Chapter Text
Have been informed that there have been more of the Edain, Men as they are called or call themselves, settling on the fringes of my lands. Was a bit concerned at this development at first, not knowing where these Men came from and who sent them and to what purpose (our Enemy may be lying low but one must be ever Vigilant), but the scouts sent to investigate reported nothing worth worrying over. They said that those Edain had previously dwelt in the lands of the Grey-Elves in the East but did not like their company and decided to leave, which is Understandable. I would probably have done the same in their position.
Got some more information on these Men from Finrod who has been writing to me about them for some time now (completely Unprompted, as always). They live short mortal lives, and no one knows where they go after their early death. Because their days are so few, even compared to Dwarves, they lack time to gather knowledge and skills, and remain often in great ignorance of the world around them, so much so that they saw fit to call Finrod “Wise” in their tongue: this is how low their standard for wisdom stands.
Having once or twice passed near their villages, I can add that the Edain are taller than Dwarves, but still shorter than us. The men often have beards, although never as long and thick as my friend Durin and his folks, but their women usually do not, as far as I can tell.
(Since my enlightening conversation with Durin, I have learnt it is Unwise to presume of someone’s sex based on what hair they may or may not have and where, as it can lead to much Awkwardness. Fortunately, Durin and I are past that now).
As it is, those Men do not have anything of value that could make me want to set up a trade with them, and they do not appear particularly interested in us, which suits me Fine. My lands are big enough that they can live in their corner of it, without ever needing to interact with me or my people. And are not the best neighbours the ones who Keep To Themselves and that you never have to see or hear? I wish my brothers would follow this example.
**
Came back from a long hunt to Good News and Bad News.
The Bad News was a letter from my uncle. Apparently, I have not paid the tribute I supposedly owe him as High King for the past twenty years and he is asking me to do so now Without Delay.
The nerves!
Just because we said that we will pay him tribute when we swore fealty to him did not mean we would tolerate him asking for it! Also, for all he knows, I am barely making ends meet, which means the heartless bastard would happily let his own nephew Starve and wallow in the Darkest Misery!
(Memo: Investigate if anyone could have let Fingolfin know of my actual accounts, rather than the ones carefully edited for the perusal of his scribes. If this is the case, that person will get his or her backside kicked so hard they will fly back all the way to Aman, This I Swear).
The Good News is that there is a company of Orcs on my lands, harassing the Edain villages, so I will get to kill something to soothe my nerves: there is still a Silver Lining to this situation.
**
Great victory over the Orcs: we fell on them as they least expected us, and those we did not slay on the spot, we pushed them into the river to drown. Do not expect that any of them would have made it on the other side to carry the news of their failure to their master. Pity, as the Enemy should be made aware that he cannot come and defy the Sons of Fëanor on their own lands without expecting Retribution.
The Edain were more battered than expected. Apparently, they endured the siege of the Orcs for many days before the news came to Thargelion, and suffered many grievous losses. Offered them food and shelter, so that they can gather their strength again. Their chief and his heir have both been slain and they are now led by the chief's daughter, Lady Haleth.
Lady Haleth appears quite young, although it is hard to tell with Edain, as their lives are so short – you think them barely grown when they already have a foot in the grave. Fortunately, Lady H. seems very hardy and full of life yet, as a number of Orcs have found out in a very Painful Way. I do not think they are many, even among the Eldar, who have ever shown such Valor.
**
The Edain have temporarily resettled nearer to my personal domain, so that the wounded can be better cared for by my people, and that they be sheltered if new Orcs were to attack as they are weakened. Lady H. did not seem too happy to have to accept my help, as she is Quite Proud, but she had to admit they did not have much choice in the matter.
Since I wish to be on better terms with the Lady, if she is to be a closer neighbour, I am thinking of inviting her to have dinner with me to properly honor her Deeds.
(Memo: check if there is any food that the Edain cannot stomach; one cannot be too careful, as those people, for all their courage, are still Very Fragile). .
**
Lady H. accepted my invitation with some mistrust at first – she is not very good at hiding her feelings, nor does she seem inclined to do so in any case. Maybe she too was worried about getting accidently poisoned by our food. Luckily, the cooks were very careful and we were able to finish the meal without any casualties (I have seen worse feasts; see the sorry affair when we gathered for Dear Tyelpë Begetting Day some years ago).
Admit I was a bit stricken with Lady H.’s appearance when I finally saw her cleaned of all the blood and the mud that had covered her after the fight. Even though one could argue the Edain are quite plain in appearance compared to us, she cut quite a Fine Figure. She was still wearing her armour, a simple thing without any ornament, but which quite suited her; she has broad shoulders, and strong arms too. Her eyes appear brown at first, but sometimes, when she gets animated, they seem to come alive with golden flashes.
Also, she has no beard, which I personally think is to her advantage.
(The reason I am taking the time to describe her in this diary is purely for posterity. Edain's lives are short, and their memories shorter, and they may want to learn more of her later on, when hearing of her Deeds, which shall not be forgotten so easily. That is all).
**
Offered Lady H. the hospitality of my own house after dinner, and noticed she was less hesitant than before. I am glad I made a Good Impression on her.
I still have some investigations to make regarding Edain's Customs because, when I bid Lady H. goodnight after leading her personally to her chamber and turned away, she looked very surprised, and maybe a little offended. I can only assume that her people have specific ways to wish each other good dreams.
Fortunately, when I called on her this morning, she greeted me quite politely, so I do not think she holds any grudges against me. She even let me accompany her as she toured her people's encampment, to ensure they lack nothing. I am glad to say she found no fault in my hospitality.
I mentioned to her that we have taken some pains to avoid giving her people anything that may be harmful for them, as we are aware of their Frailty.
In hindsight, I recognize that this may have been poorly worded. The Lady felt quite insulted by that term and said she would meet me in a friendly single combat to show me about the Edain's frailty. I shall have to be careful to restrain myself so as not to hurt her too badly.
**
Had my friendly fight with Lady H., to make up for my poorly thought-out comment.
I think, however, that I will not speak further of it (and I will be expecting my people to follow my example, if they wish to remain in my employment), for the sake of my Pride.
Without seeming unkind or resentful, however, I would say that she is not a very gracious winner and I'm sorry to say that Gloating does not become her too much (although the light in her eyes while she fights does).
**
Have forgiven Lady H. for the matter of the fight that I threw so as not to embarrass her. We have been spending most evenings in each other's company and, more often than not, she stays in one of the guest rooms, because the path to the Edain's encampment can get slippery and tricky after dark.
Have noticed that she still sometimes looks at me as if she is expecting something, especially towards the end of the evenings, but none of my enquiries among her people had given me any clue as to what she could be expecting. Finally decided to ask her directly, saying that if I had somehow failed in my hospitality, it was not for lack of respect for her but because I'm still unfamiliar with Edain's customs.
She hesitated quite a bit before answering me but in the end, she said that she had simply expected that I would join her in her chamber at the end of the evening. I told that, if that was all that troubled her, I would be happy to oblige her, even though I would have thought she found the dinner hall comfortable enough. I thought she looked taken aback by my response, although I cannot say why. Nevertheless, we went to her room, had a couple more glasses of wine and pleasant conversation to go with it, and I retired to my own quarters quite late, glad to have resolved that issue.
Nevertheless, as I think back to the end of the evening, I cannot quite shake the feeling that we still have not properly understood each other.
**
Had a long conversation with lady H. Apparently, she also thought we had parted on some kind of misunderstanding so tonight, she endeavoured to enlighten me on what precisely she had meant.
It was quite a long conversation, of which I will not report the particulars here, for I have always fancied that this diary, and the thoughts it contained, might one day be used for the edification of futures generation, and there was nothing Edificating about what Lady H. told me.
In fact, I would like this record to show that I am Shocked and Appalled at what the Edain apparently get up to behind closed doors (and sometimes not even behind doors, I have been told)! I am quite Outraged that Lady H. thought I would be inclined to do anything like that.
(It occurs to me that future readers of this diary might have also heard about my acquaintance with Lady Haleth from other sources. I am thus taking this opportunity to remind these readers that my brothers and cousins are quick to lie for malicious purposes, and that not a word out of their mouth is to be trusted. My relationship with Lady H. is Very Proper).
**
Further discussed with Lady H. the matters she brought to my knowledge last night. Have decided to take some notes, for research purposes. I will keep them separate from this diary however, and in a safer location, so that they do not fall into impressionable hands.
Noticed that, while Lady H. usually gets bored quickly when I try to question her about the details of Edain's customs, she seems very happy to discuss this particular matter quite at length. I have covered almost a full roll of parchment already (although to be fair, I had to add a number of diagrams for clarity's sake, and they take up more space).
This is all purely Theoretical of course.
(Or mostly at least. Sometimes practical demonstrations may be needed, but this is all for Academic purposes. This may after all be my chance to steal Finrod's title as the expert on Edain's customs).
**
Have retired early into my own quarter tonight, for the first time in weeks, in the blackest of moods, after an awful row with H. And it came out of nowhere too!
During dinner, H. told me that she deems that her people have now recovered enough to travel again, and that she will soon leave in search of new and safest lands. This caught me completely unaware, as I was sure that we had come to an unspoken understanding that my lands were as good as hers. (The first rule when talking to the Edain, apparently, is that nothing, no matter how evident, must remain Unspoken, or it will surely lead to awkwardness or disappointment).
I pressed her to explain the reasons behind her decision, since it did not seem to me that my hospitality has been lacking. She responded that, while she was very thankful, her pride would not suffer being anyone's vassal or living by anyone's charity.
To this, I answered that she did not have to become my vassal to live here; surely, we could imagine some other kind of Partnership. As for charity, I pointed out that, if that bothered her, she could consider all the enlightening discussions we have had lately about Edain's customs to be payment enough.
This last part Did Not Go Over Well.
Somehow, H. got extremely offended by what I said and for a moment, I feared for my own safety. I did not quite understand what she was furious about, despite her yelling at me quite at length, as I was busy avoiding various items of tableware being thrown at my head.
(Only upside of this whole mess was that the hideous ceramic platter Uncle Fingofin sent me as a diplomatic gift was smashed to pieces. Good riddance.)
**
Managed to talk with Haleth without suffering Grievous Bodily Harm.
Apparently, it is the highest insult, for Edain, to imply that a lady would be willing to trade... what we have been discussing in the evenings, against any kind of favor.
After much pleading on my part, however, H. had to concede that I had no way of knowing that beforehand and that my intentions were never to cause her offense. So I am Forgiven.
But she is still determined to leave me.
At least, we will part in friendship. This surely sounds better that the alternative, but my heart is not quite convinced.
**
Haleth and her people departed this morning. I have offered them all the supplies they may need, after arguing at length with H. to get her to accept them.
She probably did not realise how much it pained me to help her leave. Nevertheless, I still prefer to know that she is as safe as she can be.
And since it never rains but it pours, I received a letter from Maglor this morning. He, too, would like to visit me.
(You would think that claiming lands as far in the east as possible would dissuade the rest of my family from coming to pester me every other morning, but apparently, no such luck).
If he learns of the Edain's sojourn on my lands, he might want to make a song out of it, and then everyone will, as always, find it wonderful and I will hear no other tune for the next decade – I have seen it happen before to other unfortunate souls too many times.
(Also, I fear that if someone were to mention H.'s name in front of me, I'll do something dramatic, like scream or throw something, and this will start rumors, which I also do not need).
So I did the only sensible thing in such a predicament: to pretend I have never received Maglor's letter and promptly leave my house with strict instructions to my people not to let anyone know of my whereabouts.
**
Spent a few days wandering in the eastern part of my lands like a lost soul, sadly Musing on the Brevity of all Joys and Pleasures in Middle Earth and regretting bitterly the Undying Lands. Then, the weather got too cold and wet for such dramatic roaming, so I decided to go visit Durin and ask for his hospitality, so I could Muse further, but in confort this time.
Durin received me very graciously, as always, and thankfully did not ask any questions about my obvious dark mood. He offered me instead a tremendous amount of beer, which did a lot to lift my spirits. We stayed up very late, him matching me cup for cup, and I think I ended up telling him of my woes, and he offered me some very wise advice. At least, I assume it was wise, as I cannot quite remember it after sobering up, but I do know that I felt quite comforted when I heard him talk.
**
Went back home to find out, to my greatest relief, that Maglor had given up waiting for me and headed back home. Small mercies...
Despite the confort I found in dwarven halls, my heart remains darkened by H.'s absence and I miss our discussions. (All of them. Not just the ones I had to report in a different set of notes).
I may just retire in the darkest chamber I have, to brood on my misfortune for the remainder of this Age, as I can never feel Joy again.
**
Received a letter from Haleth. I retract my previous statement: I have never been so happy in my life. And now, without any further delay, I shall drop this diary and go and answer Her.