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In the rearview mirror, Tanaka saw the moment Yoshiki finally fell into a well-deserved sleep, slumping further into Natsuki until his head was fully pressed into his shoulder. Despite all his fighting to stay awake, his eyes finally fluttered shut and stayed that way.
Natsuki peered down to see what had happened, and upon noticing that Yoshiki had fallen asleep, promptly shifted to find a comfortable angle, rested his head upon Yoshiki’s, and closed his eyes as though seeing the other sleep was a command to do the same.
On the seat in the narrow space between them, their pinky fingers were still interlocked. They laid against one another on their unmarred sides, with their scarred and marked flesh wrapped around the outside, like ‘Hikaru’’s insides were surrounding them, protecting them still, allowing them to meet safely in the middle.
When Tanaka found them, it was because of Natsuki’s shouts for help. Yoshiki was weak but intact, globs of ‘Hikaru’’s insides filling in the gaps where his body was broken or destroyed. The matter was writhing slowly, lethargically, over both of their injuries at a fraction of the speed it’d moved at when he'd previously cut ‘Hikaru’’s head off.
“I gave it to ‘im!” Natsuki was breathless and insistent. “My other half, he’s got it, so he’ll be alright, won’t he?”
“Can you walk?”
Natsuki nodded quickly.
As gently as he could manage, Tanaka took Yoshiki in his arms despite Natsuki’s protesting. He still had one hand on Yoshiki’s cheek.
“I can help with carryin’--”
“Just focus on walking. Come on.”
In the safety of the car, Yoshiki was still in and out of it, still healing from something life-ending. By that point, Natsuki was certain he would be okay, because he could feel it himself, the way Yoshiki’s fractured body was being webbed back together the way his own could. His hand nervously skittered over the surface of Yoshiki’s left arm even as he looked elsewhere, either out the window or meeting Tanaka’s eyes in the rearview.
“Where are we going?” He asked, somehow still sounding like a bratty kid despite the circumstances.
Tanaka chuckled. “I’m… not sure,” he answered honestly. The company still had bad actors. A great deal of them. There would be people in their corner, but he couldn’t yet say who. “Got any ideas?”
They stopped at a service station just shy of an hour out for fuel and much-needed essentials: food, fresh clothing, coin-operated showers. Tanaka ran inside to buy something to dress the boys in before they went for the showers, given that both of their school uniforms were drenched with dirt, grime, and blood. Yoshiki’s was torn in the middle from where he’d been impaled, pantleg missing from where his leg was missing mere hours before. The clothes on sale weren’t great, but he’d seen them dress in the same sort of thing back in Kubitachi. Oversized tourist-y t-shirts and shorts to go with their sneakers that they’d have to attempt to scrub the mud off of in the showers.
When he returned to the van, they were both laughing. About what, Tanaka wasn’t sure. It made him happy, though, to see that they managed to smile and joke and laugh nearly the entire drive over. He knew all of his decisions, and all of theirs, were the right ones. No other outcome would let them laugh together like this, or let him be around to hear it carry on like a hopeful tune.
Muffled by the car door, he could hear Yoshiki say an exaggerated, “don’t leave me all alone, Yoshiki,” and Natsuki yipped a “hey!” before trying to shove Yoshiki’s shoulder while he doubled over in laughter, arms crossed over his center. Tanaka was smiling when he knocked on the glass.
Scrubbed clean, in fresh clothes, fed and watered and back on the road, Natsuki took up asking “when will we get there?” and “are we there yet?” every few minutes like an irritating child. But it was his first time travelling this far, and he deserved to be excited, and curious, without being scolded for it.
Whenever he asked, Yoshiki would nudge him, or mess up his hair, or glare at him half-heartedly, telling him, “just be patient, will ya? Ya sound just like Kaoru when we’re headin’ to see my relatives.”
The air in the van seemed to still around those words. Something flickered across Yoshiki’s face, a moment of realization, before he turned his gaze back onto Natsuki and was able to smile again. Natsuki squirmed awkwardly, mouth twisted in a sort of frown. He knew what Yoshiki had lost for them to be together.
“It’ll be another fifty minutes, at least.” Tanaka answered, both to ease the discomfort radiating from the backseat and to address Natsuki’s curiosity.
Before long, they were both asleep in the rearview mirror. He considered heading straight for a hotel and leaving the ultimate destination for the next morning, given everything they’d all been through. The boys deserved to sleep more, and he was exhausted himself, but still. It was the only thing Natsuki could think to ask for. After a lifetime of granting wishes, he deserved to have one of his own fulfilled. So, he shook them awake with an arm extended back around his seat.
“Get up, you two. We’re here.”
Like a cat waking from a midday nap, Natsuki raised his head ever so slightly and stretched his arms and legs out a bit before he finally got his eyes open. He looked down at their hands, still overlapping at the pinky, then at the boy still resting his head on his shoulder. Avoiding jostling him with that same shoulder, Natsuki’s other arm came around to grip Yoshiki’s arm, gently shaking him awake. He knew he was fine, since a part of himself was what healed Yoshiki in the first place, but he was still cautious. At some point, he’d started treating Yoshiki like he was delicate, but now that he’d seen exactly what it would look like for Yoshiki to be hurt to a point of no return, it was clear he feared seeing harm coming to him that much more. Before, he lacked the ability to fully understand it, how scary the weakness of a human body can be. Now, he could. It was visible in the minor curve of his frown when Yoshiki didn’t wake at first, in the way his hand shifted to lay over more than just one of his fingers, grasping.
Yoshiki’s eyes fluttered open, and then he sat up with a start, head turning this way and that. He looked out of the van window at the city, then at Tanaka, then finally turned to Natsuki, confusion dissipated.
“We’re here!” Natsuki chirped.
“Ah, alright,” Yoshiki said as he extracted his hand from under Natsuki’s and unfastened his seatbelt, which had already been pulled so far over so that they could lay against each other that the thing was practically rendered useless for the final stretch of the drive.
Tanaka faced forward, sighed through his nose, shifted in his seat a bit. “You two go on ahead,” he said eventually, “I’ll be in in a minute.” So he could make sure they were okay, and more importantly, pay for all of the shit they were no doubt going to grab.
“‘Kay!”
Natsuki unbuckled himself and shuffled to Yoshiki’s side so they could both tumble out of the same door.
Out on the sidewalk, Yoshiki stopped stock-still outside of the van door, staring down the busy road, gazing up at skyscrapers so tall he had to tilt his head all the way back to see where they stopped.
“Woah…” Natsuki followed suit, taking in the city. He’d never seen anything like it, not even close. And even though Yoshiki hadn’t yet been to the city either, he tore his gaze away from the skyline to look at Natsuki, observing his wonderment like it was the more important view.
Their eyes met once again. Natsuki’s smile was blinding.
“Thank you, Yoshiki. For comin’ here with me.”
Yoshiki’s scarred hand reached for Natsuki’s. He nudged the van door shut, then pulled Natsuki along by their interlocked hands.
“I said we’d go when it was all over. I meant it, ‘cause I love ya.”
Natsuki laughed sharply, but it was choked up, like he was close to crying at the same time. He followed Yoshiki into the storefront, and despite the noise and the sweet, heavy smell of freshly baked breads and cakes in the air, all he could focus on was the weight of Yoshiki’s hand in his.
“I love ya, too.”