Chapter Text
Poe's internal body clock woke him two hours before dawn. The only light source in his quarters came from the thin stripes running along the edges of the ceiling. Right now they were automatically a soft amber glow but during daylight hours they were a bright white. There was no window, only the sliding door.
The lack of window used to make Poe uncomfortable, he liked to see the sky. He was always watching the sky, when he had been a child it had been because he was constantly waiting for his mother to return from a mission. He guessed the sky was in his blood, he had always felt he had been destined to fly, he couldn't imagine not being a pilot. If he spent too long on the ground he began to feel trapped - he had had the same unsettled feeling when he had been allocated his quarters here.
But not now, he longer hated being on the ground; he no longer spent all his time keeping one longing eye on the sky. He had found something that made his heart soar more than flying.
Finn was sleeping soundly next to him. The bunk wasn't designed for two grown men, Finn had his own room but barely used it, not that Poe was complaining. The ex-Stormtrooper was breathing steadily, lying on his front with arms tucked underneath the pillow.
Last night Finn had made him promise he'd wake him when it was time but watching him now in the weak amber light, Poe found he hesitated. It was rare that the younger man slept so peacefully, he was regularly plagued with nightmares. Though since he had begun to write his name over his scarred skin where his soulmate mark should be, Finn had been sleeping better. That was another reason why Poe was reluctant to leave whereas normally he was exhilarated to be given a mission and a chance to fly.
Poe carefully snuggled up against Finn, pressing his lips to Finn's broad shoulder. The younger didn't stir so Poe risked running his hand down his back. He spread his fingers wide so he could feel both the raised scar and smooth skin down Finn's spine. Even now, four months later, Poe still felt a remnant of the fear he had felt when he had seen Finn bleeding and motionless. He kissed Finn's shoulder again and closed his eye, hugging the other for a moment. Inhaling, he memorised Finn's scent before he reluctantly removed his arm and rolled away.
He got dressed as quietly as he could, pulling on underwear, a black t-shirt then his orange and white overalls. He zipped them up to his waist and tied the sleeves around his middle to keep it from slipping down.
The lights overhead were gradually brightening as time crept closer towards dawn. Poe stuffed his feet into his boots and hastily ran his fingers through his bed-tousled dark hair. It was time to leave.
He return to the bunk and leant over Finn.
"I'll be back before you know it," he whispered, kissing the corner of his mouth gently. Finn mumbled in his sleep and Poe smiled softly, feeling his heart swell with love. He almost decided to stay then, to get undressed and slip back into bed with the other man. But, he reminded himself, the world was bigger than just him and Finn. He was the best pilot of the Resistance, leader of his squadron, he had responsibilities and a mission to complete.
Outside, there was a distinct chill in the air and Poe shivered. He untied the sleeves of his overalls, putting his arms into them and hitching the familiar uniform up his torso. He strode across the runway towards the stationary X-wings, zipping up his overalls as he went.
Overhead, the sky was just beginning to lighten, the black turning to dark blue and the multitude of stars fading from sight. It was quiet on the base, eerily still. But Poe knew that in just an hour or so, the place would be alive with actively.
Poe stopped by his X-wing, patting the metal lovingly. He spotted the three members of his squad who were accompanying him on the mission checking over their own fighter-crafts. He waved at them in greeting and they waved back. Usually he would go over to them and chat and crack a joke or two, but not today, today his heart was heavy about leaving Finn and he tried to busy himself by checking his X-wings engines.
General Organa arrived half an hour later to wish them good luck and a safe return. Poe wasn't concerned, it was a simple mission that held little risk if they stuck to the plan and kept their cool.
The sky was a stunning gradient by the time Poe was up on his X-Wing and about to settle into the cockpit. To the east the sun was blooming on the horizon, a burning sphere of fire and life, but to the west the night clung on, and in between was every shade of blue that could be imagined fading into one another flawlessly. Poe was momentarily transfixed.
"Let's go, Dameron!" Encouraged one of his team mates. Poe shook his head and forced himself to focus on the mission. Focus on the mission and get back safe - return to Finn.
***
Finn rolled over, stretching his hand across the narrow space of mattress, reaching for Poe. But his hand closed around nothing. His eyes snapped open and he sat up sharply. The room was deserted and Poe's orange and white overalls were gone from where they had been hanging ready.
For a moment, Finn didn't move, he just sat with his hands limp in his lap and eyes wide. His scar prickled and he looked down. The ink was still there, though faded from wearing it had rubbed against fabric during the night.
Poe had promised, he had promised he'd not leave for the mission without saying a proper goodbye, but he had. Finn felt so small and alone, sitting in Poe's quarters without the pilot himself. He knew Poe not waking him up didn't mean anything, not really, he was sure the older man had just not wanted to disturb him. But Finn had wanted - needed - to say goodbye, just in case...
He kicked back the blanket and swung his legs off the bed, a shiver running up his legs as his bare feet touched the cool floor. With trembling fingers, he touched the scar over his heart.
Soulmates could feel each other's pain, even their death, the the topic was not talked about, it was taboo, a tragedy everyone has to face but couldn't avoid. Did that apply to Finn too? Without a soulmate mark he was unable to feel Poe's pain directly as if it were his own, but would he feel the pilot's death if something went terribly wrong on the mission? Poe had tried to assure Finn that the mission was routine, just a surveillance operation, and that he had done it countless times before. But Finn hadn't been satisfied and that was why he had wanted to bid his soulmate a proper farewell. Just in case...
Finn wished, he wished with everything he had, that he had a soulmate mark, that his bond with Poe was just like everyone else's. Poe writing his name on his skin had helped ease many of Finn's insecurities, but it would never be like the real thing, it wasn't permanent. What if his worst nightmare was realised and Poe did not return from his mission? The pen would fade, it was unavoidable, what then did he have to prove to others and himself that Poe Dameron had been his soulmate?
It wasn't permanent...
The idea burst into Finn's mind and suddenly he was on his feet and hurrying to throw some clothes on. He knew what he had to do.
***
When Poe landed his X-Wing he could already see Finn waiting for him on the edge of the runway. Joy exploded in his chest at the sight of his soulmate. The mission had had him away from Finn for just under 24 hours, but it had felt like a lifetime. Poe did feel, however, a slightly tremor of apprehension. He hoped Finn wasn't mad at him for breaking his promise and not waking him up before he had left.
The second Poe jumped down from the cockpit Finn was there. Before Poe could open his mouth to speak, the ex-Stormtrooper was kissing him, his strong arms around his waist pulling him against his body. The kiss was like lightning, even after the brief time apart the return felt desperate.
"Finn," Poe gasped as they broke apart, "What-"
"-I have something to show you," Finn interrupted, his voice serious but eyes alive with anticipation.
Poe didn't even get time to agree before Finn was dragging him through the crowd that was rapidly assembling in the direction of the living quarters.
"Finn, wait, I have to report to the General!" But he might as well have been talking to himself.
They reached his quarter's in a whirlwind and the next thing Poe knew was that he was inside and Finn's hands were on his shoulders pushing him down to sit on his bunk. Baffled and a little worried, Poe watched with wide eyes as Finn took off his brown jacket - Poe's old one of course - then peeled off his shirt over his head. Poe was caught off guard but he felt a smirk pull at his lips at the sight of Finn's muscles beneath his dark skin.
Finn dropped his shirt to the floor and stood in front of Poe, eyes glittering with tears. Noticing them, Poe began to say, "Finn, what's going on? What's wrong?" But then he saw what was different about his lover's body. His handwriting over Finn's scar was bolder than it had ever been. He stood up to get a better look and saw to his confusion the skin was slightly raised and looked irritated. The mark was as vivid and beautiful as his own, as all soulmate marks, but how could that be?
"I-I got the guy who did it to trace over your handwriting exactly," Finn whispered, his eyes locked on Poe's face, trying to gage his reaction.
"Finn, I don't under-"
"-I got it tattooed, I needed to make it permanent, I -"
Poe grabbed Finn's face between his hands and kissed him passionately. Finn returned the kiss frantically, his hands clinging on to Poe's back, digging into the heavy flight overalls. All this time Poe had told Finn that it didn't matter to him that he didn't have a soulmate mark, and it had been the truth, he didn't love Finn any less or think their love lesser somehow. But see his name - in his very handwriting - bold and black on Finn's skin, overwhelmed him with a mixture of exhilaration, relief, and possessiveness. They tumbled onto the bunk in a mess of tugging hands trying to rid them of clothes and heated kisses and groans.
"Why?" Poe asked simply later on as they lay in a tangle of sweaty limbs on the pilot's bunk.
Finn wasn't sure how to answer at first, so he watched Poe's fingers trace around the outside of the tattoo - careful to avoid the tender skin - as if it was some kind of captivating dance.
"Just in case," he answered eventually, press a kiss into the pilot's tousled hair. Poe laid his hand flat over the other's beating heart and turned his head upwards to capture Finn's lips.
"I love you, Finn," he murmured against the younger man's lips.
Finn nuzzled him and tightening his arms around Poe, "I love you too."