Chapter Text
Jisung woke up slightly sore but incredibly happy.
Before he fell asleep, the last thing he saw was Felix smiling at him. How long had it been since he could do that? Felix had always come to his room during the night, and they giggled like school girls until the sun came up as they sat on the bed, snacking on brownies Felix made. For the first time in months, Felix laughed with him, with them, and Jisung had never felt better.
Feeling slightly thirsty, he sat up, and he noticed Minho lying next to him. The room Ateez prepared for them had a large bed, and they had all piled onto it like they were at a sleepover. At one point Minho must’ve rolled close to him. He looked down at Minho’s long lashes, casting shadows under his eyes. He looked so peaceful like this, unlike his usual intimidating, emotionless scowl or his sarcastic, cocky smirks. His hand lay on his side, right before what would be Jisung’s back. Jisung smiled at him as he stepped off the bed and onto the cold floor. He winced at the coolness and scrambled for his boots. Once they were on, he padded soundlessly across the room and out the door. They were on the second floor, and honestly Jisung didn’t remember anything about directions from last night. Well, it wouldn’t hurt to do a little exploring. He decided to walk down the hall, which were dark as night. His eyes were still accustomed to the dark, and he saw a corner at the end. He turned accordingly, and he saw the stairs a few steps forward by his left. Another hall extended down the other end.
No one told them they couldn’t spy a little.
He slowly treaded to the other hall, and this time he saw some things on the walls. It was a little too dark to make out what it was, but he could vaguely see they were framed pictures. He passed by a door that was ornately decorated, with a simple wood-carved mountain ornament hanging from the hook. Human voices seemed to come from beyond the door. Then, it morphed into something less voice-like, more primal. Jisung frowned as he contemplated reaching for the fancy baroque door handle.
“I wouldn’t do it if I were you.” He nearly snapped his neck spinning around. A man was standing a few steps away from him, holding a candle. His face was familiar from yesterday. He searched through his mind for the fragment of memory he needed and… aha.
“Jongho… was it?” Even half hidden, he could see the man’s eyes were black. He was the human that Minho fought with. “How- ”
“When you live with five vampires, you learn to be discreet.” Jongho’s brows rose for a second. “Oh, no. Six now.” Jisung took a step back as he walked forward, his arms leaving his chest and going into the pockets on his suit trousers. “And you are…”
“Jisung.” Jongho nodded and bowed slightly. “Apologies. Yesterday was a bit hectic.”
“Understatement of the month.” Jisung watched as Jongho beckoned him with a hand. “Um…”
“You’re looking for Felix, right? I’ll take you to him.” It wasn’t exactly what he had in mind initially, but it was way better than the actual reason why he was walking around. Unable to resist, he tried to crack a joke at the man, who looked way too rigid for his liking.
“Will there be coffee?” It was a half-joke, but Jongho cracked a small smile.
“Yes. Now let’s go.” He turned, and Jisung trotted after him. They walked down the corridor, and as they took every few steps, Jongho lit another candle in the candleholder on the wall. Apparently, vampires needed no lights, and the candles were for Jongho’s benefit only. Jisung glanced at the wall, and with a start, he recognized the figures in the pictures on the wall. There was the scary looking vampire in a regal, double breasted coat as he sat by the window, a surprised yet adoring look on his face. In another, the vampire was ruffling the hair of some taller than him, and the camera captured him mid protest, his arms flailing. Beside it, a vampire he couldn’t quite remember the name of tackled San to the ground, locking their lips in a kiss. They were both in extremely fancy clothes, but neither seemed to care even if they got soiled on the floor. The tall vampire was there again on another picture, with Yunho, the other human. Yunho was gushing over some fabric for some reason, and the tall vampire had one brow raised, seemingly confused as to what the fuss about. Even so, Jisung did not miss how close to each other they were sitting. One picture was larger than the rest, and it featured the entire group posing in front of front door, and in the center was…
“Is that you?” Jongho stopped, and Jisung pointed at the picture. “The one with everyone?” The man followed his finger, and his eyes softened when he saw what was at the end.
“Yes.” His voice was so tender he didn’t even sound like the same person. “My first day as a member of the coven.” They fell silent, and Jisung looked even more closely at the picture. The two taller members were standing in the back, one smiling with a V sign and the other putting up a V sign with a resigned look on his face as he glanced at the man beside him. San and his lover were in front of them, arms thrown over each other’s shoulders. The scary vampire stood beside them, smiling serenely. Beside Jongho stood the leader, Hongjoong, with a hand on his shoulder. On the other side was a vampire with a doll-like face. Jisung couldn’t quite remember what his name was either, but he scarcely remembered him standing beside Jongho yesterday night, blood all over his shirt and his light blond hair. In the picture he had both hands on Jongho’s shoulder, a gentle smile on his face. Jisung scanned the wall, and he spotted Jongho again, this time sparring with San’s lover. In the background, he saw the doll-like vampire, watching them with fondness in his eyes.
Jisung felt warmth build in his chest as he scrutinized each frame. This coven felt so incredibly close to each other, like a happy family. Even through the fragments it threatened to burst through the frame, their lively energy evident in every moment. He continued looking, and his mouth dropped open at a picture, clearly new, hanging at the edge.
In the picture, San and his lover were dragging a person with them. Jisung’s heart clenched when he recognized the figure with shoulder length blond hair.
It was Felix, his best friend, looking bewildered but happy. Whoever took the picture captured him mid step as the vampires pulled him forward by the arm, clearly excited to do something with him. Jisung remembered that look on Felix’s face: it was the same one he had when he and Hyunjin took him to the department store after Changbin told him he wanted to have dinner with him after the mission that would happen the next day.
That outfit they picked was still in a box in Jisung’s room, hidden away in his closet.
So this is where you were. Jisung thought to himself sadly. Even though Felix laughed with them last night, he still sat a bit away from them. Jisung couldn’t help but wonder if Felix was distancing himself away from them. Did he no longer feel like he was part of them? He followed Jongho down the stairs and down another hall, where he found himself in a dining room. The doll-like vampire sat at the table, and he smiled softly as Jongho entered. The man smiled back just as softly, if not even softer. Beside him sat Felix, smiling as wide as he had the night before.
“Lixie!”
“Sungie!” Jisung immediately rushed over, arms wide, but to his confusion, Felix hugged him almost awkwardly, mostly arms and no actual body contact. It slightly bothered him, but he still smiled back and sat next to his friend. Across from them, Jongho sat down next to the vampire, who had a single empty glass in front of him. Felix also had one by his hand, just as empty. Had Jisung been a little more awake, he might’ve figured it out much earlier what had been in them, but unfortunately, he was not. Felix turned to him and cocked his head.
“Do you want coffee? You always want coffee in the morning.” Jisung shrugged. Coffee wasn’t something he needed badly at the moment, possibly because the past twenty-four hours had been so chaotic his routine had been in shambles. On that thought, coffee might be the best way to get it back.
“Coffee sounds amazing right now.” Felix began to stand up, but before he could go anywhere, Jongho had already got up and started walking toward the kitchen.
“I’ll get the drinks, Felix hyung.” He called over his shoulder. “And another glass for you and Yeosang hyung.” Felix sat back down, and for a second, he looked slightly worried, but his smile came back just as quickly.
“Thank you, Jongho.” The doll-like vampire, Yeosang, whose name was finally revealed to him, finally spoke. His voice was lower than he expected, like how Felix’s voice was nothing like his face. In fact, now that he could look a little closer, he looked very similar to Felix with his shoulder length blond hair and pretty eyes. As Jongho disappeared into the kitchen, two other Ateez members entered. It was Hongjoong and the scary looking vampire. Felix’s eyes lit up when he saw them.
“Hongjoong hyung! Seonghwa hyung!” Okay, so another mystery solved. The scary vampire was called Seonghwa. Hongjoong grinned and ruffled Felix’s hair like a dad. Seonghwa stood at arm’s length from him, an odd expression on his face. If Jisung really had to guess, he would say it was guilt, but he couldn’t fathom why he would look at Felix like that.
“How are you feeling, Felix?” Seonghwa’s voice was. Just as guilty sounding as his face. Felix nodded, looking down at his chest.
“It’s perfectly fine, hyung.” Whatever Felix was referring to was hidden underneath the ruffly white shirt. Yesterday, everyone was pretty much covered in blood whether they were injured or not. It was a pure blood bath, and Jisung was pretty sure the only reason he got away relatively unscathed was because Minho and Hongjoong covered for him. Hongjoong killed off rogues with his rapier with the elegance of a ballet dancer, but Minho was an entirely different story. Jisung had swung his scythe as much as he could in his current state, but it was barely necessary. Minho stood in front of him, solid like an armored tank. Every time a vampire came close, Minho was there for it with his iron knuckles, fixed with spikes. First punch broke ribs, and second punch crushed the heart. That was the goal, but most were not so simple. Those who made it hard for Minho to aim got a direct fist in their faces, and it got so graphic even Jisung, seasoned as he was with violence against vampires, had to look away. The way Minho’s spikes, combined with the force of those brass knuckles, tore through flesh was truly horrifying. Minho’s fighting style was like this usually, but there was something about this that made his attacks less methodical and more instinctual and frantic. His most vivid memory from the fight was when Minho turned around to look at him, and Jisung nearly screamed at the way blood had splattered everywhere: his face, his arms, his feet… not one spot was spared. Blood dripped down from his cheek into his clenched teeth, and what Jisung couldn’t get out of his mind were his eyes, manically bright and driven with fear. He never understood why Minho looked so scared. He was killing everything that came into his path. What was he so afraid of?
“Jisung, I have your coffee… oh, morning, hyungs.” Jongho had returned with his caffeine fix. He set down the mug in front of him and a beautifully made silver pitcher in front of Yeosang. Seonghwa and Hongjoong sat down, and Jongho turned to them. “Should I get more glasses?”
“No, we’ll be fine.” Hongjoong gave him a nod. “Oh, is that coffee?”
“Jisung requested it.” The vampire let out a sound of understanding and leaned on his hand.
“Ah, the one thing that I no longer have the taste for.” Jisung took the mug and brought it up to his lips, muttering a thanks to Jongho, who nodded in reply. The man then proceeded to pick up the pitcher and fill the two empty glasses. The second the liquid hit the glass, Jisung’s mug nearly slipped out of his hand.
Garnet. Burgundy. Vermilion.
Not one of those could quite capture what that shade was. The shade that lit the survival instinct of any human ablaze.
The color that painted Minho into someone that Jisung didn’t recognized just last night.
Felix glanced at him worriedly, but Jisung couldn’t even see him. All he could focus on was how Yeosang picked up the glass and as if it was just another day, brought it up to his cherry lips. He drained the glass, and that was when the mug finally slipped from his hand. It clattered onto the table, coffee splashing everywhere, and Felix cried out in alarm. He gripped his arm, and the coldness made Jisung yank back his arm as he spun around, only to stare directly into Felix’s bright red eyes.
That was when it hit him.
It didn’t really set in last night, not when they were all laughing and catching up on the bed. His memory seemed to working in reverse, making him remember all the details he had chosen to ignore. Of how Felix never sat too close to them, and of how Felix didn’t hug him like he always did before. Most terrifying of all, the uncanny coldness that assaulted the nerves on his skin the one time he hugged Felix tightly as he cried. The gravity of it all crashed into him like a bucket of cold water.
Felix would never be warm ever again. Felix was like Yeosang, and like him, he would also drink from the full glass of burgundy in front of him.
No matter how human they all appeared now, what hid underneath was as evident as ever.
He slapped a hand over his mouth as he screamed, tears springing to his eyes. Felix was staring at him, the most worried he had ever seen him.
“Sungie. Oh my god, Jisungie?” He reached forward, and Jisung shook his head frantically. Felix flinched back like he was burned. He felt a warm hand on his shoulder, and he looked up. Jongho was staring down at him, worried but also stern.
“Come with me.” He said definitely. Jisung nodded mechanically, and Jongho practically tore him out of his seat. Felix opened his mouth, but he closed it again, a broken look in his eyes. Jongho dragged him out of the room, and as soon as they stepped into the hall, Jisung thrashed in Jongho’s hold. The man let go, and Jisung threw himself against the wall, sliding down against it as his chest rose and fell way too fast. Jongho knelt down in front of him.
“Breathe, Jisung.”
“Oh god, Jongho. What have I done- ”
“Just breathe. In and out. Like this.” Jongho breathed in deeply and exhaled. “Copy me.” Jisung could do nothing but follow, and soon enough he no longer felt like his lungs were collapsing. He stared at Jongho, who stared back stoically. “What happened?”
“He was drinking… drinking…” The word wouldn’t come out of Jisung’s mouth. Jongho’s gaze hardened.
“How else is Yeosang hyung going to live?”
“We need that to live!” Jisung shot back. He leaned forward into Jongho’s face. “Where did that even come from?! How could you just handle it like that?” The man stared him down, sharp as a knife. Jisung stared back, refusing to back down. “Vampires hunt, don’t they? Is that how they got that? By slashing someone’s neck like a pig and drain everything?”
“If you think we’re just savages, I suggest you to stop it right then and there.” He began coldly as he pulled Jisung up toward him by his shirt. “Seonghwa hyung always sources them from hospitals or volunteers. He doesn’t even hunt, and everyone else in the coven followed his lead.”
“You’re not even one of them.” The second those words were out of his mouth, Jisung regretted it. Jongho’s face went slack, stricken, before he snarled and slammed Jisung back down. Jisung winced as his back hit the wall, and Jongho stood over him, fist clenched so hard they went white. Memories of Minho telling him how he fought Jongho surged to his mind, and he shrank back even though there was nowhere to run, pressing both his hands against the wall. However, Jongho didn’t attack him.
“If fresh blood was what it took to keep them alive, I would get it myself.” The man turned on his heels. “I don’t care what that makes me in your eyes.” Jisung watched him walk away, and it was only until he finally entered the dining room did he slowly stand up on shaky legs. He stumbled back up the stairs, not even daring to return. He staggered in the wrong direction, and the second he looked up, he squeezed his eyes shut. Changing direction, he swayed on his feet as his heart burned. When he finally reached the bedroom, he collapsed on the bed.
“Mmm…” Minho stirred awake beside him. He must have turned over in when Jisung was gone. “Ji… sung?”
“It’s still early.” He tried to keep his voice as stable as he could. “Go back to sleep, hyung.” Minho opened a sleepy eye at him, and Jisung smiled through his clenched teeth. “Please.” Had he been more awake, Minho probably would’ve questioned him, but fortunately, he wasn’t. Jisung watched as his hyung closed his eye and fell back into his slumber. He waited until his breathing became completely rhythmic, before he sucked in a shuddering breath. A tear sprang up in his eye and slid down the side of his face as he pressed a hand over his mouth, smothering the ugly sobs that bubbled up his throat.
The acorn necklace felt cold against his chest, colder than he ever remembered.