Chapter Text
When they arrived back at the house, Percy put Monty down on the bed and climbed in beside him. They fit together like spoons in a drawer, laying quietly, simply enjoying the safety found in the other’s arms. Percy put his hand on Monty’s stomach.
He could feel his ribs through his shirt. Something was clearly wrong.
Percy uncurled himself and threw back the covers a bit and propped himself up on an elbow and looked at Monty.
“Alright.”
“Alright what?” Monty propped himself up on his elbow, mirroring Percy.
“Why aren’t you eating? What were you crying about earlier? What’s been going on?”
Monty looked down at the bed. “Nothing.”
“You know you don’t have to keep secrets anymore. Is it nightmares?”
Monty looked away, and started to pick at the bedspread. He considered turning around and refusing to answer, but this was Percy.
And he remembered all the nights back in England when he had woken up in the middle of the night, screaming and sobbing.
He remembered all the mornings that he had tried to get out of bed, only to be greeted by sharp pain that made him gasp, and the events of the previous day coming back in a rush, making him want to curl up into a ball and never have to face the world again.
He remembered all the nights he had sat alone trembling in the dark of his room, wishing Percy was there. Wishing someone was there. Wishing someone wanted to be there. All the time, not only when he was flirtatious and handsome, and exuding a confidence he wished was real.
In that giant estate, there was no one. With its many acres, and its many servants, and the family members who lived there, there was still no one.
Now he had someone.
And by god, he wasn’t going to give him up because a man in a dream told him he was unworthy.
Even if he still partially believed it.
“yes,” Monty said quietly.
“Was it your father?”
“Sometimes.”
“What else, then?”
“You.”
“Me?” Percy recoiled as if he had been burnt.
“No, wait! Not like that. That’s not what I meant. I don’t fear you.” Monty reached a hand out as if trying to pull Percy back and assure him that he wasn’t going to break under the pressure of closeness. “I promise. I just… I shouldn’t be here. With you,” He finally managed to choke out.
Realising that sounded bad, he tried again, “I… I’ve… I can’t… It’s not that I don’t want to, I just don’t… really…”
“Darling, what is it?” Percy pulled Monty onto his lap and enveloped him in a hug. Monty felt safer almost immediately. He breathed in that distinct Percy smell that made anywhere feel like home. He still felt a bit sick.
“I don’t deserve this,” He whispered, “I don’t deserve you.”
Percy pushed Monty off his lap, so that they were facing each other, knees touching.
“No,” Percy agreed, “You deserve so much more. You deserve a better father. You deserve safety. You deserve happiness and fulfillment. You deserve the freedom to live how you choose. You deserve the whole world, but you have me, and I am prepared to give it to you, because you,” He paused here to pull Monty back onto his lap, “are my whole world. And never doubt it, because we choose each other every day, and we won’t have it any other way.”
Monty was quiet for a moment.
“That rhymed.”
“So it did. You know I’m a poet.”
“I only didn’t know you could write anything but dirty rhymes.”
“How dare you. I am the best poet in all of Greece.”
“Maybe the best poet in the house.”
“That’s the best compliment I’ve ever received.”
“My pleasure.”
Monty closed his eyes, but Percy still had one more matter to address.
“But, Monty, please. You need to start eating more. You’re too thin. It’s a bit worrisome.”
“Don’t worry, darling, as long as I have you with me, you can be sure I’ll never want for anything”
Satisfied, Percy closed his eyes, too. They both sat like that, enjoying the simplicity of each other’s company, until they fell asleep, the sun rising on the horizon over the bright ocean. Their life wasn’t perfect, but it was plenty.