Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

"They're going to see us, fuckface!" Bakugou whisper shouted, clearly frustrated. 

Kirishima looked back at him, obviously feeling the same emotions. "Not my fault they won't read the obvious sign that we're closed." He could barely see Bakugou in the darkness of the cafe, but he could feel him. A throbbing from below, aching to be touched. 

"They've got to be the most retarded girls in the world if they think this cafe is open," the blonde muttered. 

Kirishima agreed, then tossed a look back to the windows. The two girls were talking, probably discussing how to get in. He was trying to watch them carefully but then he felt lips on his neck. "Dude! Not now!" his gaze whipped back to Bakugou, who had a smirk on his face. "You do realize these girls are trying to get inside, right?" Clearly Bakugou didn't care, because he tried to go back at it on his neck again. Kirishima pushed him off then said, "Follow me."

He took Bakugou's wrist and ran to the pantry, using the lined tables as a way to hide and not expose themselves running. When they were finally in the closet, Kirishima pushed him inside before closing the door and locking it. 

"Holy fuck, that was stressful," he said, resting his forehead on the door. "I really hope they get the memo and leave." He turned around, catching sight of a panting Bakugou, leaned against the wall across from him, staring at him with hungry eyes. "Whatever you're thinking of doing, that moment was ruined about 2 minutes ago."

"Boo," Bakugou replied. "You scared?"

"I'm not scared, I'm cautious."

There was a need gap between them, but that distance felt much closer than it seemed. 2 little voices pranced around Kirishima's mind. One of them was that hopeful angel who said figure it out, while there was that grinning devil that said kiss him kiss him! He wasn't sure which one to listen to. He could hear Do I Wanna Know By Hozier playing on the stereo outside, which definitely wasn't helping him in the situation.

"I can't feel doing this dance with you," he finally said. Saying those words was almost as vulnerable as baring his heart. "I can't keep tiptoeing around your feelings, desperate to find out what it is that you exactly want. You either like me or you don't, but I'm not going to take these mixed signals."

Bakugou watched him for a moment before speaking. "I literally just kissed you, Shittyhair."

Kirishima closed his eyes, taking a breath. He wasn't going to get frustrated. "People interlink even with zero attraction toward each other. That's why hookups and friends with benefits are a thing."

"So, what, you think I'm going to hookup with you?" Bakugou asked. Now he was the one getting frustrated. 

"No, I'm not saying that. I'm trying to figure out whether you see me—" Kirishima stopped. He couldn't get the words out of his chest. 

Bakugou took a step forward. "See you like what? Spit it out, Ejirou."

"More than a friend," Kirishima finally said. "Like I do."

He felt like he was taking all of his armor off. It was like he was taking everything that protected him against the wicked world and just set it to the side. And being in this position was more than uncomfortable—it was terrifying. To be face to face with the unknown, desperate to find answers yet so scared to be given the information you weren't hoping to hear. 

"I haven't felt like this for such a long time," Kirishima began. "But I feel it with you. Every touch, every song, every memory. Everything I do just somehow leads back to you, and when I'm stuck in that hole where I feel like I have no one to go to, you're always there. It's like I'm surrounded by shadows, circling me and mocking me for my feelings. I'm reluctant to accept any sort of care for the fear that it'll only damage me further, but then you're there and suddenly everything feels better and more complete and I can finally breathe."

There it was. He finally said it.

"And I know sometimes things don't always work out in the way that people hope, but I'm begging you to at least consider my feelings because I've been battling with this for so damn long. I'm not sure how much longer I can go without letting my love unravel and intertwine with your own." Fuck, now he was crying.

Can you find me?

"I don't want to keep going on this loop of friends but not lovers, I want you to tell me how you really feel. I want you to tell me what your vision for the future is, and if it's not with me, that's fine, but I don't want to keep dancing around with you, clashing with the possibility that I might have just found the love of my life and not some guy that just wants to be here for a quickie in my bed."

The closet was cold and quiet. No words were exchanged for a while, only Kirishima watching Bakugou, who was a few feet in front of him, eyes cast downward and shame taking over his features. He looked like a hurt puppy, and Kirishima wanted to so badly hug him, but he forced himself to stay in his original spot. He wasn't going to be the one chasing this time. 

"You're right," Bakugou finally said. "I don't know what I want. I'm torn between loving you and hiding. I'm scared of the unknown, I'm scared of being hurt, and I'm terrified of losing someone as close to me as you. I'm stubborn, and I see things in black and white most of the time. My past is black, and my future is white—but with you, it's grey."

He lifted his head up, finally meeting Kirishima's burning gaze. Tears feel down his face as he spoke, yet he made no move to wipe them off. "I moved here because I wanted to start over, find myself. I didn't expect to fall in love with my coworker, or actually develop a passion for coffee and the quiet night here."

Then, Bakugou said something Kirishima would never forget. "And I know I shouldn't be resisting my feelings, and I hate it with a burning passion—but I'm also so scared that maybe this is all a dream and I'm going to wake up all alone."

"What if I show you that you're not alone?" Kirishima asked softly. "What if I help you see that this isn't a dream?"

"It's easy to say what if until it's actually you who's experiencing this nightmare."

"Then I will show you."

Kirishima slowly closed the gap between them, grabbing Bakugou's hands and squeezing them. Bakugou flinched, eyes growing wide and trying to take a step back. The look in his eyes was pure fear, encasing that animalistic urge to fight or fly. It was terrifying to see. 

"Sit down," Kirishima whispered. He took a seat on the floor, guiding the blonde down as well. "I'm not going to hurt you. I just want you to be open with me. Can you do that?"

Bakugou nodded. 

"Okay, good." He took a breath before speaking again. "We can take things slow, is that alright?"

"Yeah," Bakugou whispered. "And when you say slow, I mean turtle slow."

That emitted a laugh from Kirishima. "Alright, buddy."

They sat there together, sharing small words in hushed voices. It had to have been at least 30 minutes of speaking, but as they shared memories and giggled about stories at work, a comfortable silence settled between them. Finally, when Kirishima began to feel sleep washing over him, he stood up, offering for them to leave. 

"I'm sure the girls are gone by now," he said. "If not, we'll just call the cops."

"Or we can just rob 'em."

"Or we can not do that."

Kirishima opened the door, walking out of the pantry closet, Bakugou tagging behind. The cafe was quite, which meant those two girls from before had left. The moon cast a soft light through the windows and across the floors, illuminating a few of the items in a glow.

"Looks like it's all good," Bakugou stated. 

Kirishima walked up from behind, setting his apron on the hook and grabbing his phone and keys from the counter. He stepped out of the cafe, holding the door open, waiting for Bakugou to come out. When he did, they continued their march down to their apartments. The air was a little warmer since summer was near, and Kirishima embraced that sensation. Bakugou pulled out his phone and typed something on what Kirishima assumed was Spotify. Shortly after, a short strum of guitars and the beat of drums filled the silence. 

"What's this called?" he asked. 

Bakugou glanced down at his phone. "Bowery by Zach Bryan. It's another song that's on my list for you."

"Ah, okay," he replied. They listened to the tunes, then slowly took in the lyrics. It was a wonderful song, pretty well fit for the night. 

I know you'll never be fully done or fully satisfied.

"When did you know you were gay?" Bakugou suddenly asked. 

That made Kirishima falter in his steps, but he quickly recollected himself. He wasn't going to embarrass himself like this. "Sorry, caught me off guard." He shook off his anxiety with a laugh before truly answered. "I think it was sophomore year of high school. I was with this girl at the time, but every time I became intimate with her, it just felt wrong."

"What do you mean?"

Kirishima let out a sigh. It was a little difficult to find the words to explain, but he knew he had to. "There isn't an exact reason, it just felt better to be with a guy. I felt stronger, happy, more lustful, you know?"

Bakugou stared at him, monotone look on his face. "Sure, fuckface."

"I'm serious!" Kirishima exclaimed. "And I don't want to worry about any child accidents either, even though that's a selfish reason. At the end of the day, I want someone like me, someone I know I won't break. I never found that in a girl." 

"Wow so you're a misogynist and selfish, got it."

"Bakugou!" Kirishima whined. "You know that's not what I mean." He pushed the blonde, which resulted in a push back, and soon they were play fighting in the middle of the street, laughing like children. "Okay enough! I'm gonna wake up with 10 new bruises from you!"

"Like hell you're gonna," Bakugou replied, but he fulfilled his pleads and backed off. 

"Thank you," Kirishima said. "Now where'd that question even come from."

All he got was an odd look in return. "Why else do you think I'm asking, fucktard?"

"I'm curious!"

"I'm asking because I'm curious!" Bakugou smacked him on the side of the head. "It's a bit hard to formulate your sexuality when you tell a guy you're not gay after the arcade, but then you kiss him at a cafe, don't ya think?"

"True that, I suppose," the redhead mumbled, rubbing the back of his head.

I told her that she's everything that I lack deep inside.

"I mean it's not as complicated as everyone makes it seem. If you like guys, you like guys. If you like girls, you like girls. Hell, you can like both. At the end of the day, you like someone who makes you happier than anyone else. Life is too short to worry about the opinion of others. Your life is not a game for the satisfaction of those around you, but rather for your own enjoyment. 

It was small phrases like that which caught Bakugou's interest. He stopped in his tracks, causing Kirishima to not realize until he was a few steps ahead. He turned around, confused.

"Why you stop?" he asked. 

The wind chased their clothing, spinning through their hair and lifting the fabric up. He stood there unbothered, yet his face said numbers. It felt like that first night they closed the cafe together, when Kirishima had taken him to his favorite spot. That same silent awakening, and Kirishima wasn't sure what to make of it. 

Then, Bakugou took few slow steps forward, all the way until he was barely a foot away. He reached out, grabbing Kirishima's wrist. 

"I'm going to do something stupid, okay?"

And I'll make you burn bright. 

"I don't think there's anything you could do that could be stupid, but go ahead," Kirishima replied, laughing a little.

He didn't expect Bakugou to wrap his arms around his neck, pulling him in close and tightening that grip. He didn't expect that soft flutter in his chest to turn into something much more flourishing, nor did he expect to find himself to immediately wrap his own arms around the blonde's waist. It was just like that night, he knew it, and yet he never wanted to let go. 

He was exactly where he wanted to be. 

As the heat of the day. 

There were no words exchanged, but that was okay. They stood there, in the middle of the street, lamps illuminated the brick pathway and concrete road, casting over their features. Kirishima squeezed his eyes shut, inhaling deep and smelling that familiar scent. Their bodies were flush, warmth spreading through and enveloping them in that comforting sensation as one does when they're intimate. 

Fuck, this was better than intimacy. if he could, he'd stay like this forever.

If you're in it for a long run

I got the passion

When they parted ways, Kirishima gave him one last hug, trying hard not to keep hold. He really wanted to hug him. Bakugou just felt that good. 

"See you next shift?" he asked. 

"I guess," Bakugou answered. 

Kirishima nodded, then glanced down at his lips. He realized his mistake, eyes quickly darting back up. "Sorry, I didn't mean to, I know you don't want to do—"

He was cut off by soft lips on his, surprise already being washed over by love and eagerness as he chased Bakugou's kiss, desperate to feel more. He held him close, bodies flush and lips moving around in synchronization. It just felt so nice and fuck he was getting too ahead of himself. But Bakugou was the one who initiated it, so he knew he'd have to soak up the most of it before he had to pull away. That same taste, that same feeling, Kirishima welcomed it with open arms. After such a long and torturous month with this guy, he was finally getting what he wanted. So no, he wasn't going to stop at any moment. 

They spent a lot longer in that spot than anticipated, but hey, Kirishima wasn't complaining. Only when another couple passed by, yelling at them to, "Kiss in private like the rest of us," did they finally separate. And when Kirishima entered his dark apartment, kicking his shoes off and heading straight to his bed, falling face first into the pillow, that was when he let himself smile. 

Bakugou liked him, a lot. And he even kissed him. 

"Oh my lord," he said to himself. "Holy shit. I can't believe I did that."

It was safe to say that he got a good night's sleep.