Chapter Text
Tony did not go into his therapy session on Saturday because he over slept because doing charity work is hard and complicated.
Also he may have, maybe, made out with Steven Grant Rogers after eating too much Burger King.
Burger King is not makeout food. Strawberries or grapes are make out food. Nothing that contains grease in it is makeout food. Except maybe pizza because pizza is like an everything food.
But anyways they had just came back from a Burger King and they were then sitting in living room watching whatever popped up on tv. Which was apparently reruns of Keeping Up with the Kardashians.
"This is not how the rich and famous live they're blowing smoke up people's asses!" Tony says angrily to the tv.
"How would you know you're not famous." Steve says with a smirk.
"Watch it pretty boy." Tony says glaring at Steve.
"You think I'm pretty?" Steve says with a lopsided grin like all the cute boys do when they're being overly annoying and cute. No one should be able to do that at the same time.
"Listen you are literally perfect in every sense of the word that I don't want to go over because it will slightly shrink my huge ego."
Steve laughs really hard at that. So hard in fact that he snorts.
There's a moment of silence before Tony is speaking and pulling out his phone at the same time.
"Oh my god you just snorted. I gotta tell everyone I know immediately."
"Do not." Steve says in a warning tone.
"Too late." Tony says pressing send on his mini mass text to their immediate friend group.
Tony doesn't even get to gloat for a few seconds before Steven Grant Rogers is on top of him trying to grab his phone.
"I already sent it there's no point in this!" Tony says gripping on his phone for dear life as Steve tries to pry it from his hands.
"You're insufferable." Steve says loosening his grip on the phone so that now instead of a fun friendly game of wrestling for a phone, Steve was just straddling Tony with both of them holding the same phone.
"Ooh big word." Tony says rolling his eyes. "Now get off of me."
"Nah I think I'll just sit here." Steve says with a shrug. "Pretty comfortable."
"Really Rogers? This is stupid."
"Ooh small word." Steve says in a mocking tone.
Tony looks up at Steve for a second before he rolls his eyes. Partly because he was annoyed but partly because this was embarrassing because the ceiling light kind of left like a halo around Steve's hair and his thighs were just so perfectly fitted around Tony's and his white tshirt seemed just a bit tighter than it usually did. And it usually looked like it wanted to tear everytime that he even flexed a muscle.
"...ony. Tony? Are you okay you're red. You can breath right? I'll get of-" Steve makes a movement to slide off of Tony and Tony's hands went to his thighs to make him stop.
"No no. You're fine." Tony says quietly. A little too quietly.
"Tony. Tony can I kiss you?" Steve says in a questioning tone that sounded so unsure of itself that it was like....a double question.
Tony laughs breathlessly and nods, "Yes. You sure can."
So Steven Grant Rogers leans down and kisses Antonio Edwardo Stark straight on the lips and doesn't stop until the kisses turn into drowsy pecks and they're both sleep.
--
Now this isn't the first time Tony has woken up on his couch. Shit, this isn't the first time he's woken up on his couch following a makeout.
But it is the first time Tony has woken up on his couch with a 6'2 football player spooning him. On a couch that's only for sitting.
In other words Tony falls off the couch as soon as he decides to stretch and roll over in, what he thought to be, his bed.
He yelped as soon as he made contact to the hardwood floor.
"What the hell. Bucky is that you?" Steve asks groggily rubbing his eyes, yawning quietly. He even yawns cute what the fuck.
"Saying another man's name after we had such an enthralling night together, you really wound my heart Mr. Rogers." Tony says feigning a oldie tv lady accent.
Steve laughs and his voice is gravely from sleep until it isn't and he shoots upright and stares at Tony who's now just sitting on the floor as if he hadn't just fell there.
"Tony? Oh shit what the fuck happened." Steve groans pushing his couch hair back out of his face.
"Wow two curses from you? In one sentence? I'm appalled Mr. Rogers." Tony says not dropping the oldies accent even though it wasn't consistent with the first one he did.
"Tony I'm serious." Steve says his voice strict like it was during paintball tournaments when everyone (except Tony and Clint) vote Steve to be the leader.
Tony rolls his eyes. "Last night you asked me to kiss me so I said yeah and we made out for a little bit and then fell asleep. That's it."
"No drinking no....no nothing else right?" Steve says less of a question but more as a confirmation to himself.
Tony answers anyways. "No nothing else."
"Well uh. Where's your bathroom." Steve asks shyly.
"Steve you know where my bathroom is." Tony says rolling his eyes.
"Right. I do. I'm just gonna. Go there now." Steve stands up like a newborn deer when he first gets up. Natasha and Tony always made fun of him for it whenever they had sleep overs.
"Have fun take pictures!" Tony calls after Steve and Steve just gives him this strange, co fused look before going into the bathroom.
Tony groans and lays on the floor.
"Jarvis what time is it!" He calls out.
"11:43." The bot answers calmly. "Your therapy session with Layla started an hour and 13 minutes ago."
"Jarvis you know my session is only an hour long why didn't you just say it was over."
"Because I'm trying new things master Tony."
"You suck Jarvis."
"Am I interrupting something?" Steve asks wiping his wet hand into his pants. "You don't have anymore paper towel."
"Nothing I'm just taking to Jarvis."
Steve laughs. "It's really cool you build him yourself."
"Yeah...it is." Tony agrees.
"So uh. I'm just gonna, go. Now." Steve says pointing to the door with his thumb. "Foot ball practice that I'm 20 minutes late for."
"You aren't gonna stay and snuggle? You just hit it and quit it?" Tony asks fake hurt in his voice.
Steve laughs again. He's laughing a lot for a guy who just woke up after a night of kissing his fake nemesis. "Bye Tony."
Tony waves at him from the floor and just like that he's gone.
--
Tony makes burnt toast and eats it because if your toast isn't burned then it isn't toast.
He's eating his burned butter and jam covered toast with one hand and holding his phone with the other as he texts Pepper the following:
I made out with Steve last night
And the he turns off his phone goes to his bed and falls asleep.
--
Tony wakes up and two things are immediately apparent.
Pepper is hovering over him and Pepper is yelling at him. He assumes it's happening at the same time because you can't have a hovering Pepper without a yelling Pepper.
"Whatttt." Tony whines rolling over, not falling into the floor.
"You can't just text me something like that and turn off your phone what the fuck Tony!" Pepper says sticking her phone in Tony's face.
"I didn't do anything!" Tony grumbles pulling his pillow over his face. "Leave me alone."
"Making out with Steve Rogers is nothing." Pepper asks crossing her arms over her chest. Like Tony still has the pillow over his head but he knows that she's crossing her arms. It's a pepper thing.
"Oh yeah that did happen." Tony says. "Yeah it was nothing. He just left in the morning."
"Without saying anything?" Pepper asks sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Yeah he said something but then he said he had football practice so he left." Tony says groggily sitting up.
"Steve Rogers. Who would've thought you and him would've made out."
"Natasha. I think. Natasha infers everything until she's right." Tony
Pepper snorts. "So tell me how was it?" She asked wriggling her brows.
"Surprisingly decent."