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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Sequel to Breathing Room

    Ilya Rozanov has spent five years holding Shane Hollander at arm’s length - not because he didn’t love him, but because he loved him too much to ask him to risk everything for something that could fall apart. He was good at that: the careful distance, the walls that looked like indifference, the way he’d learned to be close without being close. He’d had a lot of practice.

    What he didn’t have practice for was what came after he was done lying to himself. He didn’t have practice for this - for something warm and bright and absolutely terrifying. Something that fits in the spaces between games and cities and the distance between Boston and Raleigh. Something that makes Ilya think, for the first time in a long time, that maybe the risk is worth it.

    He just needs to figure out what to do with it all before their careers swallow them whole

    He doesn’t get the chance to think about it for very long.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    137,840
    Chapters:
    10/11
    Comments:
    144
    Kudos:
    906
    Bookmarks:
    357
    Hits:
    34,907

    18 Aug 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane Hollander arrives in Vegas with a question he hasn’t spoken out loud.

    It isn’t complicated, exactly. It’s just the kind of question that requires honesty he isn’t sure he’s ready for - about what he and Ilya Rozanov have been doing for the past few years, about what six months of silence after Sochi actually meant, and about whether any of it is worth staying close to or whether he finally needs to go.

    He gets his answer in a locked bathroom at the NHL Awards.

    Ilya spends the summer convinced that Shane is fine. Upset? Yes. Angry? Definitely. But Shane always felt things fiercely despite what everyone said about him when he had his back turned. He’d calm down over the summer and then he’d be there like he always had been. He fills the silence with discipline and routine and the comfortable certainty that later is still available to him.

    He’s wrong.

    By the time Ilya understands what he actually lost, Shane is already gone; and Ilya is left trying to find a way back to someone who closed the door long before Ilya had ever thought to just walk through it.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    77,971
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    309
    Kudos:
    2,051
    Bookmarks:
    851
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    65,794

    17 Aug 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    The story of why it took Nicholas David Hollander twenty eight days to get his name.

    Or

    Ilya Rozanov breaks things off with Shane after his father’s death. Two months after that, Shane finds out he’s six months pregnant. And three months after Shane’s life fell apart, he has a baby. Things do not go well.

    Or

    Shane Hollander has no idea what to do with a baby he didn’t plan and doesn’t want yet.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,152
    Chapters:
    2/4
    Comments:
    63
    Kudos:
    583
    Bookmarks:
    150
    Hits:
    15,261

    15 Aug 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Jane
    [1 image]

    Ilya stared at the photo of a tiny, red faced baby. He wasn’t sure why Shane was sending him a photo of a random newborn.

    Lily
    Cute! Whose baby is that?

    Jane
    She’s ours

    Lily
    What?

    Jane
    I had a baby an hour ago

    ***

    Before Ilya and Shane meet at the cottage, Shane very very unexpectedly has a baby. Chaos (and love) ensues.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,490
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    351
    Kudos:
    12,898
    Bookmarks:
    1,709
    Hits:
    96,923

    14 Aug 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Boston, 2014. The night the Raiders win the Stanley Cup, Ilya Rozanov sees a woman across a crowded club and tells his best friend he just met his future wife.

    Jane is a sports management student at Boston U, a part-time barista, and—unbeknownst to the hockey star currently trying to charm his way into her pants—the same Shane Hollander who beat Ilya for gold at the 2009 Junior World Championships. So she's trans, anxious, and absolutely certain that a notorious womanizer like Ilya Rozanov would never look twice at her if he knew the truth.

    But Ilya doesn't give up. Not when Jane runs from him the first night. Not when she refuses to give him her number. Not when he discovers exactly who she used to be.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,870
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    148
    Kudos:
    686
    Bookmarks:
    209
    Hits:
    7,209

    14 Aug 2026