Ishap_03
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Summary
Eddie keeps forgetting that he has a girlfriend. Or that Buck has a boyfriend.
a.k.a:
Chimney's bachelor party, as told in two parts.
Bookmarked by Ishap_03
28 Apr 2026
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“I’m a normal size.”
“No,” Buck says, insistent. “It’s— it’s thick, Eddie. Like— a real handful thick.”
Eddie ducks his head, swallowing hard. “I’m a— grower. By your definition. It gets bigger.”
Buck is still staring at him. Eddie does not look back. “Like an inch bigger?”
Grabbing his beer from the table, Eddie takes the last sip, hoping the chill of it will be some kind of cool balm over the flames within. It doesn’t help much. Quietly, he answers, “More.”
Buck gasps, loud and theatrical. “More?”
“Yes. Alright?” Eddie says tightly, his body flushes hotly. “More.”
A long second ticks by.
Abruptly and a little loudly, Buck asks, “Eddie, how big is your cock?”
Or: Buck finds out Eddie is hung. Seriously hung. This is mindblowing information to possess, apparently.
Series
- Part 17 of cjo + 911
Bookmarked by Ishap_03
17 Apr 2026
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Christopher knows his dads have sex. He just doesn't expect to hear it. And he definitely doesn't expect to get hard while listening to it in the hallway.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,654
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
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- 11
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- 91
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Bookmarked by Ishap_03
15 Apr 2026
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Oh, alright, cool.
Cool, cool, cool. Neat.
That is a photograph of Eddie Diaz's dick.
It's just there. On the screen. In his hand. In high resolution. His best friend’s dick is in his hand. Well, wait — the photo. The photo of the penis is in his hand. Eddie’s dick isn’t in his hand. That would be absurd.
It’s just a penis. Buck has one of those.
So does Eddie, apparently and it’s… Buck has seen it, absorbed it, and every thought he's ever had has been replaced by a high-pitched tone and the image in front of him, which is — and this is the last coherent observation he'll produce for the foreseeable future —
Big.
Genuinely, impressively big.
Buck closes out of the photo and locks the phone so hard he's surprised it doesn't crack in half.
"Maddie say anything?" Eddie asks.
"Yep," Buck squeaks. Like a mouse. A giant, shocked mouse that has just seen its best friend’s erect dick.
"You okay?"
"Great. Y-yep. So great. I-I'm just really— the sunset was really— it's very— yep."
"It’s yep?"
"Uh-huh. Very yep."
Or,
Stumbling upon your straight best friends' nudes is fine. Buck is fine. Everything is fine.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,795
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- 1/1
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- 3,219
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Bookmarked by Ishap_03
13 Apr 2026
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Summary
ret·ro·grade ˈre-trə-ˌgrād
- being in motion in a direction contrary to that of the general motion of similar bodies
- affecting memories of a period prior to a precipitating event (such as brain injury or disease)
- to go back
After an accident leaves Eddie with amnesia, Buck takes him home to recover, and in the absence of his memories, Eddie reveals parts of himself he’s kept hidden for years.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,984
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 156
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- 1,669
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- 367
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- 17,506
Bookmarked by Ishap_03
04 Apr 2026