Chapter Text
Kyle Broflovski’s temper tended to take on a life of its own. Even when Kyle wanted to remain neutral, all his temper wanted to do was start a fuss.
After a lifetime of friendship, Stan thought he was used to Kyle’s bursts of anger. He’d scream and rant until he tired himself out, and things would calm down for a while before he moved on to the next thing.
“Is it seriously too much to ask that my friends don’t spy on me?”
Although, most of the time it was Cartman at the center of Kyle’s anger. And he was the one getting screamed at.
“We weren’t spying on you, dude.” Stan lied, backing away.
“Bullshit.” Kyle hissed. “You guys don’t even have any snow gear with you! The only reason that you’d be out here is to spy on me!”
Stan hadn’t bothered to run off after being caught. He knew that he’d have to deal with Kyle eventually, and he thought it was best to get it over with. So he and Kenny had waited at the bottom of the ski lift, as Stan fought back waves of nausea and Kenny did his best to calm him down.
“Are you guys fucking serious?” Kyle asked as soon as he got off of the ski lift.
He was fuming and alone, having presumably sent Davíd away so he could deal with his friends.
“Kyle-“ Kenny started, reaching out to set a hand on his shoulder.
Kyle batted it away with a flattened hand, and Kenny flinched.
“Why would you guys try to ruin my date? That’s what you were trying to do, right?”
Stan froze. What was he supposed to say to that? No, Kyle! We weren’t trying to ruin your date! We were spying on you and Davíd because I’m in love with you!
Kyle stared at his friends expectantly and when no one answered, he just continued on his rampage.
“I’d expect this from Cartman, but you guys? What in the fuck were you trying to accomplish here? Or was all of this just to humiliate me?”
Stan just blinked at him, flustered. Kyle’s nose was pink from cold, and snowflakes sprinkled the collar of his coat. He looked like a scene straight out of a romantic comedy.
“I’m sorry.” Stan muttered finally, embarrassed.
Kyle didn’t seem to be in a very forgiving mood. He only groaned, his eyes still flaring with anger.
“Kyle.” Kenny said seriously. “We really are sorry, okay?”
As bad as the situation was, Stan thanked his lucky stars that Kenny was there with him, because Kenny had a remarkable ability to charm people into leniency.
Maybe it was his blue eyes or boyish smile, or maybe it was something else entirely. But whatever it was, it was useful. Kyle’s face softened just the slightest bit, and some of the tension in his shoulders relaxed.
“Sometimes people do stupid things.” Kenny continued. “Especially when they...really care about someone.”
He was staring intently at Kyle now, and the two of them seemed to be having a silent conversation. Kyle paused for a second to think about Kenny’s words and then raised his eyebrows, turning his head.
“Maybe you’re right.” He said, still speaking to Kenny but looking at Stan instead. “But if someone has strong feelings, there are more constructive ways to deal with them.”
“What?” Stan asked, startled by the sudden attention on him.
Something about the glint in Kyle’s eyes was very intimidating. Before he’d been angry, but now he looked even more intense.
“Whatever.” He said darkly. “You can be so clueless sometimes.”
Something in Stan’s stomach dropped. Before Kyle had been talking to both of them, but that last statement seemed to take Kenny out of the equation entirely.
“Kyle, I-“
“I don’t have time for this right now.” Kyle interrupted. “I have a date to get back to.”
••••
Tweek and Craig were sitting up in bed when Stan returned to the cabin, hunched over Craig’s laptop and smiling at whatever video they were watching. Stan groaned. He really wasn’t in the mood to be around a happy couple, and Tweek and Craig were the happiest couple he knew.
The second the cabin door opened, Tweek ripped out the earbuds he and Craig were sharing and paused the video. Craig looked annoyed, but focused his attention on Stan and Kenny.
“How did everything go?” Tweek asked. “Did Kyle have a good time on his date? Did he catch you?”
As Tweek’s voice sped up with overexcitement, Craig placed his own hand over one of Tweek’s.
“Slow down, babe.” He said gently.
“I don’t think Stan really wants to talk about it.” Kenny said.
Tweek made a sympathetic face, but Craig just rolled his eyes.
“It didn’t go like you wanted it to, huh?” He asked derisively. “You and Kyle aren’t going to ride off into the sunset?”
“Be nice!” Tweek scolded him.
“You can’t seriously be surprised that this plan of yours didn’t work out.” Craig said dryly.
Stan glared at him. Leave it to Craig to provide his unnecessary criticism.
“What is that supposed to mean?” Kenny asked, sounding more curious than angry.
“Oh, come on!” Craig said, shaking his head. “When have any of your plans ever worked? Cartman wasn’t even involved this time, so you can’t blame it on him.”
Stan and Kenny side eyed each other.
“At least no one ended up in Peru this time.” Craig said. “Or aiming a bazooka at Steven Spielberg. Right, babe?”
“Can you at least try to be a little more sympathetic?” Tweek asked.
“Thanks, Tweek.” Stan muttered. “Can you tell your boyfriend to fuck off?”
“Fuck off, Craig.”
“Don’t make me the bad guy here!” Craig said. “I’m not the one who decided to fall in love with his annoying best friend.”
Stan ignored him, walking over to He and Kyle’s bed. Ugh, he’d forgotten that they were sharing a bed. That could prove to be very awkward.