Chapter Text
Theo woke up to another jet of water hitting him straight in the middle of one of his glassy green eyes, having had no idea how much time he spent in the shower. He couldn't feel the tips of his fingers and his head was still pounding uncomfortably, and the only thing he could bring himself to do was turn his head so that the jet wasn't pounding into his pupil again. His vision was still blurry and unfocused as he blinked the sleepiness out of his eyes.
The skin of his thighs felt slick but stiff at the same time, and Theo just barely had time to see the shininess all over them and recall what happened the night before. He briefly remembered passing out in the shower, but nothing else was coming to mind. He couldn't remember anything before he had gotten in and turned the water on, nothing of who he had talked to or where he had been.
There wasn't much time for him left, to think or to stay awake, he realized as his eyes started to close. He fell back into a dreamless sleep, chin pressed against his bare chest.
Theo dipped in and out of consciousness for hours after that, never being awake quite long enough to put everything together, but getting little bits of it along the way. The second time, all he could note that the small window in his bathroom showed that night had fallen, leaving him to wonder how long he had been there before the darkness from outside the window was replicated over his vision again.
The third time, Theo could feel the temperature around him and could tell that he was shaking, shivering under the water that had long since run cold when the tank ran out. Every icy hit to his shoulders and back made his teeth chatter more and he found that he couldn't do more than raise his hand to brush the wet strands of hair out of his eyes before he was exhausted again. At one point during that spell, Theo had accidentally caught water in his mouth and coughed it back up, bringing sharp mercury into his mouth, and being the only liquid in his dry mouth, he couldn't wash it out without bringing more up. He fell back under with the taste irritating the back of his throat.
Then he remembered the pack meeting. Theo's eyes didn't open, but the thoughts came back, visions that he could only feel through vague fuzziness. There was the brief impression of the smells of the house, like wood and a pine candle, but also the ones of Liam's pack that had floated through the air.
Those thoughts were continued when he woke up for the fifth time. Corey, Alec, Hayden, Mason, Liam. He blinked his eyes open heavily and pulled his tongue away from the roof of his mouth dryly, the internal plea for help going unanswered. He knew who he wanted to be there to help him, but even in his state, Theo knew it couldn't happen.
If Liam were there and in a perfect world, he would drop down next to him and brush the hair out of his face that kept falling, asking him if he was still with him and assuring him that he was going to be okay. He'd wrap Theo in a towel and then a hug and somehow fix him just like Liam always managed to, taking the pain away without trying and being there for the recovery, his blue eyes looking at him just as adoringly as Theo was sure they would never. He'd seen that shine before, one reserved for Hayden when they were dating before, and the tiny smile he didn't know he had faded at the thought. They were probably back at Liam's house that second, making up, Hayden being the one in distress and Liam being her savior as usual.
Still, Theo could almost feel the way Liam's touch felt on his arm from hours before, how long ago still uncertain, and it made him feel warmer even in the freezing cold.
He supposed that if he was going to die there, he would have lived that last day just fine. Liam being the last person he ever spoke to wasn't that bad of a deal.
Theo began to say his goodbyes as he felt the dizziness start to take over again, just then realizing that every time he fell asleep, he didn't know if he'd wake back up again. He looked at the tiles across from him, stained silver from his blood, and shut his eyes.
The finality of it all, he thought, was rather poetic, even if it wasn't the violent way he expected to go out.
_
Theo had said goodbye to his life an hour before. He mentally went through all of his belongings and the people he knew while he still had the capacity to do so, checking off each one of them in his head. He said goodbye to nights spend sleeping in his car and getting woken up by the deputies, and tried to remember badge numbers and last names before he drifted off, Parrish, Wilson, Sinclair, Bennett. To the stray cat that sometimes roamed into his backyard and begged for a little bit of food, and the times that he decided to sit with it and watch as it lapped up some water in a little dish. To Scott, Stiles, Malia, Lydia, Kira, no matter what they thought of him now, to Allison, who he had never even met. Hayden, Mason, Corey, Alec, thanking them for giving him a second, third, and fourth chance even if they didn't want to, and Liam for so much more, for forcing them, for believing in him, for being worried even if Theo pushed him away. Blue eyes were on his mind, so much so that he couldn't remember to regret lying to him about how sick he felt.
He had said what he needed to, all in his head, some whispered out into the air, but he hadn't expected it all to be premature. The creaking of the shower's temperature knobs turning and the sudden cold woke him up slowly, groggily, until he managed to open his eyes just a fraction of an inch. There was a familiar scent in the room with him now, but not the one he had been thinking about, and he faintly heard panicked breaths through his pounding ears and rushing blood.
"Please, please," A small, desperate voice sad. "Oh my God, Theo, please, please wake up!"
A strike to his cheek made his eye shut again, but he fought to stay awake, just barely registering that there was actually someone there with him and he wasn't dreaming. Another followed, that of a small hand that smelled of vanilla scented lotion and the sound of a cried-out plea. Hayden.
Even in his daze, Theo was surprised to know that she was the one so desperately pleading for him to wake up. "Theo, Theo!" She said firmly as though he was a small child she was trying to reason with, choking back her emotions. Theo could fuzzily picture her with a stern expression on her face. "Theo, you-you c-can't die. You have something to live for, Theo, someone!" She cried, distraught, and Theo wondered silently for just a moment if she knew about Liam before he was hit again.
Theo was too numb to feel anything around him, just barely able to tell that there was a towel on him based on the light scratchiness on his fingertips, so he couldn't help but find the whole thing a little funny, even in the twisted way it was. Hayden hitting him once again when he was already close to death, but this time trying to save him instead of being the catalyst? And really, what did she expect to happen? For his healing to kick in, for Scott to save him? He wanted to tell her to just leave him in the shower, run far away and get herself a cure. Funny indeed.
Theo always had had a thing for dark humor, after all.
"Theo?" Hayden gasped when he accidentally fluttered his eyelids. Four light smacks to his face - she really needed to work on her bedside manner if she was really considering studying nursing - and Theo managed to open his eyes even if it was only so she'd stop. "Oh my God, holy fuck!"
The slight body heat that he felt around him was suddenly gone, and Hayden's voice slowly sounded like it was getting louder and louder along with everything else in the room; her footsteps on the tiles, the light dripping of the showerhead, his irregular and weak heartbeat. "Hey! Hey, Hi!" She said breathlessly, obviously shaken, and Theo was only about fifty percent sure she wasn't talking to him. "He's still alive!"
Just vaguely, Theo heard the response through Hayden's phone, though he couldn't recognize it at first. "WHAT? Still alive?"
"I came in to check up on him like you said and his door was unlocked, he must have gotten into the shower and he probably collapsed-"
"Collapsed? Is he okay?"
The relief in Hayden's voice faded noticeably. "F-for now. You need to get here, he was bleeding a lot, and he's-he's fading in and out. I don't even know if he's awake right now," She said seriously and as clearly as she could through stress, and if Theo were more awake, he may have admired it. "You have to get here fast."
"Alright, alright! I, um, keep him warm. Tell Theo I'll be there soon."
Something about the panicked way his name was said made Theo's heart jump and keep leaping. "Liam?" He croaked with all the strength he had, which wasn't much at all, and opened up both of his now-dull eyes about halfway. He felt his head start to go fuzzy again, but he fought it. Hayden whipped around to look at him, and it may have been his deliriousness, but he swore he saw a relieved and frantic smile.
"He's coming," she assured, out of breath, putting one of her hands on his back. Theo felt his heart pumping as though it was in the back of his throat and making its way into his mouth, too fast, too hard, too much. She took her hand away, slick with mercury and water, but Theo didn't get to care about her panic at the sight.
"Liam?"
"He'll be here," Hayden said again, nodding her head enthusiastically, more to convince herself than him. She doubted he'd even notice. "You just have to stay awake, okay? Stay awake for Liam."
"Liam?"
"I'll be there soon, baby, I promise." Theo didn't know if Liam was still on the phone or if he imagined his voice nearby, but either way, Theo fought to follow his instructions and keep his eyes open.
However, Theo had learned that night already that following instructions didn't mean he wouldn't fail.
__
Things were beeping. He was cold and stiff, and the first thing he noticed about his surroundings was that he didn't like the smell. He couldn't pay attention to how his arms and legs felt, since the pain that was now coursing through him, the epicenter being the pit of his stomach, made him nauseated and even dizzier than before, just like how it had been before he blacked out. Pulsing, unordinary, tingling and burning.
He blinked his eyes open only twice before someone was talking to him - scolding him? - and he was put back into total darkness.
__
Harsh, freezing metal was all around him, but not the way it had been before in the past weeks. He was shivering again, but before he even opened his eyes, he could tell he was dry. There was still a bit of slightly damp hair stuck to his face, but he couldn't bring himself to reach up and fix it just yet.
As soon as he opened his mouth to check what he could taste, a groan slipped out of his throat and finally made it feel clear again. He furrowed his brow at the sound and forced himself to open his eyes only to be shot with light.
"Theo?" Someone asked next to him, half-asleep. Theo took his first deep breath and felt heavier, but he was more focused on the sleepy, comforting scent. He breathed it in and realized what it was with a start. A tiny smile came over his lips, just the corners of his mouth turning up lazily. He wanted to reach out, ask what had happened, say all the things that he knew he shouldn't, but all he could do was mumble like there was cotton in his mouth. "Theo!" Liam exclaimed, suddenly wide awake and shooting up to sit straight in his chair.
That movement convinced Theo to open his eyes, blinking away from the bright light. It took him a minute to realize where he was, but the scent of jars of mountain ash and eye of newt (or whatever that suspiciously knowledgeable veterinarian stocked) brought him back. He didn't think about it for long, since most importantly, he turned his head to see two baby-blue eyes looking at him with curiosity and concern a sight he hadn't seen in months. The last time Liam looked at him like that was when he was shot at the hospital.
"Hey," Theo managed to choke out of a dry mouth, knowing it was way too casual.
"You're awake, holy shit! Can you sit up? How are you feeling?" Liam asked all at once, putting a warm hand on his bare shoulder blade and helping him sit up on the table. Theo didn't answer at first, much more enthralled with the cool water bottle Liam handed him even though he wanted to talk. He just couldn't find the words; his brain still felt far too fuzzy and confused. "'Hey?' Theo, what the Hell?"
Liam socked him in the arm, and Theo scowled but broke into a small, weak smile. "What was that for?" Theo scoffed, rubbing the skin of his bicep, just then noticing that he was half naked in front of him. He did not, however, notice the way Liam's eyes dropped down to the hard muscles of his arms.
"You scared the Hell out of me! Did you think you were going to get away with a 'hey?'"
"But why did you punch me?" Theo asked, none short of sarcasm even as he felt his heartbeat start trying to even its pace out again. He must have lost a lot of blood.
"Well, I wasn't about to punch you in the face," Liam reasoned. Theo swung his legs so they hung over the side of the table instead of having them straight out in front of them, and Liam leaned with his hands on either side of him. Liam's smile faded a little into something softer. "How are you feeling?"
Theo shrugged, flexing his fingers like they were going to give him the answers. "...weird," He admitted, not wanting to go into the details too much. It worried him that there was this new feeling in his body, and if Theo was worried, Liam would be too. The werewolf didn't need any more anxiety in his life, Theo decided. "But better, I guess."
"Good," Liam said, looking like he wanted to say more, but he didn't. Instead, one of his fingers accidentally brushed against Theo's clothed thigh and the chimera hated himself for the way his heart jumped because of it without any way to hide it.
Liam was right there in his reach, and he realized with an uncomfortable feeling in his stomach that he might have never seen him again. He'd lied and said he was okay when he clearly wasn't, pushing back what he knew was the truth until he had almost died. Now, Theo had died before, but he could admit that it wasn't any less painful the second time around.
Theo found that he was really tired of holding things back.
He sniffed in a breath, expecting to find the normal stuffiness, but there was only the slightly sharp and stale air of the vet's exam room. There wasn't more than a tiny hint of the metal taste in his mouth, and he knew from experience that the way it tasted then meant that it was old, just lingering around, and he wasn't nearly as dizzy as he was before. Even his skin was clean, and although he couldn't tell, Liam had definitely noticed that some of the color in his face was back, making him appear less pale.
The only thing different about him was something seemingly heavier and larger-feeling, but once again, he didn't ask about it. Out of everything new, Theo wanted to focus on the fact that he was somehow fine.
Theo heard his companion take a deep breath. "Why didn't you tell me you were sick?" Liam asked gently, the question Theo had been dreading.
He couldn't exactly tell Liam that he had just been lying, since he had put Corey and Hayden in danger, but could he really admit to the werewolf's face that he thought he just wouldn't care? He didn't know which one would make Liam madder. His brain supplied him the worst-case scenario just a second later: there was no anger, because it was true; Liam wouldn't have cared at all, and he would agree.
"I thought I was okay," Theo said, softer than intended, and not altogether dishonest. "I had bled a little bit before, and it went away. I made sure that Corey was okay to make sure it was just me. It wasn't a big deal."
Liam bristled and his eyes flashed with hurt already, but he quickly corrected it and it was replaced with sadness. "That is a big deal. You almost-" Liam's voice cracked, and that hurt Theo more than the stiffness of his body. Liam's eyes flicked down to the floor, and when he opened his mouth, he didn't finish his sentence. Theo knew what he couldn't say anyway. "That doesn't explain why you didn't come to me before. We could have found something out, tried to help you, Theo!" The way Liam said his name so desperately struck a nerve.
Theo didn't know how to respond. He was still stretching hi arms and fingers, trying to place was what was different while waiting for Liam to relent. He had nothing he could say. "How are Corey and Hayd-"
"Theo," Liam said firmly, and his hand moved up to Theo's knee. He tried to catch Theo's eyes as the chimera looked down at his hands. The heat he felt coming off of Liam shocked him into meeting his eyes. "Why didn't you tell me? I wouldn't have made you run around and drag you everywhere. You were so much worse than Corey and Hayden."
Theo clenched his teeth and swallowed hard, throat still dry despite the water he had drank. "What cure do you think I was going to wait out for?" Theo shot, a little too harsh. Liam's lips parted slightly in surprise, eyebrows raising. "You talked about wolfsbane, the only solution I knew, like it was a fatal dose, and that Scott's bite was the only thing that would work as even a temporary solution. Look, it wasn't my intention to die, but what was I supposed to say?"
"How about 'help me?' It worked for Hayden and Corey-"
"Yeah, like Scott was going to help!" Theo borderline shouted above him, his voice still weak from how sore his throat was. "I highly doubt he would offer me a temporary out, let alone a permanent one. This way, you didn't have to watch me day by day get worse and I was able to just live normally for awhile longer."
Liam blinked at him and swallowed, lips still parted. Stunned, he sat back for a moment but got back up. "What do you think happened to you?" Liam asked, his voice strained to keep the anger out of it. Theo was surprised, expecting him to blow up or leave him alone, but the werewolf stayed calm. "The only way you could be saved was by the bite of an alpha or wolfsbane, and we didn't have any on hand." Theo looked at him like he was insane. "I called Scott. He couldn't get here in time."
Theo's stomach dropped when he realized what Liam was saying, and in a single heart-stopping moment, Liam's eyes flashed in the most mesmerizing shade of red he'd ever seen. A part of his arm stung like it had been shocked with bolts of electricity that sent shivers up his sine, and Theo's other hand instinctually went to grab at it. His eyes only left Liam's when he felt the heat coming off of his forearm, this time not from Liam. At least, not directly. "You didn't..."
Liam chewed on his bottom lip and nodded, eyes turning back to that comforting blue. "I had to," Liam said. "As it turns out, tension can really set in the effects of a true alpha. That and something in Scott's spit, I'm guessing."
Theo was at a loss for words and breath, marveling at the prospect of Liam as an alpha. He was being far too nonchalant about it, too, as if becoming someone fabled and rare was an everyday occurance. He should be contemplating, planning, philosophizing, not sitting with him doing nothing He could just imagine now what Liam would do with that kind of power, if he would follow in Scott's footsteps or recruit new members, but all that came out of him from the swirling river of questions was a strangled "Why?"
Liam's expression softened and the smile fell off his face easily. "Why what?" he asked, a quizzical but pained look on his face. "Why did I become an alpha? I don't know, but I'm just being grateful for it. Without it, you wouldn't be alive, and neither would Corey and Hayden. The combination of all the stress must have gotten to me." Theo nodded but bowed his head.
"You know that wasn't what I was asking."
There was a single second of silence, and Liam looked up at him. Theo saw the familiar anger in the former beta's face, and he almost wanted to sink into the normality of it. "You know what it's like to have nightmares," he said, shocking Theo. He didn't recall telling Liam about it. He guessed that was what he got for letting Liam know him better than he knew himself. "I've had them before, too. Berserkers and hanging off the hospital roof. You know better than anyone that that's awful, but Theo-" Liam's voice broke again. "Seeing you the way I found you was the most terrifying thing in my entire life."
Theo's breath caught in his throat. "No-"
"And I just...as soon as we carried you to my car you started to bleed again, and you said my name in your sleep, and instinct just kicked in. I started trying to remember all the times I wish I hadn't said something harsh to you, made you feel better about yourself, and what I could have done to make you ask me for help instead of pushing us all away. You were dying, and there was nothing I could do to stop it." Liam's words held anger and malice for once not directed at him, but himself, and his eyes brimmed with tears. "So don't you ever fucking say that it would have been better for you to die on your own," He growled.
"But why would you do that?" Theo demanded. "Why would you seriously want to deal with-"
"What the fuck? What did you think I was going to do, leave you for dead?"
"YES!" Theo cried incredulously, eyes wide open and lips parted.
Liam wilted. "Look, I have no idea what was running through your mind when you decided to give up. I don't know if you thought that nobody would help you or even care, but that's not how this works! So no, I wasn't going to let you die!" Liam yelled. He heaved in a breath and a tear dropped down his cheek. "Not the way I feel about you."
Theo's heart stopped. He watched with wide eyes as Liam came closer to him, not daring to let himself believe what he heard.
Liam's hands were on either side of his legs on the table and Theo was surrounded by everything Liam, but while his senses were screaming for him to do something, he was frozen. "I couldn't let you die. I...I don't know what I'd do without you," Liam whispered, and if it were at all possible, Theo's eyes widened more and his heart kicked up harder and faster.
He knew Liam's right hand had moved from the cold table, but he still gasped quietly at the feeling of his still-warm hand on his cheek, something he had unknowingly been craving for what felt like an eternity. He wasn't prepared for that or the second hand's thumb rubbing a circle into his hip, and he certainly wasn't ready when their eyes both shut on their own and he felt just a bit of air before a tiny brush to his lips.
Theo always had a heart time describing what he felt, but in that moment, it was perfectly clear. He felt a simple brush of lips against his own, barely a kiss that still made his stomach and chest explode with butterflies that fluttered through his body. There was a burning in his fingers and a sort of weakness in his neck and Liam, who he knew now more than ever that he loved and wanted nothing more than to be loved by. Liam pulled away by just an inch, eyes searching Theo's, anxious and questioning. Theo hot his hot breath against his mouth, enough for him to gather the courage to pull him back.
Even if it was his own move, Theo gasped at the now firm kiss and raised his hands to rest on Liam's neck, needing him closer, closer. Liam stood in between Theo's legs and took the invitation to deepen it, making Theo let out a low moan that he couldn't bring himself to care about the pride of. One of his hands made its way into Liam's long, ridiculous hair that he had wanted to card his fingers through so many times.
Liam held onto his face with both hands like he was precious, fragile, and Theo melted into his touch. The kiss was simple again, just lips on lips, but still perfect.
Theo had to pull back up for air first, not planning to stop. Liam swallowed and panted, tears in his eyes again as he obviously searched for the right thing to say. "I-I-"
"I'm so in love with you," Theo finished for him, nodding his head almost frantically. Liam flushed and seemingly melted.
"Oh god," the alpha breathed before he went back in for another kiss. "I love you too, I love you so fucking much."
Theo's fears started to fall apart all at once when Liam put his arms around his neck, hugging him tightly to his chest. "I love you," Liam whispered again against the top of his head. "I love you, I love you."
__
Liam was still holding him when the rest of the pack and Deaton came in. Deaton was holding his clipboard and Alec was holding onto Hayden's arm, since it was no secret to any of them that he had been trying to act tough and protective for her ever since she showed up, even though he was a year younger and had no idea who she was. Theo wanted to laugh when he saw it, since it was clear that Alec was the one who was scared and clingy, not her.
"Damn," Mason said, the first word uttered in the room, and Liam was the one to laugh. "I know this is a bad situation and it's really too soon, but I did not think you guys were going to figure this thing out so soon."
Liam grinned at Theo and rested the top of his head against Theo's chest, and Theo couldn't help but smile. "Get used to it," Liam said. "Theo's not going anywhere for a long, long time."
"Oh, great," Alec sighed, but everyone else laughed, including Theo, so Alec just scowled at everyone. "Fine, I promise I'll try and get used to this. Try."
"That's all I'm asking," Theo chuckled, not taking himself off of Liam.
The pack all hung around in the exam room while Theo regained enough strength to get up and leave, since Liam was being overprotective. Theo guessed he couldn't blame him for wanting to keep an eye on him after that.
While they talked, Theo learned more about everyone. Liam had bitten Corey and Hayden not too far after he bit Theo, and they were both trying to adjust to the new feeling again. For the time being, Hayden would stay in Beacon Hills for awhile longer while Deaton worked on something that might be able to help them. Theo didn't miss the way Hayden smiled at him and tried to be near him, either. Evidently, almost dying was a good way to make friends.
Liam didn't say what was going to happen next, since he didn't really know. What would he do as an alpha now? Would it be the same as it had been before? Would things start to change on their own? No one knew.
There was still so much to talk about and ponder, Theo realized as he idly listened to Corey talk about how different it felt to be a full werewolf and not a chimera anymore, but then Liam's arms wrapped around his middle and his tension faded away.
With Liam around, something told him he wouldn't have to worry.