Crescent4275
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It's Hard Out Here for a (Pureblood) Prick by blessdtoaster
Fandom Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
01 Jan 2026
- Words:
- 575,245
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 82
Bookmarked by Crescent4275
10 Aug 2025
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Summary
"All her growth was the conveying of a corpse of hope."
(From 'The Rainbow', D.H. Lawrence)This is a story about coming into one's own, a meditation on the twilight of girlhood and the violence of crash-landing into womanhood. Follow Hermione as she navigates through the quagmire: Saving the world, getting top grades, falling in love, lust, and a whole lot of trouble, and comes out of it hopefully (at least) partially sane.
Series
- Part 1 of Here We Go Round The Prickly Pear
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 728,096
- Chapters:
- 108/108
- Collections:
- 11
- Comments:
- 7,104
- Kudos:
- 11,122
- Bookmarks:
- 6,205
- Hits:
- 1,229,180
Bookmarked by Crescent4275
24 Feb 2025
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Summary
“You need an orgasm.”
That was absolutely the last thing she’d thought Draco Malfoy would ever say to her. Did he even consider her a sexual creature? How interesting. But regardless, his advice was useless because orgasms weren’t something she had ready access to.
“Excellent advice.” She turned a corner suddenly and quickly trotted up the steps. He barely faltered, keeping up with her seamlessly, uncowed by her unwelcoming tone.
“That sounded sarcastic.”
“Ten points to Slytherin,” she said, even more sarcastically, and then winced when she remembered that, as Head Girl, she actually had the authority to grant them and would probably see an additional ten emeralds in their vessel at dinner.
Bugger.
———
Or where Hermione has never had an orgasm and Draco cannot abide.
(This has turned into a full-on sexploration with romance as the plot, and is my ode to sex, good communication, and all my favorite tropes)
Series
- Part 1 of You Do It For Me Universe
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 277,478
- Chapters:
- 53/?
- Comments:
- 4,271
- Kudos:
- 7,777
- Bookmarks:
- 3,258
- Hits:
- 743,321
Bookmarked by Crescent4275
23 Feb 2025
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Summary
Hermione Granger has no right to turn up on Draco Malfoy's doorstep with a cigarette between her teeth, a familiar heirloom in her pocket, and a litany of agendas hidden in her shadowy potions laboratory.
When she asks him to pull down his walls of occlusion and confront things long buried by assuming the form of his one-time best friend, Draco falters. But vengeance courses through his veins, and there's nothing he craves more than a chance to take down the enigmatic and dangerous Aleksandr Nott.
Even if it means invoking the ghosts of their twisted past. Even if it means staring into the mirror and seeing Theo's face grinning back at him…
“Right now my mercy and my potion are all that stand between Theo and death.”
“By your own description, it sounds like he’s already dead.”
She didn’t let him see any of her pain, old or new. "Oh.” She blinked. “But you never asked if I could save him."
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 190,151
- Chapters:
- 25/25
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 836
- Kudos:
- 550
- Bookmarks:
- 326
- Hits:
- 30,536
Bookmarked by Crescent4275
23 Feb 2025
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Summary
At the very cusp of a much-longed-for shift in their friendship, Hermione Granger vanished. Draco Malfoy, ever-devoted and painstakingly adept at dismantling mysteries, would spend the next seven years and a day seeking for his disappeared witch.
And then Hermione—ever-contrary, hauntingly remote, aggravatingly withholding, in possession of disquieting power—ends his hellbent search by storming his study and demanding that he give her access to Malfoy family lore.
Draco untangling the mystery of Hermione’s disappearance and just-as-maddening return plunges him into a quest that breaks realms, magical jurisdictions, standing warrants, sacred bargains, ancient truces, the demands of space and time—and, rather importantly, his already tenuous grasp on his restraint regarding his long-lost, brilliant, terrifying, distressingly brown-eyed witch. But, then again, Draco prides himself on being highly adaptable.
If he could not make Hermione stay put, then he would make her keep him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 255,269
- Chapters:
- 33/33
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 743
- Kudos:
- 861
- Bookmarks:
- 917
- Hits:
- 84,472
Bookmarked by Crescent4275
23 Feb 2025