Chapter Text
I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE KINDA COOL TO SHOW THE ORIGINAL OUTLINE AND HOW DIFFERENT IT WAS!! SO here u go
Title: All Too Well
Relationships: Katsuki Bakugo/Izuku Midoriya
PROPOSED LENGTH: 7,500 words, oneshot format
Fic “Aesthetic”: “All Too Well” imagery is present throughout the fic, tying all the scenes together. There is very heavy symbolism in the actual fic being set in fall, a season where things wither and die and the color leaches out of the world.
Seasons as stages in life and relationships
Baku’s early relationship with Izuku is set in spring, with new growth and excitement and the rush of being young and in love
Their relationship intensifies during the summer. It’s hot and heavy, and Baku’s cool guy facade that he keeps up cracks wide open because he’s falling hopelessly in love
It ends in the winter
Plot Summary
Essentially, the fic is Bakugo sitting alone on a park bench thinking back on his past relationship with Midoriya, and how it all fell apart. They date from the end of high school and break up in college, and the first scene opens when Bakugo is visiting his hometown again on a long weekend.
Bakugo begins by thinking about how they got here to this point (coney island vibes… i’m sitting on a bench in coney island wondering where’d my baby go). He’s wrapped up in an his coat, but he’s stupid and he didn’t bring gloves or a hat or a scarf, and his hands are shoved in his pockets and his nose is bright red and freezing off.
Part 1: breaking into the school pool during the summer and going swimming, taking Izuku to the drive-through and watching a monster movie
Part 2: getting into that fight at the party at the end of summer
that day Izuku was dancing with some guy at a high school party, and Bakugo got fucking drunk and punched the guy in the face. Izuku asked Bakugo what’s wrong with him, and Bakugo kissed him. He tasted his own blood, and it was sweet
Izuku pushed him and asked what his fucking deal was, and Bakugo hated the way Izuku looked at him with disappointment. Bakugo tells Izuku “you’re mine,” and Izuku doesn’t look as mad.
Part 3: the big game
Baku and Izuku go to the afterparty for Bakugo’s first win of the season on his college’s soccer team. Everyone is impressed with Bakugo And everyone's over him and Midoriya's sitting alone in the corner, no one's really talking to him and he's, like, a little sad and after a while he just kind of gets up and goes outside. And then Bakugou sees him leaving, follows him out into the street, and he's like “where are you going?” Midoriya says he's cute, he's kind of tired and he wants to go home and Bakugou asks why he's leaving. And Midoriya says like Bakugo has a lot of people there he doesn't need him there too and says I want you here though. And then and then midoriya says you didn't even look at me all night you don't even notice if I'm there or not and bakugo says “where is this coming from? you know I care about you” and midoriya looks really miserable. He's like “no, I know, but it just doesn'--it doesn't feel like I fit into your life anymore sometimes.” (he either looks at the sky or looks sad lmao) And bakugo’s frustrated because he doesn't deal with emotions well, so he says “why are we doing this? Why are we fighting? this is supposed to be a happy time, we shouldn't be fighting right now.” And midoriya kind of looks at him helplessly. Bakugou gets annoyed and says Midoriya's making this about himself and that's selfish. Midoriya freezes up when Bakugo says that to him. Then Midoriya says “I'm sorry for being so selfish, then.'' and then he leaves.
Part 4: the birthday phone call
Their relationship is a bit strained after that. Midoriya shows up a friday night again to surprise Bakugo and they can’t hang out, have a little disagreement
A week later Bakugo has a really long day, he’s tired and exhausted from practice. Izuku calls him when he gets out of the shower, and it’s like 11pm. He says hi, and Izuku’s crying on the other line. Izuku says hey and Bakugo asks what’s wrong, worried. Izuku’s quiet for a really long time, and then he says “Kacchan, it was my birthday today.” Baku realizes he fucked up, and he starts apologizing, but Izuku doesn’t say anything. Then at the very end, Izuku says “I wish I could make you miss me half as much as I miss you.” Baku says he does miss Izuku so much, and he’s so sorry, and Izuku says that he’s sorry too.
Part 5: the surprise gone wrong
Bakugo goes to visit Izuku at his college. Izuku is surprised but not really happy to see him. He’s just indifferent. He tells Bakugo he can’t hang out because of midterms, and Bakugo is like “oh okay I’m sorry. No yeah I get it.”
Bakugo’s in the car, driving back, wondering if how he feels right now is the way he made Midoriya feel last chapter. He’s kind of dazed. Because Izuku’s eyes used to light up everytime Bakugo walked into the room, and he doesn’t know when that stopped happening
Part 6: The Time It Broke
But they're in the car and Bakugo picked up Midoriya from his college and they’re driving back to their Hometown and Midoriya’s just very, like, just quiet and reserved with him, he's like “thank you for picking me up” and Bakugo’s like “no problem I really wanted to see you” and Midoriya doesn’t know what he’s supposed to respond to that and it's just sad because this would never happen before. It’s a road trip together, usually they would be, like, over the moon to be with each other but now it's just quiet. They’ve tried talking a couple times but the conversation doesn’t work out, and then Bakugo asks “did I do something wrong? are you mad at me?” and Midoriya says that he didn't do anything wrong, he's just tired and Bakugo’s like “tired of what?” And Midoriya says “I'm just tired of, like, what we're doing. I don't--I don't know if I want to do this anymore” and then Bakugo looks over (they're still driving) and he asks “what do you mean you don't want to do this anymore?” and then midoriya kind of closes his eyes and says “I think we should just break up” and then Bakugo pulls the car over and he's like “what?” because he doesn’t think he’s processing that right, and Midoriya repeats himself “I think we need to break up” and Bakugo’s like “no, like, you can'--can't say stuff like that–like you don't do things like that” and Midoriya says “I can say what I want, you can't just–you can't just tell me not to say it” and then Bakugo is like “We can talk about it” and Midoriya is like “no this is a little bit too late for that” (or something like that “dead and gone and buried”) and then Bakugo goes out to Midoriya’s side of the car and pulls the door open he's like kind of pleading for him to talk to him and it's like eventually Izuku gets out of the car and he's just like he's very calm and reserved and Bakugo’s freaking out and they kind of have a little bit of an argument. It's not even an argument bc it's Bakugo pleading and Midoriya saying “no'' and then at one point Bakugo is like, like he's never said this before, but he finally breaks and he says that “I love you, please don't leave me, please don't do this.” Midoriya is a little surprised, but then he says “that's not enough,” and Bakugo says, “What?”, and Baku is DEVASTATED. This is his most vulnerable moment and he’s getting completely ruined out here. Midoriya looks at him calmly and says, “You loving me isn’t enough. Because I don’t love you anymore.”
Bench Scene
Bakugo’s back on the bench from the first scene. It’s been two years
Sometimes even good people can’t make it work, and Bakugo’s not a fucking good person, so he shouldn’t be surprised. He fucked up the best thing to ever happen to him.
And he drove past the Midoriya house today, just to see how things are now. There’s an unfamiliar car in the driveway, and it’s not Auntie’s van or Izuku’s beat up little Beetle.
And he pulled over the next street over and called Midoriya’s number, which he still has memorized. It rings a couple times, and then a man’s voice answers. Bakugo asks to speak to Midoriya, the man is like, “hey babe are you busy?” Bakugo hears something in the background, and then it’s very clear that the person on the phone is Midoriya’s boyfriend. The boyfriend says Izuku can’t come to the phone right now, and asks who bakugo is and if he can take a message. Bakugo says he’s nobody, and he doesn’t have anything left to say, and then he hangs up.
But, fuck, he can’t stop thinking about it. He remembers every little detail; the way Izuku’s hair looked slicked back and wet in the pool, the way Izuku smiled at him th, the way Izuku tasted like popcorn and soda that night they kissed in the lot of the drive-through movie theater with that shitty old werewolf flick playing in the background. He remembers the way Izuku’s eyes crinkle up when he laughs, and the way they fill up with tears when Bakugo makes him cry. He remembers everything all too well.
Stuff to throw away
It’s cold as fuck.
Bakugo had stormed out the front door of his parent’s house an hour ago without a scarf, his hat, or even a pair of gloves. It’s a fact he somewhat regrets as he shoves his freezing fingers further into the pockets of his windbreaker, the tips of his ears turning bright red.
The morning sun peeks out blearily from behind fluffy clouds, casting weak light all over the green fields around him. The city park is deserted at this early hour, but he kinda prefers it this way, anyway.
It’s still strange being home. He hasn’t been back to his hometown in over two years, not since his first, disastrous year of college, and being back is just--
It’s miserable. It’s fucking miserable, and he can’t bear it anymore.
Because these streets used to be drenched with technicolor brilliance, rainbow colors dripping off the rooftops and overflowing from the storm drains. Everything was once vibrant and vigorous and young, and Bakugo--
He’d been so fucking happy here.
But now the sleepy driveways and tired storefronts are shades of shifting gray, lifeless and tired, and everything Bakugo sees is a shadow of its former self. Because at the end of the day, it wasn’t the tidy streets or the
this small town that captured Bakugo’s heart. It was a boy with a mop of messy green hair, a crooked smile, and green doe-eyes.
And when he left Bakugo behind, that boy took all the colors with him.
Staying away for two years has dulled none of the pain. It still hurts just as bad as the day it all went to shit.
So Bakugo wanders the park pathways for a while, until the chirping of songbirds and the rush of the wind blowing through the pines is the only sound bouncing around in his head. He wanders into the treeline, watching the blue of the sky deepen through the bare branches of the oak and birch trees around him. He wanders till he finds a familiar spot, a gently rolling hillside with a great view of the whole park.
This was the spot he’d watch the Fourth of July fireworks, year after year. It was far away enough from the beaten trails
And Katsuki Bakugo tries to remember what life was like, back when the world still had color.
Everything is tinted with shades of memories, and Bakugo can’t walk down a damn street without reminiscing. The alleyways overflow with smiles and smirks, the driveways and boulevards drip with laughter, and the rolling hills of the city park are lit up with--with fireworks--
Fucking fireworks, and blinding smiles shining through the dark, and green hair hanging over even greener eyes, and tender gazes, and Bakugo can’t--he can’t think straight. He crashes down on a park bench, feeling the chill of the rough wood through the fabric of his thin sweatpants.