The paladin pouted “But you have new gadgets! You can’t expect me, an engineer, to ignore new tech if it’s right in front of me!”
Pidge sighed, “I’m not keeping them from you forever, I just wanted to make sure they were ready for adjustments before you came and tinkered with them. You’re usually working with the Lions while I do this part.”
“Oh, that would explain it,” he sat up and rubbed his chin, “I mean, I was up with Lance late, and I fixed the Lions while he talked.”
Usually Pidge would just nod and keep working after a comment like that, but the memory of Shiro’s wild eyes made her stop. “Is he okay? He’s not having nightmares or anything, right?”
Hunk waved her worry away, “Nah, he’s just homesick and needs to vent sometimes. He and I were friends before we went to the Garrison, so he and I talk about our families a lot.”
A small fist grabbed at Pidge’s gut. She knew what it was like to miss family, “Yeah, I get that.”
She must’ve made a face, because Hunk instantly changed tone, “Hey, you okay?”
Pidge sighed again and removed her glasses, rubbing the bridge of her nose, “It’s not a big deal, but…” she trailed off and turned to the big yellow paladin. Even though his face was a bit fuzzy she could see he looked concerned, “Every day we’re out here fighting Zarkon and defending the universe is another day my family is in captivity by him. I have no idea where they are, or if they’re even still alive out there. For all I know, Haggar and her Druids could’ve made them into one of those monsters Voltron has destroyed, or they could be tortured trying to find out how Shiro escaped, or—”
“Pidge,” Hunk’s deep voice cut through her fears and grounded her, “If your dad and brother are like what Shiro has said or anything like you, I can almost guarantee they’re fine.”
She tried to meet his eyes but found her vision was watery, “I really hope you’re right.”
Hunk grinned, his teeth white and blinding against his dark skin. “Well, just like I told Lance, all we can do at this point is hope and work towards our goals. Though, I was referring to his crush on Keith, but—”
“Wait, he actually admitted to that?” Pidge interrupted, glad for a change in subject.
“Yeah,” he giggled, “he came bursting in the kitchen, like, 3 days ago practically screaming.”
“Oh my gosh,” she could just imagine it, “Is that why he’s been extra obnoxious around the new aliens we meet? He’s trying to make Keith jealous?”
“Yeah, and it’s working like a charm.”
“Don’t tell Lance that,” Pidge put her glasses back on and turned to her laptop, “It’ll only inflate his ego.”
“Oh no I tried; he’s denser that a neutron star.”
Pidge couldn’t help but laugh at that. While they were awful, she appreciated Hunk’s science puns and jokes, if for no other satisfaction that she was the only one who could understand them without a 15-minute explanation. It reminded her of how she and Matt would joke and tease at home and their mom would have to force them to stop.
She suddenly understood why Lance liked to talk to Hunk when he was homesick so much: having Hunk around was like a piece of home, no matter where you come from or what your family was like.
She smiled at the yellow paladin, “Thanks, Hunk.”
He smiled back, seeming to understand, “Anytime.”
***
Though it wasn’t for a very long time until Pidge was reunited with her family, she found her anxieties lessen over time, and she credited that to her Voltron family being there for her any time she needed them. Hunk especially was a great listener, and Shiro constantly reminded her how strong she was and could be.
She also made a mental note to thank Lance because she knew that if he hadn’t been hell-bent on making her a part of his and Hunk’s little group back at the Garrison, she’d never have been able to find her family.
She’d never say that to his face, of course.
That would defeat the purpose entirely.
